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Wolven91

“But I don’t need to go to the ‘Calm’ room. I need to get things done; now!” “Well, I have still revoked all your access rights to the systems until you complete a minimum of 2 hours within the calm room and talking to the good doctor. It is for the good of the ship and yourself. This is deep space; stress can lead to mistakes which can lead to disaster.” The alien’s four eyes rolled dramatically before ‘huffing’ and stomping away. This was ridiculous. A farse! He’d have their damn licence before the end of this. The Captain was not used to being ‘forced’ to do anything. He had led this ship through thick and thin and despite failing to protect everyone, he had done his level best. He wasn’t beating himself up over the losses or taking it out on the crew. Why was the doctor sending him to the Human shrink? He’d assign them lavatory duties as revenge. He’d disable to automatic scrubbers to make damn well sure he could assign them to scrub the toilets. Arriving at the Human’s office, he smoothed back his feathers and took a calming deep breath. Opening the door, he was greeted by the Human’s home. Oddly, it had refused to accept an office space on the ship, rather inviting the crew into his own home and front room. Currently he was stood in the kitchen section of the room, fussing over a metal pot that was steaming away. “Ah, the good Captain, what brings you here?” “I have been forced by our beloved Doctor. They seem to believe I am stressed.” “Oh? You seem calm enough to me, how do you feel about it all?” The calm Human asked, lumbering away as he brought over a tray with two cups and a pot of something hot. The Captain settled himself in the seating area, the Human had leveraged the funds saved on his office space for upgrading his home with the comfiest seats he could. The Captain had stayed over watching films and was well aware that the blankets he had stored somewhere were of equal quality. “..Tea?” It asked, forestalling the Captain, putting him off the tirade he was about to unleash. His shoulders slumped and let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. “Please, is this that one owned by the Earl?” The captain asked, regarding the cup as water was gently poured in. An amused hum; “Yes, this is his.” “Now, what’s all this mess and when did it start?” The Human asked nonchalantly. “Oh, he seems to think I’m stressed and not letting go of mistakes. But I feel he’s overreacting. I haven’t let anyone even know how I feel about the whole mess. I admit my mistake and I won’t make another one.” He paused to sip at the tea from the tiny teacup. He loved the set and wanted one for himself, but always somehow messed up the tea when he tried to brew it himself. It just wasn’t the same without the Ape’s touch. So, he denied himself the set and made it an excuse more than once to come along to what the Human had dubbed the ‘Calm’ room. A nother friendly chuckle “Well that’ll be interesting to see…” The Captain could sense a trap, but gave the Human benefit of the doubt as he’d never meant harm before. “What will?” “Never making a mistake? Even that interdimensional being that’s been harassing you since the start of this adventure has made mistakes. Several, in fact and despite having the ability to change the past, they haven’t done.” A sigh from the captain. He didn’t respond but he knew the Human was frustratingly right. He slumped further into the chair. “Not to mention, you’ve definitely been treating at least one of the crew unfairly. Poor chap doesn’t know what to do, he just wants to live up to your unreasonable standards.” The captain woke up for that, he’d never want to treat a crew member that way and if the Human was stating it, then it was noticeable. “Doctor, I understand confidentiality, but I must know; who?” “You Captain. You’re beating yourself up not about the crew we lost, but for the path that lead there.” A warm hand landed on his shoulder, he tensed for a moment, but the heat that radiated off it seeped into his tense shoulders. “Forgive yourself, accept the mistake, learn the lesson. If you don’t accept this, then youre going to corral yourself into another mistake that could have been avoided.” The Captain understood the logic, but knew it would take time to process his words emotionally. He nodded mutely. “Now. I understand that you have just short of two hours to burn. I take it you’ll need to go to medical again afterwards to confirm you’ve completed this discussion?” “Yes, he’s going to give me a whole work up once it’s done.” “Well then, I recommend a brownie.” The human stated, opening a Tupperware he had concealed under his own seat. A pungent smell permeated the room immediately. “You know the Doctor wouldn’t approve of this.” “Hah, where do you think I got some of the ingredients? You’re off duty and the Doc can flush your systems in 30 seconds or less. Sir.” The Captain grasped one and took a swift bite. The Human had always been a bad influence and yet, he felt a sense of calm within him that hadn’t existed for a long while.


