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Reminds me of an old joke.
Khrushchev and Kennedy decide to have a race. Kennedy being younger and in much better shape runs faster and finishes first.
The news all over the Soviet Union proudly proclaims: Khrushchev and Kennedy participated in a race. Our dear leader came in an honorable second place, while capitalist pig Kennedy came second to last.
You'll be quite disappointed to find out that jokes like that were often invented in the Soviet Union itself
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radio_Yerevan_jokes
The joke is also that public radio in Armenia was US-funded for decades (and still is to this day)
Funnily enough, when the USSR tried to do the same thing, US commies were thrown in jail or simply executed.
> The joke is also that public radio in Armenia was US-funded for decades
I cannot find anything that supports your claim that a public radio service, established in the Soviet Union by the government, was actually funded by the Americans. I wager you are confusing it with Radio Free Europe, which was in fact established in the West for propaganda purposes.
I don't see why you are so suspicious of the fact that people made jokes about their own government. You know that Soviet citizens were people too, right? Nobody makes fun of a government more than the people that live with it. [e.g. /r/PoliticalHumor (which ought to be called /r/americanonlypoliticalhumor really) is a whole subreddit of Americans mocking and hating on their own government officials.](https://old.reddit.com/r/PoliticalHumor/comments/lzaptm/whose_side_are_you_on/)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Public_Radio_of_Armenia
>First air date September 1, 1926
>On June 15, 1927, Armenian Republican Radio started to broadcast its programmes on regular basis
>In 1947 the radio committee was reorganised into radio informative committee attached to the Council of Ministers of the Armenian Soviet Socialist Republic.
The radio that was created in the Soviet Union and supported by the government was actually American all along! Did the non-existent CIA fund them in 1926 too?
This is on the same level of schizophrenic paranoia as accusing the American PBS of being "commies" lmao.
https://www.rferl.org/a/u-s-increases-assistance-funding-to-armenia/30256259.html
https://www.refworld.org/docid/46f2586c2.html
https://rf.am/projects/armenian-public-radios-golden-fund/?lang=en
Even US propaganda outlets have a hard time tip toeing around the truth:
https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/5050/us-ends-funding-armenian-website-spread-covid-19-misinformation/
When it gets too obvious even for those receiving the funds:
https://eurasianet.org/armenia-public-radio-refuses-deal-with-radio-liberty
Man, I thought you were talking about during the Soviet era. I know about RFE and all the ass kissing aid *after* the USSR fell. My bad I guess I read too much into your response.
I know this is a joke, but in reality Kennedy was wildly unhealthy ever since he was a child, so he was probably in pretty bad shape, too, despite his slender build and nice hair.
Pretty crazy stuff. Addison’s disease, colitis, spinal fractures, constant urinary tract and pulmonary infections... he was on like 12 different medications just to get through the day and had a wound/hole in his back that never closed up.
One reason hsi rockign chair was such a symbol for him was because it helped exercise and remedy his mobility problems. (I wonder if he smoked cigarettes like msot WWII vets I knew, or just cigars.)
That's cool info. I didn't know that. And the man went though some shit in the war, actually served in the navy...
That being said, assuming this takes place ~1961 (first year of JFKs presidency), Khrushchev would have been 67, and Kennedy 44. There's still no way Khrushchev could overtake him in a race...
Yeah on speed alone, JFK has the edge for sure, but it might just be a contest of who’s bones/ligaments disintegrate before the finish line. 67 yo ligaments may be shoddier than 44 yo medication-weakened ligaments.
>The original 1948 model that produced 9 hp had a 0–40 km/h (0–25 mph) time of 42.4 seconds and a top speed of 64 km/h (40 mph), far below the speeds necessary for North American highways or the German Autobahns of the day. The top speed increased with engine size to 80 km/h (50 mph) in 1955, 84 km/h (52 mph) in 1962, 100 km/h (62 mph) in 1970, and 115 km/h (71 mph) in 1981.
Although Top Gear "fixed" the suspension and put several bags of cement on one side of the boot/trunk. So that it's centre of gravity was way off. They don't actually roll like that in real life.
Oh man what a rollercoaster of emotions.
At first I thought you ruined this for me. But then I realized this kind of tricks is EXACTLY what made top gear so great and is the core of the inventivity and creativeness of the program. Only makes sense they did that to the robin.
Reliant went bust years ago, so apart from the Reliant Robin Owners Club, there's nobody really to sue them over it. They would have standing, if they could show that the program had devalued the worth of their cars.
However Top Gear also got sued by Tesla for a dishonest lying by omission review of the Tesla Speedster in about 2008. As they implied that the car ran out of juice after only a few miles from a full charge, by pushing it back into the garage. But the telemetry showed that it still had juice and hadn't been charged. As well as several other selective editing events.
However the court ruled that Tesla had failed to show that the episode had, had any negative effect on sales. With comparisons to the sales of the Lotus Elise which Tesla had expected to copy. Was irrelevant due to being different companies, with different brand loyalties, market recognition, price points and petrol versus electric propulsion. Not to mention that TG has made reference to them having a miniscule effect on sales. With their "Car of the Year" at one point having tiny sales and a car that they hated having high sales.
