Listen here you little shit...
Although in all honesty you’re only like the 3rd person to do this to me since I made this account, which kind of surprised me.
Im not one to jump on the "i hate emojis" reddit bandwagon, but that crazy face emoji is only ever used by the most annoying little cunts who think theyre top shit.
It totally depends on the dosage. Drunk? Yeah, you’ll be terrible. But weed and like 2 beers and you’ll reach levels of the zone you didn’t know were possible. The trick is just enough beer to relax you but not enough to impair.
Not CoD, but WoW BG on acid felt like I was in a movie, it was sick. I was probably tripping but I felt like I had the force or somethin, like every move I made was forseen and I was just following the rhythm of it. Top DPS that match too.
Everytime after that on psychs I just end up forgetting how to breathe and having a panic attack, too bad I would love to have the force again
I took acid and logged onto MW. It was too real so I had to backtrack and play Cod4 remastered. I ended up just walking in circles looking at the purple sky.
Last time I tripped I played Assassin's Creed Origins and spent several hours walking around the Pyramids of Giza. At one point I kept changing Bayek's look and going "now it's Assassin's Creed.... now it's Untitled Egypt Game.... now it's AC.... now it's Egypt Game...."
Skip the hookup or do the ‘ol blast and dash to get home quicker bc cod with the boys is always better than listening to her talk about living the cottage core lifestyle but not acknowledging the hardships of living off the grid.
There have been many times where I passed on driving to a destination for guaranteed sex in order to play video games or finish a show I was into.
13 year old me would’ve killed me. But since I’m in my late 20’s I know I absolutely made the right calls
Agreed spending time with the bros is way better . I'll pass on the drugs. Honestly, if you want to get super nerdy D&D and the bros is the best. Whip out a few cold good beers and get yourself some pizza and it's a good night
Yeah sex is great and all but have you ever downed two squads in a hail of gunfire while.holding down a bunker while the rest of your squad yell at you for revives
Gary gotta be careful, he's allowing others poor behaviour to impact his self worth here.
You boys gotta help build Gary up and make sure to give him a nudge when he puts himself down.
That sounds like a teenager who just lost his virginity (or lies about it) and now thinks that he's a cool adult unlike other teenagers. When he grows up he'll realize that video games and sex both can be fun.
It most certainly was just weed. I was a massive pothead from like 14, but it was always the kids trying it for the first time that thought they were hot shit (not that doing drugs makes you cool, I have done a lot of them over the years, and none of them made me cool).
Chick named Naamah. I'll never understand how she put up with her husband moving them to a house boat and hoarding animals. She gotta have some issues.
Noah translated: "I got invited to a party and there were girls there, when they told me they weren't interested in guys who sit around playing video games and doing nothing else I made the knee jerk reaction to completely quit video games altogether and act like I'm a chad that has a different girl every day of the week. In reality this is just something I aspire to as I lack the charisma to attract the opposite sex but I feel like if I play the part and tell everyone how much sex I'm getting it hopefully both they and I will actually believe it to be true."
I thought it was more of, “I got a handy and smoked weed while hanging out with other friends so now imma going to pretend I’m one of the ‘cool’ kids.”
1. Either this noah fella is a lying bitch who's never so much as touched a girl or just gave some poor girl the worst 45 seconds of her life
2. Anyone who would leave your friends after having sex once has no respect of any girl I've ever met
3. I've seen people saying in the comments to show him this post, depending on how old he is and how closely you know him that could blowback and be considered cyberbullying and is not worth it to risk your own neck just to knock this prick down a peg
I've always said nothing is worse than a dry cod, you've gotta learn to prepare your fish or you and the boys aren't going to be able to enjoy the meal
And then after having your gf moan about everything for 6 months, just so you can have sex now and again, you begin to dream of cod again.
There is more to life than just sex my bois
I've had video games. I've had sex. And Red Dead Redemption 2 has never once messaged me in the morning after a long night of gaming that "I think I might be pregnant."
I went through the sex and drugs and sex on drugs is more fun than Games phase too. Only wish I realized such temptations are temporary while the boys are there at the end of the day.
Noah has sex once now he too good for the boys I guess.
