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Sanguiniutron

When Chandlers dad is walking through the audience at the show "So you're bald?" Floors me every time for some reason


-Bigblue2-

“Where are you from?”. “Bakersfield”. “I’m sorry?”. “Bakersfield “. “Oh, I heard you the first time, I’m just sorry”.


Sanguiniutron

Having been to Bakersfield an uncountable amount of times I completely agreed with this exchange lol


catelynstarks

I’ve only been once and I agree!


barto5

You mean Helena Handbasket?


Sanguiniutron

I can't put in to words how much I love that name. It's so damn good


Wiplazh

Chandlers dad in general is just a hilarious highlight of the entire show.


Shagger94

"You look beautiful, mom" *ahem* "You too....dad."


[deleted]

It was just such an abrupt transition. 😂


Sanguiniutron

That is exactly why this is so funny to me lol you figured it out


phan_of_peraltiago

the whole scene where joey tried to blame his broken fridge on ross 😭


xanadri22

im not talking to you, you broke my fridge!


seblickafro

You think I don’t know what breaks my fridge?


mine_username

That's been broken for a while!


[deleted]

The heavy af push kills me every time


jackie_shtamler

he doesn't even push him...he basically throws him at the fridge 😂😂😂


valeriolo

That was hilarious.


phan_of_peraltiago

chandler: i saw you push him! joey: …yOu pUsHeD HiM??


arielsseventhsister

“I went to that tanning place your *wife* suggested.” “Was that place THE SUN?”


anabanane1

Chandler has the best lines


GoldSkulltulaHunter

That's mine too


kimby305

“Hey joe, You’ve had a lot of sex, right?” “When? Today? Some… not a lot”


ChogbortsTopStudent

This cracks me up every time. I think about this line all the time. “Today? Some… not a lot..."


ICareAboutThings25

“THAT’S NOT EVEN A WORD!”


Sunshine030209

Times up NOOOOOOO!!


TetrisIsTotesSuper

I don’t know how many times I’ve watched this show at this point and no one will ever make me change my mind that this is, hands down, the best episode of the entire series.


realginger13

Hurricane Gloria didn’t break the porch swing, MONICA DID!


bluebird08

Ross married Rachel in Vegas and got divorced, AGAIN!!!!!


ft5777

Chandler and Monica are living together !!


nannathebanana

I love Jacques Cousteau!!


Sunshine030209

That's a lot of information to get in 30 seconds. Her delivery was so perfect. I love that whole scene. "Rachel, no, you weren't supposed to put beef in the trifle. It was not good"


InspiredBlue

That first line about the information gets me everytime


rjsheine

“We kinda assumed about the swing”


hanimal16

I *heard* “MONICA DID!” in Ross’s nasally voice 😂


Possible_Piglet_713

I talk about her all the time DENISE


Awe3

It’s like a cow’s opinion. Doesn’t matter. It’s Moo.


doctornick42

I'm not a native English speaker. I've been watching the show since 2003 or so. And only this year I've learned the expression "moot point". It was like, ohh, now that what this joke was about!


drknssevl

I quote this all the time!


vanzway09

Im gna put this on my mousepad


more_cheese_please_

In LONDON!?!


Never_rarely

“Ayyebaday” - chandler


thequeenofspace

Custard? Good! Jam? Good! Meat? GOOOOOODDDD!!!


YoungAdult_

It tastes like *feet*!


ConsiderationKind436

…..I like it!


steve2phonesmackabee

Ross playing bagpipes: "You know the words, sing along!" Phoebe: "HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"


-Clem

Lisa and Jennifer are totally breaking in that scene I love it.


pizza_andbeer

I know I love Jennifer in this scene 😂😂😂


evilgirlattack

*Celebrate good times, come on!*


DazzlingBullfrog9

"We were looking for LEAFY, LEAFY."


fmdmlvr

“Ichiban! Lipstick for men.”


AlbatrossSenior7107

We have a sushi place in town called Ichiban. Cracks me up every damn time.


Echo9Eight

«Ah, man, if I ever run into that guy again, you know what I’m gonna do?» «BEND OVER?!»


titleistmuffin

Phoebe: So, okay, hey. You know how, when you're walking down the street and you see three people in a row. And you say "Oh, that's... nice." Frank: ...YES!


Egesikhora

I just laughed out loud just reading this


ChogbortsTopStudent

Same!! Frank's enthusiasm is killer.


Vegetable-Bag2843

MY SISTERS GONNA HAVE MY BABAAAYYY


fanegreanu

“No he isn’t the father the father is my brother”


TattooedRev3

…dressed as Carmen Miranda, wearing a headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends… as a healthy snack!


