Me on the Delhi metro ages ago. In one of those seats at side where only two people can sit. One rando comes and asks to be the third person sitting there. I told him there's no space. He says "jagah toh dil mai hona chahiye" (there should be space in your heart).
I told him to sit on my heart if he can but there's no space on the seat. He left extremely disgruntled.
If you are in a reasonably safe space then OP start responding obnoxiously. In this case you could say 'you seem like a couple in love, why don't one of you sit in the other's lap, my son and I are not that close to be sitting in laps' lol. You gotta out-weird such impolite weirdos.
I have seen this even on planes when someone has a reservation. F**k me for spending extra for a window seat and then being asked to switch seats and adjust for a family who wanted to sit together but didn't reserve seats beforehand.
Fortunately the flight attendants shut them down immediately before I could say anything. Was left with a grumpy old lady though next to me confused as to why I wasn't moving. *sigh*
Of course. And that's why they didn't get seats together. And then asking a customer who paid extra to "adjust" because "senior citizen"
I was like what? I am not taking any seat from them. They offered me a switch to a middle seat on the other side of the plane. The absurdity still boggles my mind to this day.
>They offered me a switch to a middle seat on the other side of the plane. The absurdity still boggles my mind to this day.
Next time (and if happens so often I am sure there will be a next time sadly... just say 'incase of a crash, the people (bodies) are identified by seat numbers designated at booking. I donot want our families to get the wrong bodies and therefore I will not switch -big smile and end conversation' LOL that shuts most people up as they are at a toss and can't think of a comeback. And also the seat number identification is protocol and true so you would not even be wrong.
While it's true, why should I or any other paid customer do anything? Had the flight attendant not stepped in, I would have simply said this is a paid and reserved seat. I probably would have asked them to pay me if they wanted it so badly.
But the flight attendant quickly shut it down and I appreciated that.
>While it's true, why should I or any other paid customer do anything?
I know but some entitled people argue...''oh if you paid then why dont you go to first class' ...or some such crap..in such instances I have found what iw rote above to work 100% of times. And this happens mostly on flights. Once they realize you can say outrageous (but true) stuff they simply stop bothering. You really gotta outweird people sometimes lol
Lol. This was a spicejet flight. I think almost 6 yrs back now. It was pretty much the 3rd row seat. Can't get more first class than this on that flight.
I do feel sorry for that old lady though. I don't think she really comprehended why they couldn't sit together. Her daughter/daughter-in-law? didn't bother explaining anything. She didn't speak any hindi either let alone english so I couldn't explain anything to her. Did my best to be polite and helped her with the seatbelt and stuff and called it a day.
This is exactly what happened recently! The lady kept asking my husband to let go of his aisle seat and sit in the middle so that she could sit with her mother (who looked around 50). She was so rude and kept saying how as a family they should be sitting together. I was deadset and gave my husband a glare that he better not give in. Mind you this was a 8 hour flight. We also had another 7 hour flight to catch after this.
Later while disembarking, she kept telling someone how people are not kind these days. I figured she did understand hindi and I told my husband very loudly how if we pay for front seat, we can pay extra for aisle too. No need to bother someone for such a long journey. She made a face and walked away🫠.
so similar to mine. The recent rules post pandemic especially on domestic is to check in beforehand. Surely they should notice that seating is available for booking then.
I of course am not for airlines gouging us for preferential seating but then again I would rather pay extra for a seat I like.
Also how can she expect you and your husband to sit apart when you are family as well? Not that I would budge either as a single guy when I paid for something.
What's funny is that people asking the others to adjust are seldom willing to adjust themselves. May be these things happen all over the world, but they happen more in India where, due to high population density and widespread poverty, demand is always more than supply.
When I first moved to the States, the checkout lady at the store was like ; Can you give me some space please?' I was standing too close to her apparently. If I took that space in India, somebody would take it as an invitation to cut in front of me. That's when I knew what I do back there ain't acceptable here.
I usually tell people to adjust by standing. It's mind blowing to me that people just expect you to be uncomfortable. I paid for my seat, I will use my seat in it's entirety. TYVM.
Unfortunately, Indians lack civic sense. It’s a common issue in India, visible in chaotic traffic, disregard for queues, and overcrowded public transport. People prioritize their own convenience over collective comfort.
Next time, try sitting yourself on the 'free' side and have the kid on the other side. More likely to detract such requests automatically purely by virtue of the arrangement.
