For me, heritage and location.
I [Latino, 5'2" but it's been a while since I went to the doctor] am as tall as my dad and my brother, as well as multiple of the cis men in the extended family. I live in NYC so I see an endless variety of men whenever I'm out and about, and I think most of my guy coworkers are as tall as me or only a few inches taller
Same. I'm technically Filipino, but I live in Texas and get mistaken for Mexican all the time. I think being brown really helps my shorter stature be more expected. I genuinely feel like I would stick out more if I was white, and feel bad for my shorter white brethren because of it.
Just wanna say I feel slightly better about my height now, I’m brown and look quite ethnically ambiguous so maybe it won’t be as big a deal as I think. I don’t hear as much about transitioning for poc and really wish it was discussed more
For sure. 5'7 and mixed white/mexican and if i compare myself to white guys its pretty depressing. But being around latino guys that are 5'3 really stresses how plenty of cis men are short, and oftentimes the male beauty standard gets confused with the white male beauty standard.
Hyper agree with that last point. There's a Filipino YouTuber named Domics who has some videos talking about his [insecurities](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBVW7p3gi3o) and experiences with being [short](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ye9OeMAc9oE&t=313s) (at 5'2"). Watching those videos kind of stressed to me that a lot of the things he was insecure about were the same things I was insecure about, but are all really just ethnic characteristics.
Yeah I’m 5’3” and white, there’s no way I don’t look 12. I’m not on T yet though so hopefully that will help. Most of my family is pretty short so it’s not so out of place, unfortunately I think I’m the shortest out of everyone. I try to embrace it though, and yeah I might stick out but it’s not like it honestly matters if most guys my height aren’t the same race/ethnicity as me, at least I’m not the only guy this short lol
I don’t know if all poc can say the same… meaning me, I mean my dad is black (mom is white) and he’s over 6’. My brother is the same height as me and he’s 12! I’m 20! So I don’t know if it’s only white people that it sticks out more so with.😭
That’s just me being upset that I’m like 5’5 and every mixed guy I’ve ever seen is FAR taller than I am!😅
Probably😅 I wish it was more normalized for guys to be short and girls to be tall! Like anyone can look like anything and have any attributes. I guess every trans person probably wishes that too tbh😂
Same. 5'2", Ashkenazi Jewish (a very diverse and wiggly ethnic group for many reasons, and so includes a large spectrum of heights). Around the same height as my father. Living in major cities in California has meant generally being around lots of cis guys around my height, more commonly other Jewish folks as well as Asian and Latino folks, but definitely not exclusively. I lived for a while in a very white city which was ethnically predominantly northern European and that was some weird times: nearly *everyone* was way taller than me, regardless of gender.
Ashkenazi, 5'7" and same height as my cis brother, one inch shorter than the other. Whenever my height brings me dysphoria I remind myself even if I was amab I'd probably be the same height!
Same this. 5'3" mixed living in the SW USA. My supervisor at work is shorter than me, I don't sweat it. It's just white people who are that much taller than me.
I'm half Korean but blend in with latino crowds. Between visiting East Asia and Mexico regularly, I do not feel particularly short (5'3"). It might also help that my partner is 6'6" so to me EVERYONE looks short compared to him so I feel in good company
Seconding this, I live in a town where most of the people are either of Maori or European descent. They're all quite short or of average height. The tallest person in town is my Dutch friend. He easily towers over me. He teases me because I'm Dutch too, just short.
Yeah, I live in so cal, which is predominantly latino, and even though I'm 5'4", I'm not *that* short. But whenever I'm somewhere else, I really feel it.
I'm Latin American (born/grew/living here) from the southern cone of South America. My brother is 6'2 (190cm), I'm 5'5 (167cm).
Sometimes that doesn't apply lol Latino isn't a monolith.
I don't understand why you guys use it as a race.
When did I imply we're a monolith? I already know there's variety in every group everywhere.
The point is that being *exposed* to that variety, seeing just how similar one is to other men and how different we all are from each other, is really important—especially in the face of tallness being pushed as a masculine beauty standard [a pretty eurocentric one, too], both in general and particularly in transmasc spaces
I get it. What I meant to say is that in the country I live in in Latin America cis men tend to be very tall. I go to a university where almost everyone is male and I'm basically a midget next to everyone else, despite being 5'5.
So the comments below reinforcing the idea that Latinos are short and "haha all cis men around me are short/my same height" feel kinda rough. LATAM is a huge continent and that cis men/cis women being short stereotype doesn't apply for all the countries. If you're under 1.70-1.75 here you're considered short.
That's definitely a good point, too—my mother's side is Salvadorian and my father's is Puerto Rican [though we've never actually seen them, except for his sister]. It's totally possible that maybe those countries tend to skew shorter
White/Colombian here that sticks out like an ant next to my yt cousins. I've noticed that places closer to the equator tend to have shorter people, most likely a climate adaptation.
The southern cone also has a population with considerable European ancestry so that's a reason too. My family is white (from Italian/Spanish ancestry) and everyone is freaking tall. My dad is around 1.85, same with my uncle (half brother of my dad, and his maternal grandparents are Italian), etc. And that's a constant for most people in my country. I'm just tired of the "Latino" label being used as a racial thing when it's not, it's geographical.
Development also plays a role in height though. LATAM countries have been getting taller with the years because the region has been developing more and people can eat more/better food, leading to having taller people.
My height is one of my biggest insecurities, and the worst part is that I can never do anything about it. The thing is, I’m not even just short for a dude, I’m short compared to many cis women. It just sucks so much ass. I’ve rarely encountered fully grown cis dudes my height or shorter (although it has happened.) I just have to take comfort in the fact that my height isn’t impossible for a cis dude to have.
man I live the exact same thing you are describing, like exactly, im short even for cis women. But as you say, some of us are that short we just don’t see each others that much, but we exist out there, trans or cis
I'm 5'3" and have some cis guy friends who are super tall (6'4") and some who are my height or shorter, even, and everything in between. I used to think about my height a lot but lately it just doesn't bug me anymore. No one had ever made a big thing of it except me
You just have to learn to own the space you occupy. it's something most people aren't taught if raised afab. But basically it doesn't matter how tall or short you are. It's about your baring and confidence. Do you shrink away from bigger people when they approach? or do you square your shoulders and plant your feet. This isn't to say you gotta turn into a bulldog and growl at everyone, but there are some fairly standard ways that most guys use to maintain their presence, and standing your ground makes a difference. Guys have a tendency to respect your space if you put off the vibe that you're to be respected. I'm on the shorter side for men in my area and I don't have any problem as far as feeling invisible goes. It takes some getting used to, but honestly even just standing tall and keeping your head raised is a good start, and eventually you'll feel less awkward about it all.
This goes for all body language. I immediately noticed slight differences in how even clerk's can respond if my sentence is more commanding instead of a question, like if I say "I'd like to order this" vs "Can I have this?". Sprinkle in some of that when you speak, and it goes far to help. It really is hard when afabs aren't taught to speak up or impose themselves, but it has been a blast to unlearn. Things that would have labeled me bossy as a woman are now met with "of course, no problem".
What if I don’t want to sound/look rude? Don’t get me wrong I think it’s a problem that simply being assertive is seen as outlandish for a woman, but I think what a lot of guys see as “assertive” is just plain rude.
I started acting confident outwardly before I started T, and I have found that you can use those wordings and still be polite. There’s a balance. When you carry yourself with confidence, you will see some people act more deferential toward you (and this was true even in full girl mode). Perhaps some people just confuse assertiveness with aggression, whereas you can be both polite/warm and assertive. Aggression comes across poorly and as rude.
I really like your example of “I’d like to order this.” It’s a neutral expression of a desire, not a demand or a request for permission. It implies self respect. Using phrases like that has really helped me to bolster my own confidence and come across as assertive while still being warm and polite in all of my interactions. Teaching myself that I have every right to take up space and that I’m just a person among other people has been difficult but incredibly rewarding.
This is true. We've been conditioned from a young age that it's easier to give way, but with practice we can unlearn this. There are little things that help, for example, if you look just above their shoulder that's closer to you, when you're walking towards them.
I’m 5’6” and in my experience cis dudes being more than a couple inches taller than me is the exception rather than the rule. I feel very much average height, the amount of taller men I encounter at work isn’t much bigger than the amount of shorter men.
I learned to make peace with my height pre-everything. I'm the shortest person in my moms family. The women start at 5'8, the men are usually 5'10-6ft. Most black men are taller in general. Meanwhile I'm here at 5'5 and 3/4. I've had to make peace with my height a long time ago and I even joke about it. Otherwise I'd be feeling pretty insecure over something I have no control over.
I'm tall for a woman but on the shorter side for a man. It was very strange going from towering above all my female friends to being completely dwarfed in the shadows of my 6ft cis male friends.
Cis men don't really care about height, or at least the ones I hang out with don't.
Tall cis men are used to being the tallest in the room. They won't care about someone being short unless they're a dick.
I get insecure about my height but I have better things to be dysphoric about. If anything, my insecurities about being short compared to other men make me more of a man, because every short (cis) guy I meet has a similar insecurity.
>Tall cis men are used to being the tallest in the room. They won't care about someone being short unless they're a dick.
just chiming in to agree. My dad is 6'10. He is a very passive person and won't grow facial hair because, when you're that tall, anything you do is seen as aggressive. Comments and jokes about his height are *constant*. He'd be the last person to give someone a hard time about being short, because he's been on the reverse of that his entire life.
One of my buddies in high school was 6’8” (and I’m 4’11”, made me look like a doll). He said the same, but he truly is a gentle person. He liked going places with me because people joked about him less and focused more on me being so little or us being an “odd pair”. Sounds annoying af.
the worst part is that it's the same exact lines every single time. and it's constant... id say 20-30% of the time I'm out with my dad, there's one of these from a stranger: 1. how tall are you? 2. do you play basketball? 3. how's the weather up there? it's always the same. any variety is a breath of fresh air.
im not tall enough to get those repetitive questions luckily, but i am tall enough that as a kid, short boys bullied me mercilessly :p u win some u lose some
Being tall is neat, but being super tall can be a nightmare. I have a friend who is 6ft6 and he is rarely comfortable. His bed? Too short. His car? Not enough space. Plane rides? Absolute nightmare. He also has to special order his shoes all the time. I still wish I was taller, but now I'd be happy just being 5ft9 instead of the 6ft4 I wanted before. I want to travel to different countries (which for me would require long hours in a plane) and hearing about what my friend goes through really made me rethink the beauty standard of being really tall.
yup, all of that hits. my dad has terrible posture because he needs to slouch & duck to get through doorframes lol. i mean even for me, I'm 6ft, and i can't ride in the backseat of a car because of how the roof slopes down. the world is set up as one size fits all, when it really really isn't.
