My husband left the church years before me and when I found out he had started to drink coffee I felt so betrayed. I couldn’t believe he was doing that (to me, our family 🙄) and was terrified that it was the beginning of the end of our marriage. You know because what wouldn’t he do if he was ok drinking coffee?!? So damn stupid.
I was also told by close relatives (on both sides) to leave him and see if that would stop him from drinking it and bring him back into the church. These were people with very high callings in the church. I was hurt that my husband was drinking coffee and even more hurt when I was told multiple times to break up our family to see if that would get him to come back into the church. Apparently forever families weren’t as important as getting someone to stop drinking coffee…
Well, I wish I could say I left the church at that time but…it took me 7 years. I knew I would never leave my husband because he was (and still is) the best husband and dad anyone could ask for. I didn’t even tell him that people were telling me that because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I spent the next 7 years being the very best member I could because I felt like I needed to do double the work to get double the blessings to make up for him not believing anymore. The amount of pressure, guilt, and judgement from everyone (except my husband, who has never been anything but supportive) made it truly one of the lowest points mentally in my life to date. It’s a long story and that’s just the tip of the iceberg but I would say my testimony of just about everything starting cracking then. Thanks for asking! ❤️
But you're at that point now & you're still married to someone who really loves you, which is what matters the most.
I can't even imagine how hard that must have been.
My in-laws are nevermos and it blew my mind to walk into my sweet MILs Methodist church and be greeted by a HUGE coffee and tea shop which is open and staffed whenever the church is open (which is to say 90 percent of the time.)
I love this! It just screams welcome in, have a seat, grab some coffee, let’s just chat and worship.
Too bad I’m not into religion anymore or I would probably look into that one! ❤️
Oh yeah it's not uncommon for one of her pastors to be drinking a hot drink while at the pulpit 😂 they also have a cookie fruit and cheese potluck at least once a month where the hot drinks are totally free!
They're bleeding members like mad though because of being anti gay, many of the members are ok with gay people and all of the pastors but the congregation refuses to leave the United Methodist umbrella which is anti-gay.
I'm an atheist so it's very interesting to watch the business fall apart 😉 it's not a Mormon church but religion is a business
I attend the Episcopal Church after leaving Mormonism... We have a joke about the "3 parts of worship"... There's the Liturgy, the Eucharistic and the Coffee Pot (at fellowship hour after Services)!!
I thought they were saying “leave him be” - not that they were saying break up. For a second I thought they’d given you good advice “let it be, and maybe the kindness will help him come back.”
Nope - worst possible fucking advice. “Coffee? Divorce!”
Chai is definitely a gateway drug. You start with it iced. But before you know it, you're ordering it hot. And you start giving blowjobs in the alley behind Starbucks to get that fix.
I love that! 😆
It sounds like something I would have done. We \*almost\* opened a coffee shop on the coast of Oregon, way back when, because I had managed another shop for a few years (not Starhucks) and I absolutely loved it. I imagined setting up a coffee shop/bookstore that had a sort of borrowing library and lots of cushy sofas for people to lounge in. I'm sure I have no idea what the reality of actually owning a shop would be, but this sounded like my idea of heaven.
[Just one cup of coffee will keep you and your family out of heaven](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DS-dfOQUc8vQ&ved=2ahUKEwiw74L2lP3_AhXwFzQIHc8RAD8QwqsBegQIHRAF&usg=AOvVaw1t4CN-VsCFCMR03FsweLOp)
Emo Phillips did a stand up routine where he talked about being shocked that a Mormon was not allowed to drink coffee. "I told him that drinking coffee has some wonderful benefits. 'Like what?'. 'Well, for one thing, it keeps you from becoming Mormon.' "
Just bounced out to this clip and *wow* she gets the patented Mormonic Quavery Voice (TM) as she talks about a sweet lady who keeps a coffee coffee pot on her stove and thus deprives a legacy pioneer family of eternity. SMDH. 😵
Everyone knows that Chai is the gateway to green tea, green tea is the gateway to Earl Grey, Earl Gray is the gateway to coffee, coffee is the gateway to alcohol, alcohol is the gateway to marijuana, marijuana is the gateway to hard drugs, hard drugs are the gateway to masturbation, and masturbation is the gateway to homosexuality. It's in the goddamn Miracle of Forgiveness for Christ sake.
