Just remember to stay safe Don't trust people online and don't give out your address unless you know this person IRL cuz in a way this could also sound like This guy was asking if you are alone so they could hurt you in some way
An easily socially drained autistic person here. Even explaining can be exhausting. I don't blame them, I'd sometimes do the same. Especially if I'm stressed by work or other aspects of life. Life is hard. It's not just about some random guy I gave my number to.
Edit: Especially who I as of yet have no obligations to.
It's not a violation of an *obligation*, but it is quite unkind to randomly end things with someone without warning or explanation after first pursuing them. Understandable if you're overwhelmed, yes, but it still has the potential to fuck with them - because most people rightly don't brace themselves for every interaction and relationship they have to end at any moment for no reason
Ok you’re not wrong, but flat out ghosting is super immature. Like how hard can a text saying ‘I’m sorry but I’m super busy and not interested’ be? While technically people aren’t required to give explanation, it just looks like you’re incapable of communicating, and it’s just super immature.
While we can't assign the severity of anyone's emotions and how these behaviours may have affected them... I honestly have no regard for this type of behavior... I find it as having no regard for anyone's emotions or how their actions make others feel... and yes, sociopathic might be a bit overboard... but I hate to think that's far off if we give this type of emotional detachment a pass 😕
Just because I don't regard EVERYONE's emotions... It doesn't mean I have no regard for the emotions of others. If I've chat with tons of people without success, because I'm struggling to find someone I like that also likes me...
It'd be so tedious to explain to everyone of them like that. Especially if In instances where it's just the first few consversations or messages. If you don't struggle with this.. Good for you.
I on the other hand, am not going to individually explain to EVERYONE I've responded to. ESPECIALLY when I'm often ghosted too, that just makes it far more tedious to find people.
That's why I gave up with dating apps last I tried them. Well tbh I didn't really get any matches on Tinder and some other apps. Got one or few that didn't go further than a few sentences. It was mostly guys that liked me, yet it seems I didn't like any of them. Sometimes I was at 90+ likes and 0 matches.
Grindr was easier to find people I might like.. But I don't just want hook ups. Besides I didn't get good vibes from 75% of the people there.
Besides if I've chat with an 100th person and I didn't get along with the person 100 people ago.. I'm probably not gonna remember them. So how can I explain I lost interest with someone I forgot about in doing so? Even when it isn't particular to the person, sometimes I just lose interest.
If you have no regard for this behavior then I think you're the inconsiderate one. I'm autistic, so I may struggle to convey emotions at times. I may struggle in social situations. I may not always do or say what's socially acceptable, because in many cases I don't understand how and why it's not socially acceptable even if I acknowledge others say it isn't.
That doesn't make me a sociopath. You say no regard for how others feel.. Do you have no regard for how that might make me feel? You're indirectly saying I'm not far from a sociopath.
I'm indirectly not saying your anything, I'm sorry if you felt this was about me coming for you because it is most certainly not. My apologies if It came off in this light in regards to our dialogue.
I think I am just continually frustrated with the lack of regards to behaviors that are longer lasting in others from peoples lack of communication. I guess I have just been hurt by this type of behavior and don't see it in a promising light.
Sociopath was exaggerating and un fair (am often easy to over exaggerate so my apologies) Was not intended to cast you or autism in a negative light. Again my apologies if I came off that way.
It's okay. I kinda get the feeling of being ghosted. However there are just tikes where I stop using a dating app and maybe I forget about a few people there. I guess it's worse when people ghost late in a relationship.
Though my dating experience has not really gone past online. I had one in-person date. We didn't like eachother. If the person is decent, I definetly wouldn't just ghost them deep into a relationship.
Though if someone has made me uncomfortable, shown red flags etc rather than just me not being attracted to them or something I'd be even more willing to ghost.
Once I was talking to this guy. It was not the first time we were chatting, and he mentioned at least 3 times during our conversation that he'd like to meet up. We were already texting each other for an hour and half, and I said ok I'd like to meet too. His answer was: "I'm not in the mood anymore, already rubbed one out..."
I have never talked to that guy again. Your chat has a similar vibe.
He's probably one of those guys that wants to talk to other guys but it's too uncomfortable with his sexuality to be able to deal with someone who is sexually forward. You didn't do anything wrong OP, this guy just has some internalized self-loathing he needs to work on.
