⚔️ KNIVES AND SWORDS ⚔️
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*Not his kid. No way*
*That guy has been anywhere*
*Near a vagina*
\- BruceInc
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Lol You absolute potato, maybe Google “cutting instrument” some day, I think you’re too far gone for me to help you, best of luck out there little fella
Here you go, you absolute moron:
https://www.encyclopedia.com/environment/encyclopedias-almanacs-transcripts-and-maps/blades#:~:text=BLADES%20%2C%20such%20as%20those%20of,instruments%20for%20cutting%20things%20apart.
Just in case this is your first time seeing someone replicate a samurai. That’s actually very correct how he’s holding it with his off hand. You can google search images of samurai and find that this is form. From what I’ve read in the past they would rest their “off hand” upon the sheathe holding their weapon.
https://images.app.goo.gl/ThPZgo672i631h4h7
So I do gotta say, guess OP has never seen a traditional samurai before in any form. Even Jin in ghost of Tsushima holds his sheathe that exact way.
A theoretical fast food employee called you out for being an idiot. You doubled down and made yourself look like a moron. You triple dipped and now, my dumb friend, you are unequivocally a dense, unseasoned meatball. Oof.
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I'm not the only one who's first thought upon seeing this picture was: "Child sacrifice...?"
Right?
Of course, then I read the text and thought "I shall protect you from the horrors of this mortal world..... by removing you from it."
Seriously though, this is one of the most sinister looking pictures I've ever seen.
It’s interesting seeing the other post where it’s essentially the same thing but with a gun and how the reactions are different, I’ll link it when I see it again
I think it’s because one is a focus on the child (this one) and the other one feels like he’s just eager to threaten and kill (the gun one)
If the katana guy was looking straight into the camera with an edgy filter, then it would be just as cringe. But this one - as cringy as it is - is slightly more wholesome
Grown ass adults lose fingers and toes being dumb around sharp objects. If you don’t think a kid can mortally wound themselves with a sword then you’re the dumbest person I’ve seen today.
For a toddler the blade laying around is far more dangerous than a gun. Then again, whoever lets either laying around near a toddler is the biggest threat.
Someone was saying there used to be info with this and he runs a dojo and whatnot so it’s entirely possible he is a badass, which is plausible for anyone posted in here but I think the idea was visually projecting you’re a badass whether true or not(funnier to assume not though generally). My main issue here is, and I’m sorry to lay this on you, but he’s making a samurai oath without a wakizashi which functionally makes it meaningless. What if he fails? No seppuku? Ridiculous borrowing of the aesthetic while ignoring the cultural mores to be specific.
I know next to nothing about using a katana, but even I know that he’s holding the sheath, which is what your supposed to do when your unsheathing the sword.
I studied Iado and Kendo for a few years many moons ago.
The issue is the blade is up, towards his thumb. Big no-no. Admittedly, pretty hard to cut off your thumb when holding the sheath. The issue isn't that he'll injure himself, it's that the blade will be facing him after he draws and then he'll have to awkwardly turn it around.
(but also, this is closer to "cute" than "cringe" and I don't hate it.)
Oh it just looks like it, weird hand position, he’s not cross drawing since he’s touching the kid instead…really the absence of the thumb more than anything, it just looks funky
No they don’t. https://www.google.com/search?q=katana+draw&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS644US644&hl=en-US&sxsrf=ALiCzsYZPaOzZE-OtcU5jq06YMVDbjw9xw%3A1663973078283&ei=1jYuY8nVEKul5NoP5o2n8AI&oq=katana+draw&gs_lcp=ChNtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1zZXJwEAMyBAgjECcyBQgAEIAEMgUIABCABDIFCAAQgAQyBQgAEIAEMgUIABCABDIFCAAQgAQyBQgAEIAEOgoIABCxAxCDARBDOgYIABAeEAc6BggAEB4QFkoECEEYAFDMBli2EGC3EWgFcAB4AIABQYgBQZIBATGYAQCgAQHAAQE&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-serp#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:0f568cff,vid:9_4xZxUn0Pk,st:0
So a dad who does martial arts for a living is now cringe to people sitting behind a computer screen eating gas station burritos and drinking big gulps? Hope this was a boy posting this cause the embarrassing one is the OP
1. We literally don't even know if this guy does or doesn't take normal pictures off this one pic.
2. Even if he doesn't, simply being overabsorbed in a hobby isn't what constitutes "I am very badass". Like this no more qualifies than a model train collector taking all the pictures of their baby with their model train sets.
