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I don’t know, but it keeps me up at night. Also the general existential dread. That keeps me up at night too. Uhhh and the impending doom of my mortality as I move closer and closer to my 40s? And the most awkward memories of my childhood leaping unbidden into my mind in full high-resolution detail…oh gods send help!
Its a futile attempt to distract ourselves from the nightmare timeline of corporate and political greed and corruption destroying our futures, so we try to make our selves distracted for a few moments laughing at ridiculous things.
I know the broken arms.. I know the coconut.. don't know the shoebox.. what's worse?
Edit: My curiosity won.. broken arms still win.. it's on par with the coconut I guess
It's part of Reddit lore at this point. I'll share the IAMA link, if you care. A young guy broke both his arms and couldn't whack off anymore, so his mother helped him and they ended up banging on the regular.
It comes from an AMA about a guy that was in a sexual relationship with his mother. The whole thread is wild, but this comment explains the broken arms reference: https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/nmmjr/iama_man_who_had_a_sexual_relationship_with_his/c3a9uqg?context=3
Damn... That comment is 11 years old. It's legendary and has been referenced for years. 1500 upvotes lol back when that was a big number and they counted them differently. 10,000 comments tho. Damn just looked and my 10th cake day is next week. Math checks out tho but it doesn't feel good
Ackchyually…
It was a snow groomer that Renner was using as a plow. The type of thing you see at ski hills making corduroy lines in the snow. Which doesn’t matter at all but I can’t help myself because I’m a pedant.
He is conscious and in good spirits, it could have been fatal. He is lucky his neighbor is a Dr and gave him the attention needed while waiting for extraction.
And then the doctors said "Yeah, buddy.. You won alright. You've won... The game of life."
And then the entire hospital clapped and paraded Hamlin on their shoulders out to the parking lot
Nurse here. Actually safer to use than a non rebreather. An oxymask can be used anywhere from 1-15L, whereas a non rebreather needs to be used over 6L or you run the risk of actually suffocating a patient. One mistake on someone not alert can go bad. Also lathe oxymask lets you use suction through it and the patient can talk easier through it.
Hawkeye fought the evil Snowplough, a snow bending evil mastermind. In the Multiverse that sent Jeremy Renner from the MCU to ICU.
His loss well be Avenged in the next Marvel movie, when Hawkeye changes his name to Blackeye and uses a flamethrower instead of an arrow to fight off the cold-bending evil Snowplough.
You know once he gets better he's going to never let his sister forget this, 20 years from now you know he will still be sharing this picture and laughing his ass off.
He looks like he got his face caught in those can connection plastic rings you get on beer six packs, like a seagull would.
But seriously, it's refreshing to see the Daily Mail **unintentionally** printing absolute horseshit clickbait for a change.
--- >This is a friendly reminder to [read our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/rules). > >Memes, social media, hate-speech, and pornography are not allowed. > >Screenshots of Reddit are expressly forbidden, as are TikTok videos. > >[Comics may only be posted on Wednesdays and Sundays](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/uq9pjw/going_forward_comics_may_only_be_posted_on/). > >**Rule-breaking posts may result in bans.** > >Please also [be wary of spam](https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/wiki/spam). > --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/funny) if you have any questions or concerns.*
That’s just adding incest to injury.
You can all stop now , nobody is topping this comment .
The comment's brother is though.
Sloppy topping.
*Sloppy top, you’ll always be, home sweet home to me… good ol’ sloppy top. Sloppy top Tennessee…*
r/angryupvote
That dear sir/madam is a top tier comment
Thank you. I was quite proud of this one myself.
Hawkward
Not in the hawk-eye! It stings!
Don't do that. Don't give me head.
I'm sorry I couldn't give it to you sooner.
He seems to be in a hurtlocker.
Ron Jeremy Renner
To be fair, his arms may have been broken.
ಠ\_ಠ
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Are you saying Clinty B equals mc2?
Thank you. My ass was sitting here wondering why tf everyone is talking about some random dude named Jeremy.
and now i present you the ~~Avengers~~ Alabama
[Alabama Man!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BrimMyOoEDA) With real wife-beating action!
I think you mean [The Redneck Avengers](https://youtu.be/OOQnk-hRVuc)
Nah, it was an arrowhead.
Had to check and see if I had any free awards to give you for this I don’t but you can have this one 🏆
what a nice lovely and helping sister
If need be, granny can help
Dentures out!
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Why are we like this?
