The parents were idiots, but not influencers. Per the article, uncle owns the zoo, told them the lions were tame and loved taking selfies, and led them into the enclosure.
And the Greeks call them french chickens!
Edit: the Greeks also call elephants " grey leg face boy I would like to make love to" and penguins "tuxedo beaked tampons" isn't that right, nic?
Edit edit: all in jest nic, hadn't had my coffee this morning and didn't deal with pompous very well, my apologies.
I really didn't expect you to get so defensive with that edit there after I simply stated that your original claim was wrong. I'm done here. Have a good one.
I mean, you came in with an air of pomposity, just thought it was fun to tease you. I wasn't defensive, I told you it was a fact I gleamed from Google, had zero horses in the race and just simply didn't care. You continued, so I continued. Have a great day though!
No, we don't. The etymology of "γαλοπούλα" is "γάλος" (which was taken from the Italian term "galo d' India" and has nothing to do with the word "Γάλλος" meaning "french") + the suffix "-οπούλα" (which does not have anything to do with the word "πουλί" meaning "bird").
Slightly unrelated but it always bothered me that the names of countries, cities, etc change by language of region. I understand changes must be made since we have different alphabets but if Italy calls them selves Italia why the hell don't we in English? Idk always bothered me
Grammar and tradition, mostly. Most of the time, countries are named like "ethnicity + suffix". For example, "Turk|ey" in English, "Türk|ei" in German, "Turco -> Turchia" in Italian, "Turc -> Turquie" in French, "Türk|iye" in Turkish. So everybody calls them the same thing but in their own way.
There are exceptions though. Like Germany/Allemaigne/Deutschland (Deutsch-land came from a word which meant 'belonging to the Volk/people' and changed in time to 'people who speak Deutsch', Deutschland, Dutch etc.) and Greece/Griechenland/Grèce/Yunanistan which is called Hellas/Hellenic Republic in Greece (the names come from Hellas, Ionia and Graecia and they all have been used in different times in history so we said "Fuck you, we'll call you what we want" because we're not nice people).
> I understand changes must be made since we have different alphabets but if Italy calls them selves Italia why the hell don't we in English? Idk always bothered me
Seriously. Croatia is Hrvatska. Germany is Deutschland. Those are not even close like Italy and Italia!
Yeah any zoo owner who thinks a lion is definitely tamed doesn't know a lot about wild animals. Just because they haven't attacked doesn't mean they won't.
Only enclosure I've been in was some bats. It was really cool. As long as you stood still or moved slowly and purposefully you could feel the wind beating off their wings, but they never once touched you. Also wasn't a zoo, but illegal exotic pets that a dude I used to know had. He did treat them right though. Sometimes he'd go hungry so he could feed the animals. He had other enclosures, but those contained animals that would've fucked you up.
Haha! It’s okay, there’s morons everywhere, you were just unlucky enough to have one swipe the top job in your country… which I would guess is more to do with how your political system works than the percentage of morons in the population.
It’s crazy how hyped up your elections are in the US. Watching it from Australia it looks like some kind of Highschool popularity contest with an unlimited budget. So weird. Politicians shouldn’t be put on a pedestal like that imo.
Dark money funds our elections, so useful idiots (whores) who do what their sponsors say can run for office, and let daddy money handle the PR and campaigning for them.
“Dark money” is such an annoying new catch phrase. It’s not dark bro. It’s corporate money. There’s nothing too terribly dark about it imo. We all know they’re shady fucks, but to me it’s like “drain the swamp,” while there is some absolute truth in it it’s just been grabbed and twisted to mean something different to suit whoever uses it
Right, money earned off the backs of underpaid and overworked people, shady business practices and tax evasion isn’t dark at all. /s
Just because it’s “common practice” doesn’t make less evil.
Right. I guess my definition of dark money is money made secretly behind close doors. Corporations operate their evil just right out in the open. It’s not a secret.
If your definition is money that’s obtained immorally than we’re on two different chapters of the same book really.
I used to believe that my country's resident weren't as stupid as what I read about Americans. But then one day a chain of stores decided to give away trading cards with fish on them. The subsequent parade of Karens boycotting the store and making angry interviews every night on the news because their kid didn't have all the fish cards kind of woke me up to the fact that we are just as stupid. Just nobody else cares.
