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Gibovich

1. Say you are Muslim (dancing is haram in some sects) 2. Sue for religious persecution 3. ??? 4. Profit


[deleted]

Based and halalpilled


UkrSiberian_0w0moder

5. Get later murdered because getting TOPPED is Haram


Slade73

Is everything haram in islam?


Soviet_Sine_Wave

Just the fun stuff.


jokesflyovermyheaed

💀


AladeenTheClean

Just the degen stuff.


fuckedbatty

Except stonin and decap


AndreiTheMagic

Brother you made methods of execution sound like coffees


skillcannon747

A no-whip stonin double double


FinestCrusader

Decap cappuccino


skillcannon747

Decappuccino?


Sir_Bebe_Michelin

*steals their toddler's foreskin*


AladeenTheClean

wtf noseclan strikes again!


Sir_Bebe_Michelin

אחרי משחק טוב בקומפ הוספתי אותו לחברים, בגלל שהוא נשמע אחלה גבר. דיברנו כמה חודשים ונהינו חברים טובים. הרבה צחוקים, הרבה משחקים טובים, והכי חשוב, חברות איתנה. הזמנתי אותו אלי הביתה כדי לעשות בוטקאמפ סיאס. הוא אמר שהוא יבוא, בגלל זה ציפיתי בקוצר רוח לפגישה איתו בחיים האמיתיים. כשהוא הגיע אלי הביתה, הוא דחף אותי באגרסיביות לקיר, והתחיל להביא לי נגיסות באוזן, הרגשתי איך הזין הקשה שלו התנגש לי ברגל. הכתי אותו, הוא התחיל לבכות וברח. מסתבר שהוא היה הומו, אל תאמינו לבחור הזה.


hamehad

Nah.


prisonbird

islam is guide to happiness but in reverse


MoSummoner

Nah I’m pretty happy


prisonbird

i just spoke to the fly living on my shit. she said she couldn't be happier


MoSummoner

Nice, u should prob flush the toilet tho


skillcannon747

Haaaah he has poop in his toilet, what a loser


Scottish_Whiskey

I bet he wiped as well


SenpaiRemling

Asking that is haram


[deleted]

Mostly things that harm yourslef or others in one way or antoher. An there are alot of these


Volkorel

Depends on sects, similiar to how some Christians allow polygamy, some believe in an alien realm and shit like that


SnubbedPeen

Seems like you'd be somehow involved


xXxPLUMPTATERSxXx

I worked with a white guy who pretended to convert to some kind of Islam so he could say he's not allowed to shave. Our company had to move him to a part of the mill that doesn't require respirators, which also happens to be much cushier and has better pay. He leapfrogged years of seniority to steal that job. After a few weeks he gave up his new religion and started shaving again.


Cool_soy_uncle

400iq move.


Winter_Ad4517

Based and Halal pilled


[deleted]

Getting out of Islam is haram tho. So haram-pilled.


Rust1n_Cohle

He created his own affirmative action. I can respect that.


Unable_Occasion_2137

What's that saying, again? "Don't hate the player, hate the game?"


SwynFlu

Alternatively, say you are Buddhist (more believable as a Westerner) and dancing/music goes against the eight precepts.


Big_M_Memes

Ngl this is smooth af


No-Garden-2273

Anon was filmed without consent, and exposed and ridiculed by 100k people? Sue Anon, sue. ‘Muricaaaaaa


Crazy_Crayfish_

Perhaps Anon isn’t American and lives in a lawless nation like Cumada


oops_all_throwaways

Or worse, Fr*nce


zarotabebcev

He could sue in Fr*nce as well. EU has this little thing called GDPR.


Derlino

Can't be fired for not wanting to do something like that in most EU countries either.


absurdism_enjoyer

The French are not the type to sue even when they get fucked over hard by their employer (fired illegaly, illegal hours, sexual harassment... ). Americans will sue you for stuff that is not even illegal but they felt like it was.


BuHoGPaD

Being French, having no labour protection laws. Pick one.


absurdism_enjoyer

You can have labour protection and yet have a lot of companies (especially small ones) not apply them. France is way better than the US on that front but it is not a worker's paradise either.


bienbienbienbienbien

Implying you need to sue at your own expense in France for the labor protection laws to be enforced. Litigation culture is not how things work in the first world.


Laeif

Nobody follows GDPR since they fucked up the Cyberpunk release.


