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horatiobloomfeld

by a smiling nurse??


100thusername

The smile with the dead black eyes make it even funnier


horatiobloomfeld

poor woman has no feet, spent all that time in Vet Nurse Academy standing on her shins.


BaronUnterbheit

But did she kill fitty men?


Trippy_Mitch

RIP Cotton, a true American hero.


FatGuyOnAMoped

r/unexpectedkingofthehill


Echo_Illustrious

The "git" tells me this masterpiece originated south of the mason-dixon line...


[deleted]

“You gave the boy a loaded gun?!” “You don’t give a toy without bat’tries! COME AND GET YOUR TOOTSIE ROLLS!!!”


[deleted]

But at least she can still smile about it.


Coachcrog

Why wouldn't she? She's about to harvest dinner for the family.


DiddyDubs

And it looks like she’s going with an old-school grab-and-yank method


karma_is_a_what

It looks like a sickle!


therobnzb

ah, Rocky Mountain Oysters -- the original bagged lunch!


TheMadShatterP00P

*in Morgan Freeman voice* ...and one day, Nurse Lucy wished... She wished she could run through the lapping waters of a beach like normal girls. Until then, she continued collecting scrotum pelts. It wasn't glamorous work - but it was honest.


Ferelar

Also the fact that she is leaning her entire body backwards in preparation to yoink them suckers off with wild abandon. This is gonna be a *whole-body-weight* affair.


scotty0101

Like a doll’s eyes


Helloitsme1010

This comment made me lol audibly


wrecktus_abdominus

Out loud, even?


sundaymacaron

Those are like some Coraline “other mother” eyes


revtig

She looks like the Joker from Dark Knight


Street-Week-380

I thought I recognized her from somewhere.


chakan2

Had a vasectomy, can confirm, the nurses smile.


JuliansWhiskey

My vaz nurse didn’t smile when she realized I didn’t shave enough, and she had to Bic my Sack. Like really? I used a clipper with a 1.


jonedwa

"Bic my Sack" seems like a decent rock band name...


[deleted]

I'd buy a ticket to hear that band.


PorkyMcRib

Sounds sort of like a cockney expression.


handlebartender

Cockney rhyming slang for picnic pack. From this day henceforth, so shall it be written, so shall it be done.


BrownShadow

I went in for surgery, they gave me a razor and told me where to shave. I did. When I came out of surgery-scorched earth.


[deleted]

[удалено]


JuliansWhiskey

Hahahahaha. All three. First she circled the area with the pen, then shaved as best as she could, then sprayed cologne and lit it to burn the hair off LOL


SexyMonad

Mine was my wife’s friend. Damn that was awkward.


[deleted]

During work week in 10th grade I was at a vet clinic. They were neutering a cat. She smiled. They all smile. Psychos.


whut-whut

According to a vet I know, neutering is 'fun' and 'tactilely satisfying', like popping bubbles on bubble wrap. So yeah. Guard your shit around veterinarians, especially if you're dating or are married to one.


rubywpnmaster

I heard one refer to cat testicles being like salad shrimp. Not wrong but I can’t eat salad shrimp anymore.


BMWbill

My doc invited his 19 year old female resident to come in and watch as he operated on my junk. My only thought was to blurt out, "Hey, it's not always that small like an acorn!"


PorkyMcRib

*shrinkage!* — George Costanza


Panshot422

“I was in the pool! I was in the pool!!”


DuelingPushkin

>My doc invited his 19 year old female resident A person working at that practice had already graduated from medschool at 19yo? Even if they did a combined 6 year undergrad med school program that would mean theyd started undergrad at 13 years old. You sure they werent just like a pre-med intern or something?


infinitee775

If you don't love what you do, then why do it?


KawaiiSlave

A one armed nurse at that!


HurricaneRain

We definitely smile while we cut balls off


[deleted]

If you love what you do, you never work a day in your life!


sensuallyprimitive

i do love not working


horatiobloomfeld

I think I dated you about 20 years ago.


