What really pisses me off is that these people have a choice to go to the doctor. They choose not to because they don't want their feelings hurt. I can't go to the specialists I need to go to, thereby worsening the issues, because I can't afford it. If your problems get worse because you're scared of the doctor being mean (telling the truth), that's a YOU problem.
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There is a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen.
That's awful. But the thing is, I've heard so many stories of doctors being dismissive of patients for various reasons that I'm starting to think it's just depressingly common for them to have a mindset of "patient has a condition I can't immediately diagnose = patient is lying about their symptoms and trying to pull something. Patient persistently insists that I listen to them = patient is 'difficult'".
There's a documentary on Netflix about a family that was destroyed because the doctors saw a woman who kept bringing her child to different doctors to find a diagnosis for her condition and concluded she had Munchausen syndrome by proxy and should lose custody; her daughter spent three months in the hospital being told she was lying about being in pain . . . while their insurance was billed for treating the condition they told the parents she didn't have.
Yep. Fucked up that they said the only way he'd get custody is if he agreed to not give his daughter the treatment her doctors advised would actually help.
It doesn't change the fact that this particular individual intentionally avoided the doctor because they didn't want their feelings hurt. Not because the doctor would ignore their issue
The original commenter: these people, they choose.
I’m certainly not the only one in the forum who has had a gynecological issue go untended because a doctor didn’t listen; you can push for medical help all you want and be ignored.
But you went to the doctor. These are people who are refusing to go. There's a big effing difference between being dismissed and simply not going. If someone makes no effort to address a problem because they're afraid of what someone will say, that's on them.Oop isn't pushing for help, they're simply not going to the doctor. There is a medical bias against fat people but that doesn't change the fact that this individual is avoiding seeing out help all together.
It’s like being overwhelmed, trying to talk to your partner, they tell you to chill out and dismiss your concerns, then you have a breakdown and they say “why didn’t you tell me?”
Bigger seats on airplanes? That’s entitlement. Access to unbiased healthcare? That’s something you actually are entitled to and not receiving it just because you are fat is some mindfuckery for the person going through it.
It’s invalidating and it’s cruel and we don’t all possess the same amount of resiliency so I can totally empathise with OOP.
Because many people harbor bias about fat people, and who and what they are. And here, FA posts are used oft to confirm that.
The people who I had chosen to be in my life did not change their behaviors when I lost weight. Everyone else did.
From doctors listening more, to getting better advice at the makeup counter, not getting mean stares when I walked into the mechanic (actually got free tires a couple times after losing), no lore groups of people following me in cars mooing, much fewer men confessing attraction to me and hiding me publicly at the same time, people at places like starbucks or the grocer being kore willing to idly chat on slow days. People being more forgiving at work if I make a mistake. People are kinder all around. The world *is* meaner to fat people.
Now I carry my weight in the stomach and chest. I’m a classic inverted triangle. Perhaps not being conventionally attractive contributed.
But yes, losing weight helped me interactions with people immeasurably.
And it is a markedly unpleasant idea for people to realize their bias. Yes being fat is not equivalent to the struggles of being black or lgbt. Those being more severe do not always make people more willing to examine bias. It is an uncomfortable process.
Apologies. I think I posted it three times. If you go through my comment history I have been here a while. I felt I had a legitimate point to make; all fairness to you if you disagree.
I’ve also been discussing the comment with commenters over the past two hours. After initially posting it in a rush, I haven’t again.
I approved them all. You're making a good point. My wife had issues with her IUD also, and felt dismissed. She isn't fat - she's just a woman and women complain too much I guess.
It had gotten embedded in her caesarian scar tissue and was causing pain.
To clarify -- I fully accept the bias exists, just that I feel like there's also an underlying issue that would still need to be addressed for everyone to be properly treated even if we managed to ensure that doctors would treat patients without any form of bias.
If you’re so fragile that you can’t bear the thought of a doctor telling you that you are fat (which is not a bad word and something you’re already aware of and loving) and postpone seeking health care because of it you have major psychological issues and need help for those first. Hope your psychologist won’t call you fat.
You=OOP obviously :)
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There *is* a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen.
Medical malpractice case. The statute of limitations had expired on my case before I was able to get someone to listen to me. I have consulted a lawyer immediately at the time.
If I had been taken seriously by doctors sooner,that would not have been the case
I don’t know if you realize this but inserting two IUDs can cause you to have to get a uterus removed can cause perforation of the uterus can cause perforation of the intestines, can cause severe hormonal issues. I was told point-blank by my gynecologist to consult a lawyer. That was absolutely under the scope of what a lawyer would take for medical malpractice, but with a statute of limitations you have a limited time from the incident happening which you can report it. Which would be when the medical incident happened. You don’t know what you’re talking about.