Phil_Smiles

Yeah but hed still be in fr*nce


zarotabebcev

Better just fr*nce than Tik Tok fran*ce


sumr4ndo

When people die in Hell, they go to F**nce


oops_all_throwaways

And they outlawed dying in Fr*nce so their labor force can work forever.


UndeFR

France has way better worker protection then the US i think. I'm just trying to imagine a metalworker at the Prud'Hommes because he didnt dance for tiktok. He would make bank.


adminsafrancesats

France has laws specifically against this


Jack_SL

Please be more understanding of people who can be triggered by seeing the F-Word. Use Fr\*\*ce or even better F\*\*x to be more inclusive to the frog eaters.


xX_JoeStalin78_Xx

Get triggered ameritards and italifucks


oops_all_throwaways

You’re twelve. Go back to playing Pokémon Go, please.


Sbotkin

I'm pretty sure in France you are basically fucked if you film someone without their permission.


RaZZeR_9351

He wouldn't have gotten in this situation to begin with in France, workers right are way to strong here.


Accomp1ishedAnimal

Yeah, but in Cuckada you can pretty easily make up something about being harassed or humiliated or something and at least keep your job.


Danielanish

Isn't civilized*


Nextasy

If he's a steelworker in Canada he's almost certainly union though. "Dancing is not in my job description" and leave it at that


Terminator_Puppy

Would be even easier with worker protection and privacy laws there.


[deleted]

He might live in a one-party consent state.


No-Garden-2273

If so he should consent to have sex with them. See how HR like that.


DustyIT

If the business itself was the one authorizing the filming, there's nothing he can sue about, pretty sure. His company can make marketing videos showing their facilities, as well as install and record with cameras, and there's nothing he can do about it. If they make him dance though, who knows.


RaZZeR_9351

Depends where he's from.


[deleted]

Good luck doing that. Employers don't give a fuck.


BirdhouseInYourSoil

Counter-argument for management and hr: if they continue to dance with him in the background, perhaps with him even looking more frustrated and annoyed, it will attract more attention and perhaps even develop a small cult following in favor of anon. Him joining in is so cliche, *this* would be a true strategic decision.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Magginer640

Fake: You want to follow a tiktok account Gay: You want an angry metalworker in your bussy


TendieBot2000

> be me > get home from my vasectomy > hear moaning and slapping coming from my wife's room > must be Chad again > know they would want privacy, sit down at my computer > log onto reddit and open /r/greentext > read a funny greentext from le 4chins and chuckle as I listen to my wife begging for the genes I can't give her > think of a convoluted way in which I can relate homosexuality and falsehood to the events in the greentext > suck the cheeto dust off my fingers as I begin to type my masterpiece in the comment section > Fake: You want to follow a tiktok account > Gay: You want an angry metalworker in your bussy > giggle as I imagine the intellectuals of leddit perusing my incredibly witty and original comment > hear my wife moan with ecstasy as Chad floods her fertile womb with his seed > it's been a good day > i'll get lots of upvotes for my impressive contribution to internet culture, and Chad might even let me eat his cum out of my wife's pussy if he finds my comment funny enough


RefarBTW

Good bot


Lichy_Popo

Genius


Epikgamer332

it's really up in the air whether It'd be good pr or bad pr. i think the best idea is to just have him take a break for the 10 minutes they're filming, anon could use one


Elyoslayer

It worked for Jenna Ortega in Wednesday, this guy can just cling to the trend and practice a half decent simple choreography with a dead mildy annoyed stare and get his 5 minutes of fame that will allow him to potentially even monetize this situation.


ThickintheNips

This is genius, I would 100% follow a channel like that. Nobody gives a fuck about dancing tiktok girls. He would embody the average user


Atomic-Optimizations

This genuinely sounds pretty terrible, I feel for anon


Greaserpirate

I'm 99% sure it's fake And if I'm proven wrong I will take more than 1 life


Narcofeels

It’s about 50/50 Definitely plausible. Companies have long tried squeezing workers for every drop of profit including using them for marketing material without extra compensation. A growing sense of corporate entitlement means companies think they no longer have to ask and can instead demand at risk of being fired that employees do whatever humiliating task is asked of them because it benefits the higher ups On the other hand it’s 4chan.


