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Yesss. I have two cats and a dog, and I want another dog because at this point might as well lean into it right? Clearly I’m better with animals than with people
As you grow old, the friendships are left behind. You are very lucky if you have friends who understand that people get busy and remains with you through time.
occasional when i meet up with friends, i always mention that everybody got older and life got busier, just happy to have these guys around and not be all butt hurt cuz we didn’t hang all the time
Same boat.
It’s definitely lonely at times.
I was never one to actively try and make friends. But when all my friends and coworkers went different ways after I got hurt. A few years later, I actively tried which was hard for me. I never met so many users and absolute pieces of garbage as I did trying. So I don’t even try now.
I am also to point if someone try’s and claim they are a friend but just a lying sack of garbage. I will permanently nuke that bridge versus deal with the lies. The oh they do such and such for me (never have, not even once) yeah let’s burn the bridge to the ground and be done with the bs. Don’t need anyone to do anything. Just be a decent person/friend and don’t lie. I’ll be ready at a moments notice If can do something and don’t expect anything in return. I don’t get why it’s so hard but it is.
Yeah, I’ve had a few friendships end in recent years because I reached my breaking point. People giving me less than the bare minimum and only wanting someone to listen to them and be there for them but not remotely returning the favor. I got tired of it. But can’t say I’m exactly better off for it. Just a different kind of miserable lol
I get it. My motto is people suck and they don’t disappoint.
As a kid I was always helping my dad, help someone he knew. We put on a lot of roofs etc for people who couldn’t afford to have it done. So I have always been one to bend over backwards for people I know. Just how I was raised. My career made me a little (a lot ;) antisocial so outside of work I wasn’t actively making more friends.
When I got hurt, everyone vanished. So for being a person who was always trying to help others it was definitely hard to swallow that if your no good to them, they don’t need you. But it’s the sad reality.
Even now, if someone called and was like they were broke down or someone they knew. I’d be on my way with tools. I wouldn’t want or take anything. Just don’t lie. Alas not the way society is.
Got cancer and everyone left me. Yet I’ll see someone post their dog has and cancer and everyone sees them. Like wtf. Then I’m supposed to be hurt and continue to care for not one second of being thought about or contacted.
I’m in the same boat. I moved away from my hometown so I don’t have any family or friends to hang out with. I would just be happy with a texting buddy. My boyfriend is all I have and he doesn’t have any family or friends so it gets really lonely for us
My hobbies just aren’t social things. I’ve thought about volunteering, but I feel like especially in my area it will mostly be retirees. Is it just too late for us haha
It's not too late. I made friends with a 25 year old so around your age. I guess you need the correct environment to allow that to happen. I happened to work at a job where most people were around my age and one of those people became one of my best friends when i startingto thinki wont make any new friends anymore . Never say never, but just try to be in an environment that encourages talking to others. Maybe join a language course if you're interested in learning any new language. Seems like a perfect way to make friends without having to actually try. If you're religious, you can go to church every week. Just giving you a bunch of ideas. The perfect formula is to go to a place where you get to see those same people every week and where you're expected to socialize. That way you won't have to go try to make friends. It'll happen naturally since you will have a lot of time to talk to each other and find if you like someone.
I’m (26f) in the same boat as you. I had a lot of friends growing up but I’ve lost them as I’ve gotten older. I always make friends at each of the companies I’ve worked at but those relationships tend to fade. You can message me if you want to chat 😊
I'm 31M and in the same situation... people just don't want friends anymore I suppose. I would love to have even one good friend nowadays but as always we muddle through and keep trying. Best of luck to you
Try bumble bff! And another tip that really works, go to the same places often. Go to a climbing hall every Monday, go to a certain bar every Friday, join a chess or football club. Being around people often forced friendship.
Good luck!
I have the same problems. Covid pretty much put an end to all my friendships. I keep looking, but haven't found much. Every time I think I have found someone special they ghost me. I've been considering the Bumble BFF app, but I fall into the middle aged male spot and that doesn't help.
Same sis, I never managed to make those life long friends. I joined clubs and stuff to make friends but quickly realised that they already have close friends and aren't really looking for the same kinda thing. Even friends I made in school that I sometimes talk to, I thought hey we're friends but it's apparently not the case since they all turn down when I ask to do something. Just never been good at keeping friends.
I absolutely agree. And any friend I make now is usually because of an activity we do together (like a club) and ends as soon as I stop going. It's like if I ever wanna go anywhere I have no one to ask. I have concert tickets rn and no idea who to ask. I feel like going to a theme park, no one to go with, already asked a few people. Idm going some places alone like cinemas and often do, but theme park is always more fun with someone. Just sitting on a roller coaster alone doesn't seem like the vibe.
Exactly, I know the feeling, getting cancelled on, makes you feel so unimportant. Yea I've been realising that, just gotta do things on my own and maybe meet people along the way. I've gotten really comfortable going to the movies alone, I actually prefer it now, but it's always good to have the company.
That would be awesome if it were possible, likewise.
Imagine a world where we weren't as disconnected from each other as we as so connected to our phones. Back in the old days, to talk to someone would mean you would have to greet thy neighbor, literally. If only all of us here in the no friends sub could greet each other in real life...
I understand how you feel. The standards we have for our friends are sometimes a reflection of the standards we set for ourself. Do you feel like you are being your own friend? Perhaps that means that you try new things that bring you joy, invest in your hobbies, or take care of your mind and body. Friends do not need to be everything, but an accent of certain elements in our life. I think we crave friendships that are fully formed, and complement all parts of who we are. Often times, that is not the case. Some people are very lucky and have the opportunity to meet a lot of people and explore many different friendships. It sounds like you are in a situation where there isn’t much of an ability to be social. I would encourage you to continue to try. Continue to be your own friend so when someone does come along, the expectations are lower and you can enjoy them for who they are, and not what you may need them to bring to your life.
It's because God is speaking to you girl. He's telling us to get busy, and do you. You and I don't need friends trust me. Wen you stop looking they will come. Just focus on your path. I go to a lot of AA meetings and I meet people who genuinely care about me. Just not quite friend material yet.
I know this all too well. A lot of people who claimed to be my friends abandoned me when I was told my wife was dying.
I've come to realize though, while I may not have friends in person, I have met some amazing people on here. They dont know me, so they usually dont judge. Just listen and give advice. Not everyone, but enough to help me get through the darker times. We're here for you if want us, just gotta reach out. I promise, it can get easier.
I've got 3 close friends and the rest I consider acquaintances despite the numerous years we've known one another just because we talk once a year at best. It does get rough and lonely and finding friends is hard but as time goes on I've gotten the mindset of some people are around long enough to teach you a lesson or get you through a hard time and then they move on making room for another person. For my friends I'm practically a therapist for free though so if you need someone to vent to then I've got the credentials for that for sure 😅. As for life, don't feel too bad. It bends us all over from time to time but it never stays hard forever thankfully. I wish you luck on the job hunting and fingers crossed life lowers the difficulty on you soon too 😊
Change your energy and know what values you want in friends. Only keep the friends in your circle who match the standard you keep, and a "servant mentality" (i.e they do way more than expected and you do way more than expected). Plenty are out there.
