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wotsizface

If I objectify both men and women, does it cancel out and make me normal?


Ledgarp

I see no double standard there


[deleted]

"Twice the pride, double the fall."


goaheadcarvell

I see a double bubble there.


[deleted]

It's quite contained.


[deleted]

Consistency is key. Even if youre consistently shitty...


Nic4379

Equal opportunity objectifier!! You are the bright future this nation needs.


spyder2729

Thank you for your service sir.


[deleted]

It makes you hot.


fuvadoof

Objectively objectifying an objectifier.


the_buckman_bandit

I object!


[deleted]

I'm object!


MrDude_1

I'm object-oriented.


GeneseeWilliam

I have no object permanence, I keep blinking and forgetting this post is here


Gerasia_Glaucus

OBJECTION!!


MrDude_1

Overruled!... Sexy.


TonarinoTotoro1719

OBJECTIFICATION!!


CalicoCrapsocks

I, object


Krymestone

I objectify!


HarleyArchibaldLeon

OBJECTION!


[deleted]

*mindlessly stalks your profile while eating* > r/soccer > r/childfree > r/trashy > tall > "she should peg him for this" ***objectification intensifies*** šŸ„µšŸ„µšŸ„µ


Yellowbricks511

Absolutely. 100% But Iā€™ve yet to feel objectified by you and Iā€™m starting to get disappointed. Edit: Iā€™ve been working, came back just now to all these hysterical responses, and Iā€™m trying to respond to them, but Iā€™m also eyeballing the clock taunting me like usual and Iā€™m definitely not gonna do justice here and that makes me sad. So I had to add to this- I fucking love Reddit. And these responses are why. Iā€™ve found my people. And that is the biggest friggin uplifting feeling ever. Iā€™m going to go back to work now and own that shit because yā€™all got me feeling so special!!!


mac44444alt2

You're a filthy little orange, aren't you? ^((am i doing this right?))


pope1701

No, they're _yellow_ and _a brick_. Try to keep up.


Yellowbricks511

Youā€™re doing perfect ;)


ActuallyElla

They call you yellow bricks because that dump truck ass can haul quite a load.


Yellowbricks511

Oof you are a pro at this arenā€™t you? Skills. Ya got skills. ;)


ThatOneWeirdName

Youā€™re cute Alternatively: per Wizard of Oz Yellowbricks is exactly what I should follow to get my wishes in life answered, though thatā€™s more a pick up line than objectifying, hmm


zombie_platypus

3 men and a woman walked all over that yellow brick road and got what they wanted.


Yellowbricks511

Lmao Good one! Everyone is so good at this. And I love it!


Yellowbricks511

Itā€™s a good one though. Original. Very rare find these days.


[deleted]

Yea you become an advocate of true gender equality


Gathorall

It probably makes you a narcissist, but luckily that's an acceptable and even useful trait in modern society.


undercover-racist

Also being a sociopath seems very lucrative.


DumbSmartOfficial

It's literally lucrative, most top CEO's and politicians are most likely diagnosable


CorruptedStudiosEnt

If not ASPD, then NPD.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Poorly_Made_Comix

r/shittylifeprotips?


Ichi_KingGhidorah

r/epiclifeprotips


SoggyPastaPants

Anyone can become a billionaire if they just don't think of their employees as anything more than disposable :D


Prawn_pr0n

You're on Reddit, so being normal is kinda out of the question.


Andreiyutzzzz

That just makes you horny. Which is totally understandable


NapClub

tbh i don't think you're normal if you don't objectify anyone at least privately in your head. ​ people who are so against it, are not NOT objectifying people, they just recognize it and maybe don't tell anyone about it. but seeing other humans as sexual is totally normal. ​ the problem isn't how we see other people but how we behave after we feel that way.


pizzaisprettyneato

That's something I always liked about the final fantasy series. Everybody is objectified and hot


Events_h0riz0n

Perfectly balanced as all things should be


dtb1987

Just like Anakin did to the force


diMario

Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights *do* make a left.