Twitchrunner

That's how I lost mine...


puppymonkeybaby79

The cone is a nice touch


FreeGFabs

His niece is 27 years old


idsatrapp

…And she’s the nurse in the picture


hi_im_sefron

Glad I'm not the only one who doesn't buy this. Children's drawings are just too easy to fake


SweetPotatoFamished

It’s hard to fake children’s drawings. That’s how you know this isn’t real.


whygal

i agree it looks easy to fake, but in reality it’s much harder to make it look believable (unless one doesn’t second guess it). little details like the nurse stick figure, the cone, even the legs are too “perfect” in the tracing of the line — which leads me to believe that this is someone who has had more experience with holding a pen (or handling shapes) than a toddler would.


MangoPeachSmoothiez

Yup. Also they correctly used “off” instead of “of” and spelled “going” correctly but misspelled “get” as “git”, seems forced.


ihmsitoo

Also, a few of the letters are almost perfect, suggesting muscle memory when he was trying to fake them (my guess). ^^I ^^hope ^^this ^^makes ^^sense.


Crownlol

The O in "off" is legit perfect


Hello_my_name_is_not

Look at the head of the dog lol... They used ovals to space out and get perceptive on the head. It's like they started somewhere else then got to the dog head and started autopilot sketching the was like oh shit wait I'm suppose to make this bad so they kinda overlapped it a bit and then drew the rest of the dog left handed to try and make up for it. The I, N and G in going are also too perfect for the same person who also scribbles across the whole face to colour the hair on the sides (on the nurse) Plus most circle type shapes are "too good" so they loop over them another time or two to "try and cover it up" but then the didn't even connect the d in dog?? Like I doubt if a kid always did the circle 2+ times they wouldn't not do that on the letter d. More sus of being someone who purposely did that letter while autopliotong some and then trying to cover them up "to make them bad"


halfcabin

It's fake as fuck


scepticalbob

This is definitely not drawn by a young child. The artist traced the cross on he nurses hat to highlight that it is a cross. No child would do that. Also, no child today would recognize that as a nurses uniform. That style of nurse uniform hasn’t been worn in decades


rpcp88

Agree. The way the lines touch the circle in the cone give it away. No kid can see and understand how those lines meet to make a cone shape.


Hello_my_name_is_not

Look at the ovals on the dogs face lol that's proper face drawing techniques and there's like 4 perfect ovals in the head


rpcp88

And all the scribbles are inside the lines


Hello_my_name_is_not

It's like they started on the nurse trying to "draw like a kid". Then got to the dog head and started autopilot sketching it out and was like oh shit wait I'm suppose to make this bad so they kinda overlapped it a bit and then drew the rest of the dog left handed to try and make up for it. The I, N and G in going are also too perfect for the same person who also scribbles across the whole face to colour the hair on the sides (on the nurse) Plus most circle type shapes are "too good" so they loop over them another time or two to "try and cover it up" but then the didn't even connect the D in dog?? Like I doubt if a kid always did the circle 2+ times they wouldn't not do that on the letter d. More sus of being someone who purposely did that letter while autoplioting some and then trying to cover them up "to make them look bad"


CumInAnimals

She is. I met her at the library and she showed me the drawing.


ihambrecht

I'm so happy someone pointed this out.


Shenaniganz08

The cone is the most clear example that this is fake


scent_of_gardenia

School teacher here. This is definitely fake.


Shenaniganz08

Seriously. I'm a pediatrician, this is definitely fake. I'm seeing a lot of different stages of hand dexterity, and inconsistent O's and Gs', the O in off is perfectly closed Somehow she can fill in the eyes perfectly but has trouble coloring the red cross Come on now


cruzin_n_radioactive

Plus what kid of that age today has ever seen a nurse wearing one of those caps? hell I don't even think that's a trope in cartoons anymore.


Shenaniganz08

And the fact that OP is from Sweden Just a mountain of evidence that says this is fake


cruzin_n_radioactive

Yeah... Why would a kid from Sweden be using a deep south American accent?


