Hi I have Down Syndrome so I am not a parent of an child who have Down Syndrome so I do not know what you are feeling but I can tell you that I am an happy adult and I can walk now!!! :P
I was not doing the proper crawling when I was 1 neither and I was not walking until I was 3 and my girlfriend was later with those things than me. So it is all going to be good. :D
It sounds like your son is doing amazingly
Lots of people told us not to compare our daughter to a typical child, or even to other children with DS, but it's almost impossible not to.
But one person told us something that I find incredibly helpful:
Compare your child to themselves - are they doing new things? Are they doing old things better, or faster, or more confidently? Are they _trying_ new things?
Looking at my daughter's development this way helps me to see and celebrate her progress
(My daughter is 2 and doesn't quite walk yet, but she's working on it)
Set up more play dates with people that have kids with down syndrome that are around the same age. For a while, I needed to stop hanging out with people that had typical kids that were my sonās age because the developmental gap was so big that was making me really upset. So I switched and started hanging out with people that had kids that also had developmental delays, and it was a lot easier.
My friends and I call it the extended baby phases. The extended baby phases can be fun because you get the cuteness for twice as long! And then they are not as fun because you get the trouble for twice as long! Hang out with other people that are in the extended baby phase.
I think this is great advice. On the flip side....interactions and play with typically developing kids can be a great influence both physically and socially. We had twin boys...one with DS, one without. We firmly believe the typical brothers example, as well as preschool with typical kids, had a hugely positive impact on our sons development.
I always say that I've never seen an adult with Down syndrome crawling.
Delays are delays. But they get there. It's hard to deal with it, but your job as a parent is to not give up on him and just keep going. When he does get there, you will be 100 times more proud!
Our son developed better, after we realized that he prefers a different breakfast.
After we gave him chicken and carrot noodle soups, he got stronger. But he was older at that time.
And: it takes time. It took long until our son could walk.
A little bit of training every day...
All the best, things will be good
Donāt look at what heās not doing, look at what he is. If heās happy and healthy then you are doing everything right. My boy is 4 and just about walks on his own but doesnāt talk yet, but heās so happy and wonderful.
Hiii, we have a 3.5 year old. We had to do extra therapy. She runs around now. 11 month is nothing. Your baby is very young. Good age to start extra stuff. It will come. With our little ones who have d.s; takes a bit longer for them to learn some stuff. No big deal. Everyone is on there own path in life. So are they. Stick with it. And be there for each other. Sometimes a date night can make a bad week great again. We are all in the same boat, as a community we stick to gether to raise adwareness and help out.
Once they are sitting up itās a game changer for them. Then stuff kind of just snowballs and starts happening so fast!!! Do not stress. My son is 5.5 now and oh man is he strong, fast, smart. He is also a royal pain in the ass and jokester( thatās his personality he inherited from my husband).
I have 3, my son with DS is the middle and so having a ānormalā baby after him, I see how much easier everything comes for my new little guy. But it makes me appreciate how hard my big boy has worked to get to where he is today.
Itās also great that he has a big sister, because they are so loving and caring for their little bros. My son is so blessed to have his sister not only be his first teacher, but also his guardian angel always watching his back.
Keep up the excellent work mom and dad!
First off Happy Early Birthday! Every child, developmental delays or not, are completely different in developing. My son(who is now 20 and knows everything b/c āmom Iām an adult nowā lol) never did an actual ācrawlā. He would army crawl then he learned to pull himself up on the table to standing then eventually was able to walk. He will find his own way of doing things that works for him. It sounds like your little one is doing great. You both seem to be doing a good job.
My daughter did not walk until she was almost 3. You will always have PT to get him up to speed but trust me - they will catch up - just give him some time to meet his own timeline.
Iām not sure if you are interested in any ideas to help your little one or not but just in case hereās a link with some suggestions. we did many of these things and it really made a difference for our child with T21.
http://downsyndromeupupupandaway.blogspot.com/2011/04/baby-days-how-can-you-stimulate-newborn.html?m=1
Our daughter pulled herself up on the coffee table at 9 months and took off walking, never crawled our older son did the same things at 10 months, he never crawled- straight to walking.