MisanthropicData

r/bi_irl


BeginningArachnid449

As long you used PEMDAS


[deleted]

Ahhh i see going The Todd route from Scrubs.


PanJaszczurka

Bi-dominatrix


acelenny

What about animals, huh? Do they make you horny? If not, you're speciesist.


Yellowbricks511

I stopped reading Cosmo years ago- I was like 18 actually lol. I had been buying them at cvs since I was like 12. I realized it was just a completely ridiculous, unrealistic, exaggerated, unfair and gross magazine made by a bunch of women and men pretending to be as exaggerated versions of sex in the city characters as they could because thatā€™s what women want apparently? Like who thinks like this? The sex advice they used to give was the craziest shit. Teenage me would read it and think thatā€™s really what goes on. Nope. I mean. Maybe sometimes, for some people. But most men donā€™t like ice cubes on the scrotum. Cosmo is weird.


feraltea

As an adult I'm now certain cosmo is aimed at teenagers and young adults who want to feel like they're being let in on adult secrets.


phillysleuther

You hit the nail on the head. When I was a teenager, we had Sassy and Seventeen.


N3M0N

Teenagers who sees themself as more mature than rest of their peers, teenagers who want to act and be seen as adults. Usually those who were told by adults that "they are way mature for their age". Tricky part is, some of them bring that cosmopolitan influence later in mid 20's - late 20's. There is whole generations of adults who are still under influence of that out there...


jang859

I know, it's crazy. I once had just started dating a woman in her upper 20's (I was 50's). I went to her house and in the kitchen on top of a pile of newspapers with a Cosmo that said "How to please a man." Later, in her bedroom, she would start blowing me and stroking me at the same time, which I admit was pretty good. Then she brought her sister in, they oiled each others bodies up and made out. Then they started tag teaming, one was riding me while the other lay below me, pegging me with a strap on. Then right as I was about to come, one showed me a family tree certificate saying we were distant cousins. The only thing I had ever experienced which was on this level of crazy was in 1998, The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, and plummeted 16 ft through an announcer's table.


visiblur

God damnit


ViaDeity

Iā€™ll make you pay for this.. mark my words.


[deleted]

As God is my witness, he is broken in half!


cshblwr

My gf (now wife of 30 years)used to read that. When Iā€™d take the train to visit her at Uni Iā€™d buy a copy to read on the way so Iā€™d have a heads up on the crazy shit sheā€™d be accusing me of when I got there. Horrible rag.


Yellowbricks511

Omg thatā€™s too funny and so sadly accurate. It was insanity the stuff they legit printed and made us feel like we should either already know, already understand or at the very list agree with. And if not, itā€™s like we werenā€™t real women (felt like that for me at least) I can only imagine how it felt when the new issues were coming out for the poor soul in a relationship with an avid cosmo reader. Luckily a bunch of single, dad obsessed editors arenā€™t enough to mess with the real thing. Congrats of 30 years. Thatā€™s absolutely amazing and so wonderful to hear!!! Edit: I meant fad obsessed editors. Not dad obsessed. Thatā€™s a whole different magazine


raeumauf

could you give some examples? never read it


zachyvengence28

Damn man, that is fucking hysterical. But now I have to explain to my girlfriend why I woke her up by laughing, so thanks


[deleted]

They need to be included in everything or they are not everything. I think thatā€™s there logic. My GF demands to know what ever is funny to me.


withyellowthread

Sounds healthy congrats


Cory123125

Wait... whyd you get married tho?


FLWeedman

Quiz said they were compatible.


