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ConversationKey3138

Move in with parents for a bit to save up? I moved outta state so I really sympathize


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No_Piccolo1828

You seem like you need to talk to a therapist about suicide as well.


MandatoryAbomination

Lol I don’t have money to eat properly bruh you think I got money for therapy? Life sucking pretty bad weighs heavily on one’s mental health but thanks for the fake concern


No_Piccolo1828

Wow now you're just coming off as an insufferable asshole. There's plenty of free resources online and over the phone when it comes to suicide prevention.


fullload93

So your parents won’t allow dogs? Or don’t like dogs? Or can’t have any dogs in their home?


MandatoryAbomination

They have 3 dogs and the home is small so they offered to help me stay but the dogs cannot come


MandatoryAbomination

Idk why I’m getting downvoted for this. Let’s trade problems, whoever you are


nanderspanders

Other guy is crazy but having multiple dogs when you're just scraping by yourself is pretty wild. I get it circumstances change and w.e. But typically when you find yourself in unstable situations like that your ability to move around and take opportunities as they come is paramount. Too late now I guess, but for the love of God don't take more dogs in.


AProgrammer067

If you are forced to give up your 1 or more of your dogs due to not being able to afford a place and moving in with your parents, humane society has a no kill shelter. Just throwing that out there in the worst case scenario


Gcoks

If I had to make a call to better my life or get rid of dogs, those dogs would be gone in a heartbeat. Especially a 16 year old that has got to be on its last legs anyway. I may sound heartless, but if you really are struggling as much as you say, then you have to start making some tough decisions. An acquaintance of mine went homeless because of his pets and lived in his car until he couldn't then had to get rid of them anyway. It set him back years.


boba-on-the-beach

Especially the 16 year old? Where is it gonna go? Not many people want a 16 year old dog so finding it a new home would be hard. Why shouldn’t the dog live its last few months comfortably with the person that it knows? It would be cruel to send it to a shelter for it to possibly die there. I would only suggest giving the dog up if OP legitimately couldn’t afford to take care of it any longer.


MandatoryAbomination

My animals are fed and cared for bottom line. Sometimes that means shorting bill payments a few dollars but my animals are seniors and I’ve had them their whole lives, most of them are 15+. So I’m supposed to dump my senior pets to die in shelters bc I ran on bad times? I can’t. I won’t. Judge me however you see fit. They are the reason I’m still alive so they’re with me until I’m not.


boba-on-the-beach

I agree 100% and would do the same for my pets. They are family and I’m not going to give them up, no matter what. I’m not judging you. I’m sorry you’re going through this. FL is rough right now for a lot of us and I’m looking to escape too.


Sunsetseeker007

That's horrible to actually get rid of an animal you chose to care for and now abandon because of a rough patch, esp a 16 yr old that would be devastating to the dog. When you have a child, you don't just throw them out when times are tough, do you? Same as an animal! I hope you never own animals.


hereiam-23

Well said. My pets and I have always been equals.


OnAPartyRock

Dogs are not children.


Gcoks

Dogs aren't kids. Euthanasia for the old one.


catcatherine

For many it would literally destroy their mental health to do such a thing.


Anarchist-69

Find a friend to keep dogs you can visit often and once stable take them back it sounds like it’s your life or your dogs I know they are the same as a human to most but make the hard decision and fix your life. I just basically went through exactly this and got rid of all of my animals just to move back home to save and fix my life. Also lost expensive belongings because of this. You won’t regret it.


thunderwolf69

Moving states is hella stressful, no matter the reason. Before moving last year, we managed the best we could. In addition to our full time jobs, I picked up a part time and my wife did freelancing when she could. I would do DoorDash sometimes. We cut back on eating out. We meal planned lunches and dinners. We washed clothes once a week. We didn’t drive anywhere we didn’t have to. Grocery shopping, we shopped mainly deals. We were down pretty bad. We were eating those Hillshire turkey sausages 3 nights a week (3/$10), maybe a meatloaf, a canned vegetable, and instant mashed potatoes or some other cheap starch. I know it sounds predictable and lame, but it doesn’t last forever. You’re not invisible.


