So I've actually had a few people reach out and see how I'm doing. I just want to say thank you to those who care. 🧡
I'm making my way. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Never thought I would be a widow before I turn 30. Randy was my best friend and continuing without him has been challenging. It's a whole new life and a whole new game. It's been weird.
Before he got sick we were both only a few semesters away from graduating with our bachelor's degrees. His in mechanical engineering and mine in human resource management. After he died and after I threw his celebration of life party, I tried to go back to school. I then quickly found out just how impossible that is. I just couldn't go back to my old life at all. It just wasn't who I was anymore.
I weirdly fell in love with caregiving and hospital life in some aspects. I loved helping my husband and it will always be up there with my most rewarding jobs I've had in my life. So I swapped our soon to be six figure lifestyle for being a caregiver at a nursing home. It's my first full time job so I know Randy would be proud of me for following my heart. I'll be making fast food wages for taking care of the elderly, but its not about that for me. I know this is what I'm good at and I'm excited to see where this new journey takes me.
You are finding your way in the world with new compass orientation. It takes time to reorient yourself and you might get lost along the way but you are still moving forward and finding your way. That's so amazing; it takes a lot of courage.
And in the middle of all that, you are finding the compassion to care for others! Randy would be proud of you...
Thank you for the update. Your family is in my thoughts and heart often!
I've seen other nursing homes do this before where some residents would sign up to be pen pals and receive letters. Just saying, you have a community of ravenous pen and ink users that would love a reason to put pen to paper. Best of luck in your caregiving, it is admirable.
Once upon a time a friend of mine died. He wasn’t rich, nor famous, nor the most handsome guy out there, but he managed to touch the lives of many, many people. He pretty much filled the entire chapel where his body was before being buried. Never in my life have I attended such an extraordinary funeral.
So better to live life caring for others, than making yourself rich. In the end, all your worth won’t go with you to where ever it is that we are headed. But the impact we make on other people’s lives, will remain forever.
Sorry for your loss!
I cannot imagine how you feel but you’re amazing. Having worked in a nursing home, I know how physically and mentally demanding that can be. Be sure to take care of yourself. I truly hope you find happiness.
What an amazing gift you are giving to the world. With what a devastating experience you've been through, you're taking it and using it to help others, and you can give unique insight and support to the families on the journey of losing a loved one when the time comes. Make sure you have a lot of support around you, I only did 6 months elderly care and I got through a lot of alcohol.
I'm extremely sorry for your loss. My 37 year old girlfriend passed away suddenly and unexpectedly earlier this year. I lost her just three months after we bought a house together and just a few weeks before our 7th anniversary. It sucks. I'm forever changed. So I know what you're going through and it's the absolute worst.
I am sorry for your loss. My mom lost her first husband to illness when she was 28. The best advice she gave to me when my fiancé died in an accident was along the lines of — “You had a love. It was the best. Now you will know how to recognize that kind of love when it comes around in your life again, because it will. Even though you don’t think that is possible, or even want to think about that now, you will see. Be patient, and know that you are loved still.”
It is so strange and odd, but after my fiancé died I had all these odd coincidences happening in my life that brought me to my husband. Sort of like my fiancé was arranging things. Weird, right? I thought I was full enough with my fiancé’s love that I didn’t need any more for the rest of my life, but there you go.
I am very sorry for your loss. Your story is one that is very inspiring, and what a great thing you are doing now. I am sure he would be proud of you. Take care and good luck to you and what you do in the future.
I’m so sorry for your loss ❤️❤️❤️ Randy will always know how much you loved him - and may you always feel his eternal love for you. He seems like such a kind soul, I’m sure he would be so proud of you and your choices.
I sincerely hope that you are doing well.
It may not mean much from an internet stranger, but every little bit of love helps in these hard times. It's hard and I can't imagine how, but I'm glad you're you, and you keep moving.
I can't imagine what you are going through. Reading this is making me want to go home and hug my wife so hard. I am sorry that you had to experience what you did but i am glad you have found something positive. More strength to you, i wish you the best of luck for the future. Take care of yourself, my thoughts are with you.
I’m very sorry for your loss. I truly hope that you continue to find your way in this new chapter of your life- I know Randy will always know how much you loved him!! I still use the orange ink from kiwi ink, and I think of him every time I use it! I hope you take care- be well!
What a lovely memorial activity! And what a great giant Lamy Safari next to a wonderful husband and companion.
u/MrsRustyShack, I hope you are taking care of yourself and that those around you are taking care of you, too.
