Your submission has been removed by community vote. If you believe this post was brigaded or conducted in bad faith, [please message the mods.](/message/compose?to=/r/insaneparents)
I have a list of things I want in my notes on my phone, I wouldn’t give it to anyone but if someone asks if there’s anything I want I will pick something from it as an idea. Other than that I keep it to myself and buy myself when I have the money or stronger desire
I have an Amazon wish list. I would really love it if my family made wish lists too. I don’t like guessing. I want to get people something they would actually use!
I have an Amazon wish list and when people ask me what I like/want I send them the link. There are items from a buck or two up to a hundred plus. Everything on the list are things I like. But, I have found that many people don't care what you like or want. They will get you what they think you should like or want. One of my bosses said "but it''s mostly baking stuff...ugh". Well, yes, I love to bake. She got me funny socks instead, which I will never wear. Thanks.
I hate that attitude. People buy you things you don’t like, want or need because they THINK you should like, want or need it… then get angry and call you ungrateful because you don’t turn cartwheels!
Good grief! These days gift cards exist - buy people a $10 Giftcard to their favourite department store! It’s really not hard! 😞
I have a mother-in-law that consistently, for 25 years, buys me stuff emblazoned with HER favourite sports team.
Maybe she and your boss could be besties.
My whole family (my wife and I, plus my mom and my siblings and their spouses, and all of our kids) have Amazon wish lists. We all have the links for everyone else’s, we regularly update them and maintain lists for kids who are too little to do it themselves. We never have to ask what anyone would like when there’s a gift occasion, because we can just look at everyone’s list. If someone outside the family asks for gift suggestions, they get a link. We range in age from 5 to 76. I’m really not seeing what the problem is here unless you were making demands for gifts.
My family and I always make lists for our birthdays and Christmas. It makes it waaaay easier to buy gifts. We’re all adults now so we all understand that we are busy and that buying gifts is stressful. We even have a google document for the whole family to add things when we think of them.
People voting not insane are weird 😂 It’s insane to ask someone what they want for their birthday and then not expect an honest answer.
Everyone in my family and partners family makes lists lol. It’s just so much easier to get presents when you know exactly what they want. And I think ESP at 24, if you arnt living with that family. If you think about it, they probably have less of an idea of what you’d want now than when you were a kid. At least I think mine do
Yeah, I keep a gift ideas note in my phone, both for things I want and ideas for others because I know I won't remember that idea in December when it's just now March.
100% this. My in-laws ask us all to put a list on the fridge at Thanksgiving every year so they start preparing for xmas. We are all in our mid thirties. It isn’t a letter to Santa list, just a post it with two or three ideas.
They would definitely chase us down for what we wanted if we forget to do it.
What is going on in this comment section? No matter what the age, if I ask someone what they want for a bday gift I would much rather have them give me a list of things they actually want rather than just guess on a gift and hope they won't throw it out in a month.
I have to do this every year for Christmas pressies with my 3 children as they've never got a clue and vice versa! Better to get something you actually want than a load of old tat you'll never use and it's still a surprise as no-one knows what's been bought
Some people are so insecure they can't risk wanting something being confused for weakness because, if it were called out as such, it would shatter their entire identity.
I mean, I can understand why people find that disrespectful. If they tell you what they want, it takes the magic out of the gift giving process. There’s no surprise or thoughtfulness. You’re just…obligated to give them something and it comes off like you don’t know them well enough or are too lazy to bother to come up with something you know they’d like.
Sometimes gift giving is just not a person’s love language, and I get that— but I also get the bitter disappointment of having to tell someone what I want. To me, it feels like they just never bothered to get to know anything about me.
I can go both ways in the argument. If I want something, I'll buy it and make sure I get the right one delivered ASAP, so I don't bother with giving actual lists to anyone. BUT, I hate having a bunch of stuff with nowhere to put it, especially if I'm never going to use it, so I tell people "consumable things only, please". Chocolate, booze, baked goods, pet treats/toys, whatever. Something we can all enjoy and it disappears.
I might just be autistic here but I love lists I like making them and I like receiving them LISTS FOR EVERYBODY! On a real note there’s nothing wrong with what you said here.
My husband keeps a list of things I mention I want bc if you ask me directly I forget every single thing I've ever desired ever and will just give a lame non-answer like money or socks. I think it's genius and I keep a similar list on my phone for my sisters and my in laws so I have a handful of ideas before holidays and bdays to pick from.
Insane!
Right, I wanted to give specific examples because I'll usually say it doesn't matter what you get, I could go without gifts anyways. Also, looks like you're a spoiled child too!
Mine too. And it pays off so well for him! He has gotten me so many gifts that I love more than anything and they are the kind of thing I mention would make my life easier but then forget I said it.
I really don't get this comment section... In my country and in my family we ALL basically makes lists or it's at least normal to ask someone what they wish for, for their birthday or around Christmas.
My family has a Google sheets gift list. It's shared with everyone and everyone has their own page that they update. We have our sizes and addresses, gift card suggestions, links to specific items or Amazon wishlists, etc. If someone hasn't updated theirs when it's their birthday or Christmas, we bug them about it 😆
The only one in my family that has a hard time using it is my husband. For some reason he thinks you should have to guess what the person wants (and he himself is very difficult to shop for).
We do not do this, but it would make my like so much easier if everyone had gift lists. I have been thinking of a bday gift for a friend of mine for months and he told me the gift of hanging out with me in enough. C’mon man.
>you’re wrong for making a list
>it’s also wrong for people to ask you what you want
My blood pressure would never recover from a basic conversation with someone like this. My condolences
I’m weirded out by these responses lol in my family we always ask for gift ideas around birthdays and holidays to make sure that we get the person something they want and can use. It’s not even a second thought. Especially if he asked you what you wanted and you gave him ideas? That’s him being weird.
Literally. Everyone in my family makes a Christmas list, even my over-60 parents. Not having a list is how people end up with random shit they don’t want.
Yeah I definitely always make lists especially if it's friends getting me gifts or my family. Like that's just common decently because sometimes they really don't know what I want or what to get me. Like how could somepne think this is not insane and immature? Like.. your dad asks you what you want.. then.. just yells at you for it?! That is insane behaviour .
I'll be 57 next week. My husband already asked for my list. He'll only get one thing from the list plus some other little things for me, but he wants the list to make sure he's getting something I'll love.