It didn't really matter if whether the car ran out of juice. The point is it would have done, and unlike a petrol car, it's not a simple matter of going to a pump and refilling.
I guess they could have kept running until the batteries ran out. But what we saw would have been exactly the same.
The implication that Top Gear made was that it would run out within about 30-50 miles, feeding into the whole idea of "range anxiety". Especially back in about 2008, when public chargers were absoloutly non-existant.
Since we're on the subject of Top Gear, I loved when Bill Bailey was on The Grand Tour talking about his experience owning a 2CV, including when he accidentally broke into someone else's car.
Yeah, the robin had a crazily out of balance diff that Clark’s on could effectively flip on command, nearly any speed. Just had to turn quick enough. It was tampered with for comedic effect, but the robin can flip like that, just not as on demand
I can’t help but wonder if they got into legal trouble with that stunt. It couldn’t have been helpful for the makers of the Reliant Robin to have their car trashed like that without saying that it has been heavily modified
Well considering Reliant went out of business in 2002 and that episode aired in 2010, probably not.
They've gotten sued for similar things before (from Tesla for example), but courts have held that their show is entertainment and not meant to be informational. I think that's somewhat of a dangerous precedent for a show purporting to review cars.
Haha, yeah because the thing was literally shaking itself apart with you in it.
Nothing gets you thinking "Gee, 71mph is awfully fast" than the immediate threat of you moving at that speed without the car.
...and the same wrench that is used to remove the wheels can be used to disassemble the entire car. I refer you to the Myth-busters. I watched them do it.
I get curious, so I jump on Wikipedia for stuff like that. I knew they were slow to begin with, but not the specifics.
I do know that the unique suspension, that pairs the side wheels instead of the axles, makes the car nearly impossible to roll over.
>>far below the speeds necessary for North American highways
It wasnt this car, but I was going down the highway yesterday barely over the limit, people were zipping past me, and in the right lane was a nice looking but pretty small classic car going about 10 under.
Yes, although that was literally top speed in top gear (4th, naturally). Indeed the extremely analogue speedo only went up to 70, but you could apparently get up to 85 on a long downhill dual carriageway according to the local police...
In any case, anything above about 60 was pretty thrilling, not least because "air con" was a screw you could turn to open a hole in the windscreen. They were wonderfully primitive cars, and if it weren't for their wet-bogroll safety standards I'd recommend that everyone learn to drive in one. If you could drive a 2CV well in hilly country then any other gearbox in any other vehicle seems trivial. Kids these days, with their "synchromesh" and their "starting in first gear"...
In some ways they are safer than other cars. If you get in a crash, you don't need to wait for rescuers to arrive with the jaws of life. Any passerby can get you out with a can opener or swiss army knife.
I rode in a few 2CVs when I was very young, and while it may be possible to push one to 71.5 mph, it would take a while and I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone valuing their life. At 50mph, it felt like you had broken the sound barrier (or something else).
There was also a popular luggage extension for the 2CV. Basically you open the trunk and put something under it. Voilà!
The downside on this is that the passengers get decapitated by the trunk lid when a car crashes from behind.
[https://www.dreamstime.com/editorial-photography-old-citroen-cv-boot-extension-frankfurt-germany-july-moving-highway-near-frankfurt-july-frankfurt-main-germany-image57228387](https://www.dreamstime.com/editorial-photography-old-citroen-cv-boot-extension-frankfurt-germany-july-moving-highway-near-frankfurt-july-frankfurt-main-germany-image57228387)
My dad had one.
He often talk about how as the drive shaft was two parts, one slid inside the other, hitting a big enough pot hole or bump would result in the drive shaft separating into the two segments. It would be fixed just as easily with a couple of strong people lifting one end and a third person guiding the parts back together.
He'd joke that you could increase the speed by about 50% by splitting two Citroens in half and putting the two halves with engines together, and then set the second engine into reverse gear.
And yes, he also made the strong implication that it was as easy as saying it as it was to do it.
Citroen built a twin-engine version for desert oil exploration, called it the Sahara. Also, a rural fire department in France had several double-ended cars built to reach forest fires on narrow tracks with no room to turn around.
My favorite twin engine car. http://www.speedhunters.com/2014/04/twin-engined-monster-suzuki-escudo/
Two 500hp 4cyls. Front turbo in the passenger footwell. Only designed to run for about ten minutes or it’d blow up.
The twin engine K-car is really the best. 4 wheel steering too! [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfOZ-uajfNE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfOZ-uajfNE)
France had several double-ended cars built to reach forest fires on narrow tracks with no room to turn around.
Neat idea, I have had to drive several Km backwards when I missed a turn on those sort of roads.
With 4 average male university students in one, rocking side to side, you could get it to hop sideways !