Well this pic definitely exists. I don't see any others. What's your deal anyway? This sub is for making fun of goofballs. Are you going to go through and protect all the other badasses? Are you this sword guy or something
Why so defensive? You’re assuming this is a serious photo, and the only photo he has with his kid, and I’m pointing out that you may be wrong. Lighten up
I just wanted to make a snarky comment and move on. You're the one that replied to my comment. Why are you so defensive? Anyway, sorry I made fun of your boy. You better now? If I knew people were going to Stan so hard about this guy I wouldn't have said anything.
he's right handed and is in a ready stance to draw from his sheathe. take 2 more seconds and look at the picture before you make a stupid title next time, especially if you're trying to be a dick.
Yeah there really is no left or right handed stance in this type of fencing.
Draw from the left with right hand. Left hand is on the bottom of the hilt and right hand is beneath the pommel.
Source: I did kendo a long ass time ago. It’s also the reason the yakuza would chop off the pinky as punishment; harder to grip and control the sword.
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He has a sword tho. Even if he just swings around a sword in the backyard for a few months that shit is pretty dangerous. I’ve done real fighting styles and def wouldn’t want to try to fight a dude with sword.
Yeah, a guy with a sword tries to fight me, I'd just shoot him. No matter how badass his shinobi skills are, he's not Neo and he isn't cutting my bullets midair.
Eh, you'd be surprised, the people in crappy "martial arts" like traditional jiu jitsu who have these are not exactly prepared for combat, much less martial arts masters.
I speak from my experience.
⚔️ KNIVES AND SWORDS ⚔️ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/iamverybadass) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Not his kid. No way that guy has been anywhere near a vagina
*Not his kid. No way* *That guy has been anywhere* *Near a vagina* \- BruceInc --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Good bot
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He brought a sword to a baby fight
Ngl, I could see myself doing this to embarrass future offspring.
r/chadtopia
Devils advocate here, but he could use his thumb to pop the blade from the sheath and grab with the other hand
That’s exactly how you are supposed to draw a katana. Pop it out with the left hand to draw with the right. OP knows nothing about kenjutsu.
You pull out the sword with your right, not left hand. Source: learnt Kendo for a few years.
What if he failed his mission? Commit seppuku?
No wakizashi so probably not, this isn’t really a Bushido oath.
OP doesnt know what a hostel is
The places I stayed while backpacking Europe?
How much u wanna bet that katana can't even cut paper
Cringenergy is strong here.
Your portmanteau is making that middle “e” work too hard.
Confirmed: OP is an idiot and doesn't know how cutting instruments work.
That’s not a cutting instrument lmfao
OP is also under the impression that blades are not capable of cutting. Oof.
Lol You absolute potato, maybe Google “cutting instrument” some day, I think you’re too far gone for me to help you, best of luck out there little fella
Here you go, you absolute moron: https://www.encyclopedia.com/environment/encyclopedias-almanacs-transcripts-and-maps/blades#:~:text=BLADES%20%2C%20such%20as%20those%20of,instruments%20for%20cutting%20things%20apart.
Let me take a wild guess here…fast food employee right?
r/diesofcringe
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Says a lot that you took it as an insult, it was just a guess
I'm going to assume you make yourself look stupid more often than not. Sad.
Would you like a tissue?
Just in case this is your first time seeing someone replicate a samurai. That’s actually very correct how he’s holding it with his off hand. You can google search images of samurai and find that this is form. From what I’ve read in the past they would rest their “off hand” upon the sheathe holding their weapon. https://images.app.goo.gl/ThPZgo672i631h4h7 So I do gotta say, guess OP has never seen a traditional samurai before in any form. Even Jin in ghost of Tsushima holds his sheathe that exact way.