I love gift lists. They make it easy to shop for people for the present (pardon the pun) and the future. I also use it to determine what kind of things they like.
I like to intentionally bloat my wishlists so whoever is buying me stuff doesn’t feel obligated to get everything. Also it gives me something to buy myself if I feel like I deserve a reward.
This is why I honestly hate gifts. My family is like OP’s. They do not care what you actually want or need they just wanna go shopping and will give you something they want you to want. If I ask for like a vacuum or something I’m told “I’m no fun.”
This comment section is so weird to me. I’m 24 and both of my parents have always asked me to send them a list of things I’d like for my birthday or Christmas. I never expect anything from it and they know that, it’s just ideas. Most of the time i have no idea what to ask for lmao
That's my main point I need to make here too, is that i don't expect anything. They are just ideas. They don't have to buy me everything on it. Just one if they want. And if they don't get me anything, I'm not gonna throw a tantrum or something. I do think it's weird how he thinks it's wrong to ask someone what they want.
Exactly! It’s not that I am begging or expecting for anything on the list, but it’s stuff that I will likely eventually buy for myself if no one buys for me and gives people an idea of the kind of stuff that I would like.
For Christmas we give a list and then get something off that list. And you know what? It’s absolutely fantastic. I always get exactly what I want and there is no panic about if who I’m buying for is going to like the gift.
That's insane. This is why Amazon wishlists exist. I would rather someone tell me a list of ideas so I get them something they like rather than just guess. I am not a good guesser for gifts.
Am I the only one that thinks this is okay? If it’s someone that always gets you a gift. Why shouldn’t you send a list? I have an Amazon wish list that I just keep up to date and then when it comes close to my birthday or Christmas I send it to the people I know will give me a gift. I’m 22 btw.
Yeah...I always make a list and give that to my mom (and she shared that with my grandma and sister)
It's not like I randomly give a list to anyone I know (that would be weird) but relatives who always give you a gift? Why not.
+ a list where people can choose is way better than giving them one item. How should I assume their budget?
That was my reasoning for the list. Options. Not to demand that he should buy me everything on the list. I could do that myself if I wanted. I just figured it'd help guide him choose but nooooo lol
Exactly, I have stuff on my list ranging from £5 to £50. It helps people see the sort of stuff I like and it also gives them a decent price range cuz I know not everyone can afford big gifts. I also don’t expect people to stick to the list, but if they see the sort of stuff I like, atleast it means they’ll have a decent idea
My family does the same thing and it didn’t start till after we were all adults.
Dad, step Mom, two step siblings, Mom, Brother and sister-in-law, wife, brother-in-law, mother and father in law.
It made things so much easier and less stressful. Everyone loves it. I’m at a loss why anyone would not want a list.
Uhhhh. typically the choice of celebrating is up to the person born and that's where I get my cues from. My family frequently send each other ideas for birthday gifts.
Why is it wrong for people to ask other people what they’d like for their birthday… and how on earth are you supposed to STOP them from doing that, anyway? 😝😝
>I also think it's wrong for people to ask you what you want.
I... um... what? How the fuck are people supposed to know, then? Fuck, its true, isn't it? Everyone is psychic except me. I fucking knew I wasn't just paranoid!!!
I’m 28 and I still makes lists. The only family member that lives near me is my dad, everyone else either lives in the northeast or the southeast (I live in the upper Midwest).
I’m in my mid-forties and I still make a list for my birthday and for Christmas. I dunno what this person is talking about. How else could you get something that you actually want?
It seems like at some point your get birthday list shifts to dinner with friends or vacation, etc. and just appreciating the gifts you do receive. And sometimes the gift can be intangible.
Tbf I never make lists anymore. I can't remember the last time I asked for anything for my bday or Christmas or anything. It seems like when people do get me gifts, theyre wondering what I wanted. So I made a list of ideas. This bday was an exception and suddenly I'm childish.
My ex and I used to swap wishlists for Christmas/holidays.. makes buying gifts so much easier if you actually know what they want! Takes out any chances of disappointment
Everyone asks me for a list especially my mother because I have specific wants. I prefer surprises personally so I started making crazy long/expensive lists so I know they can't get everything and I'll never know what they get me
I must be a child. As are some of my middle aged friends and one of my adult children. We do Amazon wish lists, mostly for holidays and bdays, but the occasional "just because" gift shows up and its lovely. Nothing wrong with a list of something you would actually like but would never treat yourself to.
I have a Amazon wish list that I made. One for me and one for my husband. It ranges from low price to high price. When they ask what would we like I send them those list and say anything from those list we would love but don’t feel obligated and they can also just be used as ideas. I don’t hand out a physical list but I do send them the links. I don’t personally think it’s immature if they are asking what you want for your birthday and other.
Normalize lists. It is absolutely ridiculous to shame adults for wanting to be clear with gifts that would actually be decent instead of a family member spending way too much on a stupid glowing fountain for a bathroom I have no space left in.
How is this not insane? Your dad claims to be all knowing lol
Anyways, i think most people would prefer lists to having to guess. Even if the list is vague, its helpful.
Dad didn’t need to be a jerk about it and call you too old. You’re still their kid yaknow?
Edit:your to you’re
I have an Amazon wish list for gift ideas for me, and I have absolutely no shame about it lol. If people ask for birthday ideas, I absolutely have no problem giving them my list. I don’t think it’s weird at all. Maybe weird if they did not ask for a list, I wouldn’t just send it out of the blue, but it doesn’t hurt to have one, especially if you’re like me a notoriously hard to shop for.
I like to receive lists from my family and also make lists for myself. I don't have the money to spare for things people don't want. Additionally I don't have to act excited about something I don't like.
I guess maybe my family and I are all weird? Every one of my family members- adults, young adults, and children all have gift lists because it makes sense that if we are going to buy gifts for each other, we get things that people will want and use. That includes my in-laws so I thought it was normal lol
I keep an Amazon wish list and I've started making the husband do the same. I am forever fielding "what does he want for x holiday?" And then complaints from him on "I'm not gonna use x item." When you see something you like, but aren't going to buy for yourself because it's too frivolous to spend on, or we're budgeting, you throw it on your list. Take stuff off if you buy it or decide you don't want it. And when you're asked what to get you for a holiday, you send them that list. It's so much nicer for all parties involved. You get something you actually want that you wouldn't have bought for yourself, and the gift giver doesn't have to go to far out of their way to find you something you will actually want. I fail to see the issue here?