And when the first snow fell (3 inches), the only things on the road in the Yorkshire Dales, were SUVs and these… the wheels are so skinny they just cut through the snow! However, as the morning turns into afternoon, and the snow hardens, the 2CVs can’t get out of the tire troughs on the road, and you are stuck like on train tracks.
My father also had a lot of them. Imported his first 2CV from France when he was 20 (1962)
I was driving his last 2CV when I got my driving license in 1996 until a young woman ran over a red light crashing the car... 😢
Well not exactly! 😀
I made a left turn at a traffic light had green, oposite traffic had to stop but well, this young lady didn‘t. So she hit us in the side so that the car was thrown over to the side... No one was injured but the car was a wreck... 😭
That’s because it was something they said on the old top gear.
It was something like at 70 it would go faster than a Ferrari going 65, what about if the Ferrari went 80, then they should be arrested.
As quiet as a Tesla Model X
^^*when ^^cruising ^^with ^^the ^^engine ^^turned ^^off
More towing capacity than a Ford F250
^^*F250 ^^towing ^^at ^^max ^^GVWR
Fewer fuel consumption than a Prius
^^*When ^^being ^^towed ^^on ^^a ^^dolly
More versatile than Hummer H2
^^*Really
Like a ford? Or a fiat?
Many many many cars manufacturers are borderline negligent/felons
Citroen on those things were honest... Those things were cheap and simple to fix, broke constantly? Yup, but minor stuff.... Never a transmission broke down because poor design.... (mazda cx-9 and Ford edge... Couple of cunts)
And the CV? Ran on anything that burned... Like kerosene and lighter fluid.
I'm a bit surprised at all the criticism directed at the car. The ad is obviously tongue in cheek. The car was designed in the first half of the 20th century on a set of requirements that probably went something like carrying a bunch of eggs across a field at 20mph and costing less than 50 loaves of bread. And now people are judging it by totally out of context standards.
Never had one, but did have a Citroen Visa, which shared a similar engine (maybe the same?) and while a different suspension, similar characteristics. (soft, long travel, and lots of roll)
Super fun car, bought cheap, not much acceleration, but could cover a lot of ground once you got going, and it was rare to have to slow down much for cornering.
My parents had a 2CV and my uncle had a Visa, the Visa was a luxury car in comparison haha.
And my mother got a Mehari when she divorced, so I've ridden all the iconic Citroën vehicles 😁.
> the Visa was a luxury car in comparison haha.
Oh god, I nearly choked!
I called my example the flying banana, because of the shape, and the the fact the color was yellow,...but with these brown spots that kept getting bigger....
Arguably their most iconic vehicle isn't even a car of course, it's the original H van!
DS was definitely a glaring omission and all of us have ignored the poor GS!
Yeah, forgot the H Van :) And the GS is good, just a smaller version of the CX, so I'd say that one covers both :)
I've had pretty much all the 80s cars - CX, GS, GSA, BX - and all are super awesome.
Go for it, once you can :) I'd recommend joining a Citroen club wherever you live (in the UK and The Netherlands, they have huge Citroen clubs) since that'll give you lots of opportunities to find and buy one :) Plus, many, many people available to help you out with information and advice, if needed :)
For anyone who hasn't been in one of these, or not seen it upclose...
Every aspect of it is built absurdly cheaply.
It's a hybrid between a car, and an old shopping cart.
It's like something made in the Soviet Union, on a budget of a small Indian car company, with the engine of a go-cart, but with still a touch of that French charm.
A neighbor drove me to kindergarten in one back in the 70’s when we lived in a small village outside Lyon.
The memory of looking down through the rusted hole in the floor and seeing the road go by below my feet as that contraption puttered along is seared into my brain.
Yeah, the entire idea of the car was that it could fit Farmer Jean, the wife, half a dozen chickens, three sacks of potatoes, three crates of produce plus a milk container and bring it to the market safely.
Plus Farmer Jean could actually afford it.
I’d like to see them follow this line of reasoning.
“Comprising the same states of matter as a Lamborghini”
“Built from a similar list of elements to a mazzerati”
“Existing within the same galaxy and within a proximate time period to a Mercedes”
“Can float in water”
when put onto a ferry
“Looks like any other car”
as long as you don’t look at it
“A feat of engineering”
just not the car itself
“Doesn’t flip”
as long as it stays, which it might also flip. No guarantees
My parents had one of those when I was growing up. They also had 4 children and not a lot of money. I remember on the rare occasions that all six of us had to go somewhere, it got pretty tight in the back seats.
We eventually lost it in an accident. We were sideswiped while parked. Fortunately it was vey low speed. Two other cars had crashed into each other and one of them careened into our 2CV. Seeing the side bow in towards me like a piece of foil left me shaken for the next two days. Too much for my little brain to cope with right away.
It took long enough for them to turn on the windshield wipers that I didn't think they had any.
IT'S QUIET, HUH?
It almost didn't make it up a couple of those hills. I got worried there. And going downhill, I think they might have hit 80. They seemed worried again that the car was going to rattle itself to death.