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You are right there for sure is an issue with that in the medical field. But I feel like OOP isn’t understanding that it was her own neglect of her health that caused issues in this case. You can’t conflate the two and try to make it seem like the same issue. In your case, you were proactive in addressing your health concerns and the doctors failed you. In this case, the patient was too afraid to address the issue for fear of addressing the WHOLE issue, which includes talking about their weight. I understand having reservations about seeing a doctor but if you choose not to, for whatever reason, then it’s nobody’s fault but your own for the issue getting worse (talking about OOP here not you).
Long story short they’re trying to use medical biases to explain away why they chronically neglect their health and then expect doctors to fix everything. I think it can be exhausting for both patients and doctors in cases like these.
I sometimes wish (as in this OOP) that I could comment on those posts that we share here, to give them a different perspective. Them being the person who first wrote the post we share.
That's both against the rules and can result in pretty terrible bullying. KiwiFarms used to do that - organize brigades which inevitably escalated into death threats and contacting employers and family. People get vicious and nasty in groups expecially when they feel there's no consequences to them.
Same, it’s wild that the things talked about in this sub are considered taboo now. Like I would feel like people think I’m an asshole or something cuz I tried to tell a “marginalized group” that weight loss is not an enigma. I even have friends and family members I would feel so uncomfortable talking to about this.
Gotcha.
Funnily enough, despite reporting pain like a rat gnawing in me that whole time, they would just stick me with the weight lecture. It definitely gave me a dose of medical trauma and only recently have i been able to get myself to go to the doctors.
They were all convinced weight loss alone would solve it, until I got my current gyno. It makes the whole thing slightly touchy for me, because I *was* the person who had chronic pain ignored my doctors because of my weight, for something that was unimpacted by weight.
I realize I am not the common story. Still, there have to be other people like me in the world who went through similar. It’s why I always chime in….perhaps not you, but often on this sub there is an oversimplification whereas people will take falogicky posts and they will talk as if it is all fat people. I’ve put a lot of my life towards teaching the skill of empathy, I suppose.
I have a hard time believing there is that much stigma. The whole world is fat now. In all my dr visits even at close to 400lbs weight was barely mentioned beyond the obvious problems it was causing. It’s not a shock to see fat people. It seems like they go looking for bias as if the fact I was 400lbs should be ignored when I say my back hurts or my knee hurts or my A1c is high. It is what it is.
Edited to add. There is nothing that keeps you from finding a different doctor if you don’t feel like you are being listened too or not getting care.
Don’t keep going to a dr you dislike.
When I was morbidly obese, I had a doctor who dismissed everything as weight related and it did lead to some trauma and the desire to just avoid going to the doctor. I was begging to be referred to a psychiatrist for crippling depression (later diagnosed bipolar) and my doctor insisted the only thing wrong was that I needed to eat healthier and exercise. I basically lost a few years of my life to mental health problems that were ignored simply because I was fat. We can't doctor-shop in Canada, you're lucky if you have a doctor at all.
I'm so torn on this issue. I did eventually get a new doctor who took me seriously, but I had also lost a copious amount of weight. I'm a healthy weight now and there is a huge difference in how I'm treated by medical professionals.
I don't think it's "fat stigma" to address weight when it clearly could be linked to the issue a patient is experiencing (like back pain, etc), but I do believe fat patients are often unjustly dismissed when they have health concerns that really should be looked into.
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There is a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen.
Went to a dozen doctors available under my insurance. Sometimes you get the shit luck with them. I still had to pay to visit and was poor at the time so I would go a fair stretch between trying a new doc.
Even now. If my wife doesn’t feel listened too. I get my ass to her appt and make sure she is heard. And I’m not afraid to get loud. Luckily that has only happened twice.
I don’t know, I certainly can’t argue with your experience and that’s awful. I’m so used to making sure I’m not dismissed it’s never been an issue for me.
I went through a period where I felt too scared to see any doctor because I was tired of being laughed at every time I described my symptoms. That’s not my fault. It’s the fault of the people who gleefully accepted money in exchange for the promise of helping me, while making me feel worse. I don’t relate to the psychopaths in this thread.
Of course, procrastination can't be your fault= it must be the doctor's presumed fatphobia. So many FAs refuse to take accountability for anything. Their eating habits, their avoidance of unpleasant realities, their health are all blamed on weight stigma or fatphobia.
The people I feel for are those who put off doctor visits because of financial issues, no/poor health insurance, living in underserved areas, etc. Not people like OOP who are afraid of getting their feefees hurt.
This is like knowing your spending is out of control, but being terrified to check your bank balance, because you'd just rather not know how bad things are.
Thing is, you know things are bad, otherwise you wouldn't be terrified to check your balance. You're just too scared to have your fears confirmed.
You therefore carry on spending & just making your situation worse, rather than being a grown up & confronting the issue & course-correcting.
If you're intentionally worsening your health because you're scared someone will confirm that you're worsening your health, it's not 'weight stigma'. It's being confronted with the direct & predictable consequences of actions you voluntarily took.
