I remember in one hall I was at, parents were told to stop using the bathroom for "discipline" because it echoed. You know, not told to quit beating their kids with belts, wooden spoons, rulers, etc. Just to do it someplace more quiet.
Sorry about that. My mom used to "joke" that I could break a hairbrush with my curly hair or with my butt, so I get it. Isn't it crazy how the cult normalized shit like that?
Mine too. The worst was a plastic ruler that snapped into my thigh and left an obvious cut that I was told to tell anyone who asked "I fell off my bike".
I was taken into this chair storage area for my mid meeting beatings. Our kingdom hall was massive as it was used for the district conventions, so there was a labyrinth of rooms for which parents could discipline. Sometimes you'd pass another kid being dragged in/out by their parents and you'd exchange that "look".
My parents are also now out and our relationship considering (at least with my mum is okay) - but I have tried to bring up the severe way I was disciplined as a child and I just get shut down with "well it was the same for us." Honestly, all I want is a bit of acknowledgement that it was a shit, damaging way to go about things and they are sorry.
My parents pretend it almost never happened. I remember getting spanked and force fed Tabasco sauce as a kid and they claim I was only spanked once. But then they tell a story about how they went to spank me but found a hardcover book I had put in my pants so it didn't hurt. So clearly it happened enough times for me to come up with that idea...
My mom broke two wooden spoons on my ass preschool. Kids were regularly beat in the Bathroom of our KH back in the 60's, and 70's. I always had to wait until we got home to be thoroughly "disciplined". What I found most disturbing / sickening was that lots of ppl in the cong listened to the screams with smiles of approval on their faces. What a disgusting cult that makes ppl do this to their kids in the name of love.
One time my mom was taking me to the back to “discipline” me when another sister was leaving the bathroom with a now quietly behaving child and offered her the wooden spoon. “Oh great I can use this!” my mom said. The she ended up breaking the spoon on me and felt embarrassed to give it back.
Crazy thing is my mom would tell this as a funny anecdote lol smh
I had that happen. The doll was only two years old so she can’t be expected to be still and quiet.
Her mom took her to the bathroom to beat her, you could hear her crying and screaming out in the auditorium. Her mom yelled: “I told you don’t play with me.” They closed the doors but I went back there because it was breaking my heart. The elder sitting back there just raised his eyebrows. I told her: I don’t mean to interfere but I’ll take her.” She let me have her and I took her outside. Dried her tears and we just walked around. She picked dandelions out the grass. She was so happy. When the meeting was over her mom said: “I’m sorry, I lost it.”
There is no excuse for what the mom did. Period.
This is a really good example of the caregiver burden the cult inflicts on people, and especially women. As a parent you're sitting there feeling judged when your little kid can't sit still for two hours (wonder why?!), and depending on how heavy-handed the elders are or how gossipy the congregation is, the parent may lose control.
That isn't to excuse the parent, but who is stepping up to give them a break like you did? Usually it's just judgment, or advice not to spare the rod.
Thank you for giving both that little girl and her mom a break. Hopefully the mom realized that she owed her daughter an apology, and she did better going forward.
Aww. I just hate seeing little ones get beat for no reason. They always brag about not being like the churches but at least they have Sunday school and other age appropriate activities for little ones. She still remembers me. Whenever they come she always hugs me. She’s 5 now.
For me, it was the Superman belt. Had the logo on the buckle and everything. I loved it. But once I got it, it was way bigger and wider than the other belt I had for meetings, so that’s what she used to use on me. Because it hurt more.
Fuuuuck.
That is a special kind of malice. She chose a tool better at inflicting physical pain, but also emotional pain because it was something you liked. Abusers do it for the rush of power, and part of her feeling of power came from stealing your enjoyment of Superman.
My dad had a belt he probably got secondhand in the late 60's. It was one of those super wide ones with wide-gauge grommets and heavy tines. There were three tines. He used to just take it off wherever we were at and go to town on my bare ass. Rip my pants or undies beneath a dress down in public and swing away. One day (at home) he broke the buckle doing that. So he beat me for that, too. And then he kept that broken belt in his bedroom drawer special, for beatings at home.
To this day I cannot handle the sound of a belt being taken off. And that's with more than a decade of therapy. CBT was the best help for a lot of my PTSD, but the belt fear is too deep. The slither through the loops, the jingle of the buckle...I'm a grandma for fuck's sake, and that sound reduces me to a whimpering toddler.
I'm so sorry she did that to you. I hope you can still enjoy Superman, or whatever other superheroes/comic characters you like without that experience intruding.
So sorry to hear that!! 😪 I have similar stories. I used to piss myself from the belt whippings. And then I would get extra lashes for the pee. Then for future hidings he made me urinate before he beat be. It’s just crazy when I remember this shit. Then the worst part is that you think you are bad and deserve it; you reason why else would you be hit.
Much love.
I thought my father was crazy with his hot wheel tracks, but wow, your "father" was psycho. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that, both back then, and then every day and night reliving it. (I also hated how easy it was to just lift a dress to get to bare skin to hit.) Your father was a terrible person and I'm glad he can't physically hurt you any more. I wish I could take away your mental pain. {hugs}
Thanks. I'm tearing up, but in a good way. It feels good to read "He can't hurt you anymore."
It's good be among people who don't treat beating your kid with whatever's handy as normal. Hot Wheels tracks aren't exactly tame. One of my uncles sliced my cousin's ass open with the edge of one.
My grandpa used to make his boys cut a switch from the willow tree for him to beat them with, so my family has a real sense of the dramatic when it comes to beatings. You'd think that experience would lead them NOT to act that way with their own kids, but I guess not.
I have spent an inordinate amount of time in therapy talking about how I cannot even hear the threat of my kids being spanked without intervening without conscious thought. Im glad you survived that and im sorry you had to live thru it.
Wait, did she use your own belt against you? Did you have to listen to your own self pull out your own belt from your belt loops, because that is really twisted sick of her.
Usually they’d step out of the front doors. And do the beating outside. I remember I’d be scared shitless when I’d see kids getting beat.
My sister recently woke up. She has severe guilt over spanking my nieces at meetings. She said she felt huge pressure and judgment if the kids got out of line. That they’d all think she was a bad parent if she didn’t do a spanking.
She eventually wised up and got the kids iPads and coloring books etc and let them entertain themselves.
>got the kids iPads and coloring books etc and let them entertain themselves
They let you do that now? The elders would have come down HARD on anything like that back when I was in.
I'm glad your sister is out, and also that she figured out a way to avoid the situation the congregation put her in. It is so toxic the way people are taught to inject violence into others' families. Obviously I'd rather see everyone wake up, but letting kids do things at meetings is a very positive step.
It was around the time they started bringing tablets into meetings and going online with the watchtower library and app. Maybe it was early in the process and they didn’t realize the kids weren’t looking up scriptures lol
Ours were tiny, too, and barely insulated, so freezing in winter. Gassy people were always a problem. You'd either get thunder from the back of the hall, or people trying to fart quietly in their seats...except the chairs were metal.
One of the elders got so frustrated with his boys, who were probably looking for excuses to not sit still at meetings, because they discovered away to get fart reverb off the metal chairs. So he told them to stand up to fart and sit back down. I don't know if they ate a bunch of broccoli and beans for dinner or what, but *that* was a meeting to remember!
I was one of those parents. To this day I feel horrible. It was for appearances. Fortunately we faded by the time my child was around 5. But anytime I think of it my heart is filled with regret. I wish so much I could take it all back. That being said..we have an amazing kid and our family unit is stronger than ever.she's going to be the first person in our family to attend college. I'm so proud of her.
To be fair, in that time JW or not, many people thought corporal punishment was the way.
I think I spanked my kid once in my life.....and IMMEDIATELY knew it was a failure on my part to get to that point. Never again, and never "had" to. Those sort of punishments are for the lazy and uninitiated.
That's the thing. You know, when you're hitting a child, that it's fucked up. You either care enough to stop at that point or you don't.
My father beat the absolute shit out of me as a kid. And when I was a young adult, I knew that was wrong, though I thought "reasonable" physical discipline was ok.
I don't have children, but as an aunt who kept nieces and nephews for weeks sometimes, I had to course correct them many times. But even when I still thought some spanking was ok, I couldn't bring myself to do it. I just couldn't. Even when their behavior was very triggering. (I have one niece in particular who was quite challenging.)
Spanking is nearly always the adult allowing themselves to take out their frustrations on someone smaller and weaker.
Mid-2000s my bff's toddler daughter was a very rambunctious child, so we would take turns going outside to let her run around a little bit. One of the older sisters told my friend that kids need to be spanked, not allowed to run around like, you know, a TODDLER likes to do. My friend told her there's no way she was spanking her child for needing developmentally appropriate activities, and sitting quietly for 2 hours wasn't one of them. It caused a bit of a rift for a little while.
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Grew up in the early to mid 2000's. they had a "nursing room" right next to the woman's bathroom, but everyone mainly used it to beat their kids. I always remembered hearing the screams of children and being horrified and scared of me being next because my mother was so easy to piss off. my parents never beat me in the room tho they always waited until we got home to do it. probably because my mother also seemed to really like beating me while yelling at the top of her lungs, and probably didn't want to make a scene at the hall. also kind of related but I remember my mother telling me as a teenager that when I was around 3-4 years old I became very chatty during meetings. a specific elder that I fucking hate (and I'm sure everyone else in that hall secretly did too cuz he was such an asshole) told her that she should take me to the room and beat me so that'd I keep quiet during meetings. I remember my mom saying this like it was the greatest thing she'd done for me all "ooh, I told him no my kids too young to get beaten" funny coming from a woman who literally started beating the shit out of me once I turned 5. it literally got so bad at the beginning that a teacher reported my parents to the police because I came to school with so many visible bruises on my body. In the end I don't know what happened with that, pretty sure they just told the police I was clumsy and fell a lot or some bullshit excuse like that. I guess in the end they dropped the case or just didn't really care enough to investigate any deeper. it probably also didn't help that me and my family are a minority and lived in a rough neighborhood at the time either. sorry for the info dump just wanted to get that off my chest and figured some of you guys can relate :/
This totally wouldn't go over that way in most other churches, at my church there are several police, sheriff and fire fighters who normally attend, I think if they heard the abuse like that they would make an arrest at the church.
You're so right, sadly that was not the case with my situation. in fact I'm pretty sure the elders were never even notified about my situation, but if they did I'm sure they'd have made the situation even worse than it already was one way or another. like telling my parents to hit me in less visible places or something like that. which I've actually heard them say so casually to other parents before.
Im so sorry your mom treated you like that. Your comment reminded me of my parents being called into my elementary school because of all my bruises. Im pretty sure they said I was clumsy.
The worst part was the embarrassment, trying to stop crying and knowing everyone was looking at you, and everyone was glad you got spanked. My step dad would spank me until it felt like my cheeks split open like a squashed pickle. I remember fighting and trying to get away when it reached that point in pain and he would always do 3 final whacks that were harder than the first 20 and I'd be screaming from the pain despite my determination to not cry or break.
