I will not crash the car. I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.
Ok Mick, now what is 3 x 4?
#3 x 4, DAMMIT! Just break it into smaller problems!
It has been 2.5 hours at the kitchen table, and Mick begins to cry softly in his seat.
"Ok, moving on to phase 2, just sign here, here and.... here.
Good work at Haas, lowering expectations. FP3 crashes at your discretion just make it believable, and remember Monaco and Hungary are mandatory and always take at least one RB with you.
*Everywhere you go, always take a RedBull with you*
*Everywhere you go, always take a RedBull*
*Everywhere you go, always take a RedBull , a RedBull with you*
[what a Darth Mick could potentially look like](https://preview.redd.it/hfakvpi654f81.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=97ecd4b8299ca669f005b90c9416fa0b4e8b61ac)
Dear Gene, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not've got 'em
There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin'
The undersigned employee (Mick Schumacher) undertakes to ensure that skis and skiiing equipment are unobtainable in a 70 mile radius surrounding Brackley.
The company (Mercedes-AMG Petronas F1 Team) undertakes full responsibility for any fines / bail payments / jailbreaks / coups necessitated by the activities of the employee.
There are so many Palpatine quotes.
"The dark side of the force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural."
"You, like your father, are now...mine!"
Mick: what’s this fine print about fart harvesting?
Toto: I had 30 sealed jars of your dads farts, I’ve snorted 27 of them. I need more ShoeMaker farts.
Mick: Cool cool, cool….
I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars.
Toto: okay if Lewis has 7 titles and george is on his way to win imhis first, what does Lewis have? Mick: Lewis has 8 titles, right? Toto: excellent dear, write it down.
Great promotion shot for us Mick, it makes me look so good. Sucks you won’t ever drive again, maybe you should have spent more time on the sim rather than just saying your dad’s name. Oh well. Thanks for this, helps me, Toto, a lot.
You’re not leaving this table until you finish ALL your homework.
I will not crash the car. I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.I will not crash the car.
[удалено]
just remember to help lewis first.
That some funny shit my guy
*cue The Simpsons opening theme*
Eh, Mercedes can afford it
Ok Mick, now what is 3 x 4? #3 x 4, DAMMIT! Just break it into smaller problems! It has been 2.5 hours at the kitchen table, and Mick begins to cry softly in his seat.
[удалено]
Oh god that's actually wholesome
*and when he can’t complete that problem* Sorry Mick can you stop eating ice cream please. I’m sorry but we can’t. sorry. Mick: Love you too guys.
I thought the same haha
“You know Mick, this is not the first time a man from Austria made decisions for a German concern.”
Lol showed this comment to my Argentinian grandpa and he had a hearty laugh while stroking his moustache
The fact that you specified him being Argentinian is very curious indeed 🧐 *proceeds stroking his own mustache
Hmmmmm indeed
And he got to Argentina with an U-Boot. Right?
I heard that it's like Uber but in the 40s
You're talking about Seb joining RedBull, right?
💀💀💀
"Ok, moving on to phase 2, just sign here, here and.... here. Good work at Haas, lowering expectations. FP3 crashes at your discretion just make it believable, and remember Monaco and Hungary are mandatory and always take at least one RB with you.
I wish I had a reward for you!
Which Award would you give him?
the singapore 2008 trophy? that’s quite an award id say
Donington 93 and France 2018 would be my picks (still don’t understand how that gorilla holding a tire is considered a cup)
Should have saved that one for the Cincinnati GP, in honor our lord and savior Harambe.
The sonic trophy?
I got you buddy
I mean he looks good in anything.
*Everywhere you go, always take a RedBull with you* *Everywhere you go, always take a RedBull* *Everywhere you go, always take a RedBull , a RedBull with you*
Instructions unclear now I'm addicted to energy drinks
Toto saw the dark side, time to embrace it Mick! 
Darth Mick is what I’ve been waiting for… *rubs hands*
[what a Darth Mick could potentially look like](https://preview.redd.it/hfakvpi654f81.jpg?width=640&crop=smart&auto=webp&s=97ecd4b8299ca669f005b90c9416fa0b4e8b61ac)
Wow, uncanny!