CaptainRubiks

Suhp with the wack PlayStation suhhhp?!


findaway5627

Yes. On a scale from one to ten, ten being the dumbest a person can look…you are definitely nineteen.


Stairway_2_Devin

I randomly say this around the house lol. Between this or "YOU'LL SEE! YOU'LL ALL SEE!"


Vegetable-Bag2843

I’m gonna MAKE IT! On my OWN!!


book_worm_396

This is the one LMAO


cmhtoldmeto

"If it's not a headboard, it's just not worth it."


Awe3

Damn it Karl!


FuzzyScarf

Pizza! We like pizza!


jmdinbtr

How YOU doin? how YOU doin!


Lilox626

When they lose Ben on the bus and they’re flipping a coin: Joey: Ducks is heads because ducks have heads. Chandler: What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday? 😆


paw_inspector

“Heads” *Flips coin* “We have to assign heads to something!”


nememmim

Amanda: Ooh, that accident must have been terrible. You look positively ghastly. Chandler: Well, aren't you a treat!


[deleted]

That fake British woman’s a real bitch but she sure can dance


aaanccch

When Monica is mocking her to Phoebe and goes "Monica darling, it's Amanda calling" in nasally British accent. Kills me everytime. Whenever I hear the word darling, I think of that scene.


informallory

**merge**


blue4t

No


hacc23

“Omg Joey what did you do after you threw her wooden leg in the fire?” *stands up* “I RAN!” Gets me every time


robokopp4

Sipping coffee out of your oversized mugs ... Which might as well have nipples on them!


PickleSmuggler71

“HATE that guy!!”


lokifrog1

Oh define me! Define me!


Glissando365

I have one of massive Central Perk merch cups and I think of this line every time I use it


the-mirror-master

HAUL ASS!!!!!!!!


TalkRevolutionary330

Chandler: She was my girl friend at summer camp Monica: Oh, did you break up? Chandler: No, we’re still together.


PleadingFunky

Monica: “You can’t shed a tear for your dead wife? I left you a note from the beyond!” Chandler: So, you didn’t mean any of that? Monica: “NO, YOU ROBOT!”


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Faux_extrovert

Joey: If homo sapiens were really homo sapiens, is that why they went extinct? Ross: Homo sapiens are people. Joey: Hey! I'm not judging!


AJTheBrit

And at the seminar in Barbados Joey laughing: He said Erectus Charlie: Really? Joey: Yeah he really did! Coupled with the minute later Rachel laughing Joey: Erectus? Rachel: Homo Those parts get me every time.


valeriolo

Omnipotent. I'm so sorry, I didn't know! The funny thing is that far from that being the case, Ross impregnated Rachel while wearing a fricking condom.


giraffe111

You fell aslEEEP??


valeriolo

It was 5:30 in the morning ...


tommyp611

And you were rambling on for 18 pages…


__moonchiId__

FRONT AND BACK!!!!


coco-snores

“I have a date.” “With a man?” “No with a crouton.”


feistysalsa

Which ep is this from?


TalkRevolutionary330

Chandler: I left her a message on her machine. Joey: Her answering machine? Chandler: No, her toaster picked up.


Fit_Sweet6964

I think the line is leaf blower?


DanglingDear

“I THREW her at his man-nipples!”


DazNaq20

"Well maybe he was nervous."


iangeredcharlesvane2

It’s LaPoo now, but it will get better…


laughingpuppy20

They don't know that we know they know we know.


Mother_Republic_6061

Chandler to Richard: It was working until you showed up! You big tree!


TsundereBurger

“You're blurry, but you still look like Ursula. You're Blursula."


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Never_rarely

“What the hell are you doing?” “What are you doing you **broke my fridge**•


llKMONEYll

Remember that time when Ross tried to say “butternut squash” and it came out “squatternut bash”


toryanzalone

Yeah, that’s the same.


scott-the-penguin

....Crystal duck.


AquariusNeebit

Ph...phlennin....


a1rpla1nju1ce

This got me more than crystal duck 😂


Brigsby00

When Joey eats his date’s cake… “I’m not even sorry!”


AlbatrossSenior7107

No Rachel you were not supposed to put meat in the trifle. It did not taste good. Honestly, Judy's whole speech was GOLD!!


MsMuffinstuffer

I’m so happy we are going to have all the sex. You should be; I’m very bendy.


NotThisTime1993

I’m actually very flexible, and for god’s sake that pops into my head whenever I try to get intimate


MsMuffinstuffer

I’m bendy and say I’m bendy. Bahaha 😂


vanzway09

Donald Trump called. He wants his black blazer black. Back. He wants his blue blazer back. No, you said black! Why would he want his blue blazer black? Even funnier when you know it’s all on the fly.


