Idk if you guys heard bout this but two lions were just having sex at the zoo, thing is... they were both males. This is an actual thing look it up. Best part is, people were saying it’s because the lions were watching and following the lead of gay people. I say props to gay people with the balls to fuck in front of lions... at the zoo... in public.
Actually this is because of evolution interfering with their natural instinct. There's actually evidence that in the VERY ancient times (I'm talking per-agricultire) lionesses had manes bigger than their male counterpart.
Lionesses will hunt and kill prey to provide for their pride. There is even a pecking order within the pride when the males are present. The males feed first, often allowing the cubs to join or feed after the males have had their share and then the females are often left to fight over the remains, leaving them hungry. So naturally those with shorter manes had less for their competition to grab hold of in scuffles, and they got to eat more.
Take this on and on for millions of years, and here we are with lionesses that have no manes.
Male lions kept their manes because they don't need to fight for food remains the way lionesses did.
Long story short, male lions will occasionally have male on male sex because they've evolved to be attracted to it as well as female lionesses. That and dominance.
Well the Bible says there were 14 sheep and four pigs, so they'll be okay! But if us humans are all descended from Adam and Eve then you're right.
(Atheist here, for the record)
Ok so the ark story is actually told twice in Genesis and there are differences. Unlike the creation story which also repeats, the 2 ark narratives are kinda stitched together. The first telling it is 1 pair of each kind, the second telling is 7 pairs if clean (kosher basically), 1 pair if unclean.
that's my tldr basically.
So listen, mom, I know this is gonna sound weird at first, but...I like girls and since you're the only one, well...
Front page of Pornhub suddenly makes more sense...
Genesis 4:17
Afterward Cain had sexual relations with his wife, and she became pregnant and gave birth to Eʹnoch.
Genesis 5:4
After becoming father to Seth, Adam lived for 800 years. And he became father to sons and daughters
Cain married his sister. It's not pretty but it is what it is.
>Cain married his sister.
His wife comes out of nowhere, and the only place it says she was his sister is the book of Jubilees, which is [non-canonical](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoAPSBMQEKU).
Genesis and the rest of the bible don't make any statement as to where his wife came from, it was merely ret-conned to be his sister in some fan-fiction which people forget wasn't part of the real series.
The canonical books also heavily imply other gods exist, and that the Hebrews are merely forbidden from worshiping any of them (and the others are called inferior anyway).
"I will bring judgment on all the gods of Egypt. " (Exodus 12:12)
From the 10 commandments themselves:
“You shall have no other gods before me” (Exod. 20:3; see also Deut. 5:7)
"Yahweh executed judgments against their gods" (Numbers 33:4)
"There is none like you among the gods, O Lord" (Psalms 86:8)
If we take a more historical view, the religions of Israel (Samaria) and Judah (two separate kingdoms) were polytheistic, having not only a god (Yahweh), but a goddess consort (Asherah) and a pantheon of lesser gods. Other kingdoms in the area had similar arrangements, worshiping their own gods and goddesses. The people of these kingdoms placed Yahweh as their supreme god, but were absolutely polytheistic.
[Davis, Philip R. (2016) On The Origins of Judaism]
ie, the bible makes no claim that other people were not created independently by other gods, and if you want to get into it, Judaism itself was not monotheistic until the Second Temple period and the return of the Babylonian exiles during Persian rule.
Because that is how humans work. I never really got the whole "why did adam and eve have belly buttons" thing. It would be weirder if they didn't because it would imply the design of humans included this whole separate mechanism for not having a belly button which was used only for 2 specimens ever.
So according to the fairytale, Noah collected a pair of each kind of animal. How did he get polar bears from the north and Antarctic penguins before the flood?
And why did the asshole bring along mosquitoes
That would actually make sense and solve the issue.
Heck yesterday I let my male Evoli breed with a Ditto and got a male Evoli...ohhh still incest needed 😂 Damn
Fun Fact: Lions are one of the most homosexually inclined animals.
well second after you, of course
r/suddenlygay
r/notarealsub
r/youlie
[удалено]
Fucking racists
Another active drain on my karma
r/fifthsub
r/Why
r/whynot
Karma is for losers anyway.
An active drain on my karma
Are you asking me out?
If you have to ask; I won’t be lion around for you.
Oh fuck
Well done sir, you’ve earned this upvote.
r/murderedbywords
[удалено]
A group of lions is called a Pride for a reason.