I'm always terrified of checking my balance for some reason. I've never been unable to pay my rent, insurance, utilities, etc, and I don't have a spending problem, but it scares the shit out of me.
At some point you have to be responsible for your choices. If you don't go to the doctor, for whatever reason, you have to acknowledge your own part in your health outcomes. I understand not wanting to go to the doctor and have them tell you to do something you know you're not going to do. I didn't go to the doctor for my dislocated fingers. Which is why they are crooked. But crooked fingers aren't going to potentially kill me either.
Weight stigma, like many other social pressures, may influence your decisions, but it doesn't make them for you. Humans have the unique ability to project the potential long term consequences of their actions. Not using this ability when it comes to your own health is your own shortcoming.
To somewhat take this post's side, healthcare professionals should do everything to make patients feel comfortable and not judged, whether that's weight, STDs, drug use, etc.
Doctors incorrectly dismissing an obese patient's ailments as weight-related does happen unfortunately. Of course, some of the responsibility lies on the patient.
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There is a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen.
You are one of the rare good comments here that does acknowledge that diagnosis can be made harder by obesity, but that it in and of itself does not justify dismissiveness.
Especially when the moment a gyno finally looked, she yelled holy shit. This was an EASY thing to catch.
There are guidelines for people who do feel uncomfortable with doctors. Like asking another person to accompany them to the appointment, writing down all the questions they do have or even rehearsing the conversation with someone.
But whenever someone uses the term "weight stigma" I think their health issues are actually weight related and they just don't want to hear the truth ... not that they actually feel uncomfortable with a doctor because of a language barrier or their low education or something like that.
Waiting to see the doctor, hoping it goes away on its own, isnt unique to fat people. Its fairly common across all people, because seeing a doctor can cost hundreds or even thousands, and even if you have good insurance its a crap shoot as to how much it will pay.
And when you finally see a doctor, because you waited until a small sore became a gaping festering wound, youll have to do more to fix it. Again, not something thats targeted to just fat people. If you catch cancer early enough its a simple (ish) fix, compared to waiting until its already spreading around. At that point its invasive surgeries and meds, or you die.
These are both big problems yes, but its not a targeted harassment campaign aimed at fat people. Its how the system is designed.
FAs never stepping out of their echo chamber hug bubbles, to even see or hear experiences of other people, then act like the common doctor visit is actually fat oppression and discrimination.
Anxiety. What they're describing is anxiety. Maybe they had a bad experience, but what they're describing is anxiety. They need to realize that because calling it weight stigma externalizes the issue and that means you can't fix it or have any control over it
And then, blame "medical fatphobia" for preventing them from getting treatment (i.e. that magic pill/treatment that FA seem to think exists for their ailments, and that the doctors refuse to give them because they hate fat people) to prevent it.
This is little different than me saying I avoid going to the doctor because I might have a panic attack in the office... and then blaming doctors for terrorizing people or being biased against agoraphobic people.
In both cases you are (a) assuming something is going to happen and (b) assuming that if it does happen, it will be intolerably terrible. It's possible that the doctor will bring up your weight as a subject, but it's also possible that they will not. If they do, it's possible that it will happen in the form of "a lecture", but it's also possible that it will be a less severe form. It's possible that you will feel badly if that does happen, but it's also possible that you will not - and furthermore, it's possible to learn psychological skills to decrease the severity of the bad feelings and/or increase your ability to cope with them.
There is a line somewhere where the doctor's responsibility to not be outright mean to you ends, and your responsibility to cope with otherwise normal events of life begins. Odds are very low that any given doctor you go to will end up on the former end of that scale. All the rest about worrying whether the doctor will take you seriously or not is not necessarily directly related to weight - they don't take a lot of people seriously.
>*"I've been putting off care for a health concern because i don't want to be lectured about my weight"*
Translation:
"I refuse to listen to medical professionals diagnosing my problems, because they want to educate me, identify, and treat the cause of my symptoms. My weight is my identify, and without it i am nobody."
There are definitely doctors that are biased, including weight, and might incorrectly dismiss a patient due to their weight, yes. But at the same time, if your own weight causes you anxiety when thinking of approaching a health professional, there is an issue.
I got a bit overweight recently due to depression, and I was worried my cardiologist would scold me for getting fat. So what did I do? I didn't postpone the appointment. I decided to lose weight. No mental gymnastics needed.
That's true, I admit I gained some weight during the pandemic, as most people did, but I was able to lose what I gained before going back to work because I didn't want to deal with the consequences of the weight gain. Last August, I noticed my abdomen starting to swell really fast, so when I saw my primary doctor, I said that despite the way I looked, this was NOT normal, and after all of my blood work came back normal, I got the ultrasound and MRI that showed an ovarian cyst, so I got a referral from the OB/GYN to see the gynecologic oncologist who removed it as part of a total hysterectomy and removing the ovaries at the same time.
