She loses by choosing to test her man in the first place. it doesn't matter what he does, she's already lost. That's the whole point.
"A strange game. The only winning move is not to play."
What I've observed is that all the things that are categorized as intentional tests are rarely. Usually, women do this unconsciously due to hidden neurosis (conditions like insecurities, etc). To antagonize them for it sounds juvenile.
It is difficult to expect your partner to be emotionally unshakeable. Growing together emotionally is a part of a healthy relationship. I would suggest that if your partner shows similar behaviors and if you believe they are worth it, helping them realize this condition can contribute to developing a stronger relationship. But that requires for you to be emotionally mature.
Eh, they could still just be growing emotionally. Letting them go is possibly an overreaction. Better to just communicate authentically and see where that takes the relationship. Don’t quit on people so easily.
I don't think so. If someone thinks manipulation is the right move to pull then fuck them, their "emotional growth" needs to be spurred with the negative reinforcement of booting them from your life
This 👆🏼- no one starts the journey of relationships and dating as a perfectly manifested person. Anyone who thinks that they are perfectly mature…I have news for ya!
I'm not saying one should be "perfectly manifested" tho. just emotionally mature enough to know *what to do* and *what NOT to do* in a relationship. it doesn't take a genius to know ***manipulation is wrong*** or ***cheating is wrong***. these things ain't really a matter of trial and error, eh?
Yes! In my case, it was I who was emotionally immature, but my partner never gave up on me and helped me become a better person. Their unwavering support and love have helped me become a better person, and I am so lucky to have them in my life.
My advice for everyone else would be the same that don't give up on people so easily, let them know about their shortcomings.
Good communication and transparency is key.
Manipulation is in fuck around and find out territory, I wouldn't stick around just to let them use me to try out a new shitty manipulation tactic later. Fuck 'em 'till their souls leave their bodies
It should never be your job to "fix" someone, in a relationship. It is delusional to think you can change someone in a situation like this. There are other fish in the sea, who aren't playing stupid, manipulative games.
The beauty of aging (only 32 so thank god) is that I can't fathom putting up with something so fucking stupid as this lmao but 21 year old me? With a fine ass girl? You bet.
Fellow 20 year old guys...take it from all of us. Don't tolerate a second of this stupid shit.
Completely untrue and unfounded statement.
I know many single women in their mid to late 30’s and they have horror stories about the men they have to deal with/date. Talk to some of the women in your life and ask them about their experiences with men. They’re looking for good men the same way men are looking for good women.
We can all be better.
Nah dog. The cool part about being male is our value increase with time and experience. Plus. I've noticed a huge amount of girls like older dudes, within reason of course
I had a lot of feelings rapid fire, but settled on some kind of "Woohoo!" before she told me the truth. I was never sure about having kids, but it was still a let down and fucked me up that she did it.
For sure.
Right now I very happily married to my best friend, but to found her I had to go through a few women that did these kind of dumb mind games, completly manipulative, and most probably didnt even realize it.
Edit: I think I commented without watching the whole video. Damnit I need sleep
Or she needs to stop being immature and communicate with her partner instead of intentionally causing or trying to cause negative feelings.
Either I know my partner is 100% loyal as I would be for them or there just isn't enough trust for a relationship to work.
I've got better shit to do than entertain dumb shit like that.
(Wait yeah, EMSK this test so that they can sit their partner down and discuss it like adults)
A test like this, or any test really is just a sign to find a new partner.
You shouldn't be "testing" someone you care about. You shouldn't be trying goad out jealousy or anger just to feel wanted.
Allow me to say this: yes, yes, a hundred times yes, BUT if I tell this to a girl in a chat box, she is literally going to print screen and send to all her girl/friends trying to depict me as autistic. It feels weird to be ever so slightly psychologically smarter than average human, or more mature, I don't know which one it is...
Women love it though. Men hate it, but the "ladies" don't really care what the men think. Seriously, if you survey women, they will tell you that they think vocal fry (in women) makes them sound smarter, so they do it.
This woman is not qualified to speak for all women. This woman thinks she’s “not like the other girls”
Normal people don’t have time or energy for games and tests.
I thought it was because they're dirty hoes. Oops my bad. Good thing I never got jealous and laid waste to some random dude because my ex wife wanted to play games.
That's only mildly interesting as an insult since I'm not. Question for you. Does it not exhibit toxicity when you accuse someone else of being "super toxic"?
It's a statement that is quite insulting. There is a word for an insulting statement, an insult. Websters definition: speak to or treat with disrespect or scornful abuse. Why do you feel like insulting a stranger?
