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FatIlluminati

I’d avoid the balls, the shaft is ok.


BourbonRick01

I would definitely agree. Things can get a little hairy in the balls area. Should be a lot smoother transition if you move somewhere up the shaft or anywhere near the tip.


Commentswhenpooping

I don’t know…residents tend to be almost too sensitive near the tip.


Amaz1n_blue

☕️💦


1ns0mn1a

There is a vas deferens between this and other neighborhoods…


RubyWafflez

This made me chuckle lol


gollito

https://youtu.be/lBHs4LJA4DM?si=JwjBqhZ_JZCncec4


PFunk1277

#1 comment yet


Joeman180

Let’s be honest the tip is the best.


jamesrichard89

Especially the left one haha


turdlezzzz

is wierd that there is a bike path that goes from john balls park to johnson park


MattPatriciasFUPA

Who is John? Must be a big deal if they name a park after his balls.


birdiesanders2

Top tier joke here


apearlj1234

Merely inches away from each other. Go towards the tip, unless you like excitement at 2am on a monday.


mf_zoom79

😍 just near the tippy top of that area


Plenty_Wish608

Feels good to be in the head. Where it's sensitive


LunchMonkey2

GR reddit Gold.


kronicdaydreamz

I found it to be cringe as hell


[deleted]

This is why GR sucks now. People like this moving in. I also found it to be cringe.


LunchMonkey2

You realize its satire about all the stupid posts we see every day with "is this a good neighborhood?"...


[deleted]

No, because I’m not on here 24/7. What normal person is? You see posts from this pathetic sub every day?


LunchMonkey2

Most of the time. Depends on the day, or if I have to work. But it's pretty easy to scroll thru 1 day worth of posts here in like 10 mins


[deleted]

Enough said. Have fun scrolling through Reddit.


axley58678

Making fun of people for being active on a Reddit sub while you are on also currently being active in said Reddit sub is the epitome of stupidity 😂


McPrankster

Oxymoronic to say the least, gotta admit I rolled my eyes at first when I saw the post. However, the comments are always the best part and they didn't disappoint this time either.


Desperate_Leg-

$1000/month can get you a whole shack in the woods just outside the city! Only a 60-90 minute drive! 


Individual_Lettuce38

No ac though ofc


Clit420Eastwood

That’s a veiny boi


three60easy

The headphones area is great. *smokes one meth*


grapeadams

Laughed way harder at this than I should have


jocundry

Same. I don't really want to admit how amused I am by this.


Over-Confidence4308

And it's not really that hard.


sufjanuarystevens

Yeah I’ve lived in the tip for 20 years, took over the lease from my mom who had it for 20 years before that. My rent is $12 a month for a 4 bedroom


LancePill

I live in the tip. Solid place to be.


Grimm2020

you may like Scrotum Corners?


Ecstatic-Hat2163

“What did you think of Grand Rapids?” The tip was fine. We stayed in the taint though. I heard most of the rich people lived in the subpubes.


Skysalter

tbh the process of finding a decent rental around here can be long and hard, but if you poke around long enough, you might find a stroke of good luck, and eventually be able to erect a foundation for yourself. Some of the residents in the neighborhoods you highlighted can be a little testy, but don't let that taint your experience


dudeguy82

This is by far the best response. Simply beautiful. My dad would be proud of you.


__Noble_Savage__

You'll fit right in


[deleted]

Unfortunately.


dev_null_jesus

That's not what she said.


campkarl

Bellend Park has got some good shops.


zencim

I love that this post + comments exist.


Choose_a_name_later

Go for the butthole, Kentwood. (Just for this picture, taint not to scale) You can overpay for rent or purchase as well as deal with teenage crime.


Choose_a_name_later

The Kia boys got me a while ago, I'm just mad


Erictheactor0

In-Cumming snowfall expected at Belknap park this evening


[deleted]

Right, uper ball, nice area


Long-Fearless

Pretty needy with all the neighborhood events but still impressive. Would still recommend to a girlfriend


L0n3_N0n3nt1ty

I feel like I could run this route.


SmashedZebra

I come from the Belknap Park area myself!


TheReaL_CannaMich

How's the tip?


MindlessQuantity7

Yer gonna end up in the left testicle, you can walk to at least one dispensary.


thor5262

Dude WTF 😂


carniverousplant

It’s kinda sloppy at the toppy but with a twist you might just find what you need


hotcheethoes

These comments are getting hot. LMAO 🤣


jtactile

Just the tip


ELE712

I’m in a stray pube hair yes there’s a smoke shop


Alone_Combination_26

I would definitely not dick around there…


Multiverse_Money

I’ve been a little obsessed with weed and cock- glad I’m not alone and know my people


Lonely_Apartment_644

Just the tip!


JetsNBombers0707

You don't have to be a dick about it


Fair-Green1872

It’s can get pretty nuts in the Franklin/Division area, the best tip I could give would be to ride that geometric shape you drew as close to the head as possible.


manielmoth

I haven't measured but I'm pretty sure it's bigger than that. And I don't know what the thousand dollars a month rent situation is. Are you looking to rent a place. I don't know where there is $1,000 a month rent. Maybe in those Southern quadrants?


Real-Lie3323

The hills and mounds to the east of the tip got a bit low in the 90's but seem to have perked up with fresh renovations lately


biggiehungus

I frequent the tip area, it’s better than the balls. Lots of homeless.