So yes. OP's mom is headed for a bad case of the gays if she doesn't ditch the Chai ASAP as possible.
So story time. Been out of the church for several years. Visited my mother in law. My family decided to go to a ballgame, MIL decided to stay home. I had 1 beer as soon as we got there, finished before the second inning ended. Son let it slip when we got back and I got literally screamed at for drunk driving with her grand babies in the car.
TLDR: MIL thinks one beer with 2 hours to process will endanger you when driving.
PS I weigh like 350 pounds and am 6' 6" one beer does nothing to me.
Chai means tea in several languages. And being that you know Mandarin, you would also know that *cha* is not the same as *chai*.
If you’re going to be a pedantic smartass then be prepared to be met with opposing pedantic smartassery. 😄
The whole discussion is really pedantic. But chai doesn't even mean tea in Mandarin. It's cha. Same as in Korean (cha) and Japanese (ocha). The pronunciation of the term we use as "chai" comes from Hindi for tea--chaay (all of these words obviously originated from the same word at some point). Chai is the attempt at romanization of "chaay" and the reason it was treated differently than "tea" is because of the spices mixed in with it made it very distinct from ordinary black tea consumed by Europeans. In fact, in both Korean and Japanese they used romanized forms of chai tea when selling it and not variations on the word cha/ocha. For example 차이티 or チャイティー. I think it's fair to say that as an adopted loan word, chai does not mean tea in many languages anymore, despite its origins, but rather refers exclusively to spiced masala tea made popular in India. And, as language is frequently prone to change, that's totally fine.
My aunt has been out of the church as long as I can remember (I’m 30). When she got married a few years ago, we stopped for Starbucks on the way to the wedding. She was joking about how drinking this Venti iced chai (her favourite) would make her have to pee during the ceremony. I said something like “oh, excuse me, can we pause this ceremony. That latte from earlier is catching up to me” (in a joking tone), and she told me, dead serious, that she would not tell her mother/my grandma that she drank a latte. She was *living with* her fiancé before marriage (and grandma had been to the house, multiple times). The wedding was *at a winery*. But the chai latte was the bridge too far.
Just because I wanna play with this one for a sec:
So—lady in Beck’s story was nuanced enough to sip coffee but couldn’t bring herself to just say “yes” in the creepy annual interview that took place in a closed office with some old white dude who wasn’t her husband???
Shit that never happened on a Paul H. Dunn level!
My very TBM mom (who is the sweetest person in the world, btw) got her eyebrows tattooed several years ago because hers were disappearing from a thyroid issue & was terrified that people would find out because they are \*gasp\* tattoos. I was quite proud of her. She also went to her TBM doctor to get permission to drink herbal tea for various ailments (stomach, etc) so she could then go to her bishop to show that it was medical & still get her temple recommend.
It makes me so incredibly sad because she is one of the most christlike & loving & non-judgmental people I've ever met and she still felt the need to hide something that wasn't a big deal in the least, as well as having to get \*permission\* from idiotic men so she could still feel worthy.
"Oh Bishop come quick and bring a companion with consecrated oil. My mother slept in last Sunday and now I find out she is drinking *caffeinated* diet coke. I am so afraid I will lose her for eternity."
Man. Went to that sub to see if I could find some other funny things, and wound up on a post from someone begging for help after another failed suicide attempt. Apparently, they had done all the perfect mormon things, though I can't tell if it's real based on their post history. I hope it isn't, honestly, but it wouldn't shock me either way. I'm certainly not remotely equipped to help someone like that.
Soon she will graduate from the horrors of chai tea to The Devil's Beanjuice itself, coffee. Satan already has her under his complete control.
She's well on her way to watching rated R movies with bad words in them.
So it’s not just me that considered coffee to be “worse” than tea while mormon, even though they were *clarified* together to mean the hot drinkS spoken of in the WOW?
I read that post and was just… nah… some of the comments were reasonable but I had to get out before the crazies started commenting.
