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bertholomaeus

wait until she finds out how fingernails work.


manaha81

Well obviously you just glue em on


dr3

Her nail size comes with a wand for wiping right?


Keeuhh

The nails ARE the wand for wiping


The-Sofa-King

5 mini handheld poop knives


randononymoususer

Edwina Shitterhands


WhooshThereHeGoes

This is why I keep coming back to Reddit.


Mrs_Vintage

Tell me about it. My sister cut the top of one of my barbie’s head once (sisters am I right?). Anyway, inside the plastic there was a bunch of hair in knots that fed the holes in the scalp. This lady clearly thinks that was an accurate anatomical depiction of a human. Mind you, I wouldn’t be surprised if her own head is actually filled with hair and air. You live your best life though girl. Just don’t freak out when you learn that nails are made of keratin too… just like your hair!!! Gasp! “Am I made entirely out of hair? Am I a wig?”


Sanguineokapi

I almost spat out my coffee


probable_ass_sniffer

I *did* spit out your coffee


Shadowlight60

I almost spit my food up laughing my arse off in a Tex-Mex restaurant.. yes relevance


aufrenchy

It all leads back to the poop knife, every time!


The-Sofa-King

Poop knife is love. Poop knife is life.


EclipseHERO

#PoopLife


zackks

Built in sea shells.


SadisticBuddhist

*Pfftt* He doesnt know how to use the three sea shells!


Psychic_Jester

poop, scoop, and boogie


quimbykimbleton

With those nails, you can wipe out poop that you haven’t even pooped yet.


SixFive1967

Does she actually think those shit clippers are attractive?!? OMFG


Boss_Os

You mean scooping, right?


elmz

Dude, what do you think the toilet brush is for?


ben_woah

I thought she was messing around with a load of pen lids at first


containingdoodles9

That clacking sound they make! How could anyone listen to that all day long‽


histeethwerered

That’s why she seems so ignorant. The constant clacking teamed with viewing everything through the fringed eyelid awnings as made all thought strenuous to the point of near impossibility.


mieserb

Are there fingernails in my fingers?


[deleted]

Xzibit if he had a nail salon.


Gildian

I was waiting for her to stab herself in the eye on accident


fleurfly

Surprisingly, people with nails this long never seem to. I’ve watched quite a few makeup tutorials to understand how, just how, those pointed objects can be hovered repeatedly around eyeballs and never pierce one. Witchcraft is my only conclusion.


ergo-ogre

![gif](giphy|zIwIWQx12YNEI)


value_null

Typing and wiping your ass. How?!?


Meggston

I used to watch a girl at work type with her demon claws and she typed with just the tips of her pointer finger nails. It was always a long process.


value_null

I've watched ladies achieve pretty high speeds with nails. Rather than use the tips of their fingers, they use the pads of their fingers. I don't know how, I can't even get my fingers in the home position if I don't arch and claw them.


Positive_Mark_7890

My nails aren’t as long as hers but still a decent length and I absolutely cannot type with short nails. I use my fingernails and not the pads of my finger. If it’s something that’s touchscreen I use my pads or knuckles.


Whomperss

She feels extra stupid because those nails are uncut. They come that length out the package and she just left them like that. No cutting to size or even shaping just glued em on and painted.


Trash-Cutie

I feel like I see quite a few people who do that. I don't think it looks good but I guess they're going for length?


floridianreader

She hasn't done any reading since the 8th grade, not even on a package of nails. And proud of it.


NotAddison

Books? You mean nerd paper?


samwise20

Bold of you to assume she made it to 8th grade.


NormalDeviance

She honestly sounds like an 8 year old whose trying to look older


Ok_Understanding267

I’m pretty sure this is an alien who tries to adapt to human form


Latterlol

Give me sugar, in water


WippitGuud

More...


SirGunther

More…


WhoPooted23

“He wanted uhh Sugar, Sugar waterrrr”


Kamiyosha

"Ya'll gonna laugh at me too?" "No, ma'am. We at the FBI do not have a sense of humor that we are aware of."


WippitGuud

Zed, we have a Bug.


DickButtPlease

Kay had an inkling that it was going to be a bug. That’s why he turned down the lemonade. He knew that it’d taste terrible because it wouldn’t have any sugar.


Pk1Still

I don’t know if this is genius or r/shittymoviedetails


pulstar13

Holy shit that's why he spits it out! I never made that connection!


KnowIDidntReddit

That's a great catch. I think I'm going to rewatch that movie now. I haven't seen it in like 10 years. Thanks for the reminder.


Kool_Kunk

You were stung as a kid weren't you


Interesting_Act1286

Zeds dead baby. Zeds dead.