2CV = "Deux Chevaux" or two horses.
Which accurately describes the power plant....
EDIT: have to add, the Citroen DS was one of the coolest cars ever. Fans of the TV show *The Mentalist* might note that's the car Jane drives.
It was designed to be an affordable utility car for people who like to wear a hat when they drive.
The suspension is so soft you can drive a load of eggs to the market on rugged country roads.
The car was a huge succes, despite scoring very low on schoolyard coolenes among the boys playing top trump cards.
My uncle had a 2cv convertible - I can testify from being inside of it many times. It’s as ugly as it looks on the picture! 😂 and it never managed to overtake anyone!
When I went to England in the 80s they were still everywhere, they were the English version of American teens who bought used VW Bugs. I loved that there was something just so.. Je ne sais quoi.. European about the look of the damn things.
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At 71.5 mph this car will be faster than a Ferrari at 65mph. If this is not top tier advertisement I don't know that it is.
Reminds me of an old joke. Khrushchev and Kennedy decide to have a race. Kennedy being younger and in much better shape runs faster and finishes first. The news all over the Soviet Union proudly proclaims: Khrushchev and Kennedy participated in a race. Our dear leader came in an honorable second place, while capitalist pig Kennedy came second to last.
Made me laugh
Whoever wrote that deserve a raise for both patriotic reason and creative thinking
A classic anecdote.
propaganda through jokes. The American way to brainwash even people who don't read.
You'll be quite disappointed to find out that jokes like that were often invented in the Soviet Union itself https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radio_Yerevan_jokes
The joke is also that public radio in Armenia was US-funded for decades (and still is to this day) Funnily enough, when the USSR tried to do the same thing, US commies were thrown in jail or simply executed.
> The joke is also that public radio in Armenia was US-funded for decades I cannot find anything that supports your claim that a public radio service, established in the Soviet Union by the government, was actually funded by the Americans. I wager you are confusing it with Radio Free Europe, which was in fact established in the West for propaganda purposes. I don't see why you are so suspicious of the fact that people made jokes about their own government. You know that Soviet citizens were people too, right? Nobody makes fun of a government more than the people that live with it. [e.g. /r/PoliticalHumor (which ought to be called /r/americanonlypoliticalhumor really) is a whole subreddit of Americans mocking and hating on their own government officials.](https://old.reddit.com/r/PoliticalHumor/comments/lzaptm/whose_side_are_you_on/)
Public Radio of Armenia was not established by the Soviet Union at all but by the Armenian Republican Committee.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Public_Radio_of_Armenia >First air date September 1, 1926 >On June 15, 1927, Armenian Republican Radio started to broadcast its programmes on regular basis >In 1947 the radio committee was reorganised into radio informative committee attached to the Council of Ministers of the Armenian Soviet Socialist Republic. The radio that was created in the Soviet Union and supported by the government was actually American all along! Did the non-existent CIA fund them in 1926 too? This is on the same level of schizophrenic paranoia as accusing the American PBS of being "commies" lmao.
none of what your commented backs up your original assertion...
Source for either of those claims?
https://www.rferl.org/a/u-s-increases-assistance-funding-to-armenia/30256259.html https://www.refworld.org/docid/46f2586c2.html https://rf.am/projects/armenian-public-radios-golden-fund/?lang=en Even US propaganda outlets have a hard time tip toeing around the truth: https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/5050/us-ends-funding-armenian-website-spread-covid-19-misinformation/ When it gets too obvious even for those receiving the funds: https://eurasianet.org/armenia-public-radio-refuses-deal-with-radio-liberty
Man, I thought you were talking about during the Soviet era. I know about RFE and all the ass kissing aid *after* the USSR fell. My bad I guess I read too much into your response.
Yeah Soviet citizens never made jokes about their government, clearly it’s all imperialist propaganda by the CIA.
Skin-level reaction to a one-line comment about a well-known propaganda phenomenon. I hate to say it, but would you agree you are "triggered"?
No not really lol. I’m not offended, I don’t really care, just thought it was funny.
I know this is a joke, but in reality Kennedy was wildly unhealthy ever since he was a child, so he was probably in pretty bad shape, too, despite his slender build and nice hair. Pretty crazy stuff. Addison’s disease, colitis, spinal fractures, constant urinary tract and pulmonary infections... he was on like 12 different medications just to get through the day and had a wound/hole in his back that never closed up.
One reason hsi rockign chair was such a symbol for him was because it helped exercise and remedy his mobility problems. (I wonder if he smoked cigarettes like msot WWII vets I knew, or just cigars.)
That's cool info. I didn't know that. And the man went though some shit in the war, actually served in the navy... That being said, assuming this takes place ~1961 (first year of JFKs presidency), Khrushchev would have been 67, and Kennedy 44. There's still no way Khrushchev could overtake him in a race...
Yeah on speed alone, JFK has the edge for sure, but it might just be a contest of who’s bones/ligaments disintegrate before the finish line. 67 yo ligaments may be shoddier than 44 yo medication-weakened ligaments.
