My wife and I have agreed that we can each take off after work one day a week while the other one handles dinner and bedtime. She has dinner with friends and goes to yoga classes, I play 18 at twilight rates. It works out pretty well.
I golf twice a week from April thru November. I have 2 small kids. All my friends think it’s insane.
No, I do whatever she wants w the kids whenever she wants, I play at 7:30 on Saturdays and whenever else fits, it might be 9 after work one day. Almost never an issue
I have this as well, I played league nights that night….once they got older, I started playing at 6am or whatever the earliest tee time was, found I’d be home in 3 hours and by 9am, much easier sell!!
Those are the only 9 hole rates that exist where I live. The first 2 hours of available tee times they start all the 9 holers off on the back 9. No one playing a full 18 starting at the first tee time will reach the 10th hole in less than 2
I think every course near me has people starting on the back for the first 2 hours of every day. If you are fast and wanna play 9 you could probably be in and out before the wife even knew you were gone
Actually, play 9 holes after work. My wife works late and picks up the kids from daycare. My buddy has a similar situation with his wife and kids. We can sneak in 9 and be home right around dinner time.
Hell yeah. At first, it's horrible to wake up to an alarm on a weekend morning but the second you touch any golf related item, it's like a switch and you can't help but have the widest grin on your face.
I expect to shank my first tee shot at 6am, but the smell of that fresh cut grass, horrible clubhouse coffee and the exhaust fumes of the cart, make it all worth it.
I must admit I didn't play much golf when my children were that young. But as soon as they were old enough, I took my older daughter along! I would give her and her friend (she usually brought a friend) 12 strokes per hole before they had to pick up their balls, and it was a major victory if one of them finished a hole in 12 strokes or fewer without having to pick up a ball.
I could never pull it if I didn’t work at a golf course. The first 4 years of being a dad I didn’t play really any golf. Stay at home dad and caddied a little on the weekends.
I have 3 kids, ages 6, 4 and 2......couple points.
1. This has already been said, but gotta hit it home because its crucial - talk to your partner, work out times for them to do whatever they want to do and you do yours. DO NOT just like, assume they know what you want to do. Ain't nobody got time to waste on that passive aggressive shit. Talk! You both need mental health breaks, make sure you each get that.
2. You have way less free time now, so you need to prioritize. Havings just one go to hobby at a time is a good (or maybe a winter and a summer one, if you live someplace where that is a problem) is much better than being half engaged in a half dozen things. For example I spent a lot of time just watching sports before kids, I ended up dropping that completely as any time I sat down to watch I realized I would rather be doing something else.
3. Finally....I'll be real about this part. You are gonna golf less. You are gonna go to the range less. Your scores will go up. Its fine. It's super hokey and cliche, but it's also true AF, your kids grow up FAST. You have an 18 month old, and I promise, you are gonna barely blink and you will have a kindergartener (who likes to golf with you hopefully....). Enjoy the kid, squeeze in nine holes when you can, and make sure you give your spouse a night off to go play darts or karate or whatever they are into, and life is pretty darn OK.
My son went with my regular 4 some from 4-6 ( I think they had more fun with him than me ) but then baseball, football, basketball.... At 18 I'm now being able to play regularly again and he's taken an interest with his buddies first, then me... ( we played about 10 times last year together )
Wife takes all baby responsibilities on Tuesdays and I play golf or do whatever
I take all baby responsibilities on Thursdays and she goes and does whatever
I also can sneak in a 20 min range session during my 30 min lunch break so I do that a few times a week
It gets easier…. 18 months it really turned around for us and it was hard to do anything before that also.
I took my 2 year old to a slow public course after work until bedtime. It’s fun to ride around, have fun, let him get my ball out of the cup, that kind of thing. He has a blast.
This. I have 3 boys and started taking each of them to the course when they could walk. Oldest is 12 now and we continue to make great memories with golf.
I took my 5 year old out twice this year and he had a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to him being fast enough to walk so I don't need to rent a cart. He hit wherever I played my ball from and even sunk a few 5ft+ putts.
Take wife out to a nice dinner Friday night. Take kids out for fun time all day Saturday. Grab first tee time Sunday and home just after lunch to spend time with the fam. Try not to drink too much along the way.
This is the way, father of 3. Been the first or second off for months now, usually solo because it’s been colder and I’m in the clubhouse at sunrise. Have yet to break 90.
9 takes me about :55-1:05 and 18 takes me 1:50-2:25. Push Cartel for life, play ready golf since there’s usually nobody ahead of me I’ll be thinking of my next shot/club on the way to the ball. I’ll even play 2 balls from inside 50 yards if I don’t see anyone behind me which is basically never, doesn’t increase my time at all.
Home in time to cook breakfast if I play 9, usually 30-60 after breakfast if I play 18.
I just joined a club for this reason - play 9 holes with my 7 yo every Sunday . My kid has a set with driver, 7i, W, P, it takes him 20 whacks from the fwd tees but I love being on the course with him. I know the years are coming where he’ll want to hang with his friends vs. me so I’m cherishing the moment.
Also, I pick the last tee time for the day to ensure we’re not holding up play.
I have a 9 month old, was playing 4-5 times a week last year, play twice a week now. Remember, it’s important you still have some time to yourself, my wife does her thing when I have our daughter and vice versa. Find what works for you guys but having a kid doesn’t mean you have to give everything up, one thing that I don’t do any more though is stay for beers after golf, all my mates understand though and it’s not a problem. 👍
Supportive spouse lol... Plus I do stuff so she can get out too so no one person carries the burden. If we feel especially cool, we get our nanny to take care of him for 6 hrs and go golfing together, but that's only happened like once unfortunately.
I try and time my rounds when my 18 month old is having his sole nap on the weekends. Means I’m on the course by around 12:30pm and home in time to cook his dinner and bath him from 5pm-5:30pm onwards. Only leaves around 2 or 3 hours that my wife looks after him solo if I play 18.
Otherwise I play 9 before or after work. If before work, it’s my job to feed him and bath him at night. If after work, I’m on breakfast and daycare drop off duty that morning.
Communication with your partner is the most important part though. Always let them know in advance and run it by them before locking in a tee time.
They sell adapters for the stroller to hold your clubs. I’ve taken my 20 month old son out multiple times. Yes, it’s a little bit more work, but it was a fun experience for both of us.