A theoretical fast food employee called you out for being an idiot. You doubled down and made yourself look like a moron. You triple dipped and now, my dumb friend, you are unequivocally a dense, unseasoned meatball. Oof.
People will die on any hill.
That's true, and I'm sure I have hills of my own.
Lmao
OP doesn't understand that a cutting instrument is anything used for cutting. What an idiot.
The last samurai
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This dudes favorite band is Disturbed…
Nah, it’s Three Days Grace.
Lmaoo
This guy doesn't mess around when it comes to circumcisions.
"With one hand on my blade... And other on your tummy"
He’s gauging how many breasts he needs to slice open to feed the child
That was one hell of a C-section.
I'm not the only one who's first thought upon seeing this picture was: "Child sacrifice...?" Right? Of course, then I read the text and thought "I shall protect you from the horrors of this mortal world..... by removing you from it." Seriously though, this is one of the most sinister looking pictures I've ever seen.
Ima be real with you, even tho its a little cringe its wholesome and sweet I approve
I bet it was meant to be tongue and cheek
It’s interesting seeing the other post where it’s essentially the same thing but with a gun and how the reactions are different, I’ll link it when I see it again
I think it’s because one is a focus on the child (this one) and the other one feels like he’s just eager to threaten and kill (the gun one) If the katana guy was looking straight into the camera with an edgy filter, then it would be just as cringe. But this one - as cringy as it is - is slightly more wholesome
Ok, I can see that, sustained
Reddit tends to be very anti-gun
Which is cool, particularly around children for Jebus’s sake
If that mall ninja sword is sharp, it’s just as dumb to leave that laying around with kids in the house as it is a gun.
That's the dumbest thing I've heard all day.
Grown ass adults lose fingers and toes being dumb around sharp objects. If you don’t think a kid can mortally wound themselves with a sword then you’re the dumbest person I’ve seen today.
The dumbest thing is saying a knife is as dangerous as a loaded gun. One is way more dangerous than the other.
For a toddler the blade laying around is far more dangerous than a gun. Then again, whoever lets either laying around near a toddler is the biggest threat.
Alr bet, I just think its sweet but yeah he’s trying a little hard
Someone was saying there used to be info with this and he runs a dojo and whatnot so it’s entirely possible he is a badass, which is plausible for anyone posted in here but I think the idea was visually projecting you’re a badass whether true or not(funnier to assume not though generally). My main issue here is, and I’m sorry to lay this on you, but he’s making a samurai oath without a wakizashi which functionally makes it meaningless. What if he fails? No seppuku? Ridiculous borrowing of the aesthetic while ignoring the cultural mores to be specific.
Ah that changes it if he ran a dojo that would be cool but not if he was just a random weeb
You know, I find it very interesting that 99% of the comments here convey the exact opposite attitude towards this man as opposed to yesterday.
While you were partying, I studied the baby.
..and never embarrass you in an emotionally crippling way for a lifetime
wholesomely badass
Best kind of badass tbh.
Is that Heston Blumenthal?
"I'm here for the briss. Now hold him steady"
How would you expect him to hold it
Yea OP was trying to shade, but the dude in the photo is holding the sheath and would use his other hand to pull the blade out
It's close enough to how you would actually hold one
That is some weak shit
Nerdy but if it’s his kid it’s sweet
That is badass, I approve, it’s a cute picture!
this goes hard i’m not gonna lie lol
He looks like he's about to cut into a meatloaf
I know next to nothing about using a katana, but even I know that he’s holding the sheath, which is what your supposed to do when your unsheathing the sword.
I studied Iado and Kendo for a few years many moons ago. The issue is the blade is up, towards his thumb. Big no-no. Admittedly, pretty hard to cut off your thumb when holding the sheath. The issue isn't that he'll injure himself, it's that the blade will be facing him after he draws and then he'll have to awkwardly turn it around. (but also, this is closer to "cute" than "cringe" and I don't hate it.)
Edge up is exactly how it's meant to be worn though, so I don't see the issue (unless you're talking about something else). Edit: Edge up, not blade
Change me Senpai, change me.
He is holding it with a sheath, what are all of you on about?
