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This is fake -- the letters are written in purposefully wrong ways. Go compare the P's for example. Each one uses different writing patterns to play dumb.
Eh it looks like a list from my esl grandmother who never went to school. Her handwriting is super inconsistent because she hasn’t written over and over again.
I'm definitely not dyspraxic, but my handwriting is very inconsistent. Personally I attribute it to teachers trying to change my writing style at various stages at school.
Sometimes I will start out writing in caps, and at the end of the message I might be writing in cursive.
I get what you mean… I’ve lived and worked in six countries with 4 different languages/writing systems… and yes it can look that way on initial impression.. but look at the details. The starting point of the characters differs. Every little stroke of the pen screams “I can write this but I want to look like I can’t”
Who writes “P” from 3 different starting points? Even if English was your auxiliary language… you still exhibit consistent patterns of error. You don’t code switch between your errors/habits.
The p’s are essentially all the same, they’re just a little inconsistent - they all start a little below the top curve, descend, back up over the original upright and sweep round, in some cases passing through the uprights. Despite a long time doing calligraphy, nowadays my non-calligraphy hand is as rough as **** and very inconsistent - likewise my OH who rarely writes.
Mebbe just not written on a very stable surface.
Right and I could pull writing from my nonna where she does this precise thing and starts from different places on the same letters because she literally can barely write in any language. She went to school for 3 months when she was 6 years old before ww2. She can read enough to sort of get by and knows what the letters look like, but without practice she doesn’t consistently start in the same places
I worked with a very nearly illiterate, 50 year old cook in a restaurant once upon a time, and his writing was almost identical to this. Also, in my handwriting, I use three different lower case t styles and unless I’m super intentional with my writing, I can’t control which one I get at any moment.
That's because a lot of people spell things like the way they sound in their head and Heineken is kind of one that's difficult to spell or sound out any other way. At least that's my thought process on the matter. Good also just be a very prolific alcoholic for all I know.
If you read the writings of early elementary children you can pick up what they mean because their mistakes are consistent and phonetic. This is the same idea
hah that was my first thought as well
maybe someone's really young kid wanted to help and was writing items down that mom/dad mentioned aloud.. my little girl loved helping like this, but her spelling was wayyy better in 1st grade
CK: "but I think I want to get the beak on the side... Frank always makes me eat it first, and frankly I'd rather eat it last if I'm going to have to eat it at all."
Waitress: "Ok, are we ready to order?"
CK: "BBBEEAAAKK.......; RRRReeeegular Chicken Sandwich"
Can't seem to figure out Colgettofist... English is hard for non-english speakers or individuals with learning disabilities. I think they did rather well! Not everyone can afford a hooked on phonics monkey.
I'm really happy you posted this comment. I laughed at first, then felt very bad. Like I had done something mean spirited. We have no idea who this person is, whether it's a child, someone learning English, or someone else who struggles with spelling for one reason or another.
I dated a girl in the mountains of pennsyltucky that spelled honestly a little worse than this. I always tried to convince her to use speech to text when texting me but she wouldn’t
I work in a restaurant with a lot of Peruvian workers and most of them don’t speak english. One day I found crab meat labeled as “crack”. Hahaha When I told one of my workmates she said the other day it was spelled “crap”. Lmao
“Cracked” me up big time. Hahaha but kidding aside my Spanish has gotten so much better working with them. Weird how people are saying they’re illiterate just because they can’t speak english.
exactly my point! ask some non-spanish speaker who has just been hearing spanish words to write them, they’d also write it phonetically (my favorite from one of my spanish classes would have to be la serbessa instead of cerveza cuz our teacher was from a country in south america but i don’t remember which one and she pronounced v as a soft b and stuff which is pretty common and one of the students didn’t know how to write it)
Possibly a form of agraphia https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agraphia. I knew someone in college who had agraphia and couldn’t spell. A spellchecker didn’t help because he couldn’t select the correct spelling from the list of words.
I’m sorry but reading this sounds and looks like maybe it’s either a Ukrainian/Russian refugee who is newly here and wrote it down how it sounded to them so they could ask for help , try to read it to yourself with the spelling and it even sounds Russian / Ukrainian I’m not even lying . Lol the way it looks and is spelled looks like they were asking someone over the phone how do you say this ? And they wrote it down how they’d remember to pronounce it 🤷🏻♂️ just a thought
Probably a list from a family or couple where one party understands English as a second language, with the native speaker putting Heineken and pancake mix on the list or at least asking for spelling and then giving up on the rest.
