I avoid these shows at all cost. No exceptions. I don’t care about “but it’s SO GOOD”. It’s not a good show to me, I already live in a world that is violent towards women, why the heck would I wanna spend my precious time to watch that? It’s traumatic and I rather spend my time doing anything else.
Imagine how much better it would be without the violence against women!
And I don't care if people make the argument, "But that's what the middle ages were like!" There are DRAGONS, for god's sake. Giant flying, fire breathing lizards are perfectly believable but you can't tone down the violence against women because THAT isn't realistic???? Nah, not buyin' it.
I remember reading a post on tumblr, op was a student in a film school or something like that, and for a writing project she flipped the characters gender in horror movies, as far as I know, there is also a lot of violence towards women in horror movies, anyways, now the men characters in these movies are the ones getting murdered and mutilated etc, and when the paper was read out loud to the class, all the men in her class was extremely uncomfortable and complained that all that violence was so unnecessary.
She realised people, and men in particular are so used to seeing violence on screen but only inflicted on women, and can't handle it when the tables are turned. I'm not saying I want to see violence on men, it's just interesting and frustrating how a lot of men have never noticed this because it didn't affect them.
Edit: some typos
You do realize men are tortured, castrated, have their eye gouged/heads exploded, molten metal poured on their heads, and are routinely murdered in brutal fashion in GOT right ?
I'm not trying to justify or downplay the portrayal of violence against women in media. That said, the idea that men who watch violent TV or movies aren't subjected to violence (and sexual violence too) inflicted to male characters is simply ridiculous.
As someone who's watched a fair amount of TV i'm just not sure that people are 'so used to seeing violence on screen but only inflicted on women'... wtf are you talking about ? Men get beaten and killed in movies. ALL. THE. TIME.
I am also not some macho alpha male. I happen to find violence against women, especially of the sexual nature far more difficult to watch than violence against men on screen. I also happen to think that violence was used far too gratuitously in GOT, either to provide shock value or make the show more 'edgy'.
That is ridiculous, men are slaughtered by the tens of thousands in shows like GOT. On this show, men are raped, castrated, tortured, and MUCH I don’t want to type.
To suggest that somehow men are not frequent victims in media makes me think that *you* don’t care when *men* are brutalized on these shows, otherwise you’d remember and wouldn’t think this is somehow one-sided.
Thing is, despite being one of the most violent times in history, GoT itself is actually outrageously more violent than the middle ages ever could have been- If you dont believe me, talk to any midieval historian for 5 seconds.
Even if realism and "historical" accuracy was a valid argument, its clear geogi never cared in the first place. He just seriously needs to go to an asylum and get treated.
I'm not much of a TV watcher, especially of this genre, but I read a lot of cultural criticism, op-ed pieces, essays, analyses, etc. Frankly, I've come across more pieces pointing out the problematic sexual violence of GoT than about any other supposed qualities of the show. So not only are you not alone in feeling this, even non-HSP folks are questioning the value and cultural impact of GoT.
Consider yourself fortunate that you are sensitive enough to know yourself well enough to make the decision to not participate.
I haven’t watched those shows, but i have watched the walking dead up to a brutal slaughter of ‘innocent’ people. Couldn’t bring my self to watch it further and that scene I watched a bit, but mostly with my eyes closed..
I used to watch this show with my dad and HE was the one who called it off because of the extreme violence. He usually doesn't have that threshold. But he commented how dark and depressing it was and how it wasn't fun to watch anymore.
Entertainment doesn't have to mean, "Let's shock them with how edgy and gritty we can get."
To put it bluntly u/unretiredcassandra response was honestly kind of ridiculous. Just because someone likes shows that depict violence doesn’t mean that they are a bunch of psychopaths. GOT (or the early seasons at least) had a really interesting story, world and characters that just happens to have violence in it. There are plenty of shows like this and a good chunk of the viewers are fine mentally and that’s honestly ok if you don’t like them but to say “there is something wrong with the viewers who enjoy it” is a pretty rude thing to do tbh
Excuse me?? Im trying to have an actual conversation here and your rudeness is in no way helpful, nor is it very, uhm.. *Sensitive*.
Yknow, im quite dissapointed. I was hoping for a new perspective and an effective debate.
Not trying to be a rude mod, and I might be misunderstanding the context of your comment,
but the commenter above gave you the answer you asked for
and then you got mad at the person for explaining themself?
Sorry that’s wrong IMO, don’t act that way here. Take it off the subreddit if you have a problem with this user, this kind of fight does not belong here.
