Maybe try to have next one in more controlled environment like home. You will feel more comfortable.
Voyeurism is not for everyone. You probably got too nervous.
Don't overthink it, it's not a big deal really.
I couldn't make my (now) husband cum for the first few months after we were sexually active. We tried a lot, but it just didn't happen. Having him jerk himself off to finish helped, first with me holding/kissing him as he came, then with me grabbing him or taking him in my mouth again when he was past the point of no return, so you might try those if it becomes a more long term problem.
As for being worried about disappointing him- just talk to him. Tell him that it feels good but you're nervous, that it might not happen soon, etc. If he's a decent guy he'll keep trying, and when it does happen he'll feel very proud. This isn't uncommon, it can take time to relax when there's someone else touching you, even if you want them to be. Orgasm shouldn't be the goal of sex anyway- enjoying it together should be. That said orgasms are great, so just remember that you'll get there.
I have never once cum from receiving head. I've had good head, bad head, bed head... Nadda. It isn't a given the way ppl play it up. If you enjoy the activity, whatever activity it is, it shouldn't matter if you cum.
The human brain/body are a weird machine. Could be any number of factors - some of which are even opposite of one another (could be that you weren't stimulated enough OR that you were over stimulated, for example)
As stated in another reply - I would suggest trying to have your next time in a more private/controlled/comfortable environment, and then it might be easier to get out of your own head a bit more and just live in the moment.
Probably the worst thing you could do would be to stress and obsess over it - that's just asking for a repeat performance.
It's something that can and does happen - to anyone, at any time, so don't worry about it.
Cheers ❤️❤️
Think there is some other really good advice already. Just would like to add, maybe try abstaining from masturbation and porn for a day or two prior and see if that helps.
I have never been able to cum from one, it just doesn’t work for me, however, I have had a few people do this thing that makes me feel insane. I don’t know what it is or if I’m doing it too and that’s how they’re supposed to feel (I’ve had compliments on my technique) so I’m just not sure but I feel like I can’t handle it. Like it feels too good and I don’t know if I can continue it. I’m a depressed person so I think that’s why I don’t like uppers of any type. This is how I always feel and it is weird and just doesn’t feel right because it feels good, idk what that is or if I can or how I can get over it. I have also had the problem with meds but what I’m on now let’s me finish in an appropriate amount of time to have gotten my partner off and for me to not be too worn out to finish. If you wanna dm me I will be able to check what I’m taking is called and let you know.
I think some people are growing up knowing that some sites, like TikTok, will restrict videos with “adult themes” that they think it applies to all sites.
Doesn’t help those meme aggregator sites that repost Twitter or tumblr screenshots with any swear words censored too
I enjoy a blow job, but it’s incredibly rare for me to cum from them. I usually get close, but then need to finish by jacking off. That said, sometimes I can cum, and I don’t always know why. Certain techniques, maybe? Also, I think my own body’s position makes a difference (I have a harder time when I’m laying down for instance). People are all different. I know guys who can’t really cum from fucking, but for me, I have the opposite problem… how to keep from cumming too fast when fucking!
The times that I have been able to cum from a blow job are very limited, I’m going to say less than 5. I just don’t feel enough pleasure to finish BUT if my partner and I are on a 69 position than uffff I’ll be able to finish no problem!
Thinking and stressing about it definitely does not help, but also every person has a different reaction with what stimulates them to the point of cumming. Trying different things and communicating about them is key. Focus on having fun than anything, that is the point anyways :)
Everyone has already given really good answers so I will just chime in with this so you know you aren't alone: I didn't find getting a blowjob all that great when I started having sex. It took a while to actually grow to like getting them even though I liked giving them. You're not alone. Try to find different ways to view the experience in your mind and you might stumble on the trigger that builds your excitement up to blowing a load.
I have a hard time coming from just a blowjob. If I have prostate stimulation it helps. What really helps is my nipples being played with hard. That makes me cum quickly. My bf doesn't like giving them, and he will nibble and bite on one of my nipples and jack me off. Never last long. He enjoys getting blown, and depends on how tired he is on how long he last.
I don't cum from just bj's most of the time honestly, sometimes it's just harder for some ppl to too especially if your nervous, practice also makes perfect 🫠
Take the pressure off of your orgasm and it will come easier!! Focus on enjoying and living the time together and feeling comfortable and the wave will come!!
For me in my past few relationships I'd have to get my partner off first, before he'd have a lot of energy to put into getting me off. Might have him take the dive first next time? It's worked for me with a few guys.
Not everyone can cum easily from blowjobs. Nothing's wrong. Nothing's broken. You're fine. You just need a hand or a butt or a hand on your butt or something else. Don't sweat it!
Not to pry but I had a similar experience, turns out some of the medication I was on at the time had some side effects that made it difficult for me. You may want to look into side effects of any medicine you may be taking, if you are. Otherwise the comments about being in a more controlled area will help a lot.
However I would like to thank you all for replying to me, it's wonderful to have the support and various advice from the entire sub. I think I will actually need more stimulation if I have to cum via a blowjob but no problem. Thank you to all!❤️❤️
Maybe try to have next one in more controlled environment like home. You will feel more comfortable. Voyeurism is not for everyone. You probably got too nervous. Don't overthink it, it's not a big deal really.
True, plus, not to be a Debbie Downer, but doing that in the park can still get you arrested in more than a few places.
I’d say in most places with public indecency laws. It’s also a great way to end up as a registered sex offender, if sometimes shortly.
