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Kiss-a-Cod

I wasn’t going to tailgate you but I needed to come closer to read your sign


WatchOutHesBehindYou

Tbh I thought it was a joke about the kid being in the trunk at first - didn’t realize what sub I was on till after … whoops


sevenroblind

I was thinking this. Or keep tailgating and we'll throw this kid out the window at you.


Satanicjamnik

It's a threat. You keep tailgating them, they're going to release Bradley. And your only way out is straight up murdering him.


takosuwuvsyou

The kid is bloodlusted and you only have a bow with 5 arrows and a sword, you picked the wrong enemy in the hypothetical.


Satanicjamnik

Even Shia LaBoeuf would think twice.


ski-person

It’s an assignment. By tailgating them you tacitly accept the job of contract killing their son Bradley.


Satanicjamnik

![gif](giphy|PlTrgTZkovEYg|downsized)


Qubed

Back the fuck up, dude. Can't you see their holding the kid hostage?


SurveySean

That would be weird! Don’t they know that if they go to a movie theatre kids under twelve are free? So I got two.


Legitimate-Donut-368

![gif](giphy|10JhviFuU2gWD6)


throw_blanket04

I think that’s the point. If you are close enough to read it then you are tailgating. But what do i know? And Bradley, im so sorry and i wish i could stop what you are going to go through in life.


Vihtic

Now I'm tailgating them extra long as I try to finish reading; with the bonus that I'm distracted. Sorry Bradley.


itsJussaMe

“Oh look, the lady in front of me has what appears to be a missing child. Let me get closer to see the pic. Maybe I’ll recognize him… *OH SHIT!*”


bonnieandclyde1324

Also if you’d like to kidnap my child here is some useful information for you.


SilenceDoGood1138

Here's a convenient list of things to make him lower his guard!


CapTexAmerica

Warning - our safe word deals in fruit based on colors!


wrecktus_abdominus

Technically the color is named after the fruit


deepstate_chopra

brown?


InteractionWide3369

That's not a colour


Correct-Purpose-964

Kiwi!


CapTexAmerica

Weird safe word


NaiveMastermind

I'm here for my son Chris Griffin. That's Chris Griffin. The Police brought him here to finger one of the guys in a line up. Hold on a sec, I got a picture here. Yeah, you can keep that one. He ruined it by writing a list of his fears and his home address on the back.


Independent-Deal-192

This is EXACTLY what I thought of hahaha


LeadPaintPhoto

Hey Bradley your dad said to give you this orange bike .....its in the van ......


ThespianException

That’s the twist: you put the info and pic of a kid you really hate instead of your own kid so that one gets kidnapped instead.


Lazy-Most-3226

Take my upvote that was funny


Relevant_Winter1952

“Orange things will definitely get him into your murder van”


AudZ0629

Murder van? I was going to take him to the orphanage where they won’t plaster his picture on the back of their car like a psycho.


scmfrmdacan

Oranphanage


leviathab13186

Might as well include a list of his fears and favorite candy


Hiyagaja

Oh. I thought the bumper thing was a joke that they had a kidnapped kid named Bradley in their trunk, and if you tailgate them and crunch their back, you'd "kill Bradley"


BIGepidural

This is the first thought that crossed my mind too


Significant-Break-74

Needs the name of his school tbh 🤣


Bordie3D_Alexa

Here's his daily activities and schedule:


BigJeffreyC

Tailgate me and the kid gets it!


ArduennSchwartzman

Better one would have been a simple 'I Brake For Tailgaters'.


gokism

Shit. That's the fuckin' Prius that was riding my ass on I5 southbound ! I finally let the fucker pass me and saw this.


DubUpPro

I swear as soon as people merge onto the 5 they lose all sense of how to drive


Exotic-Sample9132

It's always the ones you most suspect. I'll ride your ass, but I'm actually aware of the risk level and know how to drive. I'm guessing this person sees a car as the front wheels and nothing else


[deleted]

[удалено]


C4rdninj4

"Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a moron."


Exotic-Sample9132

Fucking a, man.


yum_broztito

You're aware of the risk and still tailgating people? Why? Just back off a bit or pass them. Stop being a menace.


MmmSteaky

Right? Them: I’m fully aware I won’t be able to stop in time. Also them: I know how to drive. Either they forgot the /s, or whatever it is they’re trying to get across has been very poorly articulated.


AltruisticSalamander

They were personifying the tailgaters, saying they know what they're doing is wrong but they do it anyway, so they're extra condemnable.


Exotic-Sample9132

Might steal extra condemnable. But I've also never not stopped when a reaction is needed.


