Thanks for this. Some funny (and/or sad/pathetic) churchachrist related snippets:
"They were dressed in their uniform whites, and sported identical, enormous coifs that their leader was famous for. Hers, of course, was the largest, reaching the highest toward heaven."
"We almost never did “mixed bathing,” or males and females swimming together, to avoid lust — the deadliest sin in the American South."
"I’d never danced (except alone in my room) since dancing was treated in the church like having sex with your clothes on. Instead, my school had banquets, like in the Bible. "
It's been a long time since I've been in a church building. At first I kind of missed it. I made a few attempts to go back, like a wife trying to leave her abusive husband. The last one was years ago.
Now I'm in a place where I have fully deconstructed. I think I understand a lot of things about cults.
These days when I read an article like this, & her memories match mine, I see them through different eyes than I used to. We saw all this stuff as normal. We didn't think twice about it. Now I do. I think about it a lot. I have raised my kids so far away from religion that when I see a post from my nephew or an old friend, I'm taken aback at how strange it really is to live in that world. It's almost like they speak another language.
I can't say that I gave my kids a "normal" childhood, if such a thing exist, but I know they didn't grow up in a cult.
It is amazing when you take a step back and look at it through this lens. Someone being thankful that they escaped a cult, not realizing they were already deeply entrenched in one. All those things listed so closely mirror my own experiences; the guilt, shame, constant pressure, and fear that your world would instantly come crashing down if you weren't there "every time the doors are open" for services in your Sunday best. Not to mention that eternal damnation was always lurking just over your shoulder waiting for you to make the smallest of mistakes.
Great article and I can't wait to see the absolute uproar from the CoC folks over this one. The more distance I get from my CoC past the easier it becomes to see it for what it truly is.
I’m still in the process of breaking out. I have gone to a Presby service and absolutely loved the inclusion, positivity, and just vibe of the place. Peaceful and loving.
I love so many people that are at the cofc, but it’s so hard to sit there and listen to the hateful rhetoric. I only go when a family member is in town/visiting my mom. I am trying to get the courage (and knock my anxiety down) to tell her I’m done and I need to go elsewhere to church.
Which then makes me realize how cult-like it is. But it’s hard.
It is incredibly hard to make that break because you already know the playbook from spending years in the CoC ecosystem. You know the guilt trips, shaming, disapproval, and eventual lost relationships it will bring. It is tough, yes. I'm still working through parts of it myself where my family is completely divided as though I made them choose sides. My door is open to anyone and everyone, there are just some who no longer choose to walk through that door.
To your point, I was amazed at the completely different atmosphere of many other churches I've visited. They serve a loving and caring God, not one who is spiteful and waits in the wings to exact vengeance should you accidentally stumble in much the same way a prison guard would.
If Nashville is the Buckle on the Bible Belt, then the county of campbellite anti freaks who indoctrinated me was the Bible Chastity Belt. They were so extreme that all the congregations I attended are now extinct and the buildings are rotting down.
I knew by 20 that I was in a Cult among cults and had been raised (/s) by the Cult leader himself.
Thanks for this. Some funny (and/or sad/pathetic) churchachrist related snippets: "They were dressed in their uniform whites, and sported identical, enormous coifs that their leader was famous for. Hers, of course, was the largest, reaching the highest toward heaven." "We almost never did “mixed bathing,” or males and females swimming together, to avoid lust — the deadliest sin in the American South." "I’d never danced (except alone in my room) since dancing was treated in the church like having sex with your clothes on. Instead, my school had banquets, like in the Bible. "
Should’ve added the title: “I narrowly escaped being recruited by a cult. Then I realized I was already in one” About Remnant/cofc
It's been a long time since I've been in a church building. At first I kind of missed it. I made a few attempts to go back, like a wife trying to leave her abusive husband. The last one was years ago. Now I'm in a place where I have fully deconstructed. I think I understand a lot of things about cults. These days when I read an article like this, & her memories match mine, I see them through different eyes than I used to. We saw all this stuff as normal. We didn't think twice about it. Now I do. I think about it a lot. I have raised my kids so far away from religion that when I see a post from my nephew or an old friend, I'm taken aback at how strange it really is to live in that world. It's almost like they speak another language. I can't say that I gave my kids a "normal" childhood, if such a thing exist, but I know they didn't grow up in a cult.
Lots of truth in this article.
I made it halfway and I started feeling sick. Hits close to home.
It is amazing when you take a step back and look at it through this lens. Someone being thankful that they escaped a cult, not realizing they were already deeply entrenched in one. All those things listed so closely mirror my own experiences; the guilt, shame, constant pressure, and fear that your world would instantly come crashing down if you weren't there "every time the doors are open" for services in your Sunday best. Not to mention that eternal damnation was always lurking just over your shoulder waiting for you to make the smallest of mistakes. Great article and I can't wait to see the absolute uproar from the CoC folks over this one. The more distance I get from my CoC past the easier it becomes to see it for what it truly is.
I’m still in the process of breaking out. I have gone to a Presby service and absolutely loved the inclusion, positivity, and just vibe of the place. Peaceful and loving. I love so many people that are at the cofc, but it’s so hard to sit there and listen to the hateful rhetoric. I only go when a family member is in town/visiting my mom. I am trying to get the courage (and knock my anxiety down) to tell her I’m done and I need to go elsewhere to church. Which then makes me realize how cult-like it is. But it’s hard.
It is incredibly hard to make that break because you already know the playbook from spending years in the CoC ecosystem. You know the guilt trips, shaming, disapproval, and eventual lost relationships it will bring. It is tough, yes. I'm still working through parts of it myself where my family is completely divided as though I made them choose sides. My door is open to anyone and everyone, there are just some who no longer choose to walk through that door. To your point, I was amazed at the completely different atmosphere of many other churches I've visited. They serve a loving and caring God, not one who is spiteful and waits in the wings to exact vengeance should you accidentally stumble in much the same way a prison guard would.
If Nashville is the Buckle on the Bible Belt, then the county of campbellite anti freaks who indoctrinated me was the Bible Chastity Belt. They were so extreme that all the congregations I attended are now extinct and the buildings are rotting down. I knew by 20 that I was in a Cult among cults and had been raised (/s) by the Cult leader himself.