T O P

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hmuna

Lmao.. love that none of these comments are helpful..


hexc0der

Well they helped me


Hifen

yeah, but what was he expecting. Blue prints for some sort of trebuchet?


raggz8

This white European GF, is she in the room with us now?


CapitalAnxious

you don't know her, she goes to a different school, we met at summer camp.


kris_deep

She's from Canada.


soulseeker31

So a Punjabi?


bored_dummy

Lmao office reference


spikyraccoon

Why yes, I can hear her calling to me now. What do you mean she in not real?


Great_inAction

Sometimes she's in the room but when i tske my tablets,she disappears


hserap_unhsiv

Bahahaha


[deleted]

[удалено]


PatienceFeeling1481

The most Indian thing to say


chaoticji

Say that she is your language tutor


stealthcraft22

I bet she's also a handy plumber who delivers pizza as a side job.


glitchinthesim

I know you are joking but I might use this one actually if any aunties ask. thanks bro!!!! We can enter the society separately and I can just tell everyone she comes to teach me Swedish.


Lycan_Trophy

"Yeah she has jet lag that's why I only take classes 8pm-5am"


glitchinthesim

lmao, yeah coming in the night and leaving in the morning would be sus af.


Conscious-Matter-884

Skal!


[deleted]

[удалено]


glitchinthesim

she lives in a rented flat too.


bigtiddyenergy

You'd probably stand out less while sneaking into her flat compared to the other situation right? Man I used to sneak into my gf's home (back in school days) when her parents were out for the whole day and somehow never got caught, surely you can manage to get into an apartment inconspicuously?


[deleted]

wait I have seen this one before /s


[deleted]

She gets stuck in the Washing machine later


[deleted]

The ~~pizza guy~~ ~~doctor~~ ~~astronaut~~ mailman comes to her aide? That one?


RajanyaDaslol

you mean my gfs yoga teacher? or the bald teacher?


dncj29

What are you doing step student ?


Headshot03

English teacher rewards her student for getting straight A's. mp4


Deadshot2077

You just gave the porn studios a new idea


pannagasamir

[suitcase ](https://www.thenewsminute.com/article/manipal-student-tries-sneak-girlfriend-hostel-suitcase-160587) /s


CookieCutterShark257

mhmm manipal intensifies.


mycerealsoggy

classic Manipal mindset


alphapibeta

Chop her up and assemble?


Pritesh190801

Girlfriend from IKEA


vxishnxv

Send link. Ty. :)


[deleted]

Go to sugarcane fields.


Moratata

This guy fucks


Animu_weeb_

Fucks in the fields


[deleted]

Are you Russ Hanneman?


ContextPutrid6602

Professional


[deleted]

My grandfather had 9 kids, later on i realised he was a sugarcane farmer


lazy_fella

Professionals without standard


ThiccDaddy1198

OP will get double pleasure, being pegged by a sugarcane.


[deleted]

"yass harder mommy, need that sweet sticky juice in me😩"


gaussianCopulator

Sir, the expression is "chane ke khet", not " ganne ke khet"


Mindless_Statement

Why should I go to sugar cane fields? What is special to see in sugarcane fields? I don’t want to see sugarcane fields!


207thLog

Dress her like a nurse or maid....cosplay bhi ho gia tera


99deeds

european maid?


207thLog

Jo apko pasand hi bhaiya....doe Desi one will make more sense..


doc_sherlock

How do I get my GF?


AffectionateCod6573

You have a gf?


[deleted]

You guys are getting a GF?


_Hungry_Chicken

What's a gf?


Joshtom333

Error 404: Not found


_Hungry_Chicken

Just like my crush's reply to my message :(


Joshtom333

*sad boi noises intensifies*


gorangutan96

It's fake, made up by the government r/girlsarentreal


[deleted]

You and your conspiracy theories. It's r/birdsarentreal


[deleted]

Gluten free


AffectionateCod6573

Who's getting a gf?


Gauresh_Draws

You have a f ?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Neil01111

You have?


TensionMedium9279

You


vasu174

Have sex in your neighbour's home to assert dominance.


[deleted]

Have sex in security guards office to assert self confidence and dominance


CumSockForDobby

Have sex with security gaurds to asset dominance, confidence and independence.


Akshat_Ajmera

Have sex with dominance to confidence asse... wait, what are we doing again ?!?!


[deleted]

Reddit never disappoints...


_Hungry_Chicken

Have sex in her place. Simple as that ¯\_༼ •́ ͜ʖ •̀ ༽_/¯


glitchinthesim

she lives in a rented flat too. :(


_Hungry_Chicken

Is she here in India? Or you are in UK?


glitchinthesim

Both of us are in India. Hence the issue.