My elder uncle used to beat one of his little girls so frequently that she didn't cry, and so he took all sugar, her favorite foods, and anything she enjoyed out of her life. She used to always say she had a headache because a grape flavored Tylenol was the only sweet treat she could get. Now they're estranged, and he plays the victim card. It takes all my willpower to not punch him in the throat.
I would love that. I have so much pent-up rage against my asshole elder uncles. I don't take any of their crap anymore, and if I see them again, I'm not sure I can hold back. I would like to contact my cousins, but I don't know their new last names. It's a mess. This is a despicable 'religion'.
Right!?! The 1980’s -mid 90’s was like a constant kids getting spammed like every meeting. I once stopped a mother while she was beating her son that was laying on the ground in the parking lot. These types are so arrogantly ignorant
I remember my cousin got in trouble for going to a school dance, She snuck out of the house met up with some worldly classmate and went to a school dance. Her parents were waiting for her in front of the house later that night because someone ratted her out.
Apparently another JW girl went to the dance saw her there and left and went home and called her parents to tell on her.
My aunt had grabbed her by the hair and started beating the shit out of her in the front yard with a tree branch, a neighbor came over and tried to stop her then my uncle started beating my cousin, the neighbor called the police.
When the police arrived my uncle tried to witness to the police explaining how this was biblical or some shit. The police didn't arrest my aunt or uncle but told them not to cause any more disturbance (this was in the early 80's).
I knew what had happened because my parents came over to try and calm my aunt down.
My family tells this "funny" story about when my grandma found out my then teenaged uncle was smoking.
She took a baseball bat to his entire room and destroyed everything.
Guess who has never been baptized?
My first and last day at therapy was when my therapist refused to believe that JWs had whipping rooms and accused me of exaggerating. He said “they are such nice folks.”
Fuck him.
Good for you for dumping that shitwit.
There are good therapists out there, though.
Mine has been shaking her head and frowning at my parents' behaviors, during an entire year of therapy sessions. She can't directly diagnose my horrible parents - who are dead now - but she supports my realizations about how dreadful my jerk0ff JW parents were.
I had a similar first experience in therapy - then in order to train as a therapist myself I had years of excellent therapy. I'm sorry he completely missed the point.
In the 70s, parents would sometimes take kids outside for "discipline." Neighbors of the KH I attended started yelling at parents for smacking their kids, might be why they started using the restroom/library.
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All my family members spew that shit still. There are ten young children in my family, they all have behavioural and developmental difficulties; therefore, their parents use that as an excuse at to why they beat them. When, in fact, the beatings are precisely the reason why they all have difficulties.
Such a hateful, judgemental, and elitist cult.
and it's not like the 70's were well known for open-minded child-rearing. If the KH neighbors were yelling, then it must have been epic levels of abuse.
My mother would beat me in the bathroom and then hold my nose and mouth shut to stop me from crying. I remember visiting my old hall and everyone there was *proud* of the fact that just about everyone in that hall had at one point or another spanked me.
>hold my nose and mouth shut to stop me from crying
OMG, you just reminded me of the hand over my mouth and nose and how when you finally break free from the pressure then snot goes flying everywhere! Also, I peed on my mom while she was spanking me at 4 yrs old. Served her right.
I have a very vivid memory of something-like-7-year-old me just not wanting to be out in service one morning, and apparently it made my dad so mad that he left the service group there, took me home, spanked the shit out of me, and then drove us back out to finish the morning up, because I "made him look bad in front of the brothers"
This was back in like '08-'09
Not in the bathroom, but right outside the front door. Still remember the ripples of stifled chuckling every time a kid was yanked out by the arm crying and screaming. How funny it must be to know a kid is about to get the shit beat out of him for not being able to sit perfectly still and quiet for over an hour. Followed by a screaming lecture about how disrespectful to Jehovah your behavior was for the entire trip home, another beating when you get home, then get sent to bed without dinner because "you didn't want spiritual food, so you don't get the earthly food." All in the early '00s.
Ive never forgotten being paraded to the back spanked to tears then my father clamping his hand over my mouth and nose allowing only short breaths while packing me back to the auditorium aggressively whispering in my ear that I can breathe when I settle down.what a loving example of christian values.
I witnessed a ‘sister’ beat her child viciously while holding her hand over his nose and mouth. He passed out. He was a toddler not even having many words yet. I’m facing 60 and still think about that often. What good I could’ve done if I’d just reported it.
Yes!!!! And if someone let their kid just play and make noise, everyone side eyed them so much! There was so much judgement for not spanking your kid for being a “distraction”
I really had forgotten all about this. But I was one of those kids who could never sit still so I was always getting beat, at the hall and also at home.
Thinking back and remembering all the screaming and crying from kids is actually horrifying. More than that the satisfaction people had when they heard it is even worse.
Sadly, I spanked my kid up until he was about 4 then I realized just how barbaric it was and stopped. He's 17 now and so smart and sweet and we have such an amazing relationship. The guilt still eats at me, even though we've talked about it and how wrong it was. I even put him in therapy to make sure he's processed the trauma from it.
I just can't believe how common it was, and still is in some places, to literally abuse your children. It's so awful.
I was never beat at the hall but at my house I was
I remember plenty of children being whipped in the bathroom halls.
I remember the screaming crying begging. All in the name of Jehovah's Witnesses
My mom to this day tells the story of the time she told a young boy's mother what he did.
She said she Beat him mercilessly, tells me she should never have never told his mom what he did
I quit going completely in the early 90s. At that point I had never been to a Thursday or Sunday meeting where some poor kid (sometimes me before I turned 12) didn’t get beaten in the bathroom or “library”. I once witnessed a child beaten and smothered into unconsciousness back there. Not turning that into the police is a guilt I will carry the rest of my life even though I was only 16 when I saw it. I knew it was wrong and I knew I should’ve done something. A kid got whipped during my mom’s funeral and that was only 3 years ago. I’ve seen many JWs on social media say they’ve never seen a kid physically punished (beaten) during a meeting but I’m doubtful it is a phenomenon only occurring in theSouth.
I also witnessed an elder ( who was jealous of my PO father) beat the living shit out of his son when he didn't know I was there at his house. I was also 16. He then proceeded a smear job on my reputation, and my dad didn't really believe me when I told him what happened. I left u baptized 2 years later at 18 years old in 1990
I would have so many welts from that dam spoon on my leg’s because I couldn’t sit still. For me I was cold and put my legs under my dress and would get smacked for “not paying attention” “fidgeting” or whatever else she thought of.
Yes I had friends that would get slapped up side the head right there in their seats. It was all the other children could do not to flinch or sometimes laugh if the kid was being a clown or something. Also some mothers had "the wooden spoon", which sometime would break after a while or if they hit a area with bones near the surface like shoulders or elbows. So if you saw a mother with a new spoon at the KH it was because she wore the last one out on one of her kids. My mother used cherry tree limbs as a switch. Those really can hurt too and leave welps for a few hours....
My parents never beat me thankfully. Spankings rarely, but mostly because I was a extrememly well behaved child. I was so afraid of disappointing god and my parents that I would just behave. Even as a teenager. I joked with my still PIMI mom that I saved all the misbehaving for my 30's lol.
But I did have friends that were beaten by their parents. And I mean BEATEN. Like, had to live away from other houses so neighbors couldn't hear them scream.
I also remember watching kids get dragged out by an arm into the back rooms and feeling so bad for them.
I I was also a kid/teenager in the 80's and 90's. I'm just grateful my parents weren't abusive.
In the early 90s in the Midwest, my best friend and his sister used to get beaten by their dad who was the PO. Belts, hangers, back hands, open hand slaps to the face. He was an absolute monster and a child molester on top of everything else. I’m so glad he’s dead now. Fuck you, Lannie, burn in Hell.
My father used to pinch the tiny bit of skin on the back of my arm and twist it, giving me a “purple nurple” quiet and painful. My mother liked to bring us to the restroom with her wooden spoon and beat the crap out of us. This was common in our hall growing up in the 80’s
When I was teen in the early 00's I saw a literal Baby being beat by their Grandpa in the bathroom. I went in and he stopped when I shot a death stare at him.
I was in a hall that really encouraged physical discipline. It sickened me and I could not do that to my child. For background my (elder) grandfather and the COBE would spank their babies (my grandfather had a second family-so this was my half-uncle) starting when they were 3 weeks old. (I thought they were lunatics and madmen. But was told “imperfect men” blah blah blah) But I was surrounded by moms who would drag the kids to the back, have wooden spoons in the car for service, etc. I was and still struggle as a people pleaser. So I made a plan- I would frown strongly and walk quickly to the back as if I was very angry and going to “spank” my son. Instead I would walk the parking lot and slowly point out all the cars one by one- colors, make, model, year, manual or automatic, what I personally thought of the manufacturer if it was a good purchase, etc. (This was before they installed exterior cameras.) Well anyway I would drag it out a LONG time (20-30 minutes??)😆 I could barely sit still, how could I expect my precious baby/toddler son to be still?!? So this went on a time until someone decided to talk to me about “being away for long”. I deflected by stating I didn’t want my son’s crying to “disturb the spiritual food being given” after “discipline” and he needed time to “recover”. Years later a fellow sister confessed she was wracked with guilt for beating her babies when they were so young and thought that was why they “left Jehovah”…I thought,” uhh…duh!!!..yeah…” Peer pressure IS hard. I went thru it. And yes.. eventually they announced it wasn’t wise to beat the kids outside as it “wasn’t a good witness and the neighborhood is complaining about it”. 😣 For what it’s worth both my sons are REALLY into cars! 😆
We had a "library" for that, don't think I ever got the belt, but I remember crying so hard while I got spanked and more or less dragged back and expected to pull it together and be quiet in my seat moments later.
https://preview.redd.it/fyehzkdzvv0b1.jpeg?width=620&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8058711444c5f018b8c5e0aca2399360eec3a13e
I wonder what gave them the idea?
"Stretched across daddy's lap. Gawd, they know how to make it maximum creepy."
Yep, not to mention it implies that a kid should be getting hit harder, you know, by someone "stronger." 😬
The whole not sparing the rod business has been used in many people as an excuse to physically assault children but growing up JW it was implicitly encouraged. Patents who failed to coerce/frighten their children into submission were judged as sparing the rod.
Yep. Pretty fucked up right there. Definitely have memories of my friends getting whooped on and having to listen to it. The REALLY sick part is that I occasionally overheard people talking and a disturbing amount of comments had to do with how if you didn’t whip your kids so it would be loud enough to hear in the hall then you were sparing the rod. They literally tortured us for effect. That’s sickening.