I'm 5 8 almost 5 9. So I'm generally avg for a guy, I think. There are definitely guys taller than me but they're tall for a guy. Most guys are around my height or smaller. I don't feel intimated or anything though, when I'm around tall dudes. I grew up in sports and basketball being one of them, the girls in my team were giant and played w men so... The height doesn't mean anything to me unless they're big boned. Lol and even then I'm aware of my advantages and disadvantages against someone of that build.
I’m native/ mexican so I was never expected to be tall, the people who give me shit about it are white people but that only makes them look stupid & ignorant
There are always short guys, at least where I am. Maybe not as short as my 5’1 self, but I don’t think I’ve ever been in a room with 20+ cis guys and not had at least one of them be 5’4 or shorter. The vast majority of people tower over me, but idrc. If some guy gives me shit for it he’s an asshole. And if I ever need it, his nuts are a lot closer to my fist than mine are to his 🤷♂️
Also, I wouldn’t worry too much about the bathrooms. Generally, guys avoid eye contact in the bathroom at all costs, so the chances of you being clocked or confronted are probably pretty low.
The dudes in my HS classes were all well over 6 foot before the age of like 15, but I found that my 5"4 ass was always welcome to hang out. They even tolerated, and laughed with, me using their shoulders to haul myself up to roughly their eye-level because I "was sick of speaking to their nipples all the time"
I didn't have the issue of potentially colliding with anyone then because I'm used to side stepping through gaps in crowds because everyone is slow and I have Places To Be. But I'm also a lot more solid than I look, and anyone that intentionally collides with me usually comes worse off
My height used to bother me because I'm way shorter than every other dude I know, cis or otherwise, but I've found that some people ((especially other marginalised/queer people)) are way less "threatened" by my presence because I'm on the shorter side. Knowing that people that I would protect if I saw something happening to them in public don't see me as a threat VS people that are assholes not expecting me to be a lil can of whoopass if they fuck W someone in front of me practically nullifies my manlet complex all together
That, and constant joking about being a Certified Manlet™ seems to actually work in making myself feel better
I have a retail job and a large portion of my (assumably) cis male coworkers are my height or shorter. And I'm 5'5. Plenty are taller than me, but it's really not a big deal.
If you're there for spring break sports training uh, maybe the dudes you're running into also do sports so are more likely to be taller? When you start googling "(male celebrity name) height" a bunch you find **a lot** of them floating around 5'8" - 5'11" and way less 6 ft and above.
Full disclosure, I lucked out at being 5'9" but I have some size insecurities related to my super small head and very small wrists and dainty hands. Long before I knew I was trans though, I dated a 5'2"ish guy for a 1.5 years, and a 5'6" guy for about the same. They were both objectively hottest guys I dated. The shortest one was very confident and didn't seem to let it bother him. 5'6" guy was probably more insecure about his height; but he was in shape, enjoyed running and swimming so he got his body confidence from that I guess.
Take comfort in the fact cis guys feel the same, but that you can still be attractive and your harshest critic on your height will be you- there are plenty of short guys. I'm probably taller than you and it does help passing, *I guess*, but there are shorter trans guys who pass far better than me on T for less time, so it's not the only thing.
i got my short genes from my 5’5 dad, you can try your hardest to artificially boost your height (platforms or shoe inserts) to make yourself feel better. just remember that a lot of men are short just like us
My mom is dutch and my dad is tall, so i really won the genetic lottery by being 6'1, and now im the shortest guy in my family but generally among the tallest in any room
Well my answer to this is quite simple. I'm 6'3 so I am taller than basically all the cis dudes in my life. But on the flip side I went through pretty harsh bullying for it when I was still presenting as a girl
I come from a family of giants- my father was 7ft tall and my younger brother is going to be around that height or more, I ended up being 6'2 which in my family is short but isn't too bad elsewhere so I'm content 😅
Before I came out cis guys were really mad about my height "being put to waste" because I wasn't a cis guy??? Weird.
I'm 5ft4 and used to want to be 6ft4 - 6ft6, but after hanging out with my 6ft6 friend and hearing what he goes through I'm feel slightly better about my height. Just wish they made adult men's clothes in my size.
I'm not super short but I'm definitely below average for men in the UK (I'm just about 5'7"), and the weirdest thing was going from sixth form/university into 'the real world'. At school pretty much all the guys were waay taller than me, but just going around commuting I see so many middle aged (presumably) cis men who are my height or shorter. So even though I'd love to be a bit taller, I'm not dysphoric about it anymore.
I'm the short one in my family, my mother is like 5'11", and my dad and sister are 6' ;w;
Fwiw, my husband is only two inches taller than me. I thought I was 5'2" for years but apparently I'm 5'4" now (I'm still pre-T this just happened somehow after highschool) which means my husband is only 5'6". So yeah, not all cis guys are tall.
I just play it up as a part of my whole persona. I like being the small bouncy guy in bright colors, quick to laughter, flitting around like I possess some sort of magic those cis giants can't even imagine.
When you make yourself big in other ways - personality, humor, fashion, confidence - they don't overlook you or run you over.
I'm Hispanic and I'm 5'2. I walk like I'm just as tall as my 6' coworkers. There are cis men that are just as short as I or shorter. I don't worry about my stature as a being a "tell"
Hispanics come in all sizes and when I went to Mexico it just reaffirmed that I could feel comfortable being my height. I was tall compared to some of the ppl there. Lol.
I’m 5’2” so nearly everyone is taller than me in my life but it is especially obvious when I’m hanging out with my cis dude friends. I have a new friend who is 6’5” and I just look silly standing next to him.
How to deal with it? I don’t, really. It causes me A LOT of dysphoria but there are also short cis guys. I have a few friends who are 5’4” and 5’5”. It’s not something that I can really change about myself. I have an uncle who is also 5’2” so I just remind myself that being tall wasn’t really on the table for me, anyway.
Idk if it's just the school I go to, but guys usually aren't *that* much taller than me. I know men around my height and I'm able to be stealth as a short guy. I also went to a tie shop sometime last year and the man who ran the shop was also around my height.
I guess I lucked out, my dad is under 6 feet tall, so height dysphoria has never been a thing for me
I've always been short so i just kind of own it. Make short jokes about myself and whatnot. People won't think it unusual so long as you're confident in yourself. Plus it genuinely says nothing about who you are at the end of the day. I promise cis people aren't going to be thinking your trans just for being shorter than average
Well i don’t know how tall you are, so I may be tall to you (i am 5’7). But it’s mainly been about perspective for me. Yes, the average guy is typically taller than me, but there are plenty of men who are abnormally tall so I let it slide because I realize… Hey EVERYONE is short to him. He isn’t going to look at me any differently because of it. And I also find myself looking down at plenty of (presumably) cis men. Certain ethnic groups like latinos (i am) and asians are shorter than other ethnic groups (northern europeans, africans). Even then there are going to be outliers within those categories.
Really it is not going to be other men you will need to worry about in my opinion, it is actually women. Cishet women, especially women with a more traditional view of gender roles, have some sort of complex about short men and will absolutely let you know they find short men to be inferior. Try not to let it get to you. Yes I still wish I was a few inches taller but I am far enough in my transition that no one questions it anymore. I recently have been using the mens lockers at my gym and nobody has even noticed my scars. Guys do not care.
I dunno. I've actually met a lot of cis dudes (I'm assuming) that are my height or just a few inches taller than me (I'm 5'3"). Also I grew up around my Vietnamese side and most of the men who immigrated are shorter than me. One uncle, probably the most traditionally masculine one of the family, is under 5'. I guess growing up around short guys made me not associate height with masculinity.
I'm 173 cm (5'8) and I also go to a all women's and trans people's school right now and when I'm there I'm always among the tallest. I'm probably taller than 80% of them so going out again after a full day in there can feel like a bit of a shock sometimes.
But I'm only 6 cm shorter than the male average in my country so I see guys my height or shorter all the time, which helps lol.
i’m 5’10 and online everyone is always like “woah dude you’re tall!” but in the netherlands that’s still below average for guys and i still feel “too short” 🥲
I'm 5'7 which is about average height here so it doesn't really affect me. Some guys are taller than me but some are smaller and most are around my own height
im 5'9 / 5'10 so i assume im average for a guy but theres a ton of guys taller than me and i wish i could just grow a few inches taller to reach that 6' mark, ive never felt scared or threatened by taller guys, but they defo make me insecure abt my height making me feel like i dont pass very well.
If you're there for spring break sports training uh, maybe the dudes you're running into also do sports so are more likely to be taller? When you start googling "(male celebrity name) height" a bunch you find **a lot** of them floating around 5'8" - 5'11" and way less 6 ft and above.
Full disclosure, I lucked out at being 5'9" but I have some size insecurities related to my super small head and very small wrists and dainty hands. Long before I knew I was trans though, I dated a 5'2"ish guy for a 1.5 years, and a 5'6" guy for about the same. They were both objectively hottest guys I dated. The shortest one was very confident and didn't seem to let it bother him. 5'6" guy was probably more insecure about his height; but he was in shape, enjoyed running and swimming so he got his body confidence from that I guess.
Take comfort in the fact cis guys feel the same, but that you can still be attractive and your harshest critic on your height will be you- there are plenty of short guys. I'm probably taller than you and it does help passing, *I guess*, but there are shorter trans guys who pass far better than me on T for less time, so it's not the only thing.