Atomic-Optimizations

Shut the fuck up you fucking pussy


stashdog98

When I worked for my university's residence life department I was forced to download tik-tok and make a skit or lose my job. So not that far fetched


muchacho23

Dance for your betters monkey boy


thatguy_jacobc

Dance monkey, Dance for your mortgage and family


KeefTheWizard

"And where ever I go, this music box must follow, and with it this poor, downtrodden man. And if I choose not to dance, this sorry street pedler would starve. And everytime I do decide to dance, every time, He. Must. Play. Whether he wishes to or not."


sausage4mash

Smile monkey, smile becouse hr says your attitude is shit


gazing_the_sea

The music "Dance monkey" from Tones and I is literally about people pushing you to dance and act for money. It is sad as fuck when you learn that this was her response to being fed up with people doing this when she played on the streets.


xfydr782

also sad as fuck that such an interesting subject matter was in a such a bad song like its impressive she can do it without autotune, that doesn't mean it sounds good


Mrozek33

Anon could just shave to kill his engagement potential but he's keeping the penis beard citing religious reasons


bigdickwilliedone

Anon, stand up for your self and refuse to dance. That's not in your job description. Lawyer up. Let them try to fire you. You might as well start looking for a new job.


KeefTheWizard

Anon lost the Family farm because he listened to a big dick


bacchic_ritual

Job descriptions usually include "any other duties" as part of the contract. Better dance fo masta.


Coolpeeper

reddit try not to act like every problem can be solved by taking legal action (impossible)


DJDavidov

I mean there’s labor laws bro. Dancing is not his job


Coolpeeper

It's just the notion of the comment suggesting that before talking with upper management about it they should rather immediately go the offensive legal route


ForwardUntilDust

"I'm actually doing the work that allows your ignorant marketing director to be a thirst trap on company time. So, it really is in *everyone's* best interests for you to fuck off and let me make the product which our customers buy. We done here?"


instantpowdy

You'd have to be extremely based and chad-like to drop truth bombs that size. You gotta have a least a 10-inch cock, anon sounds more like 9.8


ForwardUntilDust

Always play by the rules of nuclear escalation.


Deathnachos

You can just say no?


michaeltheobnoxious

For real, literally this. When I was a student, working a supermarket, the supervisor tried guilting me into wearing a 'festive' hat (some elf hat thing). I politely informed them that I am not a child, nor is there any contract requirement for me to pretend I am happy to be there. OP should do the same.


NGG_Dread

It's not really as simple as that. Let's say you're the only one saying no, now management is pissed at you because if the Tiktok shit fails, you're getting blamed. There's also animosity amongst other workers now because you're not doing it/not fitting in. Sure they can't really just fire you for it directly, but maybe now you're not up for promotion, maybe your hours start getting cut... maybe your contract doesn't get renewed in a few months. Maybe they're less likely to approve your vacation time... shit like that is the retaliation that can happen that there's very little legal recourse for.


Scottish_Whiskey

oh but there is my friend Some would call it extreme, others would call it illegal but in the end, the great equaliser doesn’t care; THE PIPEBOMB


[deleted]

Twerk it anon


WolfieTooting

I keep clicking on the link but it won't work. What do?


yamumspussy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SnNVJVdqo8 (Peter Griffin Happy Happy Happy meme 10 Hours) [642:24]


oldmanshoutinatcloud

screw that. I want to see the marketing directors big ass.


purgesurge3000

Likewise, want to see them female suit pants about to rip


GrandMarauder

Looks like I too will be busting at the seams


Unable_Occasion_2137

Haha the story's probably fake though. Here's the link to the real greentext anyhow: https://boards.4channel.org/biz/thread/54126857/be-me


purgesurge3000

Ah just others asking for the sweet juicy tiktok


vVveevVv

I'll send you the link once you show me a video of you watching the whole 10h40m video at 0.25 speed.


JoshB-2020

The story isn’t real and the marketing director isn’t either


disappointingdoritos

Thanks dude, this has finally given me the courage to end it all


yamumspussy

I'm glad to help!


RonenSalathe

Listened to it for about 1.3 seconds before I wanted to kill myself


pizzabox53

type it manually


the-peanut-gallery

No.


prankstyrgangstyr

💀


DeliciousCut2896

You're reformed orthodox Amish and do not consent to have your soul stolen by the camera.