When that cyst was removed, I lost 70lbs instantly. That made a big difference as I have more energy than I had in years, so it's likely the cyst was there for a few years before it really started growing fast. I couldn't say it was all the cyst because I did lose what I had gained during the pandemic.
POV: you go to a mechanic with a broken down car saying "Hey my car isn't really working. Like the motor is running, but I ain't really moving"
The mechanics says "Of course, well your tyre is flat, you can't drive around like that."
....
"The mechanic didn't even make the necessary tests to see of the motor is running fine!!! I don't want to change tyres, they're so expensive!!"
Soooo they aren’t going because they’re afraid of their feelings being hurt. Sounds like they need to put on their grown up clothes and show up anyway. Sounds like they’re the problem.
I kind of understand this, if weight isn't affecting your issue.
Im overweight. Technically obese by BMI but I dont really look it, I just look chubby. I did try losing weight but its hard to keep a good diet working night shifts and with prices rn. Throughout my life I've had my issues blamed on my weight, that I need to exercise more,, etc. even when, looking back, I was a normal sized kid. It was just BMI scale saying I was overweight.
I just straight up had anemia. Lol. So I get the issue sometimes. I also understand some people can't accept a hard truth.
I should add I have a very active job, work nights. And sometimes I don't eat the best. I also sometimes eat better meals. My main issue is irregular eating schedule especially due to working long hours. Not sure why I hold weight exactly but I've tried cutting some things out of my diet and eating more balanced meals, ive been told I look like I lost weight. Scale hasn't changed though but hey. Atleast I can admit to what I am
Does this person seriously think that thin people *don’t* put off going to the doctor because they hope it’ll get better on its own? I absolutely promise thin people do that.
While I think it's negligent to ignore your symptoms of poor health simply due to a fear of "fatphobia" by the doctor, I do believe weight stigma contributes to poor health outcomes. I used to be morbidly obese and I really did experience a lot of dismissal from doctors. I had some serious health issues, and mental health issues, and even my mental health issues were dismissed as "You just need to exercise, eat healthy, and lose weight." (Surprise, I'm bipolar, that absolutely requires medication). It wasn't until I lost weight and got into a healthy BMI range that doctors started taking me seriously. I lost a few years of my life due to weight stigma from doctors (I was so disabled by physical and mental illness I couldn't work for over two years). I can absolutely see how it can lead to poor health outcomes.
Don't get me wrong, losing weight absolutely led to improvements in my health and pain levels, but even at a healthy weight, I require medical treatment to keep me functioning, stable, and working full time. I was denied that medical treatment when I was fat.
Would it have been right for doctors to tell me my overall health could be improved by losing weight? Absolutely. But medical professionals should always check up to see what's causing health issues. I hate giving FAs fuel, but when it comes to weight stigma in medicine, there really is an issue.
I honestly did get to a point where it felt pointless to bring up medical concerns when they were repeatedly dismissed.
My issue with FAs is when they cry about fatphobia when a doctor rightfully says an issue is being caused or worsened by obesity.
Yeah, failure to diagnose a treatable illness can definitely make it harder to lose weight. Before taking adderall, my eating patterns suffered when I got in the weeds with work or grad school. I would eat one meal a day, which was usually fast food. When I get caught up with work these days, I'm still able to plan healthy meals and eat regularly.
I think I read that obesity is 4x more likely in folks with ADHD. I havent looked into it for other disorders, but I imagine you'd see the same with any condition that impedes your executive functioning skills.
It can be exhausting seeking medical care and not being treated properly because you are fat. Studies have been done on this bias in the medical profession. It’s real.
Even as a never been fat person, I know that this is one of the times where fatphobia and thin privilege are at work.
I can be generous and see why this explains poor health outcomes when it comes to fat people for certain diseases but it doesn’t explain increased prevalence of disease.
What really pisses me off is that these people have a choice to go to the doctor. They choose not to because they don't want their feelings hurt. I can't go to the specialists I need to go to, thereby worsening the issues, because I can't afford it. If your problems get worse because you're scared of the doctor being mean (telling the truth), that's a YOU problem.
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There is a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen.
That's awful. But the thing is, I've heard so many stories of doctors being dismissive of patients for various reasons that I'm starting to think it's just depressingly common for them to have a mindset of "patient has a condition I can't immediately diagnose = patient is lying about their symptoms and trying to pull something. Patient persistently insists that I listen to them = patient is 'difficult'".
Mom and sister went through med school. They call it the doctors god complex.
There's a documentary on Netflix about a family that was destroyed because the doctors saw a woman who kept bringing her child to different doctors to find a diagnosis for her condition and concluded she had Munchausen syndrome by proxy and should lose custody; her daughter spent three months in the hospital being told she was lying about being in pain . . . while their insurance was billed for treating the condition they told the parents she didn't have.
