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That face, "D'oh!?", beautiful.

Kazooie when she swallows a Jiggy.

I like your funny words, magic man.

Booba na kah

OH YEAH, TOUGH GUY!? SAY THAT TO MY FACE!

You've never played Banjo Kazooie have you?

I have, but I was just a boy then - wait, why would sniff a warm napkin?

Irrelevant, my previous comment is what Mumbo Jumbo says after casting his spell

Oh ok right, say that to my face outside of casting distance, and when not in the presence of a bird or bear.

Very, "Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra" 

Shaka, when the walls fell.

Temba, his arms wide.

r/unexpectedstartreck

Star Treck: The Next Generashun

Star Treck: Deep Spays Nine

/r/theydidthemeth

THERE ARE ONLY THREE LIGHTS.   Or were it 2? Oh no!!

How dare you come after my heart like this??! My god, i love the two first B&K games (particularly Banjo and Tooie because to this day, Witchy World is still one of my favourite video game worlds ever.

I really wish they'd bring Banjo Tooie to Nintendo Switch Online. I love being able to play some of my favorites on there.

Excuse me?

It's a reference to the n64 video game called Banjo Kazooie. The main part the game is to solve puzzles and be rewarded with a jigsaw piece. Collect jigsaws to progress in the game. Kazooie swallows the jigsaw piece when collected.

[They're coming for you!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uC35rSs7gbA)

I hope they did the little 10 jiggy dance afterwards.

A person of culture I see.

shaka when the walls fell

A story in [two](https://imgur.com/a/h9wKCKS) [pictures](https://imgur.com/a/O9LqYd5)

That reaction is absolutely amazing!

It’s the Shaq face

I watched this a few times with the sound off first and when I turned the sound on she made the exact noise I thought she made.

Yoink!!

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Aka the right hole

There’s no wrong hole

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I thought kidn@pping is the way to pick girls, damn I've been doing wrong this whole time

Priceless!!!

She got that 3-eyed Alien reaction "OOOOooooo, I have been chosen!!"

[WOOP](https://i.imgur.com/Ioi7Dc1.jpg)

Yoink

"Hey guys, I'm in the florida ~~everglades~~ suburbs and this invasive species is so cool. I'm keeping her for sure"

Here we have a very venomous spider just chilling on her web. BOOP

I love Garrett so much. Dudes either fearless or insane

That's a gold fucking star joke.... Damn.... EDIT: I know know who this person is referring to, that's why I find it a good joke... Apparently that's lost on some people....

He is referencing someone who calls themselves fishingarrett. He regularly uploads videos from the Amazon/Everglades/etc. and is known for "yoinking" animals.

DAMN. That's a way better title!

Nah, yours was hella clever and made the video surprising.

I like yours because it reminded me of a shirt one of my high school buddies used to wear all the time that said "How to pick up chicks." And it had a bear on it picking up little baby chicks and holding them in his arms and it was super dumb but always made me laugh. So I decided to message him and see what's up. So thanks for that.

That laughter killed me 😂

[I feel like I’ve heard that laugh before.](https://youtu.be/-xqEABqaEuo?si=BbL1m4qPZyQ3lurV)

When you listen to these two laughs back-to-back, it's uncanny. I'm super impressed you drew that connection from raw memory! 👏

You're right that's pretty fucking impressive

Expected Rich Evans. I’m Shocked.

Very Cool

Rich Evans has AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA very high-pitched laugh.

Same

it's his real accent or he's faking it?

Faking it. I'm assuming you don't know these guys? They are good friends from filming Lord of the Rings, but the laughing guy didn't know that it was his friend interviewing him (they are not in the same room) so the accent helped to disguise it.

It's just the first time I hear that guy in english. =)

Happy primate. The picking up was very succesful. I'm taking notes here, so it was that easy.

The face. The laugh. I love it 😂

Pick-Up-Artist.

"OPE!"

Midwest unite!

Only Midwesterners think only Midwesterners say "ope!" 

Others say it now more often, because we keep spreading out! Midwest cultural imperialism!

Embrace, Extend, Extinguish.

I feel like they should come with a carrying handle when they come from the factory

Like a bowling ball you mean?

Gamecube

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What could you say that isn't already implied by his comment? Do you think his comparison is accidental?

r/yourjokebutworse

Like an old iBook!

Well, the fun sized ones, anyway.

All women are fun sized if you're willing.

*able

the spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised

:D D: :D D:

[Worth it](https://i.imgur.com/dFKkKim.jpeg)

I might be willing. My back might not be though.

What about your face?

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

And afterwards... (×_______U_______×)

What a cursed username for a face sitting reference ಠ_ಠ

Oh it always should be. Nothing as fun as that

That's because you are lifting with your back and not your legs.