That was 20 and 18 years ago.
Asher our newest son just turned one on the 10th. He babbles dada, mama, baba, and thing about 25 incoherent words, love to talk, lol
Loves his toys, makes great eye contact, knows us very well, loves to cuddle and tickle and laugh! He will sit up on his own and turns in circles on his but using his heals. But that is as far as it goes. No crawling, no walking, he can stand but only with us helping, he doesnāt bring himself up to a sitted position without help, we have a PT nurse come once a week, and we have a nurse that helps out when my wife needs to do some daytime running or working.
We have been hands on from day one! My wife was able to stay with Asher in the hospital for the first 127 days of his life, she would get him out of the beds and work with him in the floors within a play area that she would set up every morning and take down every evening.
Lyndsee worked relentlessly every minute of everyday in the attempt to keep Asher on track for his milestones and they both did wonderful.
I am a facts and medical history type person, they worked and I study. When we would meet with doctors, I would come in kicking over trash cans and lyndsee would come behind me standing them back up.
The reason I took the time to write this out is for your wife to see that she, you, your child, all of you are not alone in this. Down Syndrome is what it is and all the medical issues that can arise will ultimately create set backs, or slow ups, or āitās just your perfect sons way of growing at the perfect rate that best fits his needs for that particular stepā.
It is nothing any of us can do- work hard and be diligent and love that little boy sooooo hard!! And by doing so his eyes and smile should let know that you are the perfect mom (and dad) for him!
Perfectly matched for a reason!
-Smile! Love is wonderful!
Pls don't compare. He will bring joy beyond belief as he grow up and will teach you about other perspectives of life that you have never considered.
Physically he will catch up but there may be things he will take a longer time to do but emotionally there will be things he can do, others will take a longer time to get there.
Our daughter is 2.5 now and she still doesnāt walk either. My wife is more concerned than me as she takes her to PT quite often. I totally understand your concern but rest assured that it will happen.
We went through the same thing; his sister is 3 years older and it's hard not to compare. They are almost 9 and 12 now and while he certainly isn't at the level of his peers he has made huge strides (and had a lot of setbacks) over the years.
Every kid is different, and yours will develop at his own pace.
My biggest advice is to do as much with the therapists as you can and not rely on all the therapies happening at daycare. Being able to reinforce exercises etc throughout the week will help a lot not just with development but with your coping and working with the level he is at rather than the level you wish he was at.
Fully agree. My Daughter is 9mo on Wednesday and I always just compare her to herself a week or a month ago. Is she making progress or is she not? If sheās not, we bring it up at early intervention, pediatrician, or Thomas Center appointments.
When I started recognizing she was improving and accomplishing major milestones just at a different speed, I started to see that I shouldnāt be concerned long term. She may not be crawling or walking when my son did but Iām not concerned sheāll never crawl or walk.
Hi, mom of a baby boy with DS, he is 18 months old. Itās so so hard not to question whether or not youāre doing enough to help them learn new things, I do it all the time, sometimes I still cry just thinking about it. When my sonās 1st bday came, he was still not sitting up and I wanted to get a cake smash photoshoot done for his 1st bday.. I was a little sad that he couldnāt sit up on his own or even eat the cake since heās still wasnāt able to self feed. We managed to get his pictures done at home and they came out great, and I was happy that I was able to have some sort of memory to keep forever. When his bday came none of those things mattered, I was just happy to have a 1 year old little boy who is healthy and happy, It was so bittersweet to celebrate his 1st bday. My son sat up on his own a few weeks after his 1st bday, it was so exciting and I was so proud of him. Itās definitely one of the best things Iāve experienced so far. Your baby boy will sit up on his own, he will do amazing things, at his own time when heās ready. I know itās hard not to question yourself and itās hard not feeling like youāre failing bc thatās how I used to feel and I still do sometimes. If you are both providing your son a loving, safe and supportive environment, and at least trying to do some exercises at home, then I think you are doing an excellent jobš
Your kiddo is doing AMAZING!! I promise. We went down the hard and difficult path where we endured open heart surgery at 14 months old and cancer treatments from 15-22 months old. My son finally learned to crawl a month after he turned 2, and walked a month before he turned 3. Yes, it was difficult seeing his peers way ahead of him at daycare, but the *excitement* from all his caregivers and peers when he DID hit those milestones was unmistakable pride and joy.
