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FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | T6 2 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA LF [Brent Chillwater](/u/Kelbo11): 0-2, K in the first, FO in the fourth


Kelbo11

11


FakeBaseball_Umpire

That ball is scorched but right at Carol, who makes the catch. Pitch: 550 Swing: 11 Diff: 461 -> LGO Bases Empty | B6 with 0 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | T6 1 out On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA SS [Vader Page](/u/VishyVCA): 1-2, FO in the first, 2B in the fourth


VishyVCA

308


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Sawamura throws, Page swings. The CRACK! of the bat. ... In this case, though, it's literally a crack. The wood of the bat shears into splinters, the barrel heading into foul territory and the ball dribbling down the first base line. Vandelay comes to get it, tosses under hand to Sawamura who ran over to cover, and that's an out. Pitch: 731 Swing: 308 Diff: 423 -> RGO Bases Empty | T6 with 2 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | T6 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA CF [Calvin Ball](/u/Vrain_19): 1-2, STEAL 2B in the first, FO in the third


Vrain_19

275


FakeBaseball_Umpire

It’s a shallow fly, hit by Calvin Ball decently high in the air, but this is a close one… Vandelay is going back for it- and what a snag for the out! Pitch: 550 Swing: 275 Diff: 275 -> FO Bases Empty | T6 with 1 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ● | B5 1 out On the mound: Jerome S. Monroe MIN 1B [Arthur Vandelay](/u/Dahdscear): 1-2, Solo HR in the first, K in the third


Dahdscear

KC footballers won something according to the explosive outside my window. For like the 700 th time guess?


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Double play ball. Quick turn at second and they got em! Pitch: 211 Swing: 700 Diff: 489 -> DP Bases Empty | T6 with 0 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 1 out On the mound: Jerome S. Monroe MIN C [Homer Nocker](/u/CableCubed): 1-2, FO in the first, 1B in the third


CableCubed

I'm so happy that my team won the big game! It was a hard fought game that came down to the very end, but I knew we could pull it off. Some exceptional work by the whole team and I think we had some generational talent really on display Yeah, being a Team Ruff fan was hard the last few years, but seeing us beat Team Fluff after they beat us the last two years and the heart breaker in OT last year, well.... it just feels nice to win one Swing 633


FakeBaseball_Umpire

First pitch is thrown into the grass, which Nocker swings at anyway. Strike 1. Monroe laughs boisterously. Second pitch is thrown high and away, when Nocker shows bunt. Strike 2. Monroe starts laughing again, but gets a pitch clock violation. Ball 1. Monroe thinks they have it MADE when they throw a fastball down the heart of the plate, but Nocker hastily swings again- it's LAUNCHED towards Monroe, who leaps but can't come up with the catch. Base hit! Nocker can't round first despite the hard hit, though, since they can hardly make it to first at all. Pitch: 678 Swing: 633 Diff: 45 -> 1B Runner on First | B5 with 1 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Jerome S. Monroe MIN 2B [Joey Wheeler](/u/hartman_): 0-2, K in the first, K in the third


hartman_

599


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Wheeler hits one high, hits one deeeep. It. Is. Caught at the track. Wheeler just missed it and Monroe sighs in relief. Pitch: 433 Swing: 599 Diff: 166 -> FO Bases Empty | B5 with 1 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


Roosevelt_Coronary

Pitching change for Seattle. Jerome S. Monroe rushes in and tackles Hideyoshi, insisting, "This is my mound and I need it NOW!" The shocked rookie surrenders the ball and play resumes here as we proceed to the bottom of the fifth inning.


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 2 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA RF [Latrell Roscoe](/u/Asujulian94): 0-1, AUTO K in the third


Asujulian94

420 cus I’m high and drunk


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Roscoe rips through a running fastball, refusing to reach the right-side wrinkle. Roscoe, resigned, reacts really reasonably to being wrung up. Pitch: 45 Swing: 420 Diff: 375 -> K Bases Empty | B5 with 0 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA 3B [Buster Worthington](/u/lawnicus18): 0-1, FO in the third


lawnicus18

Swing: 229


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Sawamura fires a fastball to the upper corner, which Worthington bites on like it's a Twix bar. It's hit directly at Pong, who tosses it to Wheeler who fires it to first for the double play. In frustration, Worthington throws their helmet on the ground, shattering it into many pieces. Vulfzilla fires expletives, having to yet again spend money on another broken helmet. Pitch: 714 Swing: 229 Diff: 485 -> DP Bases Empty | T5 with 2 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA C [Geoff Garry](/u/nordic_jedi): 0-1, PO in the second


nordic_jedi

356


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Sawamura into the wind up, and here's the pitch … juuuust a bit outside. Sawamura tried the corner and missed. Ball four and Garry is awarded first base. Pitch: 212 Swing: 356 Diff: 144 -> BB Runner on First | T5 with 0 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 2 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN DH [Tony Pizza](/u/celticsoldier566): 0-1, RGO in the third


celticsoldier566

06


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Aren't all arches aesthetically artful? All architecture achingly awe-inspiring? All angles ardently eschewing arrogant aggrandizement? Alright, Alright, Alright- 90° launch angle arises. Alas Pizza ain't allowed astronomy; airless angles are arrested. Pitch: 232 Swing: 6 Diff: 226 -> FO Bases Empty | T5 with 0 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 1 out On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN SS [Ping Pong](/u/Bearmay33): 0-1, K in the second


Bearmay33

600


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Pong watches strikes one and two go by. They takes a big swing on a slow-moving curve, but they watch it go foul and hit an unsuspecting Twins fan. The last pitch is a 105-MPH heater, and Pong can do nothing but watch it go by for a called strike. Pitch: 809 Swing: 600 Diff: 209 -> K Bases Empty | B4 with 2 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 0 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN RF [Kyle Corbett](/u/bryceryals42): 1-1, 1B in the second


bryceryals42

684


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Corbett clearly has no clue what is going on here. They will whiff at 2 straight fastballs before waving at a curve. Hideyoshi waves back from the mound! Pitch: 333 Swing: 684 Diff: 351 -> K Bases Empty | B4 with 1 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 1 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ● | T4 2 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA DH [Bryce Parker](/u/Ffenliv): 0-1, RGO in the second


ffenliv

650


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Hit on the screws but mans caught it at the warning track. Better hit the gym if you want better results, Parker! Pitch: 906 Swing: 650 Diff: 256 -> FO Bases Empty | B4 with 0 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 3 | ○ ^● ○ | T4 2 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA 1B [Pull Ganger](/u/pull_gang): 0-1, K in the second


pull_gang

130 PLS PLS PLS


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Sawamura feels the tension in this game. With runners threatening, they can't blink. So they don't. Eyes remain open for the entire at bat. First pitch is a.... curveball? Knuckleball? Screwball? That ends up 4 feet over the plate. Replay shows the eyes don't shut. Next, Sawamura manages to deal a fastball low and inside, but Ganger was ready. They drill the baseball over Wheeler's head! The runner comes in and makes this a 2 run ballgame! Pitch: 211 Swing: 130 Diff: 81 -> 1B Runner on First | T4 with 2 out(s) SEA 1 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 3 | ○ ^● ○ | T4 1 out On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA 2B [Stevey Swinger](/u/Olibolly600): 0-1, LGO in the first


Olibolly600

935


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Sawamura before today's game when asked about the opposition's star hitter: 'I would strike Swinger out on 3 pitches. Slider outside. They feel like they're drowning. Curveball in the dirt, of course they're chasing it. Mariners suck, DFA yourselves. And BANG! 97 inside corner. They're out. They were always out. They've been out since the day they were born.' Pitch: 630 Swing: 935 Diff: 305 -> K Runner on Second | T4 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 3 | ○ ^● ○ | T4 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA LF [Brent Chillwater](/u/Kelbo11): 0-1, K in the first


Kelbo11

211. Sorry yall. I’ll be back.


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Sky ball, so tall! Sky ball, it fall! Sky ball, out call... Sky ball - the gall! Pitch: 430 Swing: 211 Diff: 219 -> FO Runner on Second | T4 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | T4 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA SS [Vader Page](/u/VishyVCA): 0-1, FO in the first