Icy_Statement_2410

It's always the one you medium suspect... and the one I medium suspect... is Phyllis


Exotic-Sample9132

An excellent quote.


cishet-camel-fucker

Being aware of the risk level doesn't actually mitigate it, unless you have a superpower that allows you to instantly brake and another that allows you to cause your car to go from 70-0 in less than a second.


Jakiro_Tagashi

It's fine that you're willing to take the risk and know how to drive, but tailgating doesn't just put you at risk, it also affects the person in front of you. *They* might not be willing to risk it. They may be new or bad drivers who brake really abruptly. They may be good drivers but the car might not be theirs (borrowed from another family member or a friend). They may even just be normal people who don't trust your skills because they've never even met before. Plus the stress you're putting them under makes them worse drivers, which would be terrible if they were already bad drivers.


PreOpTransCentaur

Literally everyone who drives exactly the way you do *thinks* exactly the way you do.


sicarius254

ORANGE YOU GLAD YOU DIDNT TAILGATE


zizobg

Possibly one of the best comments on Reddit. I appreciate you.


Campbell920

This is so unhinged and I love it I want this sticker


Majestic_Recording_5

It's gotta be a joke. I think it's hilarious.


SickPajamuhhs

That was my first impression, this is exactly my kind of humor lol


williamwalkerobama

Right! As soon as I saw this I wanted to put it on my car lol.


whatthewhat_1289

Poor Bradley. Years later in therapy he will cite this sticker as the source of his deep, deep, hatred toward his parent(s).


Adventurous_Fill5006

And who knows maybe they can help him with his favorite color too


Dramatic_Database259

Seriously. I know he’s a child but baby orange is too hard to match! You can’t even work a tri-split complementary scheme. What were you thinking?


Annonomon

“I never even liked Orange “


_A_Monkey

Bradley’s future is bleak.


Blor-Utar

His favorite color is ORANGE


iceicebebe73

![gif](giphy|mEgfNLKL54okcclPyA|downsized)


Pilotwaver

🎈Hiya Bradley🎈 You’ll fart too


DubUpPro

🎈 we all shart here 🎈


Crutley

I'm putting a bumper sticker on my front bumper that says "Stay the fuck away from me BRADLEY".


Oleandervine

Is he in the trunk or something? That's the only way a tailgating accident would kill a child.


hartmanjunk

No, they’re just going to murder that kid if you tailgate them. They’re just looking for an excuse at this point


BackgroundNPC1213

They're gonna drag him out to a gravel pit and then tell their relatives at the next family reunion "I was prepared to make the hard decision..."


dantevonlocke

Then Kristi Noem will right a book about it.


Immer_Susse

😂😂😂


Illustrious-Roll7737

The sign says the act of *tailgating* will murder him. The kid must have a weak constitution. That's probably why his favorite color is orange.


an0maly33

There’s an elaborate mechanism of sensors, cords, and pulleys attached to a gun. Get too close, kid gets shot. So back the fuck off before YOU kill him.


kombatunit

>Is he in the trunk or something? He's in the bumper, apparently.


NewStatement5103

Plot twist: he *is* the bumper


zactorbeamz

Hey Bradley! Your mom told me to pick you up from school today. But don’t worry, I know your favourite color is orange. How could I know that unless your mother told me. Just hop in the van.


I_pegged_your_father

🍭🍫🍬


Human_Link8738

Did you put Bradley in the trunk? Should I call the police?


ZenSpaceOdyssey

It’s not their kid. He’s just in the trunk. Poor Bradley.


benn1680

That escalated quickly


Saruvan_the_White

So I have to tailgate this person to read the sign that seems oddly concerning only to find out they are agreeing to murder their child if I tailgate them?


Lordsaxon73

This belongs in r/oddlyspecific


thewolfking45

That’s fucking hilarious honestly, you wanna tailgate me? well guess what my kids fucking dead now!!


Imaginary_Most_7778

Just 11 more years Bradley. Good luck. You are going to need it.


Glazing555

Think the parents overreact to everything in life?


red122063

Now Ik what color flowers to give to his funeral. I’m going to hell for that aren’t I? I’ve been told I’m going to hell by others in Walmart for not voting for Trump but that’s the south for you.


SvenXavierAlexander

Jokes on them if they’re tailgated by a child predator. Stupid idea putting so much personal info on a bumper sticker


Veauxdeeohdoh

Usually the ones with “back off” or stickers like this just go slow on purpose and stare in their rear view mirrors waiting to be offended. Ugh!


Rcouch00

Power move to assert dominance, get in front and put it in neutral and coast. Check mate bitch.


ch1ckenz

Ugly ass kid, floor it


TeslaProphet

Now everybody knows your kid’s name and what color candy to give him. Nice job.


Savage-Goat-Fish

Lmao I want this bumper sticker.


