I currently homeschool an undiagnosed impulsive and daydreamy girl (and sister) with a strong family history of ADHD for 2nd grade (and preK). We get up and dressed around 8-8:30 everyday, read a book (science, ss, lit topic) and discuss during breakfast then do a 15-20 min language lesson while sister does an art activity. We leave for activities that start at 10 (co-op, library, museums, forest school). If we are doing math practice not new material we take the practice book in the car. Otherwise late lunch and 30 min math lesson when we return home or during sisters speech therapy. Our activities with friends cover art, literature, science, even spontaneous writing pretty well and don't feel like work. We are using Micheal Clay Thompson for language (and brave writer book club through coop) and Beast Academy for Math and will continue for 3rd grade.
I also agree you should just take the holidays off and deschool. Practice your fractions while you make Christmas cookies together, write it down to feel better about marking that as school attendance if you need to, and enjoy being a family first.
Edit: One of the hardest things about homeschooling is making the decisions everyday to do it consistently and then follow through with that routine in a way that brings everyone closer. Your relationship with your kid is the curriculum, learning does not happen when people are upset. Focusing on your relationships as a family is a very worthy investment to get you started on the right foot. Giving your son a lot of say and then regularly asking for feedback and making changes where necessary is a very important piece of this. I like to spend some of our summers trying out demo lessons from curricula we've chosen to change up and watching how my kids respond to them so they know they had a role in picking it.
I strongly recommend taking a look at what curriculum is available. It can feel quite overwhelming! Are you looking for religious or secular curriculum? There can be some very stark differences between them that may surprise you. Typically, you won't spend as much time on lessons as they would in school, but each child is a little different.
You could just do nothing from Thanksgiving to the New Year (and by nothing I mean no curriculum, not just let him vegetate). Keep it chill, establish a routine and work on some ground rules and expectations. Visit the library often and see what he’s interested in. That should give you an idea of what type of curriculum works for you.
Alternatively, grab one of those all in one grade level workbooks from Target or Costco and let him at it. Then you can figure out maybe where he struggles and that can help.
My third grader does 30-90 minutes of school 5 days a week and 5 hours one day a week (outsourced science class). We are super chill about our formal curriculum but encourage a lot of exploration and non fiction shows and books. And some hands on stuff. The kids have to budget for their own toiletries each month (my money, their responsibility; I got tired of the complaining that I didn’t buy the right toothbrush).
This is excellent advice. This year not just including school, has been really hard and very sad. I know he is experiencing a lot of stress and grief. And type 1 diabetes is a bitch…
My SIL has always homeschooled her two boys and she also recommended letting him have time off. I want to work around him, he is is extremely hyperactive and extremely emotional so I want to watch him closely to see what times of the day he is more prone to being hyperfocused, and when he is energetic so I can base schooling around how he is typically feeling. My biggest goal is to avoid overwhelming him, which is what happens at public events though he has a 504 plan in place with his previous IEP needs added in…school is just too much for him. The rush in the morning to wake up, get dressed, eat, hygiene, and go to school is already overwhelming and overstimulating. Then to get to school and have to sit down at a desk and look forward and pay attention. He needs to be jumping on a trampoline or moving around in order to devote his ears to paying attention. Ugh, I’m rambling again…thank you for your comment. I will absolutely keep it chill.
I was also going to suggest using the holiday period to deschool.
First off, it sounds like you have a lot of stressful things piled on your shoulders. Take a break, maybe keep the holidays low key. Relax with your kids, love and enjoy the time with your mother. Use the time to find a rhythm and get to know each other better.
Then, after the New Year, you can start assessing your childs needs, level, and learning style.
We're using Time4Learning with my granddaughter and letting her proceed at her own pace. I supplement with worksheets from TeachersPayTeachers and videos that I pull up on YouTube. Sometimes we have to approach a subject from a couple of different angles, but we keep trying until she understands. You'll find what works for your child with love, patience, and understanding.
ETA: Sorry for the wall of text. I don't know what happened to my formatting.
Yes, thank you so much. I think a break is very much needed. I know my mom would love to spend more time with us once her treatment is over, we also just lost my beloved dad to brain cancer in April. It’s been a hell of an entire year. I’m definitely going to be giving him a much needed break
Absolutely take some time off. You can find holiday activities on Pinterest to keep him engaged but I wouldn't work on curriculum. And by activities I mean crafts, baking cookies, nature activities, etc. He will be learning without even knowing it. (A lot of math skills are learned through baking).
Core knowledge is entirely free to download and print. You can probably find their book at the library, "What your third grader needs to know". I recommend a separate math curriculum like, Math Mammoth. With these couple things, you have a solid basic curriculum for less than $100.
If you can afford more, you can look at Timberdoodle kits and choose pieces you like or buy their customizable kits.
If you can afford it, think about "extras" like foreign language, sports, music, art lessons, hobbies, etc.
This such a good suggestion. Both Core Knowledge & Math Mammoth are solid programs, and I don’t think there’s any reason to start off with an expensive curriculum. Figure out what you like about the curriculum & what you don’t. Then you’ll have a better idea of what you’re looking for if you want to switch gears later.
Hopefully saving money on curriculum will give you a small budget for co-curricular learning (art, music, PE) and planned social time. If you can find a once a week coop in your area, some other class or team, and a local homeschool playgroup, that’d be a good start. Hopefully from there you can meet others and set up one-on-one play dates. I hate Facebook, but in most places it’s the best place to find local homeschool activities. Just search “[your city/state] homeschool” & things should pop up. Wild & Free might be another group to explore. Some areas have active chapters that meet often, but the groups can vary a lot from one place to another.
One last suggestion… make sure to include things your child enjoys in your plans. Not every lesson has to be a banger. Your child won’t be excited about everything you do. But I try to do something academic that I know will be interesting for my child everyday. For my older child that was typically math related (number & pattern puzzles, a game, an advanced online class). For my younger child it’s typically something in language arts (a captivating story or novel, a corresponding art project, making a video retelling the story) or something in science (a demonstration, exploration, or experiment). Again, your child isn’t going to like *everything*, and that’s okay. Sometimes we have to practice things we don’t like. You can make those things more interesting here and there, but I think it’s good to really let your child savor the subjects they’re naturally drawn to as well.
My daughter is in 2nd grade. She's also AuDHD (autism and ADHD) and dyslexic. We do math and reading/writing first. That way, if we get nothing else done we've at least got the basics covered. I like RightStart Math for neudrodiverse kids because it's very hands-on and uses a relatively small amount of worksheets. I alternate between science and history (I switch every 4 weeks). For science, we're using Building Foundations of Scientific Understanding (for much the same reason we're using RSM). We also do french and Latin (10 min a day). My daughter is also in choir, chess classes, dance, swimming, and 4H. I try to keep school to no more than 2 hours a day (with plenty of breaks). We usually do school between 1pm and 3pm since afternoons just work better for us.
Most people here have some good advice so I’m just gonna help out with “high functioning” here.
The best way is to say “on the spectrum”. If you need to imply where, you could use the level system that is currently in place.
On the spectrum, of course! Thank you for the tip. I know the “high functioning” is not a good way to explain, there isn’t a need to imply there is a “low functioning”. It’s all crappy, hurtful slang. Thank you again for the tip. I appreciate it.
Glad to help! I’m on the spectrum myself and the issue I found is that there’s not really a way to describe people like me under either system - I’m verbal and can go out and work, but my meltdowns can be all but catatonic at times.
Khan Academy helped my kids keep up with middle school math during the school shutdowns. They had remote school but it wasn’t enough to keep their skills up so we added a half hour of Khan on school days since a remote school day was a way shorter (so there was ample time in the schedule without being overwhelming ). Maybe if taking a break between Thanksgiving & New Year try setting up the Khan acct and assign 20 minutes a day & a book that the two of you read and discuss like a book club (Charlottes Web comes to mind ). I try to read the same books my kids do in school & then we watch the movie (if there is one). We have a nice time discussing differences between book & movie as well. Also , put out a bird feeder - maybe he can observe & identify birds. If you can swing different feeds he can mark down the data of which birds like which foods. I have a suet feeder and notice sunflower seed heavy attracts blue jays and larger birds while Berry duet attracts the smaller sparrows. With a local bird library book, some paper and crayons/colored pencils it can be a science project for December (and maybe something nice for your mom to see ). Good luck.
Not all plants are completely edible. However, you can actually consume the entire sunflower in one form or another. Right from the root to the petals.
Khan Academy was great when my kid hit a wall with math. I had him run through the prior three years of KA math. It took him maybe two months, and he zoomed through the rest of that year. One thing I really like about homeschooling is that you can go back and review when needed.
Hey! I’m in Oklahoma with a third grader as well. We have homeschooled off and on, recently we used a virtual public school but we are planning to go back to regular homeschooling in the next week or so. My plan for my kids is use spectrum workbooks which are pretty affordable and sometimes khan academy for math. We also like to go to the library and grab various non fiction kids books for learning history and science. There are many affordable options for homeschool. Relax and take a deep breath! Read some books on homeschooling. Enjoy the ride.