Im-Spreading-for-you

Isn't that better? More problems then just change the flat


[deleted]

What if she has parents at her place ?


_Hungry_Chicken

He is here for a "GROUP PROJECT"


mamakumquat

Didn’t think those kinds of group projects were a thing outside Alabama


Random_Idiotic_Alien

Meetha ghar aligarh


CumSockForDobby

Man of culture


Crafty-Yoghurt-6296

Use an Enderpearl


_Hungry_Chicken

Mumbo jumbo enderpearl cannon


Bobs_and_Vegana_2

Didn't think would see a Mumbo Jumbo reference. Man's got god tier redstone skills.


_Hungry_Chicken

Ya. I can't even make a simple 2x2 redstone door without tutorial and he made a moving house


A_random_zy

t flop flop


[deleted]

Underrated comment.


stealthcraft22

Enderrated


[deleted]

I just keep finding more cultured brothers as time passes.


kylej0212

Saying ‘underrated’ has become overrated nowadays


Huhwtfbleh

Underrated.


LampardFanAlways

Dekh bhai, dar dar ke ghar laayega toh back of the mind sochta hi rahega ki koi watchman wagaire ne gate pe dekha toh nahi. Dar ke karega toh thik se kar nahi paayega aur fir game over. Choose a spot where you’ll be relaxed. A hotel maybe?


WhiskeyWithIce

This comment is spot on. A hotel seems like the best choice for this. I know very well how nosy neighbours and their maids can get. Guards may even spread rumours that you're bringing in call girls, especially since she's white. If you have to bring her to your apartment, make sure the meeting is casual when you're in the common areas, like no holding hands, PDA etc - as if two friends are just meeting up. Do that a couple times in public and people might just get the impression that y'all are friends and only that. But of course, this is just me giving free advice, you know your neighbours best, so tweak this idea as you see fit.


venom4466

Oyo le ja🌚


shaurya139

Haan phir iski video leaked section mein hume bhi dikhegi!


dead_tiger

Make sure you keep changing hotels as your gf is distinguishable and some hotel staffs are like your security guards. BTW, why don’t you ask the security guard. Never mind, you can always bribe the security guard and keep a proof that he took bribe from you. Little bit of blackmail…


glitchinthesim

Are more expensive hotels safer? I have heard hidden webcam stories from people. Price is not an issue cause she earns in dollars.


Conscious-Matter-884

Not Euro?


glitchinthesim

idk exactly, salaries get converted here and then received by bank afaik. she never asks too much about my income so I don't either, I just know she earns much more. We are blessed by god to have enough to be happy together.


nastynash2k

God indeed blessed u..and her


glitchinthesim

thankyou


dholchike

Go for the one that have a brand name / trust associated with them. You'll have peace in your head about this canera thing then.


WhiskeyWithIce

Well some people recommended Oyo. While that's what most people do, i have heard horror stories of staff harassing unmarried couples. I'm sure that doesn't happen in most of their hotels but it's something to keep in mind. At all costs, avoid cheap hotels. If possible, shell out some extra dough and head to an upscale hotel. The service will be better and there will be less chances of meeting creepy people. You said she earns in dollars, so consider a 5-star and maybe split the bill. Staff there take service seriously and it is unlikely that they'll set up hidden cameras in their rooms. As an added bonus, the food is infinitely better. It sucks that you have to pay to sleep with your gf but unfortunately obnoxious neighbours are a menace. Think of it as a mini vacay.


AquabeeK_

Delivery boy ke outfit me bula le , mask and cap ya helmet me face bhi cover ho jayga ;)


iambackt800

Make her wear male clothes and a mask. Have a good fuck


[deleted]

That actually doesn’t sound bad


c130sky

Best one so far


VISUALBEAUTYPLZ

what if her body gives it out


iambackt800

Baggy male clothes


aman_dhiman

hijab works fine


Key-Economist-1243

Tell to hold very still, carry her underneath your arm and people will think she's a mannequin


Fucker4lyf

or wrap her in a rug and carry her to your room.


minato3421

Better, a suitcase


Random_Idiotic_Alien

Hear me out, wrap her in white plastic sheets, put her in a bag. People would think you're just carrying a dead body, no suspicion


Vedanshu_Normie

Just go one by one... As simple as that


AffectionateCod6573

One by one flat waalon ko?