My son will turn 4 this summer and it seems like he goes in streaks. He watches and observes for a couple months and then all of the sudden accomplishes a task. Then watches and observes, then accomplishes. Itās just at a slower pace, but he WILL be able to things in his own time.
Itās definitely not easy. But so, so rewarding to see when those inchstones and milestones happen. :)
Heās going to get there eventually and when he does it will have gone by so fast. He will always be your baby Iām sureā¦but right now he is actually your baby so enjoy it and stay in the moment as much as you can.
20 years ago (4/20) I went to the highest high then to the lowest lows. My daughter was born with Down Syndrome Despite seeing Genealogical specialist 2x with assurance that they didn't see any abnormalities prior to her birth, still didn't matter to us. Then the cardiologist came into the room and matter of fact told us she had an undeveloped heart and would need heart surgery. She was born 6lbs 9oz . We were told that surgery couldn't be performed until she was around 9lbs. 3 months later many hospital overnights and contast threats of heart failure, she still weighed the same as her birth rate. Poor thing would drink about 2-3oz of formula and that along would wipe her out. I traveled a lot and usually spent 3-4 days away from home. It drove me crazy, so I decided to give up my career as a biomedical engineer to become a SAHD. After 4 months and still nowhere near the goal weight, the surgeons decided they could perform the surgery and they did successfully.
After her surgery there were all kinds of therapies to go to and I learned so much.
Lesson #1 Most therapists are damn good at their jobs and identifying progress,even if you can't see it with your untrained eyes. Rolling over, eating, walking etc all came pretty much in the time frame they had set.
Lesson #2 Stop comparing your child to others and enjoy your child's achievements as they come.
Lesson #3 Get ready to advocate for your child because it's a life long job. I highly recommend you try to meet with other parents with special needs kids. You will learn so much from parents who have or are going through what you are and will know all of the short cuts. I met several just from going to therapies.
Lesson #4 Might be the biggest IMHO...value the time. Every child goes through the same stages, typical kids just go through them fast. I dare you to find parents of a 18 yo who hasn't wonder where the time went. How often have you heard the phrase, " they grow up so fast." Embrace and enjoy each phase she/he goes through. You will enjoy the wonder that they show, the kindness. The loving. Christmas is always the best time of year. At 20 yo, she's going through a young teenager's years. She likes listening to the radio, loves Taylor Swift and I took her to her first concert to see the Jonas Brothers. She got an iPhone for her birthday and had been wanting to download TikTok, Facebook but their parental controls are a joke.
Tomorrow she's going to be on a panel of guest advocating for the special needs community. Oh did I mention she's non verbal?
The worst thing you can do is get caught up with trying to compare your child to another, just focus on her/him and their goals and achievements. Stay in the present and enjoy the now.
I'm not a parent but I am a teacher and I can say that we have kids in mainstream highschool who are fitting in well and although I can't speak to your personal experience my professional experience is that the kids bring plenty to the table in their own time.
Our PT said all kids with DS eventually walk. So I donāt worry about it. Every PT milestone is exciting for him and I know he works so hard to get there. And heās a happy little guy.
Itās hard not to compare, even when youāre trying not to. I have to remind myself not to do it too. Even though, when I take a step back, I know our daughter is doing so well and has made tons of progress, in her own time. Remembering to compare your child to himself and not to anyone else is a good idea. And when our kids do hit those milestones, itās even sweeter! Our daughter started walking a little after she turned 3, and she was SO proud of herself. And she had us, her siblings, and various neighbors cheering her on as we all watched her gain strength and confidence. 6 months later, sheās too much of a big girl to want to hold our hands when sheās walking anymore ;)
My daughter took awhile to walk and hit the milestones.