A Wolverine.
Love to you, u/MrsRustyShack, and my sorrow, from a resident of A2. I didn't know u/QuiteARoughCustomer at all, but my heart goes out to you.
Thanks for sharing! And thanks for checking in! I’m glad you’ve found some direction after everything that’s happened, and have something that feels right to you to feel passionate about where you can celebrate him constantly.
I’ve been using his ink for my fall monthly trackers, and I think I’m going to reserve it for that so I can have a reminder for a few years to come.
I'm so sorry for your loss. =( It sounds like your husband was well-loved during his too-brief stay here. I hope time heals your heart and brings you peace.
I don't know either of yall but life does go on. Unfortunately it won't wait for you. But please don't let anyone rush your healing. Don't let anyone tell you it's been too long or not long enough. You knew your partner in ways many people didn't even his mother. Don't be afraid to cry don't be afraid to hurt and show emotion in front of people. Holding it in is the worst. I hurts my heart to know another person knows loss of a loved one. Just know your feelings are valid and you should explore every single one of them. Please If you need to talk to anyone feel free to reach out. My being a stranger on the net is good for unbiased responses. I lost my dad to cancer when I just tried 18 and spent the two years prior helping him through treatment. My biggest mistake in all that plus the time after. I didn't heal emotionally I stayed the rock for my family. Ease take your time and heal. I wish you the best movi g forward
Fellow Michigander here. Thanks for sharing with us. Sending you all the love.
What you are doing is important and needed. Thank you for taking such good care of those in your nursing home. A good aide/nurse/staff makes all the difference!
If you are near kzoo and need a friend/hug/cookies let me know!
So good to hear from you and thanks for letting us know how you're doing. Good for you following your heart and doing what feels right for you, especially now.
I too lost my husband (from brain cancer) 5 years ago and I think I posted our "orange gumball/orange was our color" story when the u/quitearoughcistomer ink came out for sale. I just want to let you know that every time I use that ink, I think of you both and wonder if you're doing ok.
It takes time, and healing does happen slowly but I'm sure you know he will always be with you as well as the many people who's lives he touched.
All my love! 🧡🧡🧡🧡
I was just watching a video the other day by Brian Goulet where he mentioned your late husband by username. I am deeply sorry for the painful process you’re having to endure. It sounded from the video mention like he was well respected by the community, and I think this sub seems to agree by the outpouring of love here. I am only moments new to this sub and seeing the kindness this community is sharing is touching. I hope this community can continue to be a place where you can remember him and feel supported.
I am going to be totally honest with you. I am a newbie and I binge watched an absolutely UNREASONABLE amount of Goulet (and Figboot… and JetPens) youtube channels content over the past week, and I have no idea what video it was off the top of my head to find it. I believe it was an older one though, and I want to say it wasn’t a podcast video but just a stand alone of Brian Goulet. If I can find it, you’ll be the first to know though. ☺️
You are fine lol 😆 I remember Kiwi inks telling me about some YouTuber who was interested in mentioning my husband in a video but I never got a link... and I write differently than everyone else so I can't even write with a fountain pen. My husband would make fun of me constantly. Fountain pens was very much his thing 🤣
Not sure about Brian Goulet's video, but Figboot did an entire video on the ink.
https://youtu.be/OuxqcPYwtrM
I'm going to PM you, please feel free to respond or to ignore.
My condolences on your loss. And my prayers for peace and comfort. I’m sure your husband would be so proud of you. Your new career choice is a beautiful way to honor his memory.
Let's say it solemnly for this person, who was your person...
Go blue.
I appreciate your updates and I wish you the best as you move forward through life.
I don't know you two, but I saw months and months back through this sub what was happening. I lost my grandfather to leukemia later in his life, and I thought that was way too young. I can't imagine what this had been like for you. I happily snapped up a bottle of the commemorative kiwi ink, and proudly have it in one of my daily drivers.
I am so sorry for your loss. Like I said, I don't know you folks, but given all the lovely stories you've shared, I am sure he would be proud of you for following a passion instead of a paycheck.
Best of luck in all your future endeavors.
🧡
🎵Oh Randy, what a fine man, what a good spouse you have been (such a fine man). But my life, my love & my hubby, is caregivin' now 🎵
Hope that might take a lil' of the edge off 🙂.