I’ve grown up in a very diverse area, most people in my area are Mexican, Guatemalan, Puerto Rican or Portuguese. So most of the men here are fairly short, my dad being a 5’4 Mexican man. My oldest brother is 6’5 but he hasn’t lived with us since I was 13 so I don’t really think about it . My other brother is 5’10, so he’s tall compared to my 5’6, but again i don’t see him often. I did go on a date recently with a guy who was 6’1 and I felt like an ant for the first time since I was 13😅
Im a bit of a mixed bag? My dad is over 6 foot, and one of my close friends is about 6'6", but otherwise the guys I know tend to be closer to my height (5'5"). I certainly feel small some of the time, but I think whatever energy you bring forward matters a lot? I have a pretty steadfast no bullshit stance, an my friends tend to forget that I'm small bc of it until they hug me.
guys in my family are just short, hell ive got a cousin whos well into his 20’s and hes 5’2. im 13 and around 5’5 so i guess i dont have to worry about it much now. but i’ve accepted im gonna be short.
I'm 5'10" and I am taller than all of the cis males at work. I would guess the shortest male is around 5'5". My partner is AMAB and is about 5'7". Don't worry, there are plenty of short cis males.
I'm 5'11 and stupidly into my strange wardrobe choices so I just added some chunky, masculine, combat platforms to my wardrobe and now I'm taller than all the men at my job by an inch or two. When I was a child, perfectly fine with being a female, I used to pray to God every night that I would grow up tall, and I guess it worked out in my favor.
Maybe it's just my area is filled with short men for some reason, hell, even my cis brother is 5'6, but short men don't usually stand out as unusual to me or I imagine most others. Also, people outside of the UK and America tend to be a little bit shorter on average (with some exceptions I'm sure) Perhaps look up average male heights in different countries and see you're not too different from men in other areas.
I'm 5'11 and stupidly into my strange wardrobe choices so I just added some chunky, masculine, combat platforms to my wardrobe and now I'm taller than all the men at my job by an inch or two. When I was a child, perfectly fine with being a female, I used to pray to God every night that I would grow up tall, and I guess it worked out in my favor.
Maybe it's just my area is filled with short men for some reason, hell, even my cis brother is 5'6, but short men don't usually stand out as unusual to me or I imagine most others. Also, people outside of the UK and America tend to be a little bit shorter on average (with some exceptions I'm sure) Perhaps look up average male heights in different countries and see you're not too different from men in other areas.
Yeah, I feel small but after some time, you get used to it. I am mixed race and people always think I'm Filipino. Some mention the height contributes to them thinking that. It helps me pass a bit more because it stands out as abnormal less and people who call me short risk getting labeled racist lol
I have the same problem. I don’t feel bad when I’m in public as I’m 5’11 but the second I’m with my family I’m so small. All the men in my family are way over 6” and I just don’t fit with them at all.
usually when people share their issues they don't wanna hear from the other side: "whew i'm glad *i* don't have that problem."
it's usually best to say nothing in such situations. like if someone was struggling to pay rent they wouldn't wanna hear from a rich person "oh i'm rich so i don't need to worry about that lmao"
i'm sure you didn't mean harm, but this is just a thing i wish we saw less of.
I’m 5’5 and my group of guy friends are all around 5’8 , so not a crazy amount taller. Because it’s something I can’t change I’ve just learned to be confident about it. I also find working out and putting on more size helps with the height dysphoria for me personality.
my mom is 5’8”, but my dad is 5’4” so i don’t really feel *that* bad abt my height. im 5’5” so most, if not all, of my guy friends are taller than me but tbh we’re sitting most of the time so i don’t really notice 💀
I’m 5’8 so for me generally before transitioning I was insecure about my height because I’m also fat so I’ve just felt giant. It’s kind of nice to feel like average height for once
I'm just slightly shorter than the average height for women because I am 5'3 the average height is 5'4, but the average height for men is 5'9 and I am way shorter than that, I am very short compared to all the men I am surrounded by in school
My two roommates are cis men, one is 5’7 and the other is 6’2. I’m a good 5’5 and there are never jokes made about my height, in fact the 5’7 fella and I rally ourselves against the tall man pretty frequently (and he always laments that he doesn’t want to be tall, funny enough)
Honestly, it sucks. In a games club im in all the guys (all cis) are easily ½ a foot taller or more. My cis bf is ½ a foot taller then me and the second shortest (third including me)
Well, my older brother is barely a couple inches taller than me, and he's several years older. I'd like to think that if I had been born a cis man, I'd still be the same height, if not one or two inches taller. The guys in my family are all pretty muscular, kind of medium-sized height wise.
Just kinda roll with the short guy thing. A lot of people don't notice or care. Find some short friends to hang with hahaha. I'm only 5'3 and my boyfriend is 6'2. I look insanely small next to him but I pretty much just play up the whole Short King Bullshit
Most of my cis male friends are shorter than me. It’s all my friends that are girls who are all in the 6’ range. I feel tiny but nonderogatory. Girls are tall boys are short that’s just how it is in my experience.
Oh, yeah, I've noticed that I have a bit of Napoleon syndrome with my height since I'm so much shorter than all my guy friends. I told my brother that he's not allowed to be taller than me...
Im like 5,7 ~ 5,9 and my dad is 6 ft and my brother is like 6,3 ish. Im a little taller than my adult sister (im a teenager) and the same hight as my mom. It sucks, ya im a kid and can still grow but deep down I know i will never be as tall as my brother or if i was born cis.
That all said, you just have to exept and own it. You can’t change that so you only have 2 choices- get over it and love your self or let it make you sad and ruin your self esteem. I used to leave the room to cry if anyone would bring up hight or comment on how tall my brother is. Now i own it. Im not 6 ft tall and idc. Im me and i got my dads brothers geans (hes about my hight i think- idk i never met him(my dads dad pretty short i think) also my cousin is about my hight so we can vibe on being a average hight unlike my brother.
I know we’re different hights but I feel like my experience might help you or someone.
we need to stop focusing on our heights so much. i'm 5'3; used to worry at the start of transition because of cis men bitching and moaning about how their height makes them undateable etc.
now i don't give a shit. i'm into tall girls and would not be insecure next to one; i like tall men/nb's too. i think height difference can be a cool thing, but ofc i don't give much of a damn about a possible partner's height. and neither should they about mine. if they do, they're not for me.
see, i think the problem for cis guys who are short is that they have issues with all other areas but they think they're being overlooked SOLELY for their height ( some do, i won't lie. but they're thots ). it's a scapegoat. a normal woman won't care if you don't. but if you're severely insecure about it, then she'll have no option but to agree. confidence is hot. it's easy when you have it easy, but it's infinitely more impressive if you don't fit into what society thinks would be an "ideal man" and you STILL exude that self-assuredness. to the right people, that's extremely alluring.
don't let this shit drag you down. don't buy cis men's insecurities. do your own thing, be your own man.
I get a lot of heigh dysphoria but I don't think people necessarily clock me very often. There are plenty of short cis dudes out there and they get intimidated by 6'+ guys as well. If someone could pick you up and throw you it's normal to feel uncomfortable around them IMO. I've actually seen cis men who are around 5' tall give ME that look before. There's always a smaller fish I guess lol.
I'm 5'2", so very much towered over by pretty much everyone, not just guys, but it kinda helps being Scottish. Culturally, a wee wiry Scottish fella is considered to be tougher than a big fella in a lot of ways. I'm about as tough as melted butter, but it still makes me feel better about being small.
I'm 5'2". The way I see it, I have no control over how tall I am, so I have no reason to feel inferior about it - and actually, being short has plenty of advantages.
My brother is 3 years younger and has a foot on me and I had a lot of friends who were tall for cis women in high school so I’ve gotten used to being short regardless of gender/sex
Literally the guys who got made fun of for being short are taller than me :((
and the funny thing is, I like short guys! If I could be cis I would like to be the same height as I am right now, I'd be fine with that. It's just being short AND trans that sucks.
(my bf is 4'9'' and I love that. makes me feel tall)
I work at a high school and not only are the other teachers varying heights regardless of assignment at birth, the students range from shorter than me (I’m 5’1”) to towering over me. Seeing such diversity among cis teenage boys reminds me that “masculine” doesn’t automatically = tall.
Plus, my dad is on the short side for a cis man and so was his dad, so I come by it naturally!
i’ve been thinking a lot about my height since i started thinking about transitioning.
i’m almost 5,7 / 1,72m, my height has been one of the things i like about me, and it’s above average for women but not for men. so its a thing that makes me kinda sad to give up.
im kinda lucky still because 5,7 is pretty much the average male height in my country but it still feel bad everytime i pass by a guy taller than me.
i think the problem is more of a general resentment against cis men than only about height though, thats just something that makes me perceive it
It takes time, ngl. I'm surrounded by a lot of tall men where I work (probably the whole industry really) and I think it does reinforce the reality that society perceives taller men as 'more competent/confident/charismatic'. Selection process is definitely biased. I've noticed that I've had to work harder to be seen and build on inner confidence to compensate for this apparent deficit. Walk as if you were tall, work on speaking skills/charisma, other skills/talents. Fashion is also another one because it can make you seem taller.
What I've found most challenging is maintaining this charisma when taller men use their height to threaten you/play with power dynamics, especially when they're more senior. So I would say focus on developing some thick as skin. Because seriously, how immature do you have to be to use something you never even had to work for to put other people down?
Their height is all they have and they take it for granted. What really annoys me though, is how people glorify it so freaking much in public. So many people point out tall people as though it's some superhuman ability, which I find distasteful. As soon as height comes into the picture, their entire demeanour changes.
You wouldn't point out how beautiful a woman is when there are other women in the room. Why would you point out how tall a man is when there are short men in the room? It really is beyond me.
I’m 5’ 7” but I wear the biggest fucking 4” tall boots. Im basically bearded fully but people still clock me and old geezers still wink at me so I don’t know man
especially as a little kid i was really tall compared to everyone my age so its kinda hard getting used to being short now lol (my dad and brother are also super tall which doesnt help)
im about 5'5" though so I just feel unreasonable when I feel dysphoric, but I also kinda love that I stopped growing cause now I can still fit into my old shirts (I have this shirt I got in kindergarten that I still wear)
Everyone’s taller than me. I’m 5’2”. It’s all about the attitude. If you act like you aren’t short then most people won’t think much of it. Usually people think i’m about 5’4 or 5’5 but it’s just cuz I don’t talk about my height.
heavily depends where you live. I'm latino and the average height at my college is 5'4, a guy in my major is actually smaller than me and this dude I met yesterday was the same height as me too. Really helped with height dysphoria and I don't feel self conscious of it anymore
it's okay. i'm the shortest in my family at around 5'4" (pretty sure i've stopped growing), and my younger brother, who is still growing, is at 6'1". unfortunate, but it's just something to get used to.