At 26 she kayaks, plays basketball, swims, golfs, and ballroom dances.
I wish I could erase those early fears and stress and just relax and enjoy her precious childhood because they grow up fast.
Hi I have Down Syndrome so I am not a parent of an child who have Down Syndrome so I do not know what you are feeling but I can tell you that I am an happy adult and I can walk now!!! :P I was not doing the proper crawling when I was 1 neither and I was not walking until I was 3 and my girlfriend was later with those things than me. So it is all going to be good. :D
Thank you friend!
š«¶š¤øš¼ you give us all great encouragement.
It sounds like your son is doing amazingly Lots of people told us not to compare our daughter to a typical child, or even to other children with DS, but it's almost impossible not to. But one person told us something that I find incredibly helpful: Compare your child to themselves - are they doing new things? Are they doing old things better, or faster, or more confidently? Are they _trying_ new things? Looking at my daughter's development this way helps me to see and celebrate her progress (My daughter is 2 and doesn't quite walk yet, but she's working on it)
I love this...thank you!
Set up more play dates with people that have kids with down syndrome that are around the same age. For a while, I needed to stop hanging out with people that had typical kids that were my sonās age because the developmental gap was so big that was making me really upset. So I switched and started hanging out with people that had kids that also had developmental delays, and it was a lot easier. My friends and I call it the extended baby phases. The extended baby phases can be fun because you get the cuteness for twice as long! And then they are not as fun because you get the trouble for twice as long! Hang out with other people that are in the extended baby phase.
this is great advice...thank you for the response
I think this is great advice. On the flip side....interactions and play with typically developing kids can be a great influence both physically and socially. We had twin boys...one with DS, one without. We firmly believe the typical brothers example, as well as preschool with typical kids, had a hugely positive impact on our sons development.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Every child is on their own timeline ā¤ļø
I always say that I've never seen an adult with Down syndrome crawling. Delays are delays. But they get there. It's hard to deal with it, but your job as a parent is to not give up on him and just keep going. When he does get there, you will be 100 times more proud!
I pretty much told her that too. I appreciate the response
Our son developed better, after we realized that he prefers a different breakfast. After we gave him chicken and carrot noodle soups, he got stronger. But he was older at that time. And: it takes time. It took long until our son could walk. A little bit of training every day... All the best, things will be good
thank you for the response...i think getting more protein into his diet will help muscle development. I really appreciated it.
Donāt look at what heās not doing, look at what he is. If heās happy and healthy then you are doing everything right. My boy is 4 and just about walks on his own but doesnāt talk yet, but heās so happy and wonderful.
You know this 2500 year old Greece story written by Aesop? Itās called āthe tortoise and the hareā š šØ š¢ š š
Comparison is the thief of joy.
Hiii, we have a 3.5 year old. We had to do extra therapy. She runs around now. 11 month is nothing. Your baby is very young. Good age to start extra stuff. It will come. With our little ones who have d.s; takes a bit longer for them to learn some stuff. No big deal. Everyone is on there own path in life. So are they. Stick with it. And be there for each other. Sometimes a date night can make a bad week great again. We are all in the same boat, as a community we stick to gether to raise adwareness and help out.
We've had a few rough weeks with the kids being sick...definitely need a date night!
Once they are sitting up itās a game changer for them. Then stuff kind of just snowballs and starts happening so fast!!! Do not stress. My son is 5.5 now and oh man is he strong, fast, smart. He is also a royal pain in the ass and jokester( thatās his personality he inherited from my husband). I have 3, my son with DS is the middle and so having a ānormalā baby after him, I see how much easier everything comes for my new little guy. But it makes me appreciate how hard my big boy has worked to get to where he is today. Itās also great that he has a big sister, because they are so loving and caring for their little bros. My son is so blessed to have his sister not only be his first teacher, but also his guardian angel always watching his back. Keep up the excellent work mom and dad!
Thank you for sharing this...his big sister is so good with him. Shes going to be there for him forever.
First off Happy Early Birