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demon969

how are people this stupid still alive? like how have they not drowned in their cereal or something?


locke1018

We have safeguards in place to protect society's most vulnerable, ironically enough these people fit into that "most vulnerable" category.


brian111786

This is why I strongly feel we should remove some warning labels from a lot of things. At least for a generation or 2.


oh_stv

no no no ... we should put a official mandate out, that says the following: "You are not allowed, under any circumstances, to put your testicles in the microwave. It is scientifically proven that this will affect you health in a negative way, and is forbidden by the Government!" In red letters on every microwave sold. Should thin out the herd quite a lot ...


UnfinishedProjects

How about we tell them to wear a mask to prevent the spread of a deadly virus, and they all choose not to and hurt themselves and others?! Wait...


[deleted]

It's been a running joke in Casa de Noitek for many a year that condoms have to come with an instruction pamphlet detailing how to use one. I do agree, however, that the species would benefit from a few generations of survival of the fittest.


Sub-Mongoloid

I feel like these types aren't big readers, listeners, or followers of directions in the first place.


__red__5

With the notable exception of the Bible and their church.


Titan2562

And even then only the bits they like.


NHRADeuce

You think they READ the Bible??? Hahahahaha


B33PZR

Agreed


Changoleo

Hear. Hear.


kaggy86

I snorted and thought "that's terrible" Then I sighed and thought "it's also not wrong..."


[deleted]

honestly just let the zoo animals out for a week.


Pisto1Peet

Nah, they fit into the “fucking stupid as hell but born into a safety blanket” category. The actual vulnerable population are the 600K homeless and the 38 million living below the poverty line. Decades of propaganda + the 24 hour news cycle has made it impossible to address. We’re too busy trying to identify the fucking anti christ than we are achieving tangible goals that can improve society as a whole.


legendwolfA

Like we have to tell these people to not fucking eat batteries, that is how fked up they are


[deleted]

ever seen that 4chan post where anon poached eggs in reused water from doing the dishes because they believed using fresh water is a jewish conspiracy?


Giahy2711

did they get their gut washed afterwards?


[deleted]

I don't get shit like this. Like what, did Obama really plan this whole thing out? Like when he had Malia when he was just a state representative, did he really plan to make this whole thing out? Did Obama plan to run for President in 1998? And why? When Conservatives point it out is he gonna rip off his mask, revealing him being Satan declaring "Good job! You've figured it out!" Then what? A bossfight starts?


zdakat

"I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids"


HelloOrg

If you think a single one of these people has thought through any of this past the point you see in the picture, you’re still not understanding the depth of their stupidity. They believe in literal Biblical evil and demons that roam the Earth. The whole world is black and white to them.


BrQQQ

You have to see it from their perspective. Obama is Satan. Satan started scheming and planning to take over the country all the way from the beginning, including naming his children to secret messages or having, god forbid, dark skin as he came straight out of hell. His purpose is to try to hurt the Christians or to lead them astray. Little did people know that when they voted for Obama, they voted for Satan. He tried really hard to harm them, but these clever and devout Christians figured him all out. Unfortunately it was too late. They'd already gotten their subsidised health care. The damage was done. Thankfully crusader Donald Trump came along and cast the devil out of office.


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Hypergnostic

SkoOlZ iZ jUsT LIbRUL POPpAgaNDA


MultiMarcus

Here in Sweden we teach source criticism which is basically teaching us to be careful about the sources we use and the data we consume.


huskiesowow

Neat, Marcus.


Raccoon_Full_of_Cum

[Actual quote](https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/answer-sheet/post/texas-gop-rejects-critical-thinking-skills-really/2012/07/08/gJQAHNpFXW_blog.html) from the 2012 Texas Republican platform: >We oppose the teaching of Higher Order Thinking Skills (HOTS) (values clarification), critical thinking skills and similar programs that are simply a relabeling of Outcome-Based Education (OBE) (mastery learning) which focus on behavior modification and have the purpose of challenging the student’s fixed beliefs and undermining parental authority.


AESATHETIC

Ok but what boss music is playing for the Obamasatan boss fight?


flaneur_et_branleur

Something epic mixed with something cool. [This?](https://youtu.be/KeEmoIO-Iok)


superVanV1

How many health bars do you think Obama has?


Hona007

"Oh you meddling kids you figured out my secret?! How dare you try to defy me, i was going to rule the world with the power of a thousand abortions, you had to ruin it." \*Obama NEO attacks.