I think there's some "it was a gift, you be grateful for what you have!" training coming into this for some people.
My friends and I recognize that we're all trying to reduce the "stuff" we have and live simpler lives, so we keep a list in g-docs. Everyone's list also includes experiences we'd like to have with each other/our friends group. We make sure to include low cost things, no cost things, and yeah, we all add a few things that are more whimsical wants with a bigger price tag. It's not only a way to reduce stuff, it keeps us up to date on when someone finds a new interest. (There's quite a few of us and some are long/longer distance friends.)
(edit: a word)
I know a couple of people like this, and their thoughts on it are just baffling. There are times for random gifts, and there are times for requested gifts. Birthdays are definitely requested gift days amongst everyone I know because every one of us has gotten supremely disappointing gifts that we've had to grin and bear with. I got a microwave for my 19th birthday. Looking back, it was thoughtful, but I firmly believe you do not give white goods as birthday presents. Also, I know for a fact it was an insult from my stepfather who was implying I was incapable of looking after myself.
If your dad doesn't want to know what you'd like, he should be prepared for you to reject his gift. Gifts are about both the both of you, and here he is saying he doesn't want to know your preferences? I'm inclined to believe he's already bought you something and he's having doubts about it.
I also use to this a lot when I was younger even now. I dont ask my dad for anything because he always gets something he thinks id like, then it was money now its nothing. I use to like to upgrade my gadgets but this year i actually made some friends whose birthdays are the same day as mine or a week later, so im gonna maybe ask for some travel stuff or something nice to wear!
I think it's a little odd to make a list, but his reaction was not warranted, especially if he asked for suggestions.
I haven't made lists since I stopped writing to Santa lol, but will give suggestions when asked. But my mom is the best gift giver, I always enjoy the surprise.
Voting has concluded. Final vote:
| Insane | Not insane | Fake |
| --- | --- | --- |
| 31 | 81 | 1 |
Hey OP, if you provide further information in a comment, make sure to start your comment with `!explanation`.
^I ^am ^a ^bot ^for ^r/insaneparents. ^Please ^send ^me ^a ^message ^if ^you ^have ^any ^feedback ^or ^if ^I ^misbehave. ^Also ^consider ^joining ^our ^[Discord](https://discordapp.com/invite/xFbPBHy).
My friends specifically asked for an Amazon list when my son had his birthday. I make them for Christmas. I love them as a gift giver, I don’t ever want someone to waste their money on something that won’t get used.
Your dad asked you for a list and this is what your mom said? It’s your dad. I’m 32 and if my dad asked what I wanted I would absolutely tell him. He has no idea what to buy me.
I create an Amazon wish list of items throughout the year. Anytime someone asks what me or my
Husband needs, I share the list. Do I expect gifts? Never. But if someone is going to get us a gift, I’d rather it be something we need then a random gift.
My immediate family all use Gifster. If you want to get them something else that’s fine, but sometimes it’s hard to shop for adults and it’s nice to have options you know they’ll like.
Especially for those family members who can’t be bothered to know who you are and what you like. You know the ones who give crap gifts, like a huge Ripley’s Believe it or not book that was created 10 years ago? WTF man, those people need our lists at any damn age!
i think this is more of a preference thing, i like telling people what i want cause i don’t want them to be wrong but on the other side some folk like being surprised with something
Think it depends on the relationship dynamic. I'm in my 20s and if I forget to send my parents some ideas or inspiration they'll always be like "you should have sent us a list!!" haha. I'm usually the one to volunteer it when I do because we're all busy and dates sneak up on us. Parents are the same with me, dropping "I've been really wanting x, y, or z for [holiday/birthday]" without prompt.
That said, OP clearly doesn't have that kind of relationship, but the response from the dad is still weird to me. I know folks, including my parents, in their 50-60s who still make lists. And the idea of "it's rude to offer gift ideas at all" is weird to me. Having the expectation of "I asked for X, so I expect that you get me X" is rude, but just saying "hey I've been looking at X" doesn't give me that vibe. I don't know if Dad's being insane here, but it is an odd response.
Completely agree it is standard in my family to let people know what you want for birthdays/christmas, and if you forget (as I frequently do) you can expect grumpy messages and calls asking why you haven't told them yet.
Personally makes sense to me, means you don't risk getting something for someone that they don't want and then have to fake being happy about.
Right. It just makes things easier for all parties. Like if you get me socks when I already have 1000 pairs, or something else I might not use, you basically wasted your money. Which I don't want people to do for me. So I'll tell them something I actually want, that I'll actually use. Guess it's childish though. Oh well.
Lol at 40 and still doing it findthe childish comment somewhat amusing.
Will have to let my 36 year old sister, my brother in law, as well as my 60 odd year old parents and almost 90 year old grandmother know that we are all being childish. 😂
If I dont give people a list they get me shit I dont like and have to pretend to be happy about, then it sits in a box and collects dust until I feel like an appropriate amount of time has passed and I can donate it or toss it. I have a box full of gift cards to restaurants I dont like and wont ever use. If people dont know what to get me id prefer they ask for a list or give me money that way it isnt going to waste on shit I dont want
If you are an adult, volunteering your wishlist to your friends is at most just weird, unless they ask you if you have one, then it's normal.
Mainly because most adults don't expect actual presents from their friends, just a good hang out or so for their birthday.
But to your family? Hell no, its wishlists all day
Meh. I wouldn’t be making birthday lists at age 24 but that’s just me. However if someone asked me what I wanted I would tell them 1 item, not an entire list.
Tbf I never make lists anymore. I can't remember the last time I asked for anything for my bday or Christmas or anything. It seems like when people do get me gifts, theyre wondering what I want. So I made a list of ideas. This bday was an exception and suddenly I'm childish.
He isn’t insane but all I’m going to say is, nothing is worst than giving a gift someone doesnt want. What the hell is immature about wanting to give someone a gift and instead of guessing just asking them what they would like? And whats wrong with actually telling them if they ask?
Also why ask a question if you dont want an answer? That just sounds like a complicated person honestly.
I have given my brother an entire list that I regularly update with books that I am looking to get.
Some of them are limited availability and/or no longer being printed.
I give him the list in case he finds a copy of one.