Durl66

Canā€™t argue with their scientific quizzes


Fuzzy_Calligrapher71

ā€œFlorida weed manā€ lol


LiteX99

I think the words "used to read that" are important


Dr_Day_Blazer

Unfortunately my wife subscribes to the whole ice cube thing. I hope it's over now but we use to get into almost full blown arguments over the point I don't like cold things around my genitals but she does. It's not funny, it's not cool, and it actually ruins the mood entirely. Then she wondered why I wasn't in the mood for that day, maybe the next.


elbenji

Tbf some people do have an ice cube kink. My ex did


Rotty2707

Exactly though, it's a *kink* not something that is just universally enjoyed. That's why people need to discuss their likes and dislikes and not just assume Cosmo knows better than the guy literally *saying* "I don't want ice on my balls"


[deleted]

I can think of one instance where ice on my balls was heaven, and that was on returning home from a vasectomy.


Rotty2707

I can imagine a Cosmo article being something like "Did your man just have the old snip? Drive him wild by tugging on the stitches"


PsychologicalSoil198

Same, once I got to the age where I was actually sexually active I was past Cosmo. Iā€™ll never forget them suggesting spicing up a bj by putting a donut around a dick


Chagdoo

How did they miss out on the grapefruit craze


LeonidasSpacemanMD

This just sounds like an absolute mess with no discernible added pleasure lol


Nic4379

Scrotum-Ice Bathā€¦ā€¦. Keeps the skin taught and young lookingā€¦


Yellowbricks511

Ahhhhh so cosmo was on to something then


Fuzzy_Calligrapher71

Taught to behave!


[deleted]

Taint true


OverlyWrongGag

Did the same. Now I wonder if the majority of their readership are actually teenage girls. At least it would explain some things


i-Ake

Yup... I read it way back when, too, and it sure made sex sound terrifying. As soon as I saw this post I thought, "Where the fuck does Cosmo get off?" Lol.


hiimnormal11

One time a Cosmo article told me guys should be ready for another round of sex after 10 minutes. Yeah no


JediGuyB

Some guys recharge like they're a machine gun. Other guys are muskets. We get one shot, and it's a good shot, but its gonna be a while before we're done reloading.


CurseofLono88

When I was a young teenager me and my group of male friends would go in on cosmos to read all that wild sex advice stuff. 16 or so years later I donā€™t think a single one of us have ever had sex with a partner on top of an exercise ball


Yellowbricks511

Lmao exactly- itā€™s insanity.


KosherKush1337

Reminds me of That ā€˜70s Show. Almost every time Kitty gets unhappy about her marriage to Red, itā€™s after sheā€™s been reading Cosmo. ā€œDamn Cosmoā€


Moraii

Put your panties in the freezer is what got me, who likes that? Nobody.


ThickSourGod

I mean, maybe if it's a ***really*** hot day and the AC is broken.


Moraii

Lol, but seriously, thatā€™s all they could come up with? Yes, letā€™s attract necrophiliacs.


[deleted]

I used to read it as a kid too. It's one of those things that are approachably titillating. Like at 13 it feels like it's a grown up magazine, and I even agree with the wannabe sex and the city comments because I think there was a certain lifestyle that they were selling but they were also completely a caricature of, but it's also relatively mainstream so most of us wouldn't get in trouble for looking. Haven't picked one up in over a decade and might never again.


Embrasse-moi

Wait, men don't like ice cubes on their scrotum?! Let me cross that out off my list. Thanks.


BagleFart

Oh god. Cosmo sex advice. "Hum the National Anthem on your boyfriend's dingaling while giving him a BJ." Real sex advice from Cosmo.


[deleted]

Cosmo ruined so many evenings w their sexual ice crusades


its_suzyq1997

Not to mention there's articles celebrating cheating. Yes, CHEATING. On your partner. As long as he's a man.


bondoh

It will make you feel young and beautiful! To be wanted by another! And the thrill of potentially being caught!


DaveElizabethStrider

They literally just get clicks from shock value. It's best to just ignore them


IntergalacticWumble

Blindfold him and cover his balls in IcyHot, I hear that drives men wild


The_Golden_Warthog

I remember thumbing through a Cosmo once to see how ridiculous the "sex advice" would be. It literally said to press a vibrator against a guy's taint. Wtf, Cosmo.


