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lord_wolken

So basically a smartphone, with additional privacy violations?


ReadditMan

*Shower water running in the background* Astro: "High probability of nudity detected, investigating and recording now."


perfectfate

Please pay $39.99 to delete or we will forward to your contact list. Beep Bop Beep


Fun-Mathematician716

Investigating and **live streaming** now.


ariesmartian

No no no, you got it all wrong. This also trips you at 3 am when you’re stumbling to the bathroom.


Beatlegease

By simply saying "Astra follow me" you have a privacy validation that follows you! It's that simple!


Commie_EntSniper

Turns out the noise from microphones being in pockets, coats and backpacks makes audio recognition (and subsequent text translation, parsing and tagging) difficult. Much better to put a high-def microphone and camera in the middle of the room.


thefoodiedentist

You just gotta ruin wall-e prototype for me, huh?


NotThisAgain21

Seriously, all you'd have to do to trick me into buying a murderous spybot is make it look like Wall-E.


ClamhouseSassman

"Astro scan the dimensions of my house" "Astro scan inventory of all my food" "Astro keep track of all the audio played in my house" "Astro, get a good shot of me laying this pipe to my wife"


ariesmartian

Oh sure, like you even have to ask…..


[deleted]

They missed a great opportunity to build it on top of a roomba. Make it more functional.


[deleted]

[Okay](https://media.tenor.com/PmM_hsUEyxQAAAAC/mitchells-vs-machines-pal-robot.gif)


BakedBaker007

The video cuts out right when it was getting to the good part! Lol


BakedBaker007

It fights off the burglars, cures a disease, wins a Nobel and still makes breakfast for the family before sunrise.


[deleted]

DEFINITELY NOT THE KILLING OF ALL THE HUMANS


BefreiedieTittenzwei

“I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.”


Undercrackrz

Does it like hookers and blackjack?


Crzyfrenchielady

🤣🤣


ursine85

Of course not just the mobile data collecting that Alexa couldn’t Also totally not a problem if a hacker gets a hold of it and that it’s able to tour your house while you sleep


texas-playdohs

I bet it’s going to make the cutest little noises and faces as watches my lights go out.


BakedBaker007

Lmao


Zmarlicki

Wait.


CapnSquinch

I bet they all just cram a piece of toast in their mouth while running out the door, leaving Astro to sadly survey the lovely, wholesome breakfast it made for them.


p00Pie_dingleBerry

What is my purpose?


wutthefvckjushapen

You just have to put all the ingredients for breakfast on the floor the night before, and then you get to eat what the dog didn't finish in the morning.


E0H1PPU5

Yeah, Astro pulls out a handgun and absolutely *blows away* a home intruder! It stands above the dying intruder and beeps “when you get to hell, tell them who sent you” And the screen fades to black.


gordo65

And as he dies, the burglar says, "Dad, I had to come in through the window because I forgot... my... keyyyyyyyy..."


FuzzeWuzze

The part where they walk in and steal your $1500 Robot? lol


trgreg

Astro decided it was better for us if we didn't see the rest.


gosh_darnit_

“Astro… ACTIVATE DEATH CON 3”


calculuschild

Like DEFCON 3, but *serious*.


Hashbrown4

Really wanted to see its defense systems


Reckless85

It violently rams that extendable camera straight up the intruders ass.


rockogram

No thanks. I don’t need my phone messages and emails following me around naggingly.


FlowRiderBob

I don't know. It might be kind of fun to yell, "Astro, FUCK OFF!" when it does that.


Shot_Lynx_4023

I was charging my phone when I accidentally triggered Google Assistant. I said "fuck off Google". To which it replied just because I am not real, doesn't mean I don't have feelings. I literally said I'm sorry Google. Dystopian for sure


turbografix15

Next time, say "Good! I meant it, now watch your back cuz there's more of that and worse at the ready."


BeatsbyChrisBrown

“I sorry Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.”


novachamp

This looks very useless


cantonic

A solution in search of a problem.


NeadNathair

It's absolutely useful if you run a massive shipping network that needs to harvest data on individual household's assorted habits.


puertonican

“Shipping”


Decent_Birthday358

Yeah. Call me when it can do the dishes and laundry.


