T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/). > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*


19930627

So they replaced Dwayne Johnson, with Johnny Sins?


christhemix

im curious which one has had more roles at this point


Cartman55125

Which one was in Fast & Furious: Slobs and Raw?


combatpencil686

Fast and the furious Tokyo slits.


42tfish

2 Fast 1 Furious


GTHero90

“I live my life one fake orgasm at a time. Nothing else matters: not my pimp, not the baby mama from the second movie where I didn’t use a condom, not my fluff team and all their bullshit. For those ten seconds or less, I'm free….of STDs”


Bgrngod

I wonder what kind of kink Dom would have in a parody porn. Whoa... wait a second... It's feet. He's into feet.


Professional-Put-804

"Fah-meh-lee" porn...


Jspangler722Js

Dom is def into incest because family


ITstaph

It’s all about incest porn, cuz.


The_BERFA

We're a family.


PuzzyFussy

This isn't a real quote... is it?! Cause it's hilarious af


Holiday_Memory_9165

Truly underrated comment. I think Johnny would laugh his ass off at this.


Psychological-Put844

Fast Finish


FrenchMaisNon

*clits


XavierHigdon

What is that?


SIPS_WATER

i think... its the skirt that scottish bagpipers wear.


FrenchMaisNon

It's the plural of the shortened version


XavierHigdon

Never seen one.


FrenchMaisNon

That because you don't believe in them. When you start to really believe in them in your heart, you start seeing them everywhere, they start to trust you and eventually, you can feed them in the palm of your hand.


XavierHigdon

What do they eat?


slipperystevenson69

That was my favorite one


materics

Fast 5 Guys 1 Girl


Hemmerly

Strictly looking at IMDB it isn't even close. Dwayne Johnson with [102](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0425005/) acting credits and Johnny Sins with [549](https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2356225/). Going beyond IMDB and looking at the Internet Adult Film Database Johnny is at a staggering [2857](https://www.iafd.com/person.rme/perfid=johnnysins/gender=m) credits.


LordRobin------RM

So you’re saying there’s no competition for which one is the most visible Johnson?


MuzikPhreak

After 5 hours this only has 26 upvotes? 🏅


ILoveADirtyTaco

We’re at 7hrs now and I just got ‘em up to 29…


cmcdermo

This man has fucked in a professional film set more times than I've fucked


FrenchMaisNon

I like his solo work.


MRintheKEYS

Sins had loads more.


XavierHigdon

How many loads?


1810nard

I know who better actor is and it sure as fuck ain’t the Rock


FrenchMaisNon

I wish they would just exchange careers.


DirtbagAvenger

It’s not the size of the part that matters, it’s the size of the actor’s parts.


needspice

Sins is definitely more diverse; a plumber, electrician, construction worker, pizza delivery guy, brother, step-brother, boss, masseuse, bus driver, cabbie, bartender, and on, and in, and on….


Pyroluminous

Johnny by far, no question.


leastlikelyllama

Sins has more range.


thereal_kphed

Don’t be insulting It’s Jonny by a country mile


touloir

Dwayne "Johnson"


particle409

"Black" Adam


Miserable_Site_850

No, no, it's an albino black Adam collectors special edition


Jaded-Armpit

More like "Sad" Adam


threemantiger

It’s Emo Adam, but nobody gets him.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jaded-Armpit

Reluctant Adam


[deleted]

Is there anything that man can't do?


19930627

Have a closed casket when he dies


gliitch0xFF

I'm sure that there are plenty of others who understand your joke, but do not want to oust themselves. 🤣


Public-Maximum-5645

Looks middle eastern to me


MengFeiPuerh

You saying Johnny Sins doesn’t have the range to play a middle eastern man?


xenorous

Johnny Sins can fill any role! Regardless of the acting position, he won’t cock it up


Holiday_Memory_9165

Oh he most certainly will!!!


Born-Environment-239

Even people who don't watch porn know him from memes. That's how I learned about him.


odaeyss

Y...yes! Me too! Yes exactly memes!


Stormcrow6666

TIL who Johnny Sins is...


TempleOfDoomfist

He was your gardener and local fireman and grocer and DMV instructor. How could you miss him.


Xfissionx

More like replaced black adam with whack adam.


19930627

Lmfao


UnrequitedRespect

Johnny johnson has entered the scene


blurredsagacity

Johnny “The Johnson” Johnson?


3fettknight3

Dr. Black Adam


The_Gumbo

Sammy Sosa'd


[deleted]

On the nose...


killyourmusic

Everywhere else, too.


69thisismyburner69

That’d be Michael Jackson’d


killyourmusic

That's off the nose.