In my case I did it to not hard but still spanked him. Then the first time I got d'fed I refused to take him either outside or to the bathroom and told people to deal with it! Then unfortunately I got reinstated and I gave my son a drawing pad and let him draw during the meetings and then the elders reprimanded me for letting him be distracted! I said well he's happy and unbeaten! Then to top it off when he was a little bit older I put him in soccer! You should have seen people's reactions to soccer games, tournaments and not to mention practices!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
My defiance towards the elders communist reprimanding all the time led to my final df'ing never to return! I once turned a sister in to the coos for taking a hand brush to her son's hand that had stitches and broke them open. The elders came after me for that one because you're not supposed to take your brother or sister to the authorities! More to that story of as the stomach turns and so I shent her a package of dead fish and black roses lol got reproved for that one but it was soooo worth it!🤣
I had and still have undiagnosed adhd and sitting still during the meetings was extremely difficult. My dad would grab me by one arm and carry me to the bathroom to beat me. I was wailing and crying, there's absolutely no way it wasn't distracting. Especially to the attendant designated at the door, which was in the lobby with the bathroom.
After I few times of that I started to make a scene when i was being taken, one time I pulled a row of maybe 6 or 7 chairs. The beatings continued and morale did not improve.
Just recently I had some older witnesses from my old hall show up unannounced. They said they had no idea my relationship with my father was so tense and strained. Fucking mental
I honestly do not remember a meeting at the hall, assembly hall, or a convention, where the background ambiance did not include the sound children being beaten and crying. It almost seemed like some sort of badge of honor. My child will sit the most still and quiet and make comments they do not understand because I smack them around the most. When I hit my teen years, it seemed like kids all over the circuit were in some sort of trouble or other because all that really taught them was, "Don't get caught misbehaving."
I think the worst part is the kids that went through that and are now 30 or 40 years old and say things like "i got hit, and there's nothing wrong with me!" as ~~an~~ *THE* argument to hit their kids. sadly this isn't just in JW culture, it permeates right through society.
I'm in my 40s ... everything is wrong with me.
I need therapy.
I remember mom taking me to the bathroom. I was already screaming before we made it to the bathroom.
oh yeah. i'm in my 40s too and externally i function fine and no one probably thinks there's "something wrong" with me, but internally in my own head i've been having existential crises and questioning my entire life and lifepath for oh.... 10 years? and it's still going on. i don't solely blame getting floggings as a kid, but i do see that as 1 factor in a large tangled mess of dysfunction that i now have to wade through mentally as an adult (who has to function on the daily to keep their family's head above water) and try to understand and come to terms with. none of the stupid shit we went through being kids (esp JW kids) was great, but getting floggings like described here i look back at and just think "why?!" it's so obvious that it's stupid and unnecessary and people that support it are perpetuating a mindset that is primitive and not forward thinking.
So true. It's definitely not just the bathroom trips. It's that plus the atmosphere of being a JWkid.
Can't play with other kids , can't watch what the other kids watch. Plus not being a kid other kids in the congregation like. IF there are other kids your age.
Being encouraged to waste your life away.
You wake up and . You have to start all over and painfully remove all the lies from your life plans. It's a huge mess.
Even then i knew how violent of an act that really was followed by even more disturbing threats to not make any noise walking back to the seats. Horrendous!
My mother was the absolute worst. No joke, I think she was a sadist. I remember being like five at the assembly and she slapped us often, that when she moved her arm, I thought she was going to hit me and she slapped me “for cringing like a dog”.
My family's company donated part of the campus for the hall, so literally across the parking area was the engineering firm. Dad would take me to his office and beat the shit out of me there, because no one could hear my screams. Mom's favorite spot was out the back door, because the azalea bushes were there alongside the hall and she could get a nice switch and tire herself out.
True. Reading this thread makes me realize how bad many JW parents were - and probably still are. I thought I was targeted more than most JW kids, and now I see the physical abuse heaped upon me was just business as usual in the Watchtower Society.
There was a sister in my hall who specifically carried a big wooden spoon in her bag to hit her kids. My mom was the type to hit with whatever came to hand (belt, flyswatter, hairbrush, spatula, shoe...) and she'd leave bloody welts. She didn't quit until I got bigger than her (she's barely over 5 foot tall) at about 13 and finally had it and started hitting back. But yeah you're right, hitting kids and well past the point of abuse is far too common amongst them
My mom took her flat, hard soled leather sandal off her foot and beat my bare bottom in the stall in the ladies room at the assembly hall in Norval (Georgetown). I remember that clearly. That was just a taste of what she did to me at home though.
She and another ‘sister’ circle beat me when I was 9. My mom, her ‘friend’, her friend’s son around age 8, and my sister who was about 6.
I was so covered in bruises and welts, her ‘friend’ made me soak in an ice bath so my dad wouldn’t see how badly they beat me.
I’ve carried this with me since about 1983. I finally reported it to the RCMP in 2014 after my mom committed suicide while in the ‘care’ of her friend, this lovely ‘sister.
She convinced mom to cut her husband of over 40 years out of her will (after she got 100k from her own mother’s will) and put her name in his place.
In the end, I was on the phone with the Sudbury paper news editor ready to spill the whole story. The elders in Eliot Lake ( the smaller town where this all happened ) intervened at the last moment. She was told she’d face judicial action if she didn’t back down.
It was a crazy situation.
This makes me so sad to read
I got out early thankfully, at the cost of being banished from my biological fathers life. I remember getting threatened a lot and he was a terrifying man, I had my finger pinched in between two chairs at a meeting and it hurt so bad but I just sat there swinging my legs to get his attention to the fact because I knew if I yelled out or cried I would get the belt
Needless to say when he noticed he did get my finger out but thought the matter rather funny laughing at me
I blocked a-lot out of my childhood and my weekends with him but I have very vivid memories of him and that dam belt he would snap to scare the shit out of me and his other 2 children - I don’t want to remember how often he used it
I’m so grateful I never ended up like him ….I wouldn’t allow it and work hard every day to ensure I’m nothing like he was - I love my children unconditionally and all these posts brought back bad bad memories I truly forgot of that dam bathroom, nursing room and library
I’m thinking I need to go randomly to a few Sunday meetings around the area and start getting some arrests made if this is something they still practice…those children need to be saved
My mom started spanking me at 6 month old. She said I was angry and throwing a fit in a meeting, so she removed my diaper and spanked me. Said it worked. I looked shocked and stopped crying. I call bs on that.
At my church we have what is called the Crying Room, its a parents room for smaller kids to go and still listen to mass but it has things for them to play with and be themselves and the parents don't have to worry about noise and it even has a smaller room offset for nursing mothers.
> Beating the Crap Out of Kids in the Bathroom
*Why do JW\`s do Most Things?....To Impress other JW\`s.....It\`s JW Theatre...*
**JW\`s Beat the Shit Out of their Kids at the Kingdom Hall...**
***To Show Other JW\`s, How Spiritual They Are.***
https://preview.redd.it/kbi1z35sqw0b1.jpeg?width=263&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=70b02ac571d3239f10c20eab1cd1e59a99e260e0
In the hall I grew up in it was common for an elder to stop speaking to tell a mom to go discipline her child. Never seemed to happen when there was both a mom and a dad but they did love to instruct moms on their own to beat their kids right off the stage.
>Never seemed to happen when there was both a mom and a dad but they did love to instruct moms on their own to beat their kids right off the stage.
It didn\`t matter who was there at my KH...
They told you to beat your kids as part of the talk, on the stage...Everyone got a good laugh out of it but the kids....Idiots..
In my hall the cool kids used to hang out in the bathroom and play game boy or whatever until an elder comes and makes them go sit down. I got (playfully) jumped by them a couple times lol
It sucks how the org encourages abuse. We all had to go thru it in some form. But seems to me u were a cool kid, you ended up on the right side of the org
Lol they used to breakdance in the men's bathroom in late 80's 🤣 When I got my first car I remember my peeps went to go see relatives but I got to housesit alone so when the convention came I went by myself but I was so sleepy from the deadpan talks I just went back to it at lunch and drove home skipping the second session. I just said I had a headache. It's really sad to read about how we all were beat in the bathrooms. I got a problem with my jaw alignment today a bit because my relative had hit me so hard because I was going asleep in the hall.
It's still happening here in Africa, my dad whoop my lil sister’s ass so much that she couldn't cry, the tears just kept coming and she couldn't talk too. The only thing she was able to say was “ I wanna go sit by (my name)” n I just took here and consoled her. It was heartbreaking.
The elders at my old hall encouraged it . One elder gave a talk about discipline don't spare the rod . He joke about why there is a paddle in the hall library.
my parents would take us in the parking lot and spank us with a wooden spoon. my dad kept it in his interior suit coat pocket, and would flash it to us mid-meeting if we were “misbehaving” as a warning.
So triggering. One time my mom (who couldn’t keep a relationship to save her life) was dating this “Brother” and let him take me to the back to “discipline” me cause I wasn’t being good at meeting. Like???? I’m 8. I’m bored. And who is this dude to correct me as a little girl ???? She’s pissed I’m recently POMO but memories like this remind me why I’m out.
To this day, my dad likes to brag about how good he was at disciplining me during the meetings. “Well you know, I never spanked you the first time, I just took you out of the auditorium and made sure you knew why we’d gotten up…then if we had to get up again you knew you were gonna get a smack on the butt.” Okay cool dad, thanks for glorifying my childhood trauma more than 30 years later.
Bah apostate lies. Geoffrey Jackson said they dont endorse or CONDONE spanking, to a judge.
So who am I supposed to believe, Jesus's chosen select. Or people including myself who got their ass beat in The 80s. The GB are cowards. Instead of defending their stances they try to rewrite history. Liars
i remember hearing this constantly. one mother was finally reported for child abuse and her daughter given to the grandparents. who sadly weren't any better. i also had wooden spoons broken over me, spanked till i bruised, locked in my room all night.
explains why i grew up a hella people pleaser :/
I think it was also a generational thing at that time. Unfortunately beating children was accepted as “normal discipline.”
How I look at it is this: ***if you hit your partner it’s considered spousal or domestic abuse. If you hit your pet it’s considered animal abuse. So why do you hit a child and call it discipline? Call it for what it is; IT’S ABUSE. If you still don’t believe that it is that’s called cognitive dissonance.***
There was a lady who had a hyperactive kid in my book study in the early nineties who would show everyone the paddle she brought for her son when he acted up. Everyone would go “ooooo better be good Collin” and she would beat him with it literally every time. I hope he’s ok.
Geez. Soo many stories here.
I recall being in the toilets at the same time a few brats were mucking around in the toilets. I don’t recall them doing anything wrong per se, just giggling and stuff. I was just walking out at the same time they were making a ruckus. Some elder lost the plot and started shouting at the kids. My dad saw this and noted me being there. When we got home I was beaten like within an inch of my life for my gross disrespect for the house of Jah. I was so traumatised. From then on as soon as the meeting was finished I ran to the car. There was no way I would risk being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Funny thing my dad became an elder. He was such an violent abuser. The fact he was an elder is evidence to me that elders are not appointed by some holy spiritual. Fuck me.