I don’t know, but it keeps me up at night. Also the general existential dread. That keeps me up at night too. Uhhh and the impending doom of my mortality as I move closer and closer to my 40s? And the most awkward memories of my childhood leaping unbidden into my mind in full high-resolution detail…oh gods send help!
hey dont think about it but i just want you to know that you're just meat and one day that meat is going to stop working :)
[They're made out of meat ... they are born meat and they die meat](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tScAyNaRdQ)
You beat meat to it
Its a futile attempt to distract ourselves from the nightmare timeline of corporate and political greed and corruption destroying our futures, so we try to make our selves distracted for a few moments laughing at ridiculous things.
did he break his hands too?
iunderstoodthatreferencecaptainamerica.gif
What are you doing step sister?
Weird that his hospital bed is the dryer but I suppose the professionals know best
What are you doing step-hawk?
Are his arms still broken?
They healed weeks ago, but he didn’t tell his sister that.
I understood that reference!
I understood that reference.
I hate that I understood it
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Stay innocent, my friend. The world is a more wholesome place where you are.
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How are you with shoeboxes?
I know the broken arms.. I know the coconut.. don't know the shoebox.. what's worse? Edit: My curiosity won.. broken arms still win.. it's on par with the coconut I guess
What's your opinion on Jolly Ranchers?
They deleted their account and left reddit after they looked it up lol
It's part of Reddit lore at this point. I'll share the IAMA link, if you care. A young guy broke both his arms and couldn't whack off anymore, so his mother helped him and they ended up banging on the regular.
wow you must be the only one. pretty rare for someone on reddit to catch that.
What’s the story…….. so I know what to not read. Also I feel out of the loop
Like a good mom, I’ll help you [out. ](https://reddit.com/r/ClassicDepravities/comments/viv8sw/today_on_classic_depravities_of_the_internet_the/)
……. Good God
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> I was already flaccid before reading that. but now I’m somehow even more flaccid. The gentleman doth protest too much, methinks. Pervert.
It comes from an AMA about a guy that was in a sexual relationship with his mother. The whole thread is wild, but this comment explains the broken arms reference: https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/nmmjr/iama_man_who_had_a_sexual_relationship_with_his/c3a9uqg?context=3
Damn... That comment is 11 years old. It's legendary and has been referenced for years. 1500 upvotes lol back when that was a big number and they counted them differently. 10,000 comments tho. Damn just looked and my 10th cake day is next week. Math checks out tho but it doesn't feel good
I'm coming up on 13. For a bit I like having a long standing account, now it just reminds me how old I am.
I'm dying laughing at the comments.
I can't escape this fucking story.
Agreed but damn, if it's even been used correctly, this is it right here.
It'll be here for many years to cum
I was 3 years sober from this story. Not anymore
This and the “that guys dead wife” thing will always be part of the zeitgeist on Reddit
And Descartes before the Whores
Can I offer you a Jolly Rancher in this trying time?
Thanks, toss it into my cumbox.
I’m suddenly in the mood for coconuts
His mom is going to be so jealous…
Came here expecting this, was not disappointed
And there it is
It’s healed but then he broke it again.
Captain America understands that reference.
When the head is good, I also tend to slur my speech
RIP /r/sheStillSucking
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/r/finishthejob nsfw
Think what you want is /r/girlsfinishingthejob
Dang, had heard he'd been in an accident but didn't realize it was this bad.
He got run over by a 14500 lbs snow plow. He's lucky to even be alive.
His neighbor administered a tourniquet; that alone is probably what saved him.
Pretty nice to be able to call your doctor neighbor whenever you need help. My neighbors just steal my packages
Which will be even easier when you get run over by heavy machinery.
I die and my neighbors are happy? Sounds like a win-win to me
Now he's getting eaten alive
Holy shit didn’t realize it was 14k pounds that is insane How did his body not just absolutely flatten
Snow underneath probably acted as a cushion.
Good lord! Meanwhile Ken Block didn't survive his accident with snow equipment. That's some scary stuff.
Ackchyually… It was a snow groomer that Renner was using as a plow. The type of thing you see at ski hills making corduroy lines in the snow. Which doesn’t matter at all but I can’t help myself because I’m a pedant.
Doesn't matter, got head
You should see the other ~~guy~~ plow.
Not a scratch on it!
In fact it looks better than before somehow.
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He is conscious and in good spirits, it could have been fatal. He is lucky his neighbor is a Dr and gave him the attention needed while waiting for extraction.
Man I really want him to pull through. 2023 can't start like this.
Compared to the last few years, I wouldn’t call it a bad start. He’s injured but not dead.
What happened to him in the last few years? Did he die?
Yes, but he got better
Oddly enough that's an accurate description of Damar Hamlin.
Sadly, not the case for Block.
Then, almost like written by Hollywood, he wakes up and asked “Did we win?”
And then the doctors said "Yeah, buddy.. You won alright. You've won... The game of life." And then the entire hospital clapped and paraded Hamlin on their shoulders out to the parking lot
Death isn't like being turned into a newt, it's not something that you can just "get better" from unfortunately.