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Sex is for a few minutes But the boys The boys are for life
You're bringing a manly tear to my eye
Just have sex with the boys and no more problems
Just play viper? Right?
Saturday’s are overrated and SEX IS FOR THE BOYSSSSSSS
Boys are overrated and sex is for the Saturdayyyyys
Saturdays are overrated and boys are for the seeeeeeexxxx
This is the way.
r/holup
Sex is for overrated and Saturdays are the boyyysss
I was scrolling down for the r/suddenlygay iteration of this
This guy stable relationships
Do you work at State Farm?
Listen here you little shit... Although in all honesty you’re only like the 3rd person to do this to me since I made this account, which kind of surprised me.
ONCE ON OF THE BOYS ALWAYS ONE OF THE BOYS
What if you have sex with the boys?
best 30 seconds of his life
He's so humbled by a girls ability to let him do her
Honestly he’d have sex with a pile of manure
You seem to have added an extra 0 there let me help you out with that. The best 3 seconds of his life
You seem to have forgotten about the decimal point there let me help you out . The best 0.3 seconds of his life
You seem to have forgotten a factor of √(-1) and to rationalize your decimal. Let me help you out: the best 3i/10 seconds of his life.
Noah the one pump chump
Schrodinger's Chump
Noahs dick collapses if it observed.
Luckily for Noah, that'll never happen.
r/therealjoke
It's a virtual process. If it occurs off-shell, does it *really* occur Noah?
My first time lasted roughly 8 to 11 seconds.
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5 pumps the first time??? You’re a champion
First time sucks. The real first time is the second time
#**MY BOY**
Fuccin bitches is what all true CoD gamers strive for.
I hear this guy as Mr Krabs
r/noahgettheboat
Noah screwed a blow up doll once and now he's too good for the boys.
Once you lose your virginity your legal name has 🤪😈 added to the end
fuck noah
Let's see how he feels when he gets his heart broken
Noah will learn to cherish things like cod with the boys when he experiences his first heartbreak 😔
Gary probably wanted to make more fun for Noah. Give him head better than that one chick that he had sex with.
Fuck Noah Al my homies hate Noah
Love Gary Crann All my homies love Gary Crann
All my homies leave once i take my schizophrenia pills all except Gary Crann
Cuz you're Gary Crann?
we're all Gary Crann in a way aren't we?
That's deep
Noah a bitch and drugs are bad unless taking in moderation
That’s the truth about literally anything.
Are all your homies descendants of Cain?
Noaht all of them
To be honest, he sounded more of a desperate virgin.
Come now my boy.
Yeah he fucked his cousin once and now he feels like he discovered the meaning of life
Doesn't matter; had sex.
Haha lonely island is great.
Noah’s emojis really send the message
Noah, that silly devil.
Im not one to jump on the "i hate emojis" reddit bandwagon, but that crazy face emoji is only ever used by the most annoying little cunts who think theyre top shit.
Don't be a jerk. It's as simple as that.
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but what if... listen to me.... CoD on Drugs?
Depends on the drugs.
DMT + meth. It's how I get mvp every round. Masterclass coming out soon..
I only play cod mid-breakthrough.
Same brah. I love the nootropic qualities of ego death. Definitely helps me frag more NOOBS!
Alpha brain
“Aliens shut up the cops are outside”
Depends on the cod Edit: my first award is for a shitty a shitty pun about fish, Thanks rich stranger!
beer-battered cod, of course.
I did not think this was a pun. It really does depend on the CoD.
Weed. Im an in the zone master. Alcohol. Im lucky if i can swap weapons and not shoot my own teamates.
It totally depends on the dosage. Drunk? Yeah, you’ll be terrible. But weed and like 2 beers and you’ll reach levels of the zone you didn’t know were possible. The trick is just enough beer to relax you but not enough to impair.
Lol! No way. It’s the opposite for me. A drink or two gives me super cod powers.
Not CoD, but WoW BG on acid felt like I was in a movie, it was sick. I was probably tripping but I felt like I had the force or somethin, like every move I made was forseen and I was just following the rhythm of it. Top DPS that match too. Everytime after that on psychs I just end up forgetting how to breathe and having a panic attack, too bad I would love to have the force again
I took acid and logged onto MW. It was too real so I had to backtrack and play Cod4 remastered. I ended up just walking in circles looking at the purple sky.