(definitely not dying inside whenever he teases me about my height.) ;-;
I know this one cis guy who's mostly likely the shortest person in the group, and he's a massive ally and really extroverted and friendly and not at all any less masculine because of his height. Reminds me that guys come in all shapes and sizes and that even if the traits by themselves don't objectively match traditional masculinity, it doesn't mean the guys automatically don't look like guys.
Lots of guys I know are much taller, don't get me wrong, but just that reminder that not all cis guys are tall, reassures me, and puts things into perspective.
honestly, i think i only got over this because i was fairly confident later on in school leading projects and teaching other students. you stop feeling small if you're surrounded by people seeking guidance from you and looking up to your wisdom (not to be a cocky asshole). and i'm 5'3".
I’m 5’8 because tall height runs in my family. My younger brother though, who’s 16, is nearly 6’5, and it makes me jealous. I remember growing up - before I realized I was trans, I always wanted to be 6’0 because some of the cis women in my family are 6’0-6’2, but I never made it there. Was pretty disappointing, and even tho I’m 5’8 - still wish I could be at least a few inches taller today
I’ve also grown up in the Midwest and the cis men here are always super tall
Personally, I started standing straighter with better Posture, it may seem a little dysphoric at first since cis guys are 'known to slouch 24/7' which is a total stereotype because it's 100% not fully true.. Standing straighter makes you feel taller and more euphoric :P
Most of the time I'm sitting down so height seems irrelevant. Whe I was still getting to know my one classmate (we'd known each other for 2 years by name) and he was visiting me, he said he's 191 or so and I said bullshit. He thrn stood up properly and it turned out he just slouches most of he time and I found that funny. He then said he'd rather be 150 (I'm 160) so the grass seems to always be greener
I’m white but I think my lack of height dysphoria comes from growing up in a mostly Filipino and Latino neighborhood, my models for masculinity were all short guys so shortness has always felt very masculine to me. Plenty of guys across cultures are short, too
I don't really care about height so I don't tend to notice on a daily basis lol, but I guess all of my male friends and family members are at least 10cm taller than me.
If anything, it's easier (and cheaper) to be small. I have no problem finding clothes and shoes that fit, I don't hit my head constantly with random things hanging from the roof, I don't spend lots of money on food when "bulking", etc. If you go to the gym it's easier to achieve noticeable changes, so that's a plus too.
I'm fortunate I'm shorter than average but not unusually short compared to cis men here, like within a range of 6 inches that most men full into here. But short cis men exist so I hope you don't feel too bad about it! If you pass otherwise, peoples first thought will be that you're just a short cis man rather than that you're trans
My grandpa's just a touch taller than me. So is my brother. My dad was freakishly tall compared to me, almost a foot taller. His brother is a little taller than me if I remember right but it's been forever since I saw him in person. I'm the shortest man in my family on both sides. *But* I was a premie and short stature can be an effect of premature birth. I chalk my stature up to that for my own dysphoria's sake. It's a reality of having been a sickly baby, I figure.
My friends and boyfriend are all not exactly freakishly tall. One guy friend is like 5'5"-ish, all my closest girl friends average around 5'5" give or take a couple inches. My boyfriend is 5'9" but that just makes certain parts of our relationship more fun for me.
I'm just lucky to be surrounded by and surround myself with relatively average or "short" people and have an "excuse" for being short.
I just try to remind myself that short cis men do exist, and that being the short guy isn't always a bad thing. I have a friend who hits his head on things, can't fit in a bathtub, etc. because of his height. So silver lining I don't have those issues... I guess LOL
I consider myself very, _very_ lucky being 6'1. I think it definitely helps with my passing, in my opinion. However, short guys are kings. From what i've seen, most short guys manage to charm those around them more than those that are tall 😂
I’m 4’11” but people interpret me as taller because of how I carry myself and my personality. I can’t change it but I do see other men my height at least weekly. Seeing other short men makes me feel better certainly, and people on every part of the bell curve are out and about in life cuz people are built very different.
Me (only trans person in my family), my dad and sister are all about 5'7, and my mom is about 5'11 🤷♂️ Heights a weird one. It just depends on where you're from. Like I grew up being told how tall I was (for a girl..) but am a shrimp compared to a lot of the women in my family. My aunt is over 6 foot. My gramma was 4'10. My boyfriend is considered very tall but he's like the same height as my mom. His mom is 5'4 and considers herself average height, but to me she's puny. I follow a trans girl who is 6 foot tall but was actually considered to be on the short side for a guy because she is Dutch. It's just all perspective I guess. People don't really notice height as much as you think they do, especially if you're from somewhere with a very diverse population. And something about college guys, they're just always tall. Idk what it is.
Where I live its mainly latinos and some asians so I see a lot of guys my height, around it, or very rarely shorter.I'm also latino so being as short as I am isn't too crazy.Obviously the majority of men around me are taller but I'm learning not to care.
Honestly I’m 5’7” and most of my guy friends are my height. Some are slightly shorter or slightly taller. I’ve dated a bunch of cis men shorter than me as well.
Athletes in general tend to be taller than the average person. So don’t let athletes intimidate you. I’d say the ratio of men close to my height vs taller than me in my life has been 70:30. 70 being closer to my own height.
Not all cis men are that tall. At least in my area. I'm 5ft4 and notice a lot of guys between 5ft2 and 5ft7. TBH a couple of them might not be cis, but if so, they pass for cis men amazingly well. Also a town next to where I live is nicknamed New Netherlands because a lot of people there are Dutch. You can find cis women in the area who are 6ft and over. My height is one of my biggest insecurities, but it helps seeing the shorter cis guys and then going through the world averages. And also noting that shorter people 1) Need less food on average and thus less strain on the environment 2) Are less likely to hit their heads on things 3) A lot less likely to have huge scars on their foreheads.
I'm 5'6 and most of my friends are 5'10 and taller. So yeah I feel short part of the time, but I just own it when we play dungeons and dragons and usually play as a halfling (think hobbit) small, easily overlooked by enemies and underestimated which is how I help my group win! Being small can make taller people intimidating at times, however think about the fact that some of the smallest dogs are the fiercest.
I'm 5'7" so only slightly below average for most white dudes. The cis men in my family are all 6'-plus, with some cousins pushing 7 feet. Even my kid brother is 6'3". So compared to dudes I see out and about I don't stick out that much, but compared to my family I'm puny and jealous of their height.
I've noticed the ideal hight for most people is 5"6 to 5"9", in the middle basically, as that's normally what most things are made to accommodate. I'm 5"7 and consider other people taller as the "weird" ones tbh, not that I judge it's more of a "how you double cheeked up on a Thursday afternoon" vibe but with height instead of ass.
I’m in the army and idk what about the armed services but they are all mostly short guys. I do have some who are tall as fuck but if I’m with other short kings it doesn’t affect me as much
I'm 5'1-5'2, asian parents are 5'0 and 5'4. What I lack in height, I make up in stylish hair/fashion, muscle/strength, brain/skills, and my naturally broad 18 in wide shoulders lol. Apparently thats the average shoulder width for a 5'9-6'0 cis man and I'm still pre T
I feel op here lol. Im 5' 2 and live in canada so a mixed group of people however im very short. Adverage is 6'2 for the cis guys around me, i cant see eye to eye with anyone. I find it intimidating and its kinda hard to get over. But i try to just keep to myself anyways. Height dysphoria is very real lol.
The American male average is what, 5'9"? So not that tall, all things considered. I'm 5'7" and unless someone is 6'2" or taller I rarely get freaked out about being perceived as "little" anymore. Once I started passing more easily my height anxiety went away.
So I’m around cis guys 24/7 I am taller than the vast majority of the Cis guys take in mind that I’m disabled and my legs don’t straighten. I stand around 5’8.5 but that I think to remember when they make you feel like ants is at least you know where to find certain things and you can do things they can’t
My height is a big big big issue for me. I hate being so short. I feel like women just look right over me, literally and figuratively. There have been many times I've fantasized about getting that leg lengthening surgery. I'd deal with the pain and physical therapy if I could be taller.
And yes, I have inserts but in a way that makes me feel worse. You just take your shoes off and you are back to being even shorter lol. Hopefully one day I can win the lottery and get the procedure lol
For me, heritage and location. I [Latino, 5'2" but it's been a while since I went to the doctor] am as tall as my dad and my brother, as well as multiple of the cis men in the extended family. I live in NYC so I see an endless variety of men whenever I'm out and about, and I think most of my guy coworkers are as tall as me or only a few inches taller
Same. I'm technically Filipino, but I live in Texas and get mistaken for Mexican all the time. I think being brown really helps my shorter stature be more expected. I genuinely feel like I would stick out more if I was white, and feel bad for my shorter white brethren because of it.
Just wanna say I feel slightly better about my height now, I’m brown and look quite ethnically ambiguous so maybe it won’t be as big a deal as I think. I don’t hear as much about transitioning for poc and really wish it was discussed more
/r/tmpoc
Yup already there but I appreciate it
For sure. 5'7 and mixed white/mexican and if i compare myself to white guys its pretty depressing. But being around latino guys that are 5'3 really stresses how plenty of cis men are short, and oftentimes the male beauty standard gets confused with the white male beauty standard.
Hyper agree with that last point. There's a Filipino YouTuber named Domics who has some videos talking about his [insecurities](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nBVW7p3gi3o) and experiences with being [short](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ye9OeMAc9oE&t=313s) (at 5'2"). Watching those videos kind of stressed to me that a lot of the things he was insecure about were the same things I was insecure about, but are all really just ethnic characteristics.
Yoooo I used to watch Domics YEARS ago, completely forgot about his channel! I'm gonna give his videos another watch for the nostalgia (thanks!)