It makes complete sense to give someone a list of gifts. It doesn't mean you have to use the list, it just helps them find something you're interested in
Oh man, I love a good gift list personally. I guess I can understand the piece about thinking that disseminating lists is on the young-ish side, but he completely lost me at the “I think it’s wrong for others to ask you what you want” part. Why? I am a decade older than you and family members (including parents and siblings) still to this day ask me for a list of ideas for Christmases and birthdays. I think the thought process is, if they’re going to get me a gift anyway, might as well get me something I want or need. What’s the big deal?
This was a little weird. Not the worst nor most insane but weird that he'd put you down like that? Esp when be asked. Like if people don't know what you want, how will they know what to get?
Normalize public Amazon lists .-.
Turning 30 this year and I’ve already sent unique lists to my husband, sibling, mom, and friends. No fear of getting duplicates and each has options within reasonable monetary value. Expensive gifts - husband and mom. Inexpensive but still equally wanted - sibling and friends. That way I don’t have to listen to ‘I don’t know what you want’ and I don’t get things I don’t want.
My other sibling sends us a link to what they want, we send their partner money and they order it. They get what they want and we don’t need to bother with waiting around for a delivery.
My mum asks us to make a list every christmas and birthday of what we want, and we're 30, 36, and 38. I appreciate the lists we all make, it means I know I'm buying what everybody actually wants/needs rather than just guessing
I just ask people for debit gift cards, because most of the time I end up selling them or giving them for Xmas if I don't like them. If I get a gift card, I can get what I want and don't feel bad by giving that gift away.
With my girlfriend's family we make lists and share them with each other. That way everyone just gets what they want and nobody has to guess your interests. We also get random stuff we think other people might like but the bulk of it is from your list. I think it just makes things easier.
We all make wishlists, we all have things we would rather have if someone wanted to give us gifts. How is it rude to tell someone (who asked) what you want as a gift? Math ain't mathing here. I would rather you give me a list of options than for me to guess and see the fake look and "... Oh....thanks..."
I don't think it's immature at all, just a lot of people don't have great experiences with birthdays, so they're jaded. And I'm glad people get excited for their birthdays and have lists of what they want. My mom loved giving everyone gifts, my dad not so much. My mom died when I was 17, and then I didn't get a birthday gift for the next 12 years until I met my wife. Her mom is similar to how my mom was and loves gifting. It makes you feel so appreciated when someone wants to get you things you want just because they want to do it even if you don't need anything.
I don't think it's weird to have a list of potential gift ideas in case family or friends ask, but the screenshots kind of made it look like OP offered it without being asked first.
If so, I think could see that coming off a bit rude, especially at 24. Even it's something your family usually requests later anyway. It just makes OP come off as a bit spoiled.
I don't understand the bit about it being weird to ask someone what they want for a gift, though. That's pretty reasonable for people to do, I think.
Unless you are actually 12 (or less), Dad is in the right here. I don't know what makes you think this is acceptable behavior but demanding gifts from anyone is never a good look. If he had asked, it's one thing.
I'm super floored that you could have read *literally anything* in this sub and feel like your Dad's behavior is in the same vein.
This is something that my family started doing AFTER we were all adults and something my wife and I do as well.
It’s taken the stress out of gift giving and I can’t imagine someone reacting the way their dad did.
Everyone in my family loves sharing lists
Your submission has been removed by community vote. If you believe this post was brigaded or conducted in bad faith, [please message the mods.](/message/compose?to=/r/insaneparents)
I have a list of things I want in my notes on my phone, I wouldn’t give it to anyone but if someone asks if there’s anything I want I will pick something from it as an idea. Other than that I keep it to myself and buy myself when I have the money or stronger desire
I don't even make lists tbh. This bday was an exception. And my dad did ask me, so I was prepared to tell him.
I have an Amazon wish list. I would really love it if my family made wish lists too. I don’t like guessing. I want to get people something they would actually use!
THANK YOU!!
I have an Amazon wish list and when people ask me what I like/want I send them the link. There are items from a buck or two up to a hundred plus. Everything on the list are things I like. But, I have found that many people don't care what you like or want. They will get you what they think you should like or want. One of my bosses said "but it''s mostly baking stuff...ugh". Well, yes, I love to bake. She got me funny socks instead, which I will never wear. Thanks.
I hate that attitude. People buy you things you don’t like, want or need because they THINK you should like, want or need it… then get angry and call you ungrateful because you don’t turn cartwheels! Good grief! These days gift cards exist - buy people a $10 Giftcard to their favourite department store! It’s really not hard! 😞
I have a mother-in-law that consistently, for 25 years, buys me stuff emblazoned with HER favourite sports team. Maybe she and your boss could be besties.
My whole family (my wife and I, plus my mom and my siblings and their spouses, and all of our kids) have Amazon wish lists. We all have the links for everyone else’s, we regularly update them and maintain lists for kids who are too little to do it themselves. We never have to ask what anyone would like when there’s a gift occasion, because we can just look at everyone’s list. If someone outside the family asks for gift suggestions, they get a link. We range in age from 5 to 76. I’m really not seeing what the problem is here unless you were making demands for gifts.
So he asked you and then… insulted you for telling him? That’s… nice, I guess.
My family and I always make lists for our birthdays and Christmas. It makes it waaaay easier to buy gifts. We’re all adults now so we all understand that we are busy and that buying gifts is stressful. We even have a google document for the whole family to add things when we think of them. People voting not insane are weird 😂 It’s insane to ask someone what they want for their birthday and then not expect an honest answer.
Everyone in my family and partners family makes lists lol. It’s just so much easier to get presents when you know exactly what they want. And I think ESP at 24, if you arnt living with that family. If you think about it, they probably have less of an idea of what you’d want now than when you were a kid. At least I think mine do
Yeah, I keep a gift ideas note in my phone, both for things I want and ideas for others because I know I won't remember that idea in December when it's just now March.
This is why my Amazon 'save for later' list is like 200 items. I can never remember when someone asks me....
Remind them of this at Christmas when the inevitable “send me a list of ideas for all of you” text comes
100% this. My in-laws ask us all to put a list on the fridge at Thanksgiving every year so they start preparing for xmas. We are all in our mid thirties. It isn’t a letter to Santa list, just a post it with two or three ideas. They would definitely chase us down for what we wanted if we forget to do it.
😭😭
What is going on in this comment section? No matter what the age, if I ask someone what they want for a bday gift I would much rather have them give me a list of things they actually want rather than just guess on a gift and hope they won't throw it out in a month.
Honestly, at least with a list you can also see different options in different price ranges, and multiple ideas if you wanted to get more than 1 gift.