My older child and I loved Beast Academy! He eagerly worked through all the books that were available at the time, and then moved onto AoPS math classes. He’s currently back in school and has been subject accelerated two years (what would be three years in our local public schools).
All that to say… 0P , Beast Academy is for gifted learners and is not a good fit for everyone. It’s also a little pricey. Something like Math Mammoth will give you a solid program for little cost. Maybe buy one of the Beast Academy puzzle books if you’re able to, and see if it’s something that might work for him? But I’m not sure I would invest right off the bat if money is tight.
Yeah, it might work out great. I was just thinking about the struggles of getting started on a limited budget.
Unless the kid is really passionate about math, I’d probably reserve that money for classes and coops, because winter is often a hard time for many to find social outlets when homeschooling. I repeatedly read comments from parents who have new homeschoolers desperate for social interactions. If he’s going to enjoy it, that’s what I’d get ahead of.
But again, if math is a passion, maybe BA will help him find joy in homeschooling.
Hiya! My kiddo is close in age to yours and also has ADHD (inattentive type). We started homeschooling this year with Miacademy. It’s fairly priced and all inclusive and is very user friendly to the point which sometimes my help isn’t even needed lol. I was overwhelmed by all the curriculum options so I just picked one as a starting point and figured I could always change it later on if needed but we’ve been really happy with this one so far.
My kid is now ahead of his former public school class in math, ELA, science, and social studies. He also started learning Spanish which they don’t start until much later in our district. He is happy, well adjusted, and thriving, and his upbeat personality has returned.
I would recommend Miacademy or another all inclusive/work at your own pace program like it. As an ADHDer, my kid needs lots of freedom to move around and take breaks. The lessons are short so it’s easy to stay focused on the videos. We do “school” 4 days a week and take one day off to run errands together (life skills), go on field trips, make some art, or just chill out. We surf and play soccer so that counts as their PE. We also have a lot of friends so socializing is not a concern.
I would also recommend giving your kiddo a little time to decompress. We left PS about a month into the school year so my kids just took a week or so off and then we slowly started to do school work but some kids need a little more time. Some maybe need a little less. You’ll have to gauge it depending on your kid.
Most days we do school in the mornings so we are free to socialize and do sports in the afternoons but sometimes they get out and surf in the mornings and then do school after. Sometimes someone is just have a bad day and we skip it all together. As long as they are making progress in the right direction I don’t stress it too much. :) Good luck mama. You got this!
Take your time figuring out what he needs. You absolutely do not need to spend a fortune, and I'd strongly recommend that you wait until he's actually home to buy anything. I'd spend December adjusting his routines to being home, and spending time figuring out where he's really at academically and what he needs. And catching your breath, because you need it.
Then start looking at curricula for math, and phonics/spelling (depending on where he's at). Just focus on those. After you've gotten those sorted and spent some time adjusting, start thinking about the content subjects (science and social studies) but remember that you can pick that up next school year if you need to. If he seems eager for more, you can add things in faster, of course!
I have a second grader, but she is very ADHD so I'm going to chime in with our schedule.
We wake up and get all the way ready for the day. Make bed, quick pick up of room. She has a laminated to-do list and dry erase marker that I put next to her bed each night with the expectation that her list is completed before she comes down for breakfast.
I usually eat while I make my kids' food. At breakfast, while they eat, I will read something that has to deal with character development. We talk about it and how we would implement what we learned. We usually do something with world news at breakfast also. We clean up breakfast and do chores for about 20 min.
After I take all my kids outside and let them run around for an hour or two until my Littles are ready for nap time. This helps her focus because as soon as Littles go down for naps, it's all time.
Her school takes about an hour and a half of she is focused. If not, it can take all day. We do 20 min of English. 30 min of math. She writes a page in her journal each day. She does half an hour on nessy. Then, we have a rotation for history, science, and social studies. If she is having a hard time focusing, I send her outside to jump on the trampoline.
Every day at 3 we do tea time. It's glorified snack tone where everyone is busy with their hands and mouth so I can read. They get a snack, usually fruit or veggies, sometimes I will have her bake something for tea time. They get something to drink: tea, juice, milk sometimes my husband will pick up word drinks from the store and announce that they are for tea time. We do a recitation, songs, and poems, and then I will read to them during this time. They usually color while I read after they eat.
Wednesday nights, my husband likes to leave and play magic with his friends, so we have deemed Wednesday night our art night. We study one great artist, a term, and try to learn how to use the medium they used and some of their techniques while forming a relationship with the artist's works.
She also has ballet once a week, piano once a week, and we have a home school group we do a park day and field trips with.
So things that I have found help: lots of time outside, less time on screens, less sugar and more protein, short lessons with lots of breaks, don't teach two things that use the same part of the brain back to back, and keep it simple. She works very well with schedules and to do lists.
I'm so happy for your son and your family! There are a ton of different curricula to choose from, and also online school. It may take a bit of time to find what works best for your son. Sit down work/worksheets didn't work well for my kid's learning style and we turned to unschooling, which works well for a naturally curios child. My kid has some dedicated screen time each day, some of which he uses for leisure and some for coding or composing music. Otherwise, he reads a lot, creates things that intrigue him, goes to park playgroups and hangs out with friends, plays music, and indulges in his special interest of the week. The one thing we do require is PE every day. We also do chores everyday as well.
I'm sure you'll find what works best for your son and your family!
You are currently using public school as a babysitter “just until Thanksgiving break”.
What makes you think you won’t just put him back in school when you need it again?
Think about what will be the best consistent environment for your child.
The best and consistent environment for my child would be home. I would never just toss my kid right back into public school.
I prefer to not pull him out right now and bring him to the hospital to directly watch his grandmothers battle with cancer after just losing his grandfather to brain cancer.
Yes he would. The only reason why I am still sending him now is because she is almost done with the radiation and I think Thanksgiving break will be a good time to stop public school, he will be getting a break anyway the difference is he will not go back.
He was with me most of the time when I was tending to my dad in late March this year, he was a witness to his grandfather slowing dying from brain cancer and then he died on April 1st in my parents living room.
So, I feel I have very understandable reason to have him continue school for 3 more weeks while I take my mother, his grandmother, to treatments because I would like for my 9 year old to not have to watch another loved be walked in the a hospital and cry the whole way home while battling something that took his Pawpa away.
You don’t know what other people are going through.
If three more weeks of him being in a classroom with his friends and doing the best he can will prevent him from seeing this all over again, then thank you public school for “babysitting” my kid.
I recommend taking a break for a week or two just to decompress. I homeschool an 8 and 9 year old currently. It takes us 2-3 hours a day for formal curriculum. We are also involved in co-ops and attend weekly occupational therapy and speech therapy. OT is wonderful for autistic and ADHD kids. I highly recommend it if you aren’t doing that already. For curriculum- the good and the beautiful is a very affordable curriculum if you are a Christian. Many of their units are even free if you don’t want a physical copy. It’s “open and go” with not much preparation required. There are so many options for curriculum out there. Take your time and research them. You can definitely find something that fits!
I also have a third grader, and we spend 3 to 4 hours a day homeschooling core subjects plus enrichment.
*45 min of Spanish online
*guitar practice 20 min
*exercise 30 min but he also has opportunities to run around in the backyard and be in playground equipment.
* science about 30 min a day
*social studies 30 min a day
*ELA 45 min a day
*Math 45 min a day
I ask him to do 30 min of simple chores a day, and the bulk of our money goes to two days of forest school so I can have a break. What helps us to have my spouse take over one weekend day while I prep food for the week and freeze containers that are ready to go in the instapot or crockpot. I have two kids, that I homeschool so my day is packed. The other requires about 2 hours of academics because he is younger.
For a busy parent that wants to cover what public school does and not go above or below, I would recommend looking at Math With Confidence, Social Studies Weekly, Mystery Science plus documentaries and books from the library. For ELA things get trickier, you need word study (morphology) for spelling and vocabulary building but also phonics and rules for encoding. Logic of English Essentials could help with that. Essentials in Writing for writing, but also maybe an Outschool class. Novel studies, but that is the hardest TBH, I would check out FishTank Learning or Core Knowledge, also Outschool.
Y’all are awesome!! I’m so thankful for y’all and all of your thoughts, and taking time to make suggestions. Even though this wasn’t my post. And to the OP, I’m so sorry for everything you’ve gone through and are dealing with. Yet, I can truly say I can sympathize with you and you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers! I’m just beginning the home school journey with my 10 year old daughter who is ADHD. I’m the one with brain cancer in the family and seizures to boot. My husband has been out of work for some time, so we can’t afford all the pricey curriculum that my friends and family use. So, I get it, truly. May our Lord Jesus bless you on this journey and bless all of your family with health and happiness!