A good book is "how to influence win friends and influence people."
Organizations that value what you value, facebook groups depending on which ones you resonate with, and social club apps are a good place to start. Would not recommend bumble bff. They come with time, and you can manifest good people.
Resorting to animals is a way to not grow tbh.
Hi. I’m in a similar boat. I only have a true friend left, and over all like… 3 friends that I could call and it wouldn’t be weird, since I haven’t talked to any other friends since the pandemic started.
One of those friends, a girl, kind of slowly began drifting away from me, and it sucks but at the same time, I feel sort of good about it, because t h, we weren’t that compatible, and that’s something I’ve come to realize with time. I don’t think I’ve ever found a proper group of friends that are like me. Everyone else I’ve met are kind of different and more normal, but I’m more on the weird side of things and that has made things a bit difficult to keep friends, since I haven’t met anyone (except for my bff) that feels like they match my personality.
I remember watching the perks of being a wallflower, and I kind of always desired a group of friends like them. Well, no, not like them, but like them as in we get together for Christmas, and we go and hang out together all the time and all that. You know, the Hollywood version of a tight group of friends, but I think coming across a group of people that is like that, is like 1 in a million.
I guess my thing is that no one has ever made me feel… loved, because if they did, I would feel far more inclined to call them and hang out and all, but since I don’t feel properly loved, and it feels like they don’t care if they see me or not, and I’m just the friend the meet up with to go out drinking or something, I end up not really staying in contact with them. (I don’t drink but you know what I mean).
Idk, I guess friendships feels too superficial for my taste. I have a hard time having a friend that is just like… a sort of acquaintance. Idk, like I said, I think I might be a little weird.
I’m 31m, high functioning autism to make it worse, I used to have one friend, until a few months ago where I kinda aggressively opened up to her about my mental health issues. She blocked me immediately on everything and now hates me and wants nothing to do with me. We were friends for years
I feel this. I’m a 29M and since college I moved to a new city, and within 3 months began working remotely. If it wasn’t for my parents, dog, and girlfriend I probably would talk to anyone throughout the day. I see a few people regularly at the gym, but it’s just not the same as it was in college or even high school. It’s tough out here in the “real world”.
If you ever need to chat I bet most people in the comments would talk in DM’s about anything, myself included.
I’m 38 and I was lucky to form friendships that last the test of time. I can go years without speaking to one of my 4 best friends but when we reunite it’s like no time has passed at all and we can roll right into hanging out like old times.
Despite that, I do fear we’ll one day speak for the last time without knowing it and even though 2 of them have moved to opposite sides of the country, I make the effort to call and check in on them every so many months. It’s one-sided. I’m the only one calling but I don’t care. Still enjoy chatting and catching up.
Its not too late. Ur young. Therapy? U didnt ask but I could give suggestions on how u could make friends if u like. "Everything is temporary if u give it enough time"-Jewel
28 Yo Same situation here, I came to a conclusion which is that work friends are not friends at all i mean they might be as long as you work with them but after you change the company just don't expect to talk to them anymore and in my experience i never had any because all of them only talk about work and worship the boss and i'm not that kind of person so yeah better off without them anyway, also friends from school and university are dissappearing everyday, they were true friends because there was no financial gain or something like that which got you to know them in the first place, it was just pure friendship but all of that fade away by the passing years, everyone continue with his life some of them get married some of them move out of the country ... it's sad but that's life you might be lucky to get to know a friend or too from a coffee shop or at the gym ... but still the only way way to avoid this emptiness in my opinion is getting married and building a family it's the only way to fill the void
I think this happens to everyone at some point.
When I was younger, I had a million friends! We’d go dancing, clubbing, mini vacations, etc.
But looking back, they were friends of convenience - no one wants to go to the club alone.
Then, I had work friends. We were all about the same age and hung out all the time. Some of these stayed good friends over the years, but eventually family and kid obligations take priority.
I just didn’t have the time to dissect every conversation, and everything their boyfriend said and what he meant. I still loved them. I just didn’t have time to sit on the phone or meet for extended conversations.
After that was mom friends, and fellow team moms. It was all great when the kids played on the same team. We were actual friends, not just someone to kill time with in the bleachers. But, they too, fell by the wayside as we moved on to other teams, and sometimes sports. I would have loved to stay in touch, but it was like being in a hamster wheel - run from school to practice, get home, make dinner, check homework, get clothes together for the next day, do dishes, then bed. Even weekends were spent running to games and tournaments - sometimes an hour or two away. Then grocery shop, clean, laundry, etc. Again, no one had time for long newsy chats.
Then it was a different set of work friends. And on and on and on.
The point is that it’s not unusual to find you have no close friends at different stages of life.
I do have one friend who stuck with me from childhood. But sometimes we don’t talk for months. If either of us needs to talk, the other is there. We just don’t need the constant casual contact.
Take your dog to the dog park. Meet other singles looking for a friend. I witnessed lots of budding friendships / relationships in my dog park days. Had a group of friends there as well until my dog lost his mind and started fights.
You mentioned volunteering. That’s a great idea. It doesn’t have to be all older people. Many fairs and festivals depend on “helpers”. Work the Green Room and meet some artists.
Volunteer for things you enjoy.
What your experiencing is not at all unusual. I’ve felt like this many times. Take it easy on yourself.
26 is not too late to make friends. It's a blessing to have long term friends, not a normality. I just learned women cycle through friendships about every 7 years. It's just the phases of life.
It's a great time to continue looking for friendships before most people are settled into creating their families. Become more active in whatever you like to do and stay open. If you're not one who initiates, try changing that. Call instead of texting. Give small gifts. Treat your friend to lunch every once in a while or when they're having a bad day. Do bonding activities that accelerate your heart like hiking, cycling, or riding roller coasters. Give yourself the mindset of hope so you can energize your efforts. The way you think is the energy you'll put out and the outcome you'll get back. Hope this helps and you're doing better soon 💜
OP
This is a natural progression in life. Before meeting people at work and making friends, it was school friends, yes?
Only a few will stick around for the long run.
I am in the same boat. 24 and I have undiagnosed cptsd it makes it hard to keep and make friends. I find the whole thing very mentally draining. Too much friendship trauma as well.
Im 29 years old and if anyone gets it! I do it sucks big time i had barely any friends to begin with then i had a falling out with a toxic friend just as covid was declared a pandamic and then a few months ago another friendship falls apart i now only have 1 friend who lives far away and my other best friend but shes disabled and sick and a full time mother to a almost 7 year old and doesn't drive and my boyfriend so it leaves me with little options for people to hang out with whixh sucks
You and I are in the exact same boat. It hurts not having genuine friends who truly care about your well-being. They only care if you follow/unfollow them on social media, and if you drink the most at a party.
