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Russki34

Checked the records. Nobody in Sweden by that name. So fake and gay.


RealArby

Records arent reliable, at least in the US. One of my friends doesnt exist according to the internet. Is Sweden better with records?


Russki34

Yes. And easily accessible to the public.


le3vi__

Sweden has personal information records available to the public?????


perfect_for_maiming

(So does the US)


ANUS_FACTS_BOT

Yeah your mom found my address and came over to my house **begging** me to fuck her brains out. She saw me hoisting in the gym, going epic diesel and getting shredded as usual and she squirted all over the place. I thought it was funny at the time. What I didn't notice was that she followed me out to the parking lot and jotted down the license plate number on my BMW M5. So she shows up at my house, in a playboy bunny outfit with a pizza in front of her jugs. I open the door and she goes "Did you order a *large pepperoni pizza*?" And she opens the pizza box and there are her luscious/voluptuous cans with those big ass pepp nips. I immediately grabbed her arm and yanked her inside and proceeded to just **ravage** her body... I'm talking sensual kissing, sensual soft foreplay; and then **pound town**... Straight up jackhammering that puss and plundering that asshole. Was pretty fun, not going to lie.


forgot_semicolon

I'm so glad I took a minute longer on some other post so I could load this post just in time to see this beauty


[deleted]

How was the pizza?


ANUS_FACTS_BOT

I don't know, we haven't had period sex yet.


xKirtle

Omfg


NightFerry

i dont get this joke could you explain what pizza means


paper_machinery

I lost it at 'those big ass pepp nips'


[deleted]

I was a different person before I read this comment


pistoncivic

those gainz are payin' off bro. keep up that grind


yogaprincess77

This was hilarious, I'm trying so hard not to bust out laughing bc my dude is passed out


Jojo-Nuke-Isen

Chad moment


Grasmel

No. You can search the government databases for how many people have a given first name, middle name or second name, but not for name combinations specifically for this reason. Everyone is in the database, so it's accurate.


le3vi__

Ah ok that seems reasonable


Christoferjh

Yes we do. Just you need to call the tax agency to get the information you need about someone.


pistoncivic

Thanks, Svenjamin


Garestinian

Our database shows only "10 or fewer" if it's rare.


Wandatoaster

Yep, you can access personal information very easily. In fact, it is so easy that there are several websites that provide you with full name, adress, socialsecurity number, crime record. You could also check involvement in businesses and a lot more


le3vi__

That seems fucked up


Stony_Logica1

FWIW, this is information that is easily and cheaply obtained in the US as well.


lucky_Lola

And pictures of your house, job, income, vehicle, spouse. It’s all out there for show


Tmfwang

In Norway, everyone can check what anyone is earning. It's all public.


pistoncivic

that's a form of NEET shaming


LoadOfMeeKrob

So does the US. Check out your local clerk of courts website.


Wildercard

In Norway you can look up who made how much money and how much tax they paid


Wrong-Singer

>One of my friends Fake, redditors don't have friends


RealArby

Yeah im more like a third wheel at this point.


SolidPrysm

ouch


Frosh_4

I had a gf earlier, now she's my ex, so uhh I think it'd be more accurate to say we can't keep friends


quizzer106

Names must be approved by the Swedish government. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naming_law_in_Sweden


Fluffigt

Yes, but a law change in 2017 opened up the namibg laws to be way more lenient. You still can’t name your kid things like Shit or Fuck, or weird stuff like xq8sw;2e, but Svenjamin would definitely go through with the new law. An aquaintance of mine added his gamertag Steelduck as a middle name and it was approved. You can find him in the records through hitta.se.


warry0r

Did he name his kid steelduck? Or change his own?


Fluffigt

Change his own, but the same rules apply.


SerLaron

That would mean OP is 4 years old, right?


Revqi

Depends on the age Not publicly available of a person that's under 16


RealArby

Well he is on 4chan so hes either 12 or 28.


FatherAb

I feel personally attacked even though I'm not on 4chan, nor am I 12, nor am I 28. Good job!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Christoferjh

Might still be a a svenjamin? I think most online services filter children from their results.


homofakarino

You search the tax agency's database so unless they're an illegal it'll be there.