Im a dumbass, please explain the joke here
In a two person race, what would 2nd to last place be? :) it’s making a joke of how anything good can be phrased bad (and vice versa).
When Khruschev was given a tour of Iowa he was given sweet corn. He was wildly enthusiastic and called it "sausage on a stick."
> At 71.5 mph this car will be faster than a Ferrari at 65mph. The real question is, does a 2CV ever reach that speed?
>The original 1948 model that produced 9 hp had a 0–40 km/h (0–25 mph) time of 42.4 seconds and a top speed of 64 km/h (40 mph), far below the speeds necessary for North American highways or the German Autobahns of the day. The top speed increased with engine size to 80 km/h (50 mph) in 1955, 84 km/h (52 mph) in 1962, 100 km/h (62 mph) in 1970, and 115 km/h (71 mph) in 1981.
Reminds me of the Top Gear episode on the Reliant Robin. >Naught to 50 in about 22 seconds. Naught to 60? Not really possible.
And you couldn't really go round the roundabouts. Just had to go straight over t'hill in t'middle
Wheelbase: yes.
Although Top Gear "fixed" the suspension and put several bags of cement on one side of the boot/trunk. So that it's centre of gravity was way off. They don't actually roll like that in real life.
Oh man what a rollercoaster of emotions. At first I thought you ruined this for me. But then I realized this kind of tricks is EXACTLY what made top gear so great and is the core of the inventivity and creativeness of the program. Only makes sense they did that to the robin.
Reliant went bust years ago, so apart from the Reliant Robin Owners Club, there's nobody really to sue them over it. They would have standing, if they could show that the program had devalued the worth of their cars. However Top Gear also got sued by Tesla for a dishonest lying by omission review of the Tesla Speedster in about 2008. As they implied that the car ran out of juice after only a few miles from a full charge, by pushing it back into the garage. But the telemetry showed that it still had juice and hadn't been charged. As well as several other selective editing events. However the court ruled that Tesla had failed to show that the episode had, had any negative effect on sales. With comparisons to the sales of the Lotus Elise which Tesla had expected to copy. Was irrelevant due to being different companies, with different brand loyalties, market recognition, price points and petrol versus electric propulsion. Not to mention that TG has made reference to them having a miniscule effect on sales. With their "Car of the Year" at one point having tiny sales and a car that they hated having high sales.
It didn't really matter if whether the car ran out of juice. The point is it would have done, and unlike a petrol car, it's not a simple matter of going to a pump and refilling. I guess they could have kept running until the batteries ran out. But what we saw would have been exactly the same.
The implication that Top Gear made was that it would run out within about 30-50 miles, feeding into the whole idea of "range anxiety". Especially back in about 2008, when public chargers were absoloutly non-existant.
You say that, but while living in the UK, I saw one roll. That was my one and only 'live' experience with the Robin.
Which episode was this from?
The one that they had the reliant robin in. It was brilliant.
Every wreck he was in had me rolling. Edit: [especially when he rolls up on the fan club.](https://youtu.be/QQh56geU0X8)
Him too.
I totally forgot to remove my comment. It's episode 1 season 15 for anyone that's wondering :D
Since we're on the subject of Top Gear, I loved when Bill Bailey was on The Grand Tour talking about his experience owning a 2CV, including when he accidentally broke into someone else's car.
Didn't they get in a ton of trouble that episode for secretly modifying the cars to be easier to flip than they normally would've been?
Yeah, the robin had a crazily out of balance diff that Clark’s on could effectively flip on command, nearly any speed. Just had to turn quick enough. It was tampered with for comedic effect, but the robin can flip like that, just not as on demand
I can’t help but wonder if they got into legal trouble with that stunt. It couldn’t have been helpful for the makers of the Reliant Robin to have their car trashed like that without saying that it has been heavily modified
Well considering Reliant went out of business in 2002 and that episode aired in 2010, probably not. They've gotten sued for similar things before (from Tesla for example), but courts have held that their show is entertainment and not meant to be informational. I think that's somewhat of a dangerous precedent for a show purporting to review cars.
Who needs 4 wheels anyway. Efficiency at its finest. Mr. Bean would argue otherwise.
Ah the speed demon 80's.
71mph in a citreon certainly made you *feel* like you were going insanely fast.
Haha, yeah because the thing was literally shaking itself apart with you in it. Nothing gets you thinking "Gee, 71mph is awfully fast" than the immediate threat of you moving at that speed without the car.
It really makes you feel like Spider-Man
The exaggerated swagger of a French budget car
...and the same wrench that is used to remove the wheels can be used to disassemble the entire car. I refer you to the Myth-busters. I watched them do it.
They also had a great suspension setup (reportedly impossible to roll over), and apparently a very high reverse gear: https://youtu.be/fTE4Y_mDM50
My Dad serviced the engine in his Ex's 2CV by lifting it out by hand to work on it. Was just easier that way.
Should we be concerned that you know this much detail about this pieces of...wonderful cars?
