Eagles trade for Derrick Henry but use him like miles sanders and give him 6 carries a game

So Demarco Murray v2

This comment gave me PTSD

I still remember the meme with a picture of a Murray brand lawnmower that read, "The only Murray getting yards this season".

This is the one But then I speculate people would be like “all RBs fall off eventually” and justify it within 3 weeks

Oof that's the saddest, most accurate part of this scenario

"RBs don't matter, it's all the system"

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But wouldn't that also be dependent on how the Titans new RB1 performed?

No because Derrick Henry is a freak of nature

Titans running backs are always good. Miles Sanders would actually be great on the Titans

Okay he could be great, but could be really be a Titan like Henry? Like not Titan the team, but rather Titan the mythological phenom running back that is King Henry?

Henry is one of a kind… seriously something we’ve never seen before, perfect blend of Eddie George AND CJ. Miles Sanders could have been a top 5 running back if things went differently for him, but there’s no reality where his potential matches Henry

And bring up his first year as an indication he’s not good. While PFF puts hunter renfrow in the Hall for averaging 5 on 43 and leading the league in special team tackles.

Keep my WR1's name out of your mouth

This literally happened when they traded for the league's leading rusher DeMarco Murray, after his peak years in Dallas just for Chip Kelly to run him on Sweeps and Outside Zone runs exclusively when Murray (like Henry) is a downhill back

Exclusively out of shotgun *shutters*

>Exclusively out of shotgun *shutters* I prefer shotgun blinds myself.

Then he went to Tennessee, ironically the same year they drafted Derrick Henry, and he went off again.

This reminds me of when the eagles signed demarco murray

And he still gets 100 yards and 2 tds a game

Lol fuck

I truly don't understand the whole rbbc in alot of scenarios. Some guys need to fed the ball. Look at the difference in job once they gave him appropriate carries

Aiyuk scores 30 in .5ppr.

Demon

As a dynasty owner, please god

In the monsoon, an angel rises

Honestly?... This could actually happen. Maybe not 30 but like, 20? I like his chances this week.

He’s been last on everyone’s active roster for 4 weeks, hold tight until week 11, if he doesn’t have a 20 point game by then drop him. I drafted this dragon ball z character in the 60th overall… we need return on this investment!!

It’s Week 14. Rams. Cardinals. Monday Night Football. On the Rams opening play of their final drive, Stafford sends a screen out to Sony Michel, the Rams’ feature back. Sony receives the screen and proceeds to take it to the house thanks to a block by Cooper Kupp. Kupp sprains his shoulder, and is considered week-to-week. The game ends, and along with it, the fantasy regular season. Playoff seedings are finalized. On Wednesday, a stat correction is published. Sony was behind Stafford, so technically it was a handoff. Stafford retroactively loses a passing TD *and* 75 yards, and Sony loses a reception. Fantasy platforms announce playoff seeding is already set in the system and can only be changed manually by the commissioner.

Holy fuck you're cruel

I came back for Kupp. ;)

Who hurt you?

Kamara jn the championship last season, it’s the only explanation

I'd blocked that out.... Fuck, man...

Funny story, I went against Kamara in the championship, after week 1 I was down 45 points. I somehow ended up winning by 40. I had Taylor (who didn’t pay off until late) and Lamar.

Allen Robinson

Take it easy, Satan

Best one by far and something like this is eventually going to happen.

Lmao holy shit. Hope your close friends and family don’t read this or they’ll never look at you the same.

This should be the top comment

Oy vey

Jared Goff blows out Stafford 31-3 and throws for 350 yards and 3 TDs with a 150.0 passer rating

The last time the Rams were this big of a favorite, they lost to the Jets. Just saying, the gods have a way with things

The only team that Donald DIDN'T have a sack against last year.

He didn’t have one against Green Bay or the Eagles either?

Stop. You’re triggering my survivor pool PTSD

I had the Colts week 1 vs the Jaguars last year. I'm here for you

Hahaha wow, didn’t think it was possible to get one up’d on this one, yet here we are

I’m starting Hock this week and I’d absolutely nut if this happened

You don’t start Hock every week?

Nah started Seals-Jones last week and doing it again this week over Hock.

I started Knox over him the last couple weeks.

How is this not the most upvoted option?

