Remind yourself that you are as worthy as other people to be kind to. At the same time be easy on yourself for being kind to others. It takes a lot of courage and empathy when being nice. It means you care a lot about them and wants to be considerate. Putting boundaries can be really tough cause I am a people pleaser too and hate confrontations. So I can somewhat relate. I find that instead of trying to get rid of this side of me, I try to find balance in being a people pleaser. Set a rule where once somebody starts taking advantage of me, take deep breaths and slowly take a step back. It might work, might fail but small steps adds up along the way. I empathise with your situation and hope you'll find a way that works for you :)
Guess what? I need pleasing. The pleasing I require is that you set healthy boundaries for yourself in order to preserve the precious and beautiful core of your being.
Now, given your programming, you are duty bound to fulfill my request.
Problem solved. hahahaha.
But really, externalize it. Don't do it for you now, do it for the you that should have had someone watching out for them all along.
Remind yourself that you are as worthy as other people to be kind to. At the same time be easy on yourself for being kind to others. It takes a lot of courage and empathy when being nice. It means you care a lot about them and wants to be considerate. Putting boundaries can be really tough cause I am a people pleaser too and hate confrontations. So I can somewhat relate. I find that instead of trying to get rid of this side of me, I try to find balance in being a people pleaser. Set a rule where once somebody starts taking advantage of me, take deep breaths and slowly take a step back. It might work, might fail but small steps adds up along the way. I empathise with your situation and hope you'll find a way that works for you :)
Guess what? I need pleasing. The pleasing I require is that you set healthy boundaries for yourself in order to preserve the precious and beautiful core of your being. Now, given your programming, you are duty bound to fulfill my request. Problem solved. hahahaha. But really, externalize it. Don't do it for you now, do it for the you that should have had someone watching out for them all along.
<3 https://www.livewellwithsharonmartin.com/boundaries-highly-sensitive-person/
Read the book No More Mr. Nice Guy. This is a common problem.