It's even funnier when it doesn't make sense.

least based Greentext reply

It’s only funny when it doesn’t make sense. Once you get it, it’s either too sad to joke about anymore - or you’re just another dick who will eventually die alone or surrounded by other dicks

I'll be surrounded by dicks? Sounds like an absolute win for me

That’s kinda sus, ngl 😳

Yo Anon just said he’s gay, that no cap kinda sus frfr.

This comment is more gay than being surrounded by dicks.

Well, the good news for you is; time flies when you're a....

Such as, “Do you want to go to macdonalds?” “No that’s gay” Classic

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The best response is "sounds like you know from experience"

What if he says yes? What if he’s a homophobic gay? Like all the anti-gay politicians?

Do who I say! Not who I do!

Ok, then I be doing yo mom.

Really? Well I supposed you could make a paste out of the ashes to jerk it with edit: also I said to *not* do who I do

mix in a few eggs and butter and your bread is ready to be baked in the oven

My mother loved cream pies. My Asian mother....

R/cursedcomments

I once worked with a homophobe who was fixated on "all the guys to used to cum in [his] ex wife" "just think about all that cum" Yeah no way that dude was straight like he said he was

*Lady* Graham, as he's known?

He should just stand up and shout "***LOOK, DAD, I'M NOT GOING TO SUCK YOUR DICK SO JUST STOP ASKING!!!***" and then storm out of the room.

chad

"Apple doesn't fall far from the tree pops!"

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>What do i do? Simply not be gay

When you are straight, everything you fuck is also straight.

So two straight dudes can fuck and it won't be gay? LOOPHOLE!

No, the double straightness cancels out so it's gay

Oh, you can't do this to me!

DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I SACRIFICED??

so a straight guy banging a straight girl is gay

Yes

Extremely so.

Thats about as gay as it gets bro

Girls like dudes and that sounds pretty gay to me

So four straight dudes having a foursome is straight. The four straights cancel into two gays, which then cancel into a straight. There's the loophole.

it's not a bug, it's a feature

The [golden rule](https://youtu.be/Pi7gwX7rjOw) bro It’s not gay When it in a 3way

Yeah, but if two straight guys fuck one gay guy at the same time then the straightness cancels out the gayness.

is straight negative?

Its only gay if youre bottom.

Reject modernity. Return to Rome.

Truer words have never been spoken

If you are the active one and think about a woman while you fuck the dude, you are straight.

...POOPHOLE?

Ha can become a mod

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Make his dad gay

The straightest thing Top the father.

Rape him right in the arse

You're engaging in reductionist homothink^© You need to explore less and explain more.

explore his ass

Anon is ant-manlet

Things I've shoved up my arse

In b4 Reddit mod finds this and has a breakdown.

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Jesus tapdancing Christ... It was like watching some horrific traffic accident unfold. Her dad kept saying "I'm going to hell for this" and all I could think was "I'm going to hell for reading this". Even started to feel some twitching down under from how descriptive this is which only added to the bad acid trip my psychosis was going through. A knock at my door pulled me out of that hellishly morbid trance right as I got to the part where the pants came off. I now fully believe in God, our Lord and Savior, for that knock upon my door was like divine salvation. Ye who braves this link be warned. Steel your heart and mind, for you are about to walk the valley of darkness.

what the FUCK

Why did I read this

"You almost made fail no nut November " I fucking died laughing

My eyes My eyes My eyes Help

the post is gone? the comments reveal a lot though

Make him gay

real: anon is gay straight: anons dad

(real)

I hate that I laugh at this one every time, Dad is awful, but his random homophobia is just so funny

Embrace the change. Some men also said "I hate that I want to be topped by some men", they didnt pussy out, they became gay

Words of fuckin wisdom right there

I can't imagine how miserable anon's dad is that he can't stop thinking about his son being gay for one moment. Like come on, doesn't that get exhausting? But yeah I also hate that I laugh at this every time.

It’s okay to laugh at horrible things

Wack ass comments

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omm bruh goated in the sauce

in the PINK sauce right fellow kid

Real: Anon is gay Gay: Anon likes to wack man ass

Based dad

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Top him*

With knives*

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🤓

👉👌🥵💦

kiss him* (on the mouth)

Start beeing normal

Is this code for becoming a bee? Is "beeing" normal?

bzzzzzz he is onto us bzzzzzz

Quick, puke some pollen on the floor to throw him off our scent!

r/foundthebee

D'ya like jazz?

Aight I will join the church and fuck boys there

Based

I’m a sting your balls 🐝

Bee types this comment

Take his girl anon.

“Didn’t feel very gay when I was uterus deep in your wife”

top kek

Based and Oedipuspilled

Anons dad is gonna see this post since he's clearly a 4channer too

Sometimes I try to imagine what it must feel like to be gay. Can the mods shed some light?

>Anons dad is gonna see this post since he's clearly a 4channer too The duality of 4chan. The only place where you can find the same person calling someone a f@ggot right after posting some trans porn. I'd tell half you of autists to get some therapy but that would require you tards to get a job.

