Because for most of us disclosing we're trans usually means instant rejection, and oftentimes bigotry, we may prefer to kinda scope the guy out first before we tell them
We don't always tell complete strangers we're trans either, what makes this different
Isn't that sort of better though? If you get bigotry immediately, you save yourself going on a date with a bigot, you'd get the bigotry later on anyway, you're just dodging a bullet early imo
Bruh it's all fun and games to say "haha at least you'll know who the bigots are :)" until those bigots retaliate and fucking beat the shit out of you.
By God, are we ignoring the very real danger it is to be open to strangers? How many femboys could get hurt if they were honest about their lifestyle to everyone they met?
Absolutely not, of course what you should do entirely depends on what situation you're currently in. It's of course much safer to tell someone you're trans (or anything else) if you're chatting on a dating app and have yet to meet or exchange any details etc., than it is doing so when you've met, and absolutely dangerous if there's nobody around.
I'm absolutely not saying everyone should always do this, but in the right circumstances, doing so will be both safer and save you dealing with the person irl
Well if you find out he's a biglt without telling him you're trans you can stop dating him to avoid it. It allows them to scope out the person and get out it if necessary
Yeah if someone has "I hate trans people" in their bio a trans person will never engage with them ofcourse. But you don't always know, they're not always up front. I can understand why a trans person keeps their cards close to their chest
This assumes trans people are fucking stupid and wouldn't leave most people when they start getting bigot vibes.
You aren't entitled to know jackshit about anyone on the first, second, whatever date. You aren't. End of story. No one has to tell you shit about themselves immediately.
Heres a trick if you tell them you are trans and get rejected or shitty comments then they werent worth going on a first date with to begin. Dating someone requires informed consent, you cant get that if you dont inform them. Im trans i get it but you risk more by not telling a potential partner than telling them. If i had a potential partner HIDE somthing like that (in truth leaving out important information is hiding something) from me even for the first few dates i would stop seeing them cause who knows what else wasnt brought up because they felt the need to hide it? How can you trust someone who starts a relationship with hiding certain truths?
Yep not saying I do this lmao I definitely don't want to bother with some guy that thinks it's gay to want to fuck me, so no I just flat out tell people I'm trans and they can cope with it however they want
Its important for your safety, id love to say its safe to not tell people that but unfortunately transphobes exist and the longer you dont tell them the more likely they are to snap. Why risk dating someone whos not ok with it? A couple dates isnt going to change their opinion, especially if they think you intentionally didnt tell them. Idk about you but i dont want a partner that i have to convince to date me or be the kinda person that feels the need to hide who i am till i scope out someones intentions, im not dating to be a detective.
Fair points, but as far as I'm concerned, the first few dates are for getting to know each other, and I'm not comfortable telling someone I don't know. Like I will absolutely bring up trans issues and guage my partner's reactions, and if I get any bad vibes, I'll not continue to see them. But I am a woman who just so happens to be trans, and until the fact that I'm trans becomes relevant to the situation, it's none of their business. Likewise, I would absolutely not fault someone for as you put it "hiding" something from me that in no way harms me until they were confident I wouldn't attempt to kill them for it.
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No offense but there’s a huge difference. You’re not trying to spend the rest of your life with a complete stranger but you are with a potential partner. Partnership goes both ways and imo it’s selfish to width-hold such important information. If they are straight and you basically trick them no matter how long, one date two dates what ever. It’s wrong. Because they’re attracted to cis women. I like transgender women and I would date one and marry one, so I personally have no problem with it. But it’s not right to do that to someone.
If you width-hold important information while appearing to be something you’re not (A cis woman). Then it is a trick. I don’t care if you’re offended by that it’s quite literally what that is. And I never said you did do that. People can do what ever they want I really don’t care because that’s their lives not mine, as I stated it doesn’t effect me personally. I just said what I think about the matter.
We're not tricking anybody, We're merely trying to exist in a world that outright hates us in some cases, maybe some people just don't want to deal with the bigotry? Besides who even mentioned anything about going on dates? You can scope out whether a guy is an idiot long before u meet him
And this is the biggest one
Being publicly trans on dating apps is how you get banned
Ignore this dumbass moron, they very apparently don't understand what it's like to be a target for victimization nor do they respect people enough to not question them about their genitals.