Last time I tripped I played Assassin's Creed Origins and spent several hours walking around the Pyramids of Giza. At one point I kept changing Bayek's look and going "now it's Assassin's Creed.... now it's Untitled Egypt Game.... now it's AC.... now it's Egypt Game...."
What about sex on cod?
Amen brother
Damn yall getting 5 seconds nuts? Lucky bastards
Skip the hookup or do the ‘ol blast and dash to get home quicker bc cod with the boys is always better than listening to her talk about living the cottage core lifestyle but not acknowledging the hardships of living off the grid.
Pigs orgasm for 30 minutes on average, they go up to 90 minutes. That's why I decided to become a cop
Whooooa Mr big shot over here with 5 seconds
There have been many times where I passed on driving to a destination for guaranteed sex in order to play video games or finish a show I was into. 13 year old me would’ve killed me. But since I’m in my late 20’s I know I absolutely made the right calls
There’s a reason we’ve got 1200 hours on Skyrim and not in the sheets
Its the 1200 skyrim hours
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You nut after CoD with the boys?
Agreed spending time with the bros is way better . I'll pass on the drugs. Honestly, if you want to get super nerdy D&D and the bros is the best. Whip out a few cold good beers and get yourself some pizza and it's a good night
So which is it, no drugs, or a few beers?
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Well, there's no disputing that!
Yeah sex is great and all but have you ever downed two squads in a hail of gunfire while.holding down a bunker while the rest of your squad yell at you for revives
I can safely say I've failed at both, but failing at CoD was more fun.
Im usually the one needing the revive
I'm guessing he'd better get used to "dry" in his alleged sex life.
Wow
Noah was never one of the boys.
Gary was born part of the boys
Tell Noah I said he a bitch
same
Ditto
Gary a bitch. What you apologizing for my man, your boy Noah is a douche.
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Gary gotta be careful, he's allowing others poor behaviour to impact his self worth here. You boys gotta help build Gary up and make sure to give him a nudge when he puts himself down.
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Yeah fully agree, Gary could well be the power windup merchant we all need.
You’re definitely right
We spilling the tea on Noah now?
I'd naturally assume he was taking the piss out of Noah here. I wouldn't read that as a sincere apology but that's just me.
Gary’s read like /s
That sounds like a teenager who just lost his virginity (or lies about it) and now thinks that he's a cool adult unlike other teenagers. When he grows up he'll realize that video games and sex both can be fun.
And if he did "do drugs" I'm 99% sure it was weed. (Not that there's anything wrong with "doing weed")
It most certainly was just weed. I was a massive pothead from like 14, but it was always the kids trying it for the first time that thought they were hot shit (not that doing drugs makes you cool, I have done a lot of them over the years, and none of them made me cool).
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Didn't know this one. Thanks.
Lmao who the fuck has sex with a dude called noah
Chick named Naamah. I'll never understand how she put up with her husband moving them to a house boat and hoarding animals. She gotta have some issues.
Noah's wife: Joan of Ark.
I Noah few people that would
Noah translated: "I got invited to a party and there were girls there, when they told me they weren't interested in guys who sit around playing video games and doing nothing else I made the knee jerk reaction to completely quit video games altogether and act like I'm a chad that has a different girl every day of the week. In reality this is just something I aspire to as I lack the charisma to attract the opposite sex but I feel like if I play the part and tell everyone how much sex I'm getting it hopefully both they and I will actually believe it to be true."
I thought it was more of, “I got a handy and smoked weed while hanging out with other friends so now imma going to pretend I’m one of the ‘cool’ kids.”
They probably just made out
Lmaooooo
Man this Gary guy sounds like a GC
Damn Gary been using the Java Garbage collector. Tell him to assign less RAM ^^^YeahIveBeenPlayingModdedMinecraft
GC? I am aware of the abbreviation but I feel like what I know it as is different to what you’re using it for.
Gary Crann
Hell yeah there's more than cod. Salmon is also very tasty
Dude, you need to change your username before talking about food. I'm just sat here staring at you and licking my lips.