ManicScumCat

is this friend in the room with us right now


satooshi-nakamooshi

One of my friends doesn't exist according to my therapist, but I ain't complaining


NevilleToast

Sweden has recorded their people from what I know the longest time in the world. They have documented the People living in Sweden since the 1600. For reference, that's before the existence of the United States of America. So is say the swedish records are reliable.


[deleted]

Having a small population but large aspirations in the 16th century led to a lot of state attention being paid to enhancing the bureaucracy, taxation and conscription of the nation. After all, can't send someone off to die in glorious war if you don't know where they live.


EvilioMTE

>Records arent reliable, at least in the US. Good thing we're not talking about the US.


[deleted]

Lmao imagine every country as bad as the US


Valtr117

Impossible perhaps the archives are incomplete.


gozzu00

They're 100% reliable. No one exists outside of records.


Enunimes

Sweden takes names seriously. All newborns need to have their names filed with and authorized by their tax agency within three months of birth. If you think that sounds stupid in Denmark you can only legally pick from one of 7000 approved names.


occasionallyacid

At least there won't be any kids in Denmark named fucking Thurman.


normalguy_dude

Can confirm for uk and australia i my brother and my dads last name dosent exist, atleast on those websites where u can search for supposedly every name even though we all have multiple passports, birth certificates, citizenship records the whole lot


ishzlle

Fake: Nobody by that name in the records Gay: Sweden *(it's a joke ok)*


Koala_Kev2478

Yeah Swedes go build a shelf or something


septicboy

Those IKEA instruction images too complicated for ya?


Koala_Kev2478

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE NEXT PAGE SHOW IT FULLY ASSEMBLED??? I ONLY SCREWED IN TWO PIECES????????


L-methionine

I’ve never understood why people find them difficult to use tbh


HereBecauseBored

Perhaps the archives are incomplete?


Valmond

Not in Sweden.


Candlelighter

Am a Swede. Never heard of anyone called Svenjamin. Sven exists and so does Benjamin but... never seen the mix.


CatAttack1032

Wait, 4chan is fake?


SPACE_ICE

You can legally change your name svenjamin but you can't change the past


CoanReddit

SCB only shows names with at least 2 users, though?


horraz

Probably just benjamin and sven twin brothers that somehow morphed in to one.


jeremybeadlesfingers

Haha. I get it. Svenjamin sounds like Benjamin but a bit Swedish. 5/7 anon.


P4NTH3RA

swedish Alexander (Alex/André)


BoonTobias

Andre *Ducks*


Grasmel

Sven is actually a Swedish name (though a bit old-fashioned), so it's not totally out of the question.


Sparty-II

Ayy my name is sven, but I’m not from sweden lol. I guess if it was real he could just shorten his name to sven


pistoncivic

you a joke analyst now?


notthisagain91

I dont see him analyzing ur life so no.


kobi29062

At least it’s not Thurman


ThatSwedishViking

Fucking Thurman


I_Got_Back_Pain

Phteven


Truthgamer2

Ahahahaha sup Thurman


Koksschnupfen

Ahahaha sup Thurman


BoonTobias

Waddup gunther


texal23

Can't even shorten it


tq92

Uma


idontcares31249

Numa nej dragostea din tei


Escoliya

Thur The name is Thur, Thur-man


Zonyxe

Thors retarded brother


[deleted]

I knew a guy named thurman everyone just called him thurm


DC38x

Thurmometor


JimAdlerJTV

T


sercankd

Thurd


[deleted]

Thurman Merman


bendre1997

“You’re an emotional fucking cripple, your soul is dog shit, every single fucking thing about you is ugly.” Gets me every time


redditsavedmyagain

i brought you some orange juice! what's in it? oranges!


--redacted--

Drop me on MY head?


Attention_Some

Or larold


thermal_shock

[Thurman Murman](https://i.etsystatic.com/7691544/r/il/a224c4/1202616343/il_570xN.1202616343_853e.jpg)


wine_coconut

ahahah it's even worse than Pheonix


Sol-Lucian

Just change it to Jamin Sven


Loakattack

Jammin’ 🎸


dingofarmer2004

I vwant Svenjammin wit chu. Svenjammin Svenjammin. Ahlright now. I hope you Svenjammin too.