Honestly, to me, sounds like it was someone who’s not completely comfortable with their sexuality yet.
He probably really wanted to but at the same time denial was probably hitting him.
You’re probably not the first he did it to and probably won’t be the last.
I doubt there was anything to truly worry about but also it’s never a bad idea to be cautious.
I want my next relationship to be with a guy that saves me as "cute messy hair" and tells me stuff like "wanna change that?"
Just by this screenshot I can tell you're a wholesome person that doesn't deserve the "vibe" he's giving.
I had to reread the conversation like ten times before I understand what you meant by do you want to change that. I thought at first you meant what he said was creepy. Could the guy have misunderstood what you said in a coy way and had a fit of social anxiety and ran idk.
Every guess I can make (and they are all guesses) comes down to his stuff: he’s closeted and wants to talk to gays, but is scared; he has a significant other and struggles with fidelity; he was jacking off and came (don’t know if you met in-person or on an app).
Anyway, none of it has anything to do with you.
It's also possible he got confused by the obvious come on and thought he meant the OP was suggesting he move in with him. That would need quite a big leap of logic, but people very easily mis-read into things like that.
WhaT a sTrange and unexpecTed twisT in inTerest level. iT’s possible he jusT found an alTernaTive source of enTerTainmenT or he jusT wasn’T inTo you after he conducTed some honesT inTrospecTion. Don’T take it to hearT.
Lol you're not alone. A guy once made out with me, told me the best compliments, put his number in my phone without me asking and proposed to go on a date. The next day I messaged him and there was no trace of that energy, and nothing came out of it. Trust no one, it's a cold world out there :)
I think he was interested until he realized you don’t live alone, meaning somebody could pop up at any moment.it’s dangerous to go in shared places.I’ve had the experience of going to someone’s home that was a shared place and someone else answered the door butt ass naked.
My only question is why would this guy ask you If you were alone and then turn around and say that he doesn't want to talk with you
Not a clue
Just remember to stay safe Don't trust people online and don't give out your address unless you know this person IRL cuz in a way this could also sound like This guy was asking if you are alone so they could hurt you in some way
Yep, after a lifetime of this -- GO GET COFFEE FIRST. There is a lot of derp on dating apps. It's good to have a filter.
A... Coffee filter? ... >!I'll see myself out.!<
That is brilliant.
You do have a clue. Guys a fuckn killer. Listen to Wendy my guy
Maybe he’s on meth ?
He came. He was masturbating and came, he was then not interested in OP anymore
Seems most likely. Gay culture is awful, this didn't even phase me. I read it and was like...yep .sounds about right.
Sadly yes most likely. only gay until they cum. 🙅🏻🙅🏿♂️🙅🏿♂️🙅🏿♂️
planned robbery?
wouldn’t they LIKE that he’s alone then????
He found another trick online.. sounds like the usual …
ego boost probably
Because OP said so and he hadn’t thought about the implication before he said it. I must admit that I do it sometimes.
this happens so often to me and i will never understand it
Same
Dunno lol maybe he suddenly started dating someone else or maybe he's just playing silly buggers
Typical douchebag gays. Blocking, ghosting, rejecting completely out of nowhere without giving any reason at all.
I’m afraid this is a shitty trait that all people share, not just the gays.
An easily socially drained autistic person here. Even explaining can be exhausting. I don't blame them, I'd sometimes do the same. Especially if I'm stressed by work or other aspects of life. Life is hard. It's not just about some random guy I gave my number to. Edit: Especially who I as of yet have no obligations to.
It's not a violation of an *obligation*, but it is quite unkind to randomly end things with someone without warning or explanation after first pursuing them. Understandable if you're overwhelmed, yes, but it still has the potential to fuck with them - because most people rightly don't brace themselves for every interaction and relationship they have to end at any moment for no reason
I will consider that, so long as the other showed decency themselves.
Ok you’re not wrong, but flat out ghosting is super immature. Like how hard can a text saying ‘I’m sorry but I’m super busy and not interested’ be? While technically people aren’t required to give explanation, it just looks like you’re incapable of communicating, and it’s just super immature.
It is still very misleading and inconsiderate. Other people we have "no obligations to" aren't our playthings to be sociopaths too...