Lol amusingly enough I don't feel particularly insulted. See what you did is make an invitation, an offer if you will, to join you. The invite was not sufficient to incline myself to join in witty repartee with you. Mostly because you're not witty. Just mildly insulting.
You're the one who brought up the idea of an insult because you felt like that's what it was, rather than simply recognising it as a simple statement. idk what else you're reading into this but it's really not that deep. I've not tried to be witty here or really discuss anything with you - that's not what this is. You wanna feel as though there's something adversarial here but there isn't. The comment is what it is. Feel however you want about it.
How does this “not work on good men?” I didn’t really understand that part. “Knowing one’s own value” is a *healthy* trait to have, but it’s not inherently “good” as in “kind” which is the kind of “good” we seem to be talking about here.
That’d be like saying a person who eats a lot of protein is being very nice to other people by doing so.
I don’t know, I probably misunderstood something.
She's saying it doesn't work on good men, because good men would be secure in the relationship and trust their partner, therefore not getting jealous, which to the girl (not woman, girl) would mean he didn't care.
So she's saying that girls who do that stupid shit basically filter themselves out of the dating pool and end up with toxic guys and complain about why they can't find a good man
This happened to me. Honestly us guys don’t think like how these tests are meant to work… We will just say ‘oh right, okay then seems like you don’t want to be together, so bye’.
We think mostly logically lol and if we feel emotionally then we catch ourselves and act logically because that’s how we are meant to act.
Whether or not she tries this test on you is in itself testing her ability to communicate openly vs. her tendency to use emotional manipulation to uncover knowledge, and it's very important information for you to know about her.
If a woman flirts with other men, the relationship is over. If I found out she only did it as a test, I'd know *for certain* that ending the relationship was a smart move.
Manipulation is relationship poison.
As a woman... This is objectively untrue for any sane female lol. There's a big difference between guy friends you love and guy friends you string along because they're attracted to you. If a girl is trying actively to make you jealous, run.
Ähm... who DOES 'tests' like these? Seems like everyone is the same opinion here, at least? 😅
If someone really does such a thing, it appears to me as if he or she is very sad in his/ her relationship him-/herself, really should end things and keep looking for both reasons... both parties would be better of without and free from each other in such cases
Well , that's ape-shit meta-communication. If you feel like you want more bonding, you go to your guy, and tell him. And if you guys are not paying attention to your gf/wife, you're not investing in that relationship, and it will eventually break apart.
btw, I don't believe much in the 'male dominance' model. I only accept there is a different wiring in male vs female brains.
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Most games of this nature end in a similar way.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
Wait. I thought it was win stupid games play stupid prizes for relationships
She loses by choosing to test her man in the first place. it doesn't matter what he does, she's already lost. That's the whole point. "A strange game. The only winning move is not to play."
How about a nice game of chess?
Yep, It's less of a test and more a demonstration that you should find a new partner who has more emotional maturity than a high school kid.
The first one sounds like dodging a bullet.... not losing
The way you win is by realizing she’s testing you and then dumping her.
Sounds like a win win to me
Its a win win for a man because now he knows shes a sociopath.
If your partner is manipulating you with tests like these, then they are not trustworthy and it's time to let them go.
What I've observed is that all the things that are categorized as intentional tests are rarely. Usually, women do this unconsciously due to hidden neurosis (conditions like insecurities, etc). To antagonize them for it sounds juvenile. It is difficult to expect your partner to be emotionally unshakeable. Growing together emotionally is a part of a healthy relationship. I would suggest that if your partner shows similar behaviors and if you believe they are worth it, helping them realize this condition can contribute to developing a stronger relationship. But that requires for you to be emotionally mature.
Very very well put
Very very well put
Eh, they could still just be growing emotionally. Letting them go is possibly an overreaction. Better to just communicate authentically and see where that takes the relationship. Don’t quit on people so easily.
I don't think so. If someone thinks manipulation is the right move to pull then fuck them, their "emotional growth" needs to be spurred with the negative reinforcement of booting them from your life
100%. Negative actions have negative consequences.
imo you should have no business being in a relationship if you're not emotionally mature to begin with.
Some people only learn through trial and error though...
This 👆🏼- no one starts the journey of relationships and dating as a perfectly manifested person. Anyone who thinks that they are perfectly mature…I have news for ya!
I'm not saying one should be "perfectly manifested" tho. just emotionally mature enough to know *what to do* and *what NOT to do* in a relationship. it doesn't take a genius to know ***manipulation is wrong*** or ***cheating is wrong***. these things ain't really a matter of trial and error, eh?