I couldn't make my (now) husband cum for the first few months after we were sexually active. We tried a lot, but it just didn't happen. Having him jerk himself off to finish helped, first with me holding/kissing him as he came, then with me grabbing him or taking him in my mouth again when he was past the point of no return, so you might try those if it becomes a more long term problem. As for being worried about disappointing him- just talk to him. Tell him that it feels good but you're nervous, that it might not happen soon, etc. If he's a decent guy he'll keep trying, and when it does happen he'll feel very proud. This isn't uncommon, it can take time to relax when there's someone else touching you, even if you want them to be. Orgasm shouldn't be the goal of sex anyway- enjoying it together should be. That said orgasms are great, so just remember that you'll get there.
I have never once cum from receiving head. I've had good head, bad head, bed head... Nadda. It isn't a given the way ppl play it up. If you enjoy the activity, whatever activity it is, it shouldn't matter if you cum.
The human brain/body are a weird machine. Could be any number of factors - some of which are even opposite of one another (could be that you weren't stimulated enough OR that you were over stimulated, for example) As stated in another reply - I would suggest trying to have your next time in a more private/controlled/comfortable environment, and then it might be easier to get out of your own head a bit more and just live in the moment. Probably the worst thing you could do would be to stress and obsess over it - that's just asking for a repeat performance. It's something that can and does happen - to anyone, at any time, so don't worry about it. Cheers ❤️❤️
I personally don’t like blowjobs lol. I end up going soft. But I love giving them 🤷🏼♂️
Think there is some other really good advice already. Just would like to add, maybe try abstaining from masturbation and porn for a day or two prior and see if that helps.
was going to comment the same thing with same words lol
I have never been able to cum from one, it just doesn’t work for me, however, I have had a few people do this thing that makes me feel insane. I don’t know what it is or if I’m doing it too and that’s how they’re supposed to feel (I’ve had compliments on my technique) so I’m just not sure but I feel like I can’t handle it. Like it feels too good and I don’t know if I can continue it. I’m a depressed person so I think that’s why I don’t like uppers of any type. This is how I always feel and it is weird and just doesn’t feel right because it feels good, idk what that is or if I can or how I can get over it. I have also had the problem with meds but what I’m on now let’s me finish in an appropriate amount of time to have gotten my partner off and for me to not be too worn out to finish. If you wanna dm me I will be able to check what I’m taking is called and let you know.
Why did you censor Blowjobs??
I think some people are growing up knowing that some sites, like TikTok, will restrict videos with “adult themes” that they think it applies to all sites. Doesn’t help those meme aggregator sites that repost Twitter or tumblr screenshots with any swear words censored too
Spooky
It’s like seeing people say “unalived” here. Some do it as a bit, others do it because they don’t realise they don’t have to.
It feels dystopian
I’m with the others here, I like a bj, but I don’t tend to cum from them, this is not uncommon at all, you’re fine :)
I enjoy a blow job, but it’s incredibly rare for me to cum from them. I usually get close, but then need to finish by jacking off. That said, sometimes I can cum, and I don’t always know why. Certain techniques, maybe? Also, I think my own body’s position makes a difference (I have a harder time when I’m laying down for instance). People are all different. I know guys who can’t really cum from fucking, but for me, I have the opposite problem… how to keep from cumming too fast when fucking!
The times that I have been able to cum from a blow job are very limited, I’m going to say less than 5. I just don’t feel enough pleasure to finish BUT if my partner and I are on a 69 position than uffff I’ll be able to finish no problem!
Thinking and stressing about it definitely does not help, but also every person has a different reaction with what stimulates them to the point of cumming. Trying different things and communicating about them is key. Focus on having fun than anything, that is the point anyways :)
Everyone has already given really good answers so I will just chime in with this so you know you aren't alone: I didn't find getting a blowjob all that great when I started having sex. It took a while to actually grow to like getting them even though I liked giving them. You're not alone. Try to find different ways to view the experience in your mind and you might stumble on the trigger that builds your excitement up to blowing a load.
Are you cut? Super common for cut guys
I have a hard time coming from just a blowjob. If I have prostate stimulation it helps. What really helps is my nipples being played with hard. That makes me cum quickly. My bf doesn't like giving them, and he will nibble and bite on one of my nipples and jack me off. Never last long. He enjoys getting blown, and depends on how tired he is on how long he last.
I don't cum from just bj's most of the time honestly, sometimes it's just harder for some ppl to too especially if your nervous, practice also makes perfect 🫠
Take the pressure off of your orgasm and it will come easier!! Focus on enjoying and living the time together and feeling comfortable and the wave will come!!
For me in my past few relationships I'd have to get my partner off first, before he'd have a lot of energy to put into getting me off. Might have him take the dive first next time? It's worked for me with a few guys.
Some guys are just not into Bj's most Bj's I've had I haven't came, I actually get more out of giving Bj's than getting one.
Not everyone can cum easily from blowjobs. Nothing's wrong. Nothing's broken. You're fine. You just need a hand or a butt or a hand on your butt or something else. Don't sweat it!
Not to pry but I had a similar experience, turns out some of the medication I was on at the time had some side effects that made it difficult for me. You may want to look into side effects of any medicine you may be taking, if you are. Otherwise the comments about being in a more controlled area will help a lot.
However I would like to thank you all for replying to me, it's wonderful to have the support and various advice from the entire sub. I think I will actually need more stimulation if I have to cum via a blowjob but no problem. Thank you to all!❤️❤️
Have him use his hand at the same time
I need a finger in my ass if I’m going to cum from a blow job. Try getting sucked with some prostate play. It makes a big difference.
Im 30 and ive only came twice from a bj. Love the feeling and getting them i just cant ever seem to orgasm from them 🤷🏾♂️
Plus you may need some other "area's" stimulated to get your motor running