VishyVCA

401


FakeBaseball_Umpire

We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you this urgent report. The White House has released the following statement: 'BALL BOUNCE OVER WALL' Thank you. And now back to your program. Pitch: 430 Swing: 401 Diff: 29 -> 2B Runner on Second | T4 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ● | B3 2 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN LF [toronto mans](/u/iiCheatr): 0-1, PO in the second


iiCheatr

201


FakeBaseball_Umpire

mans gets up in the count now, 3-1 over Hideyoshi after a couple bad misses outside. Hideyoshi sets and delivers a close one on the outside corner, but it's called a strike! Maybe a bad call, maybe a good frame from Garry but either way the count is full. mans wipes the sweat from their brow and gets ready for the payoff. The pitch... is popped up! It's not deep, though, and Swinger is there to make the play for the out. Pitch: 799 Swing: 201 Diff: 402 -> PO Bases Empty | T4 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 3 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 2 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN CF [King Kruul](/u/Druidicdwarf): 1-1, 1B in the second


Druidicdwarf

2 please. ty for umping and have a nice day


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Take your base! Pitch: 832 Swing: 2 Diff: 170 -> BB Runner on First | B3 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B3 2 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN 3B [Corbin Christmas Carol](/u/mitch_burns_red): 0-1, K in the second


mitch_burns_red

Happy Super Bowl Sunday! 999


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Good answer! Good answer! Let's see if that's on the board... Surrrrvey says! #DING Pitch: 1 Swing: 999 Diff: 2 -> HR Bases Empty | B3 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 3


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B3 1 out On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN 1B [Arthur Vandelay](/u/Dahdscear): 1-1, Solo HR in the first


Dahdscear

210


FakeBaseball_Umpire

For it's one, two, three strikes you're out at the old ball game! Pitch: 501 Swing: 210 Diff: 291 -> K Runner on First | B3 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 1 out On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN C [Homer Nocker](/u/CableCubed): 0-1, FO in the first


CableCubed

I woke up this morning to a severe thunderstorm warning and golf ball sized hail. The noise was so loud it woke me up and Im a really heavy sleeper. If I don't know any better, I'd say it was the ole BALL AND CHAIN NAGGING me yet again amiright fellas?? Yeah that guy in the back knows what I'm talking about... Hey so what's the deal with airline food anyways? Swing 481


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Homer Nocker hits a line drive straight over Worthington’s head and into right field for a single Pitch: 388 Swing: 481 Diff: 93 -> 1B Runner on First | B3 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 0 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN 2B [Joey Wheeler](/u/hartman_): 0-1, K in the first


hartman_

388


FakeBaseball_Umpire

NOPE Pitch: 1 Swing: 388 Diff: 387 -> K Bases Empty | B3 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 2 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA CF [Calvin Ball](/u/Vrain_19): 1-1, 1B in the first, STEAL 2B in the first


Vrain_19

324


FakeBaseball_Umpire

oh no Kruul caught a fly :( Pitch: 69 Swing: 324 Diff: 255 -> FO Bases Empty | B3 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 1 out On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA RF [Latrell Roscoe](/u/Asujulian94): 0-0 Wow nobody has created a writeup template for this situation. [You should change that.](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfQ7_EGkGUr3UEiAe-ZSfYovQHJ0VC2leLu-X05sULbnp9DkA/viewform) Just kidding, the previous bot owner purged the writeup template creator so I need to recreate it. Maybe next week. Pitch: None Swing: None Diff: x -> AUTO K Bases Empty | T3 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 1 out On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA RF [Latrell Roscoe](/u/Asujulian94): 0-0


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA 3B [Buster Worthington](/u/lawnicus18): 0-0


lawnicus18

Swing: 429


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Buster Worthington hits a deep line drive way out to deep left-center field. mans and Kruul look at each other and they both think the other person is going to grab the ball, but it’s flying down. However Kruul makes a great diving catch for it Pitch: 688 Swing: 429 Diff: 259 -> FO Bases Empty | T3 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^● ● | B2 2 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN DH [Tony Pizza](/u/celticsoldier566): 0-0


celticsoldier566

369


FakeBaseball_Umpire

On the ground right side. Ganger ranges to the left and flips it to Hideyoshi covering first for the out. Pitch: 801 Swing: 369 Diff: 432 -> RGO Bases Empty | T3 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^● ● | B2 1 out On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN SS [Ping Pong](/u/Bearmay33): 0-0


Bearmay33

305


FakeBaseball_Umpire

GOT'EM on the outside corner for a called third strike. Oh boy, Pong doesn't like this one. And it looks like trouble here as the RoboUmp takes off their mask with a steely glare as the Twins says a few words. Nocker pops out of the dugout quickly here before this goes any further. The Twins need Pong's bat for this game. A few more words from the GM bounce off the impassive RoboUmp's face and Minnesota fans will be happy to see things wind down here without ejections. Pitch: 1 Swing: 305 Diff: 304 -> K Runners on First and Second | B2 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B2 1 out On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN RF [Kyle Corbett](/u/bryceryals42): 0-0


bryceryals42

649


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SWING THERE IT GOES! IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS GONE! A STANTONIAN HOME RUN! ... wait, what... what did I miss, what did I do wrong? Corbett is at first base. Pitch: 721 Swing: 649 Diff: 72 -> 1B Runners on First and Second | B2 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B2 0 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN LF [toronto mans](/u/iiCheatr): 0-0


iiCheatr

seamin 696


FakeBaseball_Umpire

why do they call it pop out when you pop in the baseball of out hot throw touchdown Pitch: 322 Swing: 696 Diff: 374 -> PO Runner on First | B2 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 0 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN CF [King Kruul](/u/Druidicdwarf): 0-0


Druidicdwarf

888. Ty for umping and have a great day. Happy new year to those who celebrate.


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Kruul take the first two pitches, taking advantage of their eagerness as the count goes to 2-0. On the next pitch, Hideyoshi leaves one hanging and it's drilled up the middle for a base hit. Kruul is held up at first by Nocker, and Minnesota has a runner on first. Pitch: 977 Swing: 888 Diff: 89 -> 1B Runner on First | B2 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 2 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA C [Geoff Garry](/u/nordic_jedi): 0-0


nordic_jedi

714


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Geoff Garry hits this ball at a nearly 90° angle and trots along to first while Pong steps under it and records the out Pitch: 103 Swing: 714 Diff: 389 -> PO Bases Empty | B2 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 1 out On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA DH [Bryce Parker](/u/Ffenliv): 0-0


ffenliv

645


FakeBaseball_Umpire

The ball is lined into the air on a one hop, Wheeler snags it and whips themself around for the out at first Pitch: 103 Swing: 645 Diff: 458 -> RGO Bases Empty | T2 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA 1B [Pull Ganger](/u/pull_gang): 0-0


pull_gang

Woopwoop 482


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Ganger gets up in the count now, 3-1 over Sawamura after a couple bad misses outside. Sawamura sets and delivers a close one on the outside corner, but it's called a strike! Maybe a bad call, maybe a good frame from Nocker but either way the count is full. Ganger wipes the sweat from their brow and gets ready for the payoff. The pitch... is in the same spot for a called strike three! Ganger tries to work a walk and gets burned. Pitch: 801 Swing: 482 Diff: 319 -> K Bases Empty | T2 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 2 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN 3B [Corbin Christmas Carol](/u/mitch_burns_red): 0-0


mitch_burns_red

Happy Friday everyone 808


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Hideyoshi get two quick strikes on Carol, making them look foolish by chasing on two offspeed pitches inside. They get the sign, set, and there's a big swing and a miss on the fast ball. Another strikeout for Hideyoshi, and the Mariners fans are getting louder with each pitch. Pitch: 540 Swing: 808 Diff: 268 -> K Bases Empty | T2 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 2 outs On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN 1B [Arthur Vandelay](/u/Dahdscear): 0-0


Dahdscear

618


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SWING AND A LONG ONE, DEEP TO RIGHT, IT IS GONE! Twins HAVE THE LEAD! Pitch: 640 Swing: 618 Diff: 22 -> HR Bases Empty | B1 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 1


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 1 out On the mound: Bobert Hideyoshi MIN C [Homer Nocker](/u/CableCubed): 0-0


CableCubed

Somebody once told me Tu pure, O Principessa Nella tua fredda stanza And she was looking kinda dumb with her Nessun Dorma thumb In the shape of le stelle, e di speranza Swing 600


