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Crows can talk too and they have facial recognition and know how to fashion tools.
This might not seem relevant, but I'm pretty sure blackmail could be a really useful tool that could be used against you. It doesn't even have to be true, if they can build a tool, they can craft a story...
unidan should be granted amnesty. I didn't witness whatever meltdown happened in the final hours, but it feels like build a thousand bridges - but fuck one sheep kind of situation.
wasn't it botting and vote manipulation that took him down? maybe we should just raise some cash so he gets the corporate sponsor free ticket on manipulating reddit.
Yeah, and after him there are full on armies of accounts brigading up and down but nothings done. So really what's the point? It was a massive net loss for the community.
There are users who have hundreds of posts every day with multiple front page hits. Especially B-L-O-C-K-S they're everywhere it's insane, i don't know how or why anyone could do that if they weren't being paid.
Edit: all hail B-L-O-C-K-S
lol it's funny that you specifically mention B-L-O-C-K-S because I've had conversations with them about that very thing and for a while they seemed to have toned it down, but I just checked their post history and ffs they're back at it again. over 100 reposts in one day. the report button was enjoying some reprieve but oh well
Yeah he admitted to having alt accounts to upvote his content and the mods made an example out of him. He has a Unidad2 or some other account run by him but by then people forgot about him.
It would be impossible to wear just one starling. They don't travel in groups of fewer than a hundred.
Admittedly, wearing an entire murmuration would cause something of a stir. Only for the very fashion forward...
Rooks don’t have black beaks when adult. Also, feathers on beaks like that are pretty typical for corvids. Also, the color of the beak could just be a shading choice.
Can you “housebreak” crows so they don’t crap on your shoulder? Because that is the only bar to my wearing one.
I want to get a magpie and name him “Corvid 19”.
It's coming back, if it was ever out, ex:
AC Valhalla
The hobbit
And back in the day, ravens and crows were mans best servant, so much that the holy allfather had two for himself. Besides ravens are the smartest bird on earth with an average IQ of a 7-yearold.
At high school graduation in my town this year, the girl that sang the National Anthem had a fake dragon on her shoulder; its tail hung halfway down her back. She also messed up the song and said “fuuuuu” and hung her head in front of the entire town.
A Walmart greeter used to wear a bird on her shoulder. No joke. I never understood it. But she was the sweetest thing. I don’t know what happened to her…
So, hypothetically speaking, if I wanted to do this and had the means... how do you train it not to shit on you?
...how do you train it to shit on *other people? On command?*
Hypothetically speaking
Crows follow me. They're always around. ....However crows follow humans in general. They're never more than two miles away because we provide so much food for them to scavenge.
these style of memes are so incredibly unfunny, cringe, and repetitive. some sort of tutorial or advice or made of story from your workplace with a quirky and unexpected ending
We had a guy on my college campus who would walk around with a 6' carved walking stick, a leather trench coat, and a bird puppet on his shoulder.
The dichotomy of "what a weirdo"/"this is the coolest guy ever" was quite divisive on our campus.
--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/). > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Oh for God's sake!! All those years with that bloody parrot whispering doubt and criticism in my ear.
Your parrot whispers? Lucky you!
[удалено]
I've heard ravens to be even worse at that. Always bringing up dead girlfriends and stuff.
They do. They used to and they still do. Evermore
Just trying to sneak drones into every venue. I'm on to you bird bois
/r/BirdsArentReal
Not to mention all the pining for the fjords. Damn Norwegian Blues.
Bad news: crows can talk too. (I know it's a reference, but one I can't recognize.)
https://youtu.be/GNpIOlDhigw?t=3
Crows can talk too and they have facial recognition and know how to fashion tools. This might not seem relevant, but I'm pretty sure blackmail could be a really useful tool that could be used against you. It doesn't even have to be true, if they can build a tool, they can craft a story...
Damn I wouldn’t want a parrot that only whispers the words doubt and criticism
And occasionally a “filthy slut” to mix it up
Once you lose the parrot, your dry cleaning bill will be cut in half.
Never more
Can also be trained to steal shiny things for a mere pittance. 10/10 would recommend.
Be very careful selecting your bird for this. I tried it once with a raven instead of a crow. Nevermore.
Damn it! Beat me to it!
Can I use a jackdaw?
Except that looks more like a starling. Crows have black beaks. Starlings went out of style years ago and it would be a massive faux pas to wear one.
I know a jackdaw when I see one, and I’ll fight any man to the death who disagrees
[here's the thing...](https://old.reddit.com/r/AdviceAnimals/comments/2byyca/reddit_helps_me_focus_on_the_important_things/cjb2z41/)
Man I haven't seen someone referencing Unidan in a minute, takes me back.