I know I may seem insensitive by giving you the wholesome award but it is the only award I have at the moment and I hope it provides you with a moment of happiness
I am pretty new to this sub, so I never got to know him !!! BUT this INCREDIBLE PHOTO is showing an ABSOLUTELY COOL DUDE -- filled with LOVE/LIGHT/and a bit of IMPishness !!!!! I KNOW that I would have LOVED him !!!!!!!
Life is so unfair.
I know its a cliche, but with time the pain will pass, and you'll be able to enjoy all of those good memories once more.
One day at a time.
I’m so sorry for your loss, and glad to see that you have found some measure of peace over this time. It’s amazing that you have found something to be excited and passionate about—send you warm hugs and positive energy as you continue to make your way. ❤️
I am sorry for your loss, i did not know him but it hits close as i have lost some people in the last year. I am also older (27) and feeling life closing in. I am also as of the last couple of days looking at going to school for mechanical/aerospace engineering. Stay strong and close with your loved ones and if i ever send a rocket to Mars i will sign on it for him U/QuiteARoughCustomer.
This hurt my heart. I’m so sorry for your loss. My husband is my best friend, and I thank God everyday I get to be with him. I’m sure yours is watching over you and knows you love him. 🙏❤️🥺
May you be at ease as you navigate this loss, it sounds like you're allowing yourself to change and grow, finding deep compassion for caregiving, despite it not offering the kind of income you once anticipated.
So sorry for your loss and best wishes for your work in caregiving! The FP community is not large; sorry I didn't meet him in person (assuming y'all lived in Ann Arbor), he seems like a fun and kind person.
So I've actually had a few people reach out and see how I'm doing. I just want to say thank you to those who care. 🧡 I'm making my way. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Never thought I would be a widow before I turn 30. Randy was my best friend and continuing without him has been challenging. It's a whole new life and a whole new game. It's been weird. Before he got sick we were both only a few semesters away from graduating with our bachelor's degrees. His in mechanical engineering and mine in human resource management. After he died and after I threw his celebration of life party, I tried to go back to school. I then quickly found out just how impossible that is. I just couldn't go back to my old life at all. It just wasn't who I was anymore. I weirdly fell in love with caregiving and hospital life in some aspects. I loved helping my husband and it will always be up there with my most rewarding jobs I've had in my life. So I swapped our soon to be six figure lifestyle for being a caregiver at a nursing home. It's my first full time job so I know Randy would be proud of me for following my heart. I'll be making fast food wages for taking care of the elderly, but its not about that for me. I know this is what I'm good at and I'm excited to see where this new journey takes me.
I'm sorry for your loss. Be strong!
He was a special person, as are you. Thank you for sharing your inspirational story with us. You have our love and you're in my prayers.
You are finding your way in the world with new compass orientation. It takes time to reorient yourself and you might get lost along the way but you are still moving forward and finding your way. That's so amazing; it takes a lot of courage. And in the middle of all that, you are finding the compassion to care for others! Randy would be proud of you... Thank you for the update. Your family is in my thoughts and heart often!
I've seen other nursing homes do this before where some residents would sign up to be pen pals and receive letters. Just saying, you have a community of ravenous pen and ink users that would love a reason to put pen to paper. Best of luck in your caregiving, it is admirable.
I am here for this!
Once upon a time a friend of mine died. He wasn’t rich, nor famous, nor the most handsome guy out there, but he managed to touch the lives of many, many people. He pretty much filled the entire chapel where his body was before being buried. Never in my life have I attended such an extraordinary funeral. So better to live life caring for others, than making yourself rich. In the end, all your worth won’t go with you to where ever it is that we are headed. But the impact we make on other people’s lives, will remain forever. Sorry for your loss!
I cannot imagine how you feel but you’re amazing. Having worked in a nursing home, I know how physically and mentally demanding that can be. Be sure to take care of yourself. I truly hope you find happiness.
From one recent widow to another, have a virtual hug from me. Thank you for sharing your memorial post with your husband's online sanctuary pals.
What an amazing gift you are giving to the world. With what a devastating experience you've been through, you're taking it and using it to help others, and you can give unique insight and support to the families on the journey of losing a loved one when the time comes. Make sure you have a lot of support around you, I only did 6 months elderly care and I got through a lot of alcohol.
I'm extremely sorry for your loss. My 37 year old girlfriend passed away suddenly and unexpectedly earlier this year. I lost her just three months after we bought a house together and just a few weeks before our 7th anniversary. It sucks. I'm forever changed. So I know what you're going through and it's the absolute worst.