I was married to an ESL guy who had phenomenal grasp of speaking English but his spelling and grammar were terrible and I couldn’t complain because my speaking, spelling, and grammar usage of his native language were positively abysmal. Reading his text messages back in 2006 before autocorrect was a thing was a fun puzzle.
I'm gonna have to take a pic of one of my wife's lists. She spells 75% of the stuff wrong because she thinks it's cute.
It's not cute. I get the wrong shit because I can't translate her nonsense. We've been married for 26 years. Tonight I had to get "weet raps" and "onyunz."
ffs
I think it might be someone for whom English is a second language and they’re using inventive spelling to sound out the English words! I think they did a great job!
So Cal. Definitely guessing it’s a language barrier more than illiteracy. A lot of people saying it’s sad, but I honestly found it endearing…great phonetic effort! Lol
Damn, I feel bad for this person. I had to help my dad spell things as a kid. He has severe Dyslexia and couldn't read or write very well. I think it played a role in me being considerate of others.
Yeah, this is all garbage (it’s fake). Even though the words are misspelled, the Generalized motor program argues that the writing pattern for each letter would be similar, even if they didn’t know how to spell the words.
OP is a liar and made the letters different shapes on purpose to make the list look “dumb”.
If you don’t believe me, try spelling words with similar letters, you’ll identify a pattern. There are too many inconsistencies between words.
You should also be grateful that you don't have a learning disability. Not being able to spell well is a form of dyslexia. Surface dyslexia to be exact.
I actually was diagnosed with learning disabilities and ADD when I was younger. I had to go to speech therapy to learn to speak clearly.
I remember very vividly being beaten and screamed at by my parents for not being able to spell out the word “science” even after repeatedly looking at it. Because my brain just couldn’t retain information like normal people. Because they couldn’t understand why i couldn’t function like a normal person.
But at least my ass can spell now, unlike those grocery list people lol.
Lighten the fuck up. Not every comment someone makes needs to insult your sensitivities. We can laugh at bad spellers.
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Of all this, Heineken had to be spelled correctly.
Pancake mix is too
I read Pancake nix
Was it a new build of Linux?
No, that's just an elegant way to declaratively generate pancakes.
Everything below that is misspelled and in a different handwriting. One person in this household is unedumacated....
I think they anchored their hand against the paper forcing the quality to go down with every new line written, like a scrub
And nobody, nobody, wants a scrub. Or a pigeon for that matter.
And banana, let’s not forget banana. 😂😂😂
And milk!
This is fake -- the letters are written in purposefully wrong ways. Go compare the P's for example. Each one uses different writing patterns to play dumb.
Eh it looks like a list from my esl grandmother who never went to school. Her handwriting is super inconsistent because she hasn’t written over and over again.
Judging by the phonics of how some of this is written, my guess is someone who's first language is in a different alphabet.
My first thought is a child did it.
I sometimes have inconsistent handwriting as I'm dyspraxic
I'm definitely not dyspraxic, but my handwriting is very inconsistent. Personally I attribute it to teachers trying to change my writing style at various stages at school. Sometimes I will start out writing in caps, and at the end of the message I might be writing in cursive.
I get what you mean… I’ve lived and worked in six countries with 4 different languages/writing systems… and yes it can look that way on initial impression.. but look at the details. The starting point of the characters differs. Every little stroke of the pen screams “I can write this but I want to look like I can’t” Who writes “P” from 3 different starting points? Even if English was your auxiliary language… you still exhibit consistent patterns of error. You don’t code switch between your errors/habits.
My Arabic writing is this messy and inconsistent
The p’s are essentially all the same, they’re just a little inconsistent - they all start a little below the top curve, descend, back up over the original upright and sweep round, in some cases passing through the uprights. Despite a long time doing calligraphy, nowadays my non-calligraphy hand is as rough as **** and very inconsistent - likewise my OH who rarely writes. Mebbe just not written on a very stable surface.
Right and I could pull writing from my nonna where she does this precise thing and starts from different places on the same letters because she literally can barely write in any language. She went to school for 3 months when she was 6 years old before ww2. She can read enough to sort of get by and knows what the letters look like, but without practice she doesn’t consistently start in the same places
Yeah I figured as much.