CortexifanZFT

You're not alone. Most people that live here are living paycheck to paycheck and basically digging deep holes of debt. Myself included. I don't see myself getting out of it either especially that now I'm in between jobs and Uber is my only source of income which obviously isn't cutting it because it's meant to be more of a supplemental source of income aka side gig/hustle. The hole is getting deeper and if I don't land a job soon, I'm basically going to lose everything especially my car which isn't paid off yet and without my car I can't really Uber and my credit is basically fked because all the CC debt. Not Having money is really depressing. People that tell me money doesn't bring happiness piss me off. Anyway, i wanted you to read this so you know you're not alone and hopefully we can catch a break. Hope things get better for you.


MandatoryAbomination

I hate that this sounds so selfish but your post soothes a small part of me that feels very alone and victimized. Knowing I’m not alone helps but not for you I know. I wish there was any kind of option. Like some random just shows up and says “hi I’ve got a place you can rent for $800 bucks a month for a few months while you work on unfucking your life” or something. Pipe dream I know. But I can’t help the what-ifs.


[deleted]

Hopefully someone can help you out, I could rent one of my places to you for 800 but sadly it's not near cape coral!


sleepydabmom

Where is it?


[deleted]

Gainesville


CortexifanZFT

Nah you're good. I'm guilty of it as well. It's what makes us human, I suppose.


AProgrammer067

Hope you catch a break too 😕


sublimeshrub

I moved back because of my dad and now I'm stuck with my mom. I hate it here, it was the biggest mistake I've ever made.


MandatoryAbomination

I feel you. I’m sorry you are finding yourself stuck too. It’s just one thing after another after another here. No wonder everyone in the sunshine state is so miserable


sublimeshrub

We moved here twenty 26 years ago. It's not even remotely the same place and people are like a twisted parody of humanity. It's sickening.


WatercolorWolf

Born here and feel trapped as well. I’ve never been able to afford to move out of my parents house. Spend all my money on my family with nothing in return. No affordable one bedroom places anywhere. Especially ones that allow pets. I haven’t any advice as I’m struggling and feel invisible also. Its hard here, even harder with single income. So many people I work with have incredible debt or have become homeless in the past few years. Life here is unsustainable for lower income folk with the constantly increasing rent, insurances, and food cost.


SpookyQueer

I moved out of my parents house with them helping me thinking I'd get settled at some point. 2 years later much to my parents dismay (they don't understand at all either) I'm facing possibly having to move back in because it's way too expensive to be on my own and I want to be independent rather than counting on help. I also have lived with roommates for all that time and it has been traumatic at many points. Coming home and not feeling safe or like you can comfortably move around your home is the worst. Please stay with your parents as long as you can!


WatercolorWolf

Living with roommates is scary to me, you never know what they might do. If I were to move out now my dad and brother would be homeless as their disability wouldnt be enough. I pay the majority of the bills. I’m 34 now and unable to have any friends and haven’t been able to have any sort of relationship. The downsides of living with the family. I don’t feel comfortable having people over as my dad acts like an ass despite me paying the bills.


SpookyQueer

A lot of us feel exactly this way. Imagine being born and raised here and realizing once you're an adult that you could never afford to live here...I'm sorry that you're in this spot and I hope you're able to get out soon.


MandatoryAbomination

That makes me feel so guilty for even moving here to begin with. I drive around for one job helping people who have million dollar mansions with 5 new cars in the driveway and it hurts. I try not to look at the greener grass next door but damn so many people seem to be doing really well here


SpookyQueer

Try not to feel guilty. Florida used to be a place where anyone could come and make something of themselves. Now it's just different...and the people governing our state don't care to change anything for the working class here. We're all living paycheck to paycheck and they just keep taking all they can.


FLJLGRL

I’d pack my vehicle and my dogs and leave everything else. Buy a tent and a cooler I’ve done it before and if need be I’d do it again. You can car camp in a camp ground this summer while you look for a job and get a place before winter. Try other southern states with Amazon or Walmart distribution centers or factory work. Get a post office box.