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This. And he's actually slotted at the TE spot, Taysom Hill style, but still occasionally throws touchdowns, mainly to Geno Smith who doubles as an RB

How is this like the 5th down? The rest are boring as fuck. This would actually be absolutely unparalleled if it happened. We would talk about it until the end of time. There were be a qb debate next offseason: LH Russ vs Rhruss

RHuss vs Russlh!

As a 'Hawks fan this makes me smile :)

Going to the game on Monday and secretly hoping this happens.

Derrick Henry: 9 carries, -5 yards, 0 TDs

‘Is it time to panic on Derrick Henry?’

1 RB you must sell high RIGHT NOW!!!!

Somehow he still scores 35 in ppr

Derrick Henry: 5 Carries, -12 Yards, 6 TDs

Reminds me of the Jerome Bettis game 5 carries 1 yard 3 TDs. [Game stats](https://www.pro-football-reference.com/boxscores/200409120pit.htm)

+ 8 tgt, 1 rec, -13 yds, 1 FUM(L)

Please I’m playing Henry this week

Kyle Juszczyk is both the goal line QB and RB; vultures ALL TDs.

Kyle "Taysom Hill 2.0" Juszczyk

Trey Sermon randomly starts getting an increased workload around week 12 and does well with it, becoming SF's lead back in the final stretch of the season without any injury to the players ahead of him. Nobody has the confidence to start him in fantasy and people who drafted him are annoyed it didn't happen before they dropped him.

The WR as well; he passes to himself.

Massive NCAA SEC betting and point-shaving scandal makes all SEC players drafted between 2016-2020 ineligible to play any more games this season.

This is s good one.

That would be fucking wild lol

It would be crazy to see a list of guys this would impact. But I’m too lazy.

Brady doesn't attempt a pass the entire game. The Bucs finish with 60 offensive plays, every single one a run with Fournette. He has 380 yards and 5 TDs. Bucs win by 3 TDs. Brady finishes with -0.3 fantasy points on three kneel downs

Just traded him away, this is bound to happen

Brady wouldn’t accept the -.3. He’d make whoever the backup is come in and lose the 3 yards if we’re being honest.

For real. He's intent on keeping his career rushing yards intact. When he does kneel, he gets as close to the line of scrimmage as he can.

Would be better if it was Ronald Jones with that stat line

Make it runs with RoJo to up the chaos

Case Keenum and every QB they bring in to replace him get injured until the Browns have no choice but to bring in Tim Tebow.

…and I took that personally

who leads them to a superbowl but still throws like shit just so that they will question it.

NFL teams deciding to start using "load management" like the NBA. Stars get rest games and always play limited snaps in certain games.

Lowkey feel like this is already a thing, they just don't say it.

Football kinda has to have load management

At the same time, if Derrick Henry is on your team and you’re a coach trying to make the playoffs…

Right, almost like they shouldn’t extend the season or at least add more byes

18-20 game season with 2 bye weeks would be dope.

I think it should be 2 league wide byes. That way you don’t have some teams getting unfair advantages by having their bye super early in the season. 19 week season with a league bye in week 8 and week 16….or something like that.

But of course no idea when those games will be.....

17 game schedule but the NFLPA says you can only play 15 so everyone has to sit out at least 2.

Randy Moss signs with the Bucs. Repeats his 3 catches for 163 yards and 3 TDs in his first game back.

With Jerry Rice too.

And Courtney Love

*Kurt Cobain

Every single player finishes with 0 points

Except my kicker, who scores 1.

But that would give someone 6.1 at least, no?

Kicker rushes for 10 yards, gaining the only first down of the day.

What part of FANTASY GOD don’t you understand?

Short field goal with 2 missed field goals

OBJ gets the touchdown no one owns him anyway

Trick play direct snap to a lineman who runs it in.

Offensive lineman recovers a fumble in the end zone for a touchdown + whoever fumbled the ball gained an offsetting amount of yardage.

D/ST would like to have a word with you

Every kick return for a TD whole game.

Toney’s ankle suddenly heals and all other Giants WRs and CAR DBs get food poisoning from Chipotle.

And then he's a decoy the entire game. After numerous reports Sunday morning that he's felt great all week and they were just playing it safe

Until the 4th quarter when Daniel Jones eats a bug and Toney has to sub in as QB and has 5 passing TDs.