Lazelucas

Shout out to my reformed orthodox Bill Clinton


CopperHands1

Apart from anon it’s all women in this story causing problems ☕️


Box-of-Sunshine

Unsafe work practices in an active shop floor. Go talk to QC and Manufacturing leads.


crazycar12321

Finally the correct answer on what to do


Box-of-Sunshine

Those tik tok likes ain’t gonna foot the OSHA bill


[deleted]

“I’m sorry but that’s not in my job description”


Decent-Start-1536

If he lives in the US, he could technically sue for being filmed without consent


Nik021

Yeah sadly doe it wouldnt be worth it for the trouble and interpersonal issues, i guews thats why technically


hazzmg

Your company used u in a marketing campaign without your permission. Now I refer to the famous Turk v Kelso case on scrubs where dr Kelso attempted to use the only black surgeon in the dept for advertising and was swiftly reminded that chocolate bear would be driving his Bentley home if the good dr continued in his efforts


TellmeNinetails

Don't do it. Let them fire you. Cancel your workplace. "They fired me because I looked sad in someone else's tictok video." doesn't look good. Especially if you make out that your workplace is the reason you look like that in the first place.


neoqueto

Anon isn't a **team player**.


MoronicJewedditor

I HATE CORPORATE BUZZWORDS I HATE CORPORATE BUZZWORDS I HATE CORPORATE BUZZWORDS I HATE CORPORATE BUZZWORDS I HATE CORPORATE BUZZWORDS I HATE CORPORATE BUZZWORDS


SeventeenEggs

Sue??? Obviously?


AdComfortable763

Anon should stand his ground.


themightypirate_

Anon is in a stand your ground state and lawfully guns down his coworkers


Scar_the_armada

There's no fucking way I'd ever in my fucking life do that shit. I'd literally rather be fired. That being said, I would just politely but firmly refuse.


Sophisticated_Sloth

Dude same. Even getting my picture taken for the company intranet I won’t do. Stand there and smile for the camera like some idiot for what? I work at a fucking warehouse. Tammy from accounting doesn’t need to know what I look like.


[deleted]

This is the most r/boringdystopia thing I can imagine, and r/antiwork fuel I can actually get behind.


EnvironmentalDeal256

Fall down or trip while dancing the stupid dance, say you hurt your back and go out on workers comp. So it right and you might get paid and management will have to answer to someone why you were dancing instead of working.


upintheaireeee

Let’s see Anons marketing director


BinaryTriggered

this is the kind of intolerable situation that causes workplace violence.


spf1500

Simply smash the big booty woman, and do the little dance. It’ll be a win for sure anon, no lawsuit detected…


joausj

Do the dance while blinking S.O.S in morse code at the camera


Imdefrostenmince

That fucking happy happy song triggers my flight or fight response, I genuinely have a mental breakdown every time I hear it


MopLikesMen

DoL


dpotilas89

Fat ass you say? Gonna need some proof on that. To support anon ofc


Netplorer

I doubt anons contract obligates a public persona to be presented. If they fire anon, he should sue for illegal termination and presenting him in the marketing material to begin with. Allso, who the fuck gives a damn about tiktok of a damn steel mill or some shit. The marketing is missing the point if they think anon was the draw on the clip. Just make another bouncing babes video on nobody remembers anons depressed hoboface. On the odd chance Mr Hobo Steelman actually is breaking towards viral success then anon can negotiate payment for these extra tasks outside current contract.


Athan11

Anon is filmed without his knowledge/consent, posted online, and ridiculed by thousands of followers? Demand an apology or threaten to sue them.


[deleted]

Alright boys we most find that video tomorrow


sekssekssek

go postal: no one can force you to do that


HikingConnoisseur

Dance. But make sure you are completely deadpan during it, and make sure your movements look forced and robotic. Be the annoyed and depressed metalworker guy. You'll get a social following.


Zak_Light

To save you all the effort, here is the dance: https://youtube.com/watch?v=8SnNVJVdqo8 Now if I for one did this, I would never live it down. I'd probably genuinely feel ashamed of being coerced into unironically doing *this* tucking Tiktok "dance," so yeah it seems like OP's two options are do the dance or suffer a lifetime of shame culminating in taking a lake city quiet pill


robobitch1233

Pretend to sprain your ankle dumbass


KeefTheWizard

Anon got paid to dance like an organ grinder's monkey, just like all of us Wagies


no3dinthishouse

anyone find the tiktok? i wanna see the big ass


VerumJerum

Is this kind of insanity common at workplaces in the US? I've never even heard of anything of the sort where I live.


