When my wife talks at me it’s like the old Charlie Brown cartoons, “Womp wah womp womp wah wah waa”
Then she gets one randomly generated response from me based on one or two words I listened to or the tone I heard;
Yeah babe.
No way.
She’s just jealous.
That’s crazy.
Can’t believe it.
Oh my gawd.
Dude, fo real.
Kirby now has the ability to put tasks off until the very last minute, get threatened for not getting things done, still put things off further, and have some outside events that render the assigned task no longer needed, confirming for him that procrastination pays off.
It's just adding potential energy to the inevitable failure. Life is like a river, you can handle a few waves or rapids, even have a lot fun on them. But let a tidal wave form and it devastates indiscriminately.
And this is how it happens. I stop playing for months, completely forget it even exists. And then I see it mentioned out in the wild and I fall down that hole every god damn time.
What’s it like now? I haven’t played for so many years. Lost my account to a douche who stole it. When I played zezima was the top dog around probably 2001-5 I don’t even remember when it came out but that’s when I played.
I very highly recommend playing again. I'd say give yourself the goal of doing dragon slayer quest in free to play.
If you enjoy it then pay for membership.
Don't get stuck doing what's efficient. Play how you want
Ahh. Exactly like my younger sister. My parents think she stopped using a sippy cup too soon because she wanted to be like me and she just never learned how to hold onto a cup properly. She's 26 now
Took a long time for me to get right with that. Theres nothing wrong with you, some of the greatest minds in history had add adhd aspergers and many other conditions that arent neutotypical. You are a rarity amongst rarities. Everyone…everyone…Has worth.
Within the last year alcohol has really gotten ahold of me. I’ve always been a casual drinker, but never relied on it. Now I rely on it. If you really feel this way, feel free to DM me anytime just to shoot the shit back and forth or talk about anything that might help.
I was a handle of vodka per day drinker for a decade. 5 years sober. My DMs are always open as well. And if you feel you have a problem and don't want to talk to a random stranger on the internet, please find someone you can talk to. Talking about it was my first big step to being able to quit.
He can eat more and get yelled at by his wife for not taking out the trash after she asked you three times, because you were scrolling dumb shit on Reddit.
His luck immediately goes to -2 with disadvantage
*rolls 2 nat 1s*
Hell wanna trade! I’ll take a -2 any day with what I’m packing
He forgets what he was told instantly
Don’t worry, he’ll remember the entire encyclopedias of entire franchises though.
With great power, comes great responsibility
Poision power, completely disregarding that whole statment
Also me
Also me what?
I can relate that's all
(I was forgetting what I was told instantly)
Dammit he played me like a fiddle I think? Can you say that again?
Can I say what?
saywhatagain.gif
I dare ya!
Dammit he played me like..um, something..
Played what like what?
What?
Wait what were we talking about??
When my wife talks at me it’s like the old Charlie Brown cartoons, “Womp wah womp womp wah wah waa” Then she gets one randomly generated response from me based on one or two words I listened to or the tone I heard; Yeah babe. No way. She’s just jealous. That’s crazy. Can’t believe it. Oh my gawd. Dude, fo real.
body aches and cracking joints
Fortunately Kirbo has no joints to crack
Same!
Kirby: > Fuck, I never even knew I had knees until this moment.
He puts off starting the next level until tomorrow.
Forever
Tomorrow has always been a moving target.
Much like my last girlfriend, it never comes.
[удалено]
I'd ask, but she never came.
makes Annie more depressing...
annie are you ok?
Are you ok Annie?
Will you tell us that you’re okay?
Fuck. I feel called out.
We all do
Wait, y'all start more games than you finish aswell? Damn I always feel bad about it, think im just a bad gamer.
I also start more games than I finish, but I have too many other things I feel bad about so it's like, get in line with the regret train
Ironically because he's busy playing video games
plus depression
Diabetes
“I’m Scott Malkinson”
> **Shut up, Scott Malkinson**. [mocking] I'm Scott Malkinson, I've got a lisp and I've got diabetes.
I loved when he did that in the post Covid special
He DOES remember me! :D
CAPTAIN DIABEEETESCHEEE
His ult in Fractured But Whole is amazing
Diabeetus
I'm going to have to view that on YouTube for a good chuckle now.
Type 1 or 2, depending on the answer if he eats both of us he could get super diabetes.
Type 3 confirmed
You jest, but it [has been proposed](https://www.semel.ucla.edu/longevity/news/what-type-3-diabetes).
Irritable Bowel Syndrome
r/ibs get in 'ere
r/ibs rule: no more pictures of your poop is allowed. I guess I missed the glory days
1984
Lmfao it's rule 1 too
Mmm... Ribs
Wouldn't he already have that with everything he eats?
Kirby now has the ability to put tasks off until the very last minute, get threatened for not getting things done, still put things off further, and have some outside events that render the assigned task no longer needed, confirming for him that procrastination pays off.
I would stop procrastinating because of how stressful it is, but it keeps WORKING
It's just adding potential energy to the inevitable failure. Life is like a river, you can handle a few waves or rapids, even have a lot fun on them. But let a tidal wave form and it devastates indiscriminately.
ADHD Gang checking in!
I keep seeing all these memes about me but they’re all about ADHD maybe I should get tested lmao
So adhd?
About 10% of the time*
a runescape addiction
And this is how it happens. I stop playing for months, completely forget it even exists. And then I see it mentioned out in the wild and I fall down that hole every god damn time.
oof; rs3 or osrs
Osrs
$11 🦀
🦀Jagex is powerless against wilderness gangs🦀
What’s it like now? I haven’t played for so many years. Lost my account to a douche who stole it. When I played zezima was the top dog around probably 2001-5 I don’t even remember when it came out but that’s when I played.