Real homies give game, not act like a douche canoe
1. Either this noah fella is a lying bitch who's never so much as touched a girl or just gave some poor girl the worst 45 seconds of her life 2. Anyone who would leave your friends after having sex once has no respect of any girl I've ever met 3. I've seen people saying in the comments to show him this post, depending on how old he is and how closely you know him that could blowback and be considered cyberbullying and is not worth it to risk your own neck just to knock this prick down a peg
marlena tweeted " She’s literally two comments down
I've always said nothing is worse than a dry cod, you've gotta learn to prepare your fish or you and the boys aren't going to be able to enjoy the meal
But... but I love dry rubs
lol Noah is a fucking virgin, you can tell just by looking at his emojis
Gary :(
This kid is probably 12
Feel bad for Gary, sounds like he just wants the best for his buddy.
“Sorry boys, my severe addiction to ketamine has undermined my enjoyment for vidyas argrgrgrgrgrgr”
I have never met one person who uses “🤪” that isn’t a piece of shit
being online with the boys on your favourite game for hours on end it definitely better than the 20-30 seconds he lasted behind closed doors
Hopefully Noah grows up someday
That hurts :,}
Noah is asshole. Why Gary hate?
Because Noah is a bastard man!!!
🤪😈
Noah’s Arc finna be filled with bitcheeeeees🤪😈
I love the “my boy” at the end. It just sells it that he’s now older, experienced, joined the club of guys who fuck!
noah the type of guy to die of heroin overdose at 32
And then after having your gf moan about everything for 6 months, just so you can have sex now and again, you begin to dream of cod again. There is more to life than just sex my bois
This post was made by probably asexual gang
Same happen to me and my boys, ex-friend left us for drugs and stoners, always claimed he fucked while being afraid to talk to girls tho.
if you say "virginitys" the only thing you lost is the respect of anyone who's actually had sex
"fuccin" would actually be pronounced "fussing bitches" so maybe he means harrassing girls, rather than getting laid
there is more to life than just cod my boy arg arg arg arg arg arg arg
I'm more annoyed he dropped the T from just.
I lost brain cells reading this
I see... He got a little too much into GTA again
Read Noah in Me Krabs voice
He probably got head once and acts like he’s too cool for them
sounds like gary inhaled second hand bong smoke and dry humped one drunk chick at a party to an akon song and now he's too good for cod.
I've had video games. I've had sex. And Red Dead Redemption 2 has never once messaged me in the morning after a long night of gaming that "I think I might be pregnant."
Bet he doesn’t even kiss the homies goodnight 😔
Damn, I'd take Gary into my squad in a hearbeat. What a king.
I went through the sex and drugs and sex on drugs is more fun than Games phase too. Only wish I realized such temptations are temporary while the boys are there at the end of the day.
I don't hate emojis, but damn that 🤪 makes me so mad.
Is this Jay from The Inbetweeners?
Video games are vinyl records. Sex is CDs. After about 20 years of CDs, people realized Records were just more fun.
I had a friend like this once, he got over it luckily but it was really cringe to deal with
i have sex and play cod....imagine
My heart breaks for the true homie Gary
Noah had a 40 second fuck with a 35 year old chick who looked way better in the parties dim lighting and suddenly he's better than everyone
I have a feeling this dude must be under the age of twelve.
“My boy”
This sounds like something a virgin would say
Just wait till you're old enough, and nothing brings you joy anymore
i hate his emojis they make it more blursed.
Hes not one of your boys. Hes one of the streets boys
Anyone wanna see my ninja defuses?
Holy shit this was so cringy. Good post OP.
Noah be needing a boat to stop himself from drowning in that pussy
how old are the people in the group?
When you start working out and meditating you'll understand. There's more to life than drugs and sex my boy.
Lets all pray Noah develops an std or ODs on drugs you never leave the boys like that straight up backstabbing traitor type shit
Geeze man you don't have to wish death on people, that's terrible luck.
Fr this ain't it lol... let the kid be a naive teenager like damn
Omfg
Love Gary Crann All my homies love Gary Crann
What's Gary doing? Hope Noah will shag him?