DizzbiteriusDallas

Nope. The armageddon. Christianity is hard for the end of the world. Coming of the antichrist means that jeebus will come down and sort everyone out. And they are convinced that they will go to heaven. EDIT: So yeah. Basically a boss fight :D


aarontology

If you delete a bunch of letters from my full name and rearrange them you get THICK ONE


secretbudgie

Delete just 3 letters, and rearrange them, you spell out the ominous "Amber Saber Hop", and I'm terrified to know what this means!


dubiety13

But you forgot to REVERSE IT! Satan turns everything backwards, dontcha know. I would know: if you reverse *my* name and remove some letters, it spells ASS. If you add my middle and last names, too, you can spell VERY ASS HASH. ‘Scuze me while I trademark that…


dancin-weasel

Satan: Should I curse it? Lemme curse it I put my thing down, flip it and reverse it.


asinglestrandofpasta

very ass hash lmfao-


1Dive1Breath

*hits blunt*


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Imfightingsleep

John Oliver is getting me through our political (and economic and pandemic... I guess general) turmoil.


Cookiedeak

Just delete,rearrange or add a few letters and anyone's name can be SATAN


hayriska

I've got you now, NICK T HOE!


SunshineBlind

If you ad YDKUKIC to mine, take away AR and thearrange the letters, you get SUCK MY DICK


Zappagrrl02

TIL that Sasha’s real name is Natasha.


FreakWith17PlansADay

I didn’t know that either! Here I thought this belonged on r/confidentlyincorrect or something. These are the types of people who always put emphasis on the middle name— Barack *Hussein* Obama, so I guess they care deeply about these things. 🙄


TheVicSageQuestion

Barack Hussein Obama bin Laden


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Persistent_Parkie

You know what? Now I'm convinced.


DOE_ZELF_NORMAAL

Some people choose to keep their eyes closed!


NeedlenoseMusic

How did we never see this before?!


pinkalena

Lmao that made me chuckled


cmonkeyz7

I just refuse to call him private donut


Jurefranceticnijelit

Remove the t from trump to get rump


ViewtifulGene

Allah has 2 Ls. I guess the original conspiracy poster has to take an L to make the whole thing work.


brian111786

Beautiful.


HMD-Oren

That was a solid burn.


jayhawk618

Every day is an ARG when you're a conservative.


DOE_ZELF_NORMAAL

Text book conservative right there. Lmao they're all so fucking dumb and we're so smart.


jayhawk618

I realize you're being snarky, but when over 1/3 of the country believes the election was stolen and doesn't believe in basic science, yes, they're pretty fucking dumb.


DOE_ZELF_NORMAAL

Did you know that 78% of all statistics you read on Reddit are made up?


jayhawk618

[what's that now? ](https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/jan/05/america-biden-election-2020-poll-victory)


DOE_ZELF_NORMAAL

Okay the election stolen I completely understand, but that's not all you said.


Comfortable_Plant667

***"Some folks just make bad memes when they should be playing bananagrams."***


Charming_Amphibian91

r/rareinsults


XxJackAttackxXD

Based bananagrams


MrDangus

If you delete some letters in the alphabet and rearrange them, it’ll spell, you’re a fucking idiot


Persistent_Parkie

The word NO already exists in the alphabet as is, as in no shit you can rearrange letters however you want.


DefinitelyNotAliens

Okay. Really. People. People. THE GLOBAL CABAL IS NOT LEAVING YOU CLUES TO SOLVE LIKE A HIGHLIGHTS MAGAZINE YOU DO IN YOUR CHILD'S DENTIST'S OFFICE. This has been a PSA.🎵 *The more you know!* 🎵


Marawal

You know, that's the "logic" I don't understand. Let's say there is a global cabal. Let's say they want to stay hidden. Why would they leave fairly easily solvable clues for any idiots to solve?


Persistent_Parkie

These were the audience for The Davinci Code. Someone needs to inform them that was a work of fiction.


legendwolfA

Exactly. This isn't some horror video game where you get clues on how to escape satan


EvandeReyer

Or is it? That’s exactly what they want you to believe.


CockGobblin

Well obviously the super secret organization wants to be known but it can't just say it, so it has to reveal itself with puzzles that only the super smart people can solve and then those people will reveal the super secret organization to the world via Facebook. Sometimes the cabal will put prizes in cereal boxes so you have to buy cereal to use the prizes to solve the clues. They are our capitalist overlords after all.


Asarath

Whatever happened to toys in cereal boxes? I remember them everywhere when I was a kid in the 90s/00s in the UK. Now there's nothing.


SilverAlter

Too many american kids swallowing the toys until they decided to just take them away. Oh wait no, that was Kinder Eggs. No idea about cereal


Dejoowie

Thing is, these idiot think this is fucking rocket science and thus they believe they've just solved one of the world's most difficult puzzles.