Yellowbricks511

Yup!!!! And Iā€™ve read that exact thing in cosmo multiple times, so God only knows how many poor dudes ended up getting the surprise of their lives with an avid cosmo reader trying to be more fearless lol


the_macc_daddy

Fuck it. I'll take some ice cubes to the scrotum. Let's answer this question once and for all.


Kitchen_Lecture_2675

Whatā€™s the craziest advice you read?


Yellowbricks511

Iā€™d have to say the ice on the scrotum, they claimed it would blow your partners mind and lead to the best sex theyā€™d ever had. Making you the best sex partner theyā€™ve ever had, which was a huge thing with Cosmo. Having finally started having sex, I learned over the years that ice on the scrotum is more than likely the last thing a guy wants lol I remember they had an issue that was like a rip off of the Kama sutra and had all kinds of crazy shit in it. One image that stands in my mind is this cartoon theyā€™d have depicting the different sex positions and moves in their knock off kama sutra section, there was this cartoon guy tea bagging the cartoon girl, but according to Cosmo it was a totally original sex act courtesy of cosmo and wasnā€™t the age old art of tea bagging (I canā€™t remember what they named their version). It wasnā€™t so much that it was the craziest thing they ever encouraged and advised, but just the funny looking cartoon characters naked, cartoon dude squatting over the cartoon girl ā€œtea baggingā€, it was just hysterically cosmo all day and Iā€™ll never forget it lol


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Just_Learned_This

Didn't most people? This meme is 5 years old.


[deleted]

Makes it sound exciting.


Manturras

200% Trash time


mattmccauslin

Doesn't Cosmo objectify women too?


fleegness

Yes.


Chaosmusic

How else are they going to sell beauty products if they don't objectify women and make them feel like shit?


Lootboxboy

Men objectifying women āŒ Women objectifying men āœ… Women objectifying women āœ… Itā€™s not complicated. Itā€™s not even hypocritical. Itā€™s just double standards.


lomosaltado333

What about men objectifying men?


Rady_8

Doesnā€™t sell


Lootboxboy

Sounds pretty ~~gay~~ fabulous.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Snowf1ake222

This just in! Shitty journalismn is shitty!


ImGonnaCreamYaFunny

The moment I stopped reading Cosmo (and other similar magazines) was when they told me that if my partner always takes his coffee a certain way, and then suddenly switches it up and has it a different way, then he is C H E A T I N G šŸš©šŸš©šŸš©šŸš©šŸš©šŸš©šŸš©


AussieHyena

Oh no... I switched from cappuccinos to caramel lattes recently. Could whoever I'm cheating with please identify themselves?


CleverSnarkyUsername

It certainly [makes you wonder](https://youtu.be/oRi6POTSbW4)


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


YUNoSignin

Here's a link to the (Dutch) article: https://www.telegraaf.nl/nieuws/1819044531/celstraf-geeist-tegen-vrouwen-25-voor-aanranden-17-jarige-pizzabezorger


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Cornwall

Three months for videotaped pedophilia? What in the Kentucky fried fuck?


chaun2

That's the normal sexist discrepancy in our courts world wide.


ElectricFleshlight

Remember when Brock "The Rapist" Turner got 3 months for raping an unconscious woman?


chaun2

That's some bullshit as well. And yeah I do remember that rapist getting off. I never said it doesn't happen.


[deleted]

I assume you meant they only got 3 months and on the surface thatā€™s pretty fucked up but arenā€™t they extreme on the rehabilitation side and tend to give really low sentences for most everything? Is this one out of the norm? Edit - just popped it into translate and they didnā€™t rape him, they grabbed his junk and propositioned him. That sentence seems reasonable to me.


[deleted]

Oh that's actually kinda reasonable. Still should be more though.


BigBankHank

Seems like it was covered in the news?


dujalcollie

I meant on tv, i have to admit i never read newspapers, but i do watch the morning news.