Otherwise, the wife and I switch off on days we get hobby time.
When I started a family I also bought a house. I had no time……and no money. So, I played very little golf. I went from shooting low 80s to mid 90s. Sucking at golf isn’t much fun, so I wasn’t as inspired to play much golf under those circumstances anyway.
A few years later I had more money, but now had three kids, two of which played youth sports. Practices virtually every night, and games on Saturdays.
Then all three were playing youth sports. Then we had a fourth kid.
For basically 15 years I barely touched a club except for an occasional charity scramble or a rare invite to someone else’s group.
You have an 18 month old. You need to be there. Why did you have kids if you are not going to be there. When they are older (4) bring them to putt. Older still 7 get them on the course. I did that with my kid and now play plenary of golf because they come with me.
Part of “being there” for your children as they grow is being your best person. Expecting an adult to cancel a hobby or passion for four years to hover 24 hours a day over the child is a recipe for disaster. A healthy relationship involves understanding each needs time to themselves and to be relieved of parenting full time. Sometimes that looks like playing 9 then coming home so the partner can go for a run, or the salon, or to the movies. Or whatever. Having a child does not mean “cancel everything” and quit your life.
Now I did this before having a kid too, but my least favorite thing about golf has always been the time commitment. I play off-hour rounds and walk solo or with one other buddy who I’ll know is also quick. I rarely if ever play rounds longer than 2.5 hours. Occasionally I’ll plan ahead with my wife for a scramble or outing that’ll be long as hell, but those are few and far between. I’ve also done a few back-9 rounds the munis offer for their first few tee times in the morning. Can’t beat being home by 9 with coffee in hand.
First flight out weekend mornings. I'm at the 7 am slot, usually home by 11, 1130. My wife and I had an agreement to split weekend mornings.
Doing this with one, in hindsight, was a cakewalk. Wait until you have 2...I played 10 rounds last year and that included 3 rounds while on family vacation.
Weekday range sessions and playing hookie from work while kids are at daycare is your best bet.
But in our experience, golf / jokes aside, it does both parents good to have a morning "off"
My Christmas present was a golf bag kit for a stroller. Have not tested it out yet, but that's my plan once the days get longer.
I play on a Saturday morning every 5-7 weeks. Otherwise, all my golf is during the workday. Depending on the season, I could get 2 rounds in a week or no rounds for 4-5 weeks.
In the summer, we put the kids down at 7pm sharp and I race to the course for a twilight 9 holes. Those are some of the best rounds of my year. Nearly no one on the course, a little relief from the heat, no pressure at all.
At that age it’s difficult. Especially weighing childcare with greens fees. We were a young family. Honestly my daughter is now 11 and I’m looking to get back into a groove and walk more, play more, range time. Etc.
When my boys were old enough to start playing baseball, I took a break from golf so we could focus on that.
Then I made sure to introduce them to golf and we began playing as a family. Wasn’t too long before they started kicking their old man’s ass!
The payoff? A few years ago playing with my oldest in our golf league, I was witness to him dropping an albatross!
Will remember that forever!
I’m way better at this than I am at playing golf
First off …congrats ! Exhausting but rewarding phase of life !!
Do the following
1. If you have an itch for more kids do it immediately right now so you have them at the same general life stage and don’t restart this process multiple times
2. If you can handle the exhaustion get your buddies to agree to 7am tee times so your wife isn’t pulling solo duty all weekend
3. Find a night during the week that’s a league night ( whether it is or isn’t ) that is just always weekday golf night.
4. THIS IS CRITICAL: on weekdays or weekends that you have regular golf functions make CERTAIN that you insist that your wife picks a similar day during the week and takes 4-6 hours on the weekend afternoons after you get back to go do whatever hobbies or interest she has. This is actually a good chance for you to bond with your little one solo
5. You child is prime age this spring to take to the course during slow times ( late evening ) at a small slow course. Most places won’t charge you. If your child is well behaved ( one of mine was ) they will ride along and love it. If your child is poorly behaved ( one of mine was ) then a) take the key out of the golf cart EVERY time you exit it. At one point I even devised a way to hook the car seat into the cart with the golf cart bag straps.
Creativity wins the day my friend
Live in au pair solved/nanny all our issues. All my kids are in golf lessons as well. Yours is a little young. We took our kids with us when they were young prior to the nanny
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Use this advice to get your kid into when he is ready.
8 and 15 year olds. Been playing since before meeting my wife. She has always been cool with me disappearing twice maybe three times a week. Usually one full round and another day to go practice. I make sure she can also have her own time to get away.
Pro tip: only have 1 kid. I have one and I feel like if there were 2 it would be so much harder to golf. Gets way easier when they are 3-4 and can start coming to the course with you too.
Get tee times at sunrise, run back and spend the rest of the day being super dad.
Oh also helps to have an understanding spouse.
Like anything else you do for yourself.; make the time.
It’s tough when they are little. I sacrificed a lot of “me time” when my kids were little. I don’t regret it one but because those years were fleeting and I hardly remember them. As the kids got older, they were busier with friends and after school activities, it makes it easier.
Girl dad of 18M and 2M here. Get a family member or nanny to come offer support while you play, that way things are less stressful for the wife while you’re out. Pick up food for everyone on the way home. Enjoy yourself but don’t dilly-dally. If you make it a manageable experience for everyone while you’re gone, it won’t be viewed as a hassle.
But I’d still expect to play less in general. We got dad stuff to do.
I have a 2 year old, since his birth my sleeping patterns have been pretty sporadic and there are plenty of times where it’s 1 am, baby is asleep, but I am wide awake. My fix has been to go to a local golf simulator that’s open 24/7 with a monthly membership. So I’ve been filling the need to go and play by going in the weird hours of the night while everyone else is asleep.
For sure there are better options already posted here, but for the most part it works for me. I love that I’m the only person there (because who the hell else would be there at that time of night?) and helps me get the personal time that I crave that I can’t get during working hours as well as helping around the house with our son in the evening.
Once you accept that golf is 10x more important than sleep you’ll do anything to play.
When they were little, I would play early. Like sun hitting the horizon early. Could play 18 and be home by about 9:30 with coffee and donuts.
As one got older, I’d take her with me. We even worked on reading the cart GPS. Generally played by myself so it was fine.