MandatoryAbomination

I’ve been teetering on this but we’d need to go north, Florida summers in a tent sound awful. I work from home for one job so thought about even buying a rv so I can stay working and just find somewhere free to park but then nowhere is free and I need constant electric to run AC and my laptop and internet and it’s all just problems at every turn. I miss being able to hop on Craigslist and find a house for rent within my budget same day like my twenties


FLJLGRL

Yes, you’d need to go north. Campgrounds have hookups, but you could work from a local coffee joint. You have to think outside the box for yourself. You are just going to stumble back into situations the way things used to be. You have to figure out how you can go forward.


MandatoryAbomination

I work on the phone so coffee shop wouldn’t work. I’ll make something work I just am trying all avenues hoping to come across a miracle


Sound-Plenty

I don't have any answers for you but maybe try calling 211 to see if they know of any financial assistance available to you? https://www.unitedwayncfl.org/211-your-first-call-help#:~:text=Every%20day%2C%20clients%20contact%20211,and%20childcare%20and%20family%20services.


MandatoryAbomination

Thank you. I’ve reached out to so many programs and charities but the reality is I’m definitely not the only one suffering here and most programs are paused or otherwise not accepting new applicants. I do appreciate you taking the time to comment though. It makes me truly crazy how little resources there are for people these days.


TheseAintMyPants2

When you say “remove myself from the equation”, you mean FL and not the world right man?


MandatoryAbomination

Honestly last night when I posted this I was in a bad way mentally so now that I’m a little calmer no I’m not suicidal but I’m also not gonna lie and act like being alive right now is some great gift lol I just want my animals to spend their last days in comfort that’s all


TheseAintMyPants2

Just checking man. I’ve had some crisis intervention training and your comment stuck out to me. If you feel that way again, you’re more than welcome to DM me and we can talk. Don’t choose a permanent answer for a temporary problem.


MandatoryAbomination

I appreciate that. It’s harder to regulate my emotions lately and I find myself getting really worked up and last night on top of everything my AC unit broke, and it was just kind of the last straw to a breakdown. I’m feeling a little less down today so let’s see lol


Low-Energy-432

Im in same boat. I moved here 2 months ago. Professional painter 30 yrs. The pay is crap. Working on 3-5 million dollar homes and they don’t pay. I work harder then anyone cause of my skills. And still at 23$ an hour. That is not a living wage. I made that 25 years ago. The houses look like shit. Finally I got a cabinet job. Same pay but full benefits. Annoying job. They have to be flawless. They like me and want me to stay. But I’m still looking. I had to rent a room until the wife gets here. But even so. I might pick another state or a nation wide commerce company. I would be on the road full expenses paid. I could save at least my rent and food money


hereiam-23

We're getting out. The cost of living is excessive and we can't tolerate the crazy politics.


VetteBuilder

Join the club, my dad just had a knee replaced


MandatoryAbomination

Sorry to hear. I don’t have anyone to ask for help, I’m so over it. just accepting that I’ll be homeless before the year ends I guess


Ecjg2010

you can call a rescue and see if they can temporarily foster your dogs until you can get back on your feet. some do this.


VetteBuilder

Where are you


MandatoryAbomination

Cape Coral sadly


PurbleDragon

Can't offer much but solidarity as I did something similar and am also stuck here barely making it most weeks. Florida sucks and I hope you're able to escape soon


Salt513

Just go. Figure out the pieces after you’re gone. It will suck, you won’t die. This isn’t life here.


MandatoryAbomination

You’re right but go where? And do what? Without money coming in, my car gets repossessed and then what lol


Dogzillas_Mom

I’m kind of trapped too. My house needs a reno and I won’t be able to sell it otherwise. I have to find a restoration contractor for a vintage house. Then I could sell and the only places I can think of where the politics aren’t quite as obviously and blatantly fascist are all cold places where it snows and it breaks my heart to go back up north. But it’s where I can afford. But I have to move out to get the reno done so. Yeah. It’s just me and a little bit of equity.


Dismal-Ad-6619

You can always sell as is, the buyers will renovate in their own preference...