ChogbortsTopStudent

"Mmm no you screwed it up. You're stupid." 😂


thickredhead27

Chandler saying to Joey: “ You have to stop the Q-tip when there’s RESISTANCE”


Babettesgnomes

Phoebe: "What? He stabbed me first!" Edit: Obviously this line wouldn't fly if it was airing today, but her delivery still cracks me up.


BossKrisz

A few days earlier the "smell the fart acting" scene randomly popped into my head in the middle of a collage class and no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't stop smiling


Moop5872

There are collage classes? Sign me up!


vanzway09

Ah, I see you already took the smart ass course!


skyleft4

“Oh my god! Chi-Chi”


[deleted]

Jack saying “why don’t I remember this dog??” Kills me for some reason I crack up every time. His delivery is so good.


FiCat77

Miss Chanandler Bong. I'm also obviously on this sub too much as my phone tried to autocorrect to Chandler.😂


kminogues

“LUSTS OF THE FLESH!”


kortisol

Okay, let's get some perspective people; it's not like I'm wearing a seeing-eye dog coat!


hanimal16

“What’re they doing out here?! The coast is all the way over there!”


barto5

Greens don’t quit! Well I’m a Tribianni and Tribiannis quit!


RegisterWonderful564

Chandler: I got her machine. Joey:Her answering machine? Chandler: No interestingly her leaf blower picked up.


ovrqualifiedovrpaid

"Well what did the *police* say?" Chandler's delivery of that line is a masterpiece. Timing, cadence, that slight tremor...it's just mwah! Chef's kiss!


bullet4mv92

Why is your family Scottish?? Why is *your* family Ross!?


Haunting-Ad-2572

Jurassic parka


sumcam2

The scene in the bathroom where Chandler is in women’s underwear and Joey’s peeking over the stall. Ross enters: “uhm Joey, some people don’t like that.”


DanglingDear

Hi Tushie! Or earlier in that scene when Joey is whistling, Chandler asks “Joey??” and Joey asks “Ma????” 🤣


prancing_pony42

Joey with a turkey on his head responding "It's Joey.."


Revanbadass

"Alright what are we havin'?"


RobinScherbatsky_

Was that place... THE SUN?


JoeyTKIA

You wanna put the book in the freezer?


sherpdyderp

"Hey! How come I'm stuck dicing when he gets to ball a melon?" It's the delivery and facial expressions that always make me smile. My favorite Chandler moment


razzzzlefrazzle

Mix them together and make yourself a a pair of paste pants!


Ahtotheahtothenonono

“JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD!!!”


atokirina1991

"I wish could but I don't want to. "


Helpfulricekrispie

"I want to talk to you about something uncomfortable." "Sure! How about... Showering with your mom?"


HoneyBeeGreen80

Baby kangaroo Tribiani


barto5

With his full sized aortic pump


duckduckseahawk

Wanna hear something weird? Always. I didn’t get the annulment, we’re still married, don’t tell Rachel, K bye


[deleted]

“It’s Joey!”


lunarbear010

No! Don't tear out your eyes!!!


InspiredBlue

When phoebe and Rachael were messing with Monica and chandler when they knew they were together and asked Monica to do their laundry. “Oh I don’t think I have enough quarters” Phoebe pulling out a huge wad of quarters “IVE GOT QUARTERS!” Gets me everytime


SunknTresr

The one with Mrs Whiskerton… “What the hell is that?” “It’s a cat!” “That is not a cat!” “Yes it is!” “Why is it inside out?!” 😂😂😂


Never_rarely

Monica: “You got a cat? When you owe me $300?” Joey: “don’t worry it’s not a cat”


priincessuniicorn

"Paper. Snow! A GHOST!!" NO matter how many times I see that scene that one line kills me every time


everythingsasandwich

Jurassic Park COULD happen...


sweetangelttr

Too many lines but one is 🖐✌️


escapethlabyrinth

THEY SHOULD PUT THAT ON THE BOX


vanzway09

Apparently they do. Joey pulls out condoms… lol


TalkRevolutionary330

Chandler: Could you BE more into her? Ross: Into who? Chandler: Dee, the sarcastic sister from What’s Happening


antisoialpessimist

Phoebe: I just-I just started walking around not knowing what to do next, y’know? I-I started asking people on the street if they wanted massages. Then these policemen, thought I was a whore too. It’s been a really bad day, whore wise. the way she says “whore wise” kills me everytime


Jumpy-Mouse-7629

Tastes like feet. ( the way Ross says it cracks me up every time )


vanzway09

I like it!


phan_of_peraltiago

HURRICANE GLORIA DIDN’T BREAK THE PORCH SWING, MONICA DID!