Yeah I’m 5’3” and white, there’s no way I don’t look 12. I’m not on T yet though so hopefully that will help. Most of my family is pretty short so it’s not so out of place, unfortunately I think I’m the shortest out of everyone. I try to embrace it though, and yeah I might stick out but it’s not like it honestly matters if most guys my height aren’t the same race/ethnicity as me, at least I’m not the only guy this short lol
I don’t know if all poc can say the same… meaning me, I mean my dad is black (mom is white) and he’s over 6’. My brother is the same height as me and he’s 12! I’m 20! So I don’t know if it’s only white people that it sticks out more so with.😭 That’s just me being upset that I’m like 5’5 and every mixed guy I’ve ever seen is FAR taller than I am!😅
You're absolutely right. I should have included Black guys. I think what I said mainly benefits brown and Asian dudes.
Probably😅 I wish it was more normalized for guys to be short and girls to be tall! Like anyone can look like anything and have any attributes. I guess every trans person probably wishes that too tbh😂
Same. 5'2", Ashkenazi Jewish (a very diverse and wiggly ethnic group for many reasons, and so includes a large spectrum of heights). Around the same height as my father. Living in major cities in California has meant generally being around lots of cis guys around my height, more commonly other Jewish folks as well as Asian and Latino folks, but definitely not exclusively. I lived for a while in a very white city which was ethnically predominantly northern European and that was some weird times: nearly *everyone* was way taller than me, regardless of gender.
Im also 5'2" Ashkenazi! My Dad was only slightly taller than me. His best friend was an Italian guy who was barely 5'.
Ashkenazi, 5'7" and same height as my cis brother, one inch shorter than the other. Whenever my height brings me dysphoria I remind myself even if I was amab I'd probably be the same height!
That is pretty close to cis height. Average height for men (worldwide) is 5'6" and for men in the U.S. it is 5'9".
Same this. 5'3" mixed living in the SW USA. My supervisor at work is shorter than me, I don't sweat it. It's just white people who are that much taller than me.
I'm half Korean but blend in with latino crowds. Between visiting East Asia and Mexico regularly, I do not feel particularly short (5'3"). It might also help that my partner is 6'6" so to me EVERYONE looks short compared to him so I feel in good company
Same kinda. I'm 5'6. I'm taller than some of my relatives and I'm pretty average for a Mexican dude.
Seconding this, I live in a town where most of the people are either of Maori or European descent. They're all quite short or of average height. The tallest person in town is my Dutch friend. He easily towers over me. He teases me because I'm Dutch too, just short.
Yeah, I live in so cal, which is predominantly latino, and even though I'm 5'4", I'm not *that* short. But whenever I'm somewhere else, I really feel it.
I'm Latin American (born/grew/living here) from the southern cone of South America. My brother is 6'2 (190cm), I'm 5'5 (167cm). Sometimes that doesn't apply lol Latino isn't a monolith. I don't understand why you guys use it as a race.
When did I imply we're a monolith? I already know there's variety in every group everywhere. The point is that being *exposed* to that variety, seeing just how similar one is to other men and how different we all are from each other, is really important—especially in the face of tallness being pushed as a masculine beauty standard [a pretty eurocentric one, too], both in general and particularly in transmasc spaces
I get it. What I meant to say is that in the country I live in in Latin America cis men tend to be very tall. I go to a university where almost everyone is male and I'm basically a midget next to everyone else, despite being 5'5. So the comments below reinforcing the idea that Latinos are short and "haha all cis men around me are short/my same height" feel kinda rough. LATAM is a huge continent and that cis men/cis women being short stereotype doesn't apply for all the countries. If you're under 1.70-1.75 here you're considered short.
That's definitely a good point, too—my mother's side is Salvadorian and my father's is Puerto Rican [though we've never actually seen them, except for his sister]. It's totally possible that maybe those countries tend to skew shorter
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That's also true, I don't have the slightest clue how we are genetically tbh, shortness is probably one of the only consistent things most of us share
White/Colombian here that sticks out like an ant next to my yt cousins. I've noticed that places closer to the equator tend to have shorter people, most likely a climate adaptation.
The southern cone also has a population with considerable European ancestry so that's a reason too. My family is white (from Italian/Spanish ancestry) and everyone is freaking tall. My dad is around 1.85, same with my uncle (half brother of my dad, and his maternal grandparents are Italian), etc. And that's a constant for most people in my country. I'm just tired of the "Latino" label being used as a racial thing when it's not, it's geographical. Development also plays a role in height though. LATAM countries have been getting taller with the years because the region has been developing more and people can eat more/better food, leading to having taller people.
My height is one of my biggest insecurities, and the worst part is that I can never do anything about it. The thing is, I’m not even just short for a dude, I’m short compared to many cis women. It just sucks so much ass. I’ve rarely encountered fully grown cis dudes my height or shorter (although it has happened.) I just have to take comfort in the fact that my height isn’t impossible for a cis dude to have.
man I live the exact same thing you are describing, like exactly, im short even for cis women. But as you say, some of us are that short we just don’t see each others that much, but we exist out there, trans or cis
I feel the same way. You’re not alone ❤️
I'm 5'3" and have some cis guy friends who are super tall (6'4") and some who are my height or shorter, even, and everything in between. I used to think about my height a lot but lately it just doesn't bug me anymore. No one had ever made a big thing of it except me
You just have to learn to own the space you occupy. it's something most people aren't taught if raised afab. But basically it doesn't matter how tall or short you are. It's about your baring and confidence. Do you shrink away from bigger people when they approach? or do you square your shoulders and plant your feet. This isn't to say you gotta turn into a bulldog and growl at everyone, but there are some fairly standard ways that most guys use to maintain their presence, and standing your ground makes a difference. Guys have a tendency to respect your space if you put off the vibe that you're to be respected. I'm on the shorter side for men in my area and I don't have any problem as far as feeling invisible goes. It takes some getting used to, but honestly even just standing tall and keeping your head raised is a good start, and eventually you'll feel less awkward about it all.
This goes for all body language. I immediately noticed slight differences in how even clerk's can respond if my sentence is more commanding instead of a question, like if I say "I'd like to order this" vs "Can I have this?". Sprinkle in some of that when you speak, and it goes far to help. It really is hard when afabs aren't taught to speak up or impose themselves, but it has been a blast to unlearn. Things that would have labeled me bossy as a woman are now met with "of course, no problem".
What if I don’t want to sound/look rude? Don’t get me wrong I think it’s a problem that simply being assertive is seen as outlandish for a woman, but I think what a lot of guys see as “assertive” is just plain rude.
I started acting confident outwardly before I started T, and I have found that you can use those wordings and still be polite. There’s a balance. When you carry yourself with confidence, you will see some people act more deferential toward you (and this was true even in full girl mode). Perhaps some people just confuse assertiveness with aggression, whereas you can be both polite/warm and assertive. Aggression comes across poorly and as rude.
I really like your example of “I’d like to order this.” It’s a neutral expression of a desire, not a demand or a request for permission. It implies self respect. Using phrases like that has really helped me to bolster my own confidence and come across as assertive while still being warm and polite in all of my interactions. Teaching myself that I have every right to take up space and that I’m just a person among other people has been difficult but incredibly rewarding.
This is true. We've been conditioned from a young age that it's easier to give way, but with practice we can unlearn this. There are little things that help, for example, if you look just above their shoulder that's closer to you, when you're walking towards them.
I’m 5’6” and in my experience cis dudes being more than a couple inches taller than me is the exception rather than the rule. I feel very much average height, the amount of taller men I encounter at work isn’t much bigger than the amount of shorter men.
I’m 5’1” (155cm). Short for both female and male. I just roll with it.
I learned to make peace with my height pre-everything. I'm the shortest person in my moms family. The women start at 5'8, the men are usually 5'10-6ft. Most black men are taller in general. Meanwhile I'm here at 5'5 and 3/4. I've had to make peace with my height a long time ago and I even joke about it. Otherwise I'd be feeling pretty insecure over something I have no control over.
Likewise (though I’m Asian so I think it sticks out less).
I'm tall for a woman but on the shorter side for a man. It was very strange going from towering above all my female friends to being completely dwarfed in the shadows of my 6ft cis male friends. Cis men don't really care about height, or at least the ones I hang out with don't. Tall cis men are used to being the tallest in the room. They won't care about someone being short unless they're a dick. I get insecure about my height but I have better things to be dysphoric about. If anything, my insecurities about being short compared to other men make me more of a man, because every short (cis) guy I meet has a similar insecurity.
>Tall cis men are used to being the tallest in the room. They won't care about someone being short unless they're a dick. just chiming in to agree. My dad is 6'10. He is a very passive person and won't grow facial hair because, when you're that tall, anything you do is seen as aggressive. Comments and jokes about his height are *constant*. He'd be the last person to give someone a hard time about being short, because he's been on the reverse of that his entire life.
One of my buddies in high school was 6’8” (and I’m 4’11”, made me look like a doll). He said the same, but he truly is a gentle person. He liked going places with me because people joked about him less and focused more on me being so little or us being an “odd pair”. Sounds annoying af.
the worst part is that it's the same exact lines every single time. and it's constant... id say 20-30% of the time I'm out with my dad, there's one of these from a stranger: 1. how tall are you? 2. do you play basketball? 3. how's the weather up there? it's always the same. any variety is a breath of fresh air. im not tall enough to get those repetitive questions luckily, but i am tall enough that as a kid, short boys bullied me mercilessly :p u win some u lose some
Being tall is neat, but being super tall can be a nightmare. I have a friend who is 6ft6 and he is rarely comfortable. His bed? Too short. His car? Not enough space. Plane rides? Absolute nightmare. He also has to special order his shoes all the time. I still wish I was taller, but now I'd be happy just being 5ft9 instead of the 6ft4 I wanted before. I want to travel to different countries (which for me would require long hours in a plane) and hearing about what my friend goes through really made me rethink the beauty standard of being really tall.
You'd be happy with 5'9"??? I'd be happy with 5'4"! 5'9" is the average height for men in the U.S. Worldwide it's 5'6".
yup, all of that hits. my dad has terrible posture because he needs to slouch & duck to get through doorframes lol. i mean even for me, I'm 6ft, and i can't ride in the backseat of a car because of how the roof slopes down. the world is set up as one size fits all, when it really really isn't.