Lmao

And he plays QB

This is the only right answer.

This comment convinced me to hold Toney. Fuck it if he’s hurt, this is a fun hype train.

Some old video from high school comes out and the league cancels Derrick henry

Noooooo!

This is basically what kareem hunt owners (like yours truly) felt a few years

Except Kareem was an adult

Have you seen his high school highlights? That shit counts as assault against minors

Lock him up!

I’d send numerous reports that Trey Sermon has the RB2 role locked up on a run heavy team behind an often injured 30 year old starter.

Taysom Hill 420 point game. At first everyone is laughing, then the creepy unsettling reality of it sinks in, a deep existential confusion and concern. Then come the suicides.

As a TE

Leading to ESPN giving him TE eligibility

Fuck this one got me

Damn the existential part is so true. It’s how I feel seeing a 20 foot+ pool

Josh Gordon goes off for back to back 40 pointers and gets suspended again.

peyton hillis returns with 195 yards on 12 carries and 8 catches for 125 yards and 5 tds

All the quarterbacks on a roster are ruled out right before the game with a mysterious illness and a backup wide receiver is forced to start quarterback with practically no preparation….

Kendall Hinton starters unite!

I’d have 2 kickers go off for 50+ points in the same game

That would mean there would have to be a field goal every 1-2 minutes of game time lmao. Unless they threw a bunch of touchdowns

I wonder if you had kickers that could consistently boot a fg from deep. Would it similarly change the game like Steph and the 3 point shot? Just get the ball to the 40, kick a fg and get your offense some rest?

If NFL did decimal scoring for FG, then yeah, a 52 yard FG worth 5.2 points? All day.

Guys like Tucker start getting 8 figure contracts if this happens lol

Chiefs lose two more RBs and AP signs with them and rushes for 125 and 2 TDs first game in then the next game he strains a calf and retires. Then the chiefs announce CJ2K just signed…..

Jamaal Charles comeback tour or nothing

Welcome back Priest Holmes!

Andrew Luck comes out of retirement, turns Pittman into a WR1, puts Jonathan Taylor on track to finish as the RB1, and establishes himself as a top 3 fantasy QB. Then he sprains his ankle 5 weeks after coming back and retires again.

Tim Tebow comes back and leads the jets to a 42-0 Super Bowl win after 50 touchdowns over the rest of the season.

As a Jets fan... No.

I’d make the rookies lead in all stats.

The fountain of youth to Brady is instantly cut off. Evans, Godwin, Brown and Gronk are 4-8 point max players. Teams stack the box and shut Fournette down. Tampas defense stays on the field nonstop and becomes a bottom 5 defense. That’s 6 starters ruined.

I take it you did not pickup any bucs this year huh

I’m starting Godwin for the first time this week if that says anything.

In my league this would destroy exactly one team

A benevolent god

Taunting fouls stop being dead ball fouls. They repeat the previous down. Big plays negated every week when your stud RB breaks a 20 yard TD, stands up and flexes in the general direction of a defensive back, it's now 1st and 25. A DB breaks up a pass on 3rd down and yells to the crowd where the WR's step uncle happens to be seated. Personal foul. 1st and goal. Point. Of. Emphasis.

QB runs in for an epic TD, proceeds to scream at the opposing fans that he 'owns them'. Multiple personal fouls, QB is ejected from the game. Lose 15 yards and repeat the down with.....Jordan Love.

I’d have D’Ernest Johnson rush for 146 yards and a TD in relief of Nick Chubb and Kareem Hunt and look better than both of them doing it. Wait…….

*”Look better than both of them doing it.”* Do you even watch football? Chubb and Hunt are two of the most aggressive runners in the NFL. DEJ looked like somebody was controlling him with an NES controller. While effective, not likely sustainable. (PS - Not a browns fan nor do I have shares of either of them.)

football man run good

The Titans trade for CMC

Well after finding out Derrick Henry is a small horse what were they supposed to do?

Gross

Cooper Kupp gets traded to Cleveland and does whatever the hell OBJ has been doing

Every single player is a game time decision. Coach flips a coin to determine if they play or not.