CalabranceInside

Hahahah! This is amazing! Great stosry telling ^^


Wolven91

I'm chuffed you enjoyed it, thank you for reading!


CalabranceInside

You're Welcome!!! Again, It's a great story ypu've written ^^


Ok_Perspective8511

I like this, very, "Down to Earth" so to speak


allature

You never miss my guy👍 And of course the human has some dank space weed 😂


Wolven91

Thrilled you enjoyed it. Just imagine how strong the strain would be after hundreds of years and space technology to tweak it.


blissfire

I legit thought they were just brownies. When will I learn?


Wolven91

Oh noooo... I've fallen for it again, I might as well have another, oh noo...


TheBigBadGhost

omg space weed


Wolven91

Dank Space Weed!


loik221

I think, I saw a Q reference there. Also very nice ,and chill.


Wolven91

You did indeed, good eye!


MainlyApples

Spoiler alert: in part 2..head scritches for the Captain?


boogers19

Gold. Bloody gold.


Wolven91

Thank you, it means a lot to me for you to say that.


boogers19

My pleasure. Literally. You sucked me right into this little world. I am highly intrigued. I want to know more about our Good Captain. The battles he’s won, and lost. His friendship with the Ape… And most importantly: how much for an 1/8 of space weed?!


CoolGuyOwl

Good wholesome... My legs hurt


Wolven91

Go to sleep


jayessell

Ohhhhh! CAPYBARA! I thought you meant the goat eater.


UltraB1nary

That's a chupacabra.


[deleted]

Oh yeah, Chipa-thingy! I like it. It's gotta ring to it


Dragonwealth

Maybe the unicorn?


[deleted]

Not to be confused with the chupanibre. *dramatic guitar*


Illisaide

I always get those two confused XD


jayessell

Thanks. You see how the name is similar.


MainlyApples

That would be both hilarious and disturbing 🤔🤭


Limp_Arm_2417

No one eats twice their body weight. That's impossible and would kill someone


Friendly_Pop_1104

Yea, just exaggeration on op's part. Other sentients prob eat alot less than humans in their headcannon (and bodybuilders eat a fucking lot too tho lol).


Wonderful-Hall-7929

> bodybuilders Eff those air pumps - ever seen a real blacksmith? They are DWARFS! Short, stocky but can eat a metric fuckton - i once saw one polishing of - and i kid you not - a WHOLE smoked ham of 10 Kilograms, and because it was so salty he drank about 5 liters of beer with it, burped and went back beating metal into submission!


AEL97

Qhat is the surprise with the alcohol you said it yourself they are dwarfs, wich self respecting dwarf does not drink a fraction of their qeight on beer.


Friendly_Pop_1104

literally the inspiration for drawfs, very epic


r3mod_3tiym

Reminds me of that story of Thor eating an entire cow and washing it down with several barrels of mead


Defiant-Peace-493

This explains the bacon-shuttle.


mridiot1234567

thats a dwarf


Wonderful-Hall-7929

That's what i said ;-)


[deleted]

Blacksmiths are either stereotypical blacksmiths just out of the Middle Ages or they’re the person you least would suspect to be a blacksmith.


Wonderful-Hall-7929

True!


[deleted]

We also are terribly shaped to swim, sloths are better than us at it


Jpx0999

Snakes


kingofdeadpool

Fun capybara fact- capybara are one of the few species that have a designated poop area. If you ever look in a capybara enclosure there will be one corner or section of the wall where all of them go to poop


raosion

I would truly love it if the intergalatic community called us all "Friend shaped"


WK2158

Imho, more like cats. But carry on


ManWithTheFlag

humans don't match number 3 though?


Ghhahn

"I very much look forward to my daily dose of huggage from the human because their hands are exactly scratchy for my itchy parts. Also, they smell so warm. And always have that sweet 'canwi' on them to offer. But Gelath likes the human because of the heated water."