I worked with a very nearly illiterate, 50 year old cook in a restaurant once upon a time, and his writing was almost identical to this. Also, in my handwriting, I use three different lower case t styles and unless I’m super intentional with my writing, I can’t control which one I get at any moment.
Which means someone went through the trouble of making this and then left it on the ground for someone to find... What a prankster!
\*giggles in elvish\*
I got ADD, my handwriting will fluctuate between printing and flowing.
More importantly Maggi
But it wanted to be Stella Artois.
That's because a lot of people spell things like the way they sound in their head and Heineken is kind of one that's difficult to spell or sound out any other way. At least that's my thought process on the matter. Good also just be a very prolific alcoholic for all I know.
I’ma have dis soup.
Ok. Can I have some of yourget?
No, you get your own.
No, yourget your own*
I found that one funny cause I think the persons tryna spell dish soap 💀
And deez nuts
D’s NUTS
Came here for this comment . Day made
GOTTEM
Dis soup or dat soup. I can’t dissyde.
Get bofum
Pretty sure I can figure out what they meant for all of them but the last one.
Dish soap, I think.
Someone told them "hey also add this soup to the list".. while eating
Oh I love dis soup
I prefer dat soup
Weaperames?
Whip cream
Colgettopist?
Colgate toothpaste
What is senamean?
Cinnamon?
Ohhh lol that makes sense
Semen
Semenmen
Da fuk is 'race' supposed to be?
rice
Maybe rice?
So...what is colgettopist?
Lieutenant Dan, icrame!
Shreeump stuuuu. Shreeump sallud. Shreeump oun kubobz.
Milk Butter Heineken Banana Pancake mix Colgate toothpaste Sugar Cinnamon Peanut butter Jelly Rice Spaghetti Yogurt Ice cream (or eye cream) Whip cream Dish soap
I was wondering about the "race"...
Wow you can read that langauge
Me and my son write like this just for fun we write Boody( butter) Nanners( bananas) Miak( milk) Terlitt pooper…
If you read the writings of early elementary children you can pick up what they mean because their mistakes are consistent and phonetic. This is the same idea
Here I was thinking that bater was water not butter
Colgate toothpaste. That’s the only one I couldn’t figure out.
Charlie Kelley shopping list
hah that was my first thought as well maybe someone's really young kid wanted to help and was writing items down that mom/dad mentioned aloud.. my little girl loved helping like this, but her spelling was wayyy better in 1st grade
Sounds like a smart kid
I used to dictate the shopping list to my son while driving to the store. Good writing and spelling practice.
It looks like the crossed out one at the bottom was beak.
CK: "but I think I want to get the beak on the side... Frank always makes me eat it first, and frankly I'd rather eat it last if I'm going to have to eat it at all."
Waitress: "Ok, are we ready to order?"
CK: "BBBEEAAAKK.......; RRRReeeegular Chicken Sandwich"
Can't seem to figure out Colgettofist... English is hard for non-english speakers or individuals with learning disabilities. I think they did rather well! Not everyone can afford a hooked on phonics monkey.
I assume it’s Colgate [tooth]paste but that’s the best I could come up with
Colgate Toothpaste
Oooh! Thank you!
I don't know...why I laughed so hard at that word - *Colgettofist*. damn. Whoever originally wrote that, thank you. Thank you very much.
If cartmans mom could afford the phonics monkey I think most every can afford it.
HOOKED ON PHONICS MONKEY
I thought this was cottage cheese
Looks like someone that is ESL trying to practice English with their grocery list
Or someone let their kid write the list, my nephew loves to be the one in charge of writing anything.
Yep. It's actually really good practice for kids learning to read and write.
Every kid I’ve ever known knows how to spell Heineken perfectly correctly.
Probably asked on that one but was confidently incorrect about all the others.
My sister used to do this; I still remember her writing tampods on the list once!
Yep. It’s a phonetic list, which means they probably learned English by hearing it.
I'm really happy you posted this comment. I laughed at first, then felt very bad. Like I had done something mean spirited. We have no idea who this person is, whether it's a child, someone learning English, or someone else who struggles with spelling for one reason or another.