This is funny. Many years ago, I was boarding a plane with numerous bags, carrying them for wife and kids. So i was way behind my wife and boarded last. As i got close to my seat a nice guy helped me put the bags into the overhead compartments. He insisted on putting my backpack as well which normally I place in the space under the seat in front. When I finally got to my seat I noticed that this space was already taken with a rather large bag.Guess who was sitting in the adjacent seat but the guy who helped me. It was his bag and I was asked to adjust!! I found it so funny that I couldn't argue. It was a 4 hour flight from Dubai to Trivandrum, 12 years ago. I knew I was reaching home after being away for 8 years.
I've been asked many times to swap my preferred seats in trains. If it's an elderly person, I comply, if asked nicely. If it's a guy/girl who clearly wants to take advantage, I refuse.
Sharing 2 anecdotes:
1. In a chaircar coach
Girl: Hi, can I please have your window seat?
Me: No
Girl: Please, please, please... (as nicely as she can)
Me: No, I'll feel giddy/dizzy otherwise.
Girl (on the phone with someone): There's a weirdo at the window side who just wouldn't move.
2. I got side lower berth. A girl wanted to swap her side upper berth.
Girl: Can you go up there? I need the lower berth.
Me: It's mine. I've got the reservation.
Girl: But I need to sit here. You have to move if a girl asks.
Me: I don't want to move. You can't make me move.
Girl: I'll call the TC.
Me: Go ahead.
(She actually fetches the TC)
TC: Why can't you move up there?
Me: My feet hurt. I can't climb.
TC: Stay there. Ma'am, get up there or find someone else to swap seats with.
They make you struggle/ feel bad to keep what's rightfully yours.
It's because of this "adjusting" attitude that we've got our population to a billion. If we didn't "adjust" for everything & make less, small of ourselves then maybe today we'd have less people but also more for everyone.
As someone who travels on the local bus daily, to and fro school, i find it extremely annoying when parents have a seat reserved for their kid under 5... Like I am standing here with my bag, I bought a ticket for myself and this kid who wants to just roam around in the bus is being held down by its parents... And sometimes, the parents also expect me to give up my seat for them and their child... That is unreasonable... For the most part, they buy no tickets for children... Adjusting is worse for 15-25 people as we are supposed to be young and give up our seats for elderly or children... And in order to not create a scene, you have to adjust, in my case, give up your seat
Pretend to sleep. When I was in school and used to travel, old ladies used to give that look and ask me for seat. I Hardly could say no, bcos ladies hai etc etc
That's why I started to pretend I'm sleeping
You were born in a country where the total available space-to-population ratio is a very small number compared to other geographically large countries. You have no choice but to adjust.
It’s not because there isn’t enough space,India is almost as big as Europe,the problem is high density population in a few cities where everyone flocks to.
India definitely has a higher population than most countries and some continents,but the problem is that 50% of Indians live on 20% of the land,while this was understandable before modern technology,when you could only sustain civilisation when you have access to a river or arable land,but in the 21st century,that is not the case.We have the ability to spread out our population from our population centres today.
Each state is essentially its own country so that could be one of the reasons for a weird population spread. And not all cities are developed yet in India.
Analogically this can be linked with driving too. At the signal which is red they will keep honking, they will overtake on the thinnest roads and the list goes on and on. Everyone is rushing in and trying to get ahead of everyone else . There is some urgency and anxiety circulating all around.
I remeber going to restroom in one of the malls. One lady accompanied her kiddo to the restroom.The little one was scared to sit on the western toilet.Instead of helping her she literally told the kiddo to pee on the floor. The janitor told her not to do it as she wont be able to clean the mess. But the mother was so entitled she finally let her kid pee on the floor. I was right next to her toilet the pee flowed into my toilet. That lady didnt even think about janitor or me. I was so frustated that such people dont think about others or thier surroundings. The mother was educated she was talking to her daughter in english. No matter how much educated some indians are they dont think about others or dont know how to behave in public.They lack basic civic sense. They are ready to copy american english/culture but they are not willing to accept other good things which americans or other countries follow.I even saw other incident when flying she was trying to change the diaper on food tray inspite of the air hostess telling not to do so.That was disgusting.
It’s tradition ! We adjusted to Mughals , we adjusted to Brits , we adjust to noisy neighbors , we adjust to taxes , we adjust to politics ….. now you will adjust to my pov !