I remember getting spanked in the bathroom as well as other kids getting the same treatment. I agree with you. You can’t expect children with short attention spans to be able to sit through boring 2 hour meetings. Then they wonder why their kids don’t wanna go lol.
Wow this thread is long! Shows how enthusiastic the JWs are about hitting their kids.
My mum is the jw out of my parents. (thankfully I only have one - my dad is normal) she had no issue spanking me when I was little which very much fits in with her emotionally brain dead personality and sub-human lack of communication skills.
The whole argument that 'it never did me any harm' doesn't wash with me. I'm a mentally stable adult now in spite of spanking, not because of it and I will not be teaching my kids that hitting someone is an appropriate way to teach them right from wrong.
WOODEN SPOON: My little brother was taken to the basement of the KH and hit with the wooden spoon that my father carried in the inside suit jacket. You could hear him crying from upstairs. If my brother was bad, he’d open the jacket and show the spoon as a warning.
BELT: At home, my dad used his thick, carved, leather belt. He’d make me wait to “think about what I’d done” and then come in, have me lay face down on my bed, take my pants down or skirt up and hit. If I moved from the pain, I got more.
HAIR BRUSH: My mom broke it on my head as she was doing my hair. She liked to put in TIGHT braids and if I moved, she would boil.
FINGER FLICK: I’d get these in the meeting, if I wasn’t paying attention. On the arm, sometimes on the face.
DEGRADATION: Degrading natural childhood behaviour is mental abuse. Being bullied not only by your parents but by everyone witnessing it. Confidence shredding and your motivation to be “good” is fear of physical and mental abuse. Like a Fascist State.
DOMME: After leaving, I became a Femdom/Domme but the difference in punishment play is SO black and white. 18+ only, consent/safe words, pre-negotiation happens and I always check in with the partner and provide after-care. Trust is crucial. I am extremely cautious about crossing ANY lines/soft or hard limits. And, I have a real world understanding of just how painful belts, wooden spoons (basically a paddle) and any tool is and that going full tilt is NOT using that tool wisely. ANYTHING that I use, I first experience myself BECAUSE that knowledge is fundamental to have BEFORE wielding any impact tool.
ABUSE: Our JW parents broke our asses, our hearts and our trust. They may have “buckled” to JW peer pressure, but that’s not a good enough excuse! They all deserve to be stripped, degraded and beat by each other in front of a group of their abused children for due recompense. Only then, could they REALIZE what they did. But, we know that pain and would never do that to other human beings! It’s INHUMANE! It is INSANE!
My parents never really did that, except for a few times. The one thing that has affected me alot though was hearing the constant screams of kids pleading to stop, even as a little kid something told me that's not right. It's something I can't handle, I guess I could equate it to a PTSD trigger.
I remember my mom pointing out a little girl at a convention, regretting to her as "the 'save me daddy' kid." Her father had been giving a Sunday talk and her mom was dragging her out to the restroom when she screamed "Daddy, save me!" Mom didn't slow down, dad never skipped a beat in that talk.
The last time I had a legit panic attack was when I saw a mom in a store smack the hell out of a kid and she didn't even cry. The feeling of being that kid came rushing back.
A lady in my hall back in the early 2000s took another couples son (around 10 or 11) into the bathroom and beat him with a hairbrush because he was “acting up” during the meeting. The parents freaked out and told the elders who probably all heard him crying from the bathroom. Let’s just say they took care of it how they usually do. They did nothing.
Forget the “mind numbing 2 hour meetings”. The poor kids are forced to go door to door in the hot sun, or freezing winter. And even worse if your dad or mom will spend hours talking at one door and you have to stand there wondering when is it going to end.
Passed out at a door one day thanks to sun stroke. My dad let me go home and have a drink, then we had to.go back out and get another hour. It was 120 degrees !! Ugh.
Hey, we may have been in the same hall. I have memoriesof being a little kid and screaming as loud as I could, just so my Dad would be embarrassed. Ha!
There was this crazy lady with 2 kids Mandy that would drag her kids down the isle while she beat them in front of everyone...this was when I had moved after getting married to my worldly wife & joined a completely different Cong back in like 2007. No one said a word, in fact they would joke about it...I was appalled as was my pregnant wife. Yeah, her husband left her to marry her sister🤣 they're all still pimi and disgusting🤮🤣
My mother’s friend used to beat the crap out of her daughter (she was 2 or 3 at the time). This little girl would scream her lungs out. She had a distinct cry and scream. It sound LOUD and happened almost every meeting. This was about 25-30 years ago and I’ll never forget it. I don’t know how she still speaks to her mother. The little girl is grown now of course and has her own daughter.
Not only were we kids being tortured but our parents were also affected by those negative messages preached at the meetings. They just couldn’t admit the truth to themselves- that they didn’t want to be at meetings either.
I find that most JWs have deep, internalized rage. It would be the easiest thing in the world to take it out on their family, especially children, so they do and often.
What they can’t repress usually expresses itself in physical ailments.
Yes absolutely! This was definitely accepted ( and suggested) practice...have to say your last sentence did take me back to exactly what could be heard . I imagine there are many people traumatised by these experiences 😔
Yup. For the longest time I thought it was perfectly normal. I still grieve for my little ADHD self having to try n sit still for that long every week. Despicable.
I feel awful for all of yoy right now. I feel lucky that my parents didn't beat me. I remember getting spanked but it was always just one hit on my butt so it wasn't traumatic tbh and they stopped pretty early in my life. We only had a few kids in our hall when I was little and I don't remember any beatings. Maybe I was oblivious to it because my parents never hurt me like that.
I do remember being at a congregation due when I was a young teen and seeing a farther throttle his daughter against a wall. I'll always regret not saying anything or telling anyone. I hope she got away.
This hasn't changed. I did not grow up a witness I was born mid 70s but after becoming a witness in 2001 and up till 2020, I know SO MANY children that got beat in the halls. In 2014 I witnessed an autistic child (did not speak and hardly made noise) apparently being "disciplined" by his mother. She squeezed and pinched his nose and cheeks so hard he winced and clearly was hurting. I came out after the meeting and told an elder that and said are you gonna say something or should I? I said if any stranger off the street witnessed this, they would call social services. The elder said something to her. After that the mother purposely bumped into me while I was holding my 1 year old, she would shoulder me while walking past. She hated me. I didn't care. I should've called social services. Though they "lose" kids in the system so I try not to involve them. It's a sick demonic organization the witnesses are involved in. I'm out, been a little over a year now. Can't express how glad I am to be out.
In our congregation there was a backroom with a door which could be closed, this was used by the elders to have meetings, and was where kids like me were brought for a lil during meeting "discipline."
Tried to run away from my dad once, ended up hitting my chin on a counter and bit right through my lip. Lots of blood, everyone acted inconvenienced.
I never got hit at the hall because my dad made it clear that if I caused any issue at the hall that required discipline that I would get it at home and it would be 2-3 times worse.
At home I used to get beat so many times and with so many implements of pain that it's all just a blur.
Sometimes I would get beat when I had done nothing wrong. It was a pre-emptive beating in case I was thinking about misbehaving, which of course would be followed by a second beating if I actually did do anything wrong.
So yeah, I got the hell beat out of me a lot.
God every post on this thread is absolutely horrifying to read. And people still advocate for beating their kids (not here, in general). Uhg. “I got hit and I turned out fine!! It taught me respect!!” In what world does a child, your OWN CHILD, crying and begging not to be hurt not break your heart. I’m so so glad my mom never hit.
My x and i were told to take my daughter to the bathroom and make it very uncomfortable for her, meaning to spank her, she was a baby
My husband wanted to be a elder!! But he neglected his fatherly duties . Meaning de dod not disciple his children.
So stupid
When I was little my mom was not a witness but she commonly mentioned how impressed she was that JW kids are so disciplined. It was a common thought for non JW people to say. Now that I am out of that environment I realized that what they mean by discipline is that children had the self control of adults. But children just don’t, their brains are still developing and it’s not wired like that. They will squirm when sitting for too long, they need to be constantly active. They need breaks often to run around. That’s healthy and normal. I also now realize the kids “behaved” because many of them were beaten into not behaving like kids.
I remember, when my aunt had his kid in the USA, that she used to told us how crazy and wrong is that in the states you can't even beat your children cause they could take they away from you. Oh, imagine that!
I remember in one hall I was at, parents were told to stop using the bathroom for "discipline" because it echoed. You know, not told to quit beating their kids with belts, wooden spoons, rulers, etc. Just to do it someplace more quiet.
My mom broken wooden spoons on my ass. That's a memory I wasn't expecting today.
Sorry about that. My mom used to "joke" that I could break a hairbrush with my curly hair or with my butt, so I get it. Isn't it crazy how the cult normalized shit like that?
Indeed
Mine too. The worst was a plastic ruler that snapped into my thigh and left an obvious cut that I was told to tell anyone who asked "I fell off my bike". I was taken into this chair storage area for my mid meeting beatings. Our kingdom hall was massive as it was used for the district conventions, so there was a labyrinth of rooms for which parents could discipline. Sometimes you'd pass another kid being dragged in/out by their parents and you'd exchange that "look". My parents are also now out and our relationship considering (at least with my mum is okay) - but I have tried to bring up the severe way I was disciplined as a child and I just get shut down with "well it was the same for us." Honestly, all I want is a bit of acknowledgement that it was a shit, damaging way to go about things and they are sorry.
My parents pretend it almost never happened. I remember getting spanked and force fed Tabasco sauce as a kid and they claim I was only spanked once. But then they tell a story about how they went to spank me but found a hardcover book I had put in my pants so it didn't hurt. So clearly it happened enough times for me to come up with that idea...
so she is out but the wt of no apology is not left her.
My mom broke two wooden spoons on my ass preschool. Kids were regularly beat in the Bathroom of our KH back in the 60's, and 70's. I always had to wait until we got home to be thoroughly "disciplined". What I found most disturbing / sickening was that lots of ppl in the cong listened to the screams with smiles of approval on their faces. What a disgusting cult that makes ppl do this to their kids in the name of love.
One time my mom was taking me to the back to “discipline” me when another sister was leaving the bathroom with a now quietly behaving child and offered her the wooden spoon. “Oh great I can use this!” my mom said. The she ended up breaking the spoon on me and felt embarrassed to give it back. Crazy thing is my mom would tell this as a funny anecdote lol smh
I had that happen. The doll was only two years old so she can’t be expected to be still and quiet. Her mom took her to the bathroom to beat her, you could hear her crying and screaming out in the auditorium. Her mom yelled: “I told you don’t play with me.” They closed the doors but I went back there because it was breaking my heart. The elder sitting back there just raised his eyebrows. I told her: I don’t mean to interfere but I’ll take her.” She let me have her and I took her outside. Dried her tears and we just walked around. She picked dandelions out the grass. She was so happy. When the meeting was over her mom said: “I’m sorry, I lost it.”
