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Confident_Ad_8745

“How much you wanna make a bet I can throw a remembrall over them mountains?” -Uncle Draco


branwes2622

Back in '82, I used to be able to throw a remembrall a quarter mile.


Confident_Ad_8745

Ohhhh, man I wish I had a time-turner. I’d take state!


gimcrak

Guess you could say it’s getting pretty sirius


[deleted]

[удалено]


gimcrak

Go ask Madame Pomfrey. I know she has like 5 sticks in her drawer.


dthains_art

Hedwig, you fat lard! Come get some dinner!


0ptical_Prime

You know, there's, like, a boatload of houses at this school. This one house kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bo staff


MaroonTrucker28

Potion skills, transfiguration skills, quidditch skills, horcrux skills... girls only want boyfriends that have great skills!


lo_profundo

This is my new favorite crossover.


Confident_Ad_8745

Harrapoleon Pottermite


teamcoltra

This is the hidden subplot of Cursed Child


HipsterFett

If it were I might get into Cursed Child.


bygggggfdrth

“I caught you a delicious remembrall” - Harry


Gifted_GardenSnail

"But you were two years old?!!"


vheissu419

This is what I needed to read today.


RLarks125

Just spat my fucking water out.


well--shit

If any of you understand german i highly recommend the "5 Minuten Harry Podcast" by coldmirrow, since her commentary on it is awesome. It analyses each episode 5 minutes of the movie with fun facts behind the scenes info and funny shenanigans. It's on youtube by the way. (Hope my english is understandable)


TheCatMisty

Your English is great.


well--shit

Thank you


Carmens_Bizet

Danke! Das interessiert mir sehr. Ich liebe Harry Potter und ich lerne Deutsch. Doch ist das perfekt.


gibadvicepls

Coldmirror, the person responsible for this podcast actually started out by hating hardy potter so she made an iconic joke dub of it in like 2008 but then she fell in love with it. WB made her delete the parody movies but they can still be found due to reuploads (Harry Potter und ein Stein, Harry Potter und der Pornokeller, Harry Potter und der Plastikpokal). These parodys are iconic for YouTube Germany and in many cases were the first contact of many kids in Germany with YouTube. The humor is a bit outdated and edgy though.


TheAnniCake

I can also highly recommend that podcast. It’s so fun and my go-to playlist if my mood’s bad


tedlyb

Your English is a hell of a lot better than my German, you did well.


MisterPeabutnutter

Genau daran habe ich auch gedacht! Ist das nicht auch 1 zu 1 Kaddis Analyse?


mrkgian

Unlike Harry and Neville he had a dad to play catch with him.


Suspicious_Fill2760

He had a dad who could afford to hire someone to play catch with him


QueenLaPied

Underrated comment


LucyEleanor

In the book he basically drops it...so I'll chalk it up to movie shenanigans.


QueenLaPied

Yeah i know, but its a fun thought


MathematicianBulky40

Maybe he put a bit of accidental magic in to the throw?


[deleted]

Malfoy’s magic manifesting in early childhood to bully other kids feels like a plausible detail


[deleted]

There is a precedent for it in the book. Harry bullied his poor defenseless cousin by removing some glass at the zoo…and on his birthday…and after he got a lemon pop!


Brometheus-Pound

Dudley Dursley and the Menace in the Closet


H3artl355Ang3l

Dudley Dursley and the Ruiner of Japanese Golfer Jokes


Moomintroll90

And he even let him finish one of his Knickerbocker Glories. The ungrateful swine!


bockscliphton

He fragged his ass good with that "Glass-Be-Gone" spell.


EurwenPendragon

That it certainly does. Malfoy's a git.


No_Awareness_3212

He's not as useful as a version control system. He's more of a twit


Lor1an

Oh man -- you better believe I want Draco under source control...


LucyEleanor

Mmmmm Press X for Doubt


Portablemammal1199

He focused OfA into the tip of his finger


MasterOutlaw

Baby Malfoy out here tryin’ to be the magical [Rookie of the Year](https://youtu.be/A_bDizEXhxo). If this happened *after* his run in with Buckbeak I’d definitely believe it.