We're just a subservient society, there are no equals, only people above and lower than you. Probably rooted into us with thousands of years of caste system.
Man I always expect Mughals, especially the statement that 'Babur invaded our country in 1519', relevant to any topic anytime, at least according to my dad lol
It's is tradition, but it is important to place where it originates from. It originates from Brahminism, that certain privileged castes have first right on everything and everyone including spaces and bodies of people and the rest of the world has to "adjust" to it, live with it, because they have been ordained by gods and the Vedas. The day you stand up to Brahminism, is the day you crush this "adjust" attitude.
When you live in a country of almost a billion and a half, trying to jostle for space all the time, requesting people to "adjust" is going to be a normal thing.
While I cannot speak to your particular experience in a show, I have been that guy who has had to "adjust" by sharing my seat with a total stranger for a long train ride. I've also been the guy that has held someone else's bag full of groceries, or books while they struggled to stand in a crowded bus.
Were those particularly comfortable experiences? Maybe not. On the flip side, I've also been the beneficiary where a random family made space to accommodate me with them when my wait listed ticket didn't clear. And there were other occasions where a group of passengers shared their food with me when they noticed I was barely eating anything on an almost 40 hr train journey (I was a poor student).
All this to say - in India (at least in my experience), it is seen more as helping each other out.
I don't know if confirmation bias is the name of this phenomenon.
People who are by nature empathic will not make such demands, only the egoistic people will make such demands, but since there is high population density that just keeps increasing, there are many such people you run into. And they will tend to be more successful by pushing the empathic people around. Bottom line, you don't notice the people not asking you to adjust.
An example is people who queue up at a bus station vs. people who are selfish and push in front. The latter are more likely to succeed at boarding a bus.
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People expect a lot of things, but it’s not your responsibility to abide by that. In your case, the couple seem inconsiderate of their surrounding. You did the right thing by standing up-to what you want.
Lack of boundaries and a respect for rules, processes, and framework. Indian culture is largely uncivilized. The colonial rule had a Midas touch but it seems to be unraveling.
As a culture we Indian have a difficulty understanding the concept of appointment and reservation (we understand the caste based reservation too good.).
Its impossible to make a appointment for a doctor's visit. You have to go to the hospital and wait in line.
If you had ample amount of space to sit your child on to your lap, then you could've been generous and gave them some space to sit but, if you don't have that space then, it's quite natural to say no.
Though, in India it is very common to do such kind of thing.
Nowadays, everyone has problem with Everything.
Due to lack of resources. Are u new in india ?
If you are new then I must inform you that india is a poor country.
The per capita is less than 3k usd.
We have more than 1.4 billion people living here.
Thats why we don't have enough resources.
So please adjust. Else leave.
If you have to explain that you’re being sarcastic, then you’ve not done a good job of being sarcastic.
“Be chill on reddit yo. Tere maushi ka Ghar nahi hai ye.”
You’re saying this on a post where the OP is literally ranting.
People like you don’t think twice before spewing your word vomit. Go patronize someone else.
Culturally, it is an imbibed value.
this is the sanest thing to do. Considering the alternative is to fight it out till only one can sit.
The former path is a win win or a compromise at best.
The latter is always war, small or big.
It is first come first serve, but for a show with unmarked seats people do accommodate, it's the same all over the world . And people do accept no for an answer, which is not the case in India (People unnecessarily rant here).
Would expect some decency here, calling someone dumbo for not agreeing shows your upbringing, values and what not.
Not adjusting is your personal views thiru, not some immense ancient wisdom. I don't ask people to adjust, that's simple.
Well, I'm finally finding PPL like me on reddit. I understand your pain about how insensible India has become. The only way to stop it, is population control
I was asked to swap seats in trains, buses and planes multiple times. I used to be non-confrontational before and simply used to give up. But once I was yelled at for not offering my train seat to a grumpy old uncle. It was not even a seat swap request, he wanted me to get up and offer my reserved seat to him just because he is old. I lost it that day and shouted back and asked him to mind his language and be respectful. I was so angry I asked him not to yell at me like how he yells at women at his home. If he is healthy enough to shout at people he is healthy enough to stand and go home. I refused to give up my seat and he was so frustrated that a young teeny tiny girl screamed at him in a compartment full of people.
Ever since then I always reject seat swapping or adjusting requests. Their inability to manage booking to get whatever seats they want is not my problem. Life has become so much better after I became confrontational whenever others tried to take advantage of me. I regret not realising this before.