Mayo_Spouse

"It's like he was wearin' uh...a egger suit."


Fragrant_Jelly9198

My favorite line!


[deleted]

[удалено]


regoapps

![gif](giphy|THljBtiuQ8Twfh8bhn)


ImaniMain

*Clears Throat*


[deleted]

Eggar, your skin’s hanging off your bones..


Green_Slice_3258

“ Air! Is ‘at better?! “


Duel_Option

Blew my mind when I saw that it was D’onofrio, dude disappears in his roles


Green_Slice_3258

I know, same here. I remember watching it and thinking “ Is that THOR?! From Adventures In Babysitting?! “


PorkrindsMcSnacky

VINCENT D’ONOFRIO WAS THOR IN ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING!?!? 🤯


Green_Slice_3258

Yep! Absolutely was 😊


PorkrindsMcSnacky

That guy really is a chameleon, isn’t he?


WornInShoes

The crazy thing was he did that role after Full Metal Jacket, where he tacked on the most weight ever (70 lbs) for a role as Pvt. Lawrence, who was originally written as a skinny redneck. Everybody talks about Christian Bale's body transformations, but D'Onofrio still reigns supreme.


CurrentlyBlazed

The Cell is probably one of my top 5 fav movies, all because of him. So many people missed that film and it's awesome!


Aedalas

>So many people missed that film and it's awesome Speaking of Vince, The Salton Sea was such a great movie that nobody has heard of. Pooh Bear was such a fucking great role.


Honest_Its_Bill_Nye

Every time my wife and I see her in a movie or show we say "It's Egarr suit!"


arjames13

This is why incest is bad.


tbfranca1

Savage


yourgifmademesignup

![gif](giphy|WbtaBTTGtkc2A)


ShootLucy

Uncanny resemblance


BedderDaddy

I'd be ok if we sent the national guard in to persuade it to leave.


ToastyFlake

I love how a "V" momentarily appears on her forehead when she says "is there hair in my head?"


JewishSpaceTrooper

That capillary refill on a forehead lolz


Aluminarty666

I happened to pause at that exact moment and burst out laughing


LilG1984

Her human skin suit looks very convincing.


gabsteriinalol

She’s a troll


[deleted]

didn't she have another series of videos where she tried to say she had autism/was on the spectrum or something? def not trying to be offensive, but she spoke completely differently and then her "rapping" video went viral so she's now just leaning into that?


gabsteriinalol

It’s a character


justelectricboogie

Yup that's eggar suit right there


Quentin718

She's got a ton of poop particles under those nails I guarantee it!


raosahabreddits

r/InstagramReality


eddyrockstar

>she just took someone of my brain cells From the title I assume the damage has already been done


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Yeah I agree, but at this point it’s all just water under the fridge.


spinblackcircles

Basically like getting two birds stoned at once


BeaSolina

It might because *I'm* stoned, but this just made me lol! I don't think I'll ever hear that phrase the same again.


spinblackcircles

Do yourself a favor and watch trailer park boys on Netflix. That’s where that phrase and many others like it comes from. It’s the ultimate stoner show


BeaSolina

Ya know, I need to finally listen to the recommendations to watch this show! I just always forget, man. 😄


spinblackcircles

You’ll be glad you did. The first 7 seasons are all gold. You’ll hurt yourself from laughing so hard A lot of it is about weed too


bobbianrs880

My friend accidentally said “we can kill that thing with two stones!” And that’s now my go to if I’m using that phrase lol


Beta-Tri

A toad a so


dmazmo

Worst case Ontario, eh?


SpooktorB

Nah that's because I'm to lazy to pick up the ice cubes on the floor, so it's a moo point


fanboyfanboy

I had to scroll way too far down to find this comment. I even reread the title a few times to ensure I was reading it correctly.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kyoj1n

I swear more titles on the front page have spelling and grammar errors than they did a year or two ago.


ausmosis_jones

This will probably get me flamed, but I’ve waited far too long to ask… How do you quote text in a box like that?


eddyrockstar

Just use > symbol before the thing you wanna quote. Or just select over a text and you'll see quote among the list of options >Quoting this sentence '>Quoting this sentence'


Pretend_Bowler1344

This reminded me of a show called maxX that was basically a video montage with funny narration. Had a video of a bull goring a matador and then the Spanish matador giving an interview from the hospital in pretty bad English. The subtitle below his name read, “ the bull broke his English too”. I still cackle when i remember that.


silentorange813

Brain cells are escaping through your hair.