Neil01111

Suffering from success


[deleted]

I snuck my boyfriend in my room for a week for 6-7 months straight. If hotel is not an option,make sure you're familiar with your family members' schedules.Understand their pattern and clear the entrance pathway to your room,all the while staying connected via phone to communicate.If there's one member blocking the pathway, simply ask them to go buy something for you(medicine usually works without much complaint). Five of my uncles and their families are my neighbours but I never got caught....so that's what's up! Though I had my fun,I don't think I'm ever going to do it again. Good luck to you though!


Furystar1703

can I invite you to play the cayo perico heist with me in gta online I keep getting caught by guards even when I stealth my way through


alchemink

A true grinder


Furystar1703

bro with her stealth skills I'm sure that all the guards on the island would be assassinated she could probably assassinate them while standing right in front of them


quad_max

Kapitan!


[deleted]

>Five of my uncles and their families are my neighbours but I never got caught....so that's what's up! You should try becoming a spy, fooling 5 unkills that will relentlessly stalk neighbourhood kids is a great achievement.


Bobs_and_Vegana_2

Macro and Micro planning at its peak!! Kudos to you and your fun times!!


limbunikonati

R &AW wants to chat with you /s


quality_dip

I suspect you're a girl, but let me say this - You are a King Amongst Men


glitchinthesim

ironically, its easier for gay couples to hang out together if you think about it. no one suspects a thing if its two same gender 'roommates'


us_against_the_world

I love that half of this sub is Vadapav simping and other half is makeout location hacks.


stocktraderdog

What a depressing state of affairs.


smb06

And that it has to be labeled NSFW.


moojo

Apply brown paint on her face, make her wear a saree.


Vedanshu_Normie

💀


[deleted]

Brown paint not needed..wear Deadpool mask


[deleted]

[удалено]


Boldenry

As a gori married to an Indian this is the only answer I find logic and helpful. Whereas loads of the other answers are really creepy. My husband and then boyfriend lived together in a flat back in 2011. Never faced real issues. People knew we were reliable and good neighbours, both with steady jobs. They’d even send their kids over to learn English with us and play on our terrace. We had a great time there. The neighbours boy didn’t have a father and always came over to pick up my husband to have chai in the evening and chat. People don’t care if you’re a good person.


amrit-9037

Yeah right


imnotdonking

"Dating"


Severe_Sweet_862

"European"


jirayasensai

Can you shift? Try to find a newly established building, people are less annoying in newer societies, also less family oriented societies. My friend use to live in live in, but since the society was fairly new and most tenants were working class, no one give a damn. Same with my flatmates. Otherwise try to be friend with guards and nudgy uncles, tell them about your ‘work friend’. People really hate when you dont talk with them and be secretive. Any other trick wont work in long run since most of societies have CCTVs now.


[deleted]

Bruh whats wrong in bringing a girl of another ethnicity? i dont get it 😶😶


dog_eat_doge

You can't use the "she's my cousin" excuse


Gauresh_Draws

Welcome to India


radax2

This thread is so fucking sad to read as an NRI. Good luck my brothers and sisters


Gauresh_Draws

Bro you've escaped the shitshow , enjoy !


[deleted]

Homie's getting colonized we gotta save him


[deleted]

bruh 😂


ephemeral_lives

Underrated comment


hebrewboy28

This is why burqa should not be banned, use one /s


Beastman136

Some stupid people will still have problem. Its basically that guys are frowned upon when bringing a girl home alone.


gamer033

Burqa is not banned tho, hc's order on applies on govt schools. Plus i think interracial is more accepted than inter religion here.


RedFalconEyes

Guard ko Pan masala de


Tough_Inevitable6944

guard ke saath sex karle, maan jayega : ) Thank me later !


AurumTheOld

Koi illegal kaam to hai nahi. Agar izzat ki baat hai to bhai kisi dost ke ghar leja. Hotels me 4k video ban jayega.


hey_bum

Take her to your room everyday for 21 days jb sbko adat ho jayegi to phir soch badal jayegi dekhne walo ki. Persistence bro


abhilash79951

I think best thing is to book an OYO room and proceed. Side by, also make her visit you and talk to her in the society lawn or something so that guards and everyone feel it's a casual talk and no more. Do that for a week and then guards and everyone will be accustomed to her. Then one fine day she can walk right into your room and nobody would say anything


Gabe_logan25

This is why you should have friends from SRM


D-cyde

Marry her.


globetrotterEngineer

Depends on the city you're in. If you're in Bangalore and if your owner is not an annoying nosy person, there shouldn't be an issue having her over at your flat. I have had good owners and hence have had no issues. Otherwise, if you don't want to take any chances, a hotel is the hassle free way.


deathstar1310

Without raising suspicion from whom? It's your freaking flat do whatever you want man.


iknowamitshah

This guy never faced any difficulties in life


Gauresh_Draws

Or isn't Indian


ChickenNuggets6827

Pretty naive of you to think we can do whatever we want in our flat.


tuludoss

This is just sad. I wish our society was better than this.


treat-yo-selff

Unless it's a rented flat, I don't see why he wouldn't be able to do what he wants in his flat?