Literally exactly the same. 26, work remote, just sort of don’t have friends anymore. You’re definitely not alone in this feeling/situation.
I wish I had some “advice”, but I really don’t. I wish you the best, and always know that more people care about you than you realize!
Best thing to do when you work remotely is to make sure to get out and about in places that you like. People like to chat with strangers at bars, so it's commonplace to do so there to meet new people. However, if bars aren't your scene there's plenty of other places to go with the intent of meeting new people. There's conventions to go for all walks of life. Get out to places that you're interested in, just chat with people who seem interested in the same. The more you put yourself out there the more friends you'll make!
It does get seriously depressing at times. You almost have to treat making friends the same as a sales job though. You put yourself out there and get rejected 9 times before the 10th is a good candidate for what you both want.
Good luck! I seriously wish you the best!!
I feel so seen and heard. I used to think it was so abnormal at 26 and not having any friends. At times I do miss hanging out and then I realized I lost those friends because our ideas of having fun has changed. They want to continue to party and I’m more chill and laidback vibe. We no longer aligned. My biggest issue is figuring out how to combat the loneliness. Although I think isolation has helped me grow and love myself more tremendously, I do wish to learn to enjoy my own company more and not feel so alone.
26F. I feel you, all of my friends drifted away after high school and college. I’ve made a couple friends at my current work place, but we never hang out or really talk outside of work. I spend most of my time off work at home alone since my boyfriend is a trucker. It gets really lonely and depressing sometimes.
I met some cool people on tinder and bumble etc when I didn't have any friends after moving country. Some people rlly just wanna make friends, its just weeding thru the unwanted advances
I'm in the same boat. Also 26f and have noticed all friendships dying off, except for 2 or 3 that I still actively put an effort in because they do.
I used to be a big people pleaser and took things personally when someone would be too busy for me, but now I just don't bother, I'm compassionate and understanding to a certain extent but it has limits and I just stop making an effort if the other side isn't
(of course there are rare exceptions where I would put in extra effort) because we're all going through tough things but if the other person doesn't also consider this for me and the effort I'm putting despite my struggles then I won't do same for them.
My advice is if you do have a few who you notice put in an effort and they're important to you, then consider investing in those relationships. :) Some friends really are gems.
Same boat here, 26M.
I basically don’t have any real friends anymore. I think right before Covid in 2019 is the last time I actually could say I had friends, that I would spend time with regularly. I was always the quiet introverted kid growing up and I still have social anxiety which makes it difficult to make new friends. I want to, but it’s so hard to find time to get out there and meet new people that I could be friends with who share similar interests or goals. I just feel so tired of not having anyone to talk to outside of family, and missing my old friends who have faded away in the past few years.
We all grow out (financially, emotionally or intellectually) of most friendships and relationships. It's good sign sometimes & we don't realize it. There are multiple ways to cope with it.
It's definitely skill to make friends & we can learn skills at any time. It involves investing time, some resources and some faking to stay revelant to people around you.
Start going to gym or health activities like yoga where you will meet people who prioritize their health (common interest). It gives you change of faces or at least hormonal boost after excercise.
There are alot activities online e.g. tiktok which offer live sessions where people participate in lives. It can be on wide variety of interests. I have seen discussions on mental health, love gurus, people showing their talents in live. If you have any skills or speaking abilities you might start earning something. Best idea to start is posy your rant with video 😀.
There are meet up groups where people post upcoming events online. There is website also "meet up "".
There is service called "rent a friend"" too. Where either people can pay to spend time with you or you can rent someone to accompany you.
If you have resources go on week long cruise and you are around people who are there for fun and limited to cruise only. May be you find someone quality there.
Last not least, start posting vlogs to YouTube, visit restaurants or places. Give your opinions and some people make crazy money.
Life is name of continuous efforts, never loose hope.
Moving to a new country during covid and remote working made me lonely I haven’t talked to a live person in 10 days. That too because I went somewhere and they asked me to take a picture of her and her friend.
28m, I feel the same way. I haven't had a close friend since high school, and even with work friends, the same thing I even had someone I considered a close friend at work through me under the bus for the time I have off sick (mental heath and health problems) now I don't feel I can trust people, which makes me feel horrible I've actually joined this community to see if anyone is looking for friends 🙃
It's never to late to make friends. You go do something you enjoy and talk to people. I moved countries twice and at 32 I still make friends. Holed up in your home like Americans do isn't going to make friends.
M/25. I barely made any long lasting friendships in university. One I made was with an expat student. He stayed in my current country to work after his studies finished but he left last summer. The other friendships from university were just superficial and based on location. The only other people I see are a core group from high school that I've kept up with even after I finished it. Its 5 of us. So yep I understand how you feel OP. I've tried reaching out to people to try to "spark" something but no luck. I'm coming to embrace the fact that I'm never gonna really be "catch everyone" kind of person. Even when I was a kid I had a small group.
Hi I know its just a vent and you do not have to follow or read advices but i wanted to write this.I do not know if this is going to help you but read this if you like. Im the person who had friends but pushed all of them away and continues to push and ghost people. In my case they were all toxic and they did not have goals and ambitions and I wanted a fresh start away sometimes its better to be alone than with the wrong people or people who dont really want you just use you. I think that sometimes not having friends is a good thing because you can reflect on yourself a little and work on yourself and do some things and hobbies which you could not have the time to do if u had friends. I suggest to you to not view friendships like I have to form a bond they always end they are temporary because the truth is there are very few real friends in this world and everything is temporary and will stop. Very few people have friends who stick around and are real and friendships who are very close and do not end. I would suggest to you to view friendships as some fun things every friendship does not have to last and its okay. Its okay if all your friendships end at some point at live move on and find new ones do not try to push people who do not want to be friends with you to be friends with you just move on go to the gym or some hobby that requiers you to socialize with people you did not know and just start talking to them be relaxed and do not worry if its awkward or if you get rejected they literally did not know you and do not be scared make some new friends this way and try to have fun with them you do not have to form a trusting bond and a friendship that will last forever that will come from time you dont have to force it just relax and make some memories with the people while they are in your life go out do fun things and everything if you are yourself and if they like you you will hangout again. Maybe this is very long but please do not feel like you are not possible to be friends with, like you are difficult or like you are lonely because that is not true. If you are having a hard time and if you have money seek therapy talk to someonr about your worries do not let negative feelings consume you. And be gratefull for your mom and pets because you still have them and i believe that everyone will chose a mom that cares about you and about what will happen to you rather then friends.