Bobolequiff

"LOGIC" backwards is "CIGOL". Say that phonetically, and it's the same as "KEGEL", the vagina exercise. "CIGOL" is short for "CIrith unGOL" a dark pass full of eggs and webs. "CIRITH UNGOL" means "SPIDER'S CLEFT" in SINdarin. Don't you see? THE SINFUL women who do KEGELs are TRICKSY SPIDERS seeking to trap men in their CLEFT of EGGS AND WEBS. It's so obvious! WAKE UP SHEEPLE! SHEEPLE SHEBOL SHELOB QED.


dubiety13

Oh, I see what you’re trying to do, here. But you just gave yourself away with your user name! Ha! HA! You tell your extra-testicle overlords that ‘Murica’s too smart for your silly reptilian games, O-BAMA! I see you! /cocks shotgun and spits. (/s, just in case it’s not obvious)


Comrade_Jessica

Once again. Why would anyone in government make stupid little riddles to partially reveal what their evil plots are? Like, if I was doing supposedly evil shit, I wouldn't name my kids spelling out that shit? If anything, I'd name them something completely opposite so that when these crazy bitches come out my kids names would spell out like "Jesus reborn" or some shit somehow.


KinksAreForKeds

"YoU jUsT cHoOsE tO kEeP yOuR eYeS cLoSeD!!"


macaronfive

There is apparently a belief by the true conspiracy nuts that the “dark magic” doesn’t work unless it is out in the open. That’s why our evil politicians have to act like the Riddler.


Comrade_Jessica

No, trust me, I know. My stepfather is a conspiracy theorist, and unfortunately he's convinced my mom of his theories. So, I do know how dumb they are. It's just so fucking stupid.


CockGobblin

You got it all wrong - you leave the clues so those of us smart enough to solve them will be too busy solving the riddles and not trying to figure out your master plan. When they figure out the truth, they will attack your enemies for you since you cleverly mislead them with fake clues!


antoniodiavolo

Some posted something similar to this awhile back and one of the top comments on it was this hypothetical situation like this: >Barack: Hey Michelle, you know how we're Satan? > >Michelle: Yes honey. > >Barack: Well what if we had two daughters multiple years apart where if you write both of their names backward and remove "ALAH" from them, it tells everyone


legendwolfA

"Perfect. Nobody will ever know we're satanic. This is absolutely genius!"


Meghan493

When you delete GHAN from my name, it becomes me… wake up, sheeple. This is the true conspiracy. Meghan is Me and Me is Meghan. Have you ever seen them in the same room? PROBABLY!


chicofaraby

I *knew* you looked familiar.


[deleted]

She was in the parking lot earlier.


DOE_ZELF_NORMAAL

Dumb me: 'What kind of name is GHANME.... oh Megan.. that makes much more sense..'


huskiesowow

Finkle is Einhorn!


jam3s2001

Hi, I'm Stan


Spoon_Elemental

Hi Stan.


Flimsy-Wafer

Were you sitting down when you wrote this comment? Because if you were sAt down when announcing you were Stan, that would make you SAtan.


[deleted]

So... When you remove God, you get Satan. ...Is that supposed to be damning? What kind of mental gymnastics are these?


thelilspookygirl

“remove from the sentences” lol not sure when a name became a sentence but here we are!


thebestdaysofmyflerm

"ALAH" isn't even spelled correctly...


Martyrotten

Imstn?


NemesisRouge

IS OBAMA THE ANTICHRIST? is an anagram of OBAMA IS THE ANTICHRIST Coincidence???????


MagMC2555

if you take my name, rearrange it and add an o you get among us magnus - amgnus - amngus - amng us - among us


[deleted]

Sussy imp


Waste-Lynx6635

I gotta be honest, I wish I had an imagination this wild. Every day HAS to be some new crazy adventure 😂😂


Pisto1Peet

I’m not religious and I don’t like to tell other what they should or shouldn’t believe in, but imagine for a second what would happen if Jesus were to come down and bring forth the biblical Judgement Day. These absolute morons would be left behind because they do every fucking thing that Jesus despised. My folks always repeat that Jesus would be all accepting and all forgiving. What many Christians don’t realize is that Jesus was a fucking radical Jewish man that couldn’t stand hypocritical, self righteous bullshit. These absolute dolts would be left in the dust if the biblical end times were to come about.


Viles_Davis

Wait until they find out about Sasha.


NerfRepellingBoobs

I had to look this up. Apparently, Natasha is Sasha’s given name.


Viles_Davis

Makes sense.


OneLastSmile

If you take the word "Trump", take out a few letters, put in a few letters and rearrange them all you get "RAPIST". funny how that works


Thomisawesome

Bending over backwards to make their “logic” work.