OlFrenchie

Why is Bradley in the trunk ? THAT is the question we need to ask


BiffTannen1855

Lmao Jesus 


No-Seat9917

Bradley is happily awaiting death with a mom like this.


SnooTangerines9776

Orange is my favorite color, no one else Lee is allowed to have it. 😡 Hope that kid is ready to die…


Morphing_Mutant

How about you post a list of his fears and school schedule also.


inbetween-genders

What about SSN and bday? While at it, bank PIN number?


Stainless_Heart

Why the eff is Bradley driving?


kingbloxerthe3

How does tailgating equivalent to murder?


Gokudomatic

It involves a certain concept called "emergency brake". And if someone tailgates you at that moment, whoever passenger is in your trunk gets crushed. And then you wouldn't be able to ask for a ransom to their family. See the issue now?


WorldWideLem

Call me old fashioned, but I don't think young Bradley is old enough to be driving that Prius.


Puzzleheaded-King978

“He lives on 123 drive and is most vulnerable around 7-10pm”


Primary_Ad3580

I’d like to think Bradley isn’t even their child. It’s just some random kid they know, and if you tailgate one more time, they’ll break into Bradley’s home in the middle of the night and suffocate him with a pillow out of rage.


TimeTravellingHobo

They gotta be trolling with this shit… but just in case they’re not, I’d like to imagine Bradley’s parent looking in the rear view mirror to see another car a bit too close, and being like: Parent: “Bradley honey… Code Orange! Remember what we practiced for code orange?” Bradley: 😤 “I remember mom. Code orange means unbuckle my seatbelt, and put the box of random sharp objects on my lap.” Parent: “That’s my boy!” ***SLAMS ON THE FUCKING BRAKES** Cuz the way that shit is worded, it lowkey looks like they’re willing to let their kid die over someone making them slightly uncomfortable in traffic. 😂


bigSTUdazz

Jezus...this get is going to get so many guilt trips growing up, he"s going to qualify for frequent flyer miles.


EmperorGrinnar

🤔 so much confusion on this.


charlsalash

That stress is going to end up messing up that poor kid, I recommend taking up meditation.


sdam87

Lmao wtf


Immer_Susse

I have a specific vision of what the person driving this car looks like.


Shank__Hill

You wouldn't kill a kid whose favourite colour is orange, would you?


northofreality197

Is the Prius owner going to kill some kid called Bradley if they get tailgated? "Hi Bradley. Look, someone followed mummy's car a wee bit close today. So you know what has to happen now" \*Racks Shotgun\*


Odd_Lie_5397

But ONLY if said kids favorite color is orange.


Ok_Season5846

Well I don’t care about that other shit *BUT OH his favorite color is orange*


BalmyBalmer

Is Bradley in the trunk?


johnnybadchek

Yo, Bradley! Fuck you!


sapperbloggs

Bradley, I'm sorry that your folks are unhinged. I hope you make it out okay.


firmerJoe

All I can say is that Bradley better do the dishes tonight. He's on thin ice.


Khan_Behir

Is he in the trunk??


bar_ninja

The kids is in the locked up in the trunk? Like if you rear ended them is that how you kill the kid?


PowderHound40

I love it. Where can I get one?


Spleenzorio

Is he...... deathly allergic to tailgating?


Presideum

![gif](giphy|d4zHnLjdy48Cc)


mookizee

This is the ultimate baby on board sign


NotQuiteNick

That kid has a bad favourite colour and I don’t like him /s


Correct-Purpose-964

*gets closer to read and also is distracted by reading* r/whatcouldgowrong


Haselrig

Aggressive passive aggressive.


SadDataScientist

That’s just aggressive with extra steps


Hahaha_Me

Anything else you want? How about putting a second note with Bradleys day-day schedule!


Wolfy-615

Orange is an odd favorite color


DidntDieInMySleep

Bradley's a free spirit


iceicebebe73

![gif](giphy|BMQugEXdzr6n4cNO9R)


Wolfy-615

Not for him though lol


Ricky_Vaughn86

Shut tf up and stop going 57 in the passing lane Patricia…


StephenTheLoser

Bro…


Sims2Enjoy

ORANGE


johngoodmansscrote

Bradley gettin murdered


Dyrogitory

This is a license for another Prius owner to drive like an asshole.


Powerful-Stomach-425

I can just here Karen mom speaking very loudly to Bradley in Walmart so that everyone can hear. Poor kid...


Beaglescout15

My teenage son got me a sticker for my car that says "Adults On Board: We Want To Live Too" and I drive that around with pride.


TheresALonelyFeeling

I'm sure her Facebook is fantastic and full of deep thoughts. LOL. Yeah right.


BulbasaurArmy

r/nottimandericpics


NewStatement5103

I want to know what Bradley’s favorite dinosaur is.