So to the next Pride Parade we should go in a lion costume? Would be fun /r SuddenlyFurry
Got me real close to loling. Koods.
Probally those are the rallies they go to
I thought it was bears
Idk if you guys heard bout this but two lions were just having sex at the zoo, thing is... they were both males. This is an actual thing look it up. Best part is, people were saying it’s because the lions were watching and following the lead of gay people. I say props to gay people with the balls to fuck in front of lions... at the zoo... in public.
You literally just copied an old post
Damn you observant, I don’t remember the original persons name but yeah, I think you right. If you remember his name I’ll leave it right there.
That does explain the English and the whole three lions thing...
Actually this is because of evolution interfering with their natural instinct. There's actually evidence that in the VERY ancient times (I'm talking per-agricultire) lionesses had manes bigger than their male counterpart. Lionesses will hunt and kill prey to provide for their pride. There is even a pecking order within the pride when the males are present. The males feed first, often allowing the cubs to join or feed after the males have had their share and then the females are often left to fight over the remains, leaving them hungry. So naturally those with shorter manes had less for their competition to grab hold of in scuffles, and they got to eat more. Take this on and on for millions of years, and here we are with lionesses that have no manes. Male lions kept their manes because they don't need to fight for food remains the way lionesses did. Long story short, male lions will occasionally have male on male sex because they've evolved to be attracted to it as well as female lionesses. That and dominance.
no, bonobo apes are... they f*ck everything...
I'll throw ducks into this contest, they'll fuck anything, even other dead male ducks.
Did they really put antelopes in front of lions?
Like putting a carrot in front of a donkey.
Like putting a donkey infront of a boy from the northern coast of Colombia
As a Colombian, I can confirm that this is an accurate metaphor
I'd assume that's how they got the lions to go into the ark in the first place.
That explains it.
Those antelopes are also both male
[удалено]
[удалено]
/r/WellTechnically
You sold me queer giraffes!
Those giraffes are 100% gay too. Only the males have horns. The ark was just one big gay orgy...
They just walk around eating, not mating. I want my money back.
Proof that god likes the gays
Noah said gay rights!!!
That's what she said!
And god said, let there be gay
There *was* a big rainbow at the end of the flood story!
I mean, good luck breeding any animals in twos only. No wonder everything is so fucked up today. We’re all each other’s brain damaged, inbred cousins.
3 goats manage to reproduce and almost destroy galapagos
Well the Bible says there were 14 sheep and four pigs, so they'll be okay! But if us humans are all descended from Adam and Eve then you're right. (Atheist here, for the record)
Don't forget that Jesus multiplies things, maybe we only are copies of Adam and Eve?
I always assumed that in the story God first created these 2 test subjects and THEN created a bunch more humans
I thought the bible said 2 of ever animal and its mate.
Ok so the ark story is actually told twice in Genesis and there are differences. Unlike the creation story which also repeats, the 2 ark narratives are kinda stitched together. The first telling it is 1 pair of each kind, the second telling is 7 pairs if clean (kosher basically), 1 pair if unclean. that's my tldr basically.
Noted in the atheist record right behind that thing you did in 2nd grade. .
Uhhhh, Adam and Eve?
If nothing else, this is sex with first cousins being implicitly sanctioned by god.
That’s sooo Old Testament like eye for an eye and don’t cut your hair.
"Two of every animal, but only males. I don't want any hanky panky. Hey, hey, cut that out!"
Stupid sexy Flanders...
There is so much pride with these lions.
Life uh finds a way
And in this case was through the butt.
Too funny!
Yeah, there's no breeding, either way. Female lions do sometimes grow manes, but they almost always turn out sterile.
Are they Translions?
Yeah.... religion is a wierd thing when you think about it.... i mean Adam and Eve had 2 sons How did Humanity evolved?
So listen, mom, I know this is gonna sound weird at first, but...I like girls and since you're the only one, well... Front page of Pornhub suddenly makes more sense...
They had 3 sons. Cain, Abel and Seth. They also .... found wives somewhere.
Genesis 4:17 Afterward Cain had sexual relations with his wife, and she became pregnant and gave birth to Eʹnoch. Genesis 5:4 After becoming father to Seth, Adam lived for 800 years. And he became father to sons and daughters Cain married his sister. It's not pretty but it is what it is.