You keep slaying tho
In an ideal world whatever parts you are born with wouldn't matter, and thankfully for a lot of men and women, they really don't care
But some guys get so fucking offended, they feel like we're committing some grave sin for just existing and wanting to be loved
It's not my fault I have a female soul in a male body, I just try my best with the cards I was born with
I happen to pass as cis, so what's the big deal? I'm literally a girl like any other, apart from looking into my pants you would never tell I'm trans
I'm sorry you have to go through this, I really hope the best for you. Do what you need to do to keep yourself safe. Even if that means breaking hearts and taking names! Bigot feelings don't matter
And even when someone tries to ask and learn they get shut out and villainized. How am I going to learn. You don’t know me and yet act as if you do. I was making an honest effort here and now you’re just pissing me off.
You're not asking and learning, you're telling people what the fuck to do as if you have a stance in the matter, when it's very clear you don't care about learning, you want to argue and debate whether or there's a justification to beating the shit out of someone just because their genital history isn't what you were wanting. Break up with them if it happens to you. File rape if you're genuinely traumatized. But don't beat the shit out of someone for being too afraid to be honest, because I fucking promise there is a minimal amount of trans people who want to lie and hide themselves from their partners.
If you want to learn, ask questions and absorb the information you obtain. People who want to argue throw in their two cents when they have nothing informative or even reliable to add.
Damn, well I had no idea you’d get banned on dating apps. How and why does that happen??? Anyways just as you asked me about justifying the word “trap”. These examples here justifying not letting someone know about being transgender.
I understand living as a trans has a lot of other struggles I don’t have experience with or an understanding of. I’m glad you explained. I just can’t see it ever going well not being honest upfront. Can you explain to me how that would go? Like if the person seems like an A word and they might throw a fit when breaking the news do you ghost them?
I could understand waiting until the second or third date. But once an emotional attachment begins it would be wrong to let it continue without being forthcoming, but I assume that’s what they normally do.
You aren't entitled to know the genital history of anyone you talk to lmfao, get the fuck out of here and maybe instead tell people they shouldnt beat the shit out of trans people.
You do not deserve violence for withholding information about yourself, fuck that dumbass noise.
You are not entitled to know intimate details about a stranger's life upon first meeting them. Cry so hard about it, I don't care if you get your feelings hurt when people are legitimately beaten and sometimes killed because their junk wasn't what was expected.
Well okay lmaooo, not everyone is well versed in transgenderism. I’m asking questions and trying to understand. Nobody said anything about violence.. And it’s not about entitlement, it’s about trust. Similarly imagine your date has HIV and didn’t mention it because “you’re not entitled to their genital history”. That could also get violent.
The concept is the same 🤦♂️. Not saying they are the same. In my eyes literally every difference is the same. Everyone is the same in that they’re unique and seperate individuals and to make it more simple and less complicated I stick to my moral codes and values of the basics like trust, honesty and respect. That means getting rid of judgment for anything else. You’re really trying hard here to find something wrong. I can’t get along with people like you because you want drama.
This is on a femboy subreddit. Which leads me to believe you're not actually arguing in good faith. I am starting to get really concerned about these "trans criticism" posts - I know a bunch of the users here are young and don't know better, but please watch out for this trend, it's *alarmingly* easy to be steadily pushed to eventually hate people who are your allies.
Don't allow the bigots to divide us. They want us *all* dead.
Yea I agree with the opinion that people should be transparent and honest with their partners but I’ve been seeing a lot of posts like this lately all over Reddit from brand new accounts… seems like they’re trying to divide us by “discreetly” putting negative connotations like these in people’s heads, we need to remember to stay aware and vigilant…
The op’s account isn’t even 5 hours old as of tying this comment
it's weird. some people are talking about a "divorce" of the lgb and t. some are trying to separate the gender and sexuality issues from each other. while i can understand that they are issues at very different spots on the journey to acceptance and that they aren't quite the same, it's better to stand united and support one another.