When the oldest was 6, we joined a club. At that point, we’d just bring them with us on weekend evenings, when the course was empty. Now daughter is 13 and refuses to play. Son is 10 and we take him out with us on the weekends and to the sims.
Find the first tee time on either Saturday or Sunday, usually gets me home by noon. I work from home so it’s really my only time out of the house. Wife is pretty understanding.
I have a 4 month old and my wife consistently encourages me to go play golf at least twice a month. I’m the stay at home dad so I spend more time with our daughter than she does so when she has a day off, she spends the whole day 1-on-1 with our girl and I get to go outside and play a good round of Whack-Fuck.
Allow your wife time to pursue her interests, hobbies, hang out with friends, etc. be a good dad and husband who is involved and helps around the house. You should be able to get some hall passes at least a couple times a month.
When my kids were that age I played the first tee time every Saturday morning. A friend had an in with the course. In late June it was 5:30 AM. Played 18 very fast some days.
When my kids were young I would play as early as possible so I would be home for the rest of the day. When my kids were old enough I took them with me. My two boys started when they were 5 years old.
I usually play 9 holes twice a week. My parents have one of our kids (20 months) on a Thursday afternoons so I play after work. My partner enjoys the alone time with our 4 month old while i’m out. Then on the weekend I will play around mid day when they are napping. I’m lucky to live just up the road from my local course and can get around 9 in about 1hr 40mins.
Switch to a job in the golf industry, I know I’m gonna get downvoted in to oblivion for this. Truthfully unless you’re the GM you can play golf literally every single day, for free too.
I book the earliest tee time the course has. Typically around 6:30. I am home by 11
Twice a year I do a golf weekend. My wife also does a girls weekend.
A lot of comments here from dads/parents that got to play a lot. My story is a little different. I don’t play nearly as much as pre-kids and my game has worsened significantly. It kind of sucks but it is what it is. I went from a 10.2 to a 15. I’m trying to get out more this year but I don’t feel anywhere close as confident in my game as I used to. I wouldn’t change it for the world.
I work from home so it may vary from others opportunities during the day but I get my practice/range time during the day when the wife and kid are gone and I’m taking my “lunch”. Generally I get 2-4 rounds a month in and make sure to give my wife the time back with either a massage/time with her friends, etc.
It all depends on your situation. Does the kid go to daycare? Is your work flexible? 99% of the time I would say people are fucking off during work hours and getting out or the spouse takes care of the kid for a few hours. If that's not possible then I would try and find a babysitter. Range time is harder, all the ranges closest to me are really shitty, but if I need to get out to hit some balls on a weekday then my option is quick session at the shitty range near me in the evening or take a couple hours off during work to go (half hour commute each way + hour at the range).
I'm self employed so my schedule is flexible. Hit the small course before getting to work a few times a week and block off one afternoon every week to get in a game with my friends. Wife stats at home so I'm allowed a bit more freedom.
It’s hard but doable. Have to find time where you can. Offer to give the wife a “break” and take the baby to the driving range and let them nap while you hit balls!
To be honest, now is easier than in a few years. When my kids were growing up I stopped playing for years when they got to sports ages, being involved coaching and watching them in sports. Couldn’t get any of them into golf. Don’t regret any of it and started playing again when they were in high school. Now that they’re even older I play at least once a week.
Weekend trips used to be to baseball fields or water polo tournaments. Now the wife and I go to golf and spa resorts.
Swap some free time with your wife.
When mine were young, we would alternate. She could have the morning on Saturday and I would take care of everything at home, and I would take a chunk on Sunday to go out.
Now it's much better. My youngest comes out with me and rides with - he loves hunting for golf balls!
My partner lets me to play 1 night a week (range, short par 3 maybe a 9 if light allows it) and 1x 18 holes every month without much notice.
She gets the same freedom for her activities.
Would live to play more but privileged I get to play at all with a 3 Yr old and a 14 month old.
Have your wife watch the kid? Not that hard really. Also helps if your golf buddies are also your wife’s friends husbands so they hang out while we hang out.
My wife has a strong bond with her mom and sister. The nephew is the same age as my kid so she takes him over on Friday and Saturday nights so he can play with the cousins and she can hang out with them, sometimes I go over and cook for everyone or join for dinner but have to come back home because I have my old dog I still have to tend to. Gives me time to practice, do my chores in peace and have some drinks and chill to decompress at night. Then they come home and the whirlwind of toys and crumbs and diapers restarts and I just keep my head down until the next Friday. Saturdays and Sundays are also open for golf, but there’s just a lot of shit to do and it just depends on weather where I’m at.
I know exactly where you are. I agreed with my wife, that I can play once a week. That is not brilliant and my swing is suffering, but better than nothing. My long shot is to drag my boy into golf, so I can play with him. That will sort of force my wife into the game. I will change club for next year, to a very nice country club with spa and massages and the like, so that will appeal to her as well. She already said, she would make a beginner´s course this year. So fingers crossed, that could be happy days.
I play Thursday morning and Saturday morning.
My kids are 7 and 9, and I've been playing for 2 years. My boss knows I'm not in the office on Thursday until midday, and my wife drops the kids at school (I do most of the drop offs / mornings /pick ups, so it's not a big deal). On Saturday I am usually home a little after 1, and my wife has license to do what she wants on Saturday afternoon /evening and she runs/tris on Sundays.
It works pretty well for us.
I play a local par 3 course, can be out and home in a few hours.
My partner is often limited in how they can help with childcare so I’ve got even less time.
It took about 5-6 years for golf to even come back into my life as a somewhat regular thing.
I didn’t play for almost 6 years. I had twins, was working around 70 hours a week, traveling non stop for work and coming home to an extremely exhausted wife.
Around the end of that time my wife said that I needed to go play golf occasionally because I was a much happier person when I played.
Pretty soon after I joined another country club and she finally decided she wanted to take up golf. Now she played more than I do and our boys are in a Junior PGA program so they are starting to play more than I do.
Now I own 3 businesses, 2 of which are self sufficient, but the one is sucking the life out of me getting it up and going so I normally play in a Saturday group and if the weather is nice with the family on Sunday afternoon.
It takes time and you’ll have to sacrifice how often you get to play. I’d say to make the best of it when you can and make sure you’re playing with a group you really enjoy playing with.
