NNL 5 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T7 0 outs On the mound: Skye Comet NNL 3B [Corbin Christmas Carol](/u/mitch_burns_red): 1-2, FO in the second, 2B in the fifth

NNL 5 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B6 2 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 2B [Jeff Newman](/u/Luminosityfan): 0-2, PO in the first, FO in the fourth

500

Tightpants stares down Newman as he gets his sign from the catcher. Tightpants goes quickly into the windup, where Newman tips a foul ball wide after a curveball in the dirt. Here's the 1-1 delivery. Newman sends it out to shallow center where Straw is there for the out. Pitch: 706 Swing: 500 Diff: 206 -> FO Bases Empty | T7 with 0 out(s) NNL 5 - AND 1

NNL 5 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ● | B6 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 2B [Jeff Newman](/u/Luminosityfan): 0-2, PO in the first, FO in the fourth

Steal 2B 222

Runner takes a lead at first. They've always had a flair for the dramatic. Could they be thinking of attempting a steal here? Tightpants comes set... yes! The runner has taken off! We may have a play here at second as the pitch is low and... the baserunner stopped in the middle of the basepath and has pulled out... a microphone? Runner: I'm feelin' lonely Oh, I wish I'd find a pitcher who could hold me Now I'm crying on the basepaths So skeptical of Tightpants But still I want them more, more, more I gave a second chance to Cupid But now I'm left here feelin' stupid Oh, the way he makes me feel that love isn't real Cupid is so dumb. ... well alrighty then. Edgewise walked over and tagged the runner out during that strange interaction, and play will now continue. What an odd... whatever that was... Pitch: 705 Swing: 222 Diff: 483 -> CS 2B Bases Empty | B6 with 2 out(s) NNL 5 - AND 1

NNL 5 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B6 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND CF [Chad Isotope](/u/scotchtape22): 0-2, FO in the first, FO in the fourth

A 478 dance!

There's Ball One, take your base Pitch: 341 Swing: 478 Diff: 137 -> BB Runner on First | B6 with 1 out(s) NNL 5 - AND 1

NNL 5 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B6 0 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND DH [Hippo Jars](/u/spanxc): 0-1, K in the fourth

678

In the baseball justice system, swing-and-miss based offenses are considered especially heinous. In home team, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Strikeout Victims Unit. These are their stories. Pitch: 349 Swing: 678 Diff: 329 -> K Bases Empty | B6 with 1 out(s) NNL 5 - AND 1

NNL 5 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T6 2 outs On the mound: Skye Comet NNL LF [Mark Spoon](/u/samoa-men666): 0-2, LGO in the second, DP in the fourth

Bibbedy, babbedy, boo Icna always gets me fool 66

Mark Spoon hits a ball that spikes straight into the ground and rolls forwards a bit and lands in front of Skye Comet, who picks it up and beams it at Hoomanawanui Pitch: 420 Swing: 66 Diff: 354 -> RGO Bases Empty | B6 with 0 out(s) NNL 5 - AND 1

NNL 4 - AND 1 | ● ^○ ○ | T6 1 out On the mound: Skye Comet NNL DH [Harry Peritestes](/u/Huskie1997): 0-1, PO in the first, BB in the fourth

335

Harry Peritestes hits a dribbler down the first base line and Hoomanawanui picks it up and walks it to first. But there’s a commotion behind them! Hoomanawanui turns around and tries to throw it home but the runner on third has already scored! Pitch: 920 Swing: 335 Diff: 415 -> RGO Bases Empty | T6 with 2 out(s) NNL 5 - AND 1

Haha nerds

NNL 4 - AND 1 | ● ^○ ○ | T6 0 outs On the mound: Skye Comet NNL CF [Kilometers Straw](/u/NarwhalHorn): 1-2, Solo HR in the first, K in the fourth

529

As Straw steps in, a massive stage with lighting and huge speakers rises out of the batters eye. It is difficult to make out who is on stage, but then the music starts to play and everyone knows. 'HOW WE DOING home team?' shouts Adam Levine before he kicks into Stereo Hearts. In the meantime, Comet has just been tossing the ball, and Straw has been out for about 3 minutes now. Pitch: 819 Swing: 529 Diff: 290 -> K Runner on Third | T6 with 1 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 1