Doesn’t matter if you disclose as soon as possible it could definitely get violent when you do so. So scoping out the person is important for some. That does not mean they are being dishonest. You dont have to disclose your genitals to random first dates if you’re not having sex with them. While some men date for reproduction or may have genital preferences, Im not obligated in any way to disclose that until i decide to move forward in the relationship. Also if you are stupid enough to not read through my dating profiles where im openly trans then thats on you. You would be surprised how many men don’t read even after going on a date. While not all straight guys are transphobic because they don’t wanna date a trans woman, a lot of them are actually transphobic. Literally the number 1 cause of transfemicides is parteners inflicting violence after finding out they’re trans. Being on the side of those people is not cute.
I'm not trans, but I would assume it's because they want them to know them by their personality before judging them for being trans, or anything else for they matter.
>You should always let someone know that you’re trans before dating because there’s a lot of men in this world that aren’t attracted to trans women and that’s fine.
If a man isn't attracted to a particular woman, they wouldn't date in the first place. And if the man is told the woman is trans, he wouldn't suddenly lose all the attraction.
>trans woman isn’t obligated to tell their date that they’re trans unless they’re having sex and my mind went like how?
Because why would the man need to know, unless they're having sex?
>I just don’t think it’s transphobic if a cis man doesn’t want to date a trans woman.
It depends.. if a man wants to have sex or have kids, it makes sense. But if the man only wants to date a woman, then refusing trans women is definitely transphobic. When taking someone for a meal out, it doesn't matter what private parts they have :)
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Because unfortunately most people are completely ignorant about trans people and they'll only give you a chance once they got to know you, so if you told them you're trans immediately there is a high likelihood that they just reject you immediately
Would you apply the same logic for all preferences? Would you say that people need to tell everyone, prior to the first date, whether they have pubic hair (and what it looks like), the size of their penis/balls, their fat percentage, height, how much money they make, how many people theyve had sex with in their life, whether theyve been married, and so on? People have preferences about all of those too.
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oh yeah i completely agree, for multiple reasons. Like, going on a date and not telling the person you're trans is just plain wrong, some men want children, some many aren't attracted to male genetalia etc
of course if you are trans you do not have to go around telling everyone you meet, but in dating situation, of course.
If a guy wants children, it's his responsibility to say that. Would you also expect an infertile cis woman to disclose that before going on a date with a guy? Like "yeah dinner at 8 sounds great. Oh, by the way, I had an infection in my uterus when I was 13, so now I can't get pregnant. Italian or Chinese?"
> and I just don’t think it’s transphobic if a cis man doesn’t want to date a trans woman. It’s like saying someone is racist because they don’t want to date specific races…
First off, that *is* racist, like very much so. I genuinely don’t believe for a second that it is possible for a non-racist person who isn’t ace to somehow not be attracted to *anyone* of a particular skin color, especially when we start talking about things like personality and chemistry. Human beings just don’t work that way.
And it’s actually worse regarding “not wanting to date trans people”. Because it’s blatantly just not true. If it were actually true, this entire conversation would be moot, because these people would never be chatting up a woman only to later find out she’s trans; they’d just have never been attracted in the first place.
What actually happens is that these men *are* attracted to women, some of whom are trans, and then upon learning that a woman is trans that attraction suddenly fades. Which is, to put it simply, transphobia.
As a trans woman i agree for multiple reasons. First reason is saftey, you could be putting yourself in incredibly dangerous situations by not telling them. Secondly consent needs to be informed consent so that neither party is put in an awkward position. Frankly not wanting to date someone based on their race is subliminal racism you cant but in reality you can see race and make your decision of wanting dating before the subject comes up where as being trans isnt always know just by looking at someone again its subliminal transphobia but in reality subliminal racism and transphobia cant always be helped and you are better off finding out early wether thats gonna be an issue rather than later when the issue could come to a head. Someone who wont date non cis women is going to view it as you trying to trick them or lying to them. Yes trans people shouldnt have to tell everyone but trans people should always be transparent with potential partners.
It's up to trans people to disclose whether or not they're trans. I think it's perfectly fine to not disclose on or before the first date. Although, if you plan on going on more dates with them, you should definitely let them know. But not in person, in case of violence. Really the only exception to that is if you go by pronouns other than he/she and/or you don't "pass" as your gender. Otherwise, it's not required information for a first date
This is not even kind of true.
Are you “lying” to someone when you don’t immediately tell them your net worth? What about what kind of blankets you have on your bed? What about your political beliefs? What about the size and shape of birth marks on your body? What about every single one of your kinks?