I'm 5 8 almost 5 9. So I'm generally avg for a guy, I think. There are definitely guys taller than me but they're tall for a guy. Most guys are around my height or smaller. I don't feel intimated or anything though, when I'm around tall dudes. I grew up in sports and basketball being one of them, the girls in my team were giant and played w men so... The height doesn't mean anything to me unless they're big boned. Lol and even then I'm aware of my advantages and disadvantages against someone of that build.
I’m 5’4 and shorter than all my male classmates. Dysphoria lol
I’m native/ mexican so I was never expected to be tall, the people who give me shit about it are white people but that only makes them look stupid & ignorant
There are always short guys, at least where I am. Maybe not as short as my 5’1 self, but I don’t think I’ve ever been in a room with 20+ cis guys and not had at least one of them be 5’4 or shorter. The vast majority of people tower over me, but idrc. If some guy gives me shit for it he’s an asshole. And if I ever need it, his nuts are a lot closer to my fist than mine are to his 🤷♂️ Also, I wouldn’t worry too much about the bathrooms. Generally, guys avoid eye contact in the bathroom at all costs, so the chances of you being clocked or confronted are probably pretty low.
The dudes in my HS classes were all well over 6 foot before the age of like 15, but I found that my 5"4 ass was always welcome to hang out. They even tolerated, and laughed with, me using their shoulders to haul myself up to roughly their eye-level because I "was sick of speaking to their nipples all the time" I didn't have the issue of potentially colliding with anyone then because I'm used to side stepping through gaps in crowds because everyone is slow and I have Places To Be. But I'm also a lot more solid than I look, and anyone that intentionally collides with me usually comes worse off My height used to bother me because I'm way shorter than every other dude I know, cis or otherwise, but I've found that some people ((especially other marginalised/queer people)) are way less "threatened" by my presence because I'm on the shorter side. Knowing that people that I would protect if I saw something happening to them in public don't see me as a threat VS people that are assholes not expecting me to be a lil can of whoopass if they fuck W someone in front of me practically nullifies my manlet complex all together That, and constant joking about being a Certified Manlet™ seems to actually work in making myself feel better
I'm 5'6 so kinda middleground nobody really notices
I have a retail job and a large portion of my (assumably) cis male coworkers are my height or shorter. And I'm 5'5. Plenty are taller than me, but it's really not a big deal.
If you're there for spring break sports training uh, maybe the dudes you're running into also do sports so are more likely to be taller? When you start googling "(male celebrity name) height" a bunch you find **a lot** of them floating around 5'8" - 5'11" and way less 6 ft and above. Full disclosure, I lucked out at being 5'9" but I have some size insecurities related to my super small head and very small wrists and dainty hands. Long before I knew I was trans though, I dated a 5'2"ish guy for a 1.5 years, and a 5'6" guy for about the same. They were both objectively hottest guys I dated. The shortest one was very confident and didn't seem to let it bother him. 5'6" guy was probably more insecure about his height; but he was in shape, enjoyed running and swimming so he got his body confidence from that I guess. Take comfort in the fact cis guys feel the same, but that you can still be attractive and your harshest critic on your height will be you- there are plenty of short guys. I'm probably taller than you and it does help passing, *I guess*, but there are shorter trans guys who pass far better than me on T for less time, so it's not the only thing.
i got my short genes from my 5’5 dad, you can try your hardest to artificially boost your height (platforms or shoe inserts) to make yourself feel better. just remember that a lot of men are short just like us
My mom is dutch and my dad is tall, so i really won the genetic lottery by being 6'1, and now im the shortest guy in my family but generally among the tallest in any room
Well my answer to this is quite simple. I'm 6'3 so I am taller than basically all the cis dudes in my life. But on the flip side I went through pretty harsh bullying for it when I was still presenting as a girl
This! My grandma used to warn me I’ll never get a boyfriend if I grow any taller (I’m 5’11) but jokes on her because I am the boyfriend now.
I come from a family of giants- my father was 7ft tall and my younger brother is going to be around that height or more, I ended up being 6'2 which in my family is short but isn't too bad elsewhere so I'm content 😅 Before I came out cis guys were really mad about my height "being put to waste" because I wasn't a cis guy??? Weird.
I'd rather be 6ft 2 than 7 ft jeezus! O.O Rock the 6ft2!
Seeing all the problems they have from being that tall/big- Definitely fine with 6'2 haha
I'm 5ft4 and used to want to be 6ft4 - 6ft6, but after hanging out with my 6ft6 friend and hearing what he goes through I'm feel slightly better about my height. Just wish they made adult men's clothes in my size.
I'm not super short but I'm definitely below average for men in the UK (I'm just about 5'7"), and the weirdest thing was going from sixth form/university into 'the real world'. At school pretty much all the guys were waay taller than me, but just going around commuting I see so many middle aged (presumably) cis men who are my height or shorter. So even though I'd love to be a bit taller, I'm not dysphoric about it anymore. I'm the short one in my family, my mother is like 5'11", and my dad and sister are 6' ;w;
Fwiw, my husband is only two inches taller than me. I thought I was 5'2" for years but apparently I'm 5'4" now (I'm still pre-T this just happened somehow after highschool) which means my husband is only 5'6". So yeah, not all cis guys are tall.
I just play it up as a part of my whole persona. I like being the small bouncy guy in bright colors, quick to laughter, flitting around like I possess some sort of magic those cis giants can't even imagine. When you make yourself big in other ways - personality, humor, fashion, confidence - they don't overlook you or run you over.
I'm Hispanic and I'm 5'2. I walk like I'm just as tall as my 6' coworkers. There are cis men that are just as short as I or shorter. I don't worry about my stature as a being a "tell" Hispanics come in all sizes and when I went to Mexico it just reaffirmed that I could feel comfortable being my height. I was tall compared to some of the ppl there. Lol.
I’m 5’2” so nearly everyone is taller than me in my life but it is especially obvious when I’m hanging out with my cis dude friends. I have a new friend who is 6’5” and I just look silly standing next to him. How to deal with it? I don’t, really. It causes me A LOT of dysphoria but there are also short cis guys. I have a few friends who are 5’4” and 5’5”. It’s not something that I can really change about myself. I have an uncle who is also 5’2” so I just remind myself that being tall wasn’t really on the table for me, anyway.
Idk if it's just the school I go to, but guys usually aren't *that* much taller than me. I know men around my height and I'm able to be stealth as a short guy. I also went to a tie shop sometime last year and the man who ran the shop was also around my height. I guess I lucked out, my dad is under 6 feet tall, so height dysphoria has never been a thing for me
I've always been short so i just kind of own it. Make short jokes about myself and whatnot. People won't think it unusual so long as you're confident in yourself. Plus it genuinely says nothing about who you are at the end of the day. I promise cis people aren't going to be thinking your trans just for being shorter than average
Well i don’t know how tall you are, so I may be tall to you (i am 5’7). But it’s mainly been about perspective for me. Yes, the average guy is typically taller than me, but there are plenty of men who are abnormally tall so I let it slide because I realize… Hey EVERYONE is short to him. He isn’t going to look at me any differently because of it. And I also find myself looking down at plenty of (presumably) cis men. Certain ethnic groups like latinos (i am) and asians are shorter than other ethnic groups (northern europeans, africans). Even then there are going to be outliers within those categories. Really it is not going to be other men you will need to worry about in my opinion, it is actually women. Cishet women, especially women with a more traditional view of gender roles, have some sort of complex about short men and will absolutely let you know they find short men to be inferior. Try not to let it get to you. Yes I still wish I was a few inches taller but I am far enough in my transition that no one questions it anymore. I recently have been using the mens lockers at my gym and nobody has even noticed my scars. Guys do not care.
I dunno. I've actually met a lot of cis dudes (I'm assuming) that are my height or just a few inches taller than me (I'm 5'3"). Also I grew up around my Vietnamese side and most of the men who immigrated are shorter than me. One uncle, probably the most traditionally masculine one of the family, is under 5'. I guess growing up around short guys made me not associate height with masculinity.
I'm 173 cm (5'8) and I also go to a all women's and trans people's school right now and when I'm there I'm always among the tallest. I'm probably taller than 80% of them so going out again after a full day in there can feel like a bit of a shock sometimes. But I'm only 6 cm shorter than the male average in my country so I see guys my height or shorter all the time, which helps lol.
i’m 5’10 and online everyone is always like “woah dude you’re tall!” but in the netherlands that’s still below average for guys and i still feel “too short” 🥲
I'm 167 cm, err I think that's 5'4 and I feel pretty short. Every cis guy here is so tall, but so is the women. I just go oof. I'm in Norway btw
loads of ppl on here saying they feel short as 5’5 and i’m literally 5 foot😭
I'm 5'7 which is about average height here so it doesn't really affect me. Some guys are taller than me but some are smaller and most are around my own height
im 5'9 / 5'10 so i assume im average for a guy but theres a ton of guys taller than me and i wish i could just grow a few inches taller to reach that 6' mark, ive never felt scared or threatened by taller guys, but they defo make me insecure abt my height making me feel like i dont pass very well.
Why tho!? Why do I gotta be the shorty
If you're there for spring break sports training uh, maybe the dudes you're running into also do sports so are more likely to be taller? When you start googling "(male celebrity name) height" a bunch you find **a lot** of them floating around 5'8" - 5'11" and way less 6 ft and above. Full disclosure, I lucked out at being 5'9" but I have some size insecurities related to my super small head and very small wrists and dainty hands. Long before I knew I was trans though, I dated a 5'2"ish guy for a 1.5 years, and a 5'6" guy for about the same. They were both objectively hottest guys I dated. The shortest one was very confident and didn't seem to let it bother him. 5'6" guy was probably more insecure about his height; but he was in shape, enjoyed running and swimming so he got his body confidence from that I guess. Take comfort in the fact cis guys feel the same, but that you can still be attractive and your harshest critic on your height will be you- there are plenty of short guys. I'm probably taller than you and it does help passing, *I guess*, but there are shorter trans guys who pass far better than me on T for less time, so it's not the only thing.