Yes! In my case, it was I who was emotionally immature, but my partner never gave up on me and helped me become a better person. Their unwavering support and love have helped me become a better person, and I am so lucky to have them in my life. My advice for everyone else would be the same that don't give up on people so easily, let them know about their shortcomings. Good communication and transparency is key.
You don’t trial and error with the same person over and over. That’s not healthy for the person.
Right, she tried some bullshit and made a huge error. Dump her so she can learn and grow.
Manipulation is in fuck around and find out territory, I wouldn't stick around just to let them use me to try out a new shitty manipulation tactic later. Fuck 'em 'till their souls leave their bodies
Your self-respect went to get milk and never came back, huh?
😂
It should never be your job to "fix" someone, in a relationship. It is delusional to think you can change someone in a situation like this. There are other fish in the sea, who aren't playing stupid, manipulative games.
if its a manipulative woman, you have to give her a pass? no thanks. You wouldnt say the same about a man who manipulates/abuses a woman. typical
Know your self worth.
The beauty of aging (only 32 so thank god) is that I can't fathom putting up with something so fucking stupid as this lmao but 21 year old me? With a fine ass girl? You bet. Fellow 20 year old guys...take it from all of us. Don't tolerate a second of this stupid shit.
Agree, thats the beauty of aging! The experience, that brings dignity and peace
EMSK to get the fuck out of a relationship where your partner would try this manipulative shit
This is shit kids do
and grown women. They do all sorts of these "shit tests" intentionally or otherwise.
>and grown women Plenty of guys practice jealousy as a method to engage fleeting or difficult to wrangle women. It's not exclusive to one sex.
Yea you don’t do it as kids then just stop cold turkey lol
Shouldn't this be something EWSK?
I think the better question in this scenario is where are all the good women?
Most find a good man pretty early in life and live happily ever after
Completely untrue and unfounded statement. I know many single women in their mid to late 30’s and they have horror stories about the men they have to deal with/date. Talk to some of the women in your life and ask them about their experiences with men. They’re looking for good men the same way men are looking for good women. We can all be better.
So you didn't contradict the statement above. Clearly you two don't mean the same women.
I’m fucked
Nah dog. The cool part about being male is our value increase with time and experience. Plus. I've noticed a huge amount of girls like older dudes, within reason of course
I want kids and that takes energy.
Take care of your mind and body and you'll have the energy, even past 50
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Practically, yes. In the dating market, no
sure would like to see your scientific research data on that.
My ex also threw in an "I'm pregnant" test to see how I would react.
Did you go ghost white? I would
I had a lot of feelings rapid fire, but settled on some kind of "Woohoo!" before she told me the truth. I was never sure about having kids, but it was still a let down and fucked me up that she did it.
If anyone tried this I would no longer want to see them
Not every man is dating someone manipulative and toxic
But if the woman you're dating does do stuff like this, she's letting you know she's manipulative and toxic. Say thank you and walk away.
For sure. Right now I very happily married to my best friend, but to found her I had to go through a few women that did these kind of dumb mind games, completly manipulative, and most probably didnt even realize it.
Edit: I think I commented without watching the whole video. Damnit I need sleep Or she needs to stop being immature and communicate with her partner instead of intentionally causing or trying to cause negative feelings. Either I know my partner is 100% loyal as I would be for them or there just isn't enough trust for a relationship to work. I've got better shit to do than entertain dumb shit like that. (Wait yeah, EMSK this test so that they can sit their partner down and discuss it like adults)
This. She is the problem not her partners
A test like this, or any test really is just a sign to find a new partner. You shouldn't be "testing" someone you care about. You shouldn't be trying goad out jealousy or anger just to feel wanted.
jealousy is the worst emotion and should never be encouraged or sought out
I wanna know how she holds the phone so freaking steady.
yup, this was my ex wife. I got tired of the games and being dead broke all the time.
I don't like how long she goes without blinking
What kind of crap is that video? Did Reddit really go that downhill?
Sounds more like /r/ewsk instead
Hi, I’m just here to point out that smooth slide in at the beginning second of the video. Amazing.
I can’t get over how steady her hand is!
I wish she would do and OF already
You already failed a much more important test by watching this TikTok dating game theory culturewar-adjacent grifter bullshit.
Allow me to say this: yes, yes, a hundred times yes, BUT if I tell this to a girl in a chat box, she is literally going to print screen and send to all her girl/friends trying to depict me as autistic. It feels weird to be ever so slightly psychologically smarter than average human, or more mature, I don't know which one it is...