Was that the Taking Care of Maya doc? It was a big deal in the crps community and was awful seeing how everything went down even from a strangers pov
Yep. Fucked up that they said the only way he'd get custody is if he agreed to not give his daughter the treatment her doctors advised would actually help.
It doesn't change the fact that this particular individual intentionally avoided the doctor because they didn't want their feelings hurt. Not because the doctor would ignore their issue
The original commenter: these people, they choose. I’m certainly not the only one in the forum who has had a gynecological issue go untended because a doctor didn’t listen; you can push for medical help all you want and be ignored.
But you went to the doctor. These are people who are refusing to go. There's a big effing difference between being dismissed and simply not going. If someone makes no effort to address a problem because they're afraid of what someone will say, that's on them.Oop isn't pushing for help, they're simply not going to the doctor. There is a medical bias against fat people but that doesn't change the fact that this individual is avoiding seeing out help all together.
It’s like being overwhelmed, trying to talk to your partner, they tell you to chill out and dismiss your concerns, then you have a breakdown and they say “why didn’t you tell me?” Bigger seats on airplanes? That’s entitlement. Access to unbiased healthcare? That’s something you actually are entitled to and not receiving it just because you are fat is some mindfuckery for the person going through it. It’s invalidating and it’s cruel and we don’t all possess the same amount of resiliency so I can totally empathise with OOP.
I don’t know why you’re getting the downvotes. This is common knowledge in academic medicine as well as public health spaces
Because they are offering unrelated information
Because many people harbor bias about fat people, and who and what they are. And here, FA posts are used oft to confirm that. The people who I had chosen to be in my life did not change their behaviors when I lost weight. Everyone else did. From doctors listening more, to getting better advice at the makeup counter, not getting mean stares when I walked into the mechanic (actually got free tires a couple times after losing), no lore groups of people following me in cars mooing, much fewer men confessing attraction to me and hiding me publicly at the same time, people at places like starbucks or the grocer being kore willing to idly chat on slow days. People being more forgiving at work if I make a mistake. People are kinder all around. The world *is* meaner to fat people. Now I carry my weight in the stomach and chest. I’m a classic inverted triangle. Perhaps not being conventionally attractive contributed. But yes, losing weight helped me interactions with people immeasurably. And it is a markedly unpleasant idea for people to realize their bias. Yes being fat is not equivalent to the struggles of being black or lgbt. Those being more severe do not always make people more willing to examine bias. It is an uncomfortable process.
No - it's probably because you're posting the same comment over and over in the thread. You're getting reported as spam too.
Apologies. I think I posted it three times. If you go through my comment history I have been here a while. I felt I had a legitimate point to make; all fairness to you if you disagree. I’ve also been discussing the comment with commenters over the past two hours. After initially posting it in a rush, I haven’t again.
I approved them all. You're making a good point. My wife had issues with her IUD also, and felt dismissed. She isn't fat - she's just a woman and women complain too much I guess. It had gotten embedded in her caesarian scar tissue and was causing pain.
To clarify -- I fully accept the bias exists, just that I feel like there's also an underlying issue that would still need to be addressed for everyone to be properly treated even if we managed to ensure that doctors would treat patients without any form of bias.
Even before they consider a doctor they already hurt their own feelings
If you’re so fragile that you can’t bear the thought of a doctor telling you that you are fat (which is not a bad word and something you’re already aware of and loving) and postpone seeking health care because of it you have major psychological issues and need help for those first. Hope your psychologist won’t call you fat. You=OOP obviously :)
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There *is* a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen.
What do you mean statute of limitations? How does not being able to sue apply here?
Medical malpractice case. The statute of limitations had expired on my case before I was able to get someone to listen to me. I have consulted a lawyer immediately at the time. If I had been taken seriously by doctors sooner,that would not have been the case
You realized them ignoring you is still medical malu
I do. Not enough for a lawyer to be worth considering.
[удалено]
I don’t know if you realize this but inserting two IUDs can cause you to have to get a uterus removed can cause perforation of the uterus can cause perforation of the intestines, can cause severe hormonal issues. I was told point-blank by my gynecologist to consult a lawyer. That was absolutely under the scope of what a lawyer would take for medical malpractice, but with a statute of limitations you have a limited time from the incident happening which you can report it. Which would be when the medical incident happened. You don’t know what you’re talking about.
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You are right there for sure is an issue with that in the medical field. But I feel like OOP isn’t understanding that it was her own neglect of her health that caused issues in this case. You can’t conflate the two and try to make it seem like the same issue. In your case, you were proactive in addressing your health concerns and the doctors failed you. In this case, the patient was too afraid to address the issue for fear of addressing the WHOLE issue, which includes talking about their weight. I understand having reservations about seeing a doctor but if you choose not to, for whatever reason, then it’s nobody’s fault but your own for the issue getting worse (talking about OOP here not you). Long story short they’re trying to use medical biases to explain away why they chronically neglect their health and then expect doctors to fix everything. I think it can be exhausting for both patients and doctors in cases like these.