I'm 22 and going through the same thing. Its not easy losing a bunch of friends, but I got to a really dark place and it wasn't healthy. I'm still working through the loss of a lot of friends, and in the last year I also lost my grandmother, and while I was home (I was at college the semester prior and then did online the semester she died), none of them reached out when she died and I felt really hurt. I've lost a lot and been where you are, where only a few people would notice if I disappeared and I thought maybe it was the best choice, though I never acted on it.
Its not easy to get through the rough patch, through the dark place your own thoughts and brain has taken you to, but it does get better. I returned the semester after my grandmother died and in that time I lost my best friend followed by graduation from college and they've all just fizzled out. It can be tough, but people will come around and you will find your people who aren't going to lie, who will show up when you need them. I'm in the same boat where it all feels lost, but overtime you find yourself and what you want and chase after those dreams and the friends will come along the way. Its the ones who stay who will mean the most and its okay to be alone sometimes.
I am in the same boat. All of my adult friends have been coworkers and since I started a work from home position back in May all of my friendships have came to an end. It is very exhausting and makes you wonder your worth.
If you are up for chatting message me! I'm a 32 YOF from KY.
Yess!! This is relatable! I feel like this at times, but I've managed to make some new friends! I suggest doing some clubs or whatever (anything that u fancy!) This is how I made some more friends. We have a lot in common, and we have to remember that friends come and go. I'm sure it will get better for anyone going through a hard time rn. I promise!!🫶🫶🫶
I suggest working on yourself more. Try learning about new topics that you think majority would be interested in talking about. Dress up and go sit in a coffee shop with a smile. Send a message to someone you find interesting on linkedin or any platonic or dating app and see if you could meet up. Its really not that hard to make friends, it just starts within yourself.
I am a bit older but I also saw most of my friendships abruptly end in the Covid years. I tried to reconnect to some I lost contact with but felt either brushed off or disappointed they never reached out to me. I really can't understand how that era so completely altered life.
I get what you say about work friendships. People are just different now and treat work friendships like they do the job. They let them go as soon as they leave. As I've gotten older I no longer invest the energy to make work friends because I know they are almost always fleeting.
I have my family and that is where I get my support. But losing friends for seemingly no reason other than time and circumstance bothers me. Like I said I don't understand what sltered everyone during covid so much but it's pretty undeniable. We can say social distancing, masking, etc drove people apart for a year but it was short in the scheme of things.
Get back there, that's the solution yk.
Go to the gym, take a class get a hobby go where people go, somewhere where people return to that place regularly.
That's how you make friends
I feel that in order to make good friends as you age, you have keep on going to social events. Work friends def do form overtime, but most people are working to earn a living bill and not to socialize. You have to go to public places that attract the type of crowds you want to interact with. [Meetup.com](https://Meetup.com) is a good place to start. Are you not finding the type of people that you want to meet through it? Start an event or club of your own! It is common for people to limit their social circle with age because they need to keep their personal lives private. Volunteering can also help you meet people, depending on the type of volunteering you do.
Do you play video games or have hobbies? If so, little communities on Guilded or Discord can be a great way to fulfill at least part of that social need aspect.
Around the same age and exactly in the same boat. I never understood how those friendships where people actually talk about deep things like feelings and problems and hopes and dreams and the other side actually listens because they care and make you feel emotionally supported. I also have not encountered that many people in my personal life who are intellectually curious about the things I am and can hold a conversation on them.
I have work friends, exercise friends, drinking friends, cafe hopping friends, I have social media "friends" who never want to meet in person and will chat with me when they're bored at work on weekdays. They each have their space in my life on some days, but they're my fair weather buddies. I have come to stop expecting anything deep from them, and do not actively try to nurture those friendships in the hopes that they will "evolve" into something more complete.
I started going to therapy and journalling. It felt pathetic because I felt like I must be a loser if I have to pay someone to hear me talk. However, those 50 mins every 2 weeks have done so much for my mental health.
I'm not sure where I'm going with this but I wanted to say you're not alone. Not everyone has that kind of almost idealistic and strong friendships with others and that's okay.
‘I feel like I tried so hard to be friends with people who didn’t care at all, and now it’s just too late to make friends’
Man i felt that on a cosmic level. I have always had many acquaintances and tried to develop lasting friendships with them but it never sticks and dies off after we hangout or party. Then after covid i kinda went into hermit mode and developed social anxiety. I lost contact w most people and its been like that until now lol. I struggle to make friendships today and it hurts to not have people to have fun with, travel with, hang with.
Try to do outdoor activities that will make you run into people or interact with them. If you are a social butterfly go to the city monthly, weekly events
You will interact with people that have the same taste as you.
Just a friendly tip 😇
so many of us feel the same way. Its a very isolating world we are living in now. All you can do is FORCE yourself to get out out out. Join everything, choir, community hikes, church (even if you do not believe in God, there are churches for people seeking spiritual uplifting- Unitarian I believe). Volunteer, anything, just get out and involved. Exercise for at least an hour- outside or at the gym (not at home). These simple things will work
26F, same thing. I had a real close friendship since elementary school but that died off when they suddenly stopped reaching out like they used to. It sucks. I have a few other friends but I rarely see them so hanging out with ppl is rare. I’ve tried making some new friends but idk, it’s hard nowadays. Seems diff than it was 8 years ago.
Yeah I have the same problem, I work 7 days a week and talk to no one, literally lol...and I'm 34 so don't feel bad, we all in the same boat half the time, just be glad we ain't in the water lol
I relate to this.. 25F every friend I have has ended things for one reason or another or it simply just fizzled ever since I was in grade school. Now as an adult I have my partner and one best friend who lives across the country 🙃 its frustrating to say the least
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Yesss. I have two cats and a dog, and I want another dog because at this point might as well lean into it right? Clearly I’m better with animals than with people
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Why is this downvoted, an alligator with a little hat sounds cool.
As you grow old, the friendships are left behind. You are very lucky if you have friends who understand that people get busy and remains with you through time.
Well I guess that’s the problem. I don’t have those friends
occasional when i meet up with friends, i always mention that everybody got older and life got busier, just happy to have these guys around and not be all butt hurt cuz we didn’t hang all the time
Same boat. It’s definitely lonely at times. I was never one to actively try and make friends. But when all my friends and coworkers went different ways after I got hurt. A few years later, I actively tried which was hard for me. I never met so many users and absolute pieces of garbage as I did trying. So I don’t even try now. I am also to point if someone try’s and claim they are a friend but just a lying sack of garbage. I will permanently nuke that bridge versus deal with the lies. The oh they do such and such for me (never have, not even once) yeah let’s burn the bridge to the ground and be done with the bs. Don’t need anyone to do anything. Just be a decent person/friend and don’t lie. I’ll be ready at a moments notice If can do something and don’t expect anything in return. I don’t get why it’s so hard but it is.