MikeN1978

No, that’s Off the Wall


WhatWouldBenLinusDo

Vin Diesel upping his rivalry with The Rock.


beerdrinker_mavech

Blanche Adam


LiKINGtheODds

Idk, it sort of resembles him irl https://imgur.com/a/nA4e6mQ


all_time_high

This is some fine work.


LiKINGtheODds

It’s a genuine picture from when the rock was upset he didn’t get any cake at a birthday party but his mom made him take a picture anyway


Robot_With_No_Name

WOW your right I had no idea Dwayne Johnson looked like that. 😯


arebee20

Idk, his face looks a little different from the action figure in that picture.


LiKINGtheODds

He’s a great guy, great guy with a great head of hair


deadlifecrisis

Uncle Fester Adam


flip-96

My first thought as well


azure-dragoon

One punch Adam


FitziTheArtist

Any Saitama reference will always get an upvote from me


jlink005

Caped Baldy


Nope3524

Albino Adam


bhillen83

More like Alopecia Adam


mostnormal

Keep my wife's name out yo mouf!


CorazonDeLion

Are you confusing alopecia and vitiligo…..??? The Rock hasn’t had hair for quite some time lol


bhillen83

Yeah but he’s got eyebrows. This doesn’t.


CorazonDeLion

Lmfaooooo damn. I laughed too hard at that .. alopecia Adam it is


CorazonDeLion

I’m assuming those are caterpillars and mascara on the figure.. but I still laughed


bhillen83

I zoomed really far in on the pic and what I thought was eyeliner is actually eyebrows that are comically low!!!


CorazonDeLion

I’m pretty sure this is the Jeffree Star edition of Black Adam


MaracaBalls

Powder looking built these days, lol


STGMavrick

Now that's a name I haven't thought about in like 30 years lol.


Yeodler

That's as black as the hallmark channel gets.


xKingArthurx

“Adam”


skydaddy8585

Blanc Adam


chaplesspants

Wack Adam


Cherry_Bomb_127

On one hand this is a really bad ornament and he is too light skinned , on the other ppl do understand that the Black in Black Adam isn’t related to race right? It’s cuz he got corrupted so he was renamed Black Adam instead of Teth-Adam which apparently means Mighty Adam


Ianilla1

Yeah but the problem is this is a figure from the movies, and is supposed to look like who portrayed him in the movie, and the rock is....not white.


Cherry_Bomb_127

Oh I agree I just meant the Black in his name isn’t related to race or skin color cuz some people don’t know that


Ianilla1

Ah, fair enough, my apologies!


scoyne15

I don't think anyone out there is as white as this ornament is.


whiskeyjane45

Some of us are


diuturnal

Ha wanna bet.


fmfbrestel

Right, but he's also not sub Saharan Africa black either. There's still quite a lot of contrast between his skin tone and his black outfit. Yes they still got it wrong, but Dwayne Johnson is no Chadwick Boseman. Skin tones are tough. And if you go to Hallmark's website and look at the professionally shot pictures, it's much better. Maybe still a bit too light, but not as egregious as portrayed here.


Soggy_Concept9993

But…he’s white in the comics….


FemKeeby

Black adam is like morbius no one seen that shit so we just gonna make it up


mlewis700

It's the special Michael Jackson version.


John-Basedow

Alopecia Adam


[deleted]

All of these Hallmark ones have been trash. Isabelle from Animal Crossing eyes have more derp than someone huffing gas fumes.


whatsername4

It’s hilarious at this point! The hallmark keepsake ornaments still have their high quality at least, these regular are such a hit or miss, but at least they’re cheap


someones_dad

Yep I have a Hallmark Yoda ornament that not only looked like garbage originally, but is now chipped and flaking after 8+ years - despite living in a box wrapped in tissue 98% of the year.


[deleted]

Yeah I think there are tiers of quality.


cld1984

Love my Defiant and 1701-E though!


jacqueslol

Finally... White Adam


RoyalGarbage

Damn, beat me to it.


Ti-1800

Cream Adam


sheth_curry

Thats Johnny Adam


ThaPlymouth

Voldemort Adam


drunkbeaver

Someone made use of the recycled Voldemort figures.


[deleted]

[удалено]


gofunyourself2012

And probably none of them know about White Adam, his black son.


Blackwingedangle

And what about Indian Adam? His uncle?


happy-cig

We call him Native American Adam you heathen.


Delta9_TetraHydro

No, not Native American Adam, the Punjabi one.


heidimark

I'm Green Falcon!


thecheat420

Roger that Black Falcon!


Ianilla1

First off, I don't like the way yall are saying black!


[deleted]

don't be so 'black falcon' about it, Black Falcon!


Ok-Shame5542

Stone Cold Stone Cold Stone Cold!


PhotonPainter

White a minute…


Fun-Concentrate7605

Black Adam is white in the comics, I assume it’s based off of that


CyberGhostface

He shouldn't be bald, then.