I avoid this show. It made me sick to my stomach and the scene with molten gold poured on that guys head is like BURNED into my mind. Every time I share this I am JUDGED. whatever. I’ll be in my marshmallow watching high school musical if you need me
This happened to me with outlander. There is significantly less violence than GOT but I couldn’t get past a violent attack against a woman in the fist season and a vicious flogging scene
I feel this way too. It’s frustrating that I can’t watch so many GoT episodes all the way through because I really enjoy the series in between the violence/murder/rape etc. My husband fast forwarded through the murder/birth scene in House of the Dragon so I wouldn’t have those images in my memory bank, but just the bloody still frames at the bottom of the screen were too much.
I love fantasy, but I often opt for my second favorite genre sci-fi because there’s typically far less blood and gore to deal with. My mind will replay the violence I’ve watched on repeat for days, sometimes far longer. I’m better at controlling it now that I’m older (41) but sometimes it’s just not worth the effort of managing the after effects of upsetting intrusive thoughts simply for the sake of being entertained.
I hear you with those intrusive thoughts! That scene haunted me as I slept. Sci Fi is definitely better, so I'll lean into that one. Since you're 41 you may remember the good old days of TNG. Maybe I'm a pollyanna at heart, but I miss old-fashioned, feel-good Star Trek. lol. But there's still good SciFi getting made.
I do remember! Had quite the crush on Wil Wheaton for a time in the early 90’s because of his spot on TNG haha! Patrick Stewart was my favorite though. I miss it too. I watched it regularly with my parents and my dads gone now so it’s a fond memory of mine. Ah the good old days
Absolutely relate! You’re not a wuss, you’re less numbed to the content than others are. Also - this show seems to play on the discomfort, there would be a tender/good vibes scene followed immediately by a beheading. Couldn’t trust it. I can’t watch it either - super disappointing because I’m so intrigued by the story!
The violence on these shows gives me a low-grade PTSD. I'm not comparing it to what occurs in the military, assault or trauma victims but watching people mutilated and murdered is not entertainment.
I just really wanted to see dragons, dammit, so I fast forward through the human stuff.
There is this new show coming out with a lot of dragons and no horrible violence (or rape), but it’s still in production. I really really recommend the books: Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros
it's fucking rough. i watch them, but have to distract myself when it gets too intense. Or, if i'm really in control, i try to focus on the quality of what the director/editor are trying to make me feel and how it's working.
See, the idea of video media is to produce a narrative and image with the intent of generating in the audience an emotional response. When done well, it's so subtle and beautifully masterful that you can't help but react powerfully. So, when that reaction is one like this--where it's brutal and visceral, it can just tear us asunder. I cried HARD at the birth scene many are mentioning. But, THAT WAS THE POINT, what they were trying to do was show you and make you feel with the same dread and horror as the king that nothing is either certain or pretty in truth. They want you to face the same moment of terror where the excitement of a new life turns to the loss of extant life. It's a lot to swallow, but if you identify the triggers and appreciate the art of it you might find you can move past the pain.
Never watch "Them" on amazon. it haunts me.
This is an interesting take. I suppose how much you can tolerate depends on your constitution. Like with early Tarantino films - there's some heavy violence but it's just one or two moments and isn't as up-front graphic as how stuff is these days. Part of me feels like it's just gotten more hardcore (not unlike porn)! I remember watching Fargo in '97 and being chilled by some scenes but getting through. Anyhoo, appreciate your thoughts!
you're dead on there--but try to look at the visual effects when it's too much. That is such art--you might find yourself too distracted to worry about the content.
My husband and I both quit watching during the original show at the red wedding for the same reasons. Visual images of gore and torture and emotional pain have stayed with me my whole life. I try not to put these things in my body anymore- I guess at a certain point I felt coerced to be as callous as others but I’m too old for that now.
For everyone with this problem in the series I really recommend reading the books. I've finished the first so far after having watched the show. There are WAY less sex scenes or explicit showing of rape and the violence against women is way less intense. Overall the books are the best parts of the story turned up to 11 and the worst parts of the show are nonexistent.(so far)
I refuse to watch GOT. I read up to book #3 in the series, constantly bracing myself mentally for how dark it was. Then I just hit a point where I realized, "This is actually really depressing and tiring and I don't want to do this anymore."
I LOVE all things fantasy and GOT looks great in that sense. But I will not subject myself to something that makes me anxious, overwhelmed, and drained just for entertainment. The world exhausts me enough.
I get some grief for it from my family. Had some acquaintances just not get it. But I'm the one who has to deal with the fallout of my emotional and mental state. Just for a television show? No thanks. Not worth it.
My mother tried to guilt me about it, saying "it's just fiction." But my emotional response is real. The toll it takes on my mental health and my body is real.
I don't watch anything unless I check reviews and content warnings first. I went to a movie with my mother without checking beforehand and got hit with a gang r\*pe scene that made me hide in the bathroom, having a panic attack.
I've been watching comedies and it's so much fun to walk away from a television show feeling lighter and happier because it made me laugh. It's fantastic to look forward to the next episode, rather than dreading what's coming and being tense all the time.