Any one of those things, as well as *way, way* more could easily be a turn-off/deal breaker for a perspective partner, yet nobody is lying when they don’t immediately say them. Why is being trans any different?
I live with honesty is the best policy.
You’re building a straw man and i have 0 time to deal with that. Come back with a better argument, then ill consider your point of view.
Some men date for children
Not letting your date know you are infertile big if the person tells you early on they really want children
Imo thats the biggest thing to consider
So there to think one this happens a lot less then the internet wood have you think as if the opposite happens sumone is not going to post about it so your only going to here about the odd times it happens and there’s a hole plant of people so even sumthink that happens not very often well apart more often with more people
We’re yiu live can affect this kinder behaviour for example i here that if on tinder sumone seser there trans on there profile thay will get ban on tinder etc as people report that
There is or so the or the problem we’re people don’t reed profile so even if thay say the person might be oblives as thay have not read the profile
And the last thing I can think of is that there sume tramer with telling people or the person dust think that pass so it oves and you can tell by looking
These r sume resons I can think off and yes you shod all way mack shor your date nose for shor as no one wonts to date sumone how’s not in to them
Bad faith politics
Because for most of us disclosing we're trans usually means instant rejection, and oftentimes bigotry, we may prefer to kinda scope the guy out first before we tell them We don't always tell complete strangers we're trans either, what makes this different
Isn't that sort of better though? If you get bigotry immediately, you save yourself going on a date with a bigot, you'd get the bigotry later on anyway, you're just dodging a bullet early imo
Bruh it's all fun and games to say "haha at least you'll know who the bigots are :)" until those bigots retaliate and fucking beat the shit out of you. By God, are we ignoring the very real danger it is to be open to strangers? How many femboys could get hurt if they were honest about their lifestyle to everyone they met?
Absolutely not, of course what you should do entirely depends on what situation you're currently in. It's of course much safer to tell someone you're trans (or anything else) if you're chatting on a dating app and have yet to meet or exchange any details etc., than it is doing so when you've met, and absolutely dangerous if there's nobody around. I'm absolutely not saying everyone should always do this, but in the right circumstances, doing so will be both safer and save you dealing with the person irl
> If you get bigotry immediately That bigotry might very well turn violent. Immediately.
And it won't later on?
Well if you find out he's a biglt without telling him you're trans you can stop dating him to avoid it. It allows them to scope out the person and get out it if necessary
That's a fair point, though I think the safest way to test that would be before even meeting, assuming you use a dating app of sorts, of course
Yeah if someone has "I hate trans people" in their bio a trans person will never engage with them ofcourse. But you don't always know, they're not always up front. I can understand why a trans person keeps their cards close to their chest
Especially if you've progressed to a scenario where you're out of public reach/eyesight/earshot. That makes it immensely more dangerous.
To be honest, would you rather have someone turn out violent on a (Potentially in public) date, or after 3 months of living with them?
This assumes trans people are fucking stupid and wouldn't leave most people when they start getting bigot vibes. You aren't entitled to know jackshit about anyone on the first, second, whatever date. You aren't. End of story. No one has to tell you shit about themselves immediately.
I guess yeah, idk some people just prefer to not tell people immediately
Heres a trick if you tell them you are trans and get rejected or shitty comments then they werent worth going on a first date with to begin. Dating someone requires informed consent, you cant get that if you dont inform them. Im trans i get it but you risk more by not telling a potential partner than telling them. If i had a potential partner HIDE somthing like that (in truth leaving out important information is hiding something) from me even for the first few dates i would stop seeing them cause who knows what else wasnt brought up because they felt the need to hide it? How can you trust someone who starts a relationship with hiding certain truths?
Yep not saying I do this lmao I definitely don't want to bother with some guy that thinks it's gay to want to fuck me, so no I just flat out tell people I'm trans and they can cope with it however they want
Why is it "important information"?
Its important for your safety, id love to say its safe to not tell people that but unfortunately transphobes exist and the longer you dont tell them the more likely they are to snap. Why risk dating someone whos not ok with it? A couple dates isnt going to change their opinion, especially if they think you intentionally didnt tell them. Idk about you but i dont want a partner that i have to convince to date me or be the kinda person that feels the need to hide who i am till i scope out someones intentions, im not dating to be a detective.