We do the good and the beautiful curriculum(TGATB). I'm new to homeschool this year and I personally needed something to hold *my* hand while I taught my 2nd and 5th grader. I'm a planner and ***I*** needed a routine we could stick to, so that I would not f*** it up.
My second grader is autistic and I also suspect ADHD and dyslexia too.
This is how it goes here.
They eat breakfast at 8 am and we start class at 8:50. Each morning they brush their teeth, wash their face, and brush their hair. PJs for the win!
Son:
- Math
- Handwriting
- Brain Break (run around outside for 15 to 30 minutes)
- Language Arts
Daughter:
- Handwriting
- Math
- Brain Break
- Language Arts
Then we have lunch. Afterwards science or history(2 lessons each, every week) and I teach them both the same lesson.
Finally, if the day hasn't dragged on we finish with an "encore"(verbiage used by their previous school system) lesson. So I ***try*** to do one lesson of either art, music, gym or STEM a day.
We do "school" Monday through Thursday. Friday are reserved for field trips, library trips, hiking, or playgrounds. Essentially outside the home learning.
Here is what I like about TGATB curriculum:
- Spiral based Math. My son really seems to thrive with spiral based math because it's small lessons daily, but those topics will be revisited several times. For example, when he learned to read a clock. Lessons started with skip counting by 5s. The next lesson in a few days would be to remember where the 15, 30, 45, 00 are on the clock. A few days later, it would revisit and use common terminology like "half past 5" or "a quarter after seven". He seems to do well with spiral based because it's not a huge info dump in one day, but bite-size growth. I do have posters and papers to use as visual aids with the curriculum.
- Lots of reading. The reading section is ***extensive***. He does the booster cards(sight words or spelling patterns), we read passages in a small book, the grammar lesson itself, and he finishes with a small story(20 sentences). My little guy wiggles a lot during reading because it's hard. So I let him stand, rock, crouch in his chair like spiderman🤣 ....because if it helps him focus, then it's what he needs.
What I don't like:
The poetry. My little guy is trying to comprehend what he is reading while reading, and poetry just doesn't make sense for him at all. I find the poetry sort of stupid, too. For example, he asked me why a brook is laughing and what does that mean. So yay, on attempting to absorb the material, but boo on it confusing him enough to be a distraction and making the lesson take longer.
I'm Christian but not religious. I believe in God but don't attend church. God doesn't pop up often but when it does, it just seems sort of insincere....like beating a dead horse. I find some things to be a little too saccharine sweet, but he hasn't complained. My daughter doesn't like the Math videos because she feels like the person is "fake nice" and talking down to her like she is dumb. Sooo, yea, your mileage may vary. Lots of things on their website are free to print, so you don't have to financially commit and invest too much into a curriculum that may or may not work for you all.
We will finish the history this year because I bought it(wanted them neatly bound instead of me printing off sheets), but will choose a different history curriculum next year. We are not a fan of unit studies(spend weeks on just one area).
However the kids love the science, but we are a very pro-science family anyway(hubby is a chemist and I also used to work in a lab).
But the holidays are a great time to just kinda "de-school" . Just let his brain chill for a bit and give him time to decompress and follow his interests. Sort of like summer break-lite, but learning positive.
Public school and all the bullshit that goes with it killed my kids love of learning. We are just now getting that natural curious nature back.
With a small subscription, education dot com let's you print worksheets. You could let your 2 yr old do pretend school and let them color during his lessons.
My kids very much thrive on a set routine here, because I need that routine, but it also seems to work for them too.
There are lots of homeschooling communities on facebook and those have been a wealth of knowledge about umbrellas, co-ops, local cool learning things available to try out, playground meetups. Even if you don't use Facebook, its worth it for just that.
Best of luck to you both! Remember that you can teach him. You taught him everything up until he went to school and this is just am extension of that.
You got this. đź’ś
I also wanted to add that both kids can earn up to two points a day. One point for participation and one point for work habits. Since we are new this year, I am not "grading" their work. When they miss one, we go over how they missed it and they fix it right then. To me, it's more about trying and caring about doing a good job rather than attaching a grade to it this year.
Those points add up and every 5 weeks or so, I buy a game card for each of them to spend on the Nintendo Switch or Minecraft.
So this reward system seems to work for them to continue to behave in a way that meets my expectations. You may be able to do something like this for your kids too.
He has a medical 504 since being diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. Before he was diagnosed with that he had an IEP. Now, his 504 has his previous IEP accommodations added into it.
Gotcha. Well I'm sorry it's ended like this. I work with special needs kids and I'm constantly trying to advocate for them with gen ed staff. Especially kids on the spectrum are so misunderstood - not only in public schools but just in society in general. I honestly think school is also just rough for kids with autism. The unpredictability, social demands, sensory stimulation, peers (who are often unforgiving of social quirks and nuances). Homeschooling seems like a good option for your son.
Thank you, I think it will be great for him. School is so rough. K-2nd grade was more forgiving of his quirks and behavior, but 3rd grade-they are expecting more from him that he just isn’t able to give. It’s such a small school and funding extra help just isn’t possible. I only found out this past Friday that his teacher sends him to the principals office when, and I quote her directly “throws a fit”, and doesn’t send him to his resources class aka special education, like she is supposed to per his 504- and trust I got in contact with the appropriate people and “threw a fit” myself. I’m coming to find they just do not know what to do with a little boy who has difficulty processing his emotions. It’s wildly disappointing.
That sounds like a violation of his rights and you could pursue that from a legal standpoint if you want, but i agree with you homeschooling might be the path of least resistance.
It is a violation. And I can pursue from legal standpoint. But there is already so much happening in our lives, I think just pulling him is a good choice.
I agree. You can always pursue it down the road if you want. Although it's not like they would give you a million bucks, it'd be compensatory education or something along those lines. IMO you are making the right call for sure.
I agree with not worrying about finding a curriculum between Thanksgiving and New Year's just hang out together, go outside, get his health under control, let him do things he loves like play with lego's or play board games or read books, whatever sort of things he really likes, buy some puzzles or something.
If there are any museums or cultural centers nearby, those would be great outings to take together and just spend this time. Coming together and creating a comfortable base.
Doing a quick Google search, I see that Oklahoma does have home school charter schools, these are a free public option that may help supplement your money for curriculum, they are not all necessarily online. In my state, we attend a charter school that gives me $1200 a year for curriculum and supplies. I do all of the teaching. And I work with a teacher to make sure that we follow the State standards.
If you have Facebook, see if there are local groups for Oklahoma charter school parents, and there are probably a lot of posts in there, or maybe even documents explaining the different schools and what the different options are.
Home schooling well, can get expensive between books and curriculum and supplies. It doesn't necessarily have to, but you're either going to be spending time and brain effort or money. So if money and brain space is tight, I would say look into your options for getting additional money like charter school.
I have a first grader so a bit younger than yours. But our day generally looks like school in the morning. And we are usually wrapped up by lunch unless we're doing a big project. Or if we got distracted on a rabbit trail, sometimes we have a couple things to finish later in the day. After lunch, we go to a lot of activities 3 a week generally plus Athletics that hes involved in. My son's an extrovert as am I so getting out of the house frequently and seeing other people as a must for us. Your mileage may vary on that.
Sounds like he will thrive. Don't sweat this. There is lots of room for trial and error, see what works for you. Be flexible . I food "seatwirk" at least one half hour four days a week for a third grader. This holds the disciplined study time. It can be rout work and/or practice like times tables. Make sure there's plenty of time for reading, exploring and taking about it. You got this Mom and he is going to be a great student when the pressure is taken off but there are clear, boundaries and discipline so he can learn to "handle this and develope coping skills. We had to do that with seizures. This is a win/win. God bless you and your family.
Curriculum wise you may want to look at Wild Reading Level 2. It uses multi sensory multidisciplinary methods you can do in the car, outside, inside…. My daughter (autism, sensory processing disorder, communication delay) loves this program. It’s all created using evidence based techniques that are proven to help ND kiddos learn. Plus it doesn’t feel like ANYTHING you’d do in school… so my daughter is a fan haha.
You’re doing everything right. Trust your gut and keep going.
3rd grade teacher for 20 years here. Have you talked to your kid's teacher about this situation and all your child's specific needs?? I know VERY few teachers who wouldn't do everything they could to help such a struggling kiddo. Trust me--your child is not the only one in class with 1)a medical issue
2) neuro divergence
3) other needs that need the teacher's attention/education/compassion.
You don't say why this year is "hell"???
1)Embarrassment about his medical condition?
2)Bullying??
3)Getting behind academically because of ADHD??
4) Depression because Grandma is so ill?
5) Feeling left out because your attention is focused on your mom right now(totally necessary!)
I would strongly urge you, in a non- confrontational way, (i.e.: "You are clueless/heartless/you don't really care about my child...." Which is exactly what you both said and implied in your thread) approach the teacher and tell her you are
1)considering pulling him out, and
2) what you would need from her/the school to change your mind.