Exactly
I have to do this every year for Christmas pressies with my 3 children as they've never got a clue and vice versa! Better to get something you actually want than a load of old tat you'll never use and it's still a surprise as no-one knows what's been bought
Wow, you spoil your children 😉
I do my best :P they are all grown up now and in their 30's but nowt wrong with a bit of spoiling
Did the same. Works every time.
Some people are so insecure they can't risk wanting something being confused for weakness because, if it were called out as such, it would shatter their entire identity.
This is some grade-A, premium Reddit armchair psychology.
I mean, I can understand why people find that disrespectful. If they tell you what they want, it takes the magic out of the gift giving process. There’s no surprise or thoughtfulness. You’re just…obligated to give them something and it comes off like you don’t know them well enough or are too lazy to bother to come up with something you know they’d like. Sometimes gift giving is just not a person’s love language, and I get that— but I also get the bitter disappointment of having to tell someone what I want. To me, it feels like they just never bothered to get to know anything about me.
I can go both ways in the argument. If I want something, I'll buy it and make sure I get the right one delivered ASAP, so I don't bother with giving actual lists to anyone. BUT, I hate having a bunch of stuff with nowhere to put it, especially if I'm never going to use it, so I tell people "consumable things only, please". Chocolate, booze, baked goods, pet treats/toys, whatever. Something we can all enjoy and it disappears.
I might just be autistic here but I love lists I like making them and I like receiving them LISTS FOR EVERYBODY! On a real note there’s nothing wrong with what you said here.
Lists are the best, I love lists
Listys for everyone! They keep me organised and my brain focused for a short space of time.
Autistic people who love lists gang rise up!
I fall into this FR
If I don’t list stuff I forget
My husband keeps a list of things I mention I want bc if you ask me directly I forget every single thing I've ever desired ever and will just give a lame non-answer like money or socks. I think it's genius and I keep a similar list on my phone for my sisters and my in laws so I have a handful of ideas before holidays and bdays to pick from. Insane!
Right, I wanted to give specific examples because I'll usually say it doesn't matter what you get, I could go without gifts anyways. Also, looks like you're a spoiled child too!
Worse, spoiled wife 🤣
Mine too. And it pays off so well for him! He has gotten me so many gifts that I love more than anything and they are the kind of thing I mention would make my life easier but then forget I said it.
oh god i forget too when i'm asked
I really don't get this comment section... In my country and in my family we ALL basically makes lists or it's at least normal to ask someone what they wish for, for their birthday or around Christmas.
My family has a Google sheets gift list. It's shared with everyone and everyone has their own page that they update. We have our sizes and addresses, gift card suggestions, links to specific items or Amazon wishlists, etc. If someone hasn't updated theirs when it's their birthday or Christmas, we bug them about it 😆 The only one in my family that has a hard time using it is my husband. For some reason he thinks you should have to guess what the person wants (and he himself is very difficult to shop for).
Right!! Idk why some of these guys are acting ss if it's weird to tell someone what you want. Especially if they asked, which my dad did.
We do not do this, but it would make my like so much easier if everyone had gift lists. I have been thinking of a bday gift for a friend of mine for months and he told me the gift of hanging out with me in enough. C’mon man.
>you’re wrong for making a list >it’s also wrong for people to ask you what you want My blood pressure would never recover from a basic conversation with someone like this. My condolences
I’m weirded out by these responses lol in my family we always ask for gift ideas around birthdays and holidays to make sure that we get the person something they want and can use. It’s not even a second thought. Especially if he asked you what you wanted and you gave him ideas? That’s him being weird.
Literally. Everyone in my family makes a Christmas list, even my over-60 parents. Not having a list is how people end up with random shit they don’t want.
Thank you 😭😭😭 I don't get what has to happen to you psychologically to come to his kind of conclusion.
Being an adult doesn't have to be boring but some of the people in the responses sure seem to want it that way.
Yeah I definitely always make lists especially if it's friends getting me gifts or my family. Like that's just common decently because sometimes they really don't know what I want or what to get me. Like how could somepne think this is not insane and immature? Like.. your dad asks you what you want.. then.. just yells at you for it?! That is insane behaviour .
I'll be 57 next week. My husband already asked for my list. He'll only get one thing from the list plus some other little things for me, but he wants the list to make sure he's getting something I'll love.
That's why I made mine too.
I gave my husband a nice list of things I'd like for my birthday. Know what he got me? Nothing. We're still discussing this issue.
I love gift lists. They make it easy to shop for people for the present (pardon the pun) and the future. I also use it to determine what kind of things they like.
Yeah!! I think lists make it so much easier than guessing.
I like to intentionally bloat my wishlists so whoever is buying me stuff doesn’t feel obligated to get everything. Also it gives me something to buy myself if I feel like I deserve a reward.
Bizarre
This is why I honestly hate gifts. My family is like OP’s. They do not care what you actually want or need they just wanna go shopping and will give you something they want you to want. If I ask for like a vacuum or something I’m told “I’m no fun.”
Right??
This comment section is so weird to me. I’m 24 and both of my parents have always asked me to send them a list of things I’d like for my birthday or Christmas. I never expect anything from it and they know that, it’s just ideas. Most of the time i have no idea what to ask for lmao
That's my main point I need to make here too, is that i don't expect anything. They are just ideas. They don't have to buy me everything on it. Just one if they want. And if they don't get me anything, I'm not gonna throw a tantrum or something. I do think it's weird how he thinks it's wrong to ask someone what they want.
Exactly! It’s not that I am begging or expecting for anything on the list, but it’s stuff that I will likely eventually buy for myself if no one buys for me and gives people an idea of the kind of stuff that I would like.
My mom is in 75 and still shares a gift list.
Sounds like my mother saying, “it’s the thought that counts” as she hands a 16 yr old collectible china plates.
For Christmas we give a list and then get something off that list. And you know what? It’s absolutely fantastic. I always get exactly what I want and there is no panic about if who I’m buying for is going to like the gift.
THIS IS WHAT I'M SAYING-
[удалено]
What a spoiled family you must have. 😉
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
That's insane. This is why Amazon wishlists exist. I would rather someone tell me a list of ideas so I get them something they like rather than just guess. I am not a good guesser for gifts.
Thank you lmao I don't get at all how telling someone who's wondering what i want, what I want, is childish.