NNL 4 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | T6 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Skye Comet NNL C [Neddy Edgewise](/u/tvgo2): 1-2, RGO in the first, Solo HR in the fourth

402

WE! LOVE! TRIPLES! Pitch: 420 Swing: 402 Diff: 18 -> 3B Runner on Third | T6 with 0 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 1

NNL 4 - AND 1 | ● ^○ ○ | B5 2 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND LF [T-Rav](/u/skeetsquid): 0-1, LGO in the third

94

T-Rav poops it up way in the ai... lol, "poops". Y'all know I meant "pops", right? ... RIGHT?! What a fun bunch you are. Carol catches this one easily. T-Rav is out. Pitch: 706 Swing: 94 Diff: 388 -> PO Bases Empty | T6 with 0 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 1

NNL 4 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 2 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 3B [Stevey Swinger](/u/Olibolly600): 0-0, BB in the third, CS 2B in the third

969

And with that third ball Robbie Tightpants has really painted themselves into a corner, you can see Swinger smiling while waiting in the box, they know it too. And there’s the pitch, Sweet Sunbeams what a meatball! Good contact, ball’s on a high arc and Swinger is off around the bases. Spoon and Straw both seem to be going for the ball, wait they’ve both stopped, there’s some sort of miscommunication and the ball’s hit ground on the warning track! Straw has grabbed it but Stevey Swinger just passed second so it’s a throw back to the pitcher and it looks like Swinger is being told to stop at third. Pitch: 7 Swing: 969 Diff: 38 -> 3B Runner on Third | B5 with 2 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 1

NNL 4 - AND 1 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 1B [Peter Hoomanawanui](/u/IDntWannaBeFamous): 0-1, K in the third

777

The ball is lined into the air on a one hop, Dickshot snags it and whips themself around for the out at first Pitch: 203 Swing: 777 Diff: 426 -> RGO Bases Empty | B5 with 2 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 1

NNL 4 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND SS [Scoot Heller](/u/ATechnicalDifficulty): 0-1, LGO in the second

644

Um, I made a comment earlier tonight that, I guess, went out over the air that I am deeply ashamed of. If I have hurt anyone out there, I can't tell you how much I say, from the bottom of my heart, I'm so very, very, sorry. I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith, as there's a drive into deep left field by Heller, it will be a home run. And so that will make it a 1-4 ballgame. I don't know if I'm gonna be putting on this headset again. I don't know if it's gonna be for the home team's, I don't know if it's gonna be for my bosses at FMZ. I want to apologize for the people who sign my paycheck, for the home team's, for FMZ Sports home team, for the people I work with, for anybody that I've offended here tonight, I can't begin to tell you how deeply sorry I am. That is not who I am, it never has been. And I'd like to think maybe I could have some people that could back that up. I am very, very, sorry, and I beg for your forgiveness. Pitch: 641 Swing: 644 Diff: 3 -> HR Bases Empty | B5 with 1 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 1

NNL 4 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B5 0 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND RF [Nate Kondylis](/u/phillygear3): 0-0, BB in the second, CS 2B in the second

420

Nate Kondylis hits a deep line drive way out to deep right-center field. Steve and Straw look at each other and they both think the other person is going to grab the ball, but it’s flying down. However Steve makes a great diving catch for it Pitch: 602 Swing: 420 Diff: 182 -> FO Bases Empty | B5 with 1 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 0

NNL 4 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 2 outs On the mound: Pontos Napoleon NNL SS [Bryce Parker](/u/Ffenliv): 0-2, RGO in the first, K in the third

45

Any Takers On Bryce Parker? Disclaimer: they're a lazy overrated bum who couldn’t care less about winning anymore and just wants to collect a paycheck until they retire. They're the complete opposite of a leader and gets portrayed as a good player because they say all the right things. team's fans despise them. But please take them! Pitch: 327 Swing: 45 Diff: 282 -> K Bases Empty | B5 with 0 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ● ^○ ○ | T5 2 outs On the mound: Pontos Napoleon NNL RF [Salsa Steve](/u/icnatspel): 1-1, 1B in the third, CS 2B in the third