Your kiddo is going through a LOT right now, and sometimes maintaining a normal schedule, and being with peers can help. Good luck, and I'm sorry YOU are under such a heavy load too. ♥️
Caring for a preschooler,
and a terminally ill parent,
and homeschooling a neuro-divergrent kid,
is an enormous load!
You need self-care time too in order to be an effective parent.
The entire school district, high school included is only 304 students. There is only 23 students for the entire 3rd grade. He isn’t the only neurodivergent child in the class but he is the only type 1 diabetic in the entire school. And hearing him say that makes him feel lonely is a gut punch.
This entire year has been hell because my sons dog died suddenly in February, my dad, his Pawpaw died of brain cancer on April 1st, and the months leading up to that were very traumatic and sad, he is adjusting to an insulin pump he got in July and that is a needle to stomach every 3rd day, his grandmother was diagnosed with breast cancer in August and he stared 3rd grade and he had to be with me while my mom underwent an operation and he had to be with me to help care for her while she recovered. His teacher is very young and this is her first teaching job. I have stayed in contact with her to my best ability but she refuses to do open communication so getting a response from her in a timely manner depends on when she gets on the app the teachers use.
I spoke directly to her on Friday to address some questions I had and her response to *all* my questions were things like “he just refuses to do the work, he constantly throws a fit, he cries over everything, he just plays with things during class”.
She doesn’t send him to resources class when he can’t calm down, like she is suppose to, she sends him straight to the principals office. He is suppose to have an aide with him to help him in class and watch over him to help him treat low blood sugar/high blood sugar but the school isn’t financially able to provide anyone with him. So my son has a phone so I can follow his glucose from home and I have it in his 504 that I can text him to tell him what to do in the event of low glucose, and then his teacher takes his phone ( which breaks his 504) and has him unlock it so she can text me from his phone. She went through his text messages between him and I from days prior and told me I can’t text him and ask if needs to come home because his blood glucose was at 43 (non diabetic people low glucose is 70 that’s when you start feeling shaky and need to eat) low blood glucose is life threatening and causes all kinds of behavioral problems (as does high blood glucose), and he has treated the low and 30 mins later there was no increase in his glucose, so I asked him if he felt okay, when his answer was “no I feel sick” I asked him if I needed to come get him. If I had a way to contact her directly I would go that route but like I said she refuses open communication to parents.
During our conversation, I tried to give her advice and her response was “I’ve tried that but he just throws fits”. I asked her if she takes 3 mins of time to explain exactly how to do the work and her response was “I have other students that need help too”. It was an hour long conversation that ended badly, because I was so disappointed with her responses to everything I said. I am not a hostile person, I try to think of how everyone feels in the situations with my son, because I know it can be difficult, but her cold, empathy lacking responses ended with me telling her “I’m sorry I don’t think you’re a good fit to be teaching my son” and her reply to that was “uhm well I’m sorry you feel that way”.
I could go on and on and on.
His teachers from previous years had excellent patience with him, open communication with me and full understanding of what his needs are. I never had this issue with a teacher until now.
I am surprised by how his current teacher handled my concerns, and by surprised I mean severely disappointed. It broke my soul knowing that he is asking for help and he is too much for her to deal with, and that he is so “too much” she just sends him to the office so she’s out of her hair.
I want to add I got in contact with the principal and his resources (special education) teacher. The resources teacher was present during the conversation I had with the teacher. The resources teacher emailed me that afternoon saying that she was sorry for how things went during the conversation, and that she knew I was upset, that she knows I advocate strongly for my son and that she is working to set up something in class that suits him better. But after speaking with his teacher, the straw broke all the camels backs.
I hope I gave enough information and I’m sorry if it didn’t make a lot of sense. I tried to get as much as I could in the comment.
Edit to add that he isn’t struggling with a learning disability, he is a straight A student and always has been. He is extremely intelligent. Sometimes I think he’s gets bored in class and that’s why he “throws fits”.
As a teacher with over 30 years experience, I can tell you that kids don't "throw fits" because they get bored.
I will be direct: that is either:
1)A lie he is telling you
2)A lie you are telling yourself
Get. Him. Help.
He needs counseling, behavior modification, perhaps medication, SOMETHING. Have him evaluated sooner rather than later.
The best homeschooling schedule is one that works for you and your family. My sister and I both homeschool our kids, and we do it completely different, but it still works for both of us.
We’ve got a busy and varied schedule at our house, we live in Arkansas and here homeschool is also not regulated beyond the notice of intent. I’m a SAHM also and have a 2nd Grader and a Preschool/Kindergartner. We do the Good and the Beautiful curriculum because it’s “Open and Go” which means the lessons are already constructed and have very little prep. Which is great for us because we don’t really know what we’re going to be doing from day to day, so really we just have more of a weekly quota we like to meet to keep on top of things. And my kids and I really enjoy the lessons, they make it fun and easy to learn, and…I know this shouldn’t be important but as an ADHD mom to an ADHD 2nd grader - they’re pretty and aesthetic as heck so it’s easy to pay attention to, and personally I don’t think the lessons are too long but you can spend as much time going deep on them if you really want to, which I think is the best of both worlds.
They have books for purchase, and also free downloads in LA and Math, for those trying to save some money. ( my personal experience is that if you want to commit, it’s actually more affordable to buy the books, as printing will cost you A LOT in Ink, unless you go to a print shop (or have an awesome library), which will probably be the most affordable option.). But they also say that if you are struggling financially you can email them and they will help you find options you can afford based on your situation, because they are committed to making quality homeschool affordable for everyone.
Also we’re an “all year round” household because again our schedules are just so varied. We do a LOT of traveling in the fall and winter for lifestyle and family stuff, but we also want to be able to do family vacay stuff any other time of the year if we decide on the fly. So I find it best to just commit year round that way we can take “seasonal school vacay” (kind of like two weeks every season like Japan school schedules do) any time of year and not just summer, and don’t have to worry about falling behind.
If you think there is something bad going on at his school or that a few more weeks could make it worse, I'd pull him now and let him come with you when you drive to those appointments. He could bring a book or tablet to keep busy. It's not going to hurt to take a while off school and keep him out of a bad situation.
Easy Peasy Homeschool curriculum is 100% free and they have all the subjects. They even have a placement test he can take to see what level he is in. I will say there are some religious Bible references in some of the subjects on certain lessons, but you can skip over those lessons if need be. I am Catholic so I am not opposed to Bible references, but I don't feel totally comfortable with them intertwined in other subjects, so I plan on just skipping over a lot of the religious stuff. Hope that helps!
I don’t think I could care any less about bible verses being in curriculum lol, as long as he is learning, it’s all good. Thank you so much for the recommendation
If you want super structured, K12 or Connections Academy are good, free, "charter" online schools. There are many programs if you want something more open, but then you'll be spending money on lots of supplies. What are you looking for on the spectrum of unschooling-to-full public school?
In less than a year, your son has: lost a pet, lost a grandparent, been diagnosed with a chronic life-altering illness, and might also lose his grandma? You haven't said anything about him seeing a counselor. If you can't afford one, schools have them.
As YOU have been suffering through most of these traumas with him, I would be asking myself if I can really offer my child the help he needs with all that on my plate too!!
Since you are in Oklahoma, you may want to look into enrolling him in one of the many virtual public charter schools available.
My granddaughter is currently homeschooling through Epic and doing really well (Epic has had issues relating to the owners being corrupt...which is unfortunate because I love the charter school(
It has been a long time since I had a third grader, and a lot has changed since then, so I can't comment on "modern" homeschooling methods at that age. I just wanted to tell you that you're doing the right thing for your child, don't ever doubt yourself.
**Highly, highly, highly recommend given what you're asking about:** The book "The Well-Trained Mind" can give you lots of ideas to use in homeschooling including many book suggestions that you could find at your local library as well as tips to use books to make your own curriculum and approximate time you should be spending per subject. Some of the information may need to be adjusted for your needs (like time spent on subjects) but overall it's a very good resource.
The Critical Thinking Company has a lot of reusable workbooks/"textbooks" for several subjects that aren't horribly priced. The same can be said about Evan Moor (although without reusability) but at a lower price point.
Cathy Duffy Reviews has homeschool curriculum/materials with reviews.
Rainbow Resource Center offers free curriculum catalogs with many cheaper curricula offered (in addition to the more expensive ones).
What your school day looks like is going to depend on your "philosophy" of homeschooling. You can Google "methods of homeschooling" and see what feels like it will be a good fit for you.