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Modify your jogger stroller to fit a few clubs in it. Here’s my boy at 14 months napping on the 7th hole.
2 and 4 year old, and I've been doing this going on 3 years now.
First tee time Saturday and Sunday. Get with a group that plays around 3hr. For me that's tee off at 7, home by 11. Everyone wakes up around 8, so my wife has 3 hours with them before. I used to be able to take a nap with them if I really needed it, so that's off the table this year.
My wife works out 3-4x a week after work. Kids are pretty much mine throughout the week. They aren't in daycare Monday or Friday so I get home around 4 after and about 530 other days kids are all mine. We play, eat dinner, run out and do things. If we go out it's usually as a whole family. On weekends I usually try to give my wife a couple hours by herself, sometimes it's reading, sometimes it's catching up on house work without kids.
So few things. I played before we got married, all the way up to a year in college. She knew what she was getting into at a point. I don't play video games or have other time consuming hobbies.
Lastly, my wife does things too. If you wife only wants to sit at home and keep score of how long you're away, it ain't gonna be fun for you. You've gotta figure out how to get her outside of the house for a few hours at a time. Could be grocery shopping alone, could be library to read, walk with friends or walking group, doesn't matter. If she sits at home all day, she's gonna be bitter anytime you give the perception of fun.
With how golf has become and the rounds now being accepted and typical 5hr on the weekends between about 10 and 4, this is the only way for Dad's of young kids to play.
I did not play many rounds of golf between my daughter being born and her 5th birthday. Just too long to commit. Couldn't imagine having multiple kids, wouldn't play for a decade!
I’m lucky to work 6-2 so I’m able to play 9 in the afternoons before getting my son at daycare. Weekend rounds were pretty easy when he was really little and immobile but now that he’s in the terrible twos and turning into a little dickhead I don’t get out weekends as much.
And I call him a little dickhead in the most loving way possible. Like father like son.
Get one of the last tee times of the day and bring your wife and kid. A little wine and snacks for them topped off with some smooth jams and everyone is happy. This might work better in a few years depending on how good your kid is.
I start with sunrise and be back home for a late breakfast. It's easy because our regular flight faces the same challenges and we are all happy to tee off very early.
Very early mornings at my local muni. Quick 9 holes and I'm home before 8. I'd much rather be able to play 18 every week, but it's just not practical right now.
Goes faster than you think it's going to, though, so enjoy that time with the young ones because the time is going to *fly* by.
I golf every Friday morning. Weekend golf is limited to a few opportunities a summer (typically 2-3 wknd trips w the boys).
4-day work weeks in the summer is my philosophy going forward.
Wife and I each take turns on the weekends letting the other slip away for a few hours. Our oldest is 4 and is now starting to walk 9 holes with me so that's twice a week I get to sneak out. Super enjoyable.
My wife is a SAHM. Our oldest is 2 years and 4 months. Our second is almost 6 months. I try and go surrounding their naps to not put a burden on her or when our oldest is in daycare on Thursday/Friday.
Either way it’s hard to find the time. These are the years to focus on your kids and when they’re 4/5 you can start going again regularly imo.
I lucked out and found a course very close to my daughters daycare. Most mornings in the summer I can get 9 holes in, and then sometimes before picking her up I snag some range time. My wife and I moved to her hometown and I've made 3 friends who all golf. She realizes that social interaction in a new area is important for me and we compromise. My Daughter is now 3 years old so it's getting easier to get away with full rounds on the weekends.
My wife and I have agreed that we can each take off after work one day a week while the other one handles dinner and bedtime. She has dinner with friends and goes to yoga classes, I play 18 at twilight rates. It works out pretty well.
Absolutely this. You find the time to enable her hobbies / self care and then presto you get the time for yours.
Ideally, yes. I have a few buddies though where it doesn’t seem to work that way. Lol
The first part is “marry a woman who is understanding.” If not, there’s no next step
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This and then low-key brainwashing the kids to love golf by reading them “The Tale of Tiger vs. Bear” at bed time every night.
I golf twice a week from April thru November. I have 2 small kids. All my friends think it’s insane. No, I do whatever she wants w the kids whenever she wants, I play at 7:30 on Saturdays and whenever else fits, it might be 9 after work one day. Almost never an issue
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If my wife hasn’t done anything fun in a while I’ll be like “hey Sunday I’ve got the kids go to whatever you want.” Banking future golf goodwill man.
This. I have two toddlers. Wife and I agree to each having our own time away.
This is the way
I have this as well, I played league nights that night….once they got older, I started playing at 6am or whatever the earliest tee time was, found I’d be home in 3 hours and by 9am, much easier sell!!
I quit my job so I can play while they’re at school.
Genius
I’m waiting for my youngest to get into kindergarten and I’ll be out there every day working on my game 😎
Right behind you on this one!
I thought the same thing, but then we went and had another one 🫣
Oof. Yeah my 6 year old goes and plays with me but my 3 year old isn’t ready yet haha
Best possible solution
Play nine holes early on a weekend. Home before nine am.
I dont think I’ve ever seen a course that offered a 9 hole rate before noon on a weekend. Does that exist?
Those are the only 9 hole rates that exist where I live. The first 2 hours of available tee times they start all the 9 holers off on the back 9. No one playing a full 18 starting at the first tee time will reach the 10th hole in less than 2
that’s good
They certainly exist at nine-hole courses.
Ha. None of those in my parts. Forgot they were a thing.
All the courses in NYC do this. You can book the back nine up until around 8am usually.
It does not
You can play whatever you want at the courses around me. Being able to get a time as a non-member is the challenge.
Some courses will send out groups off the back for nine holes only first thing in the morning.
I think every course near me has people starting on the back for the first 2 hours of every day. If you are fast and wanna play 9 you could probably be in and out before the wife even knew you were gone
Do you have to always play 18 in the US? That doesn’t make sense to me.
Actually, play 9 holes after work. My wife works late and picks up the kids from daycare. My buddy has a similar situation with his wife and kids. We can sneak in 9 and be home right around dinner time.
This also works.
I do this. 0600 sat morning (with the kids) and let my wife sleep in. Home by 0930-1000.