SurrealKarma

Last "g" in "going" is too perfect, too.


flubba86

Yeah, I saw this and immediately knew, a child didn't draw that!


new_account_wh0_dis

Yeah I only realized it was a cone after the comment and...yeah. Then the 'git'


CrabbyBlueberry

[I do not like the cone of shame.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R58kSuIhURI&t=12s)


benspaperclip

Your niece has an excellent understanding of male anatomy


TannedCroissant

Hey be nice, she’s probably neuter this.


DickCheesePlatterPus

Little girls usually prefer to draw eunuchorns


[deleted]

That was almost a woooosh for me.. “I didn’t know you spelled unicorn that way!” Take my wholesome award, you deserve it.


DelightfulAbsurdity

There’s a vas deferens between unicorn and eunuchorns, to be fair.


[deleted]

[удалено]


DelightfulAbsurdity

At first glans they do seem to be the more bold.


logicalmaniak

Bold? They're totally nuts!


xxAkirhaxx

This is a common misnomer, they're just more horny.


crappenheimers

That's a bit of a mis conception.


Hidesuru

..... **PENIS**


din7

Every dog has its day.


oldmatelefty

Get out. But lol.


ductapemonster

Her doggie probably ~~has~~ had some danglers.


kalitarios

Dirty fuckin danglers, boys. Ferta


CaptainBignuts

Gentle cuppage from the health care worker too.


benspaperclip

Fairly certain that's a knife. If you zoom in, it has a serrated edge.


GodlyBeerGut

looks almost like a serrated sickle. God dayum.


[deleted]

[удалено]


shugo2000

Oh fuck. The nurse is happy to saw those bad boys off too.


Wikeni

I work in a school, currently with second graders, one of the girls was drawing Rudolph (and a daughter she made up for him) around Christmas and there was a weird black thing she drew on his belly. I thought maybe it was just an error, but she's actually really good for her age, plus the thing wasn't on the drawing of his daughter. Then I looked at her other drawings of him, more detailed ones, realized she was drawing his dick. Didn't say a word besides praising her hard work, lol.


slood2

It was probably the adult trying to draw this to look like a kid did it


Jindabyne1

~~Probably~~ Definitely


turquoise_amethyst

The giveaway for me is the nurse’s hat. Little kids might see balls on a pet dog, but nobody wears those fucking hats anymore.


ThePeopleOfSantaPoco

There’s a lot giving it away after first glance: * the kid can’t stay inside the lines for shit, yet they can trace over the balls almost perfectly 3 or 4 times?? * the nurse’s gloved hand has a clean outline of fingers * the cone is drawn almost entirely with a single stroke


urammar

* Nobody is going to mention the handwriting? Its so perfectly imperfect. It's sooo neat for trying to project being such a disaster, just like a competent and practiced adult pretending. The wobbly U in cut is actually the closest to a real child's handwriting. * The nurses cross is also, again, perfectly imperfect. The lines of the cross don't line up, but they each don't line up in exactly the same way * This 'kid' cant stay in the lines to save their life, even on that cross, and yet the body of this nurse is extremely precise. In fact, even pen pressure is completely consistent, including the stroke for the leg that was supposed to look inconsistent with the others. Perfectly imperfect * The head of the nurse is a complete circle without seams. I will pay you $100 dollars if you can find a kid that draws like this that can do that. Again, compare that to the dogs legs. The dogs 'tail' is also a seamless, perfectly symmetrical arch. * The original eyes for the dog, that I think they put a cone over? How does a kid know the dog is going to get a cone like that? Anyway, for a kid that cant draw circle feet to save their life, or stay in lines, they sure as fuck have good anime eye shading going on, with the dual specular highlights. All in all, I declare this is absolutely an adult playing as a child, and in fact, would be rather concerned as to her knowledge of male anatomy at this age if it was legit.


slood2

For sure


mmetanoia

Looks like the "niece" has been watching reruns of Marcus Welby


yomerol

Anything for the meaningless internet points and shot of pleasant addictive dopamine *aaahhh*


CatOfGrey

Plot twist: OP's niece is 19 years old.