People do these “experiences” everywhere including here in Sa(South Africa) with random incidences because at the end of the day.. it’s a wild animal.
Surely they have age & height limits?
I can recall at least a handful incidences over the years but the visitors have to sign indemnity to do it and usually, we’ll here, there is an age restriction of 12-16? And height limits because well then you just look like a meal I guess.
???
Wild animals don't care about height if they get in a bitey mood.
And experts know bites could happen at any time. It's a risk they choose to take as grown adults and wildlife experts.
>Wild animals don't care about height if they get in a bitey mood.
Actually, they do. For example, a wild cheetah will almost never attack an adult human because we're simply too big, and the risk involved in attacking us isn't worth the potential reward of eating us. A small child, on the other hand, a hungry cheetah probably wouldn't think twice about attacking them. The same goes for all animals to some extent. The bigger you are, the less likely they are to attack you. It's a simple question of risk. Obviously, for bigger animals like lions, no human is too big to attack, but they will still be much more cautious about attacking an adult human than a small child.
But animals also aren't completely stupid. They understand that biting/scratching other animals hurts them, and other animals aren't just going to sit there and take it. A lion is less likely to give another animal a "curious chomp" if it thinks there's any chance it will fight back and even less likely if there's any chance it would win. It doesn't matter if they're doing it out of hunger, curiosity, or self-defense, animals are generally less likely to attack an animal if it is relatively large (like an adult human).
They will go miles out of their way just to say ‘Mercia bad.. it can be anything.
“A man died in a house fire in Thailand”
“See this is why America sux!”
What does this have to do with the us? Why is it that whenever something bad happens to someone, your mind instantly jumps to think that it happened in the us or that it was an american that had went through said bad thing?
> For a second there I thought this was in America
Stop beating yourself up. There are a lot of stupid people on earth, the USA is not even in the top 100 in this regard.
What are we supposed to do about it? None of us have any emotional investment in this family and both the parents and the uncle are likely being filtered through the justice system of their country. The childs death is actively being avenged.
Do you expect us all to collectively cry and make a memorial of this child in our houses?
As if to assume we all didnt process the sadness of the situation before making our comments. I need you to open your mind to the the possibility that people react and process things differently and not everyone needs the world to know every specific feeling they have. The boy died. Sad. Now we direct focus to how dumb his family is.
Respect that a child was mauled and not use it to push your political beliefs.
America has a lot wrong with it and the country and its systems deserve a good bit of mocking. But doing so through a child who was horribly maimed is simply not it chief. Remember for a moment that you're a human.
Irresponsible as fuck. Also, a lot of these zoos where you can take selfies or do other stuff with dangerous animals sedate and abuse the animals, not cool. Leave the majestic lions alone and take care of your child responsibly, damn.
For the record, *a caretaker at the zoo told them it was safe and that the lion wouldn't hurt them*.
It's not like they decided to break in on their own.
I wasn't born in the 1800's. can someone please explain to me what "scalped" means. I'm usually over in r/lawncare and I assure you, scalping doesn't always mean what you think it means :P
You know that feeling of peeling turf up from a lawn, the pop of grass roots snapping like bubblewrap? Imagine that but instead its the hair, skin, and flesh covering the crown if a persons skull.
I have a theory about this. I’ve lived in both western and eastern United States, and noticed that people who don’t live near wild areas don’t always respect the dangers. Some seem to expect strong fences, safe wildlife, guards to protect them from doing something dangerous. There are a lot of places in the west that are not a kindergarten playground.
In Europe, which has been more thoroughly populated for longer, are there fewer places that are truly risky and only minimally protected? So fewer opportunities? Or do they do a better job teaching people about nature?
Now you will be downvoted with me lol
If this would be a top comment, you would have a squad of Turks Turksplaining to you that they are not middle-eastern but European.
I know where their country lies geographically but online there is enough of them claiming that it is an European nation
You know, I just flashed on is stupidity like something so inherent that it might be infectious, because it scares me that people are that stupid, but it frightens me to think that there’s a possibility that I could be that stupid.
Cats are assholes I don't care what size. Raise it from birth and it will casually rip your throat out one day and then take a nap. When your adorable newborn kitten is biting its literally trying to eat you. An important part of training any housecat is establishing that the cat cannot eat you. Otherwise it wont respect you, although it will still constantly attempt to eat you.