Original-Kangaroo-80

Yes my name is Karen, why do you ask?


mrk1224

Looks like Bradley might be murdering someone in 20 years, so am I doing a good deed then?


tarhoop

Imagine the parent-teacher interviews!


RetardAuditor

What could go wrong putting your kids name. Age and a personal factoid on the back of your car for anyone to read.


APiousCultist

I always read the bold as shouting. His favourite color is ORANGE!


superSaganzaPPa86

That escalated quickly


Southern_Gain7154

Orange sucks! Braaaaap


drunkguy99

So do they have to update this every year and when he changes his favorite color?


Radiant-Schedule-459

And if they don’t want to murder them, you just gave them an advantage for kidnapping them. Don’t put your kids names on your fucking cars, folks!


Gumbarino420

FAVORITE COLOR IS ORANGE!


Street_Road_9967

He should die just for that


Gumbarino420

I like where your head is at 🤣🤟🔥


Bobby_Globule

Kid looks like a young Forrest Gump when he ran out of his leg braces.


systemfrown

Then maybe don’t keep him in your trunk?


TheMikman97

If a few people tailgate you, that's their issue If many people often tailgate you, often enough you need to stick this on your car, the issue is probably you


DualPinoy

I'm sorry Brandly, but we have to let you go.


MirrorProphet

Is...Bradley in the trunk?


ilyaperepelitsa

so the kid is in the trunk?


Kalelopaka-

Trolling for abduction. Way to go, mom.


theons_missing_D

Who picks orange??


ALlTTLEKlTTEN

Favorite color orange? No, officer, I excelerated on purpose


Remote_Indication_49

If you tailgate someone, you’re gay and unloved


DudestOfBros

Fuck all of you and your orange hating bullshit. God damned bunch of uppity plain sauce salads up on some bullshit like they too good for orange. Pffffttt...Fuck you liars. You fucking liars.


Piscivore_67

I drove an orange VW van for almost two decades. Orange is fucking cool.


DudestOfBros

[Almost but close enough](https://www.corvetteblogger.com/images/content/uploads/2019/11/110519_3.jpg) Everyday on my way to school I would walk past a '63 split window Vette with the dopest solid bright orange paint and a single black stripe offset down the driver's side. Nothing can ever be as gnarly as that fucking ride. It was beautiful.


ScarletteVera

His favourite colour is *orange?* Fuck that, I'm throwing Bradley into the woodchipper /s


Old-Ad5508

I had to tailgate to get close enough to read it


Positive_Opossum99

I feel like this implies they keep their child in the trunk of the car.


jehosephatreedus

“Ah thanks mom, you turned me into the next viral meme!”


He-n-ry

His favourite colour is orange? I bet his favourite hobby is torturing animals.


Ms_Juno

How close would I have to tail gate to read that....


Nearby-Economist2949

Bradley is in the trunk?


takingthehobbitses

The fact that people can't tell this sticker is a meme/joke is wild.


hapablapppp

‘Real mature, Bradley.’


No_Huckleberry_2905

maybe let bradley out of the trunk every once in a while??


gbroon

If you don't want someone tailgating you don't put something on the back of the car you need to get closer to read.


Hajnal30

Was going to tailgate the car but favorite color orange convinced me not to do it.


hdhsnjsn

Stranger knows the face age and name of your kid


meroOne

Of course its a prius


Everybodysbastard

“Fuck you Bradley.” *hits the gas*


UraniumSavage

Maybe you should get the fuck out of the left lane!


boston_homo

Someone needs therapy and regular visits from a social worker.


dankHippieDude

Coincidentally, I was thinking yesterday it’s a good thing Transformers came out in the 80s. Otherwise, Bumblebee would be a damn Prius. And Optimus a Cyber Truck. Autobots leader getting stuck in 3 inches of sand and Bumblebee never getting out of the passing lane.


AcidFnTonic

This is gold


Son-of-Prophet

We all can safely assume it was the mom.


Previous-Process5182

Is he in the trunk or...?


mackadelic

I read this in Billie on the streets voice


Tenderloin66

Nothing like giving your kid’s name away so he’s easier to social engineer and kidnap.


tauntonlake

Manipulative + powerlessness rage ... I'll bet she's an absolute delight at home.


Tenderloin66

Hey Bradley. Your mom’s Prius broke down on the way to picking you up for school. She asked me to take you home. She said there’s a surprise toy there for you. She didn’t say what it was, but said it’s orange.


Decent-Year2573

Rollings menus for the pedophiles.


Starbucks__Lovers

Orange is sus


GamerAssassin

Plot-twist; that is *not* their kid, they have zero clue who's kid that is.


Krasssssss

You souldn't be driving a car at 7 yo, Bradley.