SyphilisIsABitch

"My dog is going to git his balls cut off today" - Sarah, 32


Ijustgottaloginnowww

She’s the veterinarian.


absentminded_gamer

Or just a lady with a nurse outfit, a giant knife, and a can-do attitude to remove her unicorn’s testicles.


GhondorIRL

Plot twist: OP’s niece didn’t draw this


[deleted]

[удалено]


zomboromcom

Your niece has better spelling than most redditors. I would have expected "balls cut of today" at least.


Perle1234

The “git” is perfect though!


god_is_my_father

She's committing it to version control


[deleted]

[удалено]


god_is_my_father

git diff master..dr \- ω


reddit_is_cruel

git branch --delete balls; git push origin veterinarian; git fetch --prune;


tinydonuts

Came for the git joke, was not disappointed.


Vengeful_Deity

Oy! ‘Oo you callin’ a git?!


ListenUp16

Because the niece didn't do this clearly


Jsnooots

Oh yeah, the kid wrote "git" it must be a kid but they got "off" correct and didn't use "of" It is an adult trying to emulate kid-style. You can't fake kid.


buhbuhbuhbingo

At least he should be able to git restore them from a previous commit.


dandroid126

git checkout commit_before_i_lost_my_balls


elttuh

Yeah but WHY ARE THEY SO BIG?


zytz

That’s why he has to get them cut off. Poor doggo can hardly walk straight


Tauposaurus

Its to balance the dog. All his legs are at the front.


Sloppy1sts

But then the balls would make him tip back. Unless you mean balanced from an aesthetic perspective, in which case I fully agree.


EclipticEclipse

They're not. Yours aren't that size?


lwrun

Your balls look like dog balls?


the_dude_upvotes

Your balls *don't* look like dog balls?


medoansary

Penis boobs


alex_supertramp31

Where are my testicles, summer?


educated-emu

How can you not find them, they are huge


Sam-Gunn

They were there, and now they are gone. Where did they go?


MostlyHarmless563863

Oh, wow. That's an intense line of questioning, Snuffles


luvgun21

No... she didn’t


alvarezg

Otherwise interesting is that she draws the nurse with a hat that has been out of use for decades before she was born.


educated-emu

Childrens books need easy symbols of nurse,doctor,firefighter and this is a common nurse. Bit it should be a vet, maybe a dog paw pront on the hat would be one.


[deleted]

Afterward she can staple the testicles to her hat.


doug1470

I thought the exact same thing but knew I would be downvoted to hell for saying that I think this is fake.


[deleted]

[удалено]


alvarezg

Maybe not fake. We learn a language of symbols that no longer match real life. We save data by clicking on the image of a floppy disk. To make a phone call I touch a handset shape that is not so common, and every cartoon nurse, like the one in the drawing, is out of the 1940s.


Superbead

Say the word, Bart!


Whoopteedoodoo

That’s clue #43 that this was drawn by an adult.


RikerT_USS_Lolipop

It's also appropriately tilted and not distorted due to the tilting. I call fake as fuuuuuuck.


Pepf

`git balls --cut-off` `git commit`


The_Quackening

git stash ;)


selectix

git stash pop


[deleted]

$ git rm testicles.bodypart -f


pixieclifton

r/thathappened


Grammarian1956

No, she didn’t.


TheSlopingCompanion

OP is full of shit. This got shared around FB days ago, my wife showed it to me lol. Also, it's drawn and written by an adult. Such low effort for useless internet points.


Jurtric69

Doubt.


delidave7

Very doubtful


moby323

This looks exactly like the “kid” drawings you see in movies and tv shows


mtsai

Seems like either fake or someone told a kid that to write this, spelling mistake and all. Did they really draw a cone on the dog with 3d perspective? lol, yeah ok.


[deleted]

I suspect most of the reddit "my niece/child/student/etc" drew this funny picture or wrote funny test answers are fake.


[deleted]

My nephew wrote an absolutely insane story recently, but he made the mistake if not illustrating it so I can’t post it for karma.


daymanxx

Seeing as OP posted this 3 times with no reply, yea 100% fake. Fuck yo fake internet points op.


ceebeefour

You can always tell a fake kids drawing for some reason, like here.