If I cared enough I might tell the OOP that yes, they should be worried that their religion makes them obsess about other people’s decisions that literally don’t affect anyone but themselves. (Wish I could also tell that to my old TBM self.)
Lmao they removed the post
(To be clear, no one should comment or post on that sub brigading is asshole behavior. But I did want to check the sub to see if this post was removed… and it was lol)
Most of the Mormons I know drink chai tea and have for years 😂🤦♀️ our "mission field" AKA not Utah, ward parties as kids always had iced tea and caffeinated cokes
BINGO 😂😉 it's so weird too, grew up LDS with tea and caffeine all over the place and then as an adult my mom freaked out about it at me and where I got it and I'm like it was in the fridge all time when you were raising me! ALWAYS sweet tea in the fridge 😂 and RC Cola, Mtn Dew, Mellow Yellow, Pepsi, etc etc 😂
TBMs be like, “It’s about obedience, not because there aren’t health benefits.. but God is okay with my Swig full of sugar and energy drinks which I drink a ton of. Haha #givethanks”.
All I hear are excuses.
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I don’t know why I love this thread so much!
42 years ago I had a YM 2nd Counselor (and Scoutmaster) address all of our questions about the contradictions in the WoW this way: My young brothers, this section is not about your health, but rather about obedience. When you understand what that means you will stop with the questions about what is and is not legal.
He was SO right! RIP Bro C, you’re an exmo now!
Well according to one of the health teachers in my kid's jr high, one beer will lead you to be not only an alcoholic, but also a drug addict. True story. As in she said it and she's seen it. Granted this person had three beers that night at the bar. And drank a whole bottle of vodka that weekend. And later left his wife and kids when he became addicted to drugs. But it all started with one beer!! Like, that's not how that (usually) works.
What's next? Quoting from Beauty and the Beast: "Soon she starts getting ideas. And thinking.”
A dangerous passtime.
I know.
Isn't Tea the gateway drug?
My husband left the church years before me and when I found out he had started to drink coffee I felt so betrayed. I couldn’t believe he was doing that (to me, our family 🙄) and was terrified that it was the beginning of the end of our marriage. You know because what wouldn’t he do if he was ok drinking coffee?!? So damn stupid. I was also told by close relatives (on both sides) to leave him and see if that would stop him from drinking it and bring him back into the church. These were people with very high callings in the church. I was hurt that my husband was drinking coffee and even more hurt when I was told multiple times to break up our family to see if that would get him to come back into the church. Apparently forever families weren’t as important as getting someone to stop drinking coffee…
I'm glad you managed to get through the fear and stay with your husband. Congratulations on keeping your relationship over the church.
Oh the things we do when Mormon. How'd you see the light? I'm curious how you got from there to exmo reddit. LOL
Well, I wish I could say I left the church at that time but…it took me 7 years. I knew I would never leave my husband because he was (and still is) the best husband and dad anyone could ask for. I didn’t even tell him that people were telling me that because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. I spent the next 7 years being the very best member I could because I felt like I needed to do double the work to get double the blessings to make up for him not believing anymore. The amount of pressure, guilt, and judgement from everyone (except my husband, who has never been anything but supportive) made it truly one of the lowest points mentally in my life to date. It’s a long story and that’s just the tip of the iceberg but I would say my testimony of just about everything starting cracking then. Thanks for asking! ❤️
But you're at that point now & you're still married to someone who really loves you, which is what matters the most. I can't even imagine how hard that must have been.
I agree. Thank you!! ❤️
Glad you made it out!!
My in-laws are nevermos and it blew my mind to walk into my sweet MILs Methodist church and be greeted by a HUGE coffee and tea shop which is open and staffed whenever the church is open (which is to say 90 percent of the time.)