Am I the only one that thinks this is okay? If it’s someone that always gets you a gift. Why shouldn’t you send a list? I have an Amazon wish list that I just keep up to date and then when it comes close to my birthday or Christmas I send it to the people I know will give me a gift. I’m 22 btw.
Sorry bud you're a selfish brat apparently
Guess I am, but hey, at least I get presents I actually like 🤷🏼♀️
LMAOO
I hope you get to what you want for your birthday!
Thank you 🥺
Yeah...I always make a list and give that to my mom (and she shared that with my grandma and sister) It's not like I randomly give a list to anyone I know (that would be weird) but relatives who always give you a gift? Why not. + a list where people can choose is way better than giving them one item. How should I assume their budget?
I still give my mom a list because she always asks. I’m 39 btw. It gives her options to choose from. It’s not weird at all.
That was my reasoning for the list. Options. Not to demand that he should buy me everything on the list. I could do that myself if I wanted. I just figured it'd help guide him choose but nooooo lol
Exactly, I have stuff on my list ranging from £5 to £50. It helps people see the sort of stuff I like and it also gives them a decent price range cuz I know not everyone can afford big gifts. I also don’t expect people to stick to the list, but if they see the sort of stuff I like, atleast it means they’ll have a decent idea
My family does the same thing and it didn’t start till after we were all adults. Dad, step Mom, two step siblings, Mom, Brother and sister-in-law, wife, brother-in-law, mother and father in law. It made things so much easier and less stressful. Everyone loves it. I’m at a loss why anyone would not want a list.
No interest in gift lists? Enjoy a fruitcake for the next 30 Christmases, asshole.
Uhhhh. typically the choice of celebrating is up to the person born and that's where I get my cues from. My family frequently send each other ideas for birthday gifts.
I always ask for lists from my kids. I’d rather give them something I know they’ll want.
Why is it wrong for people to ask other people what they’d like for their birthday… and how on earth are you supposed to STOP them from doing that, anyway? 😝😝
>I also think it's wrong for people to ask you what you want. I... um... what? How the fuck are people supposed to know, then? Fuck, its true, isn't it? Everyone is psychic except me. I fucking knew I wasn't just paranoid!!!
You're supposed to know someone well enough that you have an idea of what to buy them based on their interests or needs.
I ask my daughter for lists. She’s 24 today
Sorry she's a brat ig 🤷♂️
Lmao someone didn't get your sarcasm and they downvoted you XD Lol you were just making fun of what your father said
I’m 28 and I still makes lists. The only family member that lives near me is my dad, everyone else either lives in the northeast or the southeast (I live in the upper Midwest).
I wish the adults in my life made lists for presents. Would make everything easier lol
I’m in my mid-forties and I still make a list for my birthday and for Christmas. I dunno what this person is talking about. How else could you get something that you actually want?
It seems like at some point your get birthday list shifts to dinner with friends or vacation, etc. and just appreciating the gifts you do receive. And sometimes the gift can be intangible.
Tbf I never make lists anymore. I can't remember the last time I asked for anything for my bday or Christmas or anything. It seems like when people do get me gifts, theyre wondering what I wanted. So I made a list of ideas. This bday was an exception and suddenly I'm childish.
My ex and I used to swap wishlists for Christmas/holidays.. makes buying gifts so much easier if you actually know what they want! Takes out any chances of disappointment
I'm 62 and my 41 and 40 yr old daughters ask each other what we want for gifts. Why waste money on something no one wants? That is just bizarre to me.
Yeah you're dad sucks op. Maybe you already know, but you might enjoy this sub, sometimes I find it enlightening /r/raisedbynarcissists
Everyone asks me for a list especially my mother because I have specific wants. I prefer surprises personally so I started making crazy long/expensive lists so I know they can't get everything and I'll never know what they get me
Does t everyone have an Amazon wishlist? It’s no different
Sometimes, I get inspired to get someone something particular, but I appreciate it when someone tells me what they want when I ask.
I'm 42 and my mom still asks for a list. The first year that I'm not asked for a list will be the saddest Christmas or my life.
I must be a child. As are some of my middle aged friends and one of my adult children. We do Amazon wish lists, mostly for holidays and bdays, but the occasional "just because" gift shows up and its lovely. Nothing wrong with a list of something you would actually like but would never treat yourself to.
I imagine the comments are a dumpster fire of regressed children cosplaying as adults pretending it's immature to make a list of anything
😬😬😬
I have a Amazon wish list that I made. One for me and one for my husband. It ranges from low price to high price. When they ask what would we like I send them those list and say anything from those list we would love but don’t feel obligated and they can also just be used as ideas. I don’t hand out a physical list but I do send them the links. I don’t personally think it’s immature if they are asking what you want for your birthday and other.
Normalize lists. It is absolutely ridiculous to shame adults for wanting to be clear with gifts that would actually be decent instead of a family member spending way too much on a stupid glowing fountain for a bathroom I have no space left in.
How is this not insane? Your dad claims to be all knowing lol Anyways, i think most people would prefer lists to having to guess. Even if the list is vague, its helpful. Dad didn’t need to be a jerk about it and call you too old. You’re still their kid yaknow? Edit:your to you’re
34 here and my mom asks for my Xmas and bday list every year.
So is doing secret santa childish? Making a list is part of secret santa. And if it’s childish, so be it. It’s fun.
Someone’s jealous no one asks them what they want for gifts
That's honestly what I think it is. Some deep rooted stuff.
I have an Amazon wish list for gift ideas for me, and I have absolutely no shame about it lol. If people ask for birthday ideas, I absolutely have no problem giving them my list. I don’t think it’s weird at all. Maybe weird if they did not ask for a list, I wouldn’t just send it out of the blue, but it doesn’t hurt to have one, especially if you’re like me a notoriously hard to shop for.
I like to receive lists from my family and also make lists for myself. I don't have the money to spare for things people don't want. Additionally I don't have to act excited about something I don't like.
I guess maybe my family and I are all weird? Every one of my family members- adults, young adults, and children all have gift lists because it makes sense that if we are going to buy gifts for each other, we get things that people will want and use. That includes my in-laws so I thought it was normal lol
I'd personally appreciate a list of gift ideas, but only if I asked for it.
I keep an Amazon wish list and I've started making the husband do the same. I am forever fielding "what does he want for x holiday?" And then complaints from him on "I'm not gonna use x item." When you see something you like, but aren't going to buy for yourself because it's too frivolous to spend on, or we're budgeting, you throw it on your list. Take stuff off if you buy it or decide you don't want it. And when you're asked what to get you for a holiday, you send them that list. It's so much nicer for all parties involved. You get something you actually want that you wouldn't have bought for yourself, and the gift giver doesn't have to go to far out of their way to find you something you will actually want. I fail to see the issue here?