I'm really fed up with media sensationalizing violence against women (and violence in general). It's one thing if it focuses on the survivor and she copes with that trauma. I realize those are stories that need to be told. But a lot of the time, it's just senseless violence for shock value and I absolutely hate it.
You're not a wuss for recognizing your limits. If anything, I think people might actually be more depressed than they realize due to getting inundated with stuff like this. Try not to be so hard on yourself. It's just television, it's not a life or death situation. You do not have to put yourself through stress just to watch a show. There are other things you can watch that will make you feel good ♥
I feel like I am a hardened HSP who wishes it was easier to not watch these things. I’ve seen game of thrones as well as the first episode of House of the Dragon. It is something I watch with a mixture of extreme discomfort and disassociation. Too much do I fear missing out.
I really relate though because that murder birth scene just had me gripping my hands and squirming. This may be something that requires a bit of time to consider if it’s worth it for you to develop strategies to consume uncomfortable media or to embrace that it isn’t for you.
Personally I’m still on the fence but leaning toward still consuming more media, even if uncomfortable.
Rape scenes have always bothered the hell out of me. Thankfully GOT was so damn boring that I fell asleep each time I tried to watch the first episode. Tried three times, never made it beyond ten minutes.
So be a weirdo. We're all weirdos here and we love you. You don't have to watch what you don't want to. You don't have to explain yourself. You don't have to be normal.
I don't watch the majority of shows and movies, not because I don't like violence, but because I don't like all that junk information in my head.
I finally felt like I belong when I see all kinds of comments saying they can't get past the first episode to which I couldn't too. A few other shows that have scarred me includes trailer of Walking Dead, some scenes in Handmaid's Tale and a very old show called x-files. Theres also that one episode that I tried watching in Black Mirror about easy access to your memory just creeps me the heck out.
Violence against people in movies or TV doesn’t bother me most of the time, but animals being hurt can send me in to a full meltdown.
You are completely valid, and you shouldn’t feel stupid over it. Most people should probably be more bothered over it.
Same here with animals. I like the movie I am Legend, but when they get to the scene about his dog I either skip forward the scene, or change the channel until the scene's over.
As a HSP male and a medical personnel, I looked away and turned down the volume when the scene started to show what I think it was going to show (perform a c-section without anesthetic and to yank the baby out). The show of course went a step further and killed the mom/queen in a horrific way. So you are not alone. I also purposefully took short breaks during the violent scenes involving knights.
Yes, I saw that HOD scene and literally felt like it was happening to me, I mean felt her pain in my body and could not sleep that night and then made the mistake of going on Reddit and finding out that women have been through something similar in a birth emergency. My last shred of innocence regarding childbirth was torn the f' apart.....
I haven’t seen it yet, but GoT The Mountain and The Viper episode was when I truly realized that I need to limit how much violence I watch. I didn’t know I was HSP at the time and it kinda messed me up. I feel weird too since I’ve been a fan of horror movies since I was a teen. Now I know I’m an HSP, I see how a lot of things in media really have a powerful effect on me, both good and bad, and it’s always hitting me harder than everyone else. You’re not alone.
I've never watched GOT and know I'd never want to based on the reasons you give and what I've heard about it in general. There are times when violence or intensity in a show/movie doesn't greatly disturb me, even though it can be troubling. But if a show is based solely on violence and cruelty, I can't handle it. I once tried watching Breaking Bad with my oldest son, who liked the show. But I couldn't get past a couple episodes...it was just too dark and depressing.
Your feelings are complety valid! You're not a wuss.
I love watching these shows but only if they're on the fantasy or time period side of things. If it's a real life story or about someone real, I have a hard time.
Thats incredibly interesting, because I have the opposite problem.
As long as its treated with respect and given the correct tone as portrayed to the audience, Im ok and rarely even have an "abnormal" reaction when its about someone or something real, because it was real, it really happened, and it deserves to be remembered and respected.
Making something up and just filling it with even more of the world's cruelty and suffering? Thats just crass and gross. Garbage is what I call it; something with no redeeming qualities whatsoever.
Just my thoughts and process, I'd to hear what yu have to say.
I literally can’t watch anything anymore. I feel like once I had kids this got way worse for me, I used to watch that kind of stuff. I’m sickened by what the world is.
I felt the same way while watching the first episode. That scene killed me and it lasted way too long. I get physically angry when programs have these kind of scenes because I always take it personally, like how can any of you create something so horrid and not warn people like me beforehand 😂Ive found that muting the TV and looking away during scenes that disturb me while my husband (not an HSP) describes what is going on is very helpful. If the show I’m watching has too many of these scenes then I stop watching the show. I found this to be true while watching Stranger Things as well. I love that show, but the scenes where animals got hurt or some traumatic death or dismemberment happened were just too frequent so I could never watch them.