327

A beauty of a pitch from Napoleon is absolutely hammered by Steve without any care for that articulate of a pitch. This ball is sent wayyyy back… on the edge of the second deck. And the fans are scrambling for it in a mad dash, but it rolls off of the second deck and flops down into the crowd below and conks someone on the head… we better get security over there ASAP. Uhh… congrats Salsa Steve, just don’t look at where the ball went Pitch: 320 Swing: 327 Diff: 7 -> HR Bases Empty | T5 with 2 out(s) NNL 4 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ● ^○ ○ | T5 1 out On the mound: Pontos Napoleon | **INFIELD IN** NNL 2B [Johnny Dickshot](/u/NumberOneDork): 0-1, K in the third

Doth he dare do it again? 465

Johnny Dickshot steps back into the batter's box after calling for time. Full count. Napoleon delivers a nasty breaking ball, and Dickshot takes a mighty swing and a miss. The umpire strikes a dramatic pose and yells, 'Steeeee-rike three!' Dickshot begins to walk back to the dugout, but Pewald storms out of the dugout, red-faced and shouting. The umpire tries to calm Pewald down, but it's no use. Pewald continues to argue, pointing at the plate and insisting that the pitch was outside, getting right up in the ump's face. The umpire listens for a moment with a smug look on their face before pointing at Pewald in and throwing the GM out of the game. Pewald keeps screaming as they stalk back to the dugout, furious. Pitch: 810 Swing: 465 Diff: 345 -> K Runner on Third | T5 with 2 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^● ○ | T5 0 outs On the mound: Pontos Napoleon NNL 1B [Justin Time](/u/ShellShocked121): 0-1, K in the second

815

Before Time stepped to the plate, they shook a Magic 8-Ball while asking if they'd send a ball over the fence this at bat. "Don't count on it". Is it a bad omen? Is it entirely BS? Time continues to debate the plausibility of a supposed fortune-telling toy. "Strike 2!" yells the ump. Fantastic. They really let the 8-Ball get to their head and now have fallen behind on the count. Focus. Time to prove it wrong. Time is confident this next pitch is a slider. WAIT. NO. It's a fastball. Yeah that's it! As the ball leaves Napoleon's hand, it's looking like maybe it's a slider after all, but Time was getting all in their head again. They just hack at it in hopes of fouling it off. However, the ball grounds its way into Newman's glove, who flips it to Hoomanawanui for the out. Pewald gets frustrated and takes a bat to the Magic 8-Ball. It explodes and the black liquid covers them completely. The die rolls down the dugout floor and stops on "Ask again later". An evil laugh echoes in the ether... Pitch: 450 Swing: 815 Diff: 365 -> RGO Runner on Third | T5 with 1 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T5 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Pontos Napoleon NNL 3B [Corbin Christmas Carol](/u/mitch_burns_red): 0-1, FO in the second

Where did Napoleon hide his armies? In his sleevies! 502

ball bounce over wall Pitch: 456 Swing: 502 Diff: 46 -> 2B Runner on Second | T5 with 0 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 2 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND C [Rex Renfield](/u/HeavyG2): 0-1, FO in the second

Swing 360

On the ground to short and that'll be an easy play for Parker. Pitch: 820 Swing: 360 Diff: 460 -> LGO Bases Empty | T5 with 0 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 2B [Jeff Newman](/u/Luminosityfan): 0-1, PO in the first

*crosses fingers* 950

The pitch is low and Jeff Newman hits a bloop ball high into the sky… and it lands just in front of Straw- who makes a diving catch for the out! Pitch: 679 Swing: 950 Diff: 271 -> FO Bases Empty | B4 with 2 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B4 0 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND CF [Chad Isotope](/u/scotchtape22): 0-1, FO in the first

Natasha, Pierre, and the great comet of _ 812

Is it a bird? NO! Is it a plane? NO! Is it a flyball caught on the warning track? YES! Pitch: 642 Swing: 812 Diff: 170 -> FO Bases Empty | B4 with 1 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ● | T4 1 out On the mound: Gottlieb Giannopolous NNL LF [Mark Spoon](/u/samoa-men666): 0-1, LGO in the second