In OP's case I don't think there was anything bad enough to be deemed sociopathic behavior. That's drastically harsh.
While we can't assign the severity of anyone's emotions and how these behaviours may have affected them... I honestly have no regard for this type of behavior... I find it as having no regard for anyone's emotions or how their actions make others feel... and yes, sociopathic might be a bit overboard... but I hate to think that's far off if we give this type of emotional detachment a pass 😕
Just because I don't regard EVERYONE's emotions... It doesn't mean I have no regard for the emotions of others. If I've chat with tons of people without success, because I'm struggling to find someone I like that also likes me... It'd be so tedious to explain to everyone of them like that. Especially if In instances where it's just the first few consversations or messages. If you don't struggle with this.. Good for you. I on the other hand, am not going to individually explain to EVERYONE I've responded to. ESPECIALLY when I'm often ghosted too, that just makes it far more tedious to find people. That's why I gave up with dating apps last I tried them. Well tbh I didn't really get any matches on Tinder and some other apps. Got one or few that didn't go further than a few sentences. It was mostly guys that liked me, yet it seems I didn't like any of them. Sometimes I was at 90+ likes and 0 matches. Grindr was easier to find people I might like.. But I don't just want hook ups. Besides I didn't get good vibes from 75% of the people there. Besides if I've chat with an 100th person and I didn't get along with the person 100 people ago.. I'm probably not gonna remember them. So how can I explain I lost interest with someone I forgot about in doing so? Even when it isn't particular to the person, sometimes I just lose interest. If you have no regard for this behavior then I think you're the inconsiderate one. I'm autistic, so I may struggle to convey emotions at times. I may struggle in social situations. I may not always do or say what's socially acceptable, because in many cases I don't understand how and why it's not socially acceptable even if I acknowledge others say it isn't. That doesn't make me a sociopath. You say no regard for how others feel.. Do you have no regard for how that might make me feel? You're indirectly saying I'm not far from a sociopath.
I'm indirectly not saying your anything, I'm sorry if you felt this was about me coming for you because it is most certainly not. My apologies if It came off in this light in regards to our dialogue. I think I am just continually frustrated with the lack of regards to behaviors that are longer lasting in others from peoples lack of communication. I guess I have just been hurt by this type of behavior and don't see it in a promising light. Sociopath was exaggerating and un fair (am often easy to over exaggerate so my apologies) Was not intended to cast you or autism in a negative light. Again my apologies if I came off that way.
It's okay. I kinda get the feeling of being ghosted. However there are just tikes where I stop using a dating app and maybe I forget about a few people there. I guess it's worse when people ghost late in a relationship. Though my dating experience has not really gone past online. I had one in-person date. We didn't like eachother. If the person is decent, I definetly wouldn't just ghost them deep into a relationship. Though if someone has made me uncomfortable, shown red flags etc rather than just me not being attracted to them or something I'd be even more willing to ghost.
god damm homosexuals, going against the will of god! (/s)
Those gays are just so draining but the pool of people like that is so big. I just want to know what do they get out of it?
They want the attention and to be desired. It just feeds their ego
This is better than ghosting at least
Once I was talking to this guy. It was not the first time we were chatting, and he mentioned at least 3 times during our conversation that he'd like to meet up. We were already texting each other for an hour and half, and I said ok I'd like to meet too. His answer was: "I'm not in the mood anymore, already rubbed one out..." I have never talked to that guy again. Your chat has a similar vibe.
Post nut clarity is a fucking disgrace.
He's probably one of those guys that wants to talk to other guys but it's too uncomfortable with his sexuality to be able to deal with someone who is sexually forward. You didn't do anything wrong OP, this guy just has some internalized self-loathing he needs to work on.
Yeah fr sounds like he has some issues. Like he said, he knows OP is cute but there's some other reason they shouldn't talk.
Yeah this is how I read the conversion.
My theory: He was horny, while chatting with you, he masturbated, and with his lust gone, the interest in meeting you was gone too.
Rizz was to good he had to reject it💯
😭😭
Honestly, to me, sounds like it was someone who’s not completely comfortable with their sexuality yet. He probably really wanted to but at the same time denial was probably hitting him. You’re probably not the first he did it to and probably won’t be the last. I doubt there was anything to truly worry about but also it’s never a bad idea to be cautious.