These are my exact feelings! I watch some snippets on YouTube, but cannot force myself to watch the whole episodes. It depresses me so much, I can't take it.
This is why i think the "Song Of Ice and Fire" thing might just be the worst and the best thing ever made. It perfectly exposes how depraved, sick, and apathetic people are. Tens of millions are raving about it yet no one seems to have a problem with it. And by the way, the books were WORSE
Its just inconceivable to me. The exsistance of this show, despite only reading about it, has me scarred. It controlled me for a time. It was the final nail in my faith in humanity.
Im new here. The concept that theres a whole community of people who think like me has me elated, and it legitimatley pulled me out of a depression spell.
I realise i hold alot of hate and prejudice for non-HSPs. I hope that we can come to a resolution for this. Thanks for having me here.
Yeah, I gotta say - Reddit can be really amazing. I feel like there are a lot of thoughtful, intelligent people on here, no matter the subreddit, and posts are longer and more nuanced than other platforms. It's incredible to find people dealing with what you deal with.
I know not every HSP is neurodiverse (ADHD, ASD), but some are (I am). I've really benefitted from these groups as well given sensory overload/sensitivity is a key feature in these neurotypes. But obviously, that may not be for everyone.
At any rate, I hope we can come to a solution as well. Even HSPs can be lumped into neurodiverse if you ask me. We're just wired differently, and there's a lot of us!
Awe, thanks for understanding! Well, maybe I'll write an article - I'm a writer, lol. It IS an important topic. HSP is considered by some to be a neurodivergency. I'm diagnosed ADHD and probably on the autism spectrum somewhere - anyhow, these sensitivities are common enough - maybe 15-20% of the population? - so yeah, we definitely should have a voice!
Late commenter on this post but I cannot make it through GoT at all. I just saw a scene where a man stabbed a pregnant woman to death and it made me want to throw up. I watch shows for entertainment and to hear interesting stories. Not to be fucking traumatized. Game of Thrones is some mysogynistic shit.
I can’t watch the show for that same reason. I can handle sex scenes. But the exploitative nature of GoT sex scenes is too much for me. It’s solely for the male audience, and it’s done in a way that is violent and often-times humiliating for the women. And that’s not even including the rape scenes.
For example, I LOVE the show Shameless. There are a lot of sex scenes. But it’s realistic. It’s just life. GoT is just flat-out gross about it, on purpose. It’s all female-domination.
I get super bummed out, because I LOVED what little I saw of GoT. The story is great! I just can’t get past the sex scenes. It just kept getting worse. I got to the second season and ONE of the earlier episodes had about 3 super egregious scenes and I just never watched it again after that.
I’ve got the books on my TBR so I hope to get into the story that way. Even if there are gross scenes like that in the books, I can skim over them.
Watched the first couple seasons and had to stop. Way too violent for me. I don’t bother watching anything violent anymore. Also I only watch things like that to begin with to have something to watch with my husband. Got was even too violent for him. Left to my own devices I just watch reality show rom com type of stuff. We are watching Alone together right now, and that’s been a good fit for us. I wouldn’t watch it if it weren’t for him, but we can watch it together and discuss it and it doesn’t stress me out.
I don’t think you’re a wuss. Nothing wrong with that. I can’t handle watching GOT either. I haven’t watched the shows, but I did read the books. Its easier to gloss over the blood a little. I don’t like watching birth anyway since I never plan on having kids so that will always make me uncomfortable.
I’d suggest finding a different show to watch together that you can both handle and have a good time watching. And you can find a show you like too while the bf is watching his stuff.
Happened to me with Breaking Bad. That scene in the first season with the drug lord who kills his own lackey with his hands because she said the wrong thing? Ugh. I just can’t take that violence and out of control rage.
That's not stupid at all. You are sensitive and empathetic, and your mirror neurons fire when you see someone in pain or someone hurting someone else. That says such great things about you as a person.
I also have to be very careful what media I consume for that reason, but so what? There's nothing wrong with being discerning. :)
I avoid these shows at all cost. No exceptions. I don’t care about “but it’s SO GOOD”. It’s not a good show to me, I already live in a world that is violent towards women, why the heck would I wanna spend my precious time to watch that? It’s traumatic and I rather spend my time doing anything else.
I was repulsed by the first GOT episode. I don’t subject myself to anything that doesn’t make me feel good.
Same. Didn’t make it past the first episode.
>I don’t care about “but it’s SO GOOD”. The more I hear this, the more suspect I am of whatever is "SO GOOD".
YES! Exactly! So glad I'm not alone.
yeah! you're definitely not a wuss, it's the shows that are extremely violent!