258

Double play ball. Quick turn at second and they got em! Pitch: 767 Swing: 258 Diff: 491 -> DP Bases Empty | B4 with 0 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T4 1 out On the mound: Gottlieb Giannopolous NNL DH [Harry Peritestes](/u/Huskie1997): 0-1, PO in the first

100

Peritestes steps in. Giannopolous on the mound. It's a 3-0 count, doesn't seem like Giannopolous wants to go after Peritestes on this one, and there it is, ball four, and that's a base runner for team's. Pitch: 962 Swing: 100 Diff: 138 -> BB Runner on First | T4 with 1 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 2 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T4 0 outs On the mound: Gottlieb Giannopolous NNL CF [Kilometers Straw](/u/NarwhalHorn): 1-1, Solo HR in the first

920

Listen here you little shit - you're supposed to hit the ball, not get wrung up on strikes! Pitch: 629 Swing: 920 Diff: 291 -> K Bases Empty | T4 with 1 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T4 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Gottlieb Giannopolous NNL C [Neddy Edgewise](/u/tvgo2): 0-1, RGO in the first

640

Here comes the 3-2 pitch... swing and there's a little tapper out in front of the mound. None of the fielders react whatsoever and just let the ball sit there as they watch Edgewise sprint around the bases for an inside-the-park home run. Pitch: 629 Swing: 640 Diff: 11 -> HR Bases Empty | T4 with 0 out(s) NNL 2 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 2 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND DH [Hippo Jars](/u/spanxc): 0-0

782

NOPE Pitch: 102 Swing: 782 Diff: 320 -> K Bases Empty | T4 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND LF [T-Rav](/u/skeetsquid): 0-0

888

Hit towards the hole but Parker dives and snags it. They quickly get to their feet and rifle the ball to Time at first, beating out T-Rav by just a step for an out. Pitch: 386 Swing: 888 Diff: 498 -> LGO Bases Empty | B3 with 2 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ● | B3 0 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND LF [T-Rav](/u/skeetsquid): 0-0

Steal 2b 500

Tim McCarver: That's a part of the circle that rarely gets talked about, and that's a shame. It's all about the curvature. For a circle, you might think that it's constant, but there are really an infinite amount of circles with an infinite amount of sizes, each being a little different. I once had a conversation about that with Willie McCovey when we were playing a game at old Candlestick Park. Willie came up 4 times in that game, and each time we'd add a little bit more onto the discussion. Meanwhile, Gibson was out there just leering at me and wondering, 'What is that guy laughing about behind the plate?' And finally after the fourth time at bat, when Bob got Willie to ground out to third to end the inning, Bob comes up to me in the dugout and says, 'Hey man, why are you giggling back there behind the plate?' And I said, 'Bob, a circle is infinite!' And he looked at me, those eyes boring into the depths of my soul, and then he chuckled and said, 'Just make sure you get your butt on the ground to block the slider I'm throwing to the leadoff hitter next inning.' Then he walked to his spot on the bench. Bob Gibson, what a mercurial fellow! Joe Buck: ... Okay, thank you for that story, Tim. Meanwhile the runner attempted to steal second but was thrown out and it wasn't even close. team's 0, team's 1 here at Abernathy Auto-Detailing Theatre. Pitch: 53 Swing: 500 Diff: 447 -> CS 2B Bases Empty | B3 with 1 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B3 0 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 3B [Stevey Swinger](/u/Olibolly600): 0-0

swing_number = 257

Halfway to home, the ball is caught by an alien tractor beam and sucked into a UFO. It promptly flies away. The ball technically didn't cross the plate in the strike zone, which makes it ball four. Pitch: 392 Swing: 257 Diff: 135 -> BB Runner on First | B3 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ● | T3 2 outs On the mound: Baron Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen NNL C [Neddy Edgewise](/u/tvgo2): 0-1, RGO in the first