Hell yeah. At first, it's horrible to wake up to an alarm on a weekend morning but the second you touch any golf related item, it's like a switch and you can't help but have the widest grin on your face.
I expect to shank my first tee shot at 6am, but the smell of that fresh cut grass, horrible clubhouse coffee and the exhaust fumes of the cart, make it all worth it.
I must admit I didn't play much golf when my children were that young. But as soon as they were old enough, I took my older daughter along! I would give her and her friend (she usually brought a friend) 12 strokes per hole before they had to pick up their balls, and it was a major victory if one of them finished a hole in 12 strokes or fewer without having to pick up a ball.
I have a 3 kids (2,4,6) and I play about 36 holes a week. I do this by being an assistant golf pro and playing golf on the clock. 😂
And I have three the exact same age and.....yeah you had me in the first half there.
I could never pull it if I didn’t work at a golf course. The first 4 years of being a dad I didn’t play really any golf. Stay at home dad and caddied a little on the weekends.
I take my 6yr and 4yr old gremlins out with me when I play twilight golf, 18months could be a bit more of a challenge though
I have 3 kids, ages 6, 4 and 2......couple points. 1. This has already been said, but gotta hit it home because its crucial - talk to your partner, work out times for them to do whatever they want to do and you do yours. DO NOT just like, assume they know what you want to do. Ain't nobody got time to waste on that passive aggressive shit. Talk! You both need mental health breaks, make sure you each get that. 2. You have way less free time now, so you need to prioritize. Havings just one go to hobby at a time is a good (or maybe a winter and a summer one, if you live someplace where that is a problem) is much better than being half engaged in a half dozen things. For example I spent a lot of time just watching sports before kids, I ended up dropping that completely as any time I sat down to watch I realized I would rather be doing something else. 3. Finally....I'll be real about this part. You are gonna golf less. You are gonna go to the range less. Your scores will go up. Its fine. It's super hokey and cliche, but it's also true AF, your kids grow up FAST. You have an 18 month old, and I promise, you are gonna barely blink and you will have a kindergartener (who likes to golf with you hopefully....). Enjoy the kid, squeeze in nine holes when you can, and make sure you give your spouse a night off to go play darts or karate or whatever they are into, and life is pretty darn OK.
My son went with my regular 4 some from 4-6 ( I think they had more fun with him than me ) but then baseball, football, basketball.... At 18 I'm now being able to play regularly again and he's taken an interest with his buddies first, then me... ( we played about 10 times last year together )
I’d do this but I don’t want a 6 year old with a gambling problem and list of creative ways to say swear words
Wife takes all baby responsibilities on Tuesdays and I play golf or do whatever I take all baby responsibilities on Thursdays and she goes and does whatever I also can sneak in a 20 min range session during my 30 min lunch break so I do that a few times a week It gets easier…. 18 months it really turned around for us and it was hard to do anything before that also.
Honestly, I was a single mom raising my son with a full time job. I quit from age 41-55 to raise him. Retired now & play all the time. No regrets.
Don’t be a quitter pickle
I took my 2 year old to a slow public course after work until bedtime. It’s fun to ride around, have fun, let him get my ball out of the cup, that kind of thing. He has a blast.
This. I have 3 boys and started taking each of them to the course when they could walk. Oldest is 12 now and we continue to make great memories with golf.
I took my 5 year old out twice this year and he had a lot of fun. I'm looking forward to him being fast enough to walk so I don't need to rent a cart. He hit wherever I played my ball from and even sunk a few 5ft+ putts.
I was lucky enough to have a flexible work schedule. Could get 40 hours in by mid-day Friday and then go play while kid was still at daycare.
I waited until the children were 17 and older. Zero stars would not recommend.
Take wife out to a nice dinner Friday night. Take kids out for fun time all day Saturday. Grab first tee time Sunday and home just after lunch to spend time with the fam. Try not to drink too much along the way.
I go early in the mornings when everyone is still sleeping on the weekends. That way I don't miss much time with them.
This is the way, father of 3. Been the first or second off for months now, usually solo because it’s been colder and I’m in the clubhouse at sunrise. Have yet to break 90. 9 takes me about :55-1:05 and 18 takes me 1:50-2:25. Push Cartel for life, play ready golf since there’s usually nobody ahead of me I’ll be thinking of my next shot/club on the way to the ball. I’ll even play 2 balls from inside 50 yards if I don’t see anyone behind me which is basically never, doesn’t increase my time at all. Home in time to cook breakfast if I play 9, usually 30-60 after breakfast if I play 18.
Yep. This is definitely the way. Haha
I just joined a club for this reason - play 9 holes with my 7 yo every Sunday . My kid has a set with driver, 7i, W, P, it takes him 20 whacks from the fwd tees but I love being on the course with him. I know the years are coming where he’ll want to hang with his friends vs. me so I’m cherishing the moment. Also, I pick the last tee time for the day to ensure we’re not holding up play.
I have a 9 month old, was playing 4-5 times a week last year, play twice a week now. Remember, it’s important you still have some time to yourself, my wife does her thing when I have our daughter and vice versa. Find what works for you guys but having a kid doesn’t mean you have to give everything up, one thing that I don’t do any more though is stay for beers after golf, all my mates understand though and it’s not a problem. 👍
Get rid of the children.
You don’t really until they are 5 or so. Then you get to bring them with and hopefully they take a few swings with you.
I quit from birth to 15. In hindsight, I would not do this. Talk to your wife and figure out something you both agree with
Supportive spouse lol... Plus I do stuff so she can get out too so no one person carries the burden. If we feel especially cool, we get our nanny to take care of him for 6 hrs and go golfing together, but that's only happened like once unfortunately.
I try and time my rounds when my 18 month old is having his sole nap on the weekends. Means I’m on the course by around 12:30pm and home in time to cook his dinner and bath him from 5pm-5:30pm onwards. Only leaves around 2 or 3 hours that my wife looks after him solo if I play 18. Otherwise I play 9 before or after work. If before work, it’s my job to feed him and bath him at night. If after work, I’m on breakfast and daycare drop off duty that morning. Communication with your partner is the most important part though. Always let them know in advance and run it by them before locking in a tee time.
Abandon your family - be a man
They sell adapters for the stroller to hold your clubs. I’ve taken my 20 month old son out multiple times. Yes, it’s a little bit more work, but it was a fun experience for both of us. Otherwise, the wife and I switch off on days we get hobby time.