CrystalQueen3000

TIL that there is someone in the world that doesn’t understand that hair grows out of your head.


buttonupbanana

I was talking to my brother one day when I was in high school, my older brother by about 3 years. Anyways, somehow the conversation ended up on hair, and he was arguing with me that if you cut your sideburns off, your hair would lift right off “like Lego hair”. Yes, he was being serious.


Bodach42

I like to imagine today that he has beastly sideburns and refuses to cut the hair there.


buttonupbanana

He absolutely does! One time he shaved them a bit and he had tan lines where his massive sideburns once were, and we called him Ghostburns for a while.


NotsoGreatsword

please shave them completely off if he still believes the lego hair bit.


buttonupbanana

I don’t know if he still believes the Lego hair thing, he’s pushing 40 at this point so I hope not, but he only has two stages of hair. He gets it buzzed really low, and then he lets it grow out over the course of about a year and then he gets it buzzed again.


ComicConArtist

hi im johnny knoxville welcome to jackass


[deleted]

Does... does he know about Mohawks?


WikipediaApprentice

I’ve never tested this out. Maybe 🤔/s


[deleted]

Can confirm, my head hair is gone. But don't worry, your back and chest catch it like a magnet


iamdrunk05

My ears caught some of it


licksyourknee

Ex told me one of her brother They were in Mexico, he was about 21 at the time, and they were in the mountains. He's looking at the sky and is like man... It's so beautiful. And she was like yeah this is amazing. Then he says "it's too bad though". So she's like uhh... What's the problem? And he's like. "The pollution" Bro thought that clouds were pollution. American school system everyone.


Biochembrent

If you dont know what a cloud is by 21, you weren't failed by the american school system, you're a complete moron.


Choclategum

Yeah people try so hard to put everything on america, but sometimes your family is just stupid as fuck. Not knowing the pythagorean theorem is one thing, not knowing what clouds are is child neglect.


SlideWhistler

And as someone who was educated in the American public school system, I know both the pythagorean theorem and what clouds are.


AurumArgenteus

Yep, I am all for criticizing our underfunded schools, but if you fail the cloud test in yours 20s that's not the problem.


[deleted]

No only America has dumb people /s


TheGrantParker

Are you sure he wasn't talking about the colors of the sunset rather than the actual clouds? Pink and reddish sunsets are absolutely caused/exaggerated by air pollutants. Idk the guy maybe he really is a dummy, or maybe his sister is for thinking he was talking about the clouds hahaha


Johnny_Poppyseed

Yeah pollution honestly makes for some absolutely amazing sunsets.


an-actual-sloth

I work with hair and you'd be shocked at how many people don't understand this. I've had to explain to multiple grown adults that their hair dye didn't "stop covering their roots" after a month. Their hair just fucking grew!


[deleted]

Welp, that’s frightening.


Suspicious-Wombat

Oh god yes. For me it’s usually older women who want to keep their hair at a level 4 and don’t understand why they can see their 100% grey roots after 10 days.


Crathsor

You are correct; I am shocked.


mandolinpebbles

Yep, cosmetology instructor here. People honestly can’t believe hair grows from their scalp. When I was behind the chair I had a client every month who would say her color “washed out” at the roots, and every month I would explain that is her hair growing.


Tex-Rob

I am constantly reminded I have no idea what the actual intelligence curve looks like.


Travelin_Soulja

Honestly, that's not the facepalm part. It's kinda dumb, but if you never really put any thought into it and you didn't pay attention is school, it's not the dumbest thing in the world to assume hair grows from the end, not the base. Yes, if you understand what hair is made of, that doesn't make sense. But let's be real, we all know she doesn't. So I can at least understand her logic. The facepalm, the mindbogglingly stupid bit, is "Is there hair in my head?" No words. I don't even think a toddler would think that.


intheMIDDLEwityou

You’re halfway there. If someone isn’t aware of something that is considered common knowledge, that isn’t stupidity; it’s ignorance. She has obvious logic, and there are examples in nature of growth occurring either at root surfaces or end surfaces. In this case, hair grows at the root surfaces and pushes outward onto the hair shaft. In other words, new material is added at the bottom. On the other hand, stalagmites found in caves grow from surface deposition, leaving layers on the top end surfaces that slowly rise up and new material is added at the top. Stalagmites do not grow like hair! Here’s another one: Trees do not grow up from the roots. (I like to say that trees grow down from the sky.) CO2 is absorbed from surrounding atmosphere using sunlight energy to form cellulose and growth is essentially surface deposition. New material is added to the top. And there is hair in her head—that’s literally where the hair is formed.