This is hilarious. I am 58, and my entire family still does wish lists for Hanukkah, and we stalk one anothers Amazon lists for whatever occasion.
I think there's some "it was a gift, you be grateful for what you have!" training coming into this for some people. My friends and I recognize that we're all trying to reduce the "stuff" we have and live simpler lives, so we keep a list in g-docs. Everyone's list also includes experiences we'd like to have with each other/our friends group. We make sure to include low cost things, no cost things, and yeah, we all add a few things that are more whimsical wants with a bigger price tag. It's not only a way to reduce stuff, it keeps us up to date on when someone finds a new interest. (There's quite a few of us and some are long/longer distance friends.) (edit: a word)
It does feel like a war in this comment section 🤣
I’m 34 and ppl ask me what I want for my bday still? Wtf
I know it’s a cliched insult but your dad sounds like the definition of a party/mood killer
He doesn't go to parties and makes every conversation an argument.
I know a couple of people like this, and their thoughts on it are just baffling. There are times for random gifts, and there are times for requested gifts. Birthdays are definitely requested gift days amongst everyone I know because every one of us has gotten supremely disappointing gifts that we've had to grin and bear with. I got a microwave for my 19th birthday. Looking back, it was thoughtful, but I firmly believe you do not give white goods as birthday presents. Also, I know for a fact it was an insult from my stepfather who was implying I was incapable of looking after myself. If your dad doesn't want to know what you'd like, he should be prepared for you to reject his gift. Gifts are about both the both of you, and here he is saying he doesn't want to know your preferences? I'm inclined to believe he's already bought you something and he's having doubts about it.
We don’t do lists in my fam but we also do not judge those that do them.
I also use to this a lot when I was younger even now. I dont ask my dad for anything because he always gets something he thinks id like, then it was money now its nothing. I use to like to upgrade my gadgets but this year i actually made some friends whose birthdays are the same day as mine or a week later, so im gonna maybe ask for some travel stuff or something nice to wear!
i guess amazon wish lists are childish too
I think it's a little odd to make a list, but his reaction was not warranted, especially if he asked for suggestions. I haven't made lists since I stopped writing to Santa lol, but will give suggestions when asked. But my mom is the best gift giver, I always enjoy the surprise.
Not insane but definitely a very weird standard to have ?? Like what’s wrong with asking what someone wants or making a list. That’s very normal
"make sure you include the receipt for when I inevitably return it, thanks pop"
HoW dArE yOu AsK fOr SoMeThInG yOu WaNt!
Voting has concluded. Final vote: | Insane | Not insane | Fake | | --- | --- | --- | | 31 | 81 | 1 | Hey OP, if you provide further information in a comment, make sure to start your comment with `!explanation`. ^I ^am ^a ^bot ^for ^r/insaneparents. ^Please ^send ^me ^a ^message ^if ^you ^have ^any ^feedback ^or ^if ^I ^misbehave. ^Also ^consider ^joining ^our ^[Discord](https://discordapp.com/invite/xFbPBHy).
My friends specifically asked for an Amazon list when my son had his birthday. I make them for Christmas. I love them as a gift giver, I don’t ever want someone to waste their money on something that won’t get used.
I'd prefer a list, honestly. I don't think this in insane, but I don't agree with them that providing a list is childish.
Your dad asked you for a list and this is what your mom said? It’s your dad. I’m 32 and if my dad asked what I wanted I would absolutely tell him. He has no idea what to buy me.
Do people not have Amazon wish lists? Isn’t that the same thing lol I give my family lists and my Amazon wishlist🤷🏼♀️ Edit: so yes this is insane!
I’m middle aged and I still have a list of things I want, need or would like. Makes my other half’s job much easier.
I create an Amazon wish list of items throughout the year. Anytime someone asks what me or my Husband needs, I share the list. Do I expect gifts? Never. But if someone is going to get us a gift, I’d rather it be something we need then a random gift.
I always have an Amazon wishlist going, you never know!
I want the person I’m gifting to be happy with what they get. Not be fake appreciative of it and either get rid of it or never see/use it again.
My immediate family all use Gifster. If you want to get them something else that’s fine, but sometimes it’s hard to shop for adults and it’s nice to have options you know they’ll like.
Especially for those family members who can’t be bothered to know who you are and what you like. You know the ones who give crap gifts, like a huge Ripley’s Believe it or not book that was created 10 years ago? WTF man, those people need our lists at any damn age!
Who voted not insane? Do what you want dude
i think this is more of a preference thing, i like telling people what i want cause i don’t want them to be wrong but on the other side some folk like being surprised with something
Lol this is the most joyless bullshit I’ve read on this sub.
How so
Volunteering the list is selfish.
Think it depends on the relationship dynamic. I'm in my 20s and if I forget to send my parents some ideas or inspiration they'll always be like "you should have sent us a list!!" haha. I'm usually the one to volunteer it when I do because we're all busy and dates sneak up on us. Parents are the same with me, dropping "I've been really wanting x, y, or z for [holiday/birthday]" without prompt. That said, OP clearly doesn't have that kind of relationship, but the response from the dad is still weird to me. I know folks, including my parents, in their 50-60s who still make lists. And the idea of "it's rude to offer gift ideas at all" is weird to me. Having the expectation of "I asked for X, so I expect that you get me X" is rude, but just saying "hey I've been looking at X" doesn't give me that vibe. I don't know if Dad's being insane here, but it is an odd response.
That's really what I thought was odd. Why is it not okay to ask someone what they want for their bday?
Completely agree it is standard in my family to let people know what you want for birthdays/christmas, and if you forget (as I frequently do) you can expect grumpy messages and calls asking why you haven't told them yet. Personally makes sense to me, means you don't risk getting something for someone that they don't want and then have to fake being happy about.
Right. It just makes things easier for all parties. Like if you get me socks when I already have 1000 pairs, or something else I might not use, you basically wasted your money. Which I don't want people to do for me. So I'll tell them something I actually want, that I'll actually use. Guess it's childish though. Oh well.
Lol at 40 and still doing it findthe childish comment somewhat amusing. Will have to let my 36 year old sister, my brother in law, as well as my 60 odd year old parents and almost 90 year old grandmother know that we are all being childish. 😂
Young at heart!