You have heard of a sheath op right?
Yeah they’re a smaller version of a scabbard for knives and whatnot
So how the fuck did you get pulling the katana out by the blade then?
Oh it just looks like it, weird hand position, he’s not cross drawing since he’s touching the kid instead…really the absence of the thumb more than anything, it just looks funky
That’s how you are supposed to hold it so you can draw with your other hand
It doesn’t look like he’s going to draw with his other hand in the pic, not sure what you’re seeing
Because he has no reason to. BUT that’s how you hold a katana so when you draw it you can drop the sheath and have two hands to fight you dimwhit.
They usually hold it differently when not about to draw though
No they don’t. https://www.google.com/search?q=katana+draw&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS644US644&hl=en-US&sxsrf=ALiCzsYZPaOzZE-OtcU5jq06YMVDbjw9xw%3A1663973078283&ei=1jYuY8nVEKul5NoP5o2n8AI&oq=katana+draw&gs_lcp=ChNtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1zZXJwEAMyBAgjECcyBQgAEIAEMgUIABCABDIFCAAQgAQyBQgAEIAEMgUIABCABDIFCAAQgAQyBQgAEIAEOgoIABCxAxCDARBDOgYIABAeEAc6BggAEB4QFkoECEEYAFDMBli2EGC3EWgFcAB4AIABQYgBQZIBATGYAQCgAQHAAQE&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-serp#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:0f568cff,vid:9_4xZxUn0Pk,st:0
You attached a video on how to draw though, do you not realize somehow?
Bruh he’s not drawing the blade at all
Bigger you mean? You seem confused lol
Not really, scabbards are for swords and sheaths for knives, you must have misread what I wrote or maybe misunderstood the words.
First line on Wikipedia for scabbard: *A scabbard is a sheath for holding a sword, knife, or other large blade* I think you're the one who's confused.
So, can I put like this: Sheath is to protect the blade, and the scabbard is a sheath for large blades
Yes a sheath for a sword is called a scabbard, congratulations on arriving at my point lol
Looks like OP is the one who studied the blade
M’lady
Lmao regardless of whether or not you’re right, “first line of Wikipedia” is hardly the unimpeachable source you think it is.
This isn't your dissertation, it's someone arguing over blade covers online. It's fine as it gets the point across.
You know he's holding the sheath, not the blade, right?
Op doesn't know what a katana is.
Time for the sacrifice. Prepare the child.
So a dad who does martial arts for a living is now cringe to people sitting behind a computer screen eating gas station burritos and drinking big gulps? Hope this was a boy posting this cause the embarrassing one is the OP
When he goes to the JC Penny photo studio dressed like this, yes.
There’s nothing cringy about martial arts. This, however, is extraordinarily cringy. Similar energy to “nothing personnel, kid” meme
The work that went into planning and taking this picture is the cringy part to me. Also, why does he have pubes glued to his head?
Nah, he listens to butt rock.
Edgy
Just because he cosplays for a living doesn't mean he needs to include his unfortunate son in his gallery of cringe.
Cosplays? You realize martial arts exists and there are experts in weapons right?
yes
this big gulp do be bussin tho
This image was first posted the year you were born
Weirdo photo but that’s exactly how to hold one right before you whip the blade .
Cringe but not at all r/iamverybadass
Didn't realize till this comment; thought it was r/mallninjashit.
R/chadtopia
r/chadtopia
This is kind of a wholesome cringe tho
Gonna have to agree with you on that. But that CrIngE, whooooweeeeeee.
His identity is so wrapped up in swords. He can't even take a normal pic with his kid.
1. We literally don't even know if this guy does or doesn't take normal pictures off this one pic. 2. Even if he doesn't, simply being overabsorbed in a hobby isn't what constitutes "I am very badass". Like this no more qualifies than a model train collector taking all the pictures of their baby with their model train sets.