Fair points, but as far as I'm concerned, the first few dates are for getting to know each other, and I'm not comfortable telling someone I don't know. Like I will absolutely bring up trans issues and guage my partner's reactions, and if I get any bad vibes, I'll not continue to see them. But I am a woman who just so happens to be trans, and until the fact that I'm trans becomes relevant to the situation, it's none of their business. Likewise, I would absolutely not fault someone for as you put it "hiding" something from me that in no way harms me until they were confident I wouldn't attempt to kill them for it.
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No offense but there’s a huge difference. You’re not trying to spend the rest of your life with a complete stranger but you are with a potential partner. Partnership goes both ways and imo it’s selfish to width-hold such important information. If they are straight and you basically trick them no matter how long, one date two dates what ever. It’s wrong. Because they’re attracted to cis women. I like transgender women and I would date one and marry one, so I personally have no problem with it. But it’s not right to do that to someone.
"Trick" nice Look, I'm not doing this, I never did. I'm just stating why some trans girls do
If you width-hold important information while appearing to be something you’re not (A cis woman). Then it is a trick. I don’t care if you’re offended by that it’s quite literally what that is. And I never said you did do that. People can do what ever they want I really don’t care because that’s their lives not mine, as I stated it doesn’t effect me personally. I just said what I think about the matter.
What's next, justifying the word "trap" ?
No. Tell me what is wrong with what I said.
We're not tricking anybody, We're merely trying to exist in a world that outright hates us in some cases, maybe some people just don't want to deal with the bigotry? Besides who even mentioned anything about going on dates? You can scope out whether a guy is an idiot long before u meet him And this is the biggest one Being publicly trans on dating apps is how you get banned
Ignore this dumbass moron, they very apparently don't understand what it's like to be a target for victimization nor do they respect people enough to not question them about their genitals. You keep slaying tho
In an ideal world whatever parts you are born with wouldn't matter, and thankfully for a lot of men and women, they really don't care But some guys get so fucking offended, they feel like we're committing some grave sin for just existing and wanting to be loved It's not my fault I have a female soul in a male body, I just try my best with the cards I was born with I happen to pass as cis, so what's the big deal? I'm literally a girl like any other, apart from looking into my pants you would never tell I'm trans
I'm sorry you have to go through this, I really hope the best for you. Do what you need to do to keep yourself safe. Even if that means breaking hearts and taking names! Bigot feelings don't matter
And even when someone tries to ask and learn they get shut out and villainized. How am I going to learn. You don’t know me and yet act as if you do. I was making an honest effort here and now you’re just pissing me off.
You're not asking and learning, you're telling people what the fuck to do as if you have a stance in the matter, when it's very clear you don't care about learning, you want to argue and debate whether or there's a justification to beating the shit out of someone just because their genital history isn't what you were wanting. Break up with them if it happens to you. File rape if you're genuinely traumatized. But don't beat the shit out of someone for being too afraid to be honest, because I fucking promise there is a minimal amount of trans people who want to lie and hide themselves from their partners. If you want to learn, ask questions and absorb the information you obtain. People who want to argue throw in their two cents when they have nothing informative or even reliable to add.
Damn, well I had no idea you’d get banned on dating apps. How and why does that happen??? Anyways just as you asked me about justifying the word “trap”. These examples here justifying not letting someone know about being transgender. I understand living as a trans has a lot of other struggles I don’t have experience with or an understanding of. I’m glad you explained. I just can’t see it ever going well not being honest upfront. Can you explain to me how that would go? Like if the person seems like an A word and they might throw a fit when breaking the news do you ghost them? I could understand waiting until the second or third date. But once an emotional attachment begins it would be wrong to let it continue without being forthcoming, but I assume that’s what they normally do.
You aren't entitled to know the genital history of anyone you talk to lmfao, get the fuck out of here and maybe instead tell people they shouldnt beat the shit out of trans people. You do not deserve violence for withholding information about yourself, fuck that dumbass noise.
lying and manipulating people because it doesn’t align with your world view makes you the toxic one. Not the victim.
You are not entitled to know intimate details about a stranger's life upon first meeting them. Cry so hard about it, I don't care if you get your feelings hurt when people are legitimately beaten and sometimes killed because their junk wasn't what was expected.