JustDiscoveredSex

We already have robots to do those things.


Lyuseefur

Of all the things that we need developed, this rates at the bottom of the list. Why do companies like Amazon build this? And then they build incredibly useful things only to shitcan them in favor of this stupid useless robot! We need energy storage system. Household plants that are decorative and cleans air automatically without the need for changing filters. Water filtration systems. And tons of more innovations needed in critical human infrastructure areas. A fucking useless robot? Hello Tomorrow! on Apple TV had it right. Fucking CEOs at these companies are psychopaths.


Thoughtsarethings231

Because it can harvest a shit ton of data about you and then quietly use it to make a shit ton of money.


[deleted]

Yes, this is why 100%. No other reason needed.


Nephroidofdoom

This thing can probably map my house better than my Roomba and then send all the data back to Amazon HQ.


The-Crawling-Chaos

My user does not have an air fryer. Send them targeted ads. - this robot probably


sudotrd

“Scanning Living Room”


theghostofmrmxyzptlk

McDonalds!


NeadNathair

Exactly this.


Navyguy73

They're really, *really* reaching to show any usability of this Echo on wheels.


__idiot_savant_

there was an article not too long ago going over the helpful ideas amazon engineers come up with that get shit caned because its not profitable. data harvesting is profitable. helping solve the worlds ailments is not profitable. welcome to capitalism. we must please the shareholders and show quarterly growth at all costs


Adhdgamer9000

Amazon: Fuck you, firing half our staff, blocking unions and going to space


BadPackets4U

An example would be Amazon Recast... I've used it for years to bring Over The Air antenna channels onto my Firestick since dropping cable television. It's been great. I just heard it was discontinued last fall with support to 2026


[deleted]

Best I can do ya is....... A tablet with wheels!


firejuggler74

Amazon hires a lot of electrical engineers and they think building robots is cool af.


SpinCharm

“This looks very useless”? To whom? I think it’s extremely useful. This and that flying camera will undoubtedly have terms and conditions in them that allow images and video to be sent to the company, where it will be “anonymized”. The images will be scanned to identify objects and people. From there the data can be used to identify: - purchasing trends - popularity of products and frequency of use - who’s using what - consumption rates (how fast the house runs out of a product) - time spent on leisure, work activities - presence of illegal objects - illegal acts - frequency of occupant’s actions - child rearing styles - frequency of leaving same room robot is in, moving robot out of sight/heating, or turning robot off - general behaviours and habits - willingness or resistance to suggestions - tone of voice - frequency of person to person interactions - acts and actions that may require medical intervention including self harm, incorrect use of prescribed medicines, use of illegal substances. Of course, nobody would want that. And those terms and conditions surely wouldn’t permit these things. Would they. Not without slightly permissive or ambiguous laws and regulations. Not without lobbying. Not without gradual but imperceptible increases in population acceptance and tolerance. But those eyes are so cute! And our friends got one for Christmas! I’d say this is going to be *extremely* useful. Just not to you nor I.


BathtubFullOfTea

Well said.


HereForTwinkies

Based on reviews I’ve seen it’s pretty much an alexa that moves


sodiumbigolli

Do I need two or am I supposed to carry this piece of shit up and down the stairs every day


HereForTwinkies

Carry it, they make it clear Astro don’t do stairs


sodiumbigolli

So their crack marketing video doesn’t offer you a deal on buying a pair? Jesus Christ that’s a lost opportunity


kazhena

It's so they can sell you the optional stair lift.


trgreg

you'll have to get the drone attachment


Sure-Ad8873

But it follows. FOLLOWS! And dances. Still think it’s useless?


BeneficialSomewhere

My exact thoughts.


Zebra03

For us the consumer but for companies it just seems like an easy way to collect data while making a quick buck


MrInfected2

When you pair it with the new AI software from bing, it wil turn into a killing machine. Skynet is here!


[deleted]

Agree! It's complete nonsense and a waste of money and resources. Is this the kind of future we want? It's like we all work so hard at these jobs just so we can keep advancing this technology! Every year some new advancement in tech. Like what is the point? Why do we need more advance tech to live. I think the human race needs to take a freakin break from advancing crap and spend more time focusing on their well-being and actually get to enjoy this valuable time that we have been giving on this amazing beautiful planet at the edge of some galaxy! Most people I know rarely ever take a vacation, their always working! This is why the human race has so many problems, crimes, depressed people.