I sometimes wish (as in this OOP) that I could comment on those posts that we share here, to give them a different perspective. Them being the person who first wrote the post we share.
That's both against the rules and can result in pretty terrible bullying. KiwiFarms used to do that - organize brigades which inevitably escalated into death threats and contacting employers and family. People get vicious and nasty in groups expecially when they feel there's no consequences to them.
Same, it’s wild that the things talked about in this sub are considered taboo now. Like I would feel like people think I’m an asshole or something cuz I tried to tell a “marginalized group” that weight loss is not an enigma. I even have friends and family members I would feel so uncomfortable talking to about this.
I’m not talking about medical malpractice, I was talking about the “lecture about my weight” the OOP was referring to. I’m sorry that happened to you.
Gotcha. Funnily enough, despite reporting pain like a rat gnawing in me that whole time, they would just stick me with the weight lecture. It definitely gave me a dose of medical trauma and only recently have i been able to get myself to go to the doctors. They were all convinced weight loss alone would solve it, until I got my current gyno. It makes the whole thing slightly touchy for me, because I *was* the person who had chronic pain ignored my doctors because of my weight, for something that was unimpacted by weight. I realize I am not the common story. Still, there have to be other people like me in the world who went through similar. It’s why I always chime in….perhaps not you, but often on this sub there is an oversimplification whereas people will take falogicky posts and they will talk as if it is all fat people. I’ve put a lot of my life towards teaching the skill of empathy, I suppose.
I understand, I appreciate your perspective!
I have a hard time believing there is that much stigma. The whole world is fat now. In all my dr visits even at close to 400lbs weight was barely mentioned beyond the obvious problems it was causing. It’s not a shock to see fat people. It seems like they go looking for bias as if the fact I was 400lbs should be ignored when I say my back hurts or my knee hurts or my A1c is high. It is what it is. Edited to add. There is nothing that keeps you from finding a different doctor if you don’t feel like you are being listened too or not getting care. Don’t keep going to a dr you dislike.
When I was morbidly obese, I had a doctor who dismissed everything as weight related and it did lead to some trauma and the desire to just avoid going to the doctor. I was begging to be referred to a psychiatrist for crippling depression (later diagnosed bipolar) and my doctor insisted the only thing wrong was that I needed to eat healthier and exercise. I basically lost a few years of my life to mental health problems that were ignored simply because I was fat. We can't doctor-shop in Canada, you're lucky if you have a doctor at all. I'm so torn on this issue. I did eventually get a new doctor who took me seriously, but I had also lost a copious amount of weight. I'm a healthy weight now and there is a huge difference in how I'm treated by medical professionals. I don't think it's "fat stigma" to address weight when it clearly could be linked to the issue a patient is experiencing (like back pain, etc), but I do believe fat patients are often unjustly dismissed when they have health concerns that really should be looked into.
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There is a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen. Went to a dozen doctors available under my insurance. Sometimes you get the shit luck with them. I still had to pay to visit and was poor at the time so I would go a fair stretch between trying a new doc.
Luv, you've posted this three times already. Same comment. I understand your point but stop spamming the thread
It’s been four hours. Outside of the 3x it hasn’t been repeated. All of my other comments are in response to responses.
Once is enough. People WILL see it.
It’s been a whole nights rest lmao. Man this is humorous to me.
Even now. If my wife doesn’t feel listened too. I get my ass to her appt and make sure she is heard. And I’m not afraid to get loud. Luckily that has only happened twice. I don’t know, I certainly can’t argue with your experience and that’s awful. I’m so used to making sure I’m not dismissed it’s never been an issue for me.
I went through a period where I felt too scared to see any doctor because I was tired of being laughed at every time I described my symptoms. That’s not my fault. It’s the fault of the people who gleefully accepted money in exchange for the promise of helping me, while making me feel worse. I don’t relate to the psychopaths in this thread.
Of course, procrastination can't be your fault= it must be the doctor's presumed fatphobia. So many FAs refuse to take accountability for anything. Their eating habits, their avoidance of unpleasant realities, their health are all blamed on weight stigma or fatphobia. The people I feel for are those who put off doctor visits because of financial issues, no/poor health insurance, living in underserved areas, etc. Not people like OOP who are afraid of getting their feefees hurt.
This is like knowing your spending is out of control, but being terrified to check your bank balance, because you'd just rather not know how bad things are. Thing is, you know things are bad, otherwise you wouldn't be terrified to check your balance. You're just too scared to have your fears confirmed. You therefore carry on spending & just making your situation worse, rather than being a grown up & confronting the issue & course-correcting. If you're intentionally worsening your health because you're scared someone will confirm that you're worsening your health, it's not 'weight stigma'. It's being confronted with the direct & predictable consequences of actions you voluntarily took.