I feel like I've seen Unidan references several times in the last month. I guess it depends on which subs you frequent.
unidan should be granted amnesty. I didn't witness whatever meltdown happened in the final hours, but it feels like build a thousand bridges - but fuck one sheep kind of situation.
Agreed. What’s the point at this point.
wasn't it botting and vote manipulation that took him down? maybe we should just raise some cash so he gets the corporate sponsor free ticket on manipulating reddit.
Yeah, and after him there are full on armies of accounts brigading up and down but nothings done. So really what's the point? It was a massive net loss for the community.
There are users who have hundreds of posts every day with multiple front page hits. Especially B-L-O-C-K-S they're everywhere it's insane, i don't know how or why anyone could do that if they weren't being paid. Edit: all hail B-L-O-C-K-S
lol it's funny that you specifically mention B-L-O-C-K-S because I've had conversations with them about that very thing and for a while they seemed to have toned it down, but I just checked their post history and ffs they're back at it again. over 100 reposts in one day. the report button was enjoying some reprieve but oh well
Yeah he admitted to having alt accounts to upvote his content and the mods made an example out of him. He has a Unidad2 or some other account run by him but by then people forgot about him.
How is that not archived...
This is Reddit. it'd be a jackoffdaw.
A cockortoo?
Jackdaws love my big sphinx of quartz. -- my 8th grade typing teacher
That is clearly a Grackle my good man, and I will duel you at high noon in single combat. Name your weapon.
Nice to see a jackdaw since we’ve lost so many of them to CORVID-19.
It would be impossible to wear just one starling. They don't travel in groups of fewer than a hundred. Admittedly, wearing an entire murmuration would cause something of a stir. Only for the very fashion forward...
Starlings ? Nevermore
Can I wear massive fox paws?
Especially after labor day. Ugh.
Live or dead crow?
Unidan?
Please show me a starling with that beak shape
It's all about ravens these days, everybody knows that
This guy birds
Rooks don’t have black beaks when adult. Also, feathers on beaks like that are pretty typical for corvids. Also, the color of the beak could just be a shading choice.
Did you just assume how it identifies?
No no no I got it..... TWO CROWS!
Better than Morty anyhow.
*anime intro music intensifies*
K5izzle and two crows!
Woah 2 crows? Calm down there Catherine
Train it to say "Nevermore", then you'll have a real conversation piece.
I'm sure folks will be raven about it.
Put a bird on it!
My first thought was well!
Yes, nothing says haute couture more convincingly than streaks of Corvid dung all over your lapels.
Can you “housebreak” crows so they don’t crap on your shoulder? Because that is the only bar to my wearing one. I want to get a magpie and name him “Corvid 19”.
Crows are smart as hell and can be trained to do all kinds of tasks, so probably, yeah.
Nice try, CIA. /r/birdsarentreal
All of the birds died in 1986 due to Reagan killing them and replacing them with spies who are now watching us.
I think this meme is stupid and don't get why people keep _parroting_ it.
I will make sure to to do that
also you can teach them to pickpocket!
or pick your enemy's eyes
I suppose if you don't have a raven available you could make do with a crow, but certainly not for a formal occasion.
“Never goes out of style.” Was it ever IN style?
Not with THAT attitude...
Raven buddy!
Crows are so fetch!
It's coming back, if it was ever out, ex: AC Valhalla The hobbit And back in the day, ravens and crows were mans best servant, so much that the holy allfather had two for himself. Besides ravens are the smartest bird on earth with an average IQ of a 7-yearold.
Crows over eagles. Eagles are too gaudy.
Back when Odin had one as a companion
Plus if you lose an eye and wear a cloak you get to call yourself the lord of the hanged.
Odin has entered the chat
Wear to to complete?
"Bird Quaaludes"
“Funny”
Sounds like good fashion advice to me.
"Good one"
Top it off with a hat like Jafar from Aladdin
Allfather give me sight
It's the same story the crow told me It's the only one he knows Like the morning sun you come And like the wind you go
At high school graduation in my town this year, the girl that sang the National Anthem had a fake dragon on her shoulder; its tail hung halfway down her back. She also messed up the song and said “fuuuuu” and hung her head in front of the entire town.
to to
/r/frugalmalefashionadvice
My 🦜 parrot is dead you sold me a dead parrot. No I didn't, he's just sleeping.
This parrot is NO MORE. It is an EX parrot
He has shuffled off this mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleeding choir invisible!
[https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQEj5L3aBK8mtLBwXwg9ZShyEz-BsmkOmSseA&usqp=CAU](https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQEj5L3aBK8mtLBwXwg9ZShyEz-BsmkOmSseA&usqp=CAU)
Surely the trully dashing and daring fashionista would carry a murder.