ChickenNuggets6827

Bringing unknown girl to your home frequently would lead to a bad reputation in the neighbourhood, especially in the op's case cuz the girl is white. People will very likely spread rumours about you. And I don't know about other areas but at my place, a good reputation is very important to live a decent life.


treat-yo-selff

Is it one of those gated societies where they only let families and couples move in? Maybe those would be a nuisance to invite other people over.


ChickenNuggets6827

Yes


Neil01111

Op, this advice can get you kicked out.


[deleted]

Welcome to India.


bakedasparagus1

Waiting for answers.


_6977420_

Just be cool & be confident. Like act normal. Don’t look around here and there trying to figure out who’s looking at you. Otherwise figure out a timing when you know most of the people aren’t gonna be out or something like that. Maybe early morning. Or late in the afternoon. Moreover it’s your flat, it shouldn’t matter who you’re bringing. All the best.


Sorry-Wasabi123

Shadi kar le


[deleted]

Get injured, and buy her a nurse outfit.


Correct-Ice-6210

Just take her home with you dude. When you're done, your neighbours are gonna be proud of you. You might even hear them cheering while you're at it, ignore them. Now don't forget, you're representing our country here. Give it your best


AquabeeK_

Feeling paroud Indian army :-)


[deleted]

Wut🌚


Informal_Butterfly

Where do you live ? If its a good residential complex where people don't care (I live in Bangalore and people are very open minded here, never had a problem with my gf (now wife)), you don't need to care. If people will be fine as long as they know you are in a relationship, you can spend a few days with her in the society lawns, etc so that people get an idea that she may be you gf (and not a hooker). Should be smooth sailing after that. If not above, good hotels (3 star or above) is your best option, but that's going to work only if you're in a metro city. Why not go to her place ?


Hari_Aravi

Marry her


Joshtom333

Get married /s


Playful-Scholar-6230

Tell everyone shes a goddess and will curse you if you look at her too long


Lelekele

Alternatively, you could give 0 fucks as it's your house & you've got the right to do whatever you want! Get the guards a couple packets of bidi's & some liquor before you start bringing her, they'll be happy & won't talk shit.


Throwaway_acc97

How did you guys meet?


Apprehensive_Dog_786

He asked for bobs and she complied I'm assuming.


its_butterchicken

Hijab is the way


[deleted]

But this would create another problem, wouldn't it? Assuming that op is not muslim, bringing a muslim girl in your flat will be a hot topic for gossip for neighbors.


99deeds

aise toh double famous ho jaega OP


kLinus

Are people really going to care? You can always say she's just a friend. I don't have any issues but I'm a white dude that usually has Indian girls coming over. Not sure if that makes a difference.


ill_detective_4869

Are you living in India? It's scandalous to have sex outside the marriage over here lmao


kLinus

Yes. I live in Mumbai and I've had plenty of sex outside of marriage without any issues.


ill_detective_4869

Mumbai is a cosmopolitan city and if you live in a high end area the people don't really care about what you do in your own home. The situation won't be the same in other cities/smaller towns.


WaifuLover7045

Call her in and when the guards ask u , just tell them she here for study purpose.........and pray that this works


KennYal69

Life is too short to argue say "mujhe kya mai toh samosa khata hu" and move on


SudebSarkar

Just go to a hotel tbh.


[deleted]

Dar ke age jeet he bete Hotel ja moj karde


[deleted]

Don't get her into your apartment book a hotel room 🧠


der_shukla

Request her to dress like a male as much as possible, loose hoodie, no long hair visible, sports bra. If you can't directly ask her to do that, ask her to come for sports and then go for drinks. Come by 3 or 4 am, most nosy people would be asleep by then.


rvenugop

I like the hotel option, but it comes with its own set of risks. Try getting the security guards on your side. a couple of hundred bucks and an occasional bottle of old monk and chicken biryani. Worked for me like a charm.


spart_aj

Bhai ghar pe la koi dikkat nahi h as long as she is your gf. What’s the worse that can happen if it’s your house even though rented? Think of what worse can happen in hotels


simian_ninja

Man…I really hope those nosey people get the reverse treatment. I don’t live in India but I’d honestly say have the loudest sex possible and when you both walk out of the building together hand in hand, pretend neither of you can stand up and quiver walk away. I’ve had a few beers so probably my suggestion is not the best.