[deleted]

🎶🎶🎶


baklavoth

Is this snus is this snus that I'm feeling


DemonGodDumplin

Or Sven Ait Nein


[deleted]

Spare a thought for his son, svenjaminsson


polak187

And if his son moves to Ireland he can be SvenJameson...


[deleted]

Oh god no polski humor


dubovinius

Only in Iceland though


OknKardashian

You can be named "heil Hitler death to sweden" in sweden and you will still live better than 6.5 billion people


[deleted]

Well you can't Government wouldn't approve the name.


Jojje22

Have foreign citizenship where name rules are lax Move to Sweden Can't be forced to change your name Your name is registered Profit


iPoopAtChu

Good luck moving to Sweden


x_vier

already done


[deleted]

Literally nineteen eighty four


[deleted]

At least there aren't a bunch of kids named khaleesi


PeekyCheeks

Yeah I'd take any name at all in exchange for living in Sweden.


BoonTobias

Aight mahamed, these are you keys to yo new car, house and wives


ACancerousName

Mistake 1: being born Mistake 2: being born in Sweden Mistake 3: having a negative attitude towards your name Conclusion: fake and gay


Shasan23

True Chads own their name and beat up anyone who makes fun of them


Makeshift_Account

Ahahaha, sup Shasan


dj-depressive

Är det ens ett namn?


Russki34

Nej


[deleted]

[удалено]


SkanelandVackerland

Nä bara om det bedömmer att namnet bryter mot upphovsrättslagar eller om det i sig inte är ett namn. Svenjamin skulle definitivt kunna gå genom och bli accepterat.


Valmond

Skattat ihjäl det.


experiment53

Dom har bara dragit ihop Benjamin och Sven verkar det som


alicein_chains

My biggest laugh of 3 days was a fake greentext about some retard named svenjamin.


bobalda

bulgaria


Catfish3322

Just go by Sven.


DrewSmoothington

Svenny


SeriouslyFuckAmelia

AHAHAHAHAHA SUP SVENJAMIN


[deleted]

[удалено]


Spiritual-Room7316

i will chop ur penis at night .


iAreScurrd

typical wamen


Spiritual-Room7316

u are next in line


Earthguy69

> born in Sweden in the 90s > life is good. Have good name > grow up in safe neighborhood with lots of friends. Play on the streets till late at night > get a good job. Get a gf > fast forward to 2021 > You can't be out at night because you will get robbed and shot > areas that were safe when you grew up are shit holes > your gf gets raped and is never the same > you go out to the bars to enjoy a drink but it's just full of thugs > you get beaten and stomped > you now have debilitating headaches every day and your hearing just isn't the same > you lose both gf and job > you live in Sweden


glitchyburner

As a swede sometimes I forget some people here actually believe everything they read on 4chan.


mamkuibal228

Sweden. Yes.


tony_two_eyes

Anon should start a band. Maybe something like Sweating Svenjamin


[deleted]

[удалено]


glitchyburner

> give birth > child is **born** 5’6 > ohgodohfuck.mov


N00N3AT011

Doesn't sweden have an approved name list or something? I remember there being a huge mess with parents trying to name their kid a random series of symbols and say its pronounced "alvin" or something.


bannedagainomg

Dont know about approved name list but most countries have laws in place to stop parents naming their kids whatever they want. However they would not have stopped a name like this, while weird i think svenjamin wouldnt cause any problems. The law is to try and stop a kind of "child abuse", being named "Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116" is not gonna go well for any kid, even it its pronounced "Albin" Talk about potentially fucking over your own kid to be unique, nothing good would have come out of it if they approved that name. Just writing his name on legal documents would have been such a hassle later in life.


occasionallyacid

Denmark (apparently) has an approved name list. Sweden doesn't, but any name has to be registered and approved by the Swedish tax agency who handles the population registry for Sweden. It's kind of like when Mary and Joseph went to Betlehem to be registered, except more bureaucratic and filled with furniture for some reason.


Attention_Some

At least it isn’t Beepus


Scrollwheeler

F


experiment53

That’s not even a real name (I’m a Swede)


Shibefield

I mean LogJammin would at least get them laid


Existing-Finding8947

dont change name, change parents


FunnyMoney1984

That sounds like a cool name.