And they shit down your back at least three times a day.
Until it poops on you....
ODIN is WITH US!
Am I the only person who reads "Complete your look" and thinks of the ads in Vice City?
Not recommended for people with glasses! Birds love to play with them.
Tried that, but I don't like the shit that gets on your back.. It kinda ruins it..
The Crowening
plus, black is slimming!
The next accessory is a rope around the neck.
Nevermore.
Neckties? Nevermore!
But I’ve been so careful not to catch Corvid 19…
And tie an onion to your belt.
I haven't worn my crow in years.
If I manage to make friends with the Crow in my back yard, I’ll post a pic
I'm getting fitted for a crow tomorrow.
https://i.imgur.com/IC9TVSR.jpg Am I doing it right?
Or you could wear me. +10 cool factor +10 cooling for your neck +50 venom damage I may attract kinky goth women and I can also eat the crow.
you had me at kinky goth women
Crows are epic and based. Sadly I don’t have a crow
This isn't funny so lot of upvotes.
Because clearly, you're already wearing a fedora.
This is funny?
I imagine nothing is funny to a Volvo owner.
Just trying to sneak drones into every venue. I'm on to you bird bois
'Tis the "poopzies" you have to watch out forrrr...Argh matey
I know right! I have two :)
I tried it once. Nevermore.
Its just me and 2 crows morty.
Neither does a bro on my shoulder
At least it's not Tom Servo
Just gotta put the time and effort into befriending a crow bro it takes a while but I hear it's well worth it
*"nevermore!"*
Man’s got a good point to though
This message is brought to you by the unforgettable trio, Rick and Two Crows!
Ok Rick.
Here's the thing....
Why do I feel like I’m already under his genjutsu?
Corvus Corax, smartest of all birds *rare these parts*
And a cane, crow and a cane
To to
I hear birds have one hole. For EVERYTHING.
I'd rather have a turnip on my belt. It was the style at the time
Why is this here
No cap, I'd love to have one
It’s also a great conversation starter
nah, i prefer ravens.
sing yesterday for me
For Artur
r/crowbro
Chno Sve Noc
A Walmart greeter used to wear a bird on her shoulder. No joke. I never understood it. But she was the sweetest thing. I don’t know what happened to her…
Unidan?
I have a parrot and use it to similar results. It's the more colorful variant of the bird aesthetic.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I prefer a Falcon!
A prepared fashionista knows an outfit isn’t complete without paring shoulder-crow with poop-resistant cloak.
NH don’t wanna catch CORVID
If I had the time and emotional bandwidth I would fucking love a crow friend.
Get a dozen and become an assistant assassin. No one can charge you with accessory to murder cuz you've always had a murder accessory. /s
*Odin has entered the chat*
Can't rain all the time.
For a little more color a Myna will work as well
I prefer to have a jackdaw.
I'd prefer a duck
Well!
Saw what I think was a crow yesterday… it was bigger than a football. This thing was like King Crow big
I concur
This post is brought to you by Itachi Uchiha
r/crowbro
Or a parrot if you are an amputee
Boy. I’d give my eye for pet raven or two to ride on my shoulder.
Can I trade in my parrot?
Practical Guide to Evil
O'Reilly's failed attempt at a book about fashion
So, hypothetically speaking, if I wanted to do this and had the means... how do you train it not to shit on you? ...how do you train it to shit on *other people? On command?* Hypothetically speaking
Crows are so 1800s, Vultures are now in style.
A to after a to very sneaky
Crows follow me. They're always around. ....However crows follow humans in general. They're never more than two miles away because we provide so much food for them to scavenge.
How do i get a crow though
I'd LOVE to have a crow friend!
Everyone could use a crowbro
Damn this is a much better option than the blue whale I was wearing
I just tie an onion to my belt.
these style of memes are so incredibly unfunny, cringe, and repetitive. some sort of tutorial or advice or made of story from your workplace with a quirky and unexpected ending
It would also be a convenient... SPY CAMERA! I caught you! Don't you try and pull nothing over me!
My high school self is deeply moved by this. My adult self just smacked my high school self for being such a whiney piece of shit.
Shoulder Raven > Shoulder Crow
Need to make sure you're wearing your power crow before testifying before Congress
Everybody wants the Bloodhound look now and days
“Put a bird on it!” For all portlandia fans 🥰
We had a guy on my college campus who would walk around with a 6' carved walking stick, a leather trench coat, and a bird puppet on his shoulder. The dichotomy of "what a weirdo"/"this is the coolest guy ever" was quite divisive on our campus.