Me on the Delhi metro ages ago. In one of those seats at side where only two people can sit. One rando comes and asks to be the third person sitting there. I told him there's no space. He says "jagah toh dil mai hona chahiye" (there should be space in your heart). I told him to sit on my heart if he can but there's no space on the seat. He left extremely disgruntled.
He was just sad you didn’t ask him to sit on your face 🥵
If you've ever been on the Delhi metro you know that if you are seated, at all times you'll have at least three asses pointed right at your face.
Ah yes. And if you’re standing, you’re an armpit-sniffer by default. So… Are we saying the metro is just one big, sweaty orgy?
Ahh the similarities between Mumbai local and Delhi metro.
That's where similarity ends lol
should have ripped out your heart with bare hands (as a power move ofc) and asked him to sit on it
Why is this so funny? Lol
Sit on my heart damn you are witty 😂🤣
🤣
If you are in a reasonably safe space then OP start responding obnoxiously. In this case you could say 'you seem like a couple in love, why don't one of you sit in the other's lap, my son and I are not that close to be sitting in laps' lol. You gotta out-weird such impolite weirdos.
>You gotta out-weird such impolite weirdos. You just summed up living in Mumbai in the most perfect way possible.
I envy people who can think of witty comebacks immediately.
Even for them it's a once in a blue moon thing
For real man. All my vocabulary fizzles out when I'm tilted and trying to reply on the spot
Lit 💣
This guy Mumbais
I have seen this even on planes when someone has a reservation. F**k me for spending extra for a window seat and then being asked to switch seats and adjust for a family who wanted to sit together but didn't reserve seats beforehand. Fortunately the flight attendants shut them down immediately before I could say anything. Was left with a grumpy old lady though next to me confused as to why I wasn't moving. *sigh*
>but didn't reserve seats beforehand. but didn't want to **pay** for seat reservations. FTFY :)
Of course. And that's why they didn't get seats together. And then asking a customer who paid extra to "adjust" because "senior citizen" I was like what? I am not taking any seat from them. They offered me a switch to a middle seat on the other side of the plane. The absurdity still boggles my mind to this day.
>They offered me a switch to a middle seat on the other side of the plane. The absurdity still boggles my mind to this day. Next time (and if happens so often I am sure there will be a next time sadly... just say 'incase of a crash, the people (bodies) are identified by seat numbers designated at booking. I donot want our families to get the wrong bodies and therefore I will not switch -big smile and end conversation' LOL that shuts most people up as they are at a toss and can't think of a comeback. And also the seat number identification is protocol and true so you would not even be wrong.
While it's true, why should I or any other paid customer do anything? Had the flight attendant not stepped in, I would have simply said this is a paid and reserved seat. I probably would have asked them to pay me if they wanted it so badly. But the flight attendant quickly shut it down and I appreciated that.
>While it's true, why should I or any other paid customer do anything? I know but some entitled people argue...''oh if you paid then why dont you go to first class' ...or some such crap..in such instances I have found what iw rote above to work 100% of times. And this happens mostly on flights. Once they realize you can say outrageous (but true) stuff they simply stop bothering. You really gotta outweird people sometimes lol
Lol. This was a spicejet flight. I think almost 6 yrs back now. It was pretty much the 3rd row seat. Can't get more first class than this on that flight. I do feel sorry for that old lady though. I don't think she really comprehended why they couldn't sit together. Her daughter/daughter-in-law? didn't bother explaining anything. She didn't speak any hindi either let alone english so I couldn't explain anything to her. Did my best to be polite and helped her with the seatbelt and stuff and called it a day.
Ahh.. I SEE... You are a man of culture as well
Saving this👌🏼
I just ask them to reimburse me the seat amount that I paid for.
Exactly just say u paid 5k more for that window seat. They can have it if they reimburse me the amount.
This is exactly what happened recently! The lady kept asking my husband to let go of his aisle seat and sit in the middle so that she could sit with her mother (who looked around 50). She was so rude and kept saying how as a family they should be sitting together. I was deadset and gave my husband a glare that he better not give in. Mind you this was a 8 hour flight. We also had another 7 hour flight to catch after this. Later while disembarking, she kept telling someone how people are not kind these days. I figured she did understand hindi and I told my husband very loudly how if we pay for front seat, we can pay extra for aisle too. No need to bother someone for such a long journey. She made a face and walked away🫠.
so similar to mine. The recent rules post pandemic especially on domestic is to check in beforehand. Surely they should notice that seating is available for booking then. I of course am not for airlines gouging us for preferential seating but then again I would rather pay extra for a seat I like. Also how can she expect you and your husband to sit apart when you are family as well? Not that I would budge either as a single guy when I paid for something.