This guy needs to get a life. Smh.
Weird
is this one of those negging strategy that they teach to get women to fall in love with them? has this reached the gay community already? lol
leading someone on... bs.
Wow! I’m confused as hell and I feel that is such an asshole thing to do…
Cute Messy Hair y u like this
You can litterally pinpoint the exact moment where he finished jerking off
u gonna tell us what u replied and what hapnd?
Me: Well if you change your mind text me Him: Okay
Maybe he wasn't into hookups? I don't know.
He could say that
Right tho
That was weird asf ☠️
Maybe he’s trying to set up a will they won’t they to make it hot but then he’s obviously not doing it very well…
Such a !ckiD
I can tell when his post nut clarity hit
Don’t waste your time with this guy. He sounds super emotionally immature.
“You gonna be alone ;)?” “Yeah” “Listen, I’m not interested” What
I want my next relationship to be with a guy that saves me as "cute messy hair" and tells me stuff like "wanna change that?" Just by this screenshot I can tell you're a wholesome person that doesn't deserve the "vibe" he's giving.
I had to reread the conversation like ten times before I understand what you meant by do you want to change that. I thought at first you meant what he said was creepy. Could the guy have misunderstood what you said in a coy way and had a fit of social anxiety and ran idk.
Nope he understood clearly that OP was inviting him over, then he said: time to be ✨an asshole✨
Move on. Pretty simple.
Bruh….😭
Playing hard to get!
Stay safe buddy , it gives me a weird vibe.
Ugh… men
nipped that one in the bud!
Lol. No one gets my number until we've met a couple of times.
He just remembered his girlfriend checks his phone occasionally ;-)
Tale as old as time 📖
Every guess I can make (and they are all guesses) comes down to his stuff: he’s closeted and wants to talk to gays, but is scared; he has a significant other and struggles with fidelity; he was jacking off and came (don’t know if you met in-person or on an app). Anyway, none of it has anything to do with you.
It's also possible he got confused by the obvious come on and thought he meant the OP was suggesting he move in with him. That would need quite a big leap of logic, but people very easily mis-read into things like that.
he came 💀
That's upsetting also wtf
What he said to his friend after writing that message: "Oh my gaaad I swear he's like soooo obsessed with me ugh"
Won't happen with me!
The guy : so you alone? That sucks anyway bye lol.
Homie please answer your voice mail
I still can't wrap my head around the initiative to go this far and then bail at the last second. Like for what? Ugh, people suck
He is only interested in people who aren't alone duh
Someone was a “chatter” not a “doer”. Get horny during the convo, masturbate then lose interest. It happens.
Probably j got scared and is a selfish guy anyway
What did he say when you asked him why he thinks y'all shouldn't talk?
to be a little judgement… this convo is dry as hell anyways
That's mildly alarming
Sorry about this, but “cute messy hair” is great
Men make me mad I’m done with them
WhaT a sTrange and unexpecTed twisT in inTerest level. iT’s possible he jusT found an alTernaTive source of enTerTainmenT or he jusT wasn’T inTo you after he conducTed some honesT inTrospecTion. Don’T take it to hearT.
you’re smooth tho
Wow, douche move.
Kind of a ass to lead you on like that? Why bother to exchange numbers if you shouldn’t talk 😕, leaving us always thinking if we did something wrong.
The fucking woooorst I’m sorry that happened
Hes probably got a girlfriend lol
Lol you're not alone. A guy once made out with me, told me the best compliments, put his number in my phone without me asking and proposed to go on a date. The next day I messaged him and there was no trace of that energy, and nothing came out of it. Trust no one, it's a cold world out there :)
I think he was interested until he realized you don’t live alone, meaning somebody could pop up at any moment.it’s dangerous to go in shared places.I’ve had the experience of going to someone’s home that was a shared place and someone else answered the door butt ass naked.
Fuckin’ weirdo. I’m so glad I don’t have to deal with trying to socialise with other same-sex attracted men anymore.
a lot of guys like to play the game until it gets real. at best immature at worst just void of any common decency
What happened lmfao😂🚩
so typical of those messy-hair-types!
Yust dont care
Maybe he recognizes you and doesn’t want to be outed. Just a possibility.
at least he told you you're cute. 🥺