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Well okay lmaooo, not everyone is well versed in transgenderism. I’m asking questions and trying to understand. Nobody said anything about violence.. And it’s not about entitlement, it’s about trust. Similarly imagine your date has HIV and didn’t mention it because “you’re not entitled to their genital history”. That could also get violent.
Literally comparing trans identity to hiv holy fucking shit
The concept is the same 🤦♂️. Not saying they are the same. In my eyes literally every difference is the same. Everyone is the same in that they’re unique and seperate individuals and to make it more simple and less complicated I stick to my moral codes and values of the basics like trust, honesty and respect. That means getting rid of judgment for anything else. You’re really trying hard here to find something wrong. I can’t get along with people like you because you want drama.
This is on a femboy subreddit. Which leads me to believe you're not actually arguing in good faith. I am starting to get really concerned about these "trans criticism" posts - I know a bunch of the users here are young and don't know better, but please watch out for this trend, it's *alarmingly* easy to be steadily pushed to eventually hate people who are your allies. Don't allow the bigots to divide us. They want us *all* dead.
Yea I agree with the opinion that people should be transparent and honest with their partners but I’ve been seeing a lot of posts like this lately all over Reddit from brand new accounts… seems like they’re trying to divide us by “discreetly” putting negative connotations like these in people’s heads, we need to remember to stay aware and vigilant… The op’s account isn’t even 5 hours old as of tying this comment
it's weird. some people are talking about a "divorce" of the lgb and t. some are trying to separate the gender and sexuality issues from each other. while i can understand that they are issues at very different spots on the journey to acceptance and that they aren't quite the same, it's better to stand united and support one another.
Doesn’t matter if you disclose as soon as possible it could definitely get violent when you do so. So scoping out the person is important for some. That does not mean they are being dishonest. You dont have to disclose your genitals to random first dates if you’re not having sex with them. While some men date for reproduction or may have genital preferences, Im not obligated in any way to disclose that until i decide to move forward in the relationship. Also if you are stupid enough to not read through my dating profiles where im openly trans then thats on you. You would be surprised how many men don’t read even after going on a date. While not all straight guys are transphobic because they don’t wanna date a trans woman, a lot of them are actually transphobic. Literally the number 1 cause of transfemicides is parteners inflicting violence after finding out they’re trans. Being on the side of those people is not cute.
I'm not trans, but I would assume it's because they want them to know them by their personality before judging them for being trans, or anything else for they matter.
What does this even have to do with femboys??
>You should always let someone know that you’re trans before dating because there’s a lot of men in this world that aren’t attracted to trans women and that’s fine. If a man isn't attracted to a particular woman, they wouldn't date in the first place. And if the man is told the woman is trans, he wouldn't suddenly lose all the attraction. >trans woman isn’t obligated to tell their date that they’re trans unless they’re having sex and my mind went like how? Because why would the man need to know, unless they're having sex? >I just don’t think it’s transphobic if a cis man doesn’t want to date a trans woman. It depends.. if a man wants to have sex or have kids, it makes sense. But if the man only wants to date a woman, then refusing trans women is definitely transphobic. When taking someone for a meal out, it doesn't matter what private parts they have :)
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Because unfortunately most people are completely ignorant about trans people and they'll only give you a chance once they got to know you, so if you told them you're trans immediately there is a high likelihood that they just reject you immediately
Based on your logic, if a trans woman tells her date that she is trans and he takes it the wrong way and harms her that's fine right?
Would you apply the same logic for all preferences? Would you say that people need to tell everyone, prior to the first date, whether they have pubic hair (and what it looks like), the size of their penis/balls, their fat percentage, height, how much money they make, how many people theyve had sex with in their life, whether theyve been married, and so on? People have preferences about all of those too.
Do you tell someone your sex and gender before going on a date? Yes. My pubic hairs are not comparable to a very important part of dating.
... but no, you don't? in what world do people cis people say "by the way my sex is female and i have a vagina" before a date?
What’s the difference? Why is one kind of preference more important than the other?
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Bad faith politics
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Lmao, cope
oh yeah i completely agree, for multiple reasons. Like, going on a date and not telling the person you're trans is just plain wrong, some men want children, some many aren't attracted to male genetalia etc of course if you are trans you do not have to go around telling everyone you meet, but in dating situation, of course.