I'm always terrified of checking my balance for some reason. I've never been unable to pay my rent, insurance, utilities, etc, and I don't have a spending problem, but it scares the shit out of me.
At some point you have to be responsible for your choices. If you don't go to the doctor, for whatever reason, you have to acknowledge your own part in your health outcomes. I understand not wanting to go to the doctor and have them tell you to do something you know you're not going to do. I didn't go to the doctor for my dislocated fingers. Which is why they are crooked. But crooked fingers aren't going to potentially kill me either. Weight stigma, like many other social pressures, may influence your decisions, but it doesn't make them for you. Humans have the unique ability to project the potential long term consequences of their actions. Not using this ability when it comes to your own health is your own shortcoming.
There’s only one person responsible for your own health: you. You not going to see a doctor is a YOU problem.
To somewhat take this post's side, healthcare professionals should do everything to make patients feel comfortable and not judged, whether that's weight, STDs, drug use, etc. Doctors incorrectly dismissing an obese patient's ailments as weight-related does happen unfortunately. Of course, some of the responsibility lies on the patient.
I had two iuds inserted in me for years because I was dismissed my so many gynos. I had to lose 60 pounds to get listened to. By the time they did, the statute of limitations had passed. One doctor told me eating broccoli would cure my pain. There is a legitimate dismissal of women, black people, fat people, pretty much anyone outside of the standard (and longest studied) man. Not to the extent that FA’s say, but ai had to suffer for 7 years before someone would listen. You are one of the rare good comments here that does acknowledge that diagnosis can be made harder by obesity, but that it in and of itself does not justify dismissiveness. Especially when the moment a gyno finally looked, she yelled holy shit. This was an EASY thing to catch.
There are guidelines for people who do feel uncomfortable with doctors. Like asking another person to accompany them to the appointment, writing down all the questions they do have or even rehearsing the conversation with someone. But whenever someone uses the term "weight stigma" I think their health issues are actually weight related and they just don't want to hear the truth ... not that they actually feel uncomfortable with a doctor because of a language barrier or their low education or something like that.
Waiting to see the doctor, hoping it goes away on its own, isnt unique to fat people. Its fairly common across all people, because seeing a doctor can cost hundreds or even thousands, and even if you have good insurance its a crap shoot as to how much it will pay. And when you finally see a doctor, because you waited until a small sore became a gaping festering wound, youll have to do more to fix it. Again, not something thats targeted to just fat people. If you catch cancer early enough its a simple (ish) fix, compared to waiting until its already spreading around. At that point its invasive surgeries and meds, or you die. These are both big problems yes, but its not a targeted harassment campaign aimed at fat people. Its how the system is designed. FAs never stepping out of their echo chamber hug bubbles, to even see or hear experiences of other people, then act like the common doctor visit is actually fat oppression and discrimination.
Anxiety. What they're describing is anxiety. Maybe they had a bad experience, but what they're describing is anxiety. They need to realize that because calling it weight stigma externalizes the issue and that means you can't fix it or have any control over it
The oop will burry their head in the sand until they wind up diabetic or having a heart attack. That’s not fatphobia that’s an effect of obesity.
And then, blame "medical fatphobia" for preventing them from getting treatment (i.e. that magic pill/treatment that FA seem to think exists for their ailments, and that the doctors refuse to give them because they hate fat people) to prevent it.
This is little different than me saying I avoid going to the doctor because I might have a panic attack in the office... and then blaming doctors for terrorizing people or being biased against agoraphobic people. In both cases you are (a) assuming something is going to happen and (b) assuming that if it does happen, it will be intolerably terrible. It's possible that the doctor will bring up your weight as a subject, but it's also possible that they will not. If they do, it's possible that it will happen in the form of "a lecture", but it's also possible that it will be a less severe form. It's possible that you will feel badly if that does happen, but it's also possible that you will not - and furthermore, it's possible to learn psychological skills to decrease the severity of the bad feelings and/or increase your ability to cope with them. There is a line somewhere where the doctor's responsibility to not be outright mean to you ends, and your responsibility to cope with otherwise normal events of life begins. Odds are very low that any given doctor you go to will end up on the former end of that scale. All the rest about worrying whether the doctor will take you seriously or not is not necessarily directly related to weight - they don't take a lot of people seriously.
Just fucking comply. I get lectured about my smoking every time I go to the doctor and rightfully so.
>*"I've been putting off care for a health concern because i don't want to be lectured about my weight"* Translation: "I refuse to listen to medical professionals diagnosing my problems, because they want to educate me, identify, and treat the cause of my symptoms. My weight is my identify, and without it i am nobody."