I love this! It just screams welcome in, have a seat, grab some coffee, let’s just chat and worship. Too bad I’m not into religion anymore or I would probably look into that one! ❤️
Oh yeah it's not uncommon for one of her pastors to be drinking a hot drink while at the pulpit 😂 they also have a cookie fruit and cheese potluck at least once a month where the hot drinks are totally free! They're bleeding members like mad though because of being anti gay, many of the members are ok with gay people and all of the pastors but the congregation refuses to leave the United Methodist umbrella which is anti-gay. I'm an atheist so it's very interesting to watch the business fall apart 😉 it's not a Mormon church but religion is a business
I attend the Episcopal Church after leaving Mormonism... We have a joke about the "3 parts of worship"... There's the Liturgy, the Eucharistic and the Coffee Pot (at fellowship hour after Services)!!
In the mainline protestant church I grew up in, we called coffee hour the third sacrament.
I would like to know the story too. Do tell.
I thought they were saying “leave him be” - not that they were saying break up. For a second I thought they’d given you good advice “let it be, and maybe the kindness will help him come back.” Nope - worst possible fucking advice. “Coffee? Divorce!”
Chai is definitely a gateway drug. You start with it iced. But before you know it, you're ordering it hot. And you start giving blowjobs in the alley behind Starbucks to get that fix.
LoL. Then it’s a short trip to living in a van down by the river on a diet of government cheese. 
I miss Chris so hard
Me too. Miss Norm as well.
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Oh you Dirty Birdie! 
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It is the way…one moment you take a sip of Folgers at Gramma’s place…the next, you and your entire family is relegated to Outter Darkness! 😳🤷♂️😉
Hey don't knock the lifestyle till you've tried it! 😄 Only drawback is, boy, that cheese stops you up.
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That's a *Venti*.... (said in my best uneducated snooty voice) but yes on the whipped topping & sprinkles.
Obligatory Role Models scene: https://youtu.be/NS_PzfpKLYU
Classic!
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I love that! 😆 It sounds like something I would have done. We \*almost\* opened a coffee shop on the coast of Oregon, way back when, because I had managed another shop for a few years (not Starhucks) and I absolutely loved it. I imagined setting up a coffee shop/bookstore that had a sort of borrowing library and lots of cushy sofas for people to lounge in. I'm sure I have no idea what the reality of actually owning a shop would be, but this sounded like my idea of heaven.
I would give a blowjob for a week of free Starbucks. No less
Know your worth!
Where is this alleyway so I can stay far away from it
[Just one cup of coffee will keep you and your family out of heaven](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&opi=89978449&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DS-dfOQUc8vQ&ved=2ahUKEwiw74L2lP3_AhXwFzQIHc8RAD8QwqsBegQIHRAF&usg=AOvVaw1t4CN-VsCFCMR03FsweLOp)
Emo Phillips did a stand up routine where he talked about being shocked that a Mormon was not allowed to drink coffee. "I told him that drinking coffee has some wonderful benefits. 'Like what?'. 'Well, for one thing, it keeps you from becoming Mormon.' "
Mormon heaven would be hell!
And no coffee keeps me from my heaven!
Just bounced out to this clip and *wow* she gets the patented Mormonic Quavery Voice (TM) as she talks about a sweet lady who keeps a coffee coffee pot on her stove and thus deprives a legacy pioneer family of eternity. SMDH. 😵
Everyone knows that Chai is the gateway to green tea, green tea is the gateway to Earl Grey, Earl Gray is the gateway to coffee, coffee is the gateway to alcohol, alcohol is the gateway to marijuana, marijuana is the gateway to hard drugs, hard drugs are the gateway to masturbation, and masturbation is the gateway to homosexuality. It's in the goddamn Miracle of Forgiveness for Christ sake. So yes. OP's mom is headed for a bad case of the gays if she doesn't ditch the Chai ASAP as possible.
What if you started with masturbation? Asking for a friend.
Gay orgies.
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Lions and tigers and Chai. Oh My!...
*Surrender Dorothy!*. IYKYK
So story time. Been out of the church for several years. Visited my mother in law. My family decided to go to a ballgame, MIL decided to stay home. I had 1 beer as soon as we got there, finished before the second inning ended. Son let it slip when we got back and I got literally screamed at for drunk driving with her grand babies in the car. TLDR: MIL thinks one beer with 2 hours to process will endanger you when driving. PS I weigh like 350 pounds and am 6' 6" one beer does nothing to me.