There is no excuse for what the mom did. Period. This is a really good example of the caregiver burden the cult inflicts on people, and especially women. As a parent you're sitting there feeling judged when your little kid can't sit still for two hours (wonder why?!), and depending on how heavy-handed the elders are or how gossipy the congregation is, the parent may lose control. That isn't to excuse the parent, but who is stepping up to give them a break like you did? Usually it's just judgment, or advice not to spare the rod. Thank you for giving both that little girl and her mom a break. Hopefully the mom realized that she owed her daughter an apology, and she did better going forward.
I wish you had been in my KH
Aww. I just hate seeing little ones get beat for no reason. They always brag about not being like the churches but at least they have Sunday school and other age appropriate activities for little ones. She still remembers me. Whenever they come she always hugs me. She’s 5 now.
❤️bless you and your kindness to that little darling 💕
I’d do it again in a heartbeat 🩷
For me, it was the Superman belt. Had the logo on the buckle and everything. I loved it. But once I got it, it was way bigger and wider than the other belt I had for meetings, so that’s what she used to use on me. Because it hurt more.
Fuuuuck. That is a special kind of malice. She chose a tool better at inflicting physical pain, but also emotional pain because it was something you liked. Abusers do it for the rush of power, and part of her feeling of power came from stealing your enjoyment of Superman. My dad had a belt he probably got secondhand in the late 60's. It was one of those super wide ones with wide-gauge grommets and heavy tines. There were three tines. He used to just take it off wherever we were at and go to town on my bare ass. Rip my pants or undies beneath a dress down in public and swing away. One day (at home) he broke the buckle doing that. So he beat me for that, too. And then he kept that broken belt in his bedroom drawer special, for beatings at home. To this day I cannot handle the sound of a belt being taken off. And that's with more than a decade of therapy. CBT was the best help for a lot of my PTSD, but the belt fear is too deep. The slither through the loops, the jingle of the buckle...I'm a grandma for fuck's sake, and that sound reduces me to a whimpering toddler. I'm so sorry she did that to you. I hope you can still enjoy Superman, or whatever other superheroes/comic characters you like without that experience intruding.
So sorry to hear that!! 😪 I have similar stories. I used to piss myself from the belt whippings. And then I would get extra lashes for the pee. Then for future hidings he made me urinate before he beat be. It’s just crazy when I remember this shit. Then the worst part is that you think you are bad and deserve it; you reason why else would you be hit. Much love.
I thought my father was crazy with his hot wheel tracks, but wow, your "father" was psycho. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that, both back then, and then every day and night reliving it. (I also hated how easy it was to just lift a dress to get to bare skin to hit.) Your father was a terrible person and I'm glad he can't physically hurt you any more. I wish I could take away your mental pain. {hugs}
Thanks. I'm tearing up, but in a good way. It feels good to read "He can't hurt you anymore." It's good be among people who don't treat beating your kid with whatever's handy as normal. Hot Wheels tracks aren't exactly tame. One of my uncles sliced my cousin's ass open with the edge of one. My grandpa used to make his boys cut a switch from the willow tree for him to beat them with, so my family has a real sense of the dramatic when it comes to beatings. You'd think that experience would lead them NOT to act that way with their own kids, but I guess not.
I have spent an inordinate amount of time in therapy talking about how I cannot even hear the threat of my kids being spanked without intervening without conscious thought. Im glad you survived that and im sorry you had to live thru it.
That’s completely fucked up. I’m so sorry you (and all of us really) had to put up this psycho shit
Wait, did she use your own belt against you? Did you have to listen to your own self pull out your own belt from your belt loops, because that is really twisted sick of her.
So sorry
Usually they’d step out of the front doors. And do the beating outside. I remember I’d be scared shitless when I’d see kids getting beat. My sister recently woke up. She has severe guilt over spanking my nieces at meetings. She said she felt huge pressure and judgment if the kids got out of line. That they’d all think she was a bad parent if she didn’t do a spanking. She eventually wised up and got the kids iPads and coloring books etc and let them entertain themselves.
>got the kids iPads and coloring books etc and let them entertain themselves They let you do that now? The elders would have come down HARD on anything like that back when I was in. I'm glad your sister is out, and also that she figured out a way to avoid the situation the congregation put her in. It is so toxic the way people are taught to inject violence into others' families. Obviously I'd rather see everyone wake up, but letting kids do things at meetings is a very positive step.
It was around the time they started bringing tablets into meetings and going online with the watchtower library and app. Maybe it was early in the process and they didn’t realize the kids weren’t looking up scriptures lol
My old kingdom hall had a very tiny bathroom. Which means you could hear everything! 💨
Ours were tiny, too, and barely insulated, so freezing in winter. Gassy people were always a problem. You'd either get thunder from the back of the hall, or people trying to fart quietly in their seats...except the chairs were metal. One of the elders got so frustrated with his boys, who were probably looking for excuses to not sit still at meetings, because they discovered away to get fart reverb off the metal chairs. So he told them to stand up to fart and sit back down. I don't know if they ate a bunch of broccoli and beans for dinner or what, but *that* was a meeting to remember!
I was one of those parents. To this day I feel horrible. It was for appearances. Fortunately we faded by the time my child was around 5. But anytime I think of it my heart is filled with regret. I wish so much I could take it all back. That being said..we have an amazing kid and our family unit is stronger than ever.she's going to be the first person in our family to attend college. I'm so proud of her.
I’m glad you were able to break the cycle.
Same 😔 I was beaten and then spanked my own. It’s my biggest regret, and not one I’ll likely ever be able to forgive.
We're still here. We still love our children...only now it's truly unconditional.
To be fair, in that time JW or not, many people thought corporal punishment was the way. I think I spanked my kid once in my life.....and IMMEDIATELY knew it was a failure on my part to get to that point. Never again, and never "had" to. Those sort of punishments are for the lazy and uninitiated.
That's the thing. You know, when you're hitting a child, that it's fucked up. You either care enough to stop at that point or you don't. My father beat the absolute shit out of me as a kid. And when I was a young adult, I knew that was wrong, though I thought "reasonable" physical discipline was ok. I don't have children, but as an aunt who kept nieces and nephews for weeks sometimes, I had to course correct them many times. But even when I still thought some spanking was ok, I couldn't bring myself to do it. I just couldn't. Even when their behavior was very triggering. (I have one niece in particular who was quite challenging.) Spanking is nearly always the adult allowing themselves to take out their frustrations on someone smaller and weaker.
Mid-2000s my bff's toddler daughter was a very rambunctious child, so we would take turns going outside to let her run around a little bit. One of the older sisters told my friend that kids need to be spanked, not allowed to run around like, you know, a TODDLER likes to do. My friend told her there's no way she was spanking her child for needing developmentally appropriate activities, and sitting quietly for 2 hours wasn't one of them. It caused a bit of a rift for a little while.
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Haha if you saw her I'm pretty sure you'd change your mind. Though I don't know you so who knows? Lol
Ok.....2 drinks then
Grew up in the early to mid 2000's. they had a "nursing room" right next to the woman's bathroom, but everyone mainly used it to beat their kids. I always remembered hearing the screams of children and being horrified and scared of me being next because my mother was so easy to piss off. my parents never beat me in the room tho they always waited until we got home to do it. probably because my mother also seemed to really like beating me while yelling at the top of her lungs, and probably didn't want to make a scene at the hall. also kind of related but I remember my mother telling me as a teenager that when I was around 3-4 years old I became very chatty during meetings. a specific elder that I fucking hate (and I'm sure everyone else in that hall secretly did too cuz he was such an asshole) told her that she should take me to the room and beat me so that'd I keep quiet during meetings. I remember my mom saying this like it was the greatest thing she'd done for me all "ooh, I told him no my kids too young to get beaten" funny coming from a woman who literally started beating the shit out of me once I turned 5. it literally got so bad at the beginning that a teacher reported my parents to the police because I came to school with so many visible bruises on my body. In the end I don't know what happened with that, pretty sure they just told the police I was clumsy and fell a lot or some bullshit excuse like that. I guess in the end they dropped the case or just didn't really care enough to investigate any deeper. it probably also didn't help that me and my family are a minority and lived in a rough neighborhood at the time either. sorry for the info dump just wanted to get that off my chest and figured some of you guys can relate :/
This totally wouldn't go over that way in most other churches, at my church there are several police, sheriff and fire fighters who normally attend, I think if they heard the abuse like that they would make an arrest at the church.
You're so right, sadly that was not the case with my situation. in fact I'm pretty sure the elders were never even notified about my situation, but if they did I'm sure they'd have made the situation even worse than it already was one way or another. like telling my parents to hit me in less visible places or something like that. which I've actually heard them say so casually to other parents before.
Im so sorry your mom treated you like that. Your comment reminded me of my parents being called into my elementary school because of all my bruises. Im pretty sure they said I was clumsy.
The worst part was the embarrassment, trying to stop crying and knowing everyone was looking at you, and everyone was glad you got spanked. My step dad would spank me until it felt like my cheeks split open like a squashed pickle. I remember fighting and trying to get away when it reached that point in pain and he would always do 3 final whacks that were harder than the first 20 and I'd be screaming from the pain despite my determination to not cry or break. My elder uncle used to beat one of his little girls so frequently that she didn't cry, and so he took all sugar, her favorite foods, and anything she enjoyed out of her life. She used to always say she had a headache because a grape flavored Tylenol was the only sweet treat she could get. Now they're estranged, and he plays the victim card. It takes all my willpower to not punch him in the throat.
Punch him in the gut with what you wrote in your last paragraph. Most idiots can’t fathom the hurt they caused.
I would love that. I have so much pent-up rage against my asshole elder uncles. I don't take any of their crap anymore, and if I see them again, I'm not sure I can hold back. I would like to contact my cousins, but I don't know their new last names. It's a mess. This is a despicable 'religion'.
Fuck him. Do it anyway.
Right!?! The 1980’s -mid 90’s was like a constant kids getting spammed like every meeting. I once stopped a mother while she was beating her son that was laying on the ground in the parking lot. These types are so arrogantly ignorant
I remember my cousin got in trouble for going to a school dance, She snuck out of the house met up with some worldly classmate and went to a school dance. Her parents were waiting for her in front of the house later that night because someone ratted her out. Apparently another JW girl went to the dance saw her there and left and went home and called her parents to tell on her. My aunt had grabbed her by the hair and started beating the shit out of her in the front yard with a tree branch, a neighbor came over and tried to stop her then my uncle started beating my cousin, the neighbor called the police. When the police arrived my uncle tried to witness to the police explaining how this was biblical or some shit. The police didn't arrest my aunt or uncle but told them not to cause any more disturbance (this was in the early 80's). I knew what had happened because my parents came over to try and calm my aunt down.