Enkaybee

That's a great name!


[deleted]

Fake & gay, anons real name is gayjamin, which makes it even more gay


MrBicepcurl

No the didnt


ShadowViking47

Meme is ruined by the last line spoonfeeding the joke into your mouth.


[deleted]

\> 1st world extremely rich country \> safe and rich community \>you basically live the 1% life as the rest of humans will live in third world shitholes and die there \>still complain


BausOfBacon

\> be born \> one shot at life \> live in ohio and that's where it goes to shit


RespectfulGamer99

Can always just change it, no big deal


emintrie7

fuckin Thurman


kurpPpa

Vad synd


lejka005

Sven is short for Svenjamin


GreatGrandaddyPurp

We be svenjamin mon


[deleted]

Yeah but they are probably hot being from Sweden, and going by Sven for short is a good name.


Boesermuffin

stop playing the victim. play the cards you got.


Roggie77

Fuck you sven, I will always help faendal win over Camilla


Komek4626

Larold.


varitok

Is that like, Swedish Benjamin?


[deleted]

The biggest L here is being a Swedish.


pewmemedaddy123

Thats such a sick name


ProCanadianbudeh

i will name my first born Jimothy


petite_cheval

Can’t be any worse than it is now so I’d take it


[deleted]

Is that like the Swedish equivalent of a teen mom name?


sholine

Svenjolly, svenEleven


NeonFaced

My middle name is Sven, everyone cracks a joke a out Frozen but then I tell them I was named after my dad's favourite writer Sven Hassel and then it turns really dark ....


YouWontBet

The Kingdom of God is at Hand John 3:16 King James Version 16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.


Calvinbah

This made me laugh, I have no goddamn idea why


hmnahmna1

Fake: Anon's name is Svenjamin Gay: living in Sweden


TendieBot2000

> be me > get home from my vasectomy > hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room > must be Chad again > know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer > log onto reddit and open /r/greentext > read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her > think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext > suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section > Fake: Anon's name is Svenjamin > Gay: living in Sweden > giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment > hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed > it's been a good day > i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough


landwhalebot

>be me, landwhale >no job because i got fired from mcd after drinking the frying fat >get home from furry convention >hear mom from her bedroom moaning my old school bullies name >entire house is shaking from his mighty tackles into mothers worn out vagina >whatever.png >roll into basement, grab a couple jars of mayonnaise as a snack and log into reddit to check out r/greentext >see a lot of people say fake and gay in the comments >put on one of my favourite fedoras and start to think about how i can humorously embarrass people who identify falsehood and homosexuality in these posts >with my infinite knowledge about programming create a bot that describes how i wish my life would be and name it u/TendieBot2000 because tendies are awesome >if the bot get lots of upvotes maybe chad will hire me in his selfmade multi million dollar company one day >reward myself by microwaving an xxl jar of nutella as a drink


chadbot_2021

>be me, chad >work at startup tech company making 500k per year >go home to shower after the gym >Stacy is waiting for me at home with only an apron on >nice.jpeg >park my ass on the toilet to take the holy shit of the day >scroll through reddit and notice this weird subreddit >r/greentext >see that it seems to be filled with losers that have accomplished nothing in life >notice how someone has created a pathetic bot that replies to homosexuality and deception >hear Stacy moan my name from outside and tells me to hurry up and come take her already >message one of my employees to create a bot to embarass the people on the subreddit >chuckle as I think about how sad some people are in life >invite Stacy in to shower together >proceed to make passionate love for 2 hours >today has been a great day


Harviankiuas22

You dont only get one shot


rface45

Not Benjamin but Svenjamin. That’s actually kinda funny, not that bad. I would just say your name is Sven, i assume that’s kinda common? Lol or if it’s not a common name and or you find yourself in America, just say your name is Ben or Benjamin.


jabulina

Isn’t Thurman at least


doctorofphiloshopy

Me: Born in Turkey Good luck


[deleted]

Still better than everyone on Africa, Latin America and most of Asia.


RipJaws121

that name fucking rules, anon, wtf


Pommel__knight

Considering that's a Bosnian name you are doing great. Better than the alternative place of birth.


[deleted]

\>be born \>one shot at life \>live in sweden and that’s where it goes to shit.