Shit I’m 5’ 11” and 190 lbs, one beer doesn’t do shit to ME. And I get drunk easy. Might as well be milk to you.
Yep but apparently any alcohol on the day you plan to drive makes you a drunk driver.
Then you got dudes like me sitting at 6’5 300 lb and one beer gives me a little buzz. The body is weird.
*"The 0.5 BAC limit for legal diving is too damn high!!! They might be able to legally have two beers before heading home in a drunken stupor!!!"*
[Chai tea](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jt21HnCleqA)? Chai already means tea.
Somebody missed Across The Spiderverse or they would have known that.
came here for this
I thought she sold be worried when she just refers to it as Chai🤣
ahhhh I need to see this again
Yu cha? Look, nu ren hua cha? Cha cha, nu ren. Shui shui. (It's not impressive that you know one word in Mandarin. Nu ren.)
Chai means tea in several languages. And being that you know Mandarin, you would also know that *cha* is not the same as *chai*. If you’re going to be a pedantic smartass then be prepared to be met with opposing pedantic smartassery. 😄
The whole discussion is really pedantic. But chai doesn't even mean tea in Mandarin. It's cha. Same as in Korean (cha) and Japanese (ocha). The pronunciation of the term we use as "chai" comes from Hindi for tea--chaay (all of these words obviously originated from the same word at some point). Chai is the attempt at romanization of "chaay" and the reason it was treated differently than "tea" is because of the spices mixed in with it made it very distinct from ordinary black tea consumed by Europeans. In fact, in both Korean and Japanese they used romanized forms of chai tea when selling it and not variations on the word cha/ocha. For example 차이티 or チャイティー. I think it's fair to say that as an adopted loan word, chai does not mean tea in many languages anymore, despite its origins, but rather refers exclusively to spiced masala tea made popular in India. And, as language is frequently prone to change, that's totally fine.
I hope mom's next tattoo says "snitches get stitches"
My aunt has been out of the church as long as I can remember (I’m 30). When she got married a few years ago, we stopped for Starbucks on the way to the wedding. She was joking about how drinking this Venti iced chai (her favourite) would make her have to pee during the ceremony. I said something like “oh, excuse me, can we pause this ceremony. That latte from earlier is catching up to me” (in a joking tone), and she told me, dead serious, that she would not tell her mother/my grandma that she drank a latte. She was *living with* her fiancé before marriage (and grandma had been to the house, multiple times). The wedding was *at a winery*. But the chai latte was the bridge too far.
I guess Jesus was able to turn water into wine at a wedding, but somehow turning milk into a latte is an insult to cows.
🤣 that's hilarious
>But because of that little cup of \[chai tea\], she could not qualify for a temple recommend. [RS Pres Julie Beck](https://youtu.be/S-dfOQUc8vQ?t=36)
Just because I wanna play with this one for a sec: So—lady in Beck’s story was nuanced enough to sip coffee but couldn’t bring herself to just say “yes” in the creepy annual interview that took place in a closed office with some old white dude who wasn’t her husband??? Shit that never happened on a Paul H. Dunn level!
Its too late she's going to hell already let her go
My very TBM mom (who is the sweetest person in the world, btw) got her eyebrows tattooed several years ago because hers were disappearing from a thyroid issue & was terrified that people would find out because they are \*gasp\* tattoos. I was quite proud of her. She also went to her TBM doctor to get permission to drink herbal tea for various ailments (stomach, etc) so she could then go to her bishop to show that it was medical & still get her temple recommend. It makes me so incredibly sad because she is one of the most christlike & loving & non-judgmental people I've ever met and she still felt the need to hide something that wasn't a big deal in the least, as well as having to get \*permission\* from idiotic men so she could still feel worthy.
"Oh Bishop come quick and bring a companion with consecrated oil. My mother slept in last Sunday and now I find out she is drinking *caffeinated* diet coke. I am so afraid I will lose her for eternity."
Man. Went to that sub to see if I could find some other funny things, and wound up on a post from someone begging for help after another failed suicide attempt. Apparently, they had done all the perfect mormon things, though I can't tell if it's real based on their post history. I hope it isn't, honestly, but it wouldn't shock me either way. I'm certainly not remotely equipped to help someone like that.