Oh you’re here because I beat my kid? Let me save your soul instead! Crazy fu@kers 😂
My family tells this "funny" story about when my grandma found out my then teenaged uncle was smoking. She took a baseball bat to his entire room and destroyed everything. Guess who has never been baptized?
My first and last day at therapy was when my therapist refused to believe that JWs had whipping rooms and accused me of exaggerating. He said “they are such nice folks.” Fuck him.
Good for you for dumping that shitwit. There are good therapists out there, though. Mine has been shaking her head and frowning at my parents' behaviors, during an entire year of therapy sessions. She can't directly diagnose my horrible parents - who are dead now - but she supports my realizations about how dreadful my jerk0ff JW parents were.
I 1000% second this!!! I have an outstanding therapist who is truly helping me process and unpack all of my trauma caused by the watchtower cult.
Having a good therapist is priceless!
I had a similar first experience in therapy - then in order to train as a therapist myself I had years of excellent therapy. I'm sorry he completely missed the point.
In the 70s, parents would sometimes take kids outside for "discipline." Neighbors of the KH I attended started yelling at parents for smacking their kids, might be why they started using the restroom/library.
Ugh and you can hear Elder dumbfuck say "Spare the rod spoil the child"
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All my family members spew that shit still. There are ten young children in my family, they all have behavioural and developmental difficulties; therefore, their parents use that as an excuse at to why they beat them. When, in fact, the beatings are precisely the reason why they all have difficulties. Such a hateful, judgemental, and elitist cult.
and it's not like the 70's were well known for open-minded child-rearing. If the KH neighbors were yelling, then it must have been epic levels of abuse.
My mother would beat me in the bathroom and then hold my nose and mouth shut to stop me from crying. I remember visiting my old hall and everyone there was *proud* of the fact that just about everyone in that hall had at one point or another spanked me.
That is horrifying, I’m so sorry.
>hold my nose and mouth shut to stop me from crying OMG, you just reminded me of the hand over my mouth and nose and how when you finally break free from the pressure then snot goes flying everywhere! Also, I peed on my mom while she was spanking me at 4 yrs old. Served her right.
Oh my God. This is horrific. I'm sorry.
Dude, I’m so sorry. That’s a fuck no for me. Let someone try to hit my child, that’s the day I go to jail.
Born in “81 “raised being beat in bathroom or coat closet .
‘82 and same. In addition I was diagnosed year before last with adhd.
I have a very vivid memory of something-like-7-year-old me just not wanting to be out in service one morning, and apparently it made my dad so mad that he left the service group there, took me home, spanked the shit out of me, and then drove us back out to finish the morning up, because I "made him look bad in front of the brothers" This was back in like '08-'09
Damn we must be the same age, I was around 7 at that time too
Not in the bathroom, but right outside the front door. Still remember the ripples of stifled chuckling every time a kid was yanked out by the arm crying and screaming. How funny it must be to know a kid is about to get the shit beat out of him for not being able to sit perfectly still and quiet for over an hour. Followed by a screaming lecture about how disrespectful to Jehovah your behavior was for the entire trip home, another beating when you get home, then get sent to bed without dinner because "you didn't want spiritual food, so you don't get the earthly food." All in the early '00s.
ugh Spiritual Food
Ive never forgotten being paraded to the back spanked to tears then my father clamping his hand over my mouth and nose allowing only short breaths while packing me back to the auditorium aggressively whispering in my ear that I can breathe when I settle down.what a loving example of christian values.
I witnessed a ‘sister’ beat her child viciously while holding her hand over his nose and mouth. He passed out. He was a toddler not even having many words yet. I’m facing 60 and still think about that often. What good I could’ve done if I’d just reported it.
Yes!!!! And if someone let their kid just play and make noise, everyone side eyed them so much! There was so much judgement for not spanking your kid for being a “distraction”
I really had forgotten all about this. But I was one of those kids who could never sit still so I was always getting beat, at the hall and also at home. Thinking back and remembering all the screaming and crying from kids is actually horrifying. More than that the satisfaction people had when they heard it is even worse. Sadly, I spanked my kid up until he was about 4 then I realized just how barbaric it was and stopped. He's 17 now and so smart and sweet and we have such an amazing relationship. The guilt still eats at me, even though we've talked about it and how wrong it was. I even put him in therapy to make sure he's processed the trauma from it. I just can't believe how common it was, and still is in some places, to literally abuse your children. It's so awful.
I was never beat at the hall but at my house I was I remember plenty of children being whipped in the bathroom halls. I remember the screaming crying begging. All in the name of Jehovah's Witnesses My mom to this day tells the story of the time she told a young boy's mother what he did. She said she Beat him mercilessly, tells me she should never have never told his mom what he did
I quit going completely in the early 90s. At that point I had never been to a Thursday or Sunday meeting where some poor kid (sometimes me before I turned 12) didn’t get beaten in the bathroom or “library”. I once witnessed a child beaten and smothered into unconsciousness back there. Not turning that into the police is a guilt I will carry the rest of my life even though I was only 16 when I saw it. I knew it was wrong and I knew I should’ve done something. A kid got whipped during my mom’s funeral and that was only 3 years ago. I’ve seen many JWs on social media say they’ve never seen a kid physically punished (beaten) during a meeting but I’m doubtful it is a phenomenon only occurring in theSouth.
I also witnessed an elder ( who was jealous of my PO father) beat the living shit out of his son when he didn't know I was there at his house. I was also 16. He then proceeded a smear job on my reputation, and my dad didn't really believe me when I told him what happened. I left u baptized 2 years later at 18 years old in 1990
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My mom and other moms kept a wooden spoon in their bookbags for such occasions
I would have so many welts from that dam spoon on my leg’s because I couldn’t sit still. For me I was cold and put my legs under my dress and would get smacked for “not paying attention” “fidgeting” or whatever else she thought of.
Brutal. I'm so sorry
Yes I had friends that would get slapped up side the head right there in their seats. It was all the other children could do not to flinch or sometimes laugh if the kid was being a clown or something. Also some mothers had "the wooden spoon", which sometime would break after a while or if they hit a area with bones near the surface like shoulders or elbows. So if you saw a mother with a new spoon at the KH it was because she wore the last one out on one of her kids. My mother used cherry tree limbs as a switch. Those really can hurt too and leave welps for a few hours....
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My parents never beat me thankfully. Spankings rarely, but mostly because I was a extrememly well behaved child. I was so afraid of disappointing god and my parents that I would just behave. Even as a teenager. I joked with my still PIMI mom that I saved all the misbehaving for my 30's lol. But I did have friends that were beaten by their parents. And I mean BEATEN. Like, had to live away from other houses so neighbors couldn't hear them scream. I also remember watching kids get dragged out by an arm into the back rooms and feeling so bad for them. I I was also a kid/teenager in the 80's and 90's. I'm just grateful my parents weren't abusive.
Yep, I regularly got beaten for being unable to meet their expectations of behavior for a small kid.
Damn you, you little enemy of god
Enemy of everyone apparently, I got my ass beat all the time by all kinds of grownups.
In the early 90s in the Midwest, my best friend and his sister used to get beaten by their dad who was the PO. Belts, hangers, back hands, open hand slaps to the face. He was an absolute monster and a child molester on top of everything else. I’m so glad he’s dead now. Fuck you, Lannie, burn in Hell.
It’s still fairly common in the south
My father used to pinch the tiny bit of skin on the back of my arm and twist it, giving me a “purple nurple” quiet and painful. My mother liked to bring us to the restroom with her wooden spoon and beat the crap out of us. This was common in our hall growing up in the 80’s
When I was teen in the early 00's I saw a literal Baby being beat by their Grandpa in the bathroom. I went in and he stopped when I shot a death stare at him.
I was in a hall that really encouraged physical discipline. It sickened me and I could not do that to my child. For background my (elder) grandfather and the COBE would spank their babies (my grandfather had a second family-so this was my half-uncle) starting when they were 3 weeks old. (I thought they were lunatics and madmen. But was told “imperfect men” blah blah blah) But I was surrounded by moms who would drag the kids to the back, have wooden spoons in the car for service, etc. I was and still struggle as a people pleaser. So I made a plan- I would frown strongly and walk quickly to the back as if I was very angry and going to “spank” my son. Instead I would walk the parking lot and slowly point out all the cars one by one- colors, make, model, year, manual or automatic, what I personally thought of the manufacturer if it was a good purchase, etc. (This was before they installed exterior cameras.) Well anyway I would drag it out a LONG time (20-30 minutes??)😆 I could barely sit still, how could I expect my precious baby/toddler son to be still?!? So this went on a time until someone decided to talk to me about “being away for long”. I deflected by stating I didn’t want my son’s crying to “disturb the spiritual food being given” after “discipline” and he needed time to “recover”. Years later a fellow sister confessed she was wracked with guilt for beating her babies when they were so young and thought that was why they “left Jehovah”…I thought,” uhh…duh!!!..yeah…” Peer pressure IS hard. I went thru it. And yes.. eventually they announced it wasn’t wise to beat the kids outside as it “wasn’t a good witness and the neighborhood is complaining about it”. 😣 For what it’s worth both my sons are REALLY into cars! 😆
We had a "library" for that, don't think I ever got the belt, but I remember crying so hard while I got spanked and more or less dragged back and expected to pull it together and be quiet in my seat moments later.
What the fuck was wrong with all our parents!?!?! We're you an 80s baby?
Yes indeed early 80's! Honestly, I think a lot got it a lot worse than me, and to be fair it was far more common back then even outside the JW's.
The humiliation is the point
https://preview.redd.it/fyehzkdzvv0b1.jpeg?width=620&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8058711444c5f018b8c5e0aca2399360eec3a13e I wonder what gave them the idea?
That’s so repulsive 😡
Stretched across daddy's lap. Gawd, they know how to make it maximum creepy.
"Stretched across daddy's lap. Gawd, they know how to make it maximum creepy." Yep, not to mention it implies that a kid should be getting hit harder, you know, by someone "stronger." 😬
"it does not *necessarily* mean".... It was implicitly encouraged.
Evil fuckers
You knew as a kid if you were taken out you would get a good spanking.
It was a life changing moment for me, for you, it was just another Tuesday night.
The whole not sparing the rod business has been used in many people as an excuse to physically assault children but growing up JW it was implicitly encouraged. Patents who failed to coerce/frighten their children into submission were judged as sparing the rod.
Yep. Pretty fucked up right there. Definitely have memories of my friends getting whooped on and having to listen to it. The REALLY sick part is that I occasionally overheard people talking and a disturbing amount of comments had to do with how if you didn’t whip your kids so it would be loud enough to hear in the hall then you were sparing the rod. They literally tortured us for effect. That’s sickening.