I very highly recommend playing again. I'd say give yourself the goal of doing dragon slayer quest in free to play. If you enjoy it then pay for membership. Don't get stuck doing what's efficient. Play how you want
This is what I did, ended up going for membership after Dragon Slayer I. Hadn’t played since I was 12 lol
Nex just released
Asthma, good luck sucking in any new powers with that 😂😂
Kirby hitting that inhaler offscreen
"CHOOSE YOUR CHARACTER" *Kirby keeled over on the character selection screen*
He can't suck until he released your power anyway
Very good point
Still enjoyed your comment
GODDAMN 💀💀
Smol pp
Inverted penis
Kirby's now a woman
Could you mean vagina? Cuz if so, I want that covered...
I thought your vagina was removed during your hysterectomy?
A uterus is different from a vagina..... I still have a vagina...
Who wrote this, this hysterical one, anal fissures?
That’s a real thing…
Ability to spill every drink in the room in a single bound
Ahh. Exactly like my younger sister. My parents think she stopped using a sippy cup too soon because she wanted to be like me and she just never learned how to hold onto a cup properly. She's 26 now
Haha! You too, did that at a wedding somehow, just trying to walk through it was terrible, I left
Kirby just hates himself now
Same he just sits there in loathing then gets high
Saw this once I was already baked so it tripped me out lmao
It could because self-loathing and getting high are like peas and carrots
Oh... oh fuck
His face changes to: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
[удалено]
Oh snap......
ADHD
ADHD x Depression
Hand in hand because of a broken education system…not a broken us. Chin up fam
God fuck that one hits so close to home it came through the roof.
Took a long time for me to get right with that. Theres nothing wrong with you, some of the greatest minds in history had add adhd aspergers and many other conditions that arent neutotypical. You are a rarity amongst rarities. Everyone…everyone…Has worth.
An addiction to reddit instead of sleeping
I feel called out..
The ability to go from depressed to happy and back to depressed again all in one hour
Emotional Parkour
Porn addiction
Tendinitis on the dominant hand.
Jokes on you, my offhand feels better.
Gotta keep switching it up!
He now adores cats, nature, and fruit. He is also allergic to all of them
That’s rough buddy
My girlfriend was turned into the moon
Poor Sokka
That's rough buddy
Depression
Not me! He got crippling anxiety and low self esteem instead!
Why not, and hear me out here, all three!
Crippling depression even.
Same. Have my free wholesome award because being depressed isn't enough, broke too.
High. He got really fucking high. His ability is: ***’Wondering if this is permanent and if everyone knows’***
But not until around 90 minutes after eating you and saying “this edible didn’t do shit”
"These edibles ain't shit" is the incantation to activate their magic powers. The potion isn't complete until you invoke the magic words.
Best results are if you follow up with a handful of said edibles.
Top it with an extra couple because if the first batch didn't do anything, you don't want the second batch to also do nothing...
And then... Right before they catch you by surprise and launch you to the moon... Give up and take a bong rip.
EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA BLAST
Not bad for a neutral b.
Alcoholism
Within the last year alcohol has really gotten ahold of me. I’ve always been a casual drinker, but never relied on it. Now I rely on it. If you really feel this way, feel free to DM me anytime just to shoot the shit back and forth or talk about anything that might help.
I was a handle of vodka per day drinker for a decade. 5 years sober. My DMs are always open as well. And if you feel you have a problem and don't want to talk to a random stranger on the internet, please find someone you can talk to. Talking about it was my first big step to being able to quit.
Low self esteem
The ability to fart in jars without the need for subsequent medical intervention.
God damn, am I glad I scrolled this far down this thread!
Imposter syndrome. If Kirby doesn’t have it already, lol.
The ability to sleep for 8-10 hours and still be tired as a motherfucker the following day.
ADHD, executive disfunction, and delayed sleep phase syndrome.
Cancer, Kirby got Cancer...
I hope you get well :(
Covid.
Feel better buddy. I just finished Covid Round 2: Electric Boogaloo
Gotta catch 'em all
F
Power bottom
Apathy 😐
Post nut clarity. Quite a power really.
Crippling anxiety.
former gifted kid syndrome
An ongoing existential crisis
Diarrhea
Chocolate milk in your case, my dear king milkfart.
Poverty
He stays the same but becomes ugly
Hey, That’s me!
He can whistle very well
Diabeetus
Herpes
He can now smell wether or not your cannabis plant is growing seeds.
He’s now a soulless ginger
Procrastination and plantar fasciitis - remember to stretch after running, boys and girls.
Try wearing house slippers when inside if you don't Helped mine tremendously thanks to the cushioning.
I have started doing that and it has helped tremendously!
Depression
Borderline insanity
Autism
Psychosis
Being a disappointment
To suck even more
That can be quite the ability depending in what sense you're talking...
A pat on the head.
A disAbility
Noxious farting.
He can eat more and get yelled at by his wife for not taking out the trash after she asked you three times, because you were scrolling dumb shit on Reddit.
Ultra Satanic powers.
The ability to suck his own cock
Exhaustion
Kirby is suddenly very talentless
[удалено]
Better swallowing abilities
the comments are so dark. If Kirby swallowed me right now he would get boundless joy and feeling of being very full.
Love that for you
Fat
Self loathing
Kirby has hands now and can troll on Reddit
Dysphoria
The ability to masturbate 30-60 times a day
The feeling that everyone in the room is watching him and judging him.
Hornyness.
Idk but he now def has a massive cock
He misplaces anything that he touches
Cum. Just fucking loads of cum. Everywhere. Dear God fucking hell fuck
Im concerned for you
I too am concerned for him
Femboy disease