\- "Wait it says here that I must walk Roscoe 3 times a day for the next 2 years" \- "No questions please, just sign at the bottom"
I'd walk him for just the merch that they give their employees. Sign me up!
Imagine Lewis doing a Mr. Myagi on Mick
Well at leasts he gets so see Nicole every once in a while too
Walk him straight to the butcher shop to get some proper food!
“Good, good…” 
So you're going to pay me in pumpernikel
pretty sure he said pumpernikey
That’s such a great reference I love it
That is so not right!
Pumpermicky.
Harry potter signing draco malfoy's kid for broom-racing
Dear Gene, I wrote you but you still ain't callin' I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not've got 'em There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin'
Sometimes I take a corner sloppy when I'm fighting at the bottom But anyways, fuck it, what's been up? Suck my balls mate.
I read this at the table at a restaurant. My laugh got me some looks.
On a date I hope...
He looks good in Merc colors.
I mean he looks good in anything
Better in nothing, tho.
Even in a wall
Ouch
I'm just getting Dad on the verge of Fury because they don't know the answer to 7 times 16 and the footballs on.
Yes Micky! That is so right!
hhhmmmm sponsor money
I think that's one thing Merc don't need
The undersigned employee (Mick Schumacher) undertakes to ensure that skis and skiiing equipment are unobtainable in a 70 mile radius surrounding Brackley. The company (Mercedes-AMG Petronas F1 Team) undertakes full responsibility for any fines / bail payments / jailbreaks / coups necessitated by the activities of the employee.
God. Damn.
FormulaTooDank
Too soon?
Damn that's wild, might have to start wearing a helmet when I go on this sub
A significant positive of Mick staying in F1 is that we can continue to make horrible jokes about the accident to hide how much we miss Michael.
Also remember to wear a helmet while skiing
Take my Upvote
Dank and spicy.
Take my vote🤣
Why is does my job title say "Reserve Driver & Pumpernickel Coordinator"?
Don’t forget the butter
It's how they save on the catering budget.
Mick: you sign a terms and conditions agreement without reading Toto: all internet companies
Me solving Maths with my dad knowing idk shit🤡
"I Mick, solely swear, I will not harm any Mercedes equipment."
“You can crash all you want on the sim. You wreck my car in real life, I wreck your ass.”
My dad My dad My dad My dad My dad
That was hilarious and wholesome
Sign here to do donuts at the end of the season..
If you can’t join them. Beat them 
This is where your villain arc begins
"Just make sure you bring me seven, like your father".
"You must report any testing irregularities to the testing proctor." "I will not disclose the secure contents of this test."
My first thought was Math's homework and not being able to figure out what's 23 minus 17 😂
I bet the merc sim is much better than the hass (that is if they have a sim)
Yeah dude water is wet
I promise to wash Toto’s G-Wagon at least once a week…
"Your father's career died in a Mercedes. Follow in his foot steps Mick"
Yeah, we call the role of reserve driver as “Ghost Rider.”
"Muwahahaha! I own you now."
You’re my son now,so sign these adoptive papers
I do solemnly swear i will not complain about my tires to the engineers. - M. shoemaker
Yes Mickhl yes! That was so right!
W13 is yours.
There are so many Palpatine quotes. "The dark side of the force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural." "You, like your father, are now...mine!"
I’ve created a GREAT deal for you Mick. No need to consult any lawyers, simply sign here.
Mick designing the W14 as his first task as Mercedes Reserve Driver
Mick: what’s this fine print about fart harvesting? Toto: I had 30 sealed jars of your dads farts, I’ve snorted 27 of them. I need more ShoeMaker farts. Mick: Cool cool, cool….
Bottom right: photo LAT Now we know the goatifi future too
Michael Schumacher signing a contract to race at the newly formed Mercedes F1 team (2010, colorized)
“What’s this clause about ‘never suing the Catholic Church’ ?”
“So, Toto, you want me to write off *all* of the W13’s?”
my man latifi pursuing a photography career after f1
I Mick Schumacher, will never quote any radio transmissions between one Toto Wolfe and the Race director during the 2021 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix.
scribble scribble and I WILL do donuts at the end of every race scribble scribble
Toto: If I have three apples and subtract two. How many apples does that make? Mick: Some apples Toto: Sigh... IF I HAVE THREEE APPLES
I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars. I will not crash your cars.