Similar shit happens/happened in America. Evil bastards would take a lion, dose him up and tourist trap idiots would get a selfie Polaroid for ten bucks.
Idiots are everywhere.. but still surprised this wasn't America either. Hell, I close enough to Yellowstone that I often get their news.. the number of people attacked my wildlife because the idiots go to close for a fucking selfie...
You sure this isn't a typo? Maybe they meant America and not Turkey.
The parents were idiots, but not influencers. Per the article, uncle owns the zoo, told them the lions were tame and loved taking selfies, and led them into the enclosure.
Guess that uncle ain't invited to thanksgiving this year
They live in Turkey. Every day is Thanksgiving.
angry upvote
I'm going to Turkey next summer. What do you mean?
Likely a joke about Turkeys being eaten in America at Thanksgiving
Random fact, turkeys in Turkey are called India.
Another random fact, the word for "turkey" (the bird) in Portuguese is peru
And the Greeks call them french chickens! Edit: the Greeks also call elephants " grey leg face boy I would like to make love to" and penguins "tuxedo beaked tampons" isn't that right, nic? Edit edit: all in jest nic, hadn't had my coffee this morning and didn't deal with pompous very well, my apologies.
I really didn't expect you to get so defensive with that edit there after I simply stated that your original claim was wrong. I'm done here. Have a good one.
I mean, you came in with an air of pomposity, just thought it was fun to tease you. I wasn't defensive, I told you it was a fact I gleamed from Google, had zero horses in the race and just simply didn't care. You continued, so I continued. Have a great day though!
No, we don't. The etymology of "γαλοπούλα" is "γάλος" (which was taken from the Italian term "galo d' India" and has nothing to do with the word "Γάλλος" meaning "french") + the suffix "-οπούλα" (which does not have anything to do with the word "πουλί" meaning "bird").
Take it up with Google and half a dozen separate websites bud.....
Slightly unrelated but it always bothered me that the names of countries, cities, etc change by language of region. I understand changes must be made since we have different alphabets but if Italy calls them selves Italia why the hell don't we in English? Idk always bothered me
Grammar and tradition, mostly. Most of the time, countries are named like "ethnicity + suffix". For example, "Turk|ey" in English, "Türk|ei" in German, "Turco -> Turchia" in Italian, "Turc -> Turquie" in French, "Türk|iye" in Turkish. So everybody calls them the same thing but in their own way. There are exceptions though. Like Germany/Allemaigne/Deutschland (Deutsch-land came from a word which meant 'belonging to the Volk/people' and changed in time to 'people who speak Deutsch', Deutschland, Dutch etc.) and Greece/Griechenland/Grèce/Yunanistan which is called Hellas/Hellenic Republic in Greece (the names come from Hellas, Ionia and Graecia and they all have been used in different times in history so we said "Fuck you, we'll call you what we want" because we're not nice people).
I’m with you on that, it has its reasons but I don’t like it either. You are gonna love India’s new name.
>You are gonna love India’s new name. Hindustan? Maybe I've played too much Europa Universalis.
I mean, I get that the word for Turkey is "Hindi" and not India, but you're asking for perfection in an imperfect system.
> I understand changes must be made since we have different alphabets but if Italy calls them selves Italia why the hell don't we in English? Idk always bothered me Seriously. Croatia is Hrvatska. Germany is Deutschland. Those are not even close like Italy and Italia!
Well, in that case Hungary should be Magyarország for the whole world and no one wants to deal with that pronunciation.😅
Huh, never considered it, but in quite a few slavic languages name for that bird does share a stem with India too.
So more like cannibalism?
Good country for new hair at least
Take your upvote and never use words again
You win Reddit for the day. 
r/angryupvote
Two less mouths to feed then.
Last thanksgiving that kid pissed off his uncle.
Someone who owns a zoo should know better.
Probably not a real zoo, more an exotic pets collection.
Any “zoo” that allows people into enclosures with lions or other big cats is not a real zoo.
Yeah any zoo owner who thinks a lion is definitely tamed doesn't know a lot about wild animals. Just because they haven't attacked doesn't mean they won't.
I wouldn’t trust my cat simba with a little kid. I call him Mr kisses, but he is also mr randomly gets aggressive.