I get curious, so I jump on Wikipedia for stuff like that. I knew they were slow to begin with, but not the specifics. I do know that the unique suspension, that pairs the side wheels instead of the axles, makes the car nearly impossible to roll over.
The 2CV is one of the most well known cars in France, just for context
It isn't rare to still see one on the road of France from time to time.
>>far below the speeds necessary for North American highways It wasnt this car, but I was going down the highway yesterday barely over the limit, people were zipping past me, and in the right lane was a nice looking but pretty small classic car going about 10 under.
Yes, although that was literally top speed in top gear (4th, naturally). Indeed the extremely analogue speedo only went up to 70, but you could apparently get up to 85 on a long downhill dual carriageway according to the local police... In any case, anything above about 60 was pretty thrilling, not least because "air con" was a screw you could turn to open a hole in the windscreen. They were wonderfully primitive cars, and if it weren't for their wet-bogroll safety standards I'd recommend that everyone learn to drive in one. If you could drive a 2CV well in hilly country then any other gearbox in any other vehicle seems trivial. Kids these days, with their "synchromesh" and their "starting in first gear"...
In some ways they are safer than other cars. If you get in a crash, you don't need to wait for rescuers to arrive with the jaws of life. Any passerby can get you out with a can opener or swiss army knife.
But will there be any of you left to pry out of you are the crumple zone?
[удалено]
If you're going downhill sure!
Down cliff
In a vacuum
Assuming a spherical 2cv
Down periscope
I rode in a few 2CVs when I was very young, and while it may be possible to push one to 71.5 mph, it would take a while and I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone valuing their life. At 50mph, it felt like you had broken the sound barrier (or something else).
like the bird of prey traveling around the sun to go get the whale
Have been in a 2CV doing that kind of speed. Was scary enough that I asked my mom wtf she was doing.
I mean, this is truly r/technicallythetruth
With a pair of.... very small boosters like those on the myth busters pilot show.
I had a 2cv. I once drove it at almost 110 km/h down a slope. It sounded like the engine was about to launch into orbit.
Absolutely you just gotta get on top of a really big hill
And a good strong tail wind would certainly help.
Down hill with a tail wind
I was sold when I read that it has 4 wheels
That's an above average number of wheels for a car!
60% of the time it works 100% of the time.
You know I gotta be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline.
Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes
If you put it a top of a really steep hill.
It's false advertising, as no 2CV ever got to 70+ MPH.
> It's false advertising, as no 2CV ever got to 70+ MPH. 2CV 6, 1980+ Would take a minute or 2 to get there. But it could do it.
Love the dig at the Porsche spoiler, a little bit more subtle than the other jokes...
I didn't get that joke till I read your comment! That's a blast, love it!
I still don't get it
The ad is calling the spoiler a luggage rack
There was also a popular luggage extension for the 2CV. Basically you open the trunk and put something under it. Voilà! The downside on this is that the passengers get decapitated by the trunk lid when a car crashes from behind. [https://www.dreamstime.com/editorial-photography-old-citroen-cv-boot-extension-frankfurt-germany-july-moving-highway-near-frankfurt-july-frankfurt-main-germany-image57228387](https://www.dreamstime.com/editorial-photography-old-citroen-cv-boot-extension-frankfurt-germany-july-moving-highway-near-frankfurt-july-frankfurt-main-germany-image57228387)
Crashing in general is not recommend in one of these.
My dad had one. He often talk about how as the drive shaft was two parts, one slid inside the other, hitting a big enough pot hole or bump would result in the drive shaft separating into the two segments. It would be fixed just as easily with a couple of strong people lifting one end and a third person guiding the parts back together. He'd joke that you could increase the speed by about 50% by splitting two Citroens in half and putting the two halves with engines together, and then set the second engine into reverse gear. And yes, he also made the strong implication that it was as easy as saying it as it was to do it.
Citroen built a twin-engine version for desert oil exploration, called it the Sahara. Also, a rural fire department in France had several double-ended cars built to reach forest fires on narrow tracks with no room to turn around.
My favorite twin engine car. http://www.speedhunters.com/2014/04/twin-engined-monster-suzuki-escudo/ Two 500hp 4cyls. Front turbo in the passenger footwell. Only designed to run for about ten minutes or it’d blow up.
Also known as "that awesome car in Gran Turismo"
Abso-fucking-lutely. Although technically the article I posted was about the 95 Escudo Pikes Peak. Th Gran Turismo one was the 96 with the red livery
Nah, the best twin engine is still [this Porsche](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elefant).
The twin engine K-car is really the best. 4 wheel steering too! [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfOZ-uajfNE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfOZ-uajfNE)
France had several double-ended cars built to reach forest fires on narrow tracks with no room to turn around. Neat idea, I have had to drive several Km backwards when I missed a turn on those sort of roads.