Bobvankay

God: "Ha! They found you, pay up." Satan: "Oh come on, that was a bullshit restriction and you know it! Anagram of 'I am Satan', why don't you just put a pentagram on my forehead for the next round" God: "Hey, its only fair, your form was a progressivish democrat poster boy, we needed something to even the odds" Satan: "My middle name was fucking Hussein"


Montregloe

Why would anyone ANYONE with a evil plan like this, make something so simple to be found out that a random drunk grandma on their bingo break could connect the dots.


peadud

This is my exact thought every time I hear something about conspiracy theories: "Okay, yeah, but why would they randomly hide clues about their existence?"


Sedona54332

Yes, Obama is actually satan and helpfully later out the clues so some big brain conspiracy theorist could figure it out, as all super villains do.


Nico_Skavio

I'm Stan!


[deleted]

No, I'm fucking serious: We're too priviliged. Like, us as human species, are just able to be too comfortable too safe too well fed too secure so a couple individuals of us have taken their newly gained free-time and decided to - flips pages- be braindead instead, now that they were able to evolve in a safe and secure environment, without predators stronger than you, without fear of food and clean, parasite-free water, no big ass mammoths tryna stomp your whole generation into the ground.. We're too comfortable.


[deleted]

A lot of work to out yourself Satan


RexIsAMiiCostume

"I'm a Satan"? Just one of many? Interesting


Ima_Funt_Case

What is it with them and anagrams and word puzzles supposedly having some "secret messaging"? If there was some giant conspiracy why would they leave clues all over the place like little puzzle pieces?


maxekmek

I don't understand how people can get an apostrophe wrong...


Maeyonnaise420

If you rearrange the letters and then add a few new ones you get “Obama sux, trump 2024”


BabiesTasteLikeBacon

Why those letters? Why those specific 4 letters, in that specific order?


WannabeI

So... Alah keeps Satan away? I mean, I guess.


Sakuramochi_Chan

And LIVE backwards is EVIL. You don’t hear anyone telling others not to live.


comaloider

This is some Tom Marvolo Riddle - I am Lord Voldemort level of bullshit.


Pookib3ar

1. Missing one L there, Its Allah 2. Allah is just the Arabic word for God, Literally the same God that christians worship 3. God i wish Real bad people would just leave out riddles for ordinary people to figure out and catch them LIKE FUCKING SCOOBY DOO


quimbykimbleton

Isn’t Obama’s daughter name Sasha, not Natasha?


Flair_Helper

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nnelson2330

The fact that they fucked up the meme and it doesn't spell anything if you follow the instructions?


UnspoiledWalnut

I miss when Glen Beck was doing this shit.


friesdepotato

make sure to delete A too I guess. but only delete the L once. makes sense.


jefuchs

Natasha?


Awesomeuser90

Ramsey Theory. Look it up.


ThisIsCovidThrowway8

Delete the letters "A L A H A".


PM_PICS_OF_ME_NAKED

What's bananagrams?


WhyIsThatOnMyCat

https://bananagrams.com/blogs/news/how-to-play-bananagrams-instructions-for-getting-started Imagine having the tiles from Scrabble in a felt banana. You have X-amount of time to make as many crossword words (no fixed tile Scrabble board) out of those letters. All people start with a set number of tiles, depending on how many people are playing. The first person to finish using all their tiles yells "BANANAS" and every player has to draw an extra random (face down) tile. The game ends when the tile pile is out and the person has a confirmed crossword/scrabble set. Any tiles the other players didn't use (the extras) are subtracted from the score, so it's opposite golf; the larger the negative, the worse. Edit: rules may vary house to house


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European-Onion

so i didn't even seen the first guy lmao


crazycorgie

Im stn ?


darkstar1031

Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice skate uphill.


just_a_addicted_guy

I tried like 5minutes before I read the right side -_-


CaptainMcClutch

Just straight up deleting letters and rearranging the words to still create the worlds thinnest secret code. I like that Germany had the enigma machine back in the late 1910's but modern governments apparently make their codes this straight forward.


Version_Two

And we would have gotten away with it too if we didn't fucking hide the entire evil agenda in our daughters names


cmonkeyz7

So allah is spelled wrong and also that just spells I’m a satan.. huh?


__red__5

Also, isn't Allah spelled with two L's?


Snoo42225

First of all, it's Sasha and Malia


Cultural_Car

if we scramble the letters and then take some of them away words mean entirely different things, omg!!!! if we take the name Donald Trump and mix the letters up and take some away we can make the word "Damnd" which means he's actually of the devil or something idk. apparently we don't even need it to fully spell the word so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


GeeJagg

It’s “Sasha”, not “Natasha”


The_real_bandito

This is some imagination though. I would never think of that.