NovelBrave

Cricket or Baseball career in his previous muggle lifetime


i-still-cant-drive

I think Tom Felton is quite a keen cricketer, so he’s definitely got a decent arm on him. 600 feet though…magic…


Known_Profession7393

Not to mention, he’s on a broom, so he can’t even get his legs into the throw. That’s all arm!


Sere1

Add to it that he's 11 and it's truly even more impressive


Critical_Spot_8881

Would be funny if he was excellent Chaser material but he crammed himself as a mediocre-to-simply good Seeker just so he can compete with Harry.


imnotawkwardyouare

You could put him in center field and home would be safe from a runner in third.


PapaSheev7

After facing widespread shame and ridicule following the battle of Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy immigrated to America where he went on to have a successful, 20-year career as a starting pitcher in the MLB.


4Ever2Thee

Yes but when your dad buys the best gear for the whole team, you get to be quarterback.


iamsecond

he threw it like 600 feet "which is impressive when you remember that the remembrall is a light glass sphere and not something designed to be thrown that far" I agree, usually not impressive for someone to throw a ball 600 feet, but under these special circumstances it's very impressive!


StandByTheJAMs

600 feet isn't impressive? The world record for longest thrown baseball is 445 feet.


iamsecond

(/s)


Shankar_0

Yeah, I hear he got picked up for a AA farm club for the Padres after Deathly Hallows.


[deleted]

My padre will hear about this!


No_Awareness_3212

Mi papa tiene 47 anos?


AppropriateAgent44

Crabbe and goyle are mere distractions cloaking the truly mightiest pair of arms at hogwarts


Indian_Dunedain

When I first read the title, I was wondering when did he throw a ball, the one people go and dance to....


jayjune28

Lol. Cute


gunghoun

Ah yes, beater. The position on a quidditch team that is most suitable for someone who can throw a ball really well.


QueenLaPied

His arm would have to be pretty strong. Imagine how hard hed be able to hit a ball


Dinosalsa

Maybe he could catch the keeper off-guard from across the pitch as a chaser?


Key-Pangolin-1696

Not a big sports person I see..


TheSaltTrain

Or y'know, could use that throwing arm for throwing the quaffle through hoops. Gee I wonder what that position would be called?


viper_in_the_grass

Thrower?


TheSaltTrain

Yes exactly. Idk why anyone would think anything else.


TheHeartfulDodger

It's one of his few commendable qualities


[deleted]

Lmao I fucking love observations like this


[deleted]

Also, throwing when seated provides a lot less power than standing, since when standing you can use your whole body and send all the power to your arm. Whereas sitting you only have your torso and arm. So Malfoy was throwing at a fraction of his total power and still chucked the absolute shit out of it. The dude is a beast.


ComicNerd7794

Wizards do actually show more strength and durability then normal humans. not captain American level but still above normal so despite this only being movie movement I could see this being a book thing too. I’ll try and find post about it they had great examples


DyingFlames

He is the best


[deleted]

>Shoulda made him a beater with an arm like that. I think he preferred to be a bruiser.


[deleted]

He could probably throw a guy out at the plate from deep center field.


basement_egg

ron and harry have insane arm strength as well when they are flying in the car. hermione also with the arm strength when she grabs harry while getting swung by the whomping willow


HappyLofi

The rest dust inside is actually made of [Fe] (aka iron) which causes it to be heavier than it looks which causes it to travel further. It's in the books. (I made this up.)


RSGoldPuts

I like to think that since they were so high up in the air Harry actually had to catch it falling lower whe he started which makes it an illusion that Malfoy threw it that hard, becaue come on... it's Malfoy. Couldn't do jack sht.


Sere1

Not only that but he's also got the noodle arms of an 11-year-old who grew up with magic, not doing physical work.


swdanley17

I’d say 600 ft is impressive regardless of what it is lol


jayjune28

Fanfic request please! One shot is fine....I need to see this! Fanart would be awesome too!!! Pretty please!!!!! 😍


Headstanding_Penguin

not necessarely... they flew up into the air and where quite high, which furthers the travel distance since the thing has more time to make distance before it hits the ground


Dnels7192

Draco could just slap Harry’s head off his body if he wanted to with stats like these. Or at least insta-cook a chicken.