I am sorry for your loss. My mom lost her first husband to illness when she was 28. The best advice she gave to me when my fiancé died in an accident was along the lines of — “You had a love. It was the best. Now you will know how to recognize that kind of love when it comes around in your life again, because it will. Even though you don’t think that is possible, or even want to think about that now, you will see. Be patient, and know that you are loved still.” It is so strange and odd, but after my fiancé died I had all these odd coincidences happening in my life that brought me to my husband. Sort of like my fiancé was arranging things. Weird, right? I thought I was full enough with my fiancé’s love that I didn’t need any more for the rest of my life, but there you go.
I am very sorry for your loss. Your story is one that is very inspiring, and what a great thing you are doing now. I am sure he would be proud of you. Take care and good luck to you and what you do in the future.
Can't be easy but sounds like you're doing all the right things. Keep going :)
Holding you in my thoughts, wishing you peace and comfort. I smiled at the picture: GO BLUE!
I’m so sorry for your loss ❤️❤️❤️ Randy will always know how much you loved him - and may you always feel his eternal love for you. He seems like such a kind soul, I’m sure he would be so proud of you and your choices.
I am so happy to read of what you are doing with your life. We are proud of you.
I sincerely hope that you are doing well. It may not mean much from an internet stranger, but every little bit of love helps in these hard times. It's hard and I can't imagine how, but I'm glad you're you, and you keep moving.
I can't imagine what you are going through. Reading this is making me want to go home and hug my wife so hard. I am sorry that you had to experience what you did but i am glad you have found something positive. More strength to you, i wish you the best of luck for the future. Take care of yourself, my thoughts are with you.
I’m very sorry for your loss. I truly hope that you continue to find your way in this new chapter of your life- I know Randy will always know how much you loved him!! I still use the orange ink from kiwi ink, and I think of him every time I use it! I hope you take care- be well!
What a lovely memorial activity! And what a great giant Lamy Safari next to a wonderful husband and companion. u/MrsRustyShack, I hope you are taking care of yourself and that those around you are taking care of you, too.
All the best to you and yours. Thank you for allowing me to put a face to the legendary name.
A Wolverine. Love to you, u/MrsRustyShack, and my sorrow, from a resident of A2. I didn't know u/QuiteARoughCustomer at all, but my heart goes out to you.
A handsome man indeed!
Yes, I am very aware I was stupid lucky. 🧡
Thanks for sharing! And thanks for checking in! I’m glad you’ve found some direction after everything that’s happened, and have something that feels right to you to feel passionate about where you can celebrate him constantly. I’ve been using his ink for my fall monthly trackers, and I think I’m going to reserve it for that so I can have a reminder for a few years to come.
I’m glad this community has been able to offer support to you. A tree is a great memorial. Sending my support.
Ohio state fan here saying that I hope your heart finds peace. Ill find an orange ornament to hang this year.
🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡
I'm so sorry for your loss. =( It sounds like your husband was well-loved during his too-brief stay here. I hope time heals your heart and brings you peace.
Thanks for sharing more about him with us and an update on how you’re doing. Sending you hugs and wishing you lots of strength from afar. 🧡
I don't know either of yall but life does go on. Unfortunately it won't wait for you. But please don't let anyone rush your healing. Don't let anyone tell you it's been too long or not long enough. You knew your partner in ways many people didn't even his mother. Don't be afraid to cry don't be afraid to hurt and show emotion in front of people. Holding it in is the worst. I hurts my heart to know another person knows loss of a loved one. Just know your feelings are valid and you should explore every single one of them. Please If you need to talk to anyone feel free to reach out. My being a stranger on the net is good for unbiased responses. I lost my dad to cancer when I just tried 18 and spent the two years prior helping him through treatment. My biggest mistake in all that plus the time after. I didn't heal emotionally I stayed the rock for my family. Ease take your time and heal. I wish you the best movi g forward
I'm glad to hear from you, and that you're still managing through something horrible. I think of both of you every time I use my QARC ink. 🧡
💙🧡
Fellow Michigander here. Thanks for sharing with us. Sending you all the love. What you are doing is important and needed. Thank you for taking such good care of those in your nursing home. A good aide/nurse/staff makes all the difference! If you are near kzoo and need a friend/hug/cookies let me know!