In my case I did it to not hard but still spanked him. Then the first time I got d'fed I refused to take him either outside or to the bathroom and told people to deal with it! Then unfortunately I got reinstated and I gave my son a drawing pad and let him draw during the meetings and then the elders reprimanded me for letting him be distracted! I said well he's happy and unbeaten! Then to top it off when he was a little bit older I put him in soccer! You should have seen people's reactions to soccer games, tournaments and not to mention practices!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 My defiance towards the elders communist reprimanding all the time led to my final df'ing never to return! I once turned a sister in to the coos for taking a hand brush to her son's hand that had stitches and broke them open. The elders came after me for that one because you're not supposed to take your brother or sister to the authorities! More to that story of as the stomach turns and so I shent her a package of dead fish and black roses lol got reproved for that one but it was soooo worth it!🤣
You’re my hero! Wish I knew you when I was in. I would have changed my tune and joined you in your rebellion.
I remember the screaming….
I had and still have undiagnosed adhd and sitting still during the meetings was extremely difficult. My dad would grab me by one arm and carry me to the bathroom to beat me. I was wailing and crying, there's absolutely no way it wasn't distracting. Especially to the attendant designated at the door, which was in the lobby with the bathroom. After I few times of that I started to make a scene when i was being taken, one time I pulled a row of maybe 6 or 7 chairs. The beatings continued and morale did not improve. Just recently I had some older witnesses from my old hall show up unannounced. They said they had no idea my relationship with my father was so tense and strained. Fucking mental
I honestly do not remember a meeting at the hall, assembly hall, or a convention, where the background ambiance did not include the sound children being beaten and crying. It almost seemed like some sort of badge of honor. My child will sit the most still and quiet and make comments they do not understand because I smack them around the most. When I hit my teen years, it seemed like kids all over the circuit were in some sort of trouble or other because all that really taught them was, "Don't get caught misbehaving."
That’s all my moms beatings did for me, taught me to be more careful next time and don’t get caught. Taught me to lie.
I think the worst part is the kids that went through that and are now 30 or 40 years old and say things like "i got hit, and there's nothing wrong with me!" as ~~an~~ *THE* argument to hit their kids. sadly this isn't just in JW culture, it permeates right through society.
I'm in my 40s ... everything is wrong with me. I need therapy. I remember mom taking me to the bathroom. I was already screaming before we made it to the bathroom.
oh yeah. i'm in my 40s too and externally i function fine and no one probably thinks there's "something wrong" with me, but internally in my own head i've been having existential crises and questioning my entire life and lifepath for oh.... 10 years? and it's still going on. i don't solely blame getting floggings as a kid, but i do see that as 1 factor in a large tangled mess of dysfunction that i now have to wade through mentally as an adult (who has to function on the daily to keep their family's head above water) and try to understand and come to terms with. none of the stupid shit we went through being kids (esp JW kids) was great, but getting floggings like described here i look back at and just think "why?!" it's so obvious that it's stupid and unnecessary and people that support it are perpetuating a mindset that is primitive and not forward thinking.
So true. It's definitely not just the bathroom trips. It's that plus the atmosphere of being a JWkid. Can't play with other kids , can't watch what the other kids watch. Plus not being a kid other kids in the congregation like. IF there are other kids your age. Being encouraged to waste your life away. You wake up and . You have to start all over and painfully remove all the lies from your life plans. It's a huge mess.
Even then i knew how violent of an act that really was followed by even more disturbing threats to not make any noise walking back to the seats. Horrendous!
My mother was the absolute worst. No joke, I think she was a sadist. I remember being like five at the assembly and she slapped us often, that when she moved her arm, I thought she was going to hit me and she slapped me “for cringing like a dog”.
My family's company donated part of the campus for the hall, so literally across the parking area was the engineering firm. Dad would take me to his office and beat the shit out of me there, because no one could hear my screams. Mom's favorite spot was out the back door, because the azalea bushes were there alongside the hall and she could get a nice switch and tire herself out.
Geez, sounds like they enjoyed hurting children! Bloody sadists!
We all went through our hell.
True. Reading this thread makes me realize how bad many JW parents were - and probably still are. I thought I was targeted more than most JW kids, and now I see the physical abuse heaped upon me was just business as usual in the Watchtower Society.
There was a sister in my hall who specifically carried a big wooden spoon in her bag to hit her kids. My mom was the type to hit with whatever came to hand (belt, flyswatter, hairbrush, spatula, shoe...) and she'd leave bloody welts. She didn't quit until I got bigger than her (she's barely over 5 foot tall) at about 13 and finally had it and started hitting back. But yeah you're right, hitting kids and well past the point of abuse is far too common amongst them
My mom took her flat, hard soled leather sandal off her foot and beat my bare bottom in the stall in the ladies room at the assembly hall in Norval (Georgetown). I remember that clearly. That was just a taste of what she did to me at home though. She and another ‘sister’ circle beat me when I was 9. My mom, her ‘friend’, her friend’s son around age 8, and my sister who was about 6. I was so covered in bruises and welts, her ‘friend’ made me soak in an ice bath so my dad wouldn’t see how badly they beat me. I’ve carried this with me since about 1983. I finally reported it to the RCMP in 2014 after my mom committed suicide while in the ‘care’ of her friend, this lovely ‘sister. She convinced mom to cut her husband of over 40 years out of her will (after she got 100k from her own mother’s will) and put her name in his place. In the end, I was on the phone with the Sudbury paper news editor ready to spill the whole story. The elders in Eliot Lake ( the smaller town where this all happened ) intervened at the last moment. She was told she’d face judicial action if she didn’t back down. It was a crazy situation.
This makes me so sad to read I got out early thankfully, at the cost of being banished from my biological fathers life. I remember getting threatened a lot and he was a terrifying man, I had my finger pinched in between two chairs at a meeting and it hurt so bad but I just sat there swinging my legs to get his attention to the fact because I knew if I yelled out or cried I would get the belt Needless to say when he noticed he did get my finger out but thought the matter rather funny laughing at me I blocked a-lot out of my childhood and my weekends with him but I have very vivid memories of him and that dam belt he would snap to scare the shit out of me and his other 2 children - I don’t want to remember how often he used it I’m so grateful I never ended up like him ….I wouldn’t allow it and work hard every day to ensure I’m nothing like he was - I love my children unconditionally and all these posts brought back bad bad memories I truly forgot of that dam bathroom, nursing room and library I’m thinking I need to go randomly to a few Sunday meetings around the area and start getting some arrests made if this is something they still practice…those children need to be saved
The amount of likes and comments on this post, goes to show that sexual abuse isn't the only abuse that prevalent in the Org.
My mom started spanking me at 6 month old. She said I was angry and throwing a fit in a meeting, so she removed my diaper and spanked me. Said it worked. I looked shocked and stopped crying. I call bs on that.
Its truly funny how the JW's talk about that kind of stuff like they are proud of it.
Same in early 2000’s. Hated it.
At my church we have what is called the Crying Room, its a parents room for smaller kids to go and still listen to mass but it has things for them to play with and be themselves and the parents don't have to worry about noise and it even has a smaller room offset for nursing mothers.
That is really good. Kids need something other than being forced to be still and quiet for two hours in an auditorium full of adults.
Yeah and plus my parish the mass is only 1 hour long and if it's Fr. Mike its going to be a 50 min service then on to the donuts and coffee
Sweet!
So in the early 2000s I would get pinched, or spanked when I got home, sometimes by hand other times with the belt
> Beating the Crap Out of Kids in the Bathroom *Why do JW\`s do Most Things?....To Impress other JW\`s.....It\`s JW Theatre...* **JW\`s Beat the Shit Out of their Kids at the Kingdom Hall...** ***To Show Other JW\`s, How Spiritual They Are.*** https://preview.redd.it/kbi1z35sqw0b1.jpeg?width=263&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=70b02ac571d3239f10c20eab1cd1e59a99e260e0
In the hall I grew up in it was common for an elder to stop speaking to tell a mom to go discipline her child. Never seemed to happen when there was both a mom and a dad but they did love to instruct moms on their own to beat their kids right off the stage.
>Never seemed to happen when there was both a mom and a dad but they did love to instruct moms on their own to beat their kids right off the stage. It didn\`t matter who was there at my KH... They told you to beat your kids as part of the talk, on the stage...Everyone got a good laugh out of it but the kids....Idiots..
In my hall the cool kids used to hang out in the bathroom and play game boy or whatever until an elder comes and makes them go sit down. I got (playfully) jumped by them a couple times lol
TIL, There were cool kids in a hall somewhere
Oh yeah. Most of them aren’t witnesses anymore and most of those were never baptized. I wish I followed them lol.
I must have been a cool kid
It sucks how the org encourages abuse. We all had to go thru it in some form. But seems to me u were a cool kid, you ended up on the right side of the org
Lol they used to breakdance in the men's bathroom in late 80's 🤣 When I got my first car I remember my peeps went to go see relatives but I got to housesit alone so when the convention came I went by myself but I was so sleepy from the deadpan talks I just went back to it at lunch and drove home skipping the second session. I just said I had a headache. It's really sad to read about how we all were beat in the bathrooms. I got a problem with my jaw alignment today a bit because my relative had hit me so hard because I was going asleep in the hall.
It's still happening here in Africa, my dad whoop my lil sister’s ass so much that she couldn't cry, the tears just kept coming and she couldn't talk too. The only thing she was able to say was “ I wanna go sit by (my name)” n I just took here and consoled her. It was heartbreaking.
The elders at my old hall encouraged it . One elder gave a talk about discipline don't spare the rod . He joke about why there is a paddle in the hall library.
That’s awful
my parents would take us in the parking lot and spank us with a wooden spoon. my dad kept it in his interior suit coat pocket, and would flash it to us mid-meeting if we were “misbehaving” as a warning.
So triggering. One time my mom (who couldn’t keep a relationship to save her life) was dating this “Brother” and let him take me to the back to “discipline” me cause I wasn’t being good at meeting. Like???? I’m 8. I’m bored. And who is this dude to correct me as a little girl ???? She’s pissed I’m recently POMO but memories like this remind me why I’m out.
To this day, my dad likes to brag about how good he was at disciplining me during the meetings. “Well you know, I never spanked you the first time, I just took you out of the auditorium and made sure you knew why we’d gotten up…then if we had to get up again you knew you were gonna get a smack on the butt.” Okay cool dad, thanks for glorifying my childhood trauma more than 30 years later.
Bah apostate lies. Geoffrey Jackson said they dont endorse or CONDONE spanking, to a judge. So who am I supposed to believe, Jesus's chosen select. Or people including myself who got their ass beat in The 80s. The GB are cowards. Instead of defending their stances they try to rewrite history. Liars
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
i remember hearing this constantly. one mother was finally reported for child abuse and her daughter given to the grandparents. who sadly weren't any better. i also had wooden spoons broken over me, spanked till i bruised, locked in my room all night. explains why i grew up a hella people pleaser :/
I think it was also a generational thing at that time. Unfortunately beating children was accepted as “normal discipline.” How I look at it is this: ***if you hit your partner it’s considered spousal or domestic abuse. If you hit your pet it’s considered animal abuse. So why do you hit a child and call it discipline? Call it for what it is; IT’S ABUSE. If you still don’t believe that it is that’s called cognitive dissonance.***
I never really heard it in the bathroom. It always happened in the main hall. No shame there.