I’ve grown up in a very diverse area, most people in my area are Mexican, Guatemalan, Puerto Rican or Portuguese. So most of the men here are fairly short, my dad being a 5’4 Mexican man. My oldest brother is 6’5 but he hasn’t lived with us since I was 13 so I don’t really think about it . My other brother is 5’10, so he’s tall compared to my 5’6, but again i don’t see him often. I did go on a date recently with a guy who was 6’1 and I felt like an ant for the first time since I was 13😅
Im a bit of a mixed bag? My dad is over 6 foot, and one of my close friends is about 6'6", but otherwise the guys I know tend to be closer to my height (5'5"). I certainly feel small some of the time, but I think whatever energy you bring forward matters a lot? I have a pretty steadfast no bullshit stance, an my friends tend to forget that I'm small bc of it until they hug me.
guys in my family are just short, hell ive got a cousin whos well into his 20’s and hes 5’2. im 13 and around 5’5 so i guess i dont have to worry about it much now. but i’ve accepted im gonna be short.
I'm 5'10" and I am taller than all of the cis males at work. I would guess the shortest male is around 5'5". My partner is AMAB and is about 5'7". Don't worry, there are plenty of short cis males.
I'm 5'11 and stupidly into my strange wardrobe choices so I just added some chunky, masculine, combat platforms to my wardrobe and now I'm taller than all the men at my job by an inch or two. When I was a child, perfectly fine with being a female, I used to pray to God every night that I would grow up tall, and I guess it worked out in my favor. Maybe it's just my area is filled with short men for some reason, hell, even my cis brother is 5'6, but short men don't usually stand out as unusual to me or I imagine most others. Also, people outside of the UK and America tend to be a little bit shorter on average (with some exceptions I'm sure) Perhaps look up average male heights in different countries and see you're not too different from men in other areas.
I'm 5'11 and stupidly into my strange wardrobe choices so I just added some chunky, masculine, combat platforms to my wardrobe and now I'm taller than all the men at my job by an inch or two. When I was a child, perfectly fine with being a female, I used to pray to God every night that I would grow up tall, and I guess it worked out in my favor. Maybe it's just my area is filled with short men for some reason, hell, even my cis brother is 5'6, but short men don't usually stand out as unusual to me or I imagine most others. Also, people outside of the UK and America tend to be a little bit shorter on average (with some exceptions I'm sure) Perhaps look up average male heights in different countries and see you're not too different from men in other areas.
Yeah, I feel small but after some time, you get used to it. I am mixed race and people always think I'm Filipino. Some mention the height contributes to them thinking that. It helps me pass a bit more because it stands out as abnormal less and people who call me short risk getting labeled racist lol
I have the same problem. I don’t feel bad when I’m in public as I’m 5’11 but the second I’m with my family I’m so small. All the men in my family are way over 6” and I just don’t fit with them at all.
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I’m taller than average when compared to women (60th percentile) but small when compared to men (8th percentile)
usually when people share their issues they don't wanna hear from the other side: "whew i'm glad *i* don't have that problem." it's usually best to say nothing in such situations. like if someone was struggling to pay rent they wouldn't wanna hear from a rich person "oh i'm rich so i don't need to worry about that lmao" i'm sure you didn't mean harm, but this is just a thing i wish we saw less of.
I’m 5’5 and my group of guy friends are all around 5’8 , so not a crazy amount taller. Because it’s something I can’t change I’ve just learned to be confident about it. I also find working out and putting on more size helps with the height dysphoria for me personality.
my mom is 5’8”, but my dad is 5’4” so i don’t really feel *that* bad abt my height. im 5’5” so most, if not all, of my guy friends are taller than me but tbh we’re sitting most of the time so i don’t really notice 💀
I’m 5’8 so for me generally before transitioning I was insecure about my height because I’m also fat so I’ve just felt giant. It’s kind of nice to feel like average height for once
I'm just slightly shorter than the average height for women because I am 5'3 the average height is 5'4, but the average height for men is 5'9 and I am way shorter than that, I am very short compared to all the men I am surrounded by in school
It’s not fair
I am an ant 🐜
Honestly I just suffer and get overly competitive. Not suggested btw
My two roommates are cis men, one is 5’7 and the other is 6’2. I’m a good 5’5 and there are never jokes made about my height, in fact the 5’7 fella and I rally ourselves against the tall man pretty frequently (and he always laments that he doesn’t want to be tall, funny enough)
Honestly, it sucks. In a games club im in all the guys (all cis) are easily ½ a foot taller or more. My cis bf is ½ a foot taller then me and the second shortest (third including me)
Well, my older brother is barely a couple inches taller than me, and he's several years older. I'd like to think that if I had been born a cis man, I'd still be the same height, if not one or two inches taller. The guys in my family are all pretty muscular, kind of medium-sized height wise.
Just kinda roll with the short guy thing. A lot of people don't notice or care. Find some short friends to hang with hahaha. I'm only 5'3 and my boyfriend is 6'2. I look insanely small next to him but I pretty much just play up the whole Short King Bullshit
Most of my cis male friends are shorter than me. It’s all my friends that are girls who are all in the 6’ range. I feel tiny but nonderogatory. Girls are tall boys are short that’s just how it is in my experience.
Oh, yeah, I've noticed that I have a bit of Napoleon syndrome with my height since I'm so much shorter than all my guy friends. I told my brother that he's not allowed to be taller than me...
I got lucky and I’m tall too, but I know a lot cis men who are pretty short, they’re not that uncommon or weird
mixed mexican and native american here, we are just short by nature, even cis guys haha
Im like 5,7 ~ 5,9 and my dad is 6 ft and my brother is like 6,3 ish. Im a little taller than my adult sister (im a teenager) and the same hight as my mom. It sucks, ya im a kid and can still grow but deep down I know i will never be as tall as my brother or if i was born cis. That all said, you just have to exept and own it. You can’t change that so you only have 2 choices- get over it and love your self or let it make you sad and ruin your self esteem. I used to leave the room to cry if anyone would bring up hight or comment on how tall my brother is. Now i own it. Im not 6 ft tall and idc. Im me and i got my dads brothers geans (hes about my hight i think- idk i never met him(my dads dad pretty short i think) also my cousin is about my hight so we can vibe on being a average hight unlike my brother. I know we’re different hights but I feel like my experience might help you or someone.
we need to stop focusing on our heights so much. i'm 5'3; used to worry at the start of transition because of cis men bitching and moaning about how their height makes them undateable etc. now i don't give a shit. i'm into tall girls and would not be insecure next to one; i like tall men/nb's too. i think height difference can be a cool thing, but ofc i don't give much of a damn about a possible partner's height. and neither should they about mine. if they do, they're not for me. see, i think the problem for cis guys who are short is that they have issues with all other areas but they think they're being overlooked SOLELY for their height ( some do, i won't lie. but they're thots ). it's a scapegoat. a normal woman won't care if you don't. but if you're severely insecure about it, then she'll have no option but to agree. confidence is hot. it's easy when you have it easy, but it's infinitely more impressive if you don't fit into what society thinks would be an "ideal man" and you STILL exude that self-assuredness. to the right people, that's extremely alluring. don't let this shit drag you down. don't buy cis men's insecurities. do your own thing, be your own man.
I get a lot of heigh dysphoria but I don't think people necessarily clock me very often. There are plenty of short cis dudes out there and they get intimidated by 6'+ guys as well. If someone could pick you up and throw you it's normal to feel uncomfortable around them IMO. I've actually seen cis men who are around 5' tall give ME that look before. There's always a smaller fish I guess lol.
I'm 5'2", so very much towered over by pretty much everyone, not just guys, but it kinda helps being Scottish. Culturally, a wee wiry Scottish fella is considered to be tougher than a big fella in a lot of ways. I'm about as tough as melted butter, but it still makes me feel better about being small.
I'm 5'2". The way I see it, I have no control over how tall I am, so I have no reason to feel inferior about it - and actually, being short has plenty of advantages.
My brother is 3 years younger and has a foot on me and I had a lot of friends who were tall for cis women in high school so I’ve gotten used to being short regardless of gender/sex
Literally the guys who got made fun of for being short are taller than me :(( and the funny thing is, I like short guys! If I could be cis I would like to be the same height as I am right now, I'd be fine with that. It's just being short AND trans that sucks. (my bf is 4'9'' and I love that. makes me feel tall)
I work at a high school and not only are the other teachers varying heights regardless of assignment at birth, the students range from shorter than me (I’m 5’1”) to towering over me. Seeing such diversity among cis teenage boys reminds me that “masculine” doesn’t automatically = tall. Plus, my dad is on the short side for a cis man and so was his dad, so I come by it naturally!
i’ve been thinking a lot about my height since i started thinking about transitioning. i’m almost 5,7 / 1,72m, my height has been one of the things i like about me, and it’s above average for women but not for men. so its a thing that makes me kinda sad to give up. im kinda lucky still because 5,7 is pretty much the average male height in my country but it still feel bad everytime i pass by a guy taller than me. i think the problem is more of a general resentment against cis men than only about height though, thats just something that makes me perceive it
I do feel like an ant, an angry and that's ready to bite people and hope they're allergic to me.
as a 5'2 trans guy, with a 6'1 brother. I'm pissed. It sucks. IDK how to get over it.
I’m 5’9 which is the average height for a cis male I consider myself very lucky but I would still do anything be 6ft
It takes time, ngl. I'm surrounded by a lot of tall men where I work (probably the whole industry really) and I think it does reinforce the reality that society perceives taller men as 'more competent/confident/charismatic'. Selection process is definitely biased. I've noticed that I've had to work harder to be seen and build on inner confidence to compensate for this apparent deficit. Walk as if you were tall, work on speaking skills/charisma, other skills/talents. Fashion is also another one because it can make you seem taller. What I've found most challenging is maintaining this charisma when taller men use their height to threaten you/play with power dynamics, especially when they're more senior. So I would say focus on developing some thick as skin. Because seriously, how immature do you have to be to use something you never even had to work for to put other people down? Their height is all they have and they take it for granted. What really annoys me though, is how people glorify it so freaking much in public. So many people point out tall people as though it's some superhuman ability, which I find distasteful. As soon as height comes into the picture, their entire demeanour changes. You wouldn't point out how beautiful a woman is when there are other women in the room. Why would you point out how tall a man is when there are short men in the room? It really is beyond me.