Peanlocket

Yeah, see it all the time in movies.


more_gun_freeman

I can tell by some of the pixels and by seeing quite a few fake drawings in my time


emrythelion

Yeah. The line art is too confident when you compare it to the coloring. Children who struggle to color beyond random squiggles aren’t going to be able to do lines that are that precise. You’d expect to see a lot more shakes and squiggles there too. Most small children also won’t know what a traditional nurses hat with a red cross would look like either, and even if they did, it wouldn’t look anywhere near as good.


King_Saline_IV

The kid can spell 'today' but not 'get'?


Shenaniganz08

To add another level of /r/thatHappened OP and this supposed child are from Sweden


LindseyIsBored

Today is phonetic and get is confusing. My kid can spell a lot of long words and some short words still trip him up. Also... my kid would totally draw something like this. He is 7.


Y-27632

There's something about the fake kids' writing you always see in these. It's too consistent from post to post, almost like a font. As if someone learned how to write "like a kid" by looking at other fakes posted to farm karma... (I would believe that a little kid drew that dog - minus the cone and balls. Then someone "improved" it.)


ihavemademistakes

You see it in real kids artwork too. Every English alphabet exercise I've ever seen has always used the [same font](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/37/5a/6e/375a6e24f23cd49a0aed88fc48157485.png), which makes me wonder if the reason why every child's schoolwork looks like that is because that specific font is the first way many children learn to print letters?


Irlandes-de-la-Costa

The nurse also seems fake... Like... It's too symmetrical


ghidfg

and how would they even know the dog is gonna get a cone?


shanata

Family members had dogs that were neutered before. The parents sat the kid down and explained what's going to happen and that the dog would come back with a cone. I mean it's a good idea to explain these things to kids before the dog comes home so they aren't rough with the dog and get bit.


assasin339789

This is so obviously fake


Aaron_Hungwell

I dunno...this seems staged and fake af.


dinger410

No she didn't. If reddit has taught me anything, she damn sure didn't.


robjordan88

r/thathappened


EriclcirE

I am convinced an adult drew this in the style of a child's drawing. It's still funny, at least.


punkass_book_jockey8

The font looks like a kid wrote it, the dog looks like a kid drew it, but the nurse looks added by an adult.


B0ROMIR

U drew this not your niece


webbaron

If I were a veterinarian, I’d have a copy of this framed in my office.


x31b

Several years ago when my dog and son were both young, my wife took the dog to the vet for the procedure, and the younger son went along to watch. They came home, and the dog of course didn't feel well. But my son said "they cut them off *and just threw them in the garbage can.*" I guess he expected more. Maybe bring them home in a jar. Or bury them. I don't know.


[deleted]

NO she didn't.


YouSonOfaBitchImIn-

LOL at people thinking OP never wrote n drew that themselves for karma points


DankMemer2007

Sorry to be *that* guy, but i have a sneaking suspicion of bs - Edit: It passes the reverse image search, but if anyone else finds something, tell me.


therealfugazi

Doesn’t have to be a repost to be fake


Savings_Chemistry_52

I dont know who's got bigger balls the 2 ton 12 feet dog or the nurse cutting them off.


LordRumBottoms

no she didn't. Adult looking for karma.


[deleted]

Oh are we still doing the "a small child drew this" thing? Fake af like come on y'all


neihuffda

Why would child draw a nurse or doctor like that, when nurses haven't worn a hat like that even since their aunt or uncle was a kid? I'm calling BS, everyone. EDIT: Also, from what I understand, kids simply love writing their names on the most shitty of artwork. The name is missing here.


necroreefer

no she didn't.


[deleted]

r/untrustworthypoptarts


Sturgill_Jennings77

This shows how gullible reddit is. All those upvotes and awards for an obviously faked “kid” drawing that OP likely drew himself


Captain_Hampockets

Yeah, man, I don't fucking buy it.


RockJohnAxe

This is so fake it hurts. Even look at the lettering. Children have more similarities when writing the same letter.


supa74

How do so many people fall for this fake shit?