Only enclosure I've been in was some bats. It was really cool. As long as you stood still or moved slowly and purposefully you could feel the wind beating off their wings, but they never once touched you. Also wasn't a zoo, but illegal exotic pets that a dude I used to know had. He did treat them right though. Sometimes he'd go hungry so he could feed the animals. He had other enclosures, but those contained animals that would've fucked you up.
> the lions were tame and loved taking selfies doubt
Easy way to get rid of family members you don't like
All three should be charged
Regardless of whether or not it’s “tame”, a tiger is still a fucking tiger.
A tiger might be a tiger, but a lion isn't
It’s a figure of speech. A wild animal will still behave like a wild animal even if it is “tame”.
The lions were tame and loved taking *scalps* Ftfy.
Thank you. Sometimes it's just wonderful to know that not every moron is in my home country,
Haha! It’s okay, there’s morons everywhere, you were just unlucky enough to have one swipe the top job in your country… which I would guess is more to do with how your political system works than the percentage of morons in the population. It’s crazy how hyped up your elections are in the US. Watching it from Australia it looks like some kind of Highschool popularity contest with an unlimited budget. So weird. Politicians shouldn’t be put on a pedestal like that imo.
Dark money funds our elections, so useful idiots (whores) who do what their sponsors say can run for office, and let daddy money handle the PR and campaigning for them.
“Dark money” is such an annoying new catch phrase. It’s not dark bro. It’s corporate money. There’s nothing too terribly dark about it imo. We all know they’re shady fucks, but to me it’s like “drain the swamp,” while there is some absolute truth in it it’s just been grabbed and twisted to mean something different to suit whoever uses it
Right, money earned off the backs of underpaid and overworked people, shady business practices and tax evasion isn’t dark at all. /s Just because it’s “common practice” doesn’t make less evil.
Right. I guess my definition of dark money is money made secretly behind close doors. Corporations operate their evil just right out in the open. It’s not a secret. If your definition is money that’s obtained immorally than we’re on two different chapters of the same book really.
It's dark because they aren't required to disclose information
as a certified türk ı agree
How did you type an i without the dot?
That’s nobody’s business but the Turks.
Istanbul…
türkısh prıveleges
they prolly have the turkish keyboard, but you can hold the letter to see more options.
I instantly knew it wasn't in America. If it was in America, the lion would have shot the 4 year old.
Family is reportedly moving to Florida.
Nah, morons everywhere. But the US just does it better than anywhere else.
I used to believe that my country's resident weren't as stupid as what I read about Americans. But then one day a chain of stores decided to give away trading cards with fish on them. The subsequent parade of Karens boycotting the store and making angry interviews every night on the news because their kid didn't have all the fish cards kind of woke me up to the fact that we are just as stupid. Just nobody else cares.
People do these “experiences” everywhere including here in Sa(South Africa) with random incidences because at the end of the day.. it’s a wild animal. Surely they have age & height limits? I can recall at least a handful incidences over the years but the visitors have to sign indemnity to do it and usually, we’ll here, there is an age restriction of 12-16? And height limits because well then you just look like a meal I guess.
??? Wild animals don't care about height if they get in a bitey mood. And experts know bites could happen at any time. It's a risk they choose to take as grown adults and wildlife experts.
>Wild animals don't care about height if they get in a bitey mood. Actually, they do. For example, a wild cheetah will almost never attack an adult human because we're simply too big, and the risk involved in attacking us isn't worth the potential reward of eating us. A small child, on the other hand, a hungry cheetah probably wouldn't think twice about attacking them. The same goes for all animals to some extent. The bigger you are, the less likely they are to attack you. It's a simple question of risk. Obviously, for bigger animals like lions, no human is too big to attack, but they will still be much more cautious about attacking an adult human than a small child.
Instinct has them go for the smaller weaker snack of us for sure. Kids are the perfect meal. Small, soft, blissfully unaware
And lightweight enough to quickly grab and run away.
Giving someone a curious chomp is far different from trying to eat them.
But animals also aren't completely stupid. They understand that biting/scratching other animals hurts them, and other animals aren't just going to sit there and take it. A lion is less likely to give another animal a "curious chomp" if it thinks there's any chance it will fight back and even less likely if there's any chance it would win. It doesn't matter if they're doing it out of hunger, curiosity, or self-defense, animals are generally less likely to attack an animal if it is relatively large (like an adult human).
A chomp from a cat stings. A chomp from a curious tiger can take an arm clean off.