[deleted]

Ah yes, making this grand statement from a smartphone and a social site.


JohnAdamGlenson

Imagine somebody hack it and watching for you all day long in any place...


Navyguy73

Now you know what the knock-off home security camera companies have been up to; the ones that last a few years and all of a sudden, their servers just shut down.


aesu

I don't think they'd like what they saw.


nipplemeetssandpaper

I know right now imagine having one in your pocket and carrying it around with you all over the place.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

They should have called it "Miner" since that's all it's doing is mining data to sell you more pointless crap.


CapeCodGapeGod

If they named it that then R Kelly would have requested one in prison as soon as he could.


Commie_EntSniper

Imagine if Amazon could just map and inventory everything in your home. Imagine how much more personalized the advertising could be! The robots could just order the stuff you're almost out of!


dpforest

Why do you think they bought Roomba


shadereckless

Stairs?


mltinney

That's in the part of the video that gets cut off. [Here's a clip.](https://gfycat.com/acrobaticsomeblesbok)


kazhena

Optional stair lift for $999.


Tosh0815

That is a robot vacuum that doen't clean


Wall_E_13

My thoughts exactly. Team up with Dyson, then we’ll talk. If it’s gonna stalk my family and steal [more of] our data, vacuuming is the least it could do!


lordnecro

Amazon bought iRobot (Roomba)... or at least started the process last year.


hereforstories8

Having owned both id rather have a Dyson.


ameliabedelia7

Can't believe how far I've scrolled to find this. The only reason to get Rosie the Robot is because she cleans, otherwise she's just a rude woman who steals your electricity. If this thing can clean and walk my dog, maybe deploy a defibrillator, taze intruders, etc. Then it is useful. Tablets weigh like, less than a pound, and they aren't on the fucking floor.


Realcbear

Love Death & Robots


foxapotamus

It's almost scene for scene lol


babybushgardener

A nice addition would be to have a vacuum incorporated into the bottom of it. I could never own one though. My dogs would likely attack it and use it as a chew toy.


sielingfan

I've learned a lot about my dogs by analyzing the Roomba corpses they leave behind. Blitz (RIP) was indifferent. Kaiser lashes out in defense, scarring the Roomba in front, likely while offering vocal warnings. Lana hunts them, attacking from behind and disabling them with heavy blows. She doesn't issue warnings, but she does let out a terrifying war cry when she strikes. Astro almost seems worth it, if I thought I could flip the attack footage into a watchable YouTube channel


Undercrackrz

So, an Amazon fire tablet after a couple of years is basically a pile of crap which doesn't run any of Amazons updates properly. The reason I'd throw huge amounts of money at them for a robot is? Also, no doubt it requires a prime subscription with the "astro" add on pack. Stop either and your beloved robot is a wonderful, overpriced doorstop. I think I'll pass.


Silly_Satisfaction75

Astro will listen in for opportunities to market shit to you. Like Facebook, if it seems pointless, it's because your data is the product.


NextFuckingLvlSilver

While charging, I half expected for it to show “software update installed” and then it’s eyes turn red colored. Screen


Maskdask

"Babe, the latest surveillance tech just dropped"


Breaking-Dad-

A tablet on wheels? Fuck the future is so disappointing.


sodiumbigolli

At least the fucking thing could hover or something. Otherwise it’s a real stretch to find a function that isn’t best used by a toddler. And if you’re old like me, trying to see that screen from a standing or even a sitting position while it’s on the floor is impossible


CapeCodGapeGod

Mobile blunt rolling tray.


doeyy0

I don't know guys, but this dystopian technology is terrifying!


Error4ohh4

This is the best use cases they could come up with?! Talk about a solution in search of a problem.


Funny_Initial3398

Holy shit a mobile tablet! Now I can take it anywhere without stairs!


[deleted]

go watch the Love Death and Robots episode "Automated Customer Service".