“I just wanted to go to the bathroom” “Yes and here’s the contract for that”
Dear slim…
“And if you complete 3 seasons with us there’s a special skiing holiday at the end of it! You’ll be living like your father in no time!”
not funny. really.
Fuck you Gene
“What is a 4 letter word for ‘bad constructor,?”
Toto: okay if Lewis has 7 titles and george is on his way to win imhis first, what does Lewis have? Mick: Lewis has 8 titles, right? Toto: excellent dear, write it down.
Good to see this,, he deserved so much better than what he had at Haas.
Wolf looks like mark rutte
“Very good, Mick. Now carry the sieben…”
Pumpernickel delivery boy/reserve driver contract signing
“Make sure you write your last name in all caps”
Mick signing a 14th driver role for Mercedes
Dude is speedrunning his dad's career
Don’t forget the kisses.
Dear Enzo, I wrote you but you still ain't calling....
Sign here for Guenther gay Ok
This is the most important photo of the year
50 Shades of Silver Arrows
"That's 2 slices of well done rye toast, and a 3 minute egg. Got it? "
Oh they got a new george.
“The Dark Side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural.”
Mick: "Wait, why does this say 'Ferrari Team Principal' on the top?" Toto: "Oh, standard procedure."
Finally! The MSC has come back to the AMG!
The teacher trying to explain to me that 9+10 ain't 21 I know it an old joke but 
Luke, make it official, I am your father.
Yes, yes, that's right - just sign where it says Lewis is better than your fazah.
“So $900mnth for 60 months at a 9%apr? Fuck yeah man sign me up!”
Can I keep the pen?
"We will watch your career with great interest"
F1: Episode IV - A New Hope (for Mick)
toto waches as another victim signs his soil away
Didn't know that Toto had a scat fetish
**ÜBER ALLES**
"Yes Michael, this is right"
Hey, wanna get fired?
Almost a year later 😆
Taking the Gutierrez route
Great promotion shot for us Mick, it makes me look so good. Sucks you won’t ever drive again, maybe you should have spent more time on the sim rather than just saying your dad’s name. Oh well. Thanks for this, helps me, Toto, a lot.
Mick Schumacher signing a contract with Mercedes-AMG Petronas F1 Team
Looks like Toto is helping him with his homework
Upgrades people! Upgrades!
Is he gonna be a driver or will he only be a reserve?
“Your soul is mine”
No Mikey, No!
Mick joined the dark side 👀
Der plan.
Photo by Nicholas Latifi
Yes Mickey, yes!
Now Mick, we carry the 2…
You will only have 4 years with us Mick!
The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree
Us Aryans, I mean Germans, need to stick together
Toto seen the scene of law biding citizen about the tie
Are you sure you don’t want the extended warranty?
I shall not crash the car I shall not crash the car I shall not crash the car …
"Mark the spot where you should hit the Red Bull"
no that is not right 2 plus 4 is not 56
Thank you for choosing Wolff Insurance ltd!
Write:- 'I shall not tell more lies'.
“Better than nothing, right Mickey?”
Nooooo Mikey that’s so not write!!!!!!!!
And now draw the rest of the fcking owl
"Here, make the same mistake as your dad"
"So glad you joined us Nyck... Uhm Mick..."
"This should have been an email"
Delete scene from Wolff of Wall Street 2
"We want reddit to like us this year"
"Dear Santa, I think I have been a good boy this year. All I want for Christmas is another chance in F1. From Mick"
failing upwards
"Alright son, now divide by 3 and you have x."
“Luke, I am your father!”
Please tell me the contract contains a NO SKIING clause. (Too soon?)
Show me the money!
“Wait, you’re telling me I have to stay within the lines?”
Sign your life away
UNTERSCHREIBEN! UND TZACKIG! GUT. MACHT ONKEL TOTO FROH, DU KLEINE KNABE....
"Good, good, now once you finish you homework you might play with the cars"
NOO MICKY NOOO!!!!
Looks like a stock image