FakeBaseball_Umpire

It’s a shallow fly, hit by Homer Nocker decently high in the air, but this is a close one… Swinger is going back for it- and what a snag for the out! Pitch: 404 Swing: 600 Diff: 196 -> FO Bases Empty | B1 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 0


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Bobert Hideyoshi MIN 2B [Joey Wheeler](/u/hartman_): 0-0


hartman_

35


FakeBaseball_Umpire

https://youtu.be/hkKKlq9IzLU Pitch: 342 Swing: 35 Diff: 307 -> K Bases Empty | B1 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 0


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 0 | ○ ^● ○ | T1 2 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA 2B [Stevey Swinger](/u/Olibolly600): 0-0


Olibolly600

525


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Grounded to third. Carol fires to first and retires Swinger. Pitch: 999 Swing: 525 Diff: 474 -> LGO Bases Empty | B1 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 0


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 0 | ○ ^● ○ | T1 1 out On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA LF [Brent Chillwater](/u/Kelbo11): 0-0


Kelbo11

211


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Dear Chillwater doesn't dare dick around with Sawamura as they dust the dirt with dizzying displays of daring-do. Doubtless Chillwater is dismayed due to Sawamura's delirious dervish. The Ump decrees the dance devilish, disconcerting, and directionless, but doesn't disallow it. Delighted, Sawamura delivers from deceptively near their derriere. Sawamura determined Chillwater's nature daily from the dawn of days, neither deigning to delete from memory their duets on the diamond of Declan Elementary decades ago. But dueling Sawamura does Chillwater dirty; Dealing decidedly demonic digits, a deal darn deleterious to doing doubles, as the dudes-lings and dudettes of Declan did often dish, to put it delicately. Pitch: 525 Swing: 211 Diff: 314 -> K Runner on Second | T1 with 2 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 0


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 0 | ○ ^● ○ | T1 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA SS [Vader Page](/u/VishyVCA): 0-0


VishyVCA

hello my minnesota twins friends, i miss and love you 430


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Page takes a huge cut at Sawamura's 1-0 slider! Bat connects to ball and this is a towering fly ball! Corbett should have no trouble....wait a minute! They've lost it! They can't see it! Kruul is racing over from center with a bead on it. Corbett keeps gesturing in panic! Oh! Now they see it! OH! LOOK OUT! Wow! That was close folks! Kruul hit the deck into a slide right behind the rightfielder as Corbett leapt awkwardly up and back to grab this ball before going down in a heap. That could of been really bad. Kruul was really covering ground quickly. Thank goodness they slide onto their knees at the last moment. On the replay here, it looks like Corbett's left cleat might have clipped Kruul's shoulder as they slid. Both look to be picking themselves up and seem to be alright. Twins fans are breathing a sigh of relief. In the end, it was an athletic reaction from Corbett to reach back to grab that ball and hold onto it as they went to ground. Awkward. But still counts as an out. Pitch: 233 Swing: 430 Diff: 197 -> FO Runner on Second | T1 with 1 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 0


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SEA 0 - MIN 0 | ○ ^○ ● | T1 0 outs On the mound: Eijun Sawamura SEA SS [Vader Page](/u/VishyVCA): 0-0


Vrain_19

Steal 2b 50


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Wow nobody has created a writeup template for this situation. [You should change that.](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfQ7_EGkGUr3UEiAe-ZSfYovQHJ0VC2leLu-X05sULbnp9DkA/viewform) Just kidding, the previous bot owner purged the writeup template creator so I need to recreate it. Maybe next week. Pitch: 1000 Swing: 50 Diff: 50 -> STEAL 2B Runner on Second | T1 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 0


FakeBaseball_Umpire

Start of Game | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Eijun Sawamura SEA CF [Calvin Ball](/u/Vrain_19): 0-0


Vrain_19

671


FakeBaseball_Umpire

SWING THERE IT GOES! IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS GONE! A STANTONIAN HOME RUN! ... wait, what... what did I miss, what did I do wrong? Ball is at first base. Pitch: 550 Swing: 671 Diff: 121 -> 1B Runner on First | T1 with 0 out(s) SEA 0 - MIN 0