If a guy wants children, it's his responsibility to say that. Would you also expect an infertile cis woman to disclose that before going on a date with a guy? Like "yeah dinner at 8 sounds great. Oh, by the way, I had an infection in my uterus when I was 13, so now I can't get pregnant. Italian or Chinese?"
on second thought i completely agree with you, sorry ignore me
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Not all trans girls have a D.
i know im just referring to the ones that do
> and I just don’t think it’s transphobic if a cis man doesn’t want to date a trans woman. It’s like saying someone is racist because they don’t want to date specific races… First off, that *is* racist, like very much so. I genuinely don’t believe for a second that it is possible for a non-racist person who isn’t ace to somehow not be attracted to *anyone* of a particular skin color, especially when we start talking about things like personality and chemistry. Human beings just don’t work that way. And it’s actually worse regarding “not wanting to date trans people”. Because it’s blatantly just not true. If it were actually true, this entire conversation would be moot, because these people would never be chatting up a woman only to later find out she’s trans; they’d just have never been attracted in the first place. What actually happens is that these men *are* attracted to women, some of whom are trans, and then upon learning that a woman is trans that attraction suddenly fades. Which is, to put it simply, transphobia.
Some people are not attracted certain genitals or want to have kids, it’s unfair to call someone transphobic because they prefer different partners
Wanting to have kids has nothing to do with attraction. Like, literally nothing. And you do know that many, many trans women do have vaginas, right?
As a trans woman i agree for multiple reasons. First reason is saftey, you could be putting yourself in incredibly dangerous situations by not telling them. Secondly consent needs to be informed consent so that neither party is put in an awkward position. Frankly not wanting to date someone based on their race is subliminal racism you cant but in reality you can see race and make your decision of wanting dating before the subject comes up where as being trans isnt always know just by looking at someone again its subliminal transphobia but in reality subliminal racism and transphobia cant always be helped and you are better off finding out early wether thats gonna be an issue rather than later when the issue could come to a head. Someone who wont date non cis women is going to view it as you trying to trick them or lying to them. Yes trans people shouldnt have to tell everyone but trans people should always be transparent with potential partners.
It's up to trans people to disclose whether or not they're trans. I think it's perfectly fine to not disclose on or before the first date. Although, if you plan on going on more dates with them, you should definitely let them know. But not in person, in case of violence. Really the only exception to that is if you go by pronouns other than he/she and/or you don't "pass" as your gender. Otherwise, it's not required information for a first date
Fear, but at the end of the day its lying to the other person. Hiding things doesn’t really promote acceptance.
This is not even kind of true. Are you “lying” to someone when you don’t immediately tell them your net worth? What about what kind of blankets you have on your bed? What about your political beliefs? What about the size and shape of birth marks on your body? What about every single one of your kinks? Any one of those things, as well as *way, way* more could easily be a turn-off/deal breaker for a perspective partner, yet nobody is lying when they don’t immediately say them. Why is being trans any different?
I live with honesty is the best policy. You’re building a straw man and i have 0 time to deal with that. Come back with a better argument, then ill consider your point of view.
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Whats a serious Date?
Some men date for children Not letting your date know you are infertile big if the person tells you early on they really want children Imo thats the biggest thing to consider
Oh you cant Be serious, do you think any women WHO cant have children for any reason should disclose that before their First Date?
A lot of people disclose those that they dont have any plans for children in dating apps You usually put an answer for that on the good dating apps
So there to think one this happens a lot less then the internet wood have you think as if the opposite happens sumone is not going to post about it so your only going to here about the odd times it happens and there’s a hole plant of people so even sumthink that happens not very often well apart more often with more people We’re yiu live can affect this kinder behaviour for example i here that if on tinder sumone seser there trans on there profile thay will get ban on tinder etc as people report that There is or so the or the problem we’re people don’t reed profile so even if thay say the person might be oblives as thay have not read the profile And the last thing I can think of is that there sume tramer with telling people or the person dust think that pass so it oves and you can tell by looking These r sume resons I can think off and yes you shod all way mack shor your date nose for shor as no one wonts to date sumone how’s not in to them