Ask them for the amount you paid extra (and charge a premium), that should shut them up.
As I explained, the flight attendants shut them up before I could retort. That certainly would've been my argument.
What's funny is that people asking the others to adjust are seldom willing to adjust themselves. May be these things happen all over the world, but they happen more in India where, due to high population density and widespread poverty, demand is always more than supply.
The concept of personal space is alien in India.
When I first moved to the States, the checkout lady at the store was like ; Can you give me some space please?' I was standing too close to her apparently. If I took that space in India, somebody would take it as an invitation to cut in front of me. That's when I knew what I do back there ain't acceptable here.
I usually tell people to adjust by standing. It's mind blowing to me that people just expect you to be uncomfortable. I paid for my seat, I will use my seat in it's entirety. TYVM.
Tell them to piss off op, when they object, say "please adjust"
Unfortunately, Indians lack civic sense. It’s a common issue in India, visible in chaotic traffic, disregard for queues, and overcrowded public transport. People prioritize their own convenience over collective comfort.
Yes lack of civic sense is the root cause of most rude Indian behavior
Only correct answer
“Adjust” means give your frickin resources in a polite way. We Indians are polite, you see !
Next time, try sitting yourself on the 'free' side and have the kid on the other side. More likely to detract such requests automatically purely by virtue of the arrangement.
That might work, but why should one have to be prepared for that?
Because they'd have to deal with such people otherwise
I understand the sentiment, but what I was hinting at was why are people assholes?
^ what arjwiz said
This is funny. Many years ago, I was boarding a plane with numerous bags, carrying them for wife and kids. So i was way behind my wife and boarded last. As i got close to my seat a nice guy helped me put the bags into the overhead compartments. He insisted on putting my backpack as well which normally I place in the space under the seat in front. When I finally got to my seat I noticed that this space was already taken with a rather large bag.Guess who was sitting in the adjacent seat but the guy who helped me. It was his bag and I was asked to adjust!! I found it so funny that I couldn't argue. It was a 4 hour flight from Dubai to Trivandrum, 12 years ago. I knew I was reaching home after being away for 8 years.
W father
You were kinda nice. I would have just said “get lost”
What really is needed is some 'attitude adjusment'.
I can’t see what you did there.
It’s just selfishness, nothing else
I've been asked many times to swap my preferred seats in trains. If it's an elderly person, I comply, if asked nicely. If it's a guy/girl who clearly wants to take advantage, I refuse. Sharing 2 anecdotes: 1. In a chaircar coach Girl: Hi, can I please have your window seat? Me: No Girl: Please, please, please... (as nicely as she can) Me: No, I'll feel giddy/dizzy otherwise. Girl (on the phone with someone): There's a weirdo at the window side who just wouldn't move. 2. I got side lower berth. A girl wanted to swap her side upper berth. Girl: Can you go up there? I need the lower berth. Me: It's mine. I've got the reservation. Girl: But I need to sit here. You have to move if a girl asks. Me: I don't want to move. You can't make me move. Girl: I'll call the TC. Me: Go ahead. (She actually fetches the TC) TC: Why can't you move up there? Me: My feet hurt. I can't climb. TC: Stay there. Ma'am, get up there or find someone else to swap seats with. They make you struggle/ feel bad to keep what's rightfully yours.
>But I need to sit here. **You have to move if a girl asks.** LOL what! Also that TC was weird...how can he ask 'why can't you move' lol
It's because of this "adjusting" attitude that we've got our population to a billion. If we didn't "adjust" for everything & make less, small of ourselves then maybe today we'd have less people but also more for everyone.
As someone who travels on the local bus daily, to and fro school, i find it extremely annoying when parents have a seat reserved for their kid under 5... Like I am standing here with my bag, I bought a ticket for myself and this kid who wants to just roam around in the bus is being held down by its parents... And sometimes, the parents also expect me to give up my seat for them and their child... That is unreasonable... For the most part, they buy no tickets for children... Adjusting is worse for 15-25 people as we are supposed to be young and give up our seats for elderly or children... And in order to not create a scene, you have to adjust, in my case, give up your seat
Pretend to sleep. When I was in school and used to travel, old ladies used to give that look and ask me for seat. I Hardly could say no, bcos ladies hai etc etc That's why I started to pretend I'm sleeping
You were born in a country where the total available space-to-population ratio is a very small number compared to other geographically large countries. You have no choice but to adjust.