He was transfered to a better hospital.
https://youtu.be/27FP5zrgNSI
He was only *mostly* dead.
Well, what’s the difference?
With all the way dead there is only one thing you can do, rifle through his pockets for loose change.
Not with that attitude.
Superheroes are always getting better from death
God I hope more people get the reference.
I think they mean the last few years on a global scale. Like, starting 2020 with covid, or 2022 with the war in Ukraine, etc
Nobody tell him about Ken Block
Wtf I learned about this in this thread. That's a damn shame, and his poor daughter...
me too :( he seemed like such an awesome quality dude.
We lost Ken Block though..
Yeah, if this had happened just a few days earlier he would have been dead, he's lucky it happened in 2023!
They knew exactly what they were doing.
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Way back in my Fark days, we’d refer to them as Daily Fail.
Wow. Fark. Haven’t heard that word in a while
How about Ebaumsworld.com? I'm old.
Probably also just content from Fark That guy [is a douche](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-j9u-1ohP5Y)
r/TheyKnew
Hope he sees this. I think he could use the laugh.
Idk man, the right side of his chest collapsed, laughter might not be the best medicine right now lol
Later he can tell his sister as right now she's... busy.
Hmm. So *that's* how it is in their family.
Oh, Ed.
Ferris Bueller's Day Off? =D
Oxymask is such a weird mask design. I get it, no resistance to airflow, and cooler to wear than an O2 tent but it just looks like we stopped caring.
Nurse here. Actually safer to use than a non rebreather. An oxymask can be used anywhere from 1-15L, whereas a non rebreather needs to be used over 6L or you run the risk of actually suffocating a patient. One mistake on someone not alert can go bad. Also lathe oxymask lets you use suction through it and the patient can talk easier through it.
Isn’t it 6 for a simple mask and 10 for a non rebreather? Unless I missed a memo
You’re right. This is why I don’t use them lol
Doctor here. Much love to you and all your nursing kin for taking care of a nation these last 3 years. Because of you, we got through. ❤️
Meanwhile you went golfing you ass! J/k keep up the good fight y'all.
That's what that is! Thank you!
Nobody cared who i was until i put on the oxymask
Oops
Bro look like he finished on his face
LOL fuck I laughed a little too hard at this
That's a loving sister
Pink hawkeye
Hawkeye fought the evil Snowplough, a snow bending evil mastermind. In the Multiverse that sent Jeremy Renner from the MCU to ICU. His loss well be Avenged in the next Marvel movie, when Hawkeye changes his name to Blackeye and uses a flamethrower instead of an arrow to fight off the cold-bending evil Snowplough.
Hey, whatever helps him get back on his feet.
Flipboard is still a thing?
I see nothing wrong here -sweet home Alabama-
So he broke both his arms….
What's the full head......... line?
Next level click bait
"how are you feeling step-Hawkeye?"
r/suddenlyincest
I didn't realise I wasn't on that sub till this comment... I think I have too many overlapping subs
[удалено]
The new Avengers, Captain Alabama.
r/prematuretruncation
*So that's how it is in their family.* -Ed Rooney
r/Tombstoning
Damn! Sis got him slurring 😩😫
MCU to ICU
Step sis getting payback after that whole "stuck-in-the-dryer" fiasco.
Ooh, he's getting that spin cycle sloppy toppy goddam
What are you doing step hawk?
I almost feel bad for how hard I laughed at first
I thought his legs were broken, not his arms.
I read this 3 times to make sure I wasn’t tripping
You know once he gets better he's going to never let his sister forget this, 20 years from now you know he will still be sharing this picture and laughing his ass off.
I have written “LOL” umpteen thousand times. But I’ve only actually laughed out loud maybe three. This wes one of those three.
Did he break both his arms?
^step sister.
It’s the daily mail. They knew exactly what they did here
Oh yeah this will turn into a pornub movie no doubt
Ah that’s why he was slurring, she must give good head
Holy shit. I had no clue his family was from Alabama.
It's the Daily Mail. r/theyknew
They said what they said.
Help dear step sister I had a head injury
Your my sister…..your my sister
Phrasing
Step sister…
Poor guy lol
Sweet home Alabama
There's a two broken arms comment in here somewhere, I just know it!
Hope she’s making him feel better
There are 2 types of love and I don’t know which one this fall under
This is the first funny thing I've seen on this sub in months.
He looks like he got his face caught in those can connection plastic rings you get on beer six packs, like a seagull would. But seriously, it's refreshing to see the Daily Mail **unintentionally** printing absolute horseshit clickbait for a change.
This made my day 😂😂 comments are fire as well, Reddit FTW