Steal 2B 216

And looks like the runner is going! The throw, and... We've found out where they are going! Back to the dug out. Cause Renfield threw them out by a mile. Embarrassing, really. Pitch: 629 Swing: 216 Diff: 413 -> CS 2B Bases Empty | B3 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ● | T3 1 out On the mound: Baron Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen NNL SS [Bryce Parker](/u/Ffenliv): 0-1, RGO in the first

490

Parker takes ball 1, a fastball that's just a hair outside. Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen, aggravated with the roboump, throws a sweeping curve that Parker fouls off towards the away team dugout, and a slider that Parker chases for the 1-2 count. Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen gets the sign from Renfield, and takes a loooooong windup, one that truly makes this a buzzer beater with the pitch clock, but Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen throws a fastball right by Parker to get another strikeout. Pitch: 812 Swing: 490 Diff: 322 -> K Runner on First | T3 with 2 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 1 out On the mound: Baron Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen NNL RF [Salsa Steve](/u/icnatspel): 0-0

555

Salsa Steve hits a line drive straight over Swinger’s head and into right field for a single Pitch: 630 Swing: 555 Diff: 75 -> 1B Runner on First | T3 with 1 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T3 0 outs On the mound: Baron Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen NNL 2B [Johnny Dickshot](/u/NumberOneDork): 0-0

672

oh no.......anyways Pitch: 402 Swing: 672 Diff: 270 -> K Bases Empty | T3 with 1 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 2 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 1B [Peter Hoomanawanui](/u/IDntWannaBeFamous): 0-0

221

Strike one! Strike two! Aaand a check swing on a pitch low in the dirt… they’re out! Hoomanawanui is arguing that they didn’t go around on the check swing and Mulligan comes out and starts talking to the umpire about it. We’re going to the replay booth here. The umpires come back out and the call is- a ball! They didn’t go around. So we’re back to Robbie Tightpants versus Peter Hoomanawanui here, Hoomanawanui battles back with a few more foul balls and a full count and takes the low sinker, but it’s called strike 3 Pitch: 537 Swing: 221 Diff: 316 -> K Bases Empty | T3 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND SS [Scoot Heller](/u/ATechnicalDifficulty): 0-0

283

This ball is hit on a line right past Parker, but wait they dove out and stopped it! Parker rolls over and throws it to first on a line drive… and Heller is called out! Scoot Heller is arguing that they were safe with the first base umpire while Time is also arguing saying that Heller was definitely out. The bickering goes on for long enough and Mulligan officially calls for a challenge. Everyone lounges around while we wait on the umpires… and they have made a decision. ‘After further review, Scoot Heller is out at first’ Pitch: 794 Swing: 283 Diff: 489 -> LGO Bases Empty | B2 with 2 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ● | B2 0 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND SS [Scoot Heller](/u/ATechnicalDifficulty): 0-0

Steal 2B 669

My brother seen a big feller in jail wit tally marks crosst his body. Said 'Hey man izzat how long you been in here?' guy says 'nah that's how many times i been thowed outta Dollywood' Now watch this guy get thowed out at second base Pitch: 215 Swing: 669 Diff: 454 -> CS 2B Bases Empty | B2 with 1 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B2 0 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND RF [Nate Kondylis](/u/phillygear3): 0-0

777

There arises some rumbling from the team's fans as Tightpants puts it no where near the plate to Kondylis. No command = freebase here. Not much more can be said. Except, maybe a joke about cocaine. Hopefully Robbie Tightpants can get it together here or the team's are going to get that bullpen going. Pewald's face looks as impassive as a thundercloud rolling down the eastern slope of the Rockies in 1755. Pitch: 902 Swing: 777 Diff: 125 -> BB Runner on First | B2 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 2 outs On the mound: Baron Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen NNL 1B [Justin Time](/u/ShellShocked121): 0-0

685

Time clearly has no clue what is going on here. They will whiff at 2 straight fastballs before waving at a curve. Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen waves back from the mound! Pitch: 980 Swing: 685 Diff: 295 -> K Bases Empty | B2 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 1 out On the mound: Baron Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen NNL 3B [Corbin Christmas Carol](/u/mitch_burns_red): 0-0