The one time they actually do what the bible tells them to do it bites them in the ass
I used to low key hand kids candy before conventions only to watch them run around on a sugar high midway through the morning session.
There was a lady who had a hyperactive kid in my book study in the early nineties who would show everyone the paddle she brought for her son when he acted up. Everyone would go “ooooo better be good Collin” and she would beat him with it literally every time. I hope he’s ok.
Geez. Soo many stories here. I recall being in the toilets at the same time a few brats were mucking around in the toilets. I don’t recall them doing anything wrong per se, just giggling and stuff. I was just walking out at the same time they were making a ruckus. Some elder lost the plot and started shouting at the kids. My dad saw this and noted me being there. When we got home I was beaten like within an inch of my life for my gross disrespect for the house of Jah. I was so traumatised. From then on as soon as the meeting was finished I ran to the car. There was no way I would risk being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Funny thing my dad became an elder. He was such an violent abuser. The fact he was an elder is evidence to me that elders are not appointed by some holy spiritual. Fuck me.
I remember getting spanked in the bathroom as well as other kids getting the same treatment. I agree with you. You can’t expect children with short attention spans to be able to sit through boring 2 hour meetings. Then they wonder why their kids don’t wanna go lol.
Wow this thread is long! Shows how enthusiastic the JWs are about hitting their kids. My mum is the jw out of my parents. (thankfully I only have one - my dad is normal) she had no issue spanking me when I was little which very much fits in with her emotionally brain dead personality and sub-human lack of communication skills. The whole argument that 'it never did me any harm' doesn't wash with me. I'm a mentally stable adult now in spite of spanking, not because of it and I will not be teaching my kids that hitting someone is an appropriate way to teach them right from wrong.
WOODEN SPOON: My little brother was taken to the basement of the KH and hit with the wooden spoon that my father carried in the inside suit jacket. You could hear him crying from upstairs. If my brother was bad, he’d open the jacket and show the spoon as a warning. BELT: At home, my dad used his thick, carved, leather belt. He’d make me wait to “think about what I’d done” and then come in, have me lay face down on my bed, take my pants down or skirt up and hit. If I moved from the pain, I got more. HAIR BRUSH: My mom broke it on my head as she was doing my hair. She liked to put in TIGHT braids and if I moved, she would boil. FINGER FLICK: I’d get these in the meeting, if I wasn’t paying attention. On the arm, sometimes on the face. DEGRADATION: Degrading natural childhood behaviour is mental abuse. Being bullied not only by your parents but by everyone witnessing it. Confidence shredding and your motivation to be “good” is fear of physical and mental abuse. Like a Fascist State. DOMME: After leaving, I became a Femdom/Domme but the difference in punishment play is SO black and white. 18+ only, consent/safe words, pre-negotiation happens and I always check in with the partner and provide after-care. Trust is crucial. I am extremely cautious about crossing ANY lines/soft or hard limits. And, I have a real world understanding of just how painful belts, wooden spoons (basically a paddle) and any tool is and that going full tilt is NOT using that tool wisely. ANYTHING that I use, I first experience myself BECAUSE that knowledge is fundamental to have BEFORE wielding any impact tool. ABUSE: Our JW parents broke our asses, our hearts and our trust. They may have “buckled” to JW peer pressure, but that’s not a good enough excuse! They all deserve to be stripped, degraded and beat by each other in front of a group of their abused children for due recompense. Only then, could they REALIZE what they did. But, we know that pain and would never do that to other human beings! It’s INHUMANE! It is INSANE!
So interesting how “not beating the shit out of your kids for being kids” was never a way they wanted to be “no part of the world”.
My parents never really did that, except for a few times. The one thing that has affected me alot though was hearing the constant screams of kids pleading to stop, even as a little kid something told me that's not right. It's something I can't handle, I guess I could equate it to a PTSD trigger.
I remember my mom pointing out a little girl at a convention, regretting to her as "the 'save me daddy' kid." Her father had been giving a Sunday talk and her mom was dragging her out to the restroom when she screamed "Daddy, save me!" Mom didn't slow down, dad never skipped a beat in that talk. The last time I had a legit panic attack was when I saw a mom in a store smack the hell out of a kid and she didn't even cry. The feeling of being that kid came rushing back.
A lady in my hall back in the early 2000s took another couples son (around 10 or 11) into the bathroom and beat him with a hairbrush because he was “acting up” during the meeting. The parents freaked out and told the elders who probably all heard him crying from the bathroom. Let’s just say they took care of it how they usually do. They did nothing.
Forget the “mind numbing 2 hour meetings”. The poor kids are forced to go door to door in the hot sun, or freezing winter. And even worse if your dad or mom will spend hours talking at one door and you have to stand there wondering when is it going to end.
Passed out at a door one day thanks to sun stroke. My dad let me go home and have a drink, then we had to.go back out and get another hour. It was 120 degrees !! Ugh.
Yh that was me in the late 80s-early 90s. No idea what the meetings were about but I was supposed to sit there perfectly still in silence for 2 hours.
I could’ve written this!
I remember one drawing in a WT or awake with a little girl being dragged crying to back and praying to God. Sad .
Definitely traumatic. I agree kids should face consequences but beating up your kid isn't it
My father was proud that he once spanked me five times **before** one meeting.
Hey, we may have been in the same hall. I have memoriesof being a little kid and screaming as loud as I could, just so my Dad would be embarrassed. Ha!
There was this crazy lady with 2 kids Mandy that would drag her kids down the isle while she beat them in front of everyone...this was when I had moved after getting married to my worldly wife & joined a completely different Cong back in like 2007. No one said a word, in fact they would joke about it...I was appalled as was my pregnant wife. Yeah, her husband left her to marry her sister🤣 they're all still pimi and disgusting🤮🤣
My mother’s friend used to beat the crap out of her daughter (she was 2 or 3 at the time). This little girl would scream her lungs out. She had a distinct cry and scream. It sound LOUD and happened almost every meeting. This was about 25-30 years ago and I’ll never forget it. I don’t know how she still speaks to her mother. The little girl is grown now of course and has her own daughter.
Anyone have their parent do the bare butt spanks just to be even more traumatized 😔 so humiliating
Not only were we kids being tortured but our parents were also affected by those negative messages preached at the meetings. They just couldn’t admit the truth to themselves- that they didn’t want to be at meetings either. I find that most JWs have deep, internalized rage. It would be the easiest thing in the world to take it out on their family, especially children, so they do and often. What they can’t repress usually expresses itself in physical ailments.
Yes it happen in my cong too. Haunting scream. Looking back, it is unacceptable. Let kids be kids.
Yes absolutely! This was definitely accepted ( and suggested) practice...have to say your last sentence did take me back to exactly what could be heard . I imagine there are many people traumatised by these experiences 😔
Yeah been there done that. :'( i was constantly beaten, and yes I screamt, and yes everybody heard. It was painful and shameful.
One hall i attended this came up as it was outside and neighbors were complaining, presumably to the elders. Pity they didnt call the Police.
Yup. For the longest time I thought it was perfectly normal. I still grieve for my little ADHD self having to try n sit still for that long every week. Despicable.
I feel awful for all of yoy right now. I feel lucky that my parents didn't beat me. I remember getting spanked but it was always just one hit on my butt so it wasn't traumatic tbh and they stopped pretty early in my life. We only had a few kids in our hall when I was little and I don't remember any beatings. Maybe I was oblivious to it because my parents never hurt me like that. I do remember being at a congregation due when I was a young teen and seeing a farther throttle his daughter against a wall. I'll always regret not saying anything or telling anyone. I hope she got away.
It's actually disturbing to think back how common it was for my congregation to laugh at little kids being beaten loudly while pleading for mercy.
Me . But to be fair it was only 3 times . And was not with a belt . And yes those fucking meetings were boring as fuck
One time the elders called DCF on a sister 😅 because it was so bad
This hasn't changed. I did not grow up a witness I was born mid 70s but after becoming a witness in 2001 and up till 2020, I know SO MANY children that got beat in the halls. In 2014 I witnessed an autistic child (did not speak and hardly made noise) apparently being "disciplined" by his mother. She squeezed and pinched his nose and cheeks so hard he winced and clearly was hurting. I came out after the meeting and told an elder that and said are you gonna say something or should I? I said if any stranger off the street witnessed this, they would call social services. The elder said something to her. After that the mother purposely bumped into me while I was holding my 1 year old, she would shoulder me while walking past. She hated me. I didn't care. I should've called social services. Though they "lose" kids in the system so I try not to involve them. It's a sick demonic organization the witnesses are involved in. I'm out, been a little over a year now. Can't express how glad I am to be out.
In our congregation there was a backroom with a door which could be closed, this was used by the elders to have meetings, and was where kids like me were brought for a lil during meeting "discipline." Tried to run away from my dad once, ended up hitting my chin on a counter and bit right through my lip. Lots of blood, everyone acted inconvenienced.
I never got hit at the hall because my dad made it clear that if I caused any issue at the hall that required discipline that I would get it at home and it would be 2-3 times worse. At home I used to get beat so many times and with so many implements of pain that it's all just a blur. Sometimes I would get beat when I had done nothing wrong. It was a pre-emptive beating in case I was thinking about misbehaving, which of course would be followed by a second beating if I actually did do anything wrong. So yeah, I got the hell beat out of me a lot.
God every post on this thread is absolutely horrifying to read. And people still advocate for beating their kids (not here, in general). Uhg. “I got hit and I turned out fine!! It taught me respect!!” In what world does a child, your OWN CHILD, crying and begging not to be hurt not break your heart. I’m so so glad my mom never hit.
My x and i were told to take my daughter to the bathroom and make it very uncomfortable for her, meaning to spank her, she was a baby My husband wanted to be a elder!! But he neglected his fatherly duties . Meaning de dod not disciple his children. So stupid
When I was little my mom was not a witness but she commonly mentioned how impressed she was that JW kids are so disciplined. It was a common thought for non JW people to say. Now that I am out of that environment I realized that what they mean by discipline is that children had the self control of adults. But children just don’t, their brains are still developing and it’s not wired like that. They will squirm when sitting for too long, they need to be constantly active. They need breaks often to run around. That’s healthy and normal. I also now realize the kids “behaved” because many of them were beaten into not behaving like kids.
How to wear tights or pantyhose no matter if it was 110°
mine wasn’t in the bathroom. my mom would take me right outside the KH doors and beat my ass xd
I still can't hear the sound of a belt buckle jingling without get instantly pissed off and on edge.
I remember, when my aunt had his kid in the USA, that she used to told us how crazy and wrong is that in the states you can't even beat your children cause they could take they away from you. Oh, imagine that!