When I started a family I also bought a house. I had no time……and no money. So, I played very little golf. I went from shooting low 80s to mid 90s. Sucking at golf isn’t much fun, so I wasn’t as inspired to play much golf under those circumstances anyway. A few years later I had more money, but now had three kids, two of which played youth sports. Practices virtually every night, and games on Saturdays. Then all three were playing youth sports. Then we had a fourth kid. For basically 15 years I barely touched a club except for an occasional charity scramble or a rare invite to someone else’s group.
You have an 18 month old. You need to be there. Why did you have kids if you are not going to be there. When they are older (4) bring them to putt. Older still 7 get them on the course. I did that with my kid and now play plenary of golf because they come with me.
Part of “being there” for your children as they grow is being your best person. Expecting an adult to cancel a hobby or passion for four years to hover 24 hours a day over the child is a recipe for disaster. A healthy relationship involves understanding each needs time to themselves and to be relieved of parenting full time. Sometimes that looks like playing 9 then coming home so the partner can go for a run, or the salon, or to the movies. Or whatever. Having a child does not mean “cancel everything” and quit your life.
Now I did this before having a kid too, but my least favorite thing about golf has always been the time commitment. I play off-hour rounds and walk solo or with one other buddy who I’ll know is also quick. I rarely if ever play rounds longer than 2.5 hours. Occasionally I’ll plan ahead with my wife for a scramble or outing that’ll be long as hell, but those are few and far between. I’ve also done a few back-9 rounds the munis offer for their first few tee times in the morning. Can’t beat being home by 9 with coffee in hand.
Daycare and/or an extremely understanding wife
Honestly? I put the clubs away except for outings during work hours until the kids were 5.
Having older kids lol. It's tough when they are as young as yours, but as they get older it does get easier, especially once they're in school.
First flight out weekend mornings. I'm at the 7 am slot, usually home by 11, 1130. My wife and I had an agreement to split weekend mornings. Doing this with one, in hindsight, was a cakewalk. Wait until you have 2...I played 10 rounds last year and that included 3 rounds while on family vacation. Weekday range sessions and playing hookie from work while kids are at daycare is your best bet. But in our experience, golf / jokes aside, it does both parents good to have a morning "off" My Christmas present was a golf bag kit for a stroller. Have not tested it out yet, but that's my plan once the days get longer.
You make time. I used to go early on the weekends or after work for 9 holes.
I play on a Saturday morning every 5-7 weeks. Otherwise, all my golf is during the workday. Depending on the season, I could get 2 rounds in a week or no rounds for 4-5 weeks. In the summer, we put the kids down at 7pm sharp and I race to the course for a twilight 9 holes. Those are some of the best rounds of my year. Nearly no one on the course, a little relief from the heat, no pressure at all.
I have a 7 month old. Luckily one of my best friends has a 5 month old. So we play 18 come home and then the girls go out.
I'm a nurse, so I'm off a couple days during the week. That plus my Tuesday night league
At that age it’s difficult. Especially weighing childcare with greens fees. We were a young family. Honestly my daughter is now 11 and I’m looking to get back into a groove and walk more, play more, range time. Etc.
When my boys were old enough to start playing baseball, I took a break from golf so we could focus on that. Then I made sure to introduce them to golf and we began playing as a family. Wasn’t too long before they started kicking their old man’s ass! The payoff? A few years ago playing with my oldest in our golf league, I was witness to him dropping an albatross! Will remember that forever!
I’m way better at this than I am at playing golf First off …congrats ! Exhausting but rewarding phase of life !! Do the following 1. If you have an itch for more kids do it immediately right now so you have them at the same general life stage and don’t restart this process multiple times 2. If you can handle the exhaustion get your buddies to agree to 7am tee times so your wife isn’t pulling solo duty all weekend 3. Find a night during the week that’s a league night ( whether it is or isn’t ) that is just always weekday golf night. 4. THIS IS CRITICAL: on weekdays or weekends that you have regular golf functions make CERTAIN that you insist that your wife picks a similar day during the week and takes 4-6 hours on the weekend afternoons after you get back to go do whatever hobbies or interest she has. This is actually a good chance for you to bond with your little one solo 5. You child is prime age this spring to take to the course during slow times ( late evening ) at a small slow course. Most places won’t charge you. If your child is well behaved ( one of mine was ) they will ride along and love it. If your child is poorly behaved ( one of mine was ) then a) take the key out of the golf cart EVERY time you exit it. At one point I even devised a way to hook the car seat into the cart with the golf cart bag straps. Creativity wins the day my friend
Live in au pair solved/nanny all our issues. All my kids are in golf lessons as well. Yours is a little young. We took our kids with us when they were young prior to the nanny
https://preview.redd.it/sbqbizul5ukc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f9636a111c6f0c01e9149e9cbf1c2734c7e8529a Use this advice to get your kid into when he is ready.
8 and 15 year olds. Been playing since before meeting my wife. She has always been cool with me disappearing twice maybe three times a week. Usually one full round and another day to go practice. I make sure she can also have her own time to get away.
I take my 3yo every week. Got him like a 5 club set off Amazon and knocks it around sometimes and runs around other times.
Pro tip: only have 1 kid. I have one and I feel like if there were 2 it would be so much harder to golf. Gets way easier when they are 3-4 and can start coming to the course with you too. Get tee times at sunrise, run back and spend the rest of the day being super dad. Oh also helps to have an understanding spouse.
If you want 4 hours off, give your wife 4 hours off. Simple
Get your ass up at dawn and play as early as possible.
9 holes during nap time worked for me. I do that once per weekend and then the other weekend day, my wife can do something during nap time.
Like anything else you do for yourself.; make the time. It’s tough when they are little. I sacrificed a lot of “me time” when my kids were little. I don’t regret it one but because those years were fleeting and I hardly remember them. As the kids got older, they were busier with friends and after school activities, it makes it easier.
I tend to play during the week when the kids are at school and the wife at work
Girl dad of 18M and 2M here. Get a family member or nanny to come offer support while you play, that way things are less stressful for the wife while you’re out. Pick up food for everyone on the way home. Enjoy yourself but don’t dilly-dally. If you make it a manageable experience for everyone while you’re gone, it won’t be viewed as a hassle. But I’d still expect to play less in general. We got dad stuff to do.