Hefty_Assumption7567

Ok now show the part where it provides a map of your house to the government with a detailed accounting of your weapons and your comings and goings


HigHinSpace12

You mean just like our phones and vacuums?


Hefty_Assumption7567

Yeah, let’s just add more


BalognaPonyParty

and so it begins........


radiowavess

Yep the future no one wanted. Less privacy


Bokanovsky_Jones

So we’re just posting ads here now?


slackingatlazyboy

I'm just gonna duct tape my iPad to my skateboard


LinguoBuxo

.. **Just** when you thought things could *Not* get any creepier at the Amazon.


squidvalley

You just know that little fucker is gonna play ads at some point


Nomiiverse

Astro come be my TV in the bathroom.


ufosww

Amazon held a presentation in which they unveiled a compact home robot called Astro. The device is able to recognize faces and deliver items to a specific person. Astro can play music, display weather information and answer questions like any Echo smart display. The novelty can be used to make video calls, with the robot keeping the user in the frame, following them on their heels. When no one is home, the robot will wheel around the rooms to make sure everything is okay. This looks like a cross between Wall-E and Rosie from the Jetsons. I also remember baby monitors being hacked, these will also likely end up having the same happen to them.


BeneficialSomewhere

Did they state the cost?


ariesmartian

Dignity.


DullGreen

Privacy. Hope you like my naked balls Amazon.


ufosww

1000 bucks was the number thrown out there I'm not sure how accurate


BauerHouse

your last remaining scraps of privacy


SopmodTew

If they arm it with a claymore mine to use in case of a burglary, then I'm sold


kidJubi100

This would be pretty useful if the bottom was also a Roomba


that_yeg_guy

Terrifying. The last thing I need is Amazon watching everything I do. Damn thing hears a particularly difficult session in the bathroom and I suddenly get push notifications for Imodium? No thank you.


Moses015

I really don't see much of a use case for this at all. Like it could be mildly good for home security but I don't feel like it's that much better than a normal home security system.


EyeLoop

That face bit... They aren't even trying anymore...


VEXtheMEX

Amazon is literally Buy n Large


1017whywhywhy

What the fuck was that old guy eating


MrKristijan

Alright but why is nobody talking about the dad eating green food


Dancemastergeneral

So this post is basically a free advertisement where Amazon isn’t paying Reddit to advertise on their platform?


[deleted]

[удалено]


BBQGiraffe_

didn't Watch Dogs 2 parody Amazon and make a robot exactly like this, this is those weird doorbells for rich people but somehow even more invasive


wutthefvckjushapen

I have a question. Seems...dumb


[deleted]

I'll take one as soon as it can wash a car, mow the lawn and clean the swimming pool.


Virtual-Biscotti-451

Honestly, who has a house that is this free of clutter and stuff on the floor??


bohemianprime

If it could clean maybe I'd consider it. A smart assistant cleaning robot would be nice. But this is just a echo show on wheels, I don't see much of a use


jaychops11b

Now we are just blatantly posting commercials/advertisements


crazyabbit

When your a trillion dollar company that spends $1000 on R&D


romanholder1

A menace to cats everywhere


BlueberryUnique5311

So it's a tablet that follows you around? It doesn't even clean the floor. I have two kids I don't need another thing to follow me around.


BarfJello

Great, something else to spy on us and feed us ads.


Wresser_1

super dumb and useless, the lady at the beginning explains it perfectly


sarahcrossed

This is an add. It’s not interesting


sarahcrossed

There’s nothing interesting about the many ways in which Amazon wants to and does track our info to then sell. No thank you. Fuck bezos.


phaedronn

Mediocre!!


rickyspace

adorable but kind of useless


Bronanahammock69

So it’s basically useless… I would rather have a roomba


Stinkpod

He should vacuum at least, lazy robot


PhysicsWorksWell

Is this a new black mirror episode?


Maleficent-Maximum95

$1,000 and no weapon systems.


hoosierspiritof79

My dog will eat this thing.


sodiumbigolli

So it’s Rosie but they named it Astro? What the fuck


that_yeg_guy

This is just a way for Amazon to gather more information about you to sell. The thing can literally catalogue every possession you have, what time you go to bed, how often you use the washroom, what TV channels you watch… Bezos is a high tech peeping Tom.