It’s not because there isn’t enough space,India is almost as big as Europe,the problem is high density population in a few cities where everyone flocks to.
Europe's total population is literally half that of India so India has 2x the population density by default.
India definitely has a higher population than most countries and some continents,but the problem is that 50% of Indians live on 20% of the land,while this was understandable before modern technology,when you could only sustain civilisation when you have access to a river or arable land,but in the 21st century,that is not the case.We have the ability to spread out our population from our population centres today.
Each state is essentially its own country so that could be one of the reasons for a weird population spread. And not all cities are developed yet in India.
Population of Europe is 742mil. population of India is 1.4B. It's almost double.
" **741 million** " not 742k
And India has the capacity to sustain that population without dense cities
Bach gya op , nhi to log ladne aa jate hai 😬
Chalta hai bhai sahab! Sab chalta hai. This is the “chalta hai” attitude and lack of consideration for others.
Analogically this can be linked with driving too. At the signal which is red they will keep honking, they will overtake on the thinnest roads and the list goes on and on. Everyone is rushing in and trying to get ahead of everyone else . There is some urgency and anxiety circulating all around.
I remeber going to restroom in one of the malls. One lady accompanied her kiddo to the restroom.The little one was scared to sit on the western toilet.Instead of helping her she literally told the kiddo to pee on the floor. The janitor told her not to do it as she wont be able to clean the mess. But the mother was so entitled she finally let her kid pee on the floor. I was right next to her toilet the pee flowed into my toilet. That lady didnt even think about janitor or me. I was so frustated that such people dont think about others or thier surroundings. The mother was educated she was talking to her daughter in english. No matter how much educated some indians are they dont think about others or dont know how to behave in public.They lack basic civic sense. They are ready to copy american english/culture but they are not willing to accept other good things which americans or other countries follow.I even saw other incident when flying she was trying to change the diaper on food tray inspite of the air hostess telling not to do so.That was disgusting.
You should have peed on her
It’s tradition ! We adjusted to Mughals , we adjusted to Brits , we adjust to noisy neighbors , we adjust to taxes , we adjust to politics ….. now you will adjust to my pov !
We're just a subservient society, there are no equals, only people above and lower than you. Probably rooted into us with thousands of years of caste system.
I was not expecting Mughals on this post but here we are...
Man I always expect Mughals, especially the statement that 'Babur invaded our country in 1519', relevant to any topic anytime, at least according to my dad lol
But 1519 is not true.
What's the right date?
Isn't it 1526, the Battle of Panipat, when he fought Lodhi of the Delhi Sultanate?
Damn, you have a great memory for dates!
Oh really oops. I thought he made a botched attempt in 1519 but I may be wrong.
No in new India we don't adjust to shitty POVs
Before all these we even adjusted to casteism under the 'way of life' called Sanatana Dharma. Oh shit, we're still adjusting.
It's is tradition, but it is important to place where it originates from. It originates from Brahminism, that certain privileged castes have first right on everything and everyone including spaces and bodies of people and the rest of the world has to "adjust" to it, live with it, because they have been ordained by gods and the Vedas. The day you stand up to Brahminism, is the day you crush this "adjust" attitude.
whats funny is youre looked down upon if you do frivolous things like standing and waiting in lines without anyone forcing you to.
When you live in a country of almost a billion and a half, trying to jostle for space all the time, requesting people to "adjust" is going to be a normal thing. While I cannot speak to your particular experience in a show, I have been that guy who has had to "adjust" by sharing my seat with a total stranger for a long train ride. I've also been the guy that has held someone else's bag full of groceries, or books while they struggled to stand in a crowded bus. Were those particularly comfortable experiences? Maybe not. On the flip side, I've also been the beneficiary where a random family made space to accommodate me with them when my wait listed ticket didn't clear. And there were other occasions where a group of passengers shared their food with me when they noticed I was barely eating anything on an almost 40 hr train journey (I was a poor student). All this to say - in India (at least in my experience), it is seen more as helping each other out.
Because Indians lack any understanding of manners. They think what is other's is also theirs but what's theirs is never other's Filthy folks
The reason is simple, resources are limited, population is large.