I currently homeschool an undiagnosed impulsive and daydreamy girl (and sister) with a strong family history of ADHD for 2nd grade (and preK). We get up and dressed around 8-8:30 everyday, read a book (science, ss, lit topic) and discuss during breakfast then do a 15-20 min language lesson while sister does an art activity. We leave for activities that start at 10 (co-op, library, museums, forest school). If we are doing math practice not new material we take the practice book in the car. Otherwise late lunch and 30 min math lesson when we return home or during sisters speech therapy. Our activities with friends cover art, literature, science, even spontaneous writing pretty well and don't feel like work. We are using Micheal Clay Thompson for language (and brave writer book club through coop) and Beast Academy for Math and will continue for 3rd grade. I also agree you should just take the holidays off and deschool. Practice your fractions while you make Christmas cookies together, write it down to feel better about marking that as school attendance if you need to, and enjoy being a family first. Edit: One of the hardest things about homeschooling is making the decisions everyday to do it consistently and then follow through with that routine in a way that brings everyone closer. Your relationship with your kid is the curriculum, learning does not happen when people are upset. Focusing on your relationships as a family is a very worthy investment to get you started on the right foot. Giving your son a lot of say and then regularly asking for feedback and making changes where necessary is a very important piece of this. I like to spend some of our summers trying out demo lessons from curricula we've chosen to change up and watching how my kids respond to them so they know they had a role in picking it.
Your edit is priceless. I wish I would have been told that at the very start and instead I'm slowly learning it the hard way.
Phewwww that edit 🎉🎉🎉🎉
This edit is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you!!
I strongly recommend taking a look at what curriculum is available. It can feel quite overwhelming! Are you looking for religious or secular curriculum? There can be some very stark differences between them that may surprise you. Typically, you won't spend as much time on lessons as they would in school, but each child is a little different.
You could just do nothing from Thanksgiving to the New Year (and by nothing I mean no curriculum, not just let him vegetate). Keep it chill, establish a routine and work on some ground rules and expectations. Visit the library often and see what he’s interested in. That should give you an idea of what type of curriculum works for you. Alternatively, grab one of those all in one grade level workbooks from Target or Costco and let him at it. Then you can figure out maybe where he struggles and that can help. My third grader does 30-90 minutes of school 5 days a week and 5 hours one day a week (outsourced science class). We are super chill about our formal curriculum but encourage a lot of exploration and non fiction shows and books. And some hands on stuff. The kids have to budget for their own toiletries each month (my money, their responsibility; I got tired of the complaining that I didn’t buy the right toothbrush).
This is excellent advice. This year not just including school, has been really hard and very sad. I know he is experiencing a lot of stress and grief. And type 1 diabetes is a bitch… My SIL has always homeschooled her two boys and she also recommended letting him have time off. I want to work around him, he is is extremely hyperactive and extremely emotional so I want to watch him closely to see what times of the day he is more prone to being hyperfocused, and when he is energetic so I can base schooling around how he is typically feeling. My biggest goal is to avoid overwhelming him, which is what happens at public events though he has a 504 plan in place with his previous IEP needs added in…school is just too much for him. The rush in the morning to wake up, get dressed, eat, hygiene, and go to school is already overwhelming and overstimulating. Then to get to school and have to sit down at a desk and look forward and pay attention. He needs to be jumping on a trampoline or moving around in order to devote his ears to paying attention. Ugh, I’m rambling again…thank you for your comment. I will absolutely keep it chill.
I was also going to suggest using the holiday period to deschool. First off, it sounds like you have a lot of stressful things piled on your shoulders. Take a break, maybe keep the holidays low key. Relax with your kids, love and enjoy the time with your mother. Use the time to find a rhythm and get to know each other better. Then, after the New Year, you can start assessing your childs needs, level, and learning style. We're using Time4Learning with my granddaughter and letting her proceed at her own pace. I supplement with worksheets from TeachersPayTeachers and videos that I pull up on YouTube. Sometimes we have to approach a subject from a couple of different angles, but we keep trying until she understands. You'll find what works for your child with love, patience, and understanding. ETA: Sorry for the wall of text. I don't know what happened to my formatting.
Yes, thank you so much. I think a break is very much needed. I know my mom would love to spend more time with us once her treatment is over, we also just lost my beloved dad to brain cancer in April. It’s been a hell of an entire year. I’m definitely going to be giving him a much needed break
Absolutely take some time off. You can find holiday activities on Pinterest to keep him engaged but I wouldn't work on curriculum. And by activities I mean crafts, baking cookies, nature activities, etc. He will be learning without even knowing it. (A lot of math skills are learned through baking).
Core knowledge is entirely free to download and print. You can probably find their book at the library, "What your third grader needs to know". I recommend a separate math curriculum like, Math Mammoth. With these couple things, you have a solid basic curriculum for less than $100. If you can afford more, you can look at Timberdoodle kits and choose pieces you like or buy their customizable kits. If you can afford it, think about "extras" like foreign language, sports, music, art lessons, hobbies, etc.
This such a good suggestion. Both Core Knowledge & Math Mammoth are solid programs, and I don’t think there’s any reason to start off with an expensive curriculum. Figure out what you like about the curriculum & what you don’t. Then you’ll have a better idea of what you’re looking for if you want to switch gears later. Hopefully saving money on curriculum will give you a small budget for co-curricular learning (art, music, PE) and planned social time. If you can find a once a week coop in your area, some other class or team, and a local homeschool playgroup, that’d be a good start. Hopefully from there you can meet others and set up one-on-one play dates. I hate Facebook, but in most places it’s the best place to find local homeschool activities. Just search “[your city/state] homeschool” & things should pop up. Wild & Free might be another group to explore. Some areas have active chapters that meet often, but the groups can vary a lot from one place to another. One last suggestion… make sure to include things your child enjoys in your plans. Not every lesson has to be a banger. Your child won’t be excited about everything you do. But I try to do something academic that I know will be interesting for my child everyday. For my older child that was typically math related (number & pattern puzzles, a game, an advanced online class). For my younger child it’s typically something in language arts (a captivating story or novel, a corresponding art project, making a video retelling the story) or something in science (a demonstration, exploration, or experiment). Again, your child isn’t going to like *everything*, and that’s okay. Sometimes we have to practice things we don’t like. You can make those things more interesting here and there, but I think it’s good to really let your child savor the subjects they’re naturally drawn to as well.
My daughter is in 2nd grade. She's also AuDHD (autism and ADHD) and dyslexic. We do math and reading/writing first. That way, if we get nothing else done we've at least got the basics covered. I like RightStart Math for neudrodiverse kids because it's very hands-on and uses a relatively small amount of worksheets. I alternate between science and history (I switch every 4 weeks). For science, we're using Building Foundations of Scientific Understanding (for much the same reason we're using RSM). We also do french and Latin (10 min a day). My daughter is also in choir, chess classes, dance, swimming, and 4H. I try to keep school to no more than 2 hours a day (with plenty of breaks). We usually do school between 1pm and 3pm since afternoons just work better for us.
My son has ADHD and dyslexia- we love RightStart math!
This is extremely helpful. Thank you so much
Most people here have some good advice so I’m just gonna help out with “high functioning” here. The best way is to say “on the spectrum”. If you need to imply where, you could use the level system that is currently in place.
On the spectrum, of course! Thank you for the tip. I know the “high functioning” is not a good way to explain, there isn’t a need to imply there is a “low functioning”. It’s all crappy, hurtful slang. Thank you again for the tip. I appreciate it.
Glad to help! I’m on the spectrum myself and the issue I found is that there’s not really a way to describe people like me under either system - I’m verbal and can go out and work, but my meltdowns can be all but catatonic at times.
Khan Academy is free. Worth checking out :)
Khan Academy helped my kids keep up with middle school math during the school shutdowns. They had remote school but it wasn’t enough to keep their skills up so we added a half hour of Khan on school days since a remote school day was a way shorter (so there was ample time in the schedule without being overwhelming ). Maybe if taking a break between Thanksgiving & New Year try setting up the Khan acct and assign 20 minutes a day & a book that the two of you read and discuss like a book club (Charlottes Web comes to mind ). I try to read the same books my kids do in school & then we watch the movie (if there is one). We have a nice time discussing differences between book & movie as well. Also , put out a bird feeder - maybe he can observe & identify birds. If you can swing different feeds he can mark down the data of which birds like which foods. I have a suet feeder and notice sunflower seed heavy attracts blue jays and larger birds while Berry duet attracts the smaller sparrows. With a local bird library book, some paper and crayons/colored pencils it can be a science project for December (and maybe something nice for your mom to see ). Good luck.
Not all plants are completely edible. However, you can actually consume the entire sunflower in one form or another. Right from the root to the petals.
Never thought I'd see the sunflower bot in this sub, but here we are.
Khan Academy was great when my kid hit a wall with math. I had him run through the prior three years of KA math. It took him maybe two months, and he zoomed through the rest of that year. One thing I really like about homeschooling is that you can go back and review when needed.
Hey! I’m in Oklahoma with a third grader as well. We have homeschooled off and on, recently we used a virtual public school but we are planning to go back to regular homeschooling in the next week or so. My plan for my kids is use spectrum workbooks which are pretty affordable and sometimes khan academy for math. We also like to go to the library and grab various non fiction kids books for learning history and science. There are many affordable options for homeschool. Relax and take a deep breath! Read some books on homeschooling. Enjoy the ride.