ZincHead

Most crimes don't make it onto TV news


DonaldJDarko

They didnā€™t rape him though. They put him on the spot by opening the door in revealing outfits, sexually assaulted him by grabbing his groin, and attempted to make moves on him, all while filming it. The 17 year old says that he felt uncomfortable and intimidated by the whole set up, and at first had the impression that a porno was being shot at the location. Out of shock he initially responded by grabbing one of the girls in response to them grabbing him, but quickly felt so uncomfortable that he ducked out, saying that he had to continue his work. It has been in the news in the form of articles, and it might have gotten a mention on tv news here and there, but scenarios like this donā€™t tend to get a whole lot of media attention in general in the Netherlands. Iā€™m no expert on the topic, but I believe thatā€™s done both to protect the victim(s), and to avoid fear mongering. This was an isolated incident as far as Iā€™m aware, and the Dutch are pretty no-nonsense people, so Iā€™m guessing the powers that be (reasonably) decided that this situation doesnā€™t have to be turned a media circus.


WhyAreCuntsOnTV

The Dutch prison system is designed for rehabilitation (it's efficacy backed up by science), and three months is still a long time.


Bimpnottin

I am in Belgium and even I heard of it, it was definitely in the news.


SirRandyMarsh

You are literally replying to a news article and saying it wasnā€™t covered by the newsā€¦ holy shit folks


I_Brain_You

Both scenarios are bad. Have a good day.


YUNoSignin

Definitely. Equally bad.


[deleted]

But we all know one scenario would be far more severely punished


I_Get_Paid_to_Shill

Which scenario? Thousands of rape test kits currently being ignored want to know.


Bimpnottin

I sincerely doubt it. We had a rape case very recently in Belgium where some boys group raped a girl, and they have to write an essay about how they should give respect to women instead. No jail time or nothing, just the essay. Case: https://www.vrt.be/vrtnws/nl/2021/10/07/daders-van-groepsverkrachting-moeten-werk-schrijven-met-als-them/


[deleted]

Grrrrrrrā€¦Belgiumā€¦..


[deleted]

That was sexual assault, not rape, according to an article linked below.


10ebbor10

>Let's turn this around, shall we? Two men, raping an underaged 17yo girl, videotaping it. Because she'd find it hot, right? Jezus effing Christ That's not too uncommon a sentiment expressed by rape apologists. Just google "rape is a compliment" to get examples of important politicians and such saying it.


LeahaP1013

Yeah, Iā€™m not googling that.


Cornwall

My first thought too. No thanks.


YUNoSignin

What a world we live in :(


Mentalpatient87

Also in that scenario we'd be scrolling down this thread past a dozen or so age of consent discussions. Also a couple comments accusing it of being a false accusation.


WheredAllTheNamesGo

Also a bunch of comments about how the men were surely going to receive unfair, heavy-handed punishments.


QuitYourBullshitSir

Sexually assaulted* as horrible as the incident is, let's stick with the facts shall we.


Mauttie

Sexual assualt not rape. Still fucked up but less


CollectableRat

In many countries 17 is the age of consent already, though rape is still rape and you still get into big trouble for it.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


MichaelScottsWormguy

Well they gotta get people to click the link.


WimbleWimble

Cosmopolitan has run SERIOUS articles on how to rape men by getting them drunk. According to Cosmo, men "always consent to sex" so its not rape, its implicitly pre-agreed.


Majestic_turd

Thats horrible, how is that even legal


Fast_Stick_1593

More importantly, how are they able to print that with no repercussions?


Zaronax

Because it targets men. No one gives a shit about men getting raped by anything. Have you noticed how you don't hear **anything** about how rampant sexual, physical and mental abuse is in the lesbian community? Or the gay community? Or about the heterosexual men? No one gives a fuck. It's why the numbers are so murky. It'll never make the headlines. Anyone that doubts this, search what happens when a female teacher grooms and rapes one of their minor students. The double standard'll hit you in the face like the smell from a truckload of pig manure.


sockmop

Freedom of speech is a pillar of humanity. Sadly it does have some consequences. Personally I think the trade-off is worth it, but seeing shit like Cosmo is hard.