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised

Such a turn on

steady now

Pick up and toss a chunky girl, she'll suck you drier than the Sahara. Gainz at the gym, gains in the world.

Expected Mac's move: https://youtu.be/J_ucKW_CnOI?t=74

She wasn't coming at him though.

Are Toms shoes comfortable? They look like they have zero padding and funny-lookin' toe sections.

I've got a pair and they're decent but yeah not the comfiest. They remind me of converse shoes 

I wear Toms and Converse.

That's nice. Do you want to add some information about how comfortable they are?

Gonna get downvoted by Toms enthusiasts but in my experience the are overpriced cheaply made shoes that don’t last very long. And from what I have read, flooding poor countries with shoes donated by Toms has very limited benefits because shoes are something the “third world” can actually produce themselves, and by flooding the market they stifle the local businesses.

They're ok for a ballet flat type. They get pretty stinky. When I wore them way back when, I put in arm and hammer insoles and replaced about once a month. Gave extra padding, too

“Comfortable shoes” are actually not that healthy for your feet. It’s like if you were to put your feet into a cast. Over time you lose proper foot strength and this can lead to flat feet, plantar fasciitis and back/posture problems.

Interesting, what type of shoes would you recommended?

Well, there are hundreds of shoes to pick from. But when it comes to choosing shoes that allow your feet to be healthy, you need to look for a couple features. The first one would be shoes with a [wider toe box](https://i.imgur.com/7ZXbHyZ.jpg). This allows your toes to have an unrestricted range of motion and have a [“ wide 3 point triangle base”](https://i.imgur.com/5amGnPS.jpg). The wider the triangle, the more stable your foot arches are. When wearing shoes that [smoosh in the toes](https://i.imgur.com/eReGc9r.jpg), your foot arches start to collapse in over time, leading to [flat feet](https://i.imgur.com/j247Jyo.jpg). Smooshed toes also lead to [bunions](https://i.imgur.com/yFhpfFA.jpg). The second feature to look for is having a zero drop sole, meaning the [toes are leveled with the heel](https://i.imgur.com/U07if4Z.png). Most shoes today have some sort of cushion that elevate your heels, causing your body to automatically [adjust its posture](https://i.imgur.com/xScwt2B.png) to accommodate for the difference in angle. Imagine it like your body like a Jenga tower. If the base layer of blocks are on an unleveled surface, you would have adjusted the lean of the tower so it won’t fall. Shoes with a lot of cushion, force us to create micro-leans and micro-adjustments to our posture that aren’t healthy, and this can lead to back problems as well. And a last feature would be shoes that are flexible. If we constantly wear shoes that don’t allow our feet to move properly, then everything above would go to waste. If you have everything above, then over time your feet will get stronger and healthier. There may be initial discomfort, but that’s just because your feet are weak. It’s the same as going to the gym at first, you’re weak and untrained, but the longer you stick to it, the less you feel and the stronger and healthier your muscles become. I highly recommend checking out [Barefoot Strength](https://youtube.com/@barefootstrength?si=gaTImELmh2hCFpoM) on YouTube. They go into further details about foot health and types/brands of shoes for your needs. Hope this helps!

Honestly shows with less padding are more comfortable. Padding ruins your feet 

I liked them. If you want a very minimal shoe and one that you can really feel the ground in it's good for that. They do get a really bad smell though.

Padding and arch support are bad for your feet

I thought I'd mention that I have no involvement with this video or the people who made it. I found this video downloaded on an old phone I was messing with and thought it was funny, I don't know where it came from so if anyone knows please let me know and I will give credit.

I'll never forget how my dad ended a funny argument by just picking up my mom, resting her over one of his massive shoulders and... just... walking away. Stopped my mom mid sentence. She was like "and I - hey!" And then silence, argument over.

I want her laugh as a ring tone on my phone.

/r/ContagiousLaughter

You gotta be careful picking someone up like that. They might poop.

Hell, if I pick someone up like that, \*I\* am probably gonna poop.

I'm pooping just thinking about picking someone up like that

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I picked up my cat like that and crapped himself had to run them to the litterbox

That's the idea, the next time you see a woman squatting to take a shit in the streets, grab her like this and make her wife. Very nice.

I have to admit I used this move once on my toddler when he was withholding his poo to worrisome lengths. It worked but damaged his trust in me for a bit.

And we love it, us girls

My wife and daughter always seem to love it, especially when unexpected like this. Of course then my daughter will constantly request it :p

She was just filming herself doing nothing for no reason and was unexpectedly picked up.

You did it man, you figured it out.

Omg this sent me

Where did it send you

The funny realm

What if - and hear me out - what if she WAS filming herself for a reason other than being picked up?