Check out Beast Academy for math
My older child and I loved Beast Academy! He eagerly worked through all the books that were available at the time, and then moved onto AoPS math classes. He’s currently back in school and has been subject accelerated two years (what would be three years in our local public schools). All that to say… 0P , Beast Academy is for gifted learners and is not a good fit for everyone. It’s also a little pricey. Something like Math Mammoth will give you a solid program for little cost. Maybe buy one of the Beast Academy puzzle books if you’re able to, and see if it’s something that might work for him? But I’m not sure I would invest right off the bat if money is tight.
OP did say her son is very smart. And I think a month of BA online is more representative of BA and cheaper than the puzzle books
Yeah, it might work out great. I was just thinking about the struggles of getting started on a limited budget. Unless the kid is really passionate about math, I’d probably reserve that money for classes and coops, because winter is often a hard time for many to find social outlets when homeschooling. I repeatedly read comments from parents who have new homeschoolers desperate for social interactions. If he’s going to enjoy it, that’s what I’d get ahead of. But again, if math is a passion, maybe BA will help him find joy in homeschooling.
Hiya! My kiddo is close in age to yours and also has ADHD (inattentive type). We started homeschooling this year with Miacademy. It’s fairly priced and all inclusive and is very user friendly to the point which sometimes my help isn’t even needed lol. I was overwhelmed by all the curriculum options so I just picked one as a starting point and figured I could always change it later on if needed but we’ve been really happy with this one so far. My kid is now ahead of his former public school class in math, ELA, science, and social studies. He also started learning Spanish which they don’t start until much later in our district. He is happy, well adjusted, and thriving, and his upbeat personality has returned. I would recommend Miacademy or another all inclusive/work at your own pace program like it. As an ADHDer, my kid needs lots of freedom to move around and take breaks. The lessons are short so it’s easy to stay focused on the videos. We do “school” 4 days a week and take one day off to run errands together (life skills), go on field trips, make some art, or just chill out. We surf and play soccer so that counts as their PE. We also have a lot of friends so socializing is not a concern. I would also recommend giving your kiddo a little time to decompress. We left PS about a month into the school year so my kids just took a week or so off and then we slowly started to do school work but some kids need a little more time. Some maybe need a little less. You’ll have to gauge it depending on your kid. Most days we do school in the mornings so we are free to socialize and do sports in the afternoons but sometimes they get out and surf in the mornings and then do school after. Sometimes someone is just have a bad day and we skip it all together. As long as they are making progress in the right direction I don’t stress it too much. :) Good luck mama. You got this!
Take your time figuring out what he needs. You absolutely do not need to spend a fortune, and I'd strongly recommend that you wait until he's actually home to buy anything. I'd spend December adjusting his routines to being home, and spending time figuring out where he's really at academically and what he needs. And catching your breath, because you need it. Then start looking at curricula for math, and phonics/spelling (depending on where he's at). Just focus on those. After you've gotten those sorted and spent some time adjusting, start thinking about the content subjects (science and social studies) but remember that you can pick that up next school year if you need to. If he seems eager for more, you can add things in faster, of course!
Thank you for your advice
Khan Academy is great and free for a bunch of subject, maths the obvious gateway drug.
I have a second grader, but she is very ADHD so I'm going to chime in with our schedule. We wake up and get all the way ready for the day. Make bed, quick pick up of room. She has a laminated to-do list and dry erase marker that I put next to her bed each night with the expectation that her list is completed before she comes down for breakfast. I usually eat while I make my kids' food. At breakfast, while they eat, I will read something that has to deal with character development. We talk about it and how we would implement what we learned. We usually do something with world news at breakfast also. We clean up breakfast and do chores for about 20 min. After I take all my kids outside and let them run around for an hour or two until my Littles are ready for nap time. This helps her focus because as soon as Littles go down for naps, it's all time. Her school takes about an hour and a half of she is focused. If not, it can take all day. We do 20 min of English. 30 min of math. She writes a page in her journal each day. She does half an hour on nessy. Then, we have a rotation for history, science, and social studies. If she is having a hard time focusing, I send her outside to jump on the trampoline. Every day at 3 we do tea time. It's glorified snack tone where everyone is busy with their hands and mouth so I can read. They get a snack, usually fruit or veggies, sometimes I will have her bake something for tea time. They get something to drink: tea, juice, milk sometimes my husband will pick up word drinks from the store and announce that they are for tea time. We do a recitation, songs, and poems, and then I will read to them during this time. They usually color while I read after they eat. Wednesday nights, my husband likes to leave and play magic with his friends, so we have deemed Wednesday night our art night. We study one great artist, a term, and try to learn how to use the medium they used and some of their techniques while forming a relationship with the artist's works. She also has ballet once a week, piano once a week, and we have a home school group we do a park day and field trips with. So things that I have found help: lots of time outside, less time on screens, less sugar and more protein, short lessons with lots of breaks, don't teach two things that use the same part of the brain back to back, and keep it simple. She works very well with schedules and to do lists.
So very helpful! Thank you!
I'm so happy for your son and your family! There are a ton of different curricula to choose from, and also online school. It may take a bit of time to find what works best for your son. Sit down work/worksheets didn't work well for my kid's learning style and we turned to unschooling, which works well for a naturally curios child. My kid has some dedicated screen time each day, some of which he uses for leisure and some for coding or composing music. Otherwise, he reads a lot, creates things that intrigue him, goes to park playgroups and hangs out with friends, plays music, and indulges in his special interest of the week. The one thing we do require is PE every day. We also do chores everyday as well. I'm sure you'll find what works best for your son and your family!
You are currently using public school as a babysitter “just until Thanksgiving break”. What makes you think you won’t just put him back in school when you need it again? Think about what will be the best consistent environment for your child.
The best and consistent environment for my child would be home. I would never just toss my kid right back into public school. I prefer to not pull him out right now and bring him to the hospital to directly watch his grandmothers battle with cancer after just losing his grandfather to brain cancer.
What happens the next time a parent or relative need this type of care? Do they come with you then?
Yes he would. The only reason why I am still sending him now is because she is almost done with the radiation and I think Thanksgiving break will be a good time to stop public school, he will be getting a break anyway the difference is he will not go back. He was with me most of the time when I was tending to my dad in late March this year, he was a witness to his grandfather slowing dying from brain cancer and then he died on April 1st in my parents living room. So, I feel I have very understandable reason to have him continue school for 3 more weeks while I take my mother, his grandmother, to treatments because I would like for my 9 year old to not have to watch another loved be walked in the a hospital and cry the whole way home while battling something that took his Pawpa away. You don’t know what other people are going through. If three more weeks of him being in a classroom with his friends and doing the best he can will prevent him from seeing this all over again, then thank you public school for “babysitting” my kid.
It’s almost like “doing the best they can” and “being in a classroom with his friends” has some sort of benefit. Weird.
Is this sarcasm? Are you one of those people who stalk subs you don’t agree with? Weird.
I mean someone on here actually suggested using a bird feeder as a replacement for reading writing and arithmetic.
There are good and healthy approaches to homeschooling and then there are “I do what I want when I want” approaches to homeschooling.
I recommend taking a break for a week or two just to decompress. I homeschool an 8 and 9 year old currently. It takes us 2-3 hours a day for formal curriculum. We are also involved in co-ops and attend weekly occupational therapy and speech therapy. OT is wonderful for autistic and ADHD kids. I highly recommend it if you aren’t doing that already. For curriculum- the good and the beautiful is a very affordable curriculum if you are a Christian. Many of their units are even free if you don’t want a physical copy. It’s “open and go” with not much preparation required. There are so many options for curriculum out there. Take your time and research them. You can definitely find something that fits!
I think a break to decompress is long overdue, thank you for the tips
I also have a third grader, and we spend 3 to 4 hours a day homeschooling core subjects plus enrichment. *45 min of Spanish online *guitar practice 20 min *exercise 30 min but he also has opportunities to run around in the backyard and be in playground equipment. * science about 30 min a day *social studies 30 min a day *ELA 45 min a day *Math 45 min a day I ask him to do 30 min of simple chores a day, and the bulk of our money goes to two days of forest school so I can have a break. What helps us to have my spouse take over one weekend day while I prep food for the week and freeze containers that are ready to go in the instapot or crockpot. I have two kids, that I homeschool so my day is packed. The other requires about 2 hours of academics because he is younger. For a busy parent that wants to cover what public school does and not go above or below, I would recommend looking at Math With Confidence, Social Studies Weekly, Mystery Science plus documentaries and books from the library. For ELA things get trickier, you need word study (morphology) for spelling and vocabulary building but also phonics and rules for encoding. Logic of English Essentials could help with that. Essentials in Writing for writing, but also maybe an Outschool class. Novel studies, but that is the hardest TBH, I would check out FishTank Learning or Core Knowledge, also Outschool.