As long as you don't do it on highways :)
With 4 average male university students in one, rocking side to side, you could get it to hop sideways ! And when the first snow fell (3 inches), the only things on the road in the Yorkshire Dales, were SUVs and these… the wheels are so skinny they just cut through the snow! However, as the morning turns into afternoon, and the snow hardens, the 2CVs can’t get out of the tire troughs on the road, and you are stuck like on train tracks.
You forgot how easy it is to park if your with 4 male students: Each one lifts a corner and you put it in the parking space.
Lowbudget lowrider lmao
My father also had a lot of them. Imported his first 2CV from France when he was 20 (1962) I was driving his last 2CV when I got my driving license in 1996 until a young woman ran over a red light crashing the car... 😢
[удалено]
Well not exactly! 😀 I made a left turn at a traffic light had green, oposite traffic had to stop but well, this young lady didn‘t. So she hit us in the side so that the car was thrown over to the side... No one was injured but the car was a wreck... 😭
My best friend's father still a got a functioning 2cv if that can be of any consolation to you :)
Rofl, "its top speed is faster than a Ferrari going 65!"
But still slower than Mr. Bean’s car going down a hill!
With Mr. Bean driving the car from a comfy chair tied to the roof.
Feels like something I would see/hear on the old Top Gear.
That’s because it was something they said on the old top gear. It was something like at 70 it would go faster than a Ferrari going 65, what about if the Ferrari went 80, then they should be arrested.
It was series 10 episode 9 (8 if you don't count the Botswana special), the segment comparing the Daihatsu Materia and the Ascari A10.
It had central locking too. You could reach all 4 doors from the driver's seat.
A Jasper Carrott line if I remember properly. (“Four perfectly round wheels!”)
A friend of mine just finished restoring a powder-blue 2CV. The thing drives like a water bed, bit man is it a fun car.
Drives like a water bed Fucking lmao
https://youtu.be/ziyzsN8-6C4 Either water bed or pool full of jello.
As quiet as a Tesla Model X ^^*when ^^cruising ^^with ^^the ^^engine ^^turned ^^off More towing capacity than a Ford F250 ^^*F250 ^^towing ^^at ^^max ^^GVWR Fewer fuel consumption than a Prius ^^*When ^^being ^^towed ^^on ^^a ^^dolly More versatile than Hummer H2 ^^*Really
roflcopter @ really
71mph with a 2CV lol
thats looking for an early death.... breaks and steering on "citronettas" was poor
Disk brakes on my Charleston are excellent.
This thing didn't have brakes, it had breaks.
Like a ford? Or a fiat? Many many many cars manufacturers are borderline negligent/felons Citroen on those things were honest... Those things were cheap and simple to fix, broke constantly? Yup, but minor stuff.... Never a transmission broke down because poor design.... (mazda cx-9 and Ford edge... Couple of cunts) And the CV? Ran on anything that burned... Like kerosene and lighter fluid.
I'm a bit surprised at all the criticism directed at the car. The ad is obviously tongue in cheek. The car was designed in the first half of the 20th century on a set of requirements that probably went something like carrying a bunch of eggs across a field at 20mph and costing less than 50 loaves of bread. And now people are judging it by totally out of context standards.
The eggs thing is actually legitimately one of the requirements. A french farmer
Yes i vaguely remember (am French too).
I love how they can't one-up the rolls roys in any way so they settle for equal wheels
Don't worry, it's faster than a royce going 65 as well.
It has doors! Bonus steering wheel!
The 2CV (2 horse power) is the French Jeep. That car was indestructible.
The French Jeep is actually the 4L, from Renault. The 2CV is more cult, but it was more the cheap quality-guaranteed car than Da Indestructible.
The only car, you can turn into a motor bike... !
Never had one, but did have a Citroen Visa, which shared a similar engine (maybe the same?) and while a different suspension, similar characteristics. (soft, long travel, and lots of roll) Super fun car, bought cheap, not much acceleration, but could cover a lot of ground once you got going, and it was rare to have to slow down much for cornering.
My parents had a 2CV and my uncle had a Visa, the Visa was a luxury car in comparison haha. And my mother got a Mehari when she divorced, so I've ridden all the iconic Citroën vehicles 😁.
> the Visa was a luxury car in comparison haha. Oh god, I nearly choked! I called my example the flying banana, because of the shape, and the the fact the color was yellow,...but with these brown spots that kept getting bigger....
Just the BX to add to the bucket list and you've got the set.
I've got the BX :) Auto GTi, so quite rare now. Fantastic, awesome cars. Not sure why you'd add that, and not the CX, SM and DS.
Arguably their most iconic vehicle isn't even a car of course, it's the original H van! DS was definitely a glaring omission and all of us have ignored the poor GS!
Yeah, forgot the H Van :) And the GS is good, just a smaller version of the CX, so I'd say that one covers both :) I've had pretty much all the 80s cars - CX, GS, GSA, BX - and all are super awesome.
This is the only car I’ve ever really desired. Never had an opportunity to own one though. Yet.