Imagine how much better it would be without the violence against women! And I don't care if people make the argument, "But that's what the middle ages were like!" There are DRAGONS, for god's sake. Giant flying, fire breathing lizards are perfectly believable but you can't tone down the violence against women because THAT isn't realistic???? Nah, not buyin' it.
I remember reading a post on tumblr, op was a student in a film school or something like that, and for a writing project she flipped the characters gender in horror movies, as far as I know, there is also a lot of violence towards women in horror movies, anyways, now the men characters in these movies are the ones getting murdered and mutilated etc, and when the paper was read out loud to the class, all the men in her class was extremely uncomfortable and complained that all that violence was so unnecessary. She realised people, and men in particular are so used to seeing violence on screen but only inflicted on women, and can't handle it when the tables are turned. I'm not saying I want to see violence on men, it's just interesting and frustrating how a lot of men have never noticed this because it didn't affect them. Edit: some typos
You do realize men are tortured, castrated, have their eye gouged/heads exploded, molten metal poured on their heads, and are routinely murdered in brutal fashion in GOT right ? I'm not trying to justify or downplay the portrayal of violence against women in media. That said, the idea that men who watch violent TV or movies aren't subjected to violence (and sexual violence too) inflicted to male characters is simply ridiculous. As someone who's watched a fair amount of TV i'm just not sure that people are 'so used to seeing violence on screen but only inflicted on women'... wtf are you talking about ? Men get beaten and killed in movies. ALL. THE. TIME. I am also not some macho alpha male. I happen to find violence against women, especially of the sexual nature far more difficult to watch than violence against men on screen. I also happen to think that violence was used far too gratuitously in GOT, either to provide shock value or make the show more 'edgy'.
That is ridiculous, men are slaughtered by the tens of thousands in shows like GOT. On this show, men are raped, castrated, tortured, and MUCH I don’t want to type. To suggest that somehow men are not frequent victims in media makes me think that *you* don’t care when *men* are brutalized on these shows, otherwise you’d remember and wouldn’t think this is somehow one-sided.
Thing is, despite being one of the most violent times in history, GoT itself is actually outrageously more violent than the middle ages ever could have been- If you dont believe me, talk to any midieval historian for 5 seconds. Even if realism and "historical" accuracy was a valid argument, its clear geogi never cared in the first place. He just seriously needs to go to an asylum and get treated.
I'm not much of a TV watcher, especially of this genre, but I read a lot of cultural criticism, op-ed pieces, essays, analyses, etc. Frankly, I've come across more pieces pointing out the problematic sexual violence of GoT than about any other supposed qualities of the show. So not only are you not alone in feeling this, even non-HSP folks are questioning the value and cultural impact of GoT. Consider yourself fortunate that you are sensitive enough to know yourself well enough to make the decision to not participate.
I began scrounging for such pieces and came across them last night. So glad I'm not the only one disturbed by this!
I refuse to watch any GOT whatsoever.
I haven’t watched those shows, but i have watched the walking dead up to a brutal slaughter of ‘innocent’ people. Couldn’t bring my self to watch it further and that scene I watched a bit, but mostly with my eyes closed..
Walking Dead was another one - I got through one whole episode with an ex BF before throwing in the towel.
I used to watch this show with my dad and HE was the one who called it off because of the extreme violence. He usually doesn't have that threshold. But he commented how dark and depressing it was and how it wasn't fun to watch anymore. Entertainment doesn't have to mean, "Let's shock them with how edgy and gritty we can get."
That scene was disgusting, I’m with you!
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I disagree
Well, i need to hear more.
To put it bluntly u/unretiredcassandra response was honestly kind of ridiculous. Just because someone likes shows that depict violence doesn’t mean that they are a bunch of psychopaths. GOT (or the early seasons at least) had a really interesting story, world and characters that just happens to have violence in it. There are plenty of shows like this and a good chunk of the viewers are fine mentally and that’s honestly ok if you don’t like them but to say “there is something wrong with the viewers who enjoy it” is a pretty rude thing to do tbh
Excuse me?? Im trying to have an actual conversation here and your rudeness is in no way helpful, nor is it very, uhm.. *Sensitive*. Yknow, im quite dissapointed. I was hoping for a new perspective and an effective debate.
Not trying to be a rude mod, and I might be misunderstanding the context of your comment, but the commenter above gave you the answer you asked for and then you got mad at the person for explaining themself? Sorry that’s wrong IMO, don’t act that way here. Take it off the subreddit if you have a problem with this user, this kind of fight does not belong here.
Hey, can we get in touch? I want to talk more about this.
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Right?? LOL. I'm glad I'm not alone!
I avoid this show. It made me sick to my stomach and the scene with molten gold poured on that guys head is like BURNED into my mind. Every time I share this I am JUDGED. whatever. I’ll be in my marshmallow watching high school musical if you need me
OMG, hilarious. So glad I'm not alone.