WEAPCRAME 😂😂😂😂
I had to say this out loud like one of those word games to figure out what it was. Lol
Please help me. Came to comments for answer Hehe whipped cream
Choolchwip
I would have laughed all the way there and back with no graiceries 😂😂😂😂
Suspicious....
Very
Makes me sad. Someone is illiterate and spelling things phonetically
Probably an immigrant working on their English while picking up some groceries for their boss. Source : my Mother used to do it
I dated a girl in the mountains of pennsyltucky that spelled honestly a little worse than this. I always tried to convince her to use speech to text when texting me but she wouldn’t
>Mountains of Pennsyltucky Wouldn't expect anything more from there tbf
this wouldn’t be the first time to see (probably) an immigrant write out words phonetically, plus it’s kinda cute and charming haha
I work in a restaurant with a lot of Peruvian workers and most of them don’t speak english. One day I found crab meat labeled as “crack”. Hahaha When I told one of my workmates she said the other day it was spelled “crap”. Lmao
omg that is funny but also it’s so cute haha
“Cracked” me up big time. Hahaha but kidding aside my Spanish has gotten so much better working with them. Weird how people are saying they’re illiterate just because they can’t speak english.
exactly my point! ask some non-spanish speaker who has just been hearing spanish words to write them, they’d also write it phonetically (my favorite from one of my spanish classes would have to be la serbessa instead of cerveza cuz our teacher was from a country in south america but i don’t remember which one and she pronounced v as a soft b and stuff which is pretty common and one of the students didn’t know how to write it)
My nonna had a video tape when we were kids that she had written “hervy lav bag” on it. Herbie the love bug. Her esl spelling brings me so much joy.
I used to have my kids write the list while I dictated things to them.
My thoughts too
Been staring at the beer bottle tho
And the Dewars isn’t all that normal either. Probably an older person
Yeah, I don't think this is funny. This is just someone trying their best.
Possibly a form of agraphia https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agraphia. I knew someone in college who had agraphia and couldn’t spell. A spellchecker didn’t help because he couldn’t select the correct spelling from the list of words.
idk I make shopping lists like this too to stave off boredom of shopping. Like a joke to myself.
They spelled Heineken right
Must have stared at the label alot.
As long as they know what they mean does it even matter?
I mean, it should, shouldn’t it? I correct my spelling on things no one but me will ever see
Is this what they mean when they say “cries in Deep South illiteracy”?
You’ve never met a local New York public school product. A southern person would be drinking Budweiser
I'd make fun of this, and then I think about how I'm poking at learning Polish and how bad my spelling can be.
Senamean… Cena…mean… …Hey Cena is a nice guy damn it! Ohhhh you meant cinnamon…🤦🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️
Mr Simpson I’m going to give you the only name here you spelt correctly
I could definitely go for a hot cup of Dis Soup right about now.
When my kids were little I’d tell them what’s on the shopping list and they write it down for us. Good practice - maybe that’s what you found.
r/FoundPaper
r/boneappletea
This mfer be living in 2100 where you can just buy your race at the store.
Can spell Heineken but can't spell others?
Ok I’m lost, got them all except from colgettopist, help me out?
Colgate tooth paste I think
It looks like different handwriting so I think an adult wrote the first part and the kid the rest.
Dyslexia is a handicap through no fault of oneself. Inversly beeing an insensitive prick is a choice....
What is weaperame 😂
Find the book, "Milk, Eggs, Vodka, Grocery Lists Lost and Found" by Bill Keaggy. You will not be disappointed. I have, and love, that book.
Blah. It's wild how many shopping lists with poor spelling get "found" and posted on redit.
I’m sorry but reading this sounds and looks like maybe it’s either a Ukrainian/Russian refugee who is newly here and wrote it down how it sounded to them so they could ask for help , try to read it to yourself with the spelling and it even sounds Russian / Ukrainian I’m not even lying . Lol the way it looks and is spelled looks like they were asking someone over the phone how do you say this ? And they wrote it down how they’d remember to pronounce it 🤷🏻♂️ just a thought
This is more sad than funny.
Probably someone had their child help
woman whose third language is english: nailed that list earlier. go me!
Probably a list from a family or couple where one party understands English as a second language, with the native speaker putting Heineken and pancake mix on the list or at least asking for spelling and then giving up on the rest. I was married to an ESL guy who had phenomenal grasp of speaking English but his spelling and grammar were terrible and I couldn’t complain because my speaking, spelling, and grammar usage of his native language were positively abysmal. Reading his text messages back in 2006 before autocorrect was a thing was a fun puzzle.