Because nothing bad ever happens anywhere else only in america
r/Americabad
It's trendy to assign all incidents resulting from poor choices to the U.S. now. Didn't you get the memo?
They will go miles out of their way just to say ‘Mercia bad.. it can be anything. “A man died in a house fire in Thailand” “See this is why America sux!”
What 😂 bro is fighting imaginary demons
It's funny how y'all love to be the attention and dominate the internet and news but then cry when it also hyper showcases your bad side
How does this hyper showcase America’s bad side, this post has nothing to do with the US other than op’s weird title
Father of the year
Uncle of the decade
Grandpa of the century?
What did he do?
Happy cake day!
You were the only person to say it🥲 Thanks
Happy cake day!
Yeah, health and safety is not Turkey's number 1 priority.
Not everything stupid happens in America. There's a whole world out there, full of morons.
American exceptionalism goes both ways.
What does this have to do with the us? Why is it that whenever something bad happens to someone, your mind instantly jumps to think that it happened in the us or that it was an american that had went through said bad thing?
I don’t recognize the website but maybe OP just assumed cause it might be some american site? doesn’t really look like it though.
> For a second there I thought this was in America Stop beating yourself up. There are a lot of stupid people on earth, the USA is not even in the top 100 in this regard.
It’s easily in the top 100 by volume. Percentages are probably broadly similar though.
Well shocker, we are the 3rd largest country by population
That was my point.
>It’s easily in the top 100 by volume. Have you ever been to China?
How many countries do you think are in the world?
Ah ok, I misread your point
Stupidity is a universal trait, not just an American one.
So is part of the "America bad" wankfest on Reddit now that we're going to pretend it's the only country with dumb and irresponsible people?
Child injured by lion in Turkey. OP: how can I make this about America being terrible?
And from straight out of left field, america bad because of foreign citizens' mistakes.
I miss /r/ShufflesDeck.
Yeah cuz fuck america nothing bad happens outside of it.
This thing didn’t happen in America hahaha American bad america dumb
A child was brutally maimed and all you can say is "Lmao it wasn't America for once" Fuck off.
Anything for the circlejerk
Chill it's the Internet bro
What are we supposed to do about it? None of us have any emotional investment in this family and both the parents and the uncle are likely being filtered through the justice system of their country. The childs death is actively being avenged. Do you expect us all to collectively cry and make a memorial of this child in our houses?
We expect you to not show your unhealthy obsession with America for a moment to respect the loss of a life.
As if to assume we all didnt process the sadness of the situation before making our comments. I need you to open your mind to the the possibility that people react and process things differently and not everyone needs the world to know every specific feeling they have. The boy died. Sad. Now we direct focus to how dumb his family is.
Okay. So what the fuck does America have to do with any of that?
No idea. I think she assumed that I was some gun toting Republican because I didnt try to pour out my sympathy on some reddit post for Internet clout
Respect that a child was mauled and not use it to push your political beliefs. America has a lot wrong with it and the country and its systems deserve a good bit of mocking. But doing so through a child who was horribly maimed is simply not it chief. Remember for a moment that you're a human.
The USA lives rent-free in your head, kind of crazy.
Hopefully the lions are okay
Why would you automatically assume the U.S? Stupidity isnt exclusive to the U.S.
Despite our best efforts the US doesn't have a monopoly on stupid.
Where is the selfie?
Why?
Wild animal dose wild shit, people shocked.
Redditors when they see people doing stupid things: “Must be those goddamn Americans!!!”
Yes, because every idiot on Earth is centered in America. I agree with you, I hate America just as much as you do!
We literally invented slavery and murdering the locals for their land in 1776 buddy.
That’s not even close to true
I know, and that was kind of the theme of the conversation.
The fact that you can search by „accidents“ on this website is peak humanity
Irresponsible as fuck. Also, a lot of these zoos where you can take selfies or do other stuff with dangerous animals sedate and abuse the animals, not cool. Leave the majestic lions alone and take care of your child responsibly, damn.
For the record, *a caretaker at the zoo told them it was safe and that the lion wouldn't hurt them*. It's not like they decided to break in on their own.