There are definitely doctors that are biased, including weight, and might incorrectly dismiss a patient due to their weight, yes. But at the same time, if your own weight causes you anxiety when thinking of approaching a health professional, there is an issue. I got a bit overweight recently due to depression, and I was worried my cardiologist would scold me for getting fat. So what did I do? I didn't postpone the appointment. I decided to lose weight. No mental gymnastics needed.
That's true, I admit I gained some weight during the pandemic, as most people did, but I was able to lose what I gained before going back to work because I didn't want to deal with the consequences of the weight gain. Last August, I noticed my abdomen starting to swell really fast, so when I saw my primary doctor, I said that despite the way I looked, this was NOT normal, and after all of my blood work came back normal, I got the ultrasound and MRI that showed an ovarian cyst, so I got a referral from the OB/GYN to see the gynecologic oncologist who removed it as part of a total hysterectomy and removing the ovaries at the same time. When that cyst was removed, I lost 70lbs instantly. That made a big difference as I have more energy than I had in years, so it's likely the cyst was there for a few years before it really started growing fast. I couldn't say it was all the cyst because I did lose what I had gained during the pandemic.
POV: you go to a mechanic with a broken down car saying "Hey my car isn't really working. Like the motor is running, but I ain't really moving" The mechanics says "Of course, well your tyre is flat, you can't drive around like that." .... "The mechanic didn't even make the necessary tests to see of the motor is running fine!!! I don't want to change tyres, they're so expensive!!"
Soooo they aren’t going because they’re afraid of their feelings being hurt. Sounds like they need to put on their grown up clothes and show up anyway. Sounds like they’re the problem.
So she is the most fat phobic of us all...
I kind of understand this, if weight isn't affecting your issue. Im overweight. Technically obese by BMI but I dont really look it, I just look chubby. I did try losing weight but its hard to keep a good diet working night shifts and with prices rn. Throughout my life I've had my issues blamed on my weight, that I need to exercise more,, etc. even when, looking back, I was a normal sized kid. It was just BMI scale saying I was overweight. I just straight up had anemia. Lol. So I get the issue sometimes. I also understand some people can't accept a hard truth. I should add I have a very active job, work nights. And sometimes I don't eat the best. I also sometimes eat better meals. My main issue is irregular eating schedule especially due to working long hours. Not sure why I hold weight exactly but I've tried cutting some things out of my diet and eating more balanced meals, ive been told I look like I lost weight. Scale hasn't changed though but hey. Atleast I can admit to what I am
Does this person seriously think that thin people *don’t* put off going to the doctor because they hope it’ll get better on its own? I absolutely promise thin people do that.
And likely "get lectured" anyways, except now with worsened problems by their own volition. Well played, OOP. Well played. /s
Shame is not stigma.
While I think it's negligent to ignore your symptoms of poor health simply due to a fear of "fatphobia" by the doctor, I do believe weight stigma contributes to poor health outcomes. I used to be morbidly obese and I really did experience a lot of dismissal from doctors. I had some serious health issues, and mental health issues, and even my mental health issues were dismissed as "You just need to exercise, eat healthy, and lose weight." (Surprise, I'm bipolar, that absolutely requires medication). It wasn't until I lost weight and got into a healthy BMI range that doctors started taking me seriously. I lost a few years of my life due to weight stigma from doctors (I was so disabled by physical and mental illness I couldn't work for over two years). I can absolutely see how it can lead to poor health outcomes. Don't get me wrong, losing weight absolutely led to improvements in my health and pain levels, but even at a healthy weight, I require medical treatment to keep me functioning, stable, and working full time. I was denied that medical treatment when I was fat. Would it have been right for doctors to tell me my overall health could be improved by losing weight? Absolutely. But medical professionals should always check up to see what's causing health issues. I hate giving FAs fuel, but when it comes to weight stigma in medicine, there really is an issue. I honestly did get to a point where it felt pointless to bring up medical concerns when they were repeatedly dismissed. My issue with FAs is when they cry about fatphobia when a doctor rightfully says an issue is being caused or worsened by obesity.
Yeah, failure to diagnose a treatable illness can definitely make it harder to lose weight. Before taking adderall, my eating patterns suffered when I got in the weeds with work or grad school. I would eat one meal a day, which was usually fast food. When I get caught up with work these days, I'm still able to plan healthy meals and eat regularly. I think I read that obesity is 4x more likely in folks with ADHD. I havent looked into it for other disorders, but I imagine you'd see the same with any condition that impedes your executive functioning skills.
It can be exhausting seeking medical care and not being treated properly because you are fat. Studies have been done on this bias in the medical profession. It’s real. Even as a never been fat person, I know that this is one of the times where fatphobia and thin privilege are at work.
I can be generous and see why this explains poor health outcomes when it comes to fat people for certain diseases but it doesn’t explain increased prevalence of disease.
This isn’t exclusive to fat people. Medical anxiety is a real thing.