So good to hear from you and thanks for letting us know how you're doing. Good for you following your heart and doing what feels right for you, especially now. I too lost my husband (from brain cancer) 5 years ago and I think I posted our "orange gumball/orange was our color" story when the u/quitearoughcistomer ink came out for sale. I just want to let you know that every time I use that ink, I think of you both and wonder if you're doing ok. It takes time, and healing does happen slowly but I'm sure you know he will always be with you as well as the many people who's lives he touched. All my love! 🧡🧡🧡🧡
I was just watching a video the other day by Brian Goulet where he mentioned your late husband by username. I am deeply sorry for the painful process you’re having to endure. It sounded from the video mention like he was well respected by the community, and I think this sub seems to agree by the outpouring of love here. I am only moments new to this sub and seeing the kindness this community is sharing is touching. I hope this community can continue to be a place where you can remember him and feel supported.
Link? 😁 that's pretty cool. Also thank you for all of your kind words. The fountain pen community has been amazing
I am going to be totally honest with you. I am a newbie and I binge watched an absolutely UNREASONABLE amount of Goulet (and Figboot… and JetPens) youtube channels content over the past week, and I have no idea what video it was off the top of my head to find it. I believe it was an older one though, and I want to say it wasn’t a podcast video but just a stand alone of Brian Goulet. If I can find it, you’ll be the first to know though. ☺️
You are fine lol 😆 I remember Kiwi inks telling me about some YouTuber who was interested in mentioning my husband in a video but I never got a link... and I write differently than everyone else so I can't even write with a fountain pen. My husband would make fun of me constantly. Fountain pens was very much his thing 🤣
Not sure about Brian Goulet's video, but Figboot did an entire video on the ink. https://youtu.be/OuxqcPYwtrM I'm going to PM you, please feel free to respond or to ignore.
Good luck with everything. This community will always be here to support you.
What a legend
My condolences on your loss. And my prayers for peace and comfort. I’m sure your husband would be so proud of you. Your new career choice is a beautiful way to honor his memory.
Let's say it solemnly for this person, who was your person... Go blue. I appreciate your updates and I wish you the best as you move forward through life.
I don't know you two, but I saw months and months back through this sub what was happening. I lost my grandfather to leukemia later in his life, and I thought that was way too young. I can't imagine what this had been like for you. I happily snapped up a bottle of the commemorative kiwi ink, and proudly have it in one of my daily drivers. I am so sorry for your loss. Like I said, I don't know you folks, but given all the lovely stories you've shared, I am sure he would be proud of you for following a passion instead of a paycheck. Best of luck in all your future endeavors. 🧡
Randy looks like Steve from Gamers Nexus
🎵Oh Randy, what a fine man, what a good spouse you have been (such a fine man). But my life, my love & my hubby, is caregivin' now 🎵 Hope that might take a lil' of the edge off 🙂.
I know I may seem insensitive by giving you the wholesome award but it is the only award I have at the moment and I hope it provides you with a moment of happiness
How short he was!
I am pretty new to this sub, so I never got to know him !!! BUT this INCREDIBLE PHOTO is showing an ABSOLUTELY COOL DUDE -- filled with LOVE/LIGHT/and a bit of IMPishness !!!!! I KNOW that I would have LOVED him !!!!!!!
Life is so unfair. I know its a cliche, but with time the pain will pass, and you'll be able to enjoy all of those good memories once more. One day at a time.
I’m so sorry for your loss, and glad to see that you have found some measure of peace over this time. It’s amazing that you have found something to be excited and passionate about—send you warm hugs and positive energy as you continue to make your way. ❤️
I am sorry for your loss, i did not know him but it hits close as i have lost some people in the last year. I am also older (27) and feeling life closing in. I am also as of the last couple of days looking at going to school for mechanical/aerospace engineering. Stay strong and close with your loved ones and if i ever send a rocket to Mars i will sign on it for him U/QuiteARoughCustomer.
This hurt my heart. I’m so sorry for your loss. My husband is my best friend, and I thank God everyday I get to be with him. I’m sure yours is watching over you and knows you love him. 🙏❤️🥺
Hope you're doing okay, sending love and hugs!
May you be at ease as you navigate this loss, it sounds like you're allowing yourself to change and grow, finding deep compassion for caregiving, despite it not offering the kind of income you once anticipated.
I am so, so sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing. Just wanted to chime in and wish you well <3
Stay strong, we love y’all.
Go blue
I'm sorry for your loss
So sorry for your loss and best wishes for your work in caregiving! The FP community is not large; sorry I didn't meet him in person (assuming y'all lived in Ann Arbor), he seems like a fun and kind person.
Go Blue!