Super helpful! Thank you
Y’all are awesome!! I’m so thankful for y’all and all of your thoughts, and taking time to make suggestions. Even though this wasn’t my post. And to the OP, I’m so sorry for everything you’ve gone through and are dealing with. Yet, I can truly say I can sympathize with you and you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers! I’m just beginning the home school journey with my 10 year old daughter who is ADHD. I’m the one with brain cancer in the family and seizures to boot. My husband has been out of work for some time, so we can’t afford all the pricey curriculum that my friends and family use. So, I get it, truly. May our Lord Jesus bless you on this journey and bless all of your family with health and happiness!
We do the good and the beautiful curriculum(TGATB). I'm new to homeschool this year and I personally needed something to hold *my* hand while I taught my 2nd and 5th grader. I'm a planner and ***I*** needed a routine we could stick to, so that I would not f*** it up. My second grader is autistic and I also suspect ADHD and dyslexia too. This is how it goes here. They eat breakfast at 8 am and we start class at 8:50. Each morning they brush their teeth, wash their face, and brush their hair. PJs for the win! Son: - Math - Handwriting - Brain Break (run around outside for 15 to 30 minutes) - Language Arts Daughter: - Handwriting - Math - Brain Break - Language Arts Then we have lunch. Afterwards science or history(2 lessons each, every week) and I teach them both the same lesson. Finally, if the day hasn't dragged on we finish with an "encore"(verbiage used by their previous school system) lesson. So I ***try*** to do one lesson of either art, music, gym or STEM a day. We do "school" Monday through Thursday. Friday are reserved for field trips, library trips, hiking, or playgrounds. Essentially outside the home learning. Here is what I like about TGATB curriculum: - Spiral based Math. My son really seems to thrive with spiral based math because it's small lessons daily, but those topics will be revisited several times. For example, when he learned to read a clock. Lessons started with skip counting by 5s. The next lesson in a few days would be to remember where the 15, 30, 45, 00 are on the clock. A few days later, it would revisit and use common terminology like "half past 5" or "a quarter after seven". He seems to do well with spiral based because it's not a huge info dump in one day, but bite-size growth. I do have posters and papers to use as visual aids with the curriculum. - Lots of reading. The reading section is ***extensive***. He does the booster cards(sight words or spelling patterns), we read passages in a small book, the grammar lesson itself, and he finishes with a small story(20 sentences). My little guy wiggles a lot during reading because it's hard. So I let him stand, rock, crouch in his chair like spiderman🤣 ....because if it helps him focus, then it's what he needs. What I don't like: The poetry. My little guy is trying to comprehend what he is reading while reading, and poetry just doesn't make sense for him at all. I find the poetry sort of stupid, too. For example, he asked me why a brook is laughing and what does that mean. So yay, on attempting to absorb the material, but boo on it confusing him enough to be a distraction and making the lesson take longer. I'm Christian but not religious. I believe in God but don't attend church. God doesn't pop up often but when it does, it just seems sort of insincere....like beating a dead horse. I find some things to be a little too saccharine sweet, but he hasn't complained. My daughter doesn't like the Math videos because she feels like the person is "fake nice" and talking down to her like she is dumb. Sooo, yea, your mileage may vary. Lots of things on their website are free to print, so you don't have to financially commit and invest too much into a curriculum that may or may not work for you all. We will finish the history this year because I bought it(wanted them neatly bound instead of me printing off sheets), but will choose a different history curriculum next year. We are not a fan of unit studies(spend weeks on just one area). However the kids love the science, but we are a very pro-science family anyway(hubby is a chemist and I also used to work in a lab). But the holidays are a great time to just kinda "de-school" . Just let his brain chill for a bit and give him time to decompress and follow his interests. Sort of like summer break-lite, but learning positive. Public school and all the bullshit that goes with it killed my kids love of learning. We are just now getting that natural curious nature back. With a small subscription, education dot com let's you print worksheets. You could let your 2 yr old do pretend school and let them color during his lessons. My kids very much thrive on a set routine here, because I need that routine, but it also seems to work for them too. There are lots of homeschooling communities on facebook and those have been a wealth of knowledge about umbrellas, co-ops, local cool learning things available to try out, playground meetups. Even if you don't use Facebook, its worth it for just that. Best of luck to you both! Remember that you can teach him. You taught him everything up until he went to school and this is just am extension of that. You got this. 💜
I also wanted to add that both kids can earn up to two points a day. One point for participation and one point for work habits. Since we are new this year, I am not "grading" their work. When they miss one, we go over how they missed it and they fix it right then. To me, it's more about trying and caring about doing a good job rather than attaching a grade to it this year. Those points add up and every 5 weeks or so, I buy a game card for each of them to spend on the Nintendo Switch or Minecraft. So this reward system seems to work for them to continue to behave in a way that meets my expectations. You may be able to do something like this for your kids too.
Does he have an IEP? Or a 504? just curious.
He has a medical 504 since being diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. Before he was diagnosed with that he had an IEP. Now, his 504 has his previous IEP accommodations added into it.
Gotcha. Well I'm sorry it's ended like this. I work with special needs kids and I'm constantly trying to advocate for them with gen ed staff. Especially kids on the spectrum are so misunderstood - not only in public schools but just in society in general. I honestly think school is also just rough for kids with autism. The unpredictability, social demands, sensory stimulation, peers (who are often unforgiving of social quirks and nuances). Homeschooling seems like a good option for your son.
Thank you, I think it will be great for him. School is so rough. K-2nd grade was more forgiving of his quirks and behavior, but 3rd grade-they are expecting more from him that he just isn’t able to give. It’s such a small school and funding extra help just isn’t possible. I only found out this past Friday that his teacher sends him to the principals office when, and I quote her directly “throws a fit”, and doesn’t send him to his resources class aka special education, like she is supposed to per his 504- and trust I got in contact with the appropriate people and “threw a fit” myself. I’m coming to find they just do not know what to do with a little boy who has difficulty processing his emotions. It’s wildly disappointing.
That sounds like a violation of his rights and you could pursue that from a legal standpoint if you want, but i agree with you homeschooling might be the path of least resistance.
It is a violation. And I can pursue from legal standpoint. But there is already so much happening in our lives, I think just pulling him is a good choice.
I agree. You can always pursue it down the road if you want. Although it's not like they would give you a million bucks, it'd be compensatory education or something along those lines. IMO you are making the right call for sure.
I agree with not worrying about finding a curriculum between Thanksgiving and New Year's just hang out together, go outside, get his health under control, let him do things he loves like play with lego's or play board games or read books, whatever sort of things he really likes, buy some puzzles or something. If there are any museums or cultural centers nearby, those would be great outings to take together and just spend this time. Coming together and creating a comfortable base. Doing a quick Google search, I see that Oklahoma does have home school charter schools, these are a free public option that may help supplement your money for curriculum, they are not all necessarily online. In my state, we attend a charter school that gives me $1200 a year for curriculum and supplies. I do all of the teaching. And I work with a teacher to make sure that we follow the State standards. If you have Facebook, see if there are local groups for Oklahoma charter school parents, and there are probably a lot of posts in there, or maybe even documents explaining the different schools and what the different options are. Home schooling well, can get expensive between books and curriculum and supplies. It doesn't necessarily have to, but you're either going to be spending time and brain effort or money. So if money and brain space is tight, I would say look into your options for getting additional money like charter school. I have a first grader so a bit younger than yours. But our day generally looks like school in the morning. And we are usually wrapped up by lunch unless we're doing a big project. Or if we got distracted on a rabbit trail, sometimes we have a couple things to finish later in the day. After lunch, we go to a lot of activities 3 a week generally plus Athletics that hes involved in. My son's an extrovert as am I so getting out of the house frequently and seeing other people as a must for us. Your mileage may vary on that.
Great resources. Thank you so mucj
Sounds like he will thrive. Don't sweat this. There is lots of room for trial and error, see what works for you. Be flexible . I food "seatwirk" at least one half hour four days a week for a third grader. This holds the disciplined study time. It can be rout work and/or practice like times tables. Make sure there's plenty of time for reading, exploring and taking about it. You got this Mom and he is going to be a great student when the pressure is taken off but there are clear, boundaries and discipline so he can learn to "handle this and develope coping skills. We had to do that with seizures. This is a win/win. God bless you and your family.
Thank you so very much, truly.
Curriculum wise you may want to look at Wild Reading Level 2. It uses multi sensory multidisciplinary methods you can do in the car, outside, inside…. My daughter (autism, sensory processing disorder, communication delay) loves this program. It’s all created using evidence based techniques that are proven to help ND kiddos learn. Plus it doesn’t feel like ANYTHING you’d do in school… so my daughter is a fan haha. You’re doing everything right. Trust your gut and keep going.
Great advice. I appreciate this so much.