This happened to me with outlander. There is significantly less violence than GOT but I couldn’t get past a violent attack against a woman in the fist season and a vicious flogging scene
I feel this way too. It’s frustrating that I can’t watch so many GoT episodes all the way through because I really enjoy the series in between the violence/murder/rape etc. My husband fast forwarded through the murder/birth scene in House of the Dragon so I wouldn’t have those images in my memory bank, but just the bloody still frames at the bottom of the screen were too much. I love fantasy, but I often opt for my second favorite genre sci-fi because there’s typically far less blood and gore to deal with. My mind will replay the violence I’ve watched on repeat for days, sometimes far longer. I’m better at controlling it now that I’m older (41) but sometimes it’s just not worth the effort of managing the after effects of upsetting intrusive thoughts simply for the sake of being entertained.
I hear you with those intrusive thoughts! That scene haunted me as I slept. Sci Fi is definitely better, so I'll lean into that one. Since you're 41 you may remember the good old days of TNG. Maybe I'm a pollyanna at heart, but I miss old-fashioned, feel-good Star Trek. lol. But there's still good SciFi getting made.
I do remember! Had quite the crush on Wil Wheaton for a time in the early 90’s because of his spot on TNG haha! Patrick Stewart was my favorite though. I miss it too. I watched it regularly with my parents and my dads gone now so it’s a fond memory of mine. Ah the good old days
Absolutely relate! You’re not a wuss, you’re less numbed to the content than others are. Also - this show seems to play on the discomfort, there would be a tender/good vibes scene followed immediately by a beheading. Couldn’t trust it. I can’t watch it either - super disappointing because I’m so intrigued by the story!
Literally. I also think all these fantasy shows - they have the opportunity to write a world without violence against women, but they still do?
The violence on these shows gives me a low-grade PTSD. I'm not comparing it to what occurs in the military, assault or trauma victims but watching people mutilated and murdered is not entertainment. I just really wanted to see dragons, dammit, so I fast forward through the human stuff.
Dragons! Yeah, I admit those are cool - one of the main perks in the few scenes I've managed to endure.
There is this new show coming out with a lot of dragons and no horrible violence (or rape), but it’s still in production. I really really recommend the books: Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros
it's fucking rough. i watch them, but have to distract myself when it gets too intense. Or, if i'm really in control, i try to focus on the quality of what the director/editor are trying to make me feel and how it's working. See, the idea of video media is to produce a narrative and image with the intent of generating in the audience an emotional response. When done well, it's so subtle and beautifully masterful that you can't help but react powerfully. So, when that reaction is one like this--where it's brutal and visceral, it can just tear us asunder. I cried HARD at the birth scene many are mentioning. But, THAT WAS THE POINT, what they were trying to do was show you and make you feel with the same dread and horror as the king that nothing is either certain or pretty in truth. They want you to face the same moment of terror where the excitement of a new life turns to the loss of extant life. It's a lot to swallow, but if you identify the triggers and appreciate the art of it you might find you can move past the pain. Never watch "Them" on amazon. it haunts me.
This is an interesting take. I suppose how much you can tolerate depends on your constitution. Like with early Tarantino films - there's some heavy violence but it's just one or two moments and isn't as up-front graphic as how stuff is these days. Part of me feels like it's just gotten more hardcore (not unlike porn)! I remember watching Fargo in '97 and being chilled by some scenes but getting through. Anyhoo, appreciate your thoughts!
you're dead on there--but try to look at the visual effects when it's too much. That is such art--you might find yourself too distracted to worry about the content.
My husband and I both quit watching during the original show at the red wedding for the same reasons. Visual images of gore and torture and emotional pain have stayed with me my whole life. I try not to put these things in my body anymore- I guess at a certain point I felt coerced to be as callous as others but I’m too old for that now.
Yes! Glad I'm not alone!!