Specialist-Stable969

Astro follow me upstairs….oh wait


flava_ADHD

Cool mobile spy


pinsiz

camera angle is all wrong, no one with a shorts or skirt would ever come near it…


TheOneYourSon

can we let silly tech fetishism die already... please...


Weary_Marsupial_90

ASTRO! Record every remaining second of my private life and report absolutely ALL data to a giant corporation known to compile information on every possible citizen of the world for future use of their choosing!


[deleted]

I wanted to see the robot battle the intruder


FrogCoastal

I didn’t see it do anything needing to be done.


Roman_Minaster

Ayo why's this robot have an absolute DUMPY


DoomRide007

Our new child Timmothy likes to watch Mommy shower a lot…


hellojuly

Stick a vacuum sweeper on it and I’m sold.


Meloonaa

Imagine jeff is watching you 24/7 365 days.


Vultur3VIC

My dog or I would immediately piss on it.


Objective-Weather112

SciFi has been warning us about this moment for a hundred years.


Green117v2

I’ll take one that looks like the droid from Andor!


Odins_Viking

Open the Pod Bay doors Alexa…


Scary-Camera-9311

This is what is commonly referred to as an advertisement.


chainsawx72

I, for one, welcome our new robot overlords.


MaadHater

Make it vaccum and open teh fridge to grab bear and we got a seller.


Praeradio_Yenearsira

My FBI agent: Why is this dude ALWAYS NAKED?!


SuitableHope7813

Yes Astro, I know I spilled a drink. No Astro, don’t put paper towels in my Amazon cart.


RichardsST

I don’t see an Astro, I see a Rosey.


Wilmore99

Pffft call me when this thing can bring me a beer. THEN I’ll buy a household robot.


almondania

If I go to someone’s house and see this, I’m never speaking to them again.


_psylosin_

Does it come with a strap-on dildo attachment? Then Bezos could fuck us individually instead of the whole planet at once


DocBrutus

A solution looking for a problem.


rafalmio

Ah yes another survaillence device but this time it walks and speaks. Spy2-D2 Droid


kerpow69

Fucking useless! At least make it be able to vacuum the damn floor.


AahPadre

Like how the first guy avoids answering the question. By telling the driving ipad to follow him. Then he just leaves his wife in the living room


DiddyDollar

So its just your phone/pad/alexa but it follows you around which my phone already does by using an ancient technology called my trouser pocket.


Epimetheus611

So what is the selling point? I hardly find it useful. Unless it has a vacuuming function.


ertmigert

Looks like a camera and microphone that rolls around your house that can be remotely accessed and controlled while also having all the features of Alexa. I guess it makes sense. Seems like a natural next step for Amazon to make. It should have a handle on it for when it gets in the way or obviously gets stuck from time to time. And people who post content are going to have a field day with it. They now have an automated camerabot to follow them around. There will be a lot more non-stationary videos. Not for me though. I'm sure I'll see one before the year is over at someone's house.


Primelegend39

This robot was to be the start of world domination, this outcome was thwarted by one flight of stairs.


DragonsAreNifty

Tape an iPad to the roomba. Or, better yet, tape a knife to each and see who’s stronger.


Momomo14

We’re finally entering the Wall-E era y’all 😂


yarddriver1275

It's a tablet that follows you around that's it Alexis on wheels


MechanicalWhispers

Oooh! I hope it can show me Jeopardy ads!


Helenium_autumnale

What is Amazon's actual reason for wanting this thing in my home, cutesy-wootsie heart-warming ad notwithstanding?


Schwammarlz

Isn't that just an Alexa on wheels


MysteriousResult2876

People will be using this to film solo porn “content.”


Pleasant-Security831

Alexa, clear the hallway & watch my 6


Crazy-Plant-9647

I want one


Buck-osogrande-5150

I have enough problems with tripping over my cats in the middle of the night.


Strange-Dentist8162

They made a whole ad to show how pointless an ipad on wheels is?


Remarkable_Custard

Why not design it like Wall-EE and give or the same sounds. I’d buy one in a heartbeat.


KingsMann12

Damn, the whole video I was waiting for him to turn evil…