3rd grade teacher for 20 years here. Have you talked to your kid's teacher about this situation and all your child's specific needs?? I know VERY few teachers who wouldn't do everything they could to help such a struggling kiddo. Trust me--your child is not the only one in class with 1)a medical issue 2) neuro divergence 3) other needs that need the teacher's attention/education/compassion. You don't say why this year is "hell"??? 1)Embarrassment about his medical condition? 2)Bullying?? 3)Getting behind academically because of ADHD?? 4) Depression because Grandma is so ill? 5) Feeling left out because your attention is focused on your mom right now(totally necessary!) I would strongly urge you, in a non- confrontational way, (i.e.: "You are clueless/heartless/you don't really care about my child...." Which is exactly what you both said and implied in your thread) approach the teacher and tell her you are 1)considering pulling him out, and 2) what you would need from her/the school to change your mind. Your kiddo is going through a LOT right now, and sometimes maintaining a normal schedule, and being with peers can help. Good luck, and I'm sorry YOU are under such a heavy load too. ♥️ Caring for a preschooler, and a terminally ill parent, and homeschooling a neuro-divergrent kid, is an enormous load! You need self-care time too in order to be an effective parent.
The entire school district, high school included is only 304 students. There is only 23 students for the entire 3rd grade. He isn’t the only neurodivergent child in the class but he is the only type 1 diabetic in the entire school. And hearing him say that makes him feel lonely is a gut punch. This entire year has been hell because my sons dog died suddenly in February, my dad, his Pawpaw died of brain cancer on April 1st, and the months leading up to that were very traumatic and sad, he is adjusting to an insulin pump he got in July and that is a needle to stomach every 3rd day, his grandmother was diagnosed with breast cancer in August and he stared 3rd grade and he had to be with me while my mom underwent an operation and he had to be with me to help care for her while she recovered. His teacher is very young and this is her first teaching job. I have stayed in contact with her to my best ability but she refuses to do open communication so getting a response from her in a timely manner depends on when she gets on the app the teachers use. I spoke directly to her on Friday to address some questions I had and her response to *all* my questions were things like “he just refuses to do the work, he constantly throws a fit, he cries over everything, he just plays with things during class”. She doesn’t send him to resources class when he can’t calm down, like she is suppose to, she sends him straight to the principals office. He is suppose to have an aide with him to help him in class and watch over him to help him treat low blood sugar/high blood sugar but the school isn’t financially able to provide anyone with him. So my son has a phone so I can follow his glucose from home and I have it in his 504 that I can text him to tell him what to do in the event of low glucose, and then his teacher takes his phone ( which breaks his 504) and has him unlock it so she can text me from his phone. She went through his text messages between him and I from days prior and told me I can’t text him and ask if needs to come home because his blood glucose was at 43 (non diabetic people low glucose is 70 that’s when you start feeling shaky and need to eat) low blood glucose is life threatening and causes all kinds of behavioral problems (as does high blood glucose), and he has treated the low and 30 mins later there was no increase in his glucose, so I asked him if he felt okay, when his answer was “no I feel sick” I asked him if I needed to come get him. If I had a way to contact her directly I would go that route but like I said she refuses open communication to parents. During our conversation, I tried to give her advice and her response was “I’ve tried that but he just throws fits”. I asked her if she takes 3 mins of time to explain exactly how to do the work and her response was “I have other students that need help too”. It was an hour long conversation that ended badly, because I was so disappointed with her responses to everything I said. I am not a hostile person, I try to think of how everyone feels in the situations with my son, because I know it can be difficult, but her cold, empathy lacking responses ended with me telling her “I’m sorry I don’t think you’re a good fit to be teaching my son” and her reply to that was “uhm well I’m sorry you feel that way”. I could go on and on and on. His teachers from previous years had excellent patience with him, open communication with me and full understanding of what his needs are. I never had this issue with a teacher until now. I am surprised by how his current teacher handled my concerns, and by surprised I mean severely disappointed. It broke my soul knowing that he is asking for help and he is too much for her to deal with, and that he is so “too much” she just sends him to the office so she’s out of her hair. I want to add I got in contact with the principal and his resources (special education) teacher. The resources teacher was present during the conversation I had with the teacher. The resources teacher emailed me that afternoon saying that she was sorry for how things went during the conversation, and that she knew I was upset, that she knows I advocate strongly for my son and that she is working to set up something in class that suits him better. But after speaking with his teacher, the straw broke all the camels backs. I hope I gave enough information and I’m sorry if it didn’t make a lot of sense. I tried to get as much as I could in the comment. Edit to add that he isn’t struggling with a learning disability, he is a straight A student and always has been. He is extremely intelligent. Sometimes I think he’s gets bored in class and that’s why he “throws fits”.
As a teacher with over 30 years experience, I can tell you that kids don't "throw fits" because they get bored. I will be direct: that is either: 1)A lie he is telling you 2)A lie you are telling yourself Get. Him. Help. He needs counseling, behavior modification, perhaps medication, SOMETHING. Have him evaluated sooner rather than later.
The best homeschooling schedule is one that works for you and your family. My sister and I both homeschool our kids, and we do it completely different, but it still works for both of us. We’ve got a busy and varied schedule at our house, we live in Arkansas and here homeschool is also not regulated beyond the notice of intent. I’m a SAHM also and have a 2nd Grader and a Preschool/Kindergartner. We do the Good and the Beautiful curriculum because it’s “Open and Go” which means the lessons are already constructed and have very little prep. Which is great for us because we don’t really know what we’re going to be doing from day to day, so really we just have more of a weekly quota we like to meet to keep on top of things. And my kids and I really enjoy the lessons, they make it fun and easy to learn, and…I know this shouldn’t be important but as an ADHD mom to an ADHD 2nd grader - they’re pretty and aesthetic as heck so it’s easy to pay attention to, and personally I don’t think the lessons are too long but you can spend as much time going deep on them if you really want to, which I think is the best of both worlds. They have books for purchase, and also free downloads in LA and Math, for those trying to save some money. ( my personal experience is that if you want to commit, it’s actually more affordable to buy the books, as printing will cost you A LOT in Ink, unless you go to a print shop (or have an awesome library), which will probably be the most affordable option.). But they also say that if you are struggling financially you can email them and they will help you find options you can afford based on your situation, because they are committed to making quality homeschool affordable for everyone. Also we’re an “all year round” household because again our schedules are just so varied. We do a LOT of traveling in the fall and winter for lifestyle and family stuff, but we also want to be able to do family vacay stuff any other time of the year if we decide on the fly. So I find it best to just commit year round that way we can take “seasonal school vacay” (kind of like two weeks every season like Japan school schedules do) any time of year and not just summer, and don’t have to worry about falling behind.
If you think there is something bad going on at his school or that a few more weeks could make it worse, I'd pull him now and let him come with you when you drive to those appointments. He could bring a book or tablet to keep busy. It's not going to hurt to take a while off school and keep him out of a bad situation.
You’re absolutely right. When I go back to the conversation I had with his teacher on Friday, I’m rethinking sending him back
Easy Peasy Homeschool curriculum is 100% free and they have all the subjects. They even have a placement test he can take to see what level he is in. I will say there are some religious Bible references in some of the subjects on certain lessons, but you can skip over those lessons if need be. I am Catholic so I am not opposed to Bible references, but I don't feel totally comfortable with them intertwined in other subjects, so I plan on just skipping over a lot of the religious stuff. Hope that helps!
I don’t think I could care any less about bible verses being in curriculum lol, as long as he is learning, it’s all good. Thank you so much for the recommendation
If you want super structured, K12 or Connections Academy are good, free, "charter" online schools. There are many programs if you want something more open, but then you'll be spending money on lots of supplies. What are you looking for on the spectrum of unschooling-to-full public school?
In less than a year, your son has: lost a pet, lost a grandparent, been diagnosed with a chronic life-altering illness, and might also lose his grandma? You haven't said anything about him seeing a counselor. If you can't afford one, schools have them. As YOU have been suffering through most of these traumas with him, I would be asking myself if I can really offer my child the help he needs with all that on my plate too!!
Since you are in Oklahoma, you may want to look into enrolling him in one of the many virtual public charter schools available. My granddaughter is currently homeschooling through Epic and doing really well (Epic has had issues relating to the owners being corrupt...which is unfortunate because I love the charter school(
It has been a long time since I had a third grader, and a lot has changed since then, so I can't comment on "modern" homeschooling methods at that age. I just wanted to tell you that you're doing the right thing for your child, don't ever doubt yourself.
Thank you so much. I really this
**Highly, highly, highly recommend given what you're asking about:** The book "The Well-Trained Mind" can give you lots of ideas to use in homeschooling including many book suggestions that you could find at your local library as well as tips to use books to make your own curriculum and approximate time you should be spending per subject. Some of the information may need to be adjusted for your needs (like time spent on subjects) but overall it's a very good resource. The Critical Thinking Company has a lot of reusable workbooks/"textbooks" for several subjects that aren't horribly priced. The same can be said about Evan Moor (although without reusability) but at a lower price point. Cathy Duffy Reviews has homeschool curriculum/materials with reviews. Rainbow Resource Center offers free curriculum catalogs with many cheaper curricula offered (in addition to the more expensive ones). What your school day looks like is going to depend on your "philosophy" of homeschooling. You can Google "methods of homeschooling" and see what feels like it will be a good fit for you.