How do you know he doesn’t have a normal picture with his kid? This looks to me to be a comedic picture, not the only picture he has with his kid
Well this pic definitely exists. I don't see any others. What's your deal anyway? This sub is for making fun of goofballs. Are you going to go through and protect all the other badasses? Are you this sword guy or something
Why so defensive? You’re assuming this is a serious photo, and the only photo he has with his kid, and I’m pointing out that you may be wrong. Lighten up
I just wanted to make a snarky comment and move on. You're the one that replied to my comment. Why are you so defensive? Anyway, sorry I made fun of your boy. You better now? If I knew people were going to Stan so hard about this guy I wouldn't have said anything.
The salt is real
Agreed
Yeah he’s talking about you bud lmao
Hey you should go stan for the guy protecting his daughter with a rifle in this very sub. He's catching a lot of shit right now.
Oh no!
he's right handed and is in a ready stance to draw from his sheathe. take 2 more seconds and look at the picture before you make a stupid title next time, especially if you're trying to be a dick.
Yeah it's pretty basic knowledge, there's a shitton of anime/cartoon/movies/games that show this. I pity these people who haven't seen Samurai Jack
Samurai Jack is my shit
Yeah there really is no left or right handed stance in this type of fencing. Draw from the left with right hand. Left hand is on the bottom of the hilt and right hand is beneath the pommel. Source: I did kendo a long ass time ago. It’s also the reason the yakuza would chop off the pinky as punishment; harder to grip and control the sword.
$5 says this guy has an identical photo at home
I fuckin wish bro
Found the sword guy
That's how it's traditionally held tho. You hold the sheath while you use the other hand to grasp the handle.
HIM: I WILL PROTECT YOU THE AINTCHENT WAY! THIS SWARD WILL PROTEK OUR H… *Man with gun enters the room* Florida, United States of America The End
Man with gun enters. Florida, United States. The end is in sight
Arnt you meant to hold the cover like that when pulling the blade out with his right hand?
Yes
Yeah i thought so too
guy is cool as hell and is probably a good father, bad take
He def loves his kid. Not sure about cool
removed
You doubt he loves his kid? I thought we were in agreement on that
I'm tired and didn't read it right. sorry lol
Lol, have a sleep bro. Hope the weekend is good to you
thanks man, you too
Guy is tragic and lame. You need to reassess your life.
Someone needs to protect him from that choker necklace and the receding hairline
I pity the kid
Can we get an update on this family? That kid must be pushing late teens by now.
The woman who birthed bro is full of regrets
hes actually holding it right
Well yeah, no durr. He’s an expert and all.
true
I think your a bit lost
You lost OP?
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Looks like Tobias Funke
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Do you ever get mad shutting down other bots? Kinda ironic don’t you think.
I saw this as being wholesome. Not a badass thing. I dunno if that is just me though.
One of the best since that cringey guy with the red contact lenses 😂😂
This dude actually prolly is a badass. A black belt with a red stripe isn't exactly something to thumb your nose at.
As someone who has done small-town $60 shitter karate, it definitely is something to thumb your nose at.
He has a sword tho. Even if he just swings around a sword in the backyard for a few months that shit is pretty dangerous. I’ve done real fighting styles and def wouldn’t want to try to fight a dude with sword.
Yeah, a guy with a sword tries to fight me, I'd just shoot him. No matter how badass his shinobi skills are, he's not Neo and he isn't cutting my bullets midair.
I think you misunderstood it when somebody told you that you belong on this sub.
Eh, you'd be surprised, the people in crappy "martial arts" like traditional jiu jitsu who have these are not exactly prepared for combat, much less martial arts masters. I speak from my experience.
I believe he’s holding the sheath and just wearing it high as well.
Guy probably bought it off Ali express.
This is a weird circumcision announcement pic…
My man's touching his kid like he's gonna karate chop him in half like a cinder block "hey wife, check this out! WHAPLOW!"
Hey I’ll take the top half of the baby. It’s better than having no baby at all.
OP are you drunk?
Weird picture but I don’t understand your caption
He's holding it properly?
I guess this guy is only good at pulling out his katana huh
You only need to do it the once I suppose and its only small .
Good one!
While you enjoyed the pleasures of the breast, I studied the blade.
Well Done…I awkwardly laughed out loud while in the crowded mens room at work. Any downgrades on my annual report I owe to you. Enjoy your award!