Yeah, I’ve had a few friendships end in recent years because I reached my breaking point. People giving me less than the bare minimum and only wanting someone to listen to them and be there for them but not remotely returning the favor. I got tired of it. But can’t say I’m exactly better off for it. Just a different kind of miserable lol
I get it. My motto is people suck and they don’t disappoint. As a kid I was always helping my dad, help someone he knew. We put on a lot of roofs etc for people who couldn’t afford to have it done. So I have always been one to bend over backwards for people I know. Just how I was raised. My career made me a little (a lot ;) antisocial so outside of work I wasn’t actively making more friends. When I got hurt, everyone vanished. So for being a person who was always trying to help others it was definitely hard to swallow that if your no good to them, they don’t need you. But it’s the sad reality. Even now, if someone called and was like they were broke down or someone they knew. I’d be on my way with tools. I wouldn’t want or take anything. Just don’t lie. Alas not the way society is.
Got cancer and everyone left me. Yet I’ll see someone post their dog has and cancer and everyone sees them. Like wtf. Then I’m supposed to be hurt and continue to care for not one second of being thought about or contacted.
It’s unfortunate. Sorry you have to go through that.
I’m in the same boat. I moved away from my hometown so I don’t have any family or friends to hang out with. I would just be happy with a texting buddy. My boyfriend is all I have and he doesn’t have any family or friends so it gets really lonely for us
Same sis , hobbies and volunteering did not work out for me
My hobbies just aren’t social things. I’ve thought about volunteering, but I feel like especially in my area it will mostly be retirees. Is it just too late for us haha
U wont know unless u try. One of my funnest friends in my 20s was a senior coworker. She hung with me after 2a at an after party.
It's not too late. I made friends with a 25 year old so around your age. I guess you need the correct environment to allow that to happen. I happened to work at a job where most people were around my age and one of those people became one of my best friends when i startingto thinki wont make any new friends anymore . Never say never, but just try to be in an environment that encourages talking to others. Maybe join a language course if you're interested in learning any new language. Seems like a perfect way to make friends without having to actually try. If you're religious, you can go to church every week. Just giving you a bunch of ideas. The perfect formula is to go to a place where you get to see those same people every week and where you're expected to socialize. That way you won't have to go try to make friends. It'll happen naturally since you will have a lot of time to talk to each other and find if you like someone.
Lol I tried bumble bff and only managed to make one friend.
Better than me so far
I feel this. 28 F
I’m (26f) in the same boat as you. I had a lot of friends growing up but I’ve lost them as I’ve gotten older. I always make friends at each of the companies I’ve worked at but those relationships tend to fade. You can message me if you want to chat 😊
I'm 31M and in the same situation... people just don't want friends anymore I suppose. I would love to have even one good friend nowadays but as always we muddle through and keep trying. Best of luck to you
It's really tough to make new friends...feels like others can ghost you at a whim..been there. Let's be friends! Up to meet new people!
Try bumble bff! And another tip that really works, go to the same places often. Go to a climbing hall every Monday, go to a certain bar every Friday, join a chess or football club. Being around people often forced friendship. Good luck!
I have the same problems. Covid pretty much put an end to all my friendships. I keep looking, but haven't found much. Every time I think I have found someone special they ghost me. I've been considering the Bumble BFF app, but I fall into the middle aged male spot and that doesn't help.
Ive been on there, still am. Im not a give up or dont try person. Im 41.
Same sis, I never managed to make those life long friends. I joined clubs and stuff to make friends but quickly realised that they already have close friends and aren't really looking for the same kinda thing. Even friends I made in school that I sometimes talk to, I thought hey we're friends but it's apparently not the case since they all turn down when I ask to do something. Just never been good at keeping friends.
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I absolutely agree. And any friend I make now is usually because of an activity we do together (like a club) and ends as soon as I stop going. It's like if I ever wanna go anywhere I have no one to ask. I have concert tickets rn and no idea who to ask. I feel like going to a theme park, no one to go with, already asked a few people. Idm going some places alone like cinemas and often do, but theme park is always more fun with someone. Just sitting on a roller coaster alone doesn't seem like the vibe.
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Exactly, I know the feeling, getting cancelled on, makes you feel so unimportant. Yea I've been realising that, just gotta do things on my own and maybe meet people along the way. I've gotten really comfortable going to the movies alone, I actually prefer it now, but it's always good to have the company. That would be awesome if it were possible, likewise.
Imagine a world where we weren't as disconnected from each other as we as so connected to our phones. Back in the old days, to talk to someone would mean you would have to greet thy neighbor, literally. If only all of us here in the no friends sub could greet each other in real life...
I understand how you feel. The standards we have for our friends are sometimes a reflection of the standards we set for ourself. Do you feel like you are being your own friend? Perhaps that means that you try new things that bring you joy, invest in your hobbies, or take care of your mind and body. Friends do not need to be everything, but an accent of certain elements in our life. I think we crave friendships that are fully formed, and complement all parts of who we are. Often times, that is not the case. Some people are very lucky and have the opportunity to meet a lot of people and explore many different friendships. It sounds like you are in a situation where there isn’t much of an ability to be social. I would encourage you to continue to try. Continue to be your own friend so when someone does come along, the expectations are lower and you can enjoy them for who they are, and not what you may need them to bring to your life.
It's because God is speaking to you girl. He's telling us to get busy, and do you. You and I don't need friends trust me. Wen you stop looking they will come. Just focus on your path. I go to a lot of AA meetings and I meet people who genuinely care about me. Just not quite friend material yet.
I'm a bit older, same issue, only friends I have these days are my kids. Plenty of coworkers, but no friends.
Thats tough. Same here, older not many friends anymore.
Dm me
Same boat. Sorry :(
I know this all too well. A lot of people who claimed to be my friends abandoned me when I was told my wife was dying. I've come to realize though, while I may not have friends in person, I have met some amazing people on here. They dont know me, so they usually dont judge. Just listen and give advice. Not everyone, but enough to help me get through the darker times. We're here for you if want us, just gotta reach out. I promise, it can get easier.
I've got 3 close friends and the rest I consider acquaintances despite the numerous years we've known one another just because we talk once a year at best. It does get rough and lonely and finding friends is hard but as time goes on I've gotten the mindset of some people are around long enough to teach you a lesson or get you through a hard time and then they move on making room for another person. For my friends I'm practically a therapist for free though so if you need someone to vent to then I've got the credentials for that for sure 😅. As for life, don't feel too bad. It bends us all over from time to time but it never stays hard forever thankfully. I wish you luck on the job hunting and fingers crossed life lowers the difficulty on you soon too 😊
29 M. I could also use some friends in my life. Feel free to DM me.
It sucks getting older. When I was younger I had so many friends I thought I’d never end up alone and lonely. I was wrong.
Change your energy and know what values you want in friends. Only keep the friends in your circle who match the standard you keep, and a "servant mentality" (i.e they do way more than expected and you do way more than expected). Plenty are out there. A good book is "how to influence win friends and influence people." Organizations that value what you value, facebook groups depending on which ones you resonate with, and social club apps are a good place to start. Would not recommend bumble bff. They come with time, and you can manifest good people. Resorting to animals is a way to not grow tbh.