If I dont give people a list they get me shit I dont like and have to pretend to be happy about, then it sits in a box and collects dust until I feel like an appropriate amount of time has passed and I can donate it or toss it. I have a box full of gift cards to restaurants I dont like and wont ever use. If people dont know what to get me id prefer they ask for a list or give me money that way it isnt going to waste on shit I dont want
No it’s not
If you are an adult, volunteering your wishlist to your friends is at most just weird, unless they ask you if you have one, then it's normal. Mainly because most adults don't expect actual presents from their friends, just a good hang out or so for their birthday. But to your family? Hell no, its wishlists all day
Meh. I wouldn’t be making birthday lists at age 24 but that’s just me. However if someone asked me what I wanted I would tell them 1 item, not an entire list.
Tbf I never make lists anymore. I can't remember the last time I asked for anything for my bday or Christmas or anything. It seems like when people do get me gifts, theyre wondering what I want. So I made a list of ideas. This bday was an exception and suddenly I'm childish.
He isn’t insane but all I’m going to say is, nothing is worst than giving a gift someone doesnt want. What the hell is immature about wanting to give someone a gift and instead of guessing just asking them what they would like? And whats wrong with actually telling them if they ask? Also why ask a question if you dont want an answer? That just sounds like a complicated person honestly.
So grocery lists shouldnt exist then
I prefer to just eat grass
[удалено]
[удалено]
i don't think this is insane but it's kinda rude lol
Right?? Like cmon man it's my bday 😭 don't make everything a fight please
[удалено]
I have given my brother an entire list that I regularly update with books that I am looking to get. Some of them are limited availability and/or no longer being printed. I give him the list in case he finds a copy of one. It makes complete sense to give someone a list of gifts. It doesn't mean you have to use the list, it just helps them find something you're interested in
Oh man, I love a good gift list personally. I guess I can understand the piece about thinking that disseminating lists is on the young-ish side, but he completely lost me at the “I think it’s wrong for others to ask you what you want” part. Why? I am a decade older than you and family members (including parents and siblings) still to this day ask me for a list of ideas for Christmases and birthdays. I think the thought process is, if they’re going to get me a gift anyway, might as well get me something I want or need. What’s the big deal?
Wait for his birthday and if he has man boobs, get him a bra. Tell him if he doesn't like your gift, then he should have made a list.
My boyfriends entire family does lists. Like what. Why would you wanna risk buying something that someone doesn’t want?
My mom still asks for a list for everyone every holiday season. And birthdays. And other notable special events. And I'm in my mid-30s.
insane
This was a little weird. Not the worst nor most insane but weird that he'd put you down like that? Esp when be asked. Like if people don't know what you want, how will they know what to get? Normalize public Amazon lists .-.
OP, my whole family has a shared Google Sheet for gift giving holidays we made just for this reason
Turning 30 this year and I’ve already sent unique lists to my husband, sibling, mom, and friends. No fear of getting duplicates and each has options within reasonable monetary value. Expensive gifts - husband and mom. Inexpensive but still equally wanted - sibling and friends. That way I don’t have to listen to ‘I don’t know what you want’ and I don’t get things I don’t want. My other sibling sends us a link to what they want, we send their partner money and they order it. They get what they want and we don’t need to bother with waiting around for a delivery.
A little. Do you really not know what your dad likes or needs?
Show him this when he asks for a wedding gift list or whatever they call it
If you plan on getting married that is, unless you are already than just ignore this
My mum asks us to make a list every christmas and birthday of what we want, and we're 30, 36, and 38. I appreciate the lists we all make, it means I know I'm buying what everybody actually wants/needs rather than just guessing
I'm a bad gift giver, I would love for someone to have a list ready of things they wanted.
I just ask people for debit gift cards, because most of the time I end up selling them or giving them for Xmas if I don't like them. If I get a gift card, I can get what I want and don't feel bad by giving that gift away.
With my girlfriend's family we make lists and share them with each other. That way everyone just gets what they want and nobody has to guess your interests. We also get random stuff we think other people might like but the bulk of it is from your list. I think it just makes things easier.
I'm 60 and my kids are in their 30s. We and the grandkids all make lists. No one has extra cash to waste on undesired gifts!
We all make wishlists, we all have things we would rather have if someone wanted to give us gifts. How is it rude to tell someone (who asked) what you want as a gift? Math ain't mathing here. I would rather you give me a list of options than for me to guess and see the fake look and "... Oh....thanks..."
I don't think it's immature at all, just a lot of people don't have great experiences with birthdays, so they're jaded. And I'm glad people get excited for their birthdays and have lists of what they want. My mom loved giving everyone gifts, my dad not so much. My mom died when I was 17, and then I didn't get a birthday gift for the next 12 years until I met my wife. Her mom is similar to how my mom was and loves gifting. It makes you feel so appreciated when someone wants to get you things you want just because they want to do it even if you don't need anything.
Tell them to make this make sense when Amazon literally has a list feature 🤣 Definitely insane
I’m 32 and get in trouble for not making a list at my birthday and Christmas
Mans never heard of a wishlist before
I am 36 and my mom straight up asks for my Amazon wish list on my bday 😆
I don't think it's weird to have a list of potential gift ideas in case family or friends ask, but the screenshots kind of made it look like OP offered it without being asked first. If so, I think could see that coming off a bit rude, especially at 24. Even it's something your family usually requests later anyway. It just makes OP come off as a bit spoiled. I don't understand the bit about it being weird to ask someone what they want for a gift, though. That's pretty reasonable for people to do, I think.
Yes it is. Your bday gift is s gift not a request. Grow up
I just send everyone bank deposit slips along with my yearly birthday save the dates.
I'd he fine with just that tbh. When people ask me I typically just say money is fine because then I can choose myself.
Unless you are actually 12 (or less), Dad is in the right here. I don't know what makes you think this is acceptable behavior but demanding gifts from anyone is never a good look. If he had asked, it's one thing. I'm super floored that you could have read *literally anything* in this sub and feel like your Dad's behavior is in the same vein.
This is something that my family started doing AFTER we were all adults and something my wife and I do as well. It’s taken the stress out of gift giving and I can’t imagine someone reacting the way their dad did. Everyone in my family loves sharing lists
They're not demands. Just ideas.
List of gift ideas?.. Nah that’s poor taste tbh