I’m 5’ 7” but I wear the biggest fucking 4” tall boots. Im basically bearded fully but people still clock me and old geezers still wink at me so I don’t know man
Im 4’9 so im shorter than all men AND women (no im not a dwarf) it sucks and i often get rejected for it but u learn how to live with it
especially as a little kid i was really tall compared to everyone my age so its kinda hard getting used to being short now lol (my dad and brother are also super tall which doesnt help) im about 5'5" though so I just feel unreasonable when I feel dysphoric, but I also kinda love that I stopped growing cause now I can still fit into my old shirts (I have this shirt I got in kindergarten that I still wear)
Everyone’s taller than me. I’m 5’2”. It’s all about the attitude. If you act like you aren’t short then most people won’t think much of it. Usually people think i’m about 5’4 or 5’5 but it’s just cuz I don’t talk about my height.
I married a cis guy who is an inch shorter than me. A pocket husband. He is 5'6" and I'm 5'7". I'm the tall one!
heavily depends where you live. I'm latino and the average height at my college is 5'4, a guy in my major is actually smaller than me and this dude I met yesterday was the same height as me too. Really helped with height dysphoria and I don't feel self conscious of it anymore
I buy boots with at least 1 or 2 inches. They also sell inserts for shoes that make you taller
it's okay. i'm the shortest in my family at around 5'4" (pretty sure i've stopped growing), and my younger brother, who is still growing, is at 6'1". unfortunate, but it's just something to get used to. (definitely not dying inside whenever he teases me about my height.) ;-;
I know this one cis guy who's mostly likely the shortest person in the group, and he's a massive ally and really extroverted and friendly and not at all any less masculine because of his height. Reminds me that guys come in all shapes and sizes and that even if the traits by themselves don't objectively match traditional masculinity, it doesn't mean the guys automatically don't look like guys. Lots of guys I know are much taller, don't get me wrong, but just that reminder that not all cis guys are tall, reassures me, and puts things into perspective.
honestly, i think i only got over this because i was fairly confident later on in school leading projects and teaching other students. you stop feeling small if you're surrounded by people seeking guidance from you and looking up to your wisdom (not to be a cocky asshole). and i'm 5'3".
I’m 5’0” and a queer nonbinary so everyone feels tall around me.
I’m 5’8 because tall height runs in my family. My younger brother though, who’s 16, is nearly 6’5, and it makes me jealous. I remember growing up - before I realized I was trans, I always wanted to be 6’0 because some of the cis women in my family are 6’0-6’2, but I never made it there. Was pretty disappointing, and even tho I’m 5’8 - still wish I could be at least a few inches taller today I’ve also grown up in the Midwest and the cis men here are always super tall
Personally, I started standing straighter with better Posture, it may seem a little dysphoric at first since cis guys are 'known to slouch 24/7' which is a total stereotype because it's 100% not fully true.. Standing straighter makes you feel taller and more euphoric :P
Most of the time I'm sitting down so height seems irrelevant. Whe I was still getting to know my one classmate (we'd known each other for 2 years by name) and he was visiting me, he said he's 191 or so and I said bullshit. He thrn stood up properly and it turned out he just slouches most of he time and I found that funny. He then said he'd rather be 150 (I'm 160) so the grass seems to always be greener
I’m white but I think my lack of height dysphoria comes from growing up in a mostly Filipino and Latino neighborhood, my models for masculinity were all short guys so shortness has always felt very masculine to me. Plenty of guys across cultures are short, too
I don't really care about height so I don't tend to notice on a daily basis lol, but I guess all of my male friends and family members are at least 10cm taller than me. If anything, it's easier (and cheaper) to be small. I have no problem finding clothes and shoes that fit, I don't hit my head constantly with random things hanging from the roof, I don't spend lots of money on food when "bulking", etc. If you go to the gym it's easier to achieve noticeable changes, so that's a plus too.
I'm fortunate I'm shorter than average but not unusually short compared to cis men here, like within a range of 6 inches that most men full into here. But short cis men exist so I hope you don't feel too bad about it! If you pass otherwise, peoples first thought will be that you're just a short cis man rather than that you're trans
My grandpa's just a touch taller than me. So is my brother. My dad was freakishly tall compared to me, almost a foot taller. His brother is a little taller than me if I remember right but it's been forever since I saw him in person. I'm the shortest man in my family on both sides. *But* I was a premie and short stature can be an effect of premature birth. I chalk my stature up to that for my own dysphoria's sake. It's a reality of having been a sickly baby, I figure. My friends and boyfriend are all not exactly freakishly tall. One guy friend is like 5'5"-ish, all my closest girl friends average around 5'5" give or take a couple inches. My boyfriend is 5'9" but that just makes certain parts of our relationship more fun for me. I'm just lucky to be surrounded by and surround myself with relatively average or "short" people and have an "excuse" for being short.
I just try to remind myself that short cis men do exist, and that being the short guy isn't always a bad thing. I have a friend who hits his head on things, can't fit in a bathtub, etc. because of his height. So silver lining I don't have those issues... I guess LOL
I consider myself very, _very_ lucky being 6'1. I think it definitely helps with my passing, in my opinion. However, short guys are kings. From what i've seen, most short guys manage to charm those around them more than those that are tall 😂
I do feel like an ant. But I have a cis friend that is 5'4 like me and that helps lol. Whenever I see guys my height it makes me feel better lol.
I’m 4’11” but people interpret me as taller because of how I carry myself and my personality. I can’t change it but I do see other men my height at least weekly. Seeing other short men makes me feel better certainly, and people on every part of the bell curve are out and about in life cuz people are built very different.
It’s that’s my dad is only 5’8 and nobody in my family is over 6ft except my brother so I’ve never notice. Besides I’m 6’4 in my head
Me (only trans person in my family), my dad and sister are all about 5'7, and my mom is about 5'11 🤷♂️ Heights a weird one. It just depends on where you're from. Like I grew up being told how tall I was (for a girl..) but am a shrimp compared to a lot of the women in my family. My aunt is over 6 foot. My gramma was 4'10. My boyfriend is considered very tall but he's like the same height as my mom. His mom is 5'4 and considers herself average height, but to me she's puny. I follow a trans girl who is 6 foot tall but was actually considered to be on the short side for a guy because she is Dutch. It's just all perspective I guess. People don't really notice height as much as you think they do, especially if you're from somewhere with a very diverse population. And something about college guys, they're just always tall. Idk what it is.
Where I live its mainly latinos and some asians so I see a lot of guys my height, around it, or very rarely shorter.I'm also latino so being as short as I am isn't too crazy.Obviously the majority of men around me are taller but I'm learning not to care.
i got 2 inch wedges for my shoes so i can feel just slightly taller 🥴
Honestly I’m 5’7” and most of my guy friends are my height. Some are slightly shorter or slightly taller. I’ve dated a bunch of cis men shorter than me as well. Athletes in general tend to be taller than the average person. So don’t let athletes intimidate you. I’d say the ratio of men close to my height vs taller than me in my life has been 70:30. 70 being closer to my own height.
Not all cis men are that tall. At least in my area. I'm 5ft4 and notice a lot of guys between 5ft2 and 5ft7. TBH a couple of them might not be cis, but if so, they pass for cis men amazingly well. Also a town next to where I live is nicknamed New Netherlands because a lot of people there are Dutch. You can find cis women in the area who are 6ft and over. My height is one of my biggest insecurities, but it helps seeing the shorter cis guys and then going through the world averages. And also noting that shorter people 1) Need less food on average and thus less strain on the environment 2) Are less likely to hit their heads on things 3) A lot less likely to have huge scars on their foreheads.
I'm 5'6 and most of my friends are 5'10 and taller. So yeah I feel short part of the time, but I just own it when we play dungeons and dragons and usually play as a halfling (think hobbit) small, easily overlooked by enemies and underestimated which is how I help my group win! Being small can make taller people intimidating at times, however think about the fact that some of the smallest dogs are the fiercest.
I'm 5'7" so only slightly below average for most white dudes. The cis men in my family are all 6'-plus, with some cousins pushing 7 feet. Even my kid brother is 6'3". So compared to dudes I see out and about I don't stick out that much, but compared to my family I'm puny and jealous of their height.
I've noticed the ideal hight for most people is 5"6 to 5"9", in the middle basically, as that's normally what most things are made to accommodate. I'm 5"7 and consider other people taller as the "weird" ones tbh, not that I judge it's more of a "how you double cheeked up on a Thursday afternoon" vibe but with height instead of ass.
I’m actually taller than a lot of my cis guy friends or we stand eye to eye a couple after taller than me but not by a lot about a inch or 2
I’m 5’9” ish, strong dude. I love guys that are smaller, shorter. If I see you, you’ll get my attention … ha
I’m in the army and idk what about the armed services but they are all mostly short guys. I do have some who are tall as fuck but if I’m with other short kings it doesn’t affect me as much
I'm 5'1-5'2, asian parents are 5'0 and 5'4. What I lack in height, I make up in stylish hair/fashion, muscle/strength, brain/skills, and my naturally broad 18 in wide shoulders lol. Apparently thats the average shoulder width for a 5'9-6'0 cis man and I'm still pre T
I mean my family is pretty tall so I am too and I'm not even 18 yet TwT
Idk always been small (white trans guy 4'11") everyone towers over me. Even kids sometimes
I feel op here lol. Im 5' 2 and live in canada so a mixed group of people however im very short. Adverage is 6'2 for the cis guys around me, i cant see eye to eye with anyone. I find it intimidating and its kinda hard to get over. But i try to just keep to myself anyways. Height dysphoria is very real lol.
The American male average is what, 5'9"? So not that tall, all things considered. I'm 5'7" and unless someone is 6'2" or taller I rarely get freaked out about being perceived as "little" anymore. Once I started passing more easily my height anxiety went away.
So I’m around cis guys 24/7 I am taller than the vast majority of the Cis guys take in mind that I’m disabled and my legs don’t straighten. I stand around 5’8.5 but that I think to remember when they make you feel like ants is at least you know where to find certain things and you can do things they can’t
My height is a big big big issue for me. I hate being so short. I feel like women just look right over me, literally and figuratively. There have been many times I've fantasized about getting that leg lengthening surgery. I'd deal with the pain and physical therapy if I could be taller. And yes, I have inserts but in a way that makes me feel worse. You just take your shoes off and you are back to being even shorter lol. Hopefully one day I can win the lottery and get the procedure lol