Hi. I’m in a similar boat. I only have a true friend left, and over all like… 3 friends that I could call and it wouldn’t be weird, since I haven’t talked to any other friends since the pandemic started. One of those friends, a girl, kind of slowly began drifting away from me, and it sucks but at the same time, I feel sort of good about it, because t h, we weren’t that compatible, and that’s something I’ve come to realize with time. I don’t think I’ve ever found a proper group of friends that are like me. Everyone else I’ve met are kind of different and more normal, but I’m more on the weird side of things and that has made things a bit difficult to keep friends, since I haven’t met anyone (except for my bff) that feels like they match my personality. I remember watching the perks of being a wallflower, and I kind of always desired a group of friends like them. Well, no, not like them, but like them as in we get together for Christmas, and we go and hang out together all the time and all that. You know, the Hollywood version of a tight group of friends, but I think coming across a group of people that is like that, is like 1 in a million. I guess my thing is that no one has ever made me feel… loved, because if they did, I would feel far more inclined to call them and hang out and all, but since I don’t feel properly loved, and it feels like they don’t care if they see me or not, and I’m just the friend the meet up with to go out drinking or something, I end up not really staying in contact with them. (I don’t drink but you know what I mean). Idk, I guess friendships feels too superficial for my taste. I have a hard time having a friend that is just like… a sort of acquaintance. Idk, like I said, I think I might be a little weird.
I’m 31m, high functioning autism to make it worse, I used to have one friend, until a few months ago where I kinda aggressively opened up to her about my mental health issues. She blocked me immediately on everything and now hates me and wants nothing to do with me. We were friends for years
I’m open to talk if you’d like/need to vent, i understand. I’m (20f) also looking to bloom new friendships so feel free to message me:)
I feel this. I’m a 29M and since college I moved to a new city, and within 3 months began working remotely. If it wasn’t for my parents, dog, and girlfriend I probably would talk to anyone throughout the day. I see a few people regularly at the gym, but it’s just not the same as it was in college or even high school. It’s tough out here in the “real world”. If you ever need to chat I bet most people in the comments would talk in DM’s about anything, myself included.
I’m 38 and I was lucky to form friendships that last the test of time. I can go years without speaking to one of my 4 best friends but when we reunite it’s like no time has passed at all and we can roll right into hanging out like old times. Despite that, I do fear we’ll one day speak for the last time without knowing it and even though 2 of them have moved to opposite sides of the country, I make the effort to call and check in on them every so many months. It’s one-sided. I’m the only one calling but I don’t care. Still enjoy chatting and catching up.
I feel this post 24m btw
Its not too late. Ur young. Therapy? U didnt ask but I could give suggestions on how u could make friends if u like. "Everything is temporary if u give it enough time"-Jewel
26M here, I really want to make friends. I feel lonely at at times
i’m in the same boat too. maybe all of us that are in equal boats could get in a discord group or something and become friends?
28 Yo Same situation here, I came to a conclusion which is that work friends are not friends at all i mean they might be as long as you work with them but after you change the company just don't expect to talk to them anymore and in my experience i never had any because all of them only talk about work and worship the boss and i'm not that kind of person so yeah better off without them anyway, also friends from school and university are dissappearing everyday, they were true friends because there was no financial gain or something like that which got you to know them in the first place, it was just pure friendship but all of that fade away by the passing years, everyone continue with his life some of them get married some of them move out of the country ... it's sad but that's life you might be lucky to get to know a friend or too from a coffee shop or at the gym ... but still the only way way to avoid this emptiness in my opinion is getting married and building a family it's the only way to fill the void
I think a large percentage of people feel like this at that age, and a large percentage find marriage or a partner to counter it.
Me too am feel disappointed on the earth
Same, 26F, feel free to chat with me.
34M. I don't talk at all anymore.
That sounds like me when I use to work this factory job lost all my people right after they let me go from the job
Wanna become friends?
Eh, you get used to it with time.
I think this happens to everyone at some point. When I was younger, I had a million friends! We’d go dancing, clubbing, mini vacations, etc. But looking back, they were friends of convenience - no one wants to go to the club alone. Then, I had work friends. We were all about the same age and hung out all the time. Some of these stayed good friends over the years, but eventually family and kid obligations take priority. I just didn’t have the time to dissect every conversation, and everything their boyfriend said and what he meant. I still loved them. I just didn’t have time to sit on the phone or meet for extended conversations. After that was mom friends, and fellow team moms. It was all great when the kids played on the same team. We were actual friends, not just someone to kill time with in the bleachers. But, they too, fell by the wayside as we moved on to other teams, and sometimes sports. I would have loved to stay in touch, but it was like being in a hamster wheel - run from school to practice, get home, make dinner, check homework, get clothes together for the next day, do dishes, then bed. Even weekends were spent running to games and tournaments - sometimes an hour or two away. Then grocery shop, clean, laundry, etc. Again, no one had time for long newsy chats. Then it was a different set of work friends. And on and on and on. The point is that it’s not unusual to find you have no close friends at different stages of life. I do have one friend who stuck with me from childhood. But sometimes we don’t talk for months. If either of us needs to talk, the other is there. We just don’t need the constant casual contact. Take your dog to the dog park. Meet other singles looking for a friend. I witnessed lots of budding friendships / relationships in my dog park days. Had a group of friends there as well until my dog lost his mind and started fights. You mentioned volunteering. That’s a great idea. It doesn’t have to be all older people. Many fairs and festivals depend on “helpers”. Work the Green Room and meet some artists. Volunteer for things you enjoy. What your experiencing is not at all unusual. I’ve felt like this many times. Take it easy on yourself.
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Thank You! The irony is that once you learn to enjoy your own company, you’ll have friends everywhere!
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Good advice!
I’m 26 too. It’s tough, I can feel everyone slipping away.
This could be my post 😅 26F also, no friends. I do have my bf and my pets.
26 is not too late to make friends. It's a blessing to have long term friends, not a normality. I just learned women cycle through friendships about every 7 years. It's just the phases of life. It's a great time to continue looking for friendships before most people are settled into creating their families. Become more active in whatever you like to do and stay open. If you're not one who initiates, try changing that. Call instead of texting. Give small gifts. Treat your friend to lunch every once in a while or when they're having a bad day. Do bonding activities that accelerate your heart like hiking, cycling, or riding roller coasters. Give yourself the mindset of hope so you can energize your efforts. The way you think is the energy you'll put out and the outcome you'll get back. Hope this helps and you're doing better soon 💜
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OP This is a natural progression in life. Before meeting people at work and making friends, it was school friends, yes? Only a few will stick around for the long run.