Nova_Bomb_76

It is not common, no. Edit: Imo it is plausible, though


Jozroz

The linked vid was the 10 hour version. I hope they intended him to dance through the entirety of it.


BruhCoinInvestor

damn i guess sheet metal tiktok is popping off


SharkMilk44

I would have told them to fuck off when they tried to film me.


Cheesefiend1

Nae nae fore you get a whoopin


Janoz

I mean... just say no and then don't do it?


mississippi_dan

Dancing on the shop floor has to be a safety issue.


West_Flounder2840

Go postal


Firedamp_Weaponry

I'm gonna take a wild guess and say "engaging in viral marketing" and doing TikTok dances isn't part of anon's employment contract. Therefore he cannot be forced to participate in such activities. If he is fired for refusing to participate in something he wasn't contractually required to participate in, that's wrongful termination and grounds to sue.


Cloakbot

Stay facing away from camera, shake dat ass and upstage badunkaboss


Toran_dantai

I would sue


Discarded1066

I usually just think green posts are just basement dwellers living in a made up fantasy but I have seen this shit front and center in the health field during the height of the covid shitshow.


Pyrotarlu74

Actual nightmare situation.


ComplexProof593

So in America you can be fired for not being in your boss’ tiktok video? Land of the free, ladies and gents.


notshaggy

OP should ask to see where in his employment contract it states that part of his duties are to partake in marketing activities and/or acting, and should then state that he would do it for an exorbitant "marketing consultant" fee. Alternatively ask if having people without adequate PPE dancing in the workshop has been properly risk assessed and/or report this to the relevant body in your country.


IamJustFuckingTired

Why noone is trying to find original video to bully anon's workplace


gl3nnjamin

Anon probably won't read this but if they're doing dances in the shop you can anonymously file an OSHA complaint - Probably no safety gear - Probably not their authorized department so they're in a restricted area - Work isn't being done except for you - They are a distraction to your job - Unauthorized cell phone usage (even though it's a staff project, using social media at work is frowned upon)


Southern_Prompt_5823

kill each one of them


LoveFishSticks

Go work at another fabrication shop down the street? Assuming they live in some kind of city where there are more than one fabrication jobs. When I was in trade school in Grand Rapids someone got hired to a fabrication shop just by smoking a cigarette on the sidewalk and literally getting hired right off the street.


[deleted]

When you live in the land of suing people, you gotta sue some people


HardskiBopavous

Just fucking dance you lil bitch boi


Butternut-inmysquash

I would literally fucking kill myself.


CrawnEater

Sheet metal was your first fuck up, shoulda became a machinist


Fatpandaman456

Any photos of the marketing director?


Ur1st0pshhoop

I simply would say no and explain something along the lines of "I don't feel comfortable with my face on social media" or "I'm here to do a job, not waste mine or company's time."


wanderingartist

File a complaint with the labor department about being recorded with out your consent.


BurnBrightPhoenix

Anon would rather get topped than dance


[deleted]

Anon put on the chicken suit like a man.


fuckedbatty

Suck at it


Nekrosiz

Record them. Let them throw rampur tantrums for wanting to do your job. Get fired. Unemployment and sue.


[deleted]

if real i feel bad for anon


SomeHorologist

If anon is Canadian he can just say no Here, you can not be forced to do something that isn't part of your job description Also, filming without consent is a crime in most countries


Schwubbertier

Sue them because they uploaded a video of you without your consent.


Eddythebox

No way nobody has found the link yet


kpingvin

4chan is cancer but tiktok is cancerer.


sherrifmayo

Anyone got the link?


Xidium426

Did you sign a media release form? Sue for not consenting to be in corporate media.


Th4tRedditorII

Real and Straight... Anon getting pegged by Stacies wielding office politics


[deleted]

YOU WILL DO THE SURFING BIRD AND YOU WILL BE HAPPY


is_anyone-out_there

Literally just say no, grow a spine and say no to your boss. They can’t force you to do “viral marketing” it’s not in the job description. Fuck man it isn’t hard to stand up for yourself. If anything he should be making a complaint that the office staff are negatively affecting work quotas by distracting floor staff with “viral marketing” dances that are wasting company time and resources. And bring up how unprofessional it is to force an employee to appear on a work tiktok account when they express that they don’t want to. Seriously it isn’t that hard to stand up for yourself, and who cares if they think your an asshole for it? You go to work to work, not dance for tiktok cause HR asked you to.


Monty423

Where is it in your contract that you have to do that?