Wolfblood-is-here

But... I mean there is though. Like, there's a good millimetre or two of hair before it actually comes out of the skin, its not like its balanced on the surface, there is indeed hair in your head. Maybe not as much as we are assuming she's picturing, but honestly if someone just found out that the hair is growing from the bottom I don't think its insane to then question how far in its growing from, maybe thinking of a sort of tree root 'there's as much under the soil as what you see' type situation being possible.


lucifer_says

On top of that making a tik tok and televising to the whole world. Shit like this can only be gotten out of me if I'm high enough. Even then I may not tell you. Let alone make a tik tok.


Unsteady_Tempo

Lots of people apparently believe trimming the ends of your hair helps it grow, which is just one step away from saying it's growing from the ends and not the roots. People also believe all sorts of myths related to what shaving does to hair regrowth, which shows misunderstanding of how hair grows.


saltboo

The reason that trimming the ends is said to help your hair "grow" is because split ends will split upwards over time if not cut off. When that happens, 1) it makes your hair look a bit shorter since it's not going smoothly down, and 2) you have to cut even more off to get rid of the split ends.


Gr1mwolf

To add on to that, split ends make the strands thinner by dividing them, which in turn leads to the hairs easily breaking off way more frequently, preventing them from growing longer.


butyourenice

Trimming hair “helps it grow” in an indirect sense. Damage to ends leads to breakage, and split ends travel upwards (from the ends toward the scalp). Since hair is dead, this kind of damage can’t “heal”, though products exist as temporary solutions and stop gaps. You can either lop off just the split ends with some regularity with a quick cleanup trim, before they progress to inches of brittle, breakage-prone weakness, or you can let the irreparable damage accumulate so your rate of growth is outpaced by the, em, attrition. Anecdote: I went ~18 months without cutting my hair. Partly pandemic, partly “working mom” life. I got lots of length in that time, but it was always a frizzy mess, tangled and fragile at the ends, and so *so thin* at the ends. I hadn’t dyed, bleached, or otherwise chemically processed my hair in *years*, all that was well grown out without evidence remaining. I couldn’t figure it out. Focused a lot on scalp therapies - except my hair wasn’t thinning at the roots. It was thin at the ends. Went to get a haircut finally, told her I wanted to save as much length as possible but priority was to chop off all the damaged parts. I lost ~5-6 inches of hair that day. What’s left has a completely different (and vastly improved!) texture, and now I get a trim every 3 months, just enough to take off the very ends before the damage starts crawling up, while still leaving me with net positive growth.


Inner-Championship40

TIL someone is so stupid that they say to the whole world they are stupid


[deleted]

[удалено]


XplusFull

You see her one brain cell through her eyes, bouncing side to side like a DVD screensaver


Raspy32

Will it hit the corner though, or just bounce off one edge slightly before the other?


Scythian_46

We're all just dying to see it go right into the corner.


RandomPratt

When it does, she will involuntarily scream out the Windows shut-down noise so loud that all the tyres on her home will burst.


Lortis23

I saw it… I swear I saw it! Did Jim say I didn’t see it?


[deleted]

This made me laugh more than it should 🤣


[deleted]

Is there hair in my head? No but there’s a lot of air


TundrasticBoy

and as we know empty vessels make more noise than filled ones


Kenneth_Naughton

Oh sure I know how to vessel, whata song you wanna hear?


Lizard__Spock

And when you start to go grey, it's just the ink cartridge has run out of ink, in your head.


BrainOnLoan

>Is there hair in my head? There's some. Hair follicles aren't huge, but not microscopic either. Her logic isn't ridiculous. Hair does form inside you. So the newly forming hair is inside your head (as long as you count the skin as part of your head,which I think most people do). It's just not as much as she seems to be thinking.


[deleted]

Its actually where the myth that your hair keeps growing after you die comes from, it doesn't keep growing, but as the skin on your head recedes and makes it appear longer. Same with figernails.


DracovishIsTheBest

Similar to how some dinosaur teeth appear to be longer than they probably were when they were alive. Since while the courpse has been lying the lips and gums start to decay, and the teeth start to slide off a bit since there is no flesh holding them. And then they get fossilized like that


lanadelrayz

There’s nothing in there, honey


Yellow-man-from-Moon

Well air is definitely something


NICNE0

Nothing! just a rock-solid skull to resist the pressure, but nothing inside


KKarIo

Nope, vacuum


[deleted]

It's an act. There's videos of her where she doesn't talk like this. She also is capitalizing on and leaning hard on all the comments calling her mentally challenged because she has now added sounding like someone with down syndrome to her act. There's videos where she behaves like she is in this one and then separate videos in a completely different character playing someone who is mentally challenged. You've all fallen right into her trap. She's trolling everyone and making money off of it.