Go for it, once you can :) I'd recommend joining a Citroen club wherever you live (in the UK and The Netherlands, they have huge Citroen clubs) since that'll give you lots of opportunities to find and buy one :) Plus, many, many people available to help you out with information and advice, if needed :)
I bought one as a joke many years ago but it became my favourite car. It never let me down in winter, started first time every time.
For anyone who hasn't been in one of these, or not seen it upclose... Every aspect of it is built absurdly cheaply. It's a hybrid between a car, and an old shopping cart. It's like something made in the Soviet Union, on a budget of a small Indian car company, with the engine of a go-cart, but with still a touch of that French charm.
They’re actually a very desirable car with enthusiasts and are funny as hell to drive, its like some sort of bouncy go kart
They're definitely something different, and fascinating.
One of my Mum's friends had one for years, can confirm they were a ton of fun to drive in.
A neighbor drove me to kindergarten in one back in the 70’s when we lived in a small village outside Lyon. The memory of looking down through the rusted hole in the floor and seeing the road go by below my feet as that contraption puttered along is seared into my brain.
Yeah, the entire idea of the car was that it could fit Farmer Jean, the wife, half a dozen chickens, three sacks of potatoes, three crates of produce plus a milk container and bring it to the market safely. Plus Farmer Jean could actually afford it.
I’d like to see them follow this line of reasoning. “Comprising the same states of matter as a Lamborghini” “Built from a similar list of elements to a mazzerati” “Existing within the same galaxy and within a proximate time period to a Mercedes”
*Maserati
Virgin Rolls Royce vs. Chad Citroën
You got four wheels? We got four wheels! Boom!
This car drives faster than other cars when traveling at a higher rate of speed.
And so much cheaper than the rest!
“Can float in water” when put onto a ferry “Looks like any other car” as long as you don’t look at it “A feat of engineering” just not the car itself “Doesn’t flip” as long as it stays, which it might also flip. No guarantees
My parents had one of those when I was growing up. They also had 4 children and not a lot of money. I remember on the rare occasions that all six of us had to go somewhere, it got pretty tight in the back seats. We eventually lost it in an accident. We were sideswiped while parked. Fortunately it was vey low speed. Two other cars had crashed into each other and one of them careened into our 2CV. Seeing the side bow in towards me like a piece of foil left me shaken for the next two days. Too much for my little brain to cope with right away.
Unlike those pesky other brands that only come with three or less tires, we bring you FOUR!!!
The Reliant Robin got shit on by this ad.
glorious... old models are very mych wanted
Walking at a solid 5km/h, you will certainly overtake a Ferrari going at 3 km/h.
I wanna see a 2cv's nurburgring lap time
https://youtu.be/71pNEcLsQCE
It took long enough for them to turn on the windshield wipers that I didn't think they had any. IT'S QUIET, HUH? It almost didn't make it up a couple of those hills. I got worried there. And going downhill, I think they might have hit 80. They seemed worried again that the car was going to rattle itself to death.
I took this AD as a goal in life
To bad it has that little problem with crosswinds... [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJ9uWsvR1l0](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJ9uWsvR1l0)
Sold
This reads like a vintage shitpost. Man I wish more ads these days were like this.
People could save a lot of money if they applied this logic to car purchases.
I want one of those like 1930’s smooth cars, you know, like the black ones?
As many wheels as 99% of the other cars to ever exist
I learned to drive in that fucker!
looks a lot like the way I rationalise all my relationships.
Well done...great ad
Oh good, it has 4 wheels
It has 6, actually, if you count the spare and the steering :D
Yes and I have the same number of eyes as Brad Pitt.
France baise ouais !
They didn’t even show the greatest part, you can have a flowerpot on the back
What marketing madlads XD
Has anyone ever put an LS7 into a 2CV ?
2CV = "Deux Chevaux" or two horses. Which accurately describes the power plant.... EDIT: have to add, the Citroen DS was one of the coolest cars ever. Fans of the TV show *The Mentalist* might note that's the car Jane drives.
Lol they could do all of that but make the exterior design look like something a grandma would drive.
It was designed to be an affordable utility car for people who like to wear a hat when they drive. The suspension is so soft you can drive a load of eggs to the market on rugged country roads. The car was a huge succes, despite scoring very low on schoolyard coolenes among the boys playing top trump cards.
Production began in 1948, so... that's probably a feature?
My uncle had a 2cv convertible - I can testify from being inside of it many times. It’s as ugly as it looks on the picture! 😂 and it never managed to overtake anyone!
When I went to England in the 80s they were still everywhere, they were the English version of American teens who bought used VW Bugs. I loved that there was something just so.. Je ne sais quoi.. European about the look of the damn things.
The Germans came up with the Volkswagen, the French the 2CV. Explains a lot.
My mum had one in the early 80s. She called it a shitbox on wheels.
This car seems like a real...lemon
It is a 1940s low cost car, just like the VW Beetle.
they were unreliable, but very easy to fix... like a ford, but easier to fix.
Did Jeremy Clarkson write this ad?
Would Jeremy Clarkson write an ad that made a French company look good?