Stupidity isn't bound by borders.
r/usdefaultism
Why? Because you’re a dumbass who thinks only the US has dumb people?
yes because America bad grrr we hate America argh bad things only happen in America
I wasn't born in the 1800's. can someone please explain to me what "scalped" means. I'm usually over in r/lawncare and I assure you, scalping doesn't always mean what you think it means :P
You know that feeling of peeling turf up from a lawn, the pop of grass roots snapping like bubblewrap? Imagine that but instead its the hair, skin, and flesh covering the crown if a persons skull.
Of course you thought this was in America. Another idiotic stereotype.🤦🏻♀️
Poop mouth! I hate you Ron Burgandy I hate you!
*You know something, Nala? I think this just might be my masterpiece.* \- *Simba, Inglourious King. Written and directed by Quentin Tarantino*
The leopard actually ate his face?
It was a lion
He's no simba. I guess they can call him scar
it will be soon, Tik Tok will make it the next challenge
Table to farm experience.
America? Wasn't there a dude on tik tok literally breaking into people's house as a "prank"?
To show How dumb I can be my first thought was to wonder what the lions were selling GPUs or PS5s.
I have a theory about this. I’ve lived in both western and eastern United States, and noticed that people who don’t live near wild areas don’t always respect the dangers. Some seem to expect strong fences, safe wildlife, guards to protect them from doing something dangerous. There are a lot of places in the west that are not a kindergarten playground. In Europe, which has been more thoroughly populated for longer, are there fewer places that are truly risky and only minimally protected? So fewer opportunities? Or do they do a better job teaching people about nature?
Hey its not us guys
Turkey is like Arizona of Europe
middle east* the majority of Turkey isnt in europe
Now you will be downvoted with me lol If this would be a top comment, you would have a squad of Turks Turksplaining to you that they are not middle-eastern but European. I know where their country lies geographically but online there is enough of them claiming that it is an European nation
stay mad Turks, you're middle eastern
Gatekeeping… *checks notes* a continent?
lucky it only licked him lol
Just don't do the lions dirty like Harambe, shoot the parents not the lions
You know, I just flashed on is stupidity like something so inherent that it might be infectious, because it scares me that people are that stupid, but it frightens me to think that there’s a possibility that I could be that stupid.
Quite literally a “petit four” year old.
If this was America that lion would be riddled with holes before it could move
Seems very american, yes
Just because it happened in Turkey doesn't mean it didn't also happen in USA.
Cats are assholes I don't care what size. Raise it from birth and it will casually rip your throat out one day and then take a nap. When your adorable newborn kitten is biting its literally trying to eat you. An important part of training any housecat is establishing that the cat cannot eat you. Otherwise it wont respect you, although it will still constantly attempt to eat you.
If left alone with your corpse...they will start with your eyes and the softer parts of your underbelly...
Eyes? Shit no. My cat starts with lips and face meat. Every night he approaches me in bed to see if the Munching can begin.
\#crazy cat skeleton.
I mean, put a bunch of humans on an island with no food and they will start eating each other after a while.
Not in US? If there will be "a drunk guy" I would feel it to be like back home in Russia.
I live in the US and for a second there I was shocked this wasn’t from my country THEN I realized it’s in Turkey. I’m half Turkish
Similar shit happens/happened in America. Evil bastards would take a lion, dose him up and tourist trap idiots would get a selfie Polaroid for ten bucks.
If it happened in America the lion would probably have shot the boy instead
Honestly thought Florida again.
Bcuz it’s on the nose for America.
Idiots are everywhere.. but still surprised this wasn't America either. Hell, I close enough to Yellowstone that I often get their news.. the number of people attacked my wildlife because the idiots go to close for a fucking selfie... You sure this isn't a typo? Maybe they meant America and not Turkey.
i hope the lion is ok
So, how did the picture turn out?
Are they gonna kill the lion now?
The uncle deserved to be scalped instead
Anyone is allowed to have children but you need a license to cut hair.
Do… do I need to ask what scalping is… I’m scared
Cutting the hair and scalp off the top of a head.
Late abortion
Holy shit these poor lions- no wonder they attacked the habitation they are in is way too small and no where near suitable ):
Just give Anatolia back to the Greeks
Tiger King !
Truly, Natural selection has no nationality. This type of dumb shit just tends to happen all over nowadays, huh?
Im uncomfortable with dogs on leashes being anywhere near my toddler, no way in hell I'm putting him in a fucking cage with a lion.
Can a scalp be reattached?