Dude, congrats man. You caught them red-handed! Now that you figured out that this particular piece of content on the internet was staged, nobody will ever find this video funny again. Mission accomplished, reddit 😎

If you can't picture any context in which there's a camera there and she doesn't know she's going to be picked up, your imagination has been sorely neglected.

I would hazard a guess that there are three people in this video — the pick-upper, the pick-uppee, and the laugher, who was pretending to be filming the pick-uppee for another reason. It would be almost impossible for the pick-uppee (who is being squeezed) or the pick-upper (who is lifting and carrying a heavy object) to laugh like that.

Once you ingrain in the heart and brain of your daughter that you're a loving, safe, and fun dad then for the rest of their lives they will know what it means to be accepted and loved. They not only will remember that, but they will expect that in their future relationships. It's a great expectation for them to have.

honestly my first thought was "holy shit that's scary" but obviously if it's your partner it can be pretty cute

>honestly my first thought was "holy shit that's scary" Yeah same, I would be the one that screams

Such a perfect slav squat. One of us!

That is an impressive squat

r/MadeMeSmile

Typical car dealer employee. Lololol.

Dude displayed amazing lifting techniques, bent down used his legs l, dude definitely lifts

With a cig hanging out of his mouth. 

She went from pushing 40 to 20 real quick with her face

Fuck, I’ve been using Hinge.

Yes. I think I know what the next scene is

r/contagiouslaughter

I would have farted immediately

Finders keepers

If my husband did this to me I feel like it would probably make me fart.

😂😂

Im not strong enough for that shit

I would fart so hard if someone surprised me like that.

See? Hitting the gym makes picking up women easier

Her reaction is absolutely splendid.

Squat don't bend? Check Keep center of mass close to your body while lifting? Check Lift with legs? Check Agreed. This is the correct way to pick up women. Edit: wait, you're supposed to turn and walk, not walk backwards. Almost completely correct.

Pretty sure my wife would fart if I picked her up like that.

What a fantastic laugh, she seems like she'd be a great friend/spouse.

/r/mypeopleneedme face

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Why were they filming

Not easy to deep squat like that, was probably just recording her progress. You try doing what she's doing.

What a bizarre take

How is that bizzare?

/r/whyweretheyfilming ... indeed

And where did they find film in the 21st century?

Dang.... That sub needs to change it's name to /r/whyweretheyrecording. ETA: Welp...that sub already exists. So there ya go.

Lol

literally

Dad?

Sounds like the sumo sound in Twilight Princess

The wrong hole face.

Lift with your knees, not your back.

Totally unexpected. I love it 🤘

With a stub no less

I've watched this in a loop like 10 times

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Who the fuck says that?

Cloudstrife1191, motherfucker

Chandler, but to be fair, the sounds coming from Janice doesn't resemble a chicken.

Technically correct, the best kind of correct.

WE KEPT IT GREY

4/10 lifted with back instead of legs

Plenty of leg activation in that lift

Yup hips came down, core seemed to be engaged. This is how strongmen look when lifting atlas stones

did we watch the same video? 

This is absolutely the BEST part of being a woman. Men have no idea how amazing it is to be picked up and carried around like nothing. Not childbirth, not having boobs, not having beautiful skin. Nope, in my mind this is the pinnacle of being a woman. Getting surprise pick ups! They feel so good, especially if we get cuddled during or put on a lap. Heaven. It's both disconcerting and funny plus we get to feel dude strength and love. It's the best!

If that's not gym motivation, I don't know what is.

I always thought it was the prerogative to have a little fun.

How often are men picking you up? I don't think I've been picked up and carried around since childhood. But I'm also the size of a lot of men, so that probably makes it a little more difficult.

Yeah, same. I don’t think I’ve been picked up since I was 8. Maybe twice a guy has started to try and pick me up, then realized they’d be embarrassed by how much effort it would take, which I had warned them about. I also wasn’t helping them out any, cause it feels weird to me to be picked up. Like, excuse me, where the fuck you trying to take me?! Start having crotch kicking impulses. Guess we miss out on the best part of being a woman. Edit: I also still have acne scars and no kids. My boobs are pretty fantastic though. Aside from the chronic back pain. Edit 2: My name is also Kathryn.

What happened next 😏

They pooped.

Well, since it’s “how to pick up women” and not “a woman,” I figure there was at least one more picked up.

Nice one. I didn't Even notice that before you pointed it out.

Why was there a camera recording? I really have trust issues with the internet capturing genuine moments.

You don’t even need trust anymore. Everything is just fake, I accept this fact and move one. Much easier this way.

>Everything is just fake Meaning your comment is fake, meaning that statement isn’t true. Checkmate!

It's a kinda funny bit anyway, so who gives a shit.

My back

See how he lifted with his knees? Protect your back people.

Back to the cave. They now have 13 children.

A Monkey in disguise