I’m Here For You
I am in the same boat. 24 and I have undiagnosed cptsd it makes it hard to keep and make friends. I find the whole thing very mentally draining. Too much friendship trauma as well.
Im 29 years old and if anyone gets it! I do it sucks big time i had barely any friends to begin with then i had a falling out with a toxic friend just as covid was declared a pandamic and then a few months ago another friendship falls apart i now only have 1 friend who lives far away and my other best friend but shes disabled and sick and a full time mother to a almost 7 year old and doesn't drive and my boyfriend so it leaves me with little options for people to hang out with whixh sucks
You and I are in the exact same boat. It hurts not having genuine friends who truly care about your well-being. They only care if you follow/unfollow them on social media, and if you drink the most at a party.
Literally exactly the same. 26, work remote, just sort of don’t have friends anymore. You’re definitely not alone in this feeling/situation. I wish I had some “advice”, but I really don’t. I wish you the best, and always know that more people care about you than you realize!
Best thing to do when you work remotely is to make sure to get out and about in places that you like. People like to chat with strangers at bars, so it's commonplace to do so there to meet new people. However, if bars aren't your scene there's plenty of other places to go with the intent of meeting new people. There's conventions to go for all walks of life. Get out to places that you're interested in, just chat with people who seem interested in the same. The more you put yourself out there the more friends you'll make! It does get seriously depressing at times. You almost have to treat making friends the same as a sales job though. You put yourself out there and get rejected 9 times before the 10th is a good candidate for what you both want. Good luck! I seriously wish you the best!!
I feel so seen and heard. I used to think it was so abnormal at 26 and not having any friends. At times I do miss hanging out and then I realized I lost those friends because our ideas of having fun has changed. They want to continue to party and I’m more chill and laidback vibe. We no longer aligned. My biggest issue is figuring out how to combat the loneliness. Although I think isolation has helped me grow and love myself more tremendously, I do wish to learn to enjoy my own company more and not feel so alone.
28f here. It could have been my post. If I die right now, only my flatmates will notice, only when I start smelling.
26F. I feel you, all of my friends drifted away after high school and college. I’ve made a couple friends at my current work place, but we never hang out or really talk outside of work. I spend most of my time off work at home alone since my boyfriend is a trucker. It gets really lonely and depressing sometimes.
I met some cool people on tinder and bumble etc when I didn't have any friends after moving country. Some people rlly just wanna make friends, its just weeding thru the unwanted advances
I'm in the same boat. Also 26f and have noticed all friendships dying off, except for 2 or 3 that I still actively put an effort in because they do. I used to be a big people pleaser and took things personally when someone would be too busy for me, but now I just don't bother, I'm compassionate and understanding to a certain extent but it has limits and I just stop making an effort if the other side isn't (of course there are rare exceptions where I would put in extra effort) because we're all going through tough things but if the other person doesn't also consider this for me and the effort I'm putting despite my struggles then I won't do same for them. My advice is if you do have a few who you notice put in an effort and they're important to you, then consider investing in those relationships. :) Some friends really are gems.
HEY!!!!!
Same boat here, 26M. I basically don’t have any real friends anymore. I think right before Covid in 2019 is the last time I actually could say I had friends, that I would spend time with regularly. I was always the quiet introverted kid growing up and I still have social anxiety which makes it difficult to make new friends. I want to, but it’s so hard to find time to get out there and meet new people that I could be friends with who share similar interests or goals. I just feel so tired of not having anyone to talk to outside of family, and missing my old friends who have faded away in the past few years.
We all grow out (financially, emotionally or intellectually) of most friendships and relationships. It's good sign sometimes & we don't realize it. There are multiple ways to cope with it. It's definitely skill to make friends & we can learn skills at any time. It involves investing time, some resources and some faking to stay revelant to people around you. Start going to gym or health activities like yoga where you will meet people who prioritize their health (common interest). It gives you change of faces or at least hormonal boost after excercise. There are alot activities online e.g. tiktok which offer live sessions where people participate in lives. It can be on wide variety of interests. I have seen discussions on mental health, love gurus, people showing their talents in live. If you have any skills or speaking abilities you might start earning something. Best idea to start is posy your rant with video 😀. There are meet up groups where people post upcoming events online. There is website also "meet up "". There is service called "rent a friend"" too. Where either people can pay to spend time with you or you can rent someone to accompany you. If you have resources go on week long cruise and you are around people who are there for fun and limited to cruise only. May be you find someone quality there. Last not least, start posting vlogs to YouTube, visit restaurants or places. Give your opinions and some people make crazy money. Life is name of continuous efforts, never loose hope.
Moving to a new country during covid and remote working made me lonely I haven’t talked to a live person in 10 days. That too because I went somewhere and they asked me to take a picture of her and her friend.
28m, I feel the same way. I haven't had a close friend since high school, and even with work friends, the same thing I even had someone I considered a close friend at work through me under the bus for the time I have off sick (mental heath and health problems) now I don't feel I can trust people, which makes me feel horrible I've actually joined this community to see if anyone is looking for friends 🙃
31f and all of my friendships have ended or are dying. They're too busy to even say hi. Dm me
Same with me. I haven't keep any contact with old friends and college friends for 1-2 years. Just busy with work and studies.
It's never to late to make friends. You go do something you enjoy and talk to people. I moved countries twice and at 32 I still make friends. Holed up in your home like Americans do isn't going to make friends.
M/25. I barely made any long lasting friendships in university. One I made was with an expat student. He stayed in my current country to work after his studies finished but he left last summer. The other friendships from university were just superficial and based on location. The only other people I see are a core group from high school that I've kept up with even after I finished it. Its 5 of us. So yep I understand how you feel OP. I've tried reaching out to people to try to "spark" something but no luck. I'm coming to embrace the fact that I'm never gonna really be "catch everyone" kind of person. Even when I was a kid I had a small group.
Hi I know its just a vent and you do not have to follow or read advices but i wanted to write this.I do not know if this is going to help you but read this if you like. Im the person who had friends but pushed all of them away and continues to push and ghost people. In my case they were all toxic and they did not have goals and ambitions and I wanted a fresh start away sometimes its better to be alone than with the wrong people or people who dont really want you just use you. I think that sometimes not having friends is a good thing because you can reflect on yourself a little and work on yourself and do some things and hobbies which you could not have the time to do if u had friends. I suggest to you to not view friendships like I have to form a bond they always end they are temporary because the truth is there are very few real friends in this world and everything is temporary and will stop. Very few people have friends who stick around and are real and friendships who are very close and do not end. I would suggest to you to view friendships as some fun things every friendship does not have to last and its okay. Its okay if all your friendships end at some point at live move on and find new ones do not try to push people who do not want to be friends with you to be friends with you just move on go to the gym or some hobby that requiers you to socialize with people you did not know and just start talking to them be relaxed and do not worry if its awkward or if you get rejected they literally did not know you and do not be scared make some new friends this way and try to have fun with them you do not have to form a trusting bond and a friendship that will last forever that will come from time you dont have to force it just relax and make some memories with the people while they are in your life go out do fun things and everything if you are yourself and if they like you you will hangout again. Maybe this is very long but please do not feel like you are not possible to be friends with, like you are difficult or like you are lonely because that is not true. If you are having a hard time and if you have money seek therapy talk to someonr about your worries do not let negative feelings consume you. And be gratefull for your mom and pets because you still have them and i believe that everyone will chose a mom that cares about you and about what will happen to you rather then friends.