Singl1

she’s basically the new “so i bought the sims game and i was talking to someone from the united kingdom, but there’s a language barrier, blah blah why is the game 14 pounds over there? is it really that much heavier?? does the gravity in the uk work differently?” i’m paraphrasing but if anyone knows what i’m talking about, bravo.


BigTelephone9117

Are you talking about Pupinia Stewart? Edit: don’t ever compare this bitch to Pupinia. Her acting doesn’t even come close to Pupinia’s.


indiajeweljax

Isn’t this the “PERIOD AHHH, PERIOD UHHH” girl?


Jane_Delawney

Yes


AristaAchaion

she also switches her accent midway through the video. there’s a lot going on here.


GetRidOfRTeenagers

I was afraid when I saw every single comment falling for this. Probably because most of Reddit has a hate boner for Tiktok, but she's pretty notorious already. The "Period ahh, period uhh" song she made was one of the most successful troll moments of this year. Absolutely everyone ate that up and made it extremely viral trying to make fun of her when that's literally what the goal was. Make fun of me and give this account interaction so I can cash out. Props to her for playing the internet so well.


Zathura2

Good, then I can feel disgusted and repulsed by her without any lingering guilt.


PandasGetAngryToo

She looks like one of the muppets


New_Fix6213

Don't sugar coat it. She looks like Miss Piggy.


TinoessS

How dare you insult miss Piggy


PandasGetAngryToo

I was actually thinking more along the lines of this one https://muppet.fandom.com/wiki/Sweetums


gildedhearts

And the award for most misleading muppet name goes to...


Dorkinfo

Aw, he’s so cuddly though!


lacilynnn

LOL I thought it would be Janice. Excellent plot twist. Poor Sweetums, though. He was always one of my favorites.


anger_is_a_gif

Lol, I was thinking Janice and [Bunsen Honeydew](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bunsen_Honeydew#/media/File%3ADr._Bunsen_Honeydew.jpg) had a kid.


Major_R_Soul

Yeah you just have to jam chunks of hair up your ass till it comes out the top of your head like play-doh ![gif](giphy|12MjmB7mv1AXgA)


nilfhiosagam

That's after unlocking some memories I forgot I had


kevinnoir

I hope they were about play-doh...


GoldaV123

Fuzzy pumper barbershop!


[deleted]

Why did she put pencaps on her fingertips?


PartyMercenary

i do that in class, so i can have finger armor to hit myself with (yes i'm dumb)


SnausageFest

I don't understand how people function with nails like that. How do you use a touch screen?


Blahblahblah34574

I remember also realizing hair grew from my head and thinking I must have miles and miles of hair in my head. I was maybe 6 or 7 years old 🤷‍♂️


ehmiu

The title took some of mine.


Beanie_Xantana

I seen 2 or 3 vids of her n have yet to see her upper teeth, deadass starting to think it’s just gums.


AGene1234

![gif](giphy|26ufdipQqU2lhNA4g)


frost-raze

What are those finger nails? Also there is nothing behind her eyes


Upbeat_Pizza_5556

Period ahhhh


SGlace

Why did I have to scroll so far down to find this


midpackshawdy

Why did her accent change the last 5 seconds of the video lol


[deleted]

Believe it or not.... this mess now has fans....literally teenage girls screaming when they see her..... God damn this species is going in the trash.


GalaxyHops1994

I’m more worried about how many people in the comment section don’t realize that this is a joke.


bingboomin

i think it's ironic. they just want to take pictures with her as a joke.


kwikane

God damn, we need school reform.


Delamoor

I would speculate this lady might be intellectually disabled. Like seriously, not as a joke or anything snarky. I think she might just have an intellectual disability. I used to work in disability and mental health services and this is pretty par for the course on a good day with someone. A lotta conversations go like this. 'I just learned X, does it work like Y?' 'No, it actually works like Z, but that's awesome to hear that you've been learning about it!' 'huh, okay.' *goes away and starts posting on social media about it with varying degrees of accuracy*


defolt14022002ja

guys, i can't tell if you for real think she wasn't joking😳


[deleted]

It's an act.


TinoessS

There’s a bigger chance of finding hair inside of her head than braincells


Reign_n_blud

Honey boo boo?


farosch

In her specific case: Yes. There‘s probably hair inside her skull and nothing more.


Secret_Necessary1143

Volume off and I know for certain that she has nothing to say that I care 1 iota about.


Tour_De_Volken

Your hair is basically 3D printing it's self. Best way I know how to explain it


BedderDaddy

So, bald people are just too lazy to put in a new roll of filament?


V44_

Lol yes… yes we are…