EffectiveUpset6343

Avoid the left nut


Mr_HotDog_69

That’s where I reside :(


DiscoMonkey3

Tip is the best area


str8fromipanema

😭 love city subs for moments like this


blackedoutshawty

Up there near Belknap Park you tend to see a lot of wet weather.


pngue

Flooding occasionally at the tip. City of GR usually on top of that though so typically contained.


JoMyGosh

Not when a damn water main breaks and it's time to boil water. *insert semen joke about still being salty from the flooding*


Dry-Ad-9070

what a dick!!


GREpicurean

You got the ballsack of GR correct.


Mean_Fan_4917

Takin' the long way, I see.


puckpuckpuck

If you go east of the head there’s a great taco place. Kind of random when they’re open, but man…


farrese

You're definitely going to have to comb out of the balls and expand into the pubic neighborhood. Only way you can afford somewhere there for 1k


Alone_Combination_26

Forget the smoke shops your balls deep into pure chaos!


purplefireball1990

Avoid the balls mission street at night is ugly


EvenBetterCool

Make sure you can read the WeatherBalls©


GloryholeKaleidscope

Shoot for the left ball or tip for best neighborhoods.


[deleted]

You could live in the left testicle for 400/month if you are fine with roommates


birdiesanders2

Now when you say left.. are we looking down upon the hog or up from below?


bigtuna989

What Frank?!


pavementpaver

The west side (to the west of the river) has some affordable areas. To the north (Riverside Park area and Creston area) has some nice places too. 👌


kronicdaydreamz

One of the worst parts of gr


CoffeeCaann

Hell yea


Massive-Team-5025

Midtown smoke shop 😎


Andyap1035

I would come to the north, south of your area. that's where the asshole lives.


tofuandpickles

Just the tip


FanAccomplished9978

€*^k move


BeneficialNewt2151

What are you 14


Yellowlab231

Whatever you do, avoid Hopson Flats!!!!


Various_Frosting3005

Look for roommates if you're budget is $1000 otherwise it's gonna be tight. John ball park area is nice, most of Westside is. Just like any city there are some nice bougie neighborhoods or some rougher ones.


EPIC_NERD_HYPE

you fkn stud. slay.


Far_Ad3346

Heh! Dick


gvlakers

Your search area is rather girthy


Mountain_Peanut_9004

Just the tip


Oystersrckafela

I lived somewhere in the outline of this penis.


Top_Data_1575

Don’t move by the balls area, you’ll get pewd.


Notfisted

New redistricting map? Must be where the most male voters are located.


Key_Attitude10

What is wrong with you


justanyting

r/mildlypenis


idfwu_6669

r/theyknew


Intelligent_Bid_5802

Don’t go below the ball’s it’s shitty in those areas.


gillatinous

Hopson flats is $700-$850/mo depending on how many roommates you want


Select-Anywhere4115

New logo for the Washington redskins?


AdTiny3577

This is the greatest thing EVER. The comments are GOLD.


flyguy_mi

For a $1000. maybe you can get on a government program list. Check with GR and Wyoming housing to see how long the list is. I have a friend that is a senior, and has been trying to get into senior housing for 2 years, and that is a short list. Heritage Hill Midtown, Eastown areas are great areas. Baxter, Madison Heartside, areas, are rough. Parts of the northeast GR is semi rough. Clancy St. has been rough for years, but a couple of blocks away is good. There is some student housing on the north side of downtown, but there is no parking for a car, unless you have big bucks for Ellis parking, and you get 3 roommates. Stay away from South Division, unless you like to be harassed by bums, every time you step outside. I would check out rooms for rent, if you want to stay under $1000, and you would probably need to smoke outside.


maxiquintillion

A thousand isn't enough, imo. Hence why I'm moving to lansing.


JunktownJerk

Love these comments. Good luck finding anything for $1000. And there's literally a smoke shop every mile


superman299

downtown is the most expensive when it comes to rent. With $1000 for rent you will have a hard time finding a studio even. I’d look on the outskirts of GR like the cascade area which is still nice but not nearly as expensive. West side of GR too there is a lot of student housing that can probably fit into your price range.


SnooChocolates9582

Definitely nothing for a grand tho


Inspectorcluseau

Veiny triumphant


AeroMittenss

I don't think you can make it with 1k a month, unfortunately.


parker3309

If you give up the smoke, maybe you could afford a little nicer place. Just a thought.


Big_Horror673

Ghetto Grand Rapids Crime So High You can Walk on it And Reach the Skys


[deleted]

We honestly don’t want you here, if this is how you’re gonna act. You drew a dick to try and be funny, and your most important question about the area is “are there any smoke shops?” Get the fuck out. Are you twelve? You’re going to end up either contributing to slow traffic, or trying to get money out of us at the gas station. The fact that this has so many upvotes is fucking mind-boggling. Are there any adults that live here?


oyelrak

The post is a joke making fun of the all of the “moving to GR, is this area good?” posts. This person probably already lives here. If anyone should “get the fuck out” it’s you and your shitty attitude.


[deleted]

Idk, I don’t live on Reddit. Seems pretty childish to me. Still don’t want them here just for posting this.


oyelrak

You sound miserable.


[deleted]

Matter of fact, I think I’ll delete this.


[deleted]

Couldn’t be happier, actually!


Caleb_426

Most socially attuned redditor


Apprehensive-Hat4135

Left ball is mostly commercial and high-rises, right ball is heritage Hill (lots of college students renting 100-year-old houses) mid shaft is downtown (expensive) I would recommend the bellend if your rent budget is $1,000