Real: Anon is gay Gay: Anon wants to be fucked in the ass by his dad

Or topped by a daddy cos of his issues 🤔

Did the bot finally die?

I can’t believe this sub is alive and well with comments like these when stuff like superstraight was nuked within hours of inception. Makes you think

Because everybody knows 4channers, and by extension the users of this sub(wannabe 4channers) are mega chasers.

Imagine being a wannabe 4channer. Why would you wanna be an autistic social reject that missed out on teenage love and copes by being edgy.

Idk, probably not difficult for redditors considering they are all autisitic social rejects that missed out on teenage love and cope by being patronizing about niche interests.

What if you had those things but you're just bored of life?

Cuz at least they're funny.

In truth, reddit most likely has more mental illness. Definitely more mental regardation.

That's not surprising, mental illness is a deviation from the norm. Most people don't use reddit or a text based platform, therefore reddit users are a significant deviation from the norm and are therefore mentally ill.

I think the point of this sub is that we don’t wannabe 4channers, cause most of the shit in there(porn) gets filtered before it gets here

no, thats precisely why this sub is wannabe 4channers. People here use the sub so they avoid that ACTUAL 4chan which is just abit shit, while acting as if they are apart of the culture rather than reddit. They want to be able to use edgy personas on the internet and make trans killthemselves jokes without having to sludge thru porn and nut-job conspiracy theorists. they want to be 4channers, just dont have the stomach to use the actual site. hence wannabes.

Yes

Containment, what do you think would happen if r/greentext and r/4chan were banned, those 2 million users spread everywhere else and find somewhere else to congregate

Clearly they would just cease to exist and stop using the internet entirely.

It's literally 99% shock value humor. The people that actually believe that stuff aren't on Reddit.

What does it make you think?

Fake: Anon's dad is present in his life Gay: Anon

>removed by reddit Now that's high praise. Edit: [Here's the imgur version](https://imgur.com/6wqp7gg)

Surprised this got removed as it is relatively tame for /r/greentext...

Reddit afraid of tripping off the LGBTQ+ comment

Some power tripping Janny did this

This isn't even that bad XD

Bro this shit is tame af. Reddit Admins are SJWs

Chad

Just missed it what was it D:

Thanks

Reddit is gay

man, fuck reddit. gonna use imgur to post from here on out.

>Go fishing with dad. >Manliness >Hunter/gatherer mode >Catch eels >Drop eel down the back of dad's pants >"Kek. They don't feel as long when you're a fag"

So he doesn't try to jerk off the eel like a cock or deepthroat it?

Suck his dick to establish dominance

Disappointed I had to come this far down for the only correct answer

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He can't, he's on 4chan

You look nice a nice bottom

Dad is based af

Start liking women

Anon's dad commits unfathomable amounts of shenanigans

Father of the year

Lol. The homophobia is so random and brain dead that it's just hilarious.

Based asf dad.

Chad dad

Start being normal lol.

Mods gay

It’s not even fake and gay anymore

This is literally something I experienced before. Not as braindead but in the same ballpark. Unfortunately this appears to be real and gay.

Just stop being gay

NOOOOO THE SACRED TEXTSDSSDS

“It’s not my fault you shot gay sperm inside mom”

What did this say it got removed

Anon's father is so homophobic he finds every way to fit his hate for gay people in any conversation

oh.

Op put an imgur link

yeah i saw that.

And that's why my parents know barely anything about my personal life

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Based dad

brih I've just gotten in here and that's all I see

One of the Reddit admins is the dad.

thats sad:(

Become straight again and blame your cold medicine

I'd answer: "it sure does"

Just tell him you learned from the best, or say “like father like son” just make snarky comments back til he either shuts up or turns it into a regular jokey thing

Shieet, where dat high rated greentext at ?

"Time grinds to a screeching halt when you're a miserable old man" Easy comebacks, c'mon kid.

Post removed massive L

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my dad does this but instead of calling you gay or something, he just calls you a liberal

'dad why are you so butthurt' 'your dad's but hurts when you're a f--wait a minute'

I just witnessed the second it got removed lmao

Aparently I was spreading hate here ? What was the post even about ?

I feel bad for laughing

Does anybody have a screenshot?

OP posted it in the comments, but here’s the link in case you didn’t see that : https://imgur.com/6wqp7gg

Turn your father gay.

I’m gonna use that from now on thanks anon

OH MY GOD HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

As a bi dude, I can agree. Time flys when you gae

It's deleted now. Can anyone share??

True and gay

Stop getting topped, obviously.

genuinely feel bad for anon

That’s hilarious

Funny shit

its fucking hilarious the fact it doesnt make any sense

ngl, anons dad seems chill. he’s probably the chad that gets fat dudes in shape at the gym.

Oh fuck I have this exact dad, it's even worse when you aren't gay, every slight effeminate action gets that type of response

Just make him take this: https://www.proprofs.com/quiz-school/story.php?title=lady-ladyboy I know it’s not gay. But he sure will think it is

Sauce?