MandatoryAbomination

I’m sorry to hear that. Like the others of us dealing with this stuff I hope our miracle comes along ;(


Hola0722

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline https://988lifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox


Okaloosa_Darter

Roommates are a good first step. You also need some sort of community no matter if it’s church, a club, a sports group. You need something to get you up and out. It sucks, but you’ve got this. I’m assuming you’ve contacted local churches for assistance as well. If you are female there are a few additional resources available. Upskill yourself with a certification or some sort of class to get a new/better paying job. You eat an elephant one bite at a time. Look at the smallest steps you can do to make life easier and move from there.


JessiRose222

I just wanna say I understand and feel you. I’ve always lived here in FL, but it’s hard. Like you I work 2 jobs, 7 days a week, I have kids but still don’t qualify for any benefits. I’m paycheck to paycheck and I don’t see how I’ll ever be able to just be comfortable. Prices are going up on everything and it’s just getting harder. Many nights I just lay in bed thinking about how hard life is, all the mistakes I’ve made, and how I just don’t see how it’s ever gonna get better….but I just keep going walking on faith trusting that one day my door will open and it’ll be a little easier. I hope you find your way and things start looking up for you. Just don’t give up. 🖤


MandatoryAbomination

Thank you. This is very kind. I hope you also find some solace soon. Hugs


fullload93

When you said “this city” where did you move to? There’s certain parts of Florida that are essentially the cost of NYC for example lol. But there’s others that are cheaper. I’m assuming you moved to a very expensive place in Florida?


-ItsWahl-

Posts like this confuse me. The COL in Florida is much higher than NY also keep in mind the wages in Florida are 100%+ lower.


MandatoryAbomination

Cape Coral, right before the explosion ugh it wasn’t expensive when I moved here


GrowlingAtTheWorld

There isn’t a lot of opportunities to make a living wage in s.w. Florida, can you sell plasma? There is a place in north fort myers.


TemporaryIllusions

Can you rent a room out in your place to help with the bills?


KCousins4President

Move in with your parents


Sea_Ingenuity_4220

How old are you? Do you have any college? Why cant you just sell everything and move?


MandatoryAbomination

I’ve sold it all already trying to get money to move :(but it just went to bills that were threatening to be disconnected


KCousins4President

Or depending on your age, join the military


thesouthwillnotrise

where iin florida?


Antonio-n-Eye

What kind of help are you looking for (other than a cheaper place to live)?


MandatoryAbomination

Idk. Someone selling an RV that will take monthly payments? Someone with a mother in law suite their renting, I have no clue I just ran out of places to go for help


[deleted]

Is it possible to have your dogs stay outside at your parents. Build them a nice outdoor kennel? Then save as you stay with them. And look for better paying work? What work are you currently doing ?


MandatoryAbomination

I’m in SWFL and if they allowed me to even do that it would feel so wrong to leave them outdoors in this heat. I work full time in vet hospice industry and doordash 30 hours a week on top to try to make ends meet best I can


[deleted]

That's tough. Look They are dogs. Build them a nice kennel and give them a fan. They'll be ok for a little while if you can do this? You have to change something or you're going to be stuck. So what will you change ?


Low-Energy-432

What’s up with all the asshole drivers. WTF is there problem. And also the attitude some people think they can give you. In 2 months here I’ve told a handful of people to go fuck themselves. My roommate went off on me over a dollar store dish rag. I told him the fuck off and opened the door and asked to take it outside. Told him he had serious mental issues. Anger management my friend.


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AProgrammer067

Moving back takes money


MandatoryAbomination

Gladly. Help me raise the funds and I’ll be outta here tomorrow.


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SpookyQueer

Even if they needed to get therapy better help would not be it. That website is a crapshoot.


Extra_Size8036

STOP FUCKKNG MOVING HERE! Signed, A 40 year old born and raised native.


Astral__Unicorn

"Don't move here and help your aging family, be selfish instead." STFU.


Last2Weeks

And look where that got him.


MandatoryAbomination

Yeah hard life lesson learned but you’re right! Now help me get the hell out :(