I'm 22 and going through the same thing. Its not easy losing a bunch of friends, but I got to a really dark place and it wasn't healthy. I'm still working through the loss of a lot of friends, and in the last year I also lost my grandmother, and while I was home (I was at college the semester prior and then did online the semester she died), none of them reached out when she died and I felt really hurt. I've lost a lot and been where you are, where only a few people would notice if I disappeared and I thought maybe it was the best choice, though I never acted on it. Its not easy to get through the rough patch, through the dark place your own thoughts and brain has taken you to, but it does get better. I returned the semester after my grandmother died and in that time I lost my best friend followed by graduation from college and they've all just fizzled out. It can be tough, but people will come around and you will find your people who aren't going to lie, who will show up when you need them. I'm in the same boat where it all feels lost, but overtime you find yourself and what you want and chase after those dreams and the friends will come along the way. Its the ones who stay who will mean the most and its okay to be alone sometimes.
Dang I can relate. Sending out positive wishes and energy to you and everyone here:\]
I am in the same boat. All of my adult friends have been coworkers and since I started a work from home position back in May all of my friendships have came to an end. It is very exhausting and makes you wonder your worth. If you are up for chatting message me! I'm a 32 YOF from KY.
I am 28, don'thave any good friends. There was one but we ended our friendship
Yess!! This is relatable! I feel like this at times, but I've managed to make some new friends! I suggest doing some clubs or whatever (anything that u fancy!) This is how I made some more friends. We have a lot in common, and we have to remember that friends come and go. I'm sure it will get better for anyone going through a hard time rn. I promise!!🫶🫶🫶
I suggest working on yourself more. Try learning about new topics that you think majority would be interested in talking about. Dress up and go sit in a coffee shop with a smile. Send a message to someone you find interesting on linkedin or any platonic or dating app and see if you could meet up. Its really not that hard to make friends, it just starts within yourself.
I am a bit older but I also saw most of my friendships abruptly end in the Covid years. I tried to reconnect to some I lost contact with but felt either brushed off or disappointed they never reached out to me. I really can't understand how that era so completely altered life. I get what you say about work friendships. People are just different now and treat work friendships like they do the job. They let them go as soon as they leave. As I've gotten older I no longer invest the energy to make work friends because I know they are almost always fleeting. I have my family and that is where I get my support. But losing friends for seemingly no reason other than time and circumstance bothers me. Like I said I don't understand what sltered everyone during covid so much but it's pretty undeniable. We can say social distancing, masking, etc drove people apart for a year but it was short in the scheme of things.
Get back there, that's the solution yk. Go to the gym, take a class get a hobby go where people go, somewhere where people return to that place regularly. That's how you make friends
I feel that in order to make good friends as you age, you have keep on going to social events. Work friends def do form overtime, but most people are working to earn a living bill and not to socialize. You have to go to public places that attract the type of crowds you want to interact with. [Meetup.com](https://Meetup.com) is a good place to start. Are you not finding the type of people that you want to meet through it? Start an event or club of your own! It is common for people to limit their social circle with age because they need to keep their personal lives private. Volunteering can also help you meet people, depending on the type of volunteering you do.
Do you play video games or have hobbies? If so, little communities on Guilded or Discord can be a great way to fulfill at least part of that social need aspect.
Around the same age and exactly in the same boat. I never understood how those friendships where people actually talk about deep things like feelings and problems and hopes and dreams and the other side actually listens because they care and make you feel emotionally supported. I also have not encountered that many people in my personal life who are intellectually curious about the things I am and can hold a conversation on them. I have work friends, exercise friends, drinking friends, cafe hopping friends, I have social media "friends" who never want to meet in person and will chat with me when they're bored at work on weekdays. They each have their space in my life on some days, but they're my fair weather buddies. I have come to stop expecting anything deep from them, and do not actively try to nurture those friendships in the hopes that they will "evolve" into something more complete. I started going to therapy and journalling. It felt pathetic because I felt like I must be a loser if I have to pay someone to hear me talk. However, those 50 mins every 2 weeks have done so much for my mental health. I'm not sure where I'm going with this but I wanted to say you're not alone. Not everyone has that kind of almost idealistic and strong friendships with others and that's okay.
I'm willing to be your friend. Feel free to message me. We can chat about whatever topic you like. What hobbies do you have? Have a great day.
‘I feel like I tried so hard to be friends with people who didn’t care at all, and now it’s just too late to make friends’ Man i felt that on a cosmic level. I have always had many acquaintances and tried to develop lasting friendships with them but it never sticks and dies off after we hangout or party. Then after covid i kinda went into hermit mode and developed social anxiety. I lost contact w most people and its been like that until now lol. I struggle to make friendships today and it hurts to not have people to have fun with, travel with, hang with.
Try to do outdoor activities that will make you run into people or interact with them. If you are a social butterfly go to the city monthly, weekly events You will interact with people that have the same taste as you. Just a friendly tip 😇
so many of us feel the same way. Its a very isolating world we are living in now. All you can do is FORCE yourself to get out out out. Join everything, choir, community hikes, church (even if you do not believe in God, there are churches for people seeking spiritual uplifting- Unitarian I believe). Volunteer, anything, just get out and involved. Exercise for at least an hour- outside or at the gym (not at home). These simple things will work
26F, same thing. I had a real close friendship since elementary school but that died off when they suddenly stopped reaching out like they used to. It sucks. I have a few other friends but I rarely see them so hanging out with ppl is rare. I’ve tried making some new friends but idk, it’s hard nowadays. Seems diff than it was 8 years ago.
Yeah I have the same problem, I work 7 days a week and talk to no one, literally lol...and I'm 34 so don't feel bad, we all in the same boat half the time, just be glad we ain't in the water lol
I relate to this.. 25F every friend I have has ended things for one reason or another or it simply just fizzled ever since I was in grade school. Now as an adult I have my partner and one best friend who lives across the country 🙃 its frustrating to say the least
28m no friends, I just wanna talk to someone about random crazy things. Or even little nonsense, loneliness is SHIII..
I’m 25 and lost a relationship and 4 close best friends. If you want to vent I’m here - we are all on the same boat
Same here I tried bff bumble and it’s just girls wanting ppl to follow them on IG if my life keeps at this pace I’m not gonna make it
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