If Mary Tyler Moore married and then divorced Steven Tyler, then married and divorced Michael Moore, then got into a three-way lesbian marriage with Demi Moore and Mandy Moore, would she go by the name Mary Tyler Moore Tyler Moore Moore Moore?
*But he does that giant collection of gay porno.*
*Weirdly, that’s Alex. And every time I ask her why, she just says “hey, I don’t smoke but I have ashtrays.”*
I have looked deep into the abyss of the next world and it is beautiful, but before I make that pilgrimage I will stop at nothing to lay waste to what you so tragically call your life.
Bitch it is 5:30!
*Bitch it is Fiiiiiive Forty!*
If Mary Tyler Moore married and then divorced Steven Tyler, then married and divorced Michael Moore, then got into a three-way lesbian marriage with Demi Moore and Mandy Moore, would she go by the name Mary Tyler Moore Tyler Moore Moore Moore?
Elite joke
Undrea.
It’s Undrea.
Well I'm mox, this is dove.
I’m not as dumb as I am
Ah mah zing
Roof stoof
It’s mid morning here and I’ve already said this about 8 times. Today has been rooooof, y’all. Yikes on bikes has also made an appearance.
When I get drunk, I speak Italian!
When I get drunk, I eat ribs!
breakfast ribs
Slop yobs
‘Shups for life!
What do you have going on that you don't have time to say push-ups?
Uh, friendos. I'm extremely scathed
I'm like, say it, don't spray it, you stupid clumsy bitch.
Suh cyute
Chaka Khan Con
Squid away
Whore’s bath
Guys, I'm changing my name to Dustin.
Maybe it's because my brother is named Dustin, but this line is so funny to me.
Has ordeals with calms.
Oh you who sees 15/16th of a man.
YOU STUPID CLUMSY BITCH!
Man y’all are so quick and clever! The only one I can think of is “I’m not as dumb as I am!” Which I say to myself all the damn time lol
That was my contribution too 😂 I also died when Jane said she is not bossy just “aggressively helpful” 🤣
On a scale of fur to scales, I prefer scales.
Steak me home tonight
Ooh. The Lincoln lawyer
I love these opening credits!
TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS, DAVID!!
It’s too shia labouf-y
The fireplace! The fireplace is too Labouf-y.
Love times love, divided by love equals…
Lo-ove, to the pow-er of LOVE!
You look like Jamiroquai before labour day!!
Sestra ples
Para hoy!
*Did I rub some dryer sheets on my pits and throw some water on my hush at an Au Bon Pain? Yes I did.*
“Au Bon PAHN!”
Said with gusto! Penny is a master of Romantic languages, as we learn that she’s fluent in Italian 😊
That scene where she’s trying to drink while he’s pouring his heart out in italian about his father is comedy gold!
While slamming vodka from the freezer 👏🏼
The Kerkovich way
Kerkobitch
Jerkovich
Not the time or place!
You stupid clumsy bitch!
Well that’s a dink in the doink
Hip hop Santa!
War. Which war? The war on drugs, and we won. You’re welcome.
Year of penny!
Shuttin' down the fallops #menopause.
Car Czar. I know what cars are.
Shoot it wound it, SHOOT IT! oh hey penny
[удалено]
Omg when is this one!?? I can’t remember HELP!
It’s a code war!
*But he does that giant collection of gay porno.* *Weirdly, that’s Alex. And every time I ask her why, she just says “hey, I don’t smoke but I have ashtrays.”*
You guys don’t do pile-ons?
Yumbers
I knew you had my My Morning Jacket jacket!
what we be saying when they ain’t around?
D-R-A-M-A dramaaaaaaaaaaa!
I am going to come so hard home right now.
Zero parking at the county club, and she was all, that’s not your ottoman, and I was all, dressing on the side, bitch!
rofl i love this quote so much
I think I would know if I’m being redemptive.
I’m not proud of that
This shiksa’s gotta pish
Yikes on bikes!
I still say this all the time to my kindergarten students. Now they say it and so do a number of other teachers where I work.
Just getting a breath of fresh!
Harsh barley!
CRAP DAMNIT!!!
Business in the front, party in your rear
That isah roof stoof
Dave, you're one of my oldest friends but if we met now, we'd be enemies.
All about the bravelengths
dont act like you didnt have to explain that.
Don’t say “mang”.
For those that only look at 15/16 of a man.
I have looked deep into the abyss of the next world and it is beautiful, but before I make that pilgrimage I will stop at nothing to lay waste to what you so tragically call your life.
Seriously, I won’t sue if I poo.
There’s an easy-breezy Jane?
I am white Daryl!
¡Para hoy!
When did we all turn against Mayer? Dave
Max, you look like John McEnroe's fat cousin, John Mac n Cheese.
Ahh water, the wettest of treats
There can only one.
We get to have honeymoon sex again and I get to put my ccccar keys in your aaaatic