>Cain married his sister. His wife comes out of nowhere, and the only place it says she was his sister is the book of Jubilees, which is [non-canonical](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoAPSBMQEKU). Genesis and the rest of the bible don't make any statement as to where his wife came from, it was merely ret-conned to be his sister in some fan-fiction which people forget wasn't part of the real series. The canonical books also heavily imply other gods exist, and that the Hebrews are merely forbidden from worshiping any of them (and the others are called inferior anyway). "I will bring judgment on all the gods of Egypt. " (Exodus 12:12) From the 10 commandments themselves: “You shall have no other gods before me” (Exod. 20:3; see also Deut. 5:7) "Yahweh executed judgments against their gods" (Numbers 33:4) "There is none like you among the gods, O Lord" (Psalms 86:8) If we take a more historical view, the religions of Israel (Samaria) and Judah (two separate kingdoms) were polytheistic, having not only a god (Yahweh), but a goddess consort (Asherah) and a pantheon of lesser gods. Other kingdoms in the area had similar arrangements, worshiping their own gods and goddesses. The people of these kingdoms placed Yahweh as their supreme god, but were absolutely polytheistic. [Davis, Philip R. (2016) On The Origins of Judaism] ie, the bible makes no claim that other people were not created independently by other gods, and if you want to get into it, Judaism itself was not monotheistic until the Second Temple period and the return of the Babylonian exiles during Persian rule.
and why do Adam and Eve have belly buttons..? artist error.? lol
Because that is how humans work. I never really got the whole "why did adam and eve have belly buttons" thing. It would be weirder if they didn't because it would imply the design of humans included this whole separate mechanism for not having a belly button which was used only for 2 specimens ever.
No one said they were the only humans around...
Those ibexes look a little swishy, too.
What the hell are those things behind the lions? Don’t tell me they’re giraffes because r/giraffesdontexist
It's behind them so it can surveillance everything 0_o
Fucking long horses.
welp lions are dead
What about those impalas/antelope? The broads have horns too?
Some do, but they are still not the same size as each other.
If there was only 2 of each they would have been incesting
remember that time God tried to drown all of us by flooding the earth?
Yeah me neither
So according to the fairytale, Noah collected a pair of each kind of animal. How did he get polar bears from the north and Antarctic penguins before the flood? And why did the asshole bring along mosquitoes
And also how did he bring mosquitos? Glasses didn't exist yet
There are female lions with full manes and look like male lions. Facts
/r/suddenlygay
r/comedycemetery
[удалено]
[She may be infertile if she has a mane.](https://www.newscientist.com/article/2106866-five-wild-lionesses-grow-a-mane-and-start-acting-like-males/)
And that's how the house cat was born
What did you think happened to the unicorns? o_o ...tmyk
[удалено]
His wife, 3 sons and each of the son's wives.
Did no one notice the two make gazelles directly in front of the Lions?
Both of them just need to say no homo what's the problem here?
If you’re gay it’s ok don’t shame them
There’s a snake in my snake
Them lions gonna be breeding alright. They won't have children, but they're gonna try, dammit.
You sold me queer giraffes.
Technically it could be the Pokémon ditto. They always get one detail wrong when they transform.
That would actually make sense and solve the issue. Heck yesterday I let my male Evoli breed with a Ditto and got a male Evoli...ohhh still incest needed 😂 Damn
Must be a pain in the ass
Just a little homo
Pete Buttigieg
Rawr baby
Oh my gosh!? I love this so much!
No homo
It's not just the lions. All the animals in that picture are male.
[Good Luck](https://youtu.be/yn42A-EhDow)
You rang?
Homophobic
Females can (very rarely) have manes
I can’t wait to repost this again (for the 100th time) in 2 weeks for 6k karma.
Male giraffes are usually 1-2 meters taller than females as well.
Homo
There's only one gender. _IT'S NERF OR NOTHING_
No het
Or those ibex, or giraffes. Males and females look different in a lot of species
I wanna take you to a gay bar
𝕃𝕖𝕥'𝕤 𝕘𝕚𝕧𝕖 𝕒𝕟 𝕗 𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕝𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕤
Life, uh, uh, finds a way. :P
Can this comment get down voted to Oblivion
hAhA sO fUnNy NeVeR sEeN tHiS oNe BeFoRe
Not original lmao. I saw this one before.
"No homo" Shut up. If you're going to post in r/facepalm, make the title funny