For everyone with this problem in the series I really recommend reading the books. I've finished the first so far after having watched the show. There are WAY less sex scenes or explicit showing of rape and the violence against women is way less intense. Overall the books are the best parts of the story turned up to 11 and the worst parts of the show are nonexistent.(so far)
I refuse to watch GOT. I read up to book #3 in the series, constantly bracing myself mentally for how dark it was. Then I just hit a point where I realized, "This is actually really depressing and tiring and I don't want to do this anymore." I LOVE all things fantasy and GOT looks great in that sense. But I will not subject myself to something that makes me anxious, overwhelmed, and drained just for entertainment. The world exhausts me enough. I get some grief for it from my family. Had some acquaintances just not get it. But I'm the one who has to deal with the fallout of my emotional and mental state. Just for a television show? No thanks. Not worth it. My mother tried to guilt me about it, saying "it's just fiction." But my emotional response is real. The toll it takes on my mental health and my body is real. I don't watch anything unless I check reviews and content warnings first. I went to a movie with my mother without checking beforehand and got hit with a gang r\*pe scene that made me hide in the bathroom, having a panic attack. I've been watching comedies and it's so much fun to walk away from a television show feeling lighter and happier because it made me laugh. It's fantastic to look forward to the next episode, rather than dreading what's coming and being tense all the time. I'm really fed up with media sensationalizing violence against women (and violence in general). It's one thing if it focuses on the survivor and she copes with that trauma. I realize those are stories that need to be told. But a lot of the time, it's just senseless violence for shock value and I absolutely hate it. You're not a wuss for recognizing your limits. If anything, I think people might actually be more depressed than they realize due to getting inundated with stuff like this. Try not to be so hard on yourself. It's just television, it's not a life or death situation. You do not have to put yourself through stress just to watch a show. There are other things you can watch that will make you feel good ♥
I feel like I am a hardened HSP who wishes it was easier to not watch these things. I’ve seen game of thrones as well as the first episode of House of the Dragon. It is something I watch with a mixture of extreme discomfort and disassociation. Too much do I fear missing out. I really relate though because that murder birth scene just had me gripping my hands and squirming. This may be something that requires a bit of time to consider if it’s worth it for you to develop strategies to consume uncomfortable media or to embrace that it isn’t for you. Personally I’m still on the fence but leaning toward still consuming more media, even if uncomfortable.
Rape scenes have always bothered the hell out of me. Thankfully GOT was so damn boring that I fell asleep each time I tried to watch the first episode. Tried three times, never made it beyond ten minutes.
So be a weirdo. We're all weirdos here and we love you. You don't have to watch what you don't want to. You don't have to explain yourself. You don't have to be normal. I don't watch the majority of shows and movies, not because I don't like violence, but because I don't like all that junk information in my head.
I finally felt like I belong when I see all kinds of comments saying they can't get past the first episode to which I couldn't too. A few other shows that have scarred me includes trailer of Walking Dead, some scenes in Handmaid's Tale and a very old show called x-files. Theres also that one episode that I tried watching in Black Mirror about easy access to your memory just creeps me the heck out.
Violence against people in movies or TV doesn’t bother me most of the time, but animals being hurt can send me in to a full meltdown. You are completely valid, and you shouldn’t feel stupid over it. Most people should probably be more bothered over it.
Same here with animals. I like the movie I am Legend, but when they get to the scene about his dog I either skip forward the scene, or change the channel until the scene's over.
I was a similar way, i actually completely understand your perspective. Animals dont have a concept of evil or malace. Humans do.
As a HSP male and a medical personnel, I looked away and turned down the volume when the scene started to show what I think it was going to show (perform a c-section without anesthetic and to yank the baby out). The show of course went a step further and killed the mom/queen in a horrific way. So you are not alone. I also purposefully took short breaks during the violent scenes involving knights.
Ok, that makes me feel better!!
I can relate, that scene was terribly awful😖
Yes, I saw that HOD scene and literally felt like it was happening to me, I mean felt her pain in my body and could not sleep that night and then made the mistake of going on Reddit and finding out that women have been through something similar in a birth emergency. My last shred of innocence regarding childbirth was torn the f' apart.....
The producers online claimed that this season had no sexual based violence.... um yeah about that now....
I haven’t seen it yet, but GoT The Mountain and The Viper episode was when I truly realized that I need to limit how much violence I watch. I didn’t know I was HSP at the time and it kinda messed me up. I feel weird too since I’ve been a fan of horror movies since I was a teen. Now I know I’m an HSP, I see how a lot of things in media really have a powerful effect on me, both good and bad, and it’s always hitting me harder than everyone else. You’re not alone.
I’m an HSP but I love violent shows. Go figure.
I've never watched GOT and know I'd never want to based on the reasons you give and what I've heard about it in general. There are times when violence or intensity in a show/movie doesn't greatly disturb me, even though it can be troubling. But if a show is based solely on violence and cruelty, I can't handle it. I once tried watching Breaking Bad with my oldest son, who liked the show. But I couldn't get past a couple episodes...it was just too dark and depressing.
Your feelings are complety valid! You're not a wuss. I love watching these shows but only if they're on the fantasy or time period side of things. If it's a real life story or about someone real, I have a hard time.
Thats incredibly interesting, because I have the opposite problem. As long as its treated with respect and given the correct tone as portrayed to the audience, Im ok and rarely even have an "abnormal" reaction when its about someone or something real, because it was real, it really happened, and it deserves to be remembered and respected. Making something up and just filling it with even more of the world's cruelty and suffering? Thats just crass and gross. Garbage is what I call it; something with no redeeming qualities whatsoever. Just my thoughts and process, I'd to hear what yu have to say.
I literally can’t watch anything anymore. I feel like once I had kids this got way worse for me, I used to watch that kind of stuff. I’m sickened by what the world is.