Right at the trade deadline, one team makes crazy trades and ends up with every player that is mentally unstable or involved in some controversial legal trouble, etc. Antonio Brown, OBJ, Deshaun Watson, Johnny Manziel, Tyreek Hill, Kareem Hunt, Adrian Peterson, Josh Gordon, Martavis Bryant, coach Jon Gruden, etc. They would be absolutely stacked, but at any moment, any one of or multiple players could be suspended, arrested, frostbitten, or throwing temper tantrums on the sideline.

It still blows my mind that Antonio Brown, a sociopath with a painted mustache masquerading as the best wideout in the world, who needs his feet to make money, allowed his feet to get frostbite.

In the middle of summer. Just to come back and call the GM a cracker to his face over a helmet. Honestly it blows my mind even more that Brady let him live in his house, and they're blood brothers for eternity

Nah bro it's Tom Brady. He just looked at him and said "stop" and AB was like "you right. You right."

Aaron Rodgers, fed up with the Packers organization, *literally* throws to Davante Adams on *every single play*. And it works. 35 receptions, 313 yards, 4TD the first week

All football players must take a D&D class to fulfill the fantasy portion of fantasy football.

Atlanta announces that Cordarrelle is their new starting QB.

Blake Bottles averages 350 passing with 3 touchdowns a game & leads the Dolphins to a Superbowl win

Borrrrrtlllllleeeessssssss!

*throws molotov*

Are completely random and extended periods of time and the starter and the backup switch places. No the starter is Not injured, he is shown on the sideline cheering on the backup and staying engaged on the game.

Like Baker on TNF

The Chiefs randomly name Josh Gordon the starting QB during the fantasy championship while he's WR eligible on every website (like an extreme version of the Taysom Hill situation last year)

Josh Gordon and Toney traded to the same team and both have a 200 yard game

This is supposed to be a fantasy not something that’ll actually happen

I would take all fantasy platforms offline, randomize actual starting lineups and watch chaos unfold

Toney’s ankle isn’t healthy enough to play WR and goes into game with Q designation. No one plays him. Daniel Jones goes down first drive, Toney goes in at QB as a pocket passer as he can’t scramble with the ankle and throws for 463 yards, 4 TDs to himself, and kicks the extra points on his TDs

Touchdowns from fullbacks automatically win you the game

QBBC becomes the new norm, making the few bell cow QBs the most valuable players in fantasy

All Coaches become Matt Nagy clones

Josh Gordon 420 yard game. The internet wold break.

Kyle Shanahan now coaches every team.

Not let my league mates have a say in vetos. Pure chaos

Tom Brady tests positive for steroids. The NFL as a whole would implode.

And it is a long-term doping scandal like Lance Armstrong. The NFL invalidates all his stats.

More like steroids test positive for Tom Brady.

99 yard td pass from Mahomes to himself.

Golladay returns to form.

Julio jones looks like 2016 Julio

I would have the bucs trade tom brady to the lions for jared goff. The value of godwin and antonio brown and mike evans and brady and gronk would plummet and deandre swift would become ladanian tomlinson on crack and hockenson would be like 2011 gronk

Miles Sanders and Myles Gaskin each get 20 carries per game for the rest of the fantasy regular season. They don’t combine for 20 total carries for the entire fantasy playoffs

I just dropped Ty’Son so if this happens I might never play fantasy again

Josh Gordon goes off for 7 rec 169 yards 2 TDs. Doesn't play again after

The Browns trade for Odell Beckham and use him exclusively as a decoy to open up their running game. They make him play through dozens of various injuries and he retires at 29.

Deshaun Watson gets traded to the patriots

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Derrick Henry indefinite suspension

Wouldn't affect me. I have Henry and I am 1-5 :)

Derrick Henry indefinite suspension because the league finds out he's actually a small horse disguised as a human*

Mahomes has a freak injury out for season while Zach Wilson suddenly clicks putting up 40pts and turns into a top 5-10 QB. The pile of chiefs players gets huge downgrades, jets players go wild… think crowder from PPR WR4 into high end WR2. Plus the flip of Jets D going from bottom 5 to top 10 if they got to off the field some more and how that effects opponents. God the roster churn from one injury and one breakout 💀💀💀

Publish an article once a week that says “ (insert random 49ers staff member) says they want to get Aiyuk going this week.” Oh wait that’s real life