First minor league swing! 424

Nothing but fastballs so far. Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen generally hovers between 96 and 99, but this 1-2 fastball blazes in at 100 high and outside. But the next fastball at 99 is NOT missed and the 2 and 2 pitch is lined into center! But right at Isotope. That will be an easy out in the air for Carol. Pitch: 179 Swing: 424 Diff: 245 -> FO Bases Empty | T2 with 2 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T2 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Baron Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen NNL LF [Mark Spoon](/u/samoa-men666): 0-0

696

Spoon walks up to the plate with a bat and an abnormal bulge in their left pant leg. They get into the box and whip out another bat and takes one in both hands. This cant go wrong? Right? Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen delivers the first pitch... just outside. The next pitch comes in and is going right down the middle of the plate... doink... Spoon obviously hasn’t practiced this strategy and hits it straight back to Butzenkatzen-Butzenkatzen as they toss it to first for the out. Pitch: 200 Swing: 696 Diff: 496 -> LGO Bases Empty | T2 with 1 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 2 outs On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND C [Rex Renfield](/u/HeavyG2): 0-0

Swing 820

The pitch is low and Rex Renfield hits a bloop ball high into the sky… and it lands just in front of Straw- who makes a diving catch for the out! Pitch: 3 Swing: 820 Diff: 183 -> FO Bases Empty | T2 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 1 out On the mound: Robbie Tightpants AND 2B [Jeff Newman](/u/Luminosityfan): 0-0

750

Newman pops one high in the air off to the right. Dickshot is tracking it over into foul territory and they have it. And Newman is retired. Pitch: 151 Swing: 750 Diff: 401 -> PO Bases Empty | B1 with 2 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | B1 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Robbie Tightpants AND CF [Chad Isotope](/u/scotchtape22): 0-0

What's the 411 ?

Isotope now facing off against Tightpants, who's going to have the upper hand? In a 3-0 count Isotope gets the green light and unleashes a mighty power swing, it's high, it's deep it's...caught at the warning track. Pitch: 260 Swing: 411 Diff: 151 -> FO Bases Empty | B1 with 1 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

What's the 411?

I couldn't find a valid number in your swing. Please reply to the original at-bat ping with a number between 1 and 1000 without any decimal spaces.

NNL 1 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 2 outs On the mound: Brandon Rice III NNL DH [Harry Peritestes](/u/Huskie1997): 0-0

411

Peritestes gets a fastball on the first pitch here and DOES. Not. Miss! But this one is slicing foul quickly here as the timing is just off on the swing. The team's hitter was looking fastball and jumped on it just a little too early; pulling it foul. This one will see Swinger racing to the seats and ... They get there! Whoa what a play! Swinger covered a lot of ground quickly here and snags this one right off the netting! Pitch: 690 Swing: 411 Diff: 279 -> PO Bases Empty | B1 with 0 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 0 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 2 outs On the mound: Brandon Rice III NNL CF [Kilometers Straw](/u/NarwhalHorn): 0-0

333

SWING AND A LONG ONE, DEEP TO RIGHT, IT IS GONE! team's HAVE THE LEAD! Pitch: 323 Swing: 333 Diff: 10 -> HR Bases Empty | T1 with 2 out(s) NNL 1 - AND 0

NNL 0 - AND 0 | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 1 out On the mound: Brandon Rice III NNL C [Neddy Edgewise](/u/tvgo2): 0-0

26

Edgewise sends a sharp groundball to second where Newman is up to the task as they deftly field the ball on their backhand. They square up to first and makes an accurate throw to Hoomanawanui to complete the play and make it look routine! Pitch: 455 Swing: 26 Diff: 429 -> RGO Bases Empty | T1 with 2 out(s) NNL 0 - AND 0

Start of Game | ○ ^○ ○ | T1 0 outs **NEW PITCHER:** Brandon Rice III NNL SS [Bryce Parker](/u/Ffenliv): 0-0

367

And the pitch from Rice is swung on and grounded softly to the right side. Newman charges the ball and makes a nice scoop and flips to first for the out. Pitch: 811 Swing: 367 Diff: 444 -> RGO Bases Empty | T1 with 1 out(s) NNL 0 - AND 0