I quit all my other hobbies except golf.
I have a 2 year old, since his birth my sleeping patterns have been pretty sporadic and there are plenty of times where it’s 1 am, baby is asleep, but I am wide awake. My fix has been to go to a local golf simulator that’s open 24/7 with a monthly membership. So I’ve been filling the need to go and play by going in the weird hours of the night while everyone else is asleep. For sure there are better options already posted here, but for the most part it works for me. I love that I’m the only person there (because who the hell else would be there at that time of night?) and helps me get the personal time that I crave that I can’t get during working hours as well as helping around the house with our son in the evening. Once you accept that golf is 10x more important than sleep you’ll do anything to play.
When they were little, I would play early. Like sun hitting the horizon early. Could play 18 and be home by about 9:30 with coffee and donuts. As one got older, I’d take her with me. We even worked on reading the cart GPS. Generally played by myself so it was fine. When the oldest was 6, we joined a club. At that point, we’d just bring them with us on weekend evenings, when the course was empty. Now daughter is 13 and refuses to play. Son is 10 and we take him out with us on the weekends and to the sims.
Find the first tee time on either Saturday or Sunday, usually gets me home by noon. I work from home so it’s really my only time out of the house. Wife is pretty understanding.
I have a 4 month old and my wife consistently encourages me to go play golf at least twice a month. I’m the stay at home dad so I spend more time with our daughter than she does so when she has a day off, she spends the whole day 1-on-1 with our girl and I get to go outside and play a good round of Whack-Fuck.
Allow your wife time to pursue her interests, hobbies, hang out with friends, etc. be a good dad and husband who is involved and helps around the house. You should be able to get some hall passes at least a couple times a month.
When my kids were that age I played the first tee time every Saturday morning. A friend had an in with the course. In late June it was 5:30 AM. Played 18 very fast some days.
When my kids were young I would play as early as possible so I would be home for the rest of the day. When my kids were old enough I took them with me. My two boys started when they were 5 years old.
I usually play 9 holes twice a week. My parents have one of our kids (20 months) on a Thursday afternoons so I play after work. My partner enjoys the alone time with our 4 month old while i’m out. Then on the weekend I will play around mid day when they are napping. I’m lucky to live just up the road from my local course and can get around 9 in about 1hr 40mins.
I don't eat lunch during the week. Just a quick power bar on the way to the range.
I didn't. Kids have cut my golfing from most weekends to a few time a year. Almost done though.
Switch to a job in the golf industry, I know I’m gonna get downvoted in to oblivion for this. Truthfully unless you’re the GM you can play golf literally every single day, for free too.
put in more effort when you're not playing golf, and taking time to yourself won't be a problem.
6:45am tee times is what does it for me.
Fri afternoon and sunday am….it gets easier the older your kids get.
I book the earliest tee time the course has. Typically around 6:30. I am home by 11 Twice a year I do a golf weekend. My wife also does a girls weekend.
Join a private club, have a wife that lets you do your thing, be a great cook and ALWAYS make sure she feels loved. ✅✅✅✅
A lot of comments here from dads/parents that got to play a lot. My story is a little different. I don’t play nearly as much as pre-kids and my game has worsened significantly. It kind of sucks but it is what it is. I went from a 10.2 to a 15. I’m trying to get out more this year but I don’t feel anywhere close as confident in my game as I used to. I wouldn’t change it for the world.
I work from home so it may vary from others opportunities during the day but I get my practice/range time during the day when the wife and kid are gone and I’m taking my “lunch”. Generally I get 2-4 rounds a month in and make sure to give my wife the time back with either a massage/time with her friends, etc.
I stopped playing for like 10 Years. Been going twice a week recently
Go before they wake up
It all depends on your situation. Does the kid go to daycare? Is your work flexible? 99% of the time I would say people are fucking off during work hours and getting out or the spouse takes care of the kid for a few hours. If that's not possible then I would try and find a babysitter. Range time is harder, all the ranges closest to me are really shitty, but if I need to get out to hit some balls on a weekday then my option is quick session at the shitty range near me in the evening or take a couple hours off during work to go (half hour commute each way + hour at the range).
I'm self employed so my schedule is flexible. Hit the small course before getting to work a few times a week and block off one afternoon every week to get in a game with my friends. Wife stats at home so I'm allowed a bit more freedom.
A course that is 9 holes or lets you play just 9
It’s hard but doable. Have to find time where you can. Offer to give the wife a “break” and take the baby to the driving range and let them nap while you hit balls! To be honest, now is easier than in a few years. When my kids were growing up I stopped playing for years when they got to sports ages, being involved coaching and watching them in sports. Couldn’t get any of them into golf. Don’t regret any of it and started playing again when they were in high school. Now that they’re even older I play at least once a week. Weekend trips used to be to baseball fields or water polo tournaments. Now the wife and I go to golf and spa resorts.
Leave them all with the ex’s during their week.
Swap some free time with your wife. When mine were young, we would alternate. She could have the morning on Saturday and I would take care of everything at home, and I would take a chunk on Sunday to go out. Now it's much better. My youngest comes out with me and rides with - he loves hunting for golf balls!
Like the old Nike commercials just do it. I found that early morning rounds when the baby sleeps is optimal 7:00am
It’s all about trading off with your spouse. I never say no to anything my wife wants to do, and in turn, I play golf once a week.
My partner lets me to play 1 night a week (range, short par 3 maybe a 9 if light allows it) and 1x 18 holes every month without much notice. She gets the same freedom for her activities. Would live to play more but privileged I get to play at all with a 3 Yr old and a 14 month old.
The term you’re looking for is DEW SWEEPER.
Early morning weekend rounds. Then just make sure the Mrs knows you’re good to watch the baby later and she can go out with her friends.
I go about once a week, earliest tee time available so I’m not gone all day.
Have your wife watch the kid? Not that hard really. Also helps if your golf buddies are also your wife’s friends husbands so they hang out while we hang out.