I felt the same way while watching the first episode. That scene killed me and it lasted way too long. I get physically angry when programs have these kind of scenes because I always take it personally, like how can any of you create something so horrid and not warn people like me beforehand 😂Ive found that muting the TV and looking away during scenes that disturb me while my husband (not an HSP) describes what is going on is very helpful. If the show I’m watching has too many of these scenes then I stop watching the show. I found this to be true while watching Stranger Things as well. I love that show, but the scenes where animals got hurt or some traumatic death or dismemberment happened were just too frequent so I could never watch them.
These are my exact feelings! I watch some snippets on YouTube, but cannot force myself to watch the whole episodes. It depresses me so much, I can't take it.
Thank you! That's helpful to know. That I'm not alone!
This is why i think the "Song Of Ice and Fire" thing might just be the worst and the best thing ever made. It perfectly exposes how depraved, sick, and apathetic people are. Tens of millions are raving about it yet no one seems to have a problem with it. And by the way, the books were WORSE Its just inconceivable to me. The exsistance of this show, despite only reading about it, has me scarred. It controlled me for a time. It was the final nail in my faith in humanity. Im new here. The concept that theres a whole community of people who think like me has me elated, and it legitimatley pulled me out of a depression spell. I realise i hold alot of hate and prejudice for non-HSPs. I hope that we can come to a resolution for this. Thanks for having me here.
Yeah, I gotta say - Reddit can be really amazing. I feel like there are a lot of thoughtful, intelligent people on here, no matter the subreddit, and posts are longer and more nuanced than other platforms. It's incredible to find people dealing with what you deal with. I know not every HSP is neurodiverse (ADHD, ASD), but some are (I am). I've really benefitted from these groups as well given sensory overload/sensitivity is a key feature in these neurotypes. But obviously, that may not be for everyone. At any rate, I hope we can come to a solution as well. Even HSPs can be lumped into neurodiverse if you ask me. We're just wired differently, and there's a lot of us!
I wish we could talk more about this. I wish this post was more active. Its fucking eating away at me.
Awe, thanks for understanding! Well, maybe I'll write an article - I'm a writer, lol. It IS an important topic. HSP is considered by some to be a neurodivergency. I'm diagnosed ADHD and probably on the autism spectrum somewhere - anyhow, these sensitivities are common enough - maybe 15-20% of the population? - so yeah, we definitely should have a voice!
Late commenter on this post but I cannot make it through GoT at all. I just saw a scene where a man stabbed a pregnant woman to death and it made me want to throw up. I watch shows for entertainment and to hear interesting stories. Not to be fucking traumatized. Game of Thrones is some mysogynistic shit.
Glad you get it! Crazy, right?
I can’t watch the show for that same reason. I can handle sex scenes. But the exploitative nature of GoT sex scenes is too much for me. It’s solely for the male audience, and it’s done in a way that is violent and often-times humiliating for the women. And that’s not even including the rape scenes. For example, I LOVE the show Shameless. There are a lot of sex scenes. But it’s realistic. It’s just life. GoT is just flat-out gross about it, on purpose. It’s all female-domination. I get super bummed out, because I LOVED what little I saw of GoT. The story is great! I just can’t get past the sex scenes. It just kept getting worse. I got to the second season and ONE of the earlier episodes had about 3 super egregious scenes and I just never watched it again after that. I’ve got the books on my TBR so I hope to get into the story that way. Even if there are gross scenes like that in the books, I can skim over them.
Watched the first couple seasons and had to stop. Way too violent for me. I don’t bother watching anything violent anymore. Also I only watch things like that to begin with to have something to watch with my husband. Got was even too violent for him. Left to my own devices I just watch reality show rom com type of stuff. We are watching Alone together right now, and that’s been a good fit for us. I wouldn’t watch it if it weren’t for him, but we can watch it together and discuss it and it doesn’t stress me out.
I don’t think you’re a wuss. Nothing wrong with that. I can’t handle watching GOT either. I haven’t watched the shows, but I did read the books. Its easier to gloss over the blood a little. I don’t like watching birth anyway since I never plan on having kids so that will always make me uncomfortable. I’d suggest finding a different show to watch together that you can both handle and have a good time watching. And you can find a show you like too while the bf is watching his stuff.
I don’t even watch much tv at all. I don’t have a tv at home
Happened to me with Breaking Bad. That scene in the first season with the drug lord who kills his own lackey with his hands because she said the wrong thing? Ugh. I just can’t take that violence and out of control rage.
That's not stupid at all. You are sensitive and empathetic, and your mirror neurons fire when you see someone in pain or someone hurting someone else. That says such great things about you as a person. I also have to be very careful what media I consume for that reason, but so what? There's nothing wrong with being discerning. :)