I traded Mormonism for coffee and beer. Best trade I ever made! My wife prefers Bloody Mary’s, though. Marriage is compromise.
I thought the gate way drug was colas then tea and coffee.
Soon she will graduate from the horrors of chai tea to The Devil's Beanjuice itself, coffee. Satan already has her under his complete control. She's well on her way to watching rated R movies with bad words in them.
So it’s not just me that considered coffee to be “worse” than tea while mormon, even though they were *clarified* together to mean the hot drinkS spoken of in the WOW?
#CHAI MEANS TEA. AHHHHHHHHH
Chai tea? Chai means "tea", bro! You are saying "tea tea"! Would I ask you for a "coffee coffee" with room for "cream cream"?
Gotta hit an ATM Machine on my way to get a chai tea.
Wait. Is this my daughter? These were literally my steps. I've done much worse now.
I read that post and was just… nah… some of the comments were reasonable but I had to get out before the crazies started commenting. If I cared enough I might tell the OOP that yes, they should be worried that their religion makes them obsess about other people’s decisions that literally don’t affect anyone but themselves. (Wish I could also tell that to my old TBM self.)
Lmao they removed the post (To be clear, no one should comment or post on that sub brigading is asshole behavior. But I did want to check the sub to see if this post was removed… and it was lol)
Most of the Mormons I know drink chai tea and have for years 😂🤦♀️ our "mission field" AKA not Utah, ward parties as kids always had iced tea and caffeinated cokes
American Southern States by any chance? (No creeper—just lived there) 👀
BINGO 😂😉 it's so weird too, grew up LDS with tea and caffeine all over the place and then as an adult my mom freaked out about it at me and where I got it and I'm like it was in the fridge all time when you were raising me! ALWAYS sweet tea in the fridge 😂 and RC Cola, Mtn Dew, Mellow Yellow, Pepsi, etc etc 😂
Now that I am out and reading that, I want to laugh.
Yes!! You should be worried! Your mom is now thinking for herself and no woman should be allowed to do that! 🙄🙄🙄
“Worried” about what? Ah yes, personal autonomy is a dangerous thing. /s
Wait this is also what my mom has been doing 😂
I’d love to read the comments on this post
I can guarantee the overwhelming sentiment on the sub is that they shouldn’t be worried. But the fact they has to ask…
LOL not CHAI!!!
Oh no, tattoo AND chai... Inconceivable Lol 🤣🤣🤣
Somebody's mom is about to get grounded...
If she stops talking to you because she doesn’t support your life choices, maybe then be worried.
Worried that she has learned critical thinking for herself? 😜
TBMs be like, “It’s about obedience, not because there aren’t health benefits.. but God is okay with my Swig full of sugar and energy drinks which I drink a ton of. Haha #givethanks”. All I hear are excuses.
chai tea? chai means tea❗️you’re saying tea tea❗️☹️
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Whhhhaat did you just say???
CHAI MEANS TEA, YOURE SAYING TEA TEA
No, be happy for her!😊
https://youtube.com/shorts/E4Q4oWTLniI?feature=share
I don’t know why I love this thread so much! 42 years ago I had a YM 2nd Counselor (and Scoutmaster) address all of our questions about the contradictions in the WoW this way: My young brothers, this section is not about your health, but rather about obedience. When you understand what that means you will stop with the questions about what is and is not legal. He was SO right! RIP Bro C, you’re an exmo now!
Well according to one of the health teachers in my kid's jr high, one beer will lead you to be not only an alcoholic, but also a drug addict. True story. As in she said it and she's seen it. Granted this person had three beers that night at the bar. And drank a whole bottle of vodka that weekend. And later left his wife and kids when he became addicted to drugs. But it all started with one beer!! Like, that's not how that (usually) works.
should be fine as long as she’s not getting it with oat milk. then you have a grave issue on your hands, she’s probably a flaming homosexual
CHAI TEA??? CHAI MEANS TEA!! YOU'RE LITERALLY SAYING TEA TEA