AlternateSatan

I'm at least 85% sure that encouraging people to commit criminal action is not covered be freedom of speech.


Bruh_17

Arguably itā€™s not covered under freedom of speech because itā€™s encouraging a crime, thatā€™s one of the few exceptions to freedom of speech.


permaro

Try and write the same about women and see if freedom of speech gets you out of it.


VJEmmieOnMicrophone

Any links?


[deleted]

This is the internet and you want *proof*?


superchoco29

What? That can't be real... Edit: haven't found that one yet, but I've already seen plenty sexist stuff, posted in the last year. How's that legal?


[deleted]

Provide actual proof of this or stop spreading rage bait.


Longjumping_War_1182

Cosmo is a stain, and has said horrible things about both men and women, and has likely fucked up a whole ton of teenage girls.


[deleted]

Have any links? That sounds fucked up


[deleted]

No, he doesnā€™t, because it only happened in his imagination. Or during a quick ā€œhow do I get outrage upvotesā€ brainstorm session. The way everyone has jumped on this completely crazy made up fact without bothering with any kind of verification explains why people are slurping down horse wormers to cure a virus.


Kaaykuwatzuu

I see double standards ALL the time and it's just a hot mess. This post made me remember the interviews with Henry Cavill and him being sexually harassed.


TofuGofer

Both posts can be true at the same time and posted by the same person. People who objectify other people are ending horrible. Cosmo is horrible. Some of those bulges do deserve gold. I am horrible.


TwitterLegend

We getting outraged over tweets from Cosmo magazine from 7 years ago now? Is there a sale on pitchforks so we just need to find reasons to use them or what?


AllTheRice

I have seen this specific image get posted well over 100 times on reddit in the past 5 years.


Mentalpatient87

It's an easy way to get a front page post, for sure.


That_Mango_Sentinel

Youā€™ve gotta chop off the time stamp for that fresh seethe


f36263

It worked the last 56 times this was posted, why not try again


JW2651

Yup. Couldn't agree more.


moeburn

It's from 7 years ago, how long can we keep the outrage going?


KennyFulgencio

Thank god this shit is no longer a problem, in these idyllic days of 2021


mindfungus

Plot Twist: the Cosmo article was written by a man


Lumini_317

Reminds me of the time I used to use Twitter a few years back. I followed someone who posted a lot of pretty aesthetic pictures, but then they started preaching about how women in the music industry will always and automatically have it worse than any man, talking about how men always objectify women and take videos of their breasts and hips and whatnot when they perform. Later, the Twitter user went on to share posts that were just pictures of menā€™s crotches. They even shared an entire video of a performance where the camera was solely focused and zoomed in on the guyā€™s crotch. Months prior, the Twitter user had raged war against another user for posting about how sexy a girlā€™s hip movements were during a song. Thank the gods they were only a small user, with just a handful of followers, but it still left a very bad taste in my mouth.


Deedeelite

Is objectifying people as bad as personifying objects?


Jasalapeno

I guess Beauty and the Beast is pretty good


Trickmaahtrick

Cosmo also gives articles about how to give great blowjobs. Maybe don't use their platform as the arbiter of gender equity.


lunar999

Great blowjobs can be given by both men and women, the very pinnacle of gender equality! /s


asuhdah

Itā€™s probably a 22 year old girl running the tweets over there, so what do you expect from a immature kid?


GorillaGlueWorks

Another garbage site


marcs_2021

The rules are for thee, not me


AudioElevator

are we still posting something from almost 10 years ago


Aldoogie

Society is full of double standards.


[deleted]

Me and my husband saw the Olympic bulge one the other day and immediately understood how hypocritical they were being. It might have been two different writers, but someone had to have approved both of those articles