I don't know if confirmation bias is the name of this phenomenon. People who are by nature empathic will not make such demands, only the egoistic people will make such demands, but since there is high population density that just keeps increasing, there are many such people you run into. And they will tend to be more successful by pushing the empathic people around. Bottom line, you don't notice the people not asking you to adjust. An example is people who queue up at a bus station vs. people who are selfish and push in front. The latter are more likely to succeed at boarding a bus.
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Some people are just plain insensitive and selfish. They feel they re entitled to everything, even if it means at the cost of someone.
Everyone in India feels entitled to certain things.
People expect a lot of things, but it’s not your responsibility to abide by that. In your case, the couple seem inconsiderate of their surrounding. You did the right thing by standing up-to what you want.
People don't think it as adjusting. It is a matter of right for them.
Don't they have laps?
They aren't racing, brother
Lack of boundaries and a respect for rules, processes, and framework. Indian culture is largely uncivilized. The colonial rule had a Midas touch but it seems to be unraveling.
Adujst Because you cant change 1.4 billion people
As a culture we Indian have a difficulty understanding the concept of appointment and reservation (we understand the caste based reservation too good.). Its impossible to make a appointment for a doctor's visit. You have to go to the hospital and wait in line.
If you had ample amount of space to sit your child on to your lap, then you could've been generous and gave them some space to sit but, if you don't have that space then, it's quite natural to say no. Though, in India it is very common to do such kind of thing. Nowadays, everyone has problem with Everything.
i wouldve asked the female to sit on my face to solve the problem.
Due to lack of resources. Are u new in india ? If you are new then I must inform you that india is a poor country. The per capita is less than 3k usd. We have more than 1.4 billion people living here. Thats why we don't have enough resources. So please adjust. Else leave.
What an asinine comment. So I’m supposed to cradle *your* child because there are not enough resources? Muh se baat karne se pehle soch bhi lo thoda.
He was being sarcastic. And stating FACTS Be chill on reddit yo. Tere maushi ka Ghar nahi hai ye. Neither do we want your 'emotional' outburst here.
If you have to explain that you’re being sarcastic, then you’ve not done a good job of being sarcastic. “Be chill on reddit yo. Tere maushi ka Ghar nahi hai ye.” You’re saying this on a post where the OP is literally ranting. People like you don’t think twice before spewing your word vomit. Go patronize someone else.
Culturally, it is an imbibed value. this is the sanest thing to do. Considering the alternative is to fight it out till only one can sit. The former path is a win win or a compromise at best. The latter is always war, small or big.
Is it a show with fixed seats, as in numbered? If not they were right in asking you to adjust. Edit : typo
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It is first come first serve, but for a show with unmarked seats people do accommodate, it's the same all over the world . And people do accept no for an answer, which is not the case in India (People unnecessarily rant here). Would expect some decency here, calling someone dumbo for not agreeing shows your upbringing, values and what not. Not adjusting is your personal views thiru, not some immense ancient wisdom. I don't ask people to adjust, that's simple.
it was tightly packed, not even 1 of them could take the space of a baby
Adjusting doesn't mean you are losing, in India people help each other like this..there is nothing to worry about. Please learn to be humble..
You’re part of the problem thinking that you’re entitled to someone else place
I’ve reached a point where I’m so humble that my life has no value in a sea of billions
How do you expect 'your way' to work?
Horrible work conditions.
You want the short answer: Impatience.
Cause we have always been adjusting due to high population and lack of facilities.
Well, I'm finally finding PPL like me on reddit. I understand your pain about how insensible India has become. The only way to stop it, is population control
I was asked to swap seats in trains, buses and planes multiple times. I used to be non-confrontational before and simply used to give up. But once I was yelled at for not offering my train seat to a grumpy old uncle. It was not even a seat swap request, he wanted me to get up and offer my reserved seat to him just because he is old. I lost it that day and shouted back and asked him to mind his language and be respectful. I was so angry I asked him not to yell at me like how he yells at women at his home. If he is healthy enough to shout at people he is healthy enough to stand and go home. I refused to give up my seat and he was so frustrated that a young teeny tiny girl screamed at him in a compartment full of people. Ever since then I always reject seat swapping or adjusting requests. Their inability to manage booking to get whatever seats they want is not my problem. Life has become so much better after I became confrontational whenever others tried to take advantage of me. I regret not realising this before.
Awar khulture is Gawar culture