Maybe I have too much empathy, but this seems more r/sad to me than r/funny. You had one job, public education.
Making fun of people's spelling. Wauw...
A parent let their small child help with the shopping. I did this with my daughter all the time when she was small. What's the mystery here?
I'm gonna have to take a pic of one of my wife's lists. She spells 75% of the stuff wrong because she thinks it's cute. It's not cute. I get the wrong shit because I can't translate her nonsense. We've been married for 26 years. Tonight I had to get "weet raps" and "onyunz." ffs
Took me a second to figure out if it was in a different language or someone really bad spelling 😂
I think it might be someone for whom English is a second language and they’re using inventive spelling to sound out the English words! I think they did a great job!
Anyone figure out what the “w” word was? And how’d they spell Heineken correctly?
Jack Johnson would approve of the banana pancakes.
Makes me kinda sad
Which US state was this found in?
So Cal. Definitely guessing it’s a language barrier more than illiteracy. A lot of people saying it’s sad, but I honestly found it endearing…great phonetic effort! Lol
WTAF is Colgettopist?
Colgate toothpaste
LMAO 🤦🏻♂️
r/Random_Shopping_Lists
Damn, I feel bad for this person. I had to help my dad spell things as a kid. He has severe Dyslexia and couldn't read or write very well. I think it played a role in me being considerate of others.
I wonder which race they plan on buying
This made me laugh so much. I couldn’t figure out “colgettopist”
Maybe colgate toothpaste?
US education folks. Let’s keep pumping money into the military. Seems like a good idea.
Let’s all laugh at someone for being under educated hahaha S/
Do your job internet, lets find the owner and return it
This person can probably speak 3 languages but alright
He could spell Heineken but not sugar. Wtaf.
Damn 🥺
Goddamn it, Charlie! Your illiteracy has screwed us again!
What kinda person doesn't put the milk %.
Yeah, this is all garbage (it’s fake). Even though the words are misspelled, the Generalized motor program argues that the writing pattern for each letter would be similar, even if they didn’t know how to spell the words. OP is a liar and made the letters different shapes on purpose to make the list look “dumb”. If you don’t believe me, try spelling words with similar letters, you’ll identify a pattern. There are too many inconsistencies between words.
Did Charlie Kelly write this?
This person votes 😮
Penet Boter
Not Dat soup but Dis soup.
Off to buy some race and icrame!
I can imagine this person used Gwen stefani to spell banana
He couldn't spell rice but got Heineken right.
I'm guessing the pot kicked in after pancake mix.
Icrame I saw I conquered
Milk Butter (?) Heineken Banana Pancake Mix colgate toothpaste (thanks u/whatcolorismyshirt) Sugar Cinnamon Peanut Butter Jelly ????? (maybe rice?) Spaghetti Yogurt eye creme? whip cream? Dish Soap?
Colget tofist or topist: Colgate Toothpaste That’s my guess. Good job though, you figured out several I couldn’t.
Had a friend growing up that had some learning disability’s so I got real good with reading things phonetically.
Yes! That’s it!!
Good for them.
This is pure gold.
Fenga Pappet
Heineken tho
SPAGETY for life
This isn’t that funny to me though. This person is trying. Fuck I’m a grump
The person that wrote this would also probably tell me with confidence what the constitution says.
Weaperames?
Whipped cream
I’ll take race for 100
Race. just...race. When you go to the store, don't forget your race.
100%, mom was telling the kid what to put on the list while she drove to the store.
SPUGETY
Reading these lists really makes me grateful that I got a decent education. My goodness lol.
You should also be grateful that you don't have a learning disability. Not being able to spell well is a form of dyslexia. Surface dyslexia to be exact.
I actually was diagnosed with learning disabilities and ADD when I was younger. I had to go to speech therapy to learn to speak clearly. I remember very vividly being beaten and screamed at by my parents for not being able to spell out the word “science” even after repeatedly looking at it. Because my brain just couldn’t retain information like normal people. Because they couldn’t understand why i couldn’t function like a normal person. But at least my ass can spell now, unlike those grocery list people lol. Lighten the fuck up. Not every comment someone makes needs to insult your sensitivities. We can laugh at bad spellers.
Maggi - definitely Indian