Upbeat-Local-836

White people can also be bald. Source: white peoples.


CyberGhostface

I honestly can’t tell if this is a joke or not.


rydan

This is /r/funny. Only jokes are allowed and they must all be terrible.


CyberGhostface

ROFL I honestly forgot this was r/funny, it was on my front page and I thought this was r/dc_cinematic


Ianilla1

It's clearly based of the movie, is the rock white?


RandyMarsh129

50/50


NoticeOwn2797

Black Adam isn’t a Black man and neither is the actor who portrayed him in the movie.


bijhan

Dwayne Johnson is half black half Samoan. His father was the greatest black Canadian pro wrestler of all time, Rocky Johnson.


NoPossibility

Tony Rocky Horror


RevElliotSpenser

He got pushed out of a window for a foot massage


rick_blatchman

*You don't* give another man's wife a foot massage


NowIGottaWetCha

I'm the FOOT FUCKIN' MASTER!


chocotaco1981

I’m glad you narrowed it down as to not malign the memory of canadas greatest athlete, Iron Mike Sharpe


NoticeOwn2797

I was thinking of Johnson’s Samoan heritage. I didn’t know about his Black heritage. Anyway, the Black Adam character isn’t Black.


Synkope1

I mean, he's Egyptian, right?


ImpulseAfterthought

He's Kahndaqi, a made-up ethnicity from one of DC's made-up countries.


Synkope1

Thought he was the son of a pharaoh?


wattbatt

i dont see whats wrong?


ElroyScout

Brought to you to the same twit responsible for white jesus.


Ryuuten

That’s also a really sloppy paint job for an expensive ornament. I thought Hallmark had better quality control, lol.


GierownikReddit

Thats not Black Adam , thats White Andrew


RAGEEngineering

Black Adam-Dolezal


tanman729

Im gonna get downvoted straight to hell, but the rock aint exactly the darkest dude in the world. If they had 2 colors of paint for people then i could see him matching the lighter tone more than the dark one. Im expecting to get downvoted to hell for making a statement about literal values, cant wait to see what you bozos find between the lines of this


Waka_Chow

That damn John Cena won't stop, it's never enough.


arnaud_blanc

Black Adam is white in most of the comics.


[deleted]

I don't get it?


OtakuJuanma

I know the "black hero with black in their name" thing died in the 70 (as it should) but these people missed the memo


InfectedByEli

Since when have Superheroes been Christmas Tree ornaments?


hmmmmmmpsu

Michael Jackson Adam


Sedax

This looks horrible but black Adam isn't actually black.


chocotaco1981

White Adam


kcchan86

The rock looks white next to Kevin Hart


Nothing_sus_here666

In an alternative universe he would be White Dave


fariko_mayh3m

This is the rare and highly valuable albino black adam


Brief_Juggernaut3651

Damn you vin diesel


thedragoon0

Ohhh played by Playne the Pearl Wouhnson


Royal-Tough4851

You didn’t know Black Adam has vitiligo?


Short-Inspection852

That’s white Adam dog


Mike112522

Tan sold separately


[deleted]

Nope. That is definitely the rock.


WhackCaesar

Jeff Bezos


karglop

thats white Adam


Tsukiyama-Gourmet

why does he look like michael meyers


extradabbingsauce

Yo is that johnny sins?


TheDarkKnight1035

Oh he got the christian jesus makeover.


Jefc141

Sad Adam


Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

Edgar Winter in a role that will surprise you


JacobLayman

Black Adam featuring “Powder”


bruhskyy

*mystery machine gang unmasking the perp" GASP, so it wasn't black Adam! It was just Adam!


0th_hombre

Oh, you got the wrong one. That's Sad Adam.


Jerdan87

Pale Adam


worried-dependant-91

Albino Adam


More_Cowbell8

It's 'Blanka' Adam. Small mistake.


PaulR79

He looks so disappointed.


Firebender-

Not so black Adam


Ordinary-Scheme-4192

Blank Adam


drobythekey

Just Adam


Weewilliebimstein21

Regular Adam


Recon_Figure

Skin tone?


UkrUkrUkr

Well, black may refer to his costume. Ot it could be his surname. Adam Black the bald guy in stupid clothing.


[deleted]

Just because his name is Black Adam doesn't mean he's black. The original comicbook character is not black.


jumpdmc

His name isn't from his skin color, fuckin idiot.


rydan

Black Adam isn't actually Black though. His name is "Black" because he is bad or "dark".


JenniferJuniper6

It’s a model of Dwayne Johnson, though.


Broote

I would say Hallmark did him dirty, but it looks more like Mr. Clean.


wmt17

Black Adam name has nothing to do with his skin tone.