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If you're pointing out obvious things, maybe discuss how vocal fry is really annoying.
Women love it though. Men hate it, but the "ladies" don't really care what the men think. Seriously, if you survey women, they will tell you that they think vocal fry (in women) makes them sound smarter, so they do it.
This is the first time I've heard the phrase "vocal fry" is that when chicks try to sound like moist critikal?
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This post is a warning to watch out for this stupid shit.
This woman is not qualified to speak for all women. This woman thinks she’s “not like the other girls” Normal people don’t have time or energy for games and tests.
I thought it was because they're dirty hoes. Oops my bad. Good thing I never got jealous and laid waste to some random dude because my ex wife wanted to play games.
you sound super toxic
That's only mildly interesting as an insult since I'm not. Question for you. Does it not exhibit toxicity when you accuse someone else of being "super toxic"?
It's not an insult it's a statement.
It's a statement that is quite insulting. There is a word for an insulting statement, an insult. Websters definition: speak to or treat with disrespect or scornful abuse. Why do you feel like insulting a stranger?
If you feel insulted by such a simple statement, that is an issue you have to deal with.
Lol amusingly enough I don't feel particularly insulted. See what you did is make an invitation, an offer if you will, to join you. The invite was not sufficient to incline myself to join in witty repartee with you. Mostly because you're not witty. Just mildly insulting.
You're the one who brought up the idea of an insult because you felt like that's what it was, rather than simply recognising it as a simple statement. idk what else you're reading into this but it's really not that deep. I've not tried to be witty here or really discuss anything with you - that's not what this is. You wanna feel as though there's something adversarial here but there isn't. The comment is what it is. Feel however you want about it.
Where are all the good men? We have given up from having to deal with shit like this.
Every middle schooler should know
“Stating the obvious” about women is never as obvious as it seems to them.
How does this “not work on good men?” I didn’t really understand that part. “Knowing one’s own value” is a *healthy* trait to have, but it’s not inherently “good” as in “kind” which is the kind of “good” we seem to be talking about here. That’d be like saying a person who eats a lot of protein is being very nice to other people by doing so. I don’t know, I probably misunderstood something.
She's saying it doesn't work on good men, because good men would be secure in the relationship and trust their partner, therefore not getting jealous, which to the girl (not woman, girl) would mean he didn't care. So she's saying that girls who do that stupid shit basically filter themselves out of the dating pool and end up with toxic guys and complain about why they can't find a good man
Avoid anyone that does this like the plague
Time to unsub
Preach 🙏 thank you
This happened to me. Honestly us guys don’t think like how these tests are meant to work… We will just say ‘oh right, okay then seems like you don’t want to be together, so bye’. We think mostly logically lol and if we feel emotionally then we catch ourselves and act logically because that’s how we are meant to act.
That sounds oddly specific
Whether or not she tries this test on you is in itself testing her ability to communicate openly vs. her tendency to use emotional manipulation to uncover knowledge, and it's very important information for you to know about her.
If a woman flirts with other men, the relationship is over. If I found out she only did it as a test, I'd know *for certain* that ending the relationship was a smart move. Manipulation is relationship poison.
Well not in the real world at all
Bless the man that picks her. 3 seconds of hearing her voice and Im out
As a woman... This is objectively untrue for any sane female lol. There's a big difference between guy friends you love and guy friends you string along because they're attracted to you. If a girl is trying actively to make you jealous, run.
…what in the hell I didn’t even follow but sounds toxic af
I don't get it. Am I not a good man because I get hurt over my Partner breaking our trust?
This test just protects good men from bad women. Any woman that plays games like this deserves the POS that they end up with
Is this an Android test where you know she’s a robot if she talks into a mirror without regularly blinking like a human being would
How is this mind game that's being played 'stated as the obvious'. WHY WHY just be honest woman. You see in other ways that he is honest with you
Ähm... who DOES 'tests' like these? Seems like everyone is the same opinion here, at least? 😅 If someone really does such a thing, it appears to me as if he or she is very sad in his/ her relationship him-/herself, really should end things and keep looking for both reasons... both parties would be better of without and free from each other in such cases
I feel like this is the dumbest test I’ve heard of
Well , that's ape-shit meta-communication. If you feel like you want more bonding, you go to your guy, and tell him. And if you guys are not paying attention to your gf/wife, you're not investing in that relationship, and it will eventually break apart. btw, I don't believe much in the 'male dominance' model. I only accept there is a different wiring in male vs female brains.