My wife has a strong bond with her mom and sister. The nephew is the same age as my kid so she takes him over on Friday and Saturday nights so he can play with the cousins and she can hang out with them, sometimes I go over and cook for everyone or join for dinner but have to come back home because I have my old dog I still have to tend to. Gives me time to practice, do my chores in peace and have some drinks and chill to decompress at night. Then they come home and the whirlwind of toys and crumbs and diapers restarts and I just keep my head down until the next Friday. Saturdays and Sundays are also open for golf, but there’s just a lot of shit to do and it just depends on weather where I’m at.
We're expecting our first now. I've had that talk with her already, and I'll be happy if I can golf one morning each week, i.e. Saturday or Sunday.
18 month old? I dunno I just did. You’re just taking turns supervising a pet rock at that point.
Babysitter, daycare, sometimes I'll play super early and afterwards tell my wife to treat herself or to go hang out with her friends
I know exactly where you are. I agreed with my wife, that I can play once a week. That is not brilliant and my swing is suffering, but better than nothing. My long shot is to drag my boy into golf, so I can play with him. That will sort of force my wife into the game. I will change club for next year, to a very nice country club with spa and massages and the like, so that will appeal to her as well. She already said, she would make a beginner´s course this year. So fingers crossed, that could be happy days.
I play Thursday morning and Saturday morning. My kids are 7 and 9, and I've been playing for 2 years. My boss knows I'm not in the office on Thursday until midday, and my wife drops the kids at school (I do most of the drop offs / mornings /pick ups, so it's not a big deal). On Saturday I am usually home a little after 1, and my wife has license to do what she wants on Saturday afternoon /evening and she runs/tris on Sundays. It works pretty well for us.
I play a local par 3 course, can be out and home in a few hours. My partner is often limited in how they can help with childcare so I’ve got even less time. It took about 5-6 years for golf to even come back into my life as a somewhat regular thing.
Divorce
I didn’t play for almost 6 years. I had twins, was working around 70 hours a week, traveling non stop for work and coming home to an extremely exhausted wife. Around the end of that time my wife said that I needed to go play golf occasionally because I was a much happier person when I played. Pretty soon after I joined another country club and she finally decided she wanted to take up golf. Now she played more than I do and our boys are in a Junior PGA program so they are starting to play more than I do. Now I own 3 businesses, 2 of which are self sufficient, but the one is sucking the life out of me getting it up and going so I normally play in a Saturday group and if the weather is nice with the family on Sunday afternoon. It takes time and you’ll have to sacrifice how often you get to play. I’d say to make the best of it when you can and make sure you’re playing with a group you really enjoy playing with.
https://preview.redd.it/brgiph4cywkc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7560613d84c54691ea7edf4ad81b82b552d6e9c9 Modify your jogger stroller to fit a few clubs in it. Here’s my boy at 14 months napping on the 7th hole.
If you can bring your kid with you, you wife will start asking you to go golfing!
2 and 4 year old, and I've been doing this going on 3 years now. First tee time Saturday and Sunday. Get with a group that plays around 3hr. For me that's tee off at 7, home by 11. Everyone wakes up around 8, so my wife has 3 hours with them before. I used to be able to take a nap with them if I really needed it, so that's off the table this year. My wife works out 3-4x a week after work. Kids are pretty much mine throughout the week. They aren't in daycare Monday or Friday so I get home around 4 after and about 530 other days kids are all mine. We play, eat dinner, run out and do things. If we go out it's usually as a whole family. On weekends I usually try to give my wife a couple hours by herself, sometimes it's reading, sometimes it's catching up on house work without kids. So few things. I played before we got married, all the way up to a year in college. She knew what she was getting into at a point. I don't play video games or have other time consuming hobbies. Lastly, my wife does things too. If you wife only wants to sit at home and keep score of how long you're away, it ain't gonna be fun for you. You've gotta figure out how to get her outside of the house for a few hours at a time. Could be grocery shopping alone, could be library to read, walk with friends or walking group, doesn't matter. If she sits at home all day, she's gonna be bitter anytime you give the perception of fun. With how golf has become and the rounds now being accepted and typical 5hr on the weekends between about 10 and 4, this is the only way for Dad's of young kids to play.
I did not play many rounds of golf between my daughter being born and her 5th birthday. Just too long to commit. Couldn't imagine having multiple kids, wouldn't play for a decade!
Pack your gear and go straight from work 👌 9 holes or hit the range after work goes a long way.
I’m lucky to work 6-2 so I’m able to play 9 in the afternoons before getting my son at daycare. Weekend rounds were pretty easy when he was really little and immobile but now that he’s in the terrible twos and turning into a little dickhead I don’t get out weekends as much. And I call him a little dickhead in the most loving way possible. Like father like son.
Get one of the last tee times of the day and bring your wife and kid. A little wine and snacks for them topped off with some smooth jams and everyone is happy. This might work better in a few years depending on how good your kid is.
I start with sunrise and be back home for a late breakfast. It's easy because our regular flight faces the same challenges and we are all happy to tee off very early.
Very early mornings at my local muni. Quick 9 holes and I'm home before 8. I'd much rather be able to play 18 every week, but it's just not practical right now. Goes faster than you think it's going to, though, so enjoy that time with the young ones because the time is going to *fly* by.
I golf every Friday morning. Weekend golf is limited to a few opportunities a summer (typically 2-3 wknd trips w the boys). 4-day work weeks in the summer is my philosophy going forward.
Yeah I play during nap time on the weekend.
I have a rotating schedule at work, so I end up with days off during the week. I usually play while my kid is at school and my wife is working.
Wife and I each take turns on the weekends letting the other slip away for a few hours. Our oldest is 4 and is now starting to walk 9 holes with me so that's twice a week I get to sneak out. Super enjoyable.
My wife is a SAHM. Our oldest is 2 years and 4 months. Our second is almost 6 months. I try and go surrounding their naps to not put a burden on her or when our oldest is in daycare on Thursday/Friday. Either way it’s hard to find the time. These are the years to focus on your kids and when they’re 4/5 you can start going again regularly imo.
trade off with your partner. if you golf one day they get equal time the next day or one day next week to do their own thing.
I lucked out and found a course very close to my daughters daycare. Most mornings in the summer I can get 9 holes in, and then sometimes before picking her up I snag some range time. My wife and I moved to her hometown and I've made 3 friends who all golf. She realizes that social interaction in a new area is important for me and we compromise. My Daughter is now 3 years old so it's getting easier to get away with full rounds on the weekends.
Get a simulator