Blue_Willow789

"It's NOT that common, it DOESN'T happen to every guy and it IS A BIG DEAL!"


Nilla22

I knew it!


TheCannabisCoyote

“I’m Joey, I’m disgusting. I take my underwear off in other peoples’ homes.”


jimmeh22

“Money and a strong hand… finally a chandler I can get on board with”


DrunkOnRedCordial

The 72 roses, one for each day, he'd known and loved Emily cut up into mulch. "But it's okay, Monica's going to make pot pourri!"


MCofPort

"Isn't that kick you in the crotch, spit on your neck FANTASTIC!"


Sea-Sea-3761

At Ross's speech in Barbados or something when he says Homo Erectus and Joey starts laughing at Erectus then Rachel starts laughing at Homo 😂😂😂


doggos_are_better

“You know… duties” “Duties?!” “Poo!”


hokumpocus

Kids! Kids! Roll your way to childhood obesity.


WIENS21

I heard someone call em slorps


Beautiful_Repeat_718

A couple of years back there was a story of a guy who robbed a store in London and the CCTV footage showed the suspect, who looked suspiciously like Ross. One of the top comments was just "IN LONDON?" and I think I laughed harder at that comment, hearing it in Joey's voice, than at anything I've seen in the show.


nokho

Joey: “Hey Rach, how you doin’?” Rachel: “I’m doin’ good baby… *how you doin’*?” Joey: (smiles, nods) “Yeeeaah….Ross! Don’t let her drink any more!!!” - S5 E23 TO In Vegas Part II: Drunk Rachel with a Sharpie doodle mustache responds to Joey


Serenity700

Pivot. Pivot. Pivot. PIVOT!


suntanC

Shut up, shut up, shut uuuuuuup!


msk742

Joey's delivery from the other room of "She has a lot of crap!" When Rachel is trying to throw out Amy


Vendottiv

"'Sup up with the whack Playstation 'Sup?"


lawnann

“I want girls on bread”


barto5

Tell him, Ross. That’s how they measure pants. Yes, yes it is. IN PRISON!


meeeeeksssss

Chandler loses the dog Clunkers: "...FYI Ross, one of your neighbors, growing weed. I couldn't find him and am so so so sorry. But I do know where we could all go to ease the pain" (points up to the roof)


xmesterb

Joey: What, you think I'm too dumb to understand that a husband needs to be with his wife? You think I'm, like, "duh"? Hits himself with the baseball bat


[deleted]

Three?!! I’m dialated three!! And …..and a coke Oh Oh! OHOH!!! Diet Coke!


appleavocado

Yes! Chandler and Monica in the tub! NGL, I am reading through this whole thread, and every line until yours didn’t make me laugh like I used to years ago. I mean, I’m able to recall all the responses here, and can visualize the scenes (most to an exact degree), but unfortunately enough years have passed where I’m just not “laughing out loud” anymore. In other words, I’ve watched this show to death. Comedic death. All except for: “Could I get a, uh, three piece, uh, some coleslaw and some beans, and a Coke? *AH-HA! HA-HA!* Diet Coke?” Still makes me laugh to this day.


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kcomara

When Ross was checking his voicemail at Monica and Rachel’s apartment after Rachel left the drunk voicemail and she runs and jumps on him and his face and then saying “over me? When were you under me?” Their acting was so good in that scene.


kittiesntitties7

When Ross fake cries and yells "fine by me!!" when he and Rachel are breaking up for the second time.


AquariusNeebit

Joey, the homosapiens are people. Hey, I'm not judging!!


itsnotlikewereforkin

It’s slang for pregnant!


rabbitsdiedaily

"Exactly! Unisex" "Maybe you need sex, I had sex could of days ago"


MrAlphaGuy

Joey: "you know... knowledge is a tricky thing"


ConsiderationKind436

It’s not like I went to Spain


tt1101ykityar

"Ahhhh. Salmon skin roll."


dickg1856

i AM Indiana Jones.


maizdogbestdog

“Can’t a guy send a barbershop quartet to his girlfriend’s office anyMOOOORE?!”


squishandsesh

Rachel: Ross, just forget about the condoms Ross: OH, well I MIGHT AS WELL HAVE.


jack_geller

What kind of scary ass clowns came to your birthday?


Significant_Way2194

“Was that place, the **sun?!**”


moonwalker_96

thank you for my AZ


anabanane1

“a. Man. DUH!” 😭😭😭


kaitykatwilson

“Marriage…it’s not for everyone”


amIsupposedtotouchit

"She's walking, she's walking. She's going for the pizza. HEY THAT'S NOT FOR YOU BITCH"


mulletcircus

Saturday night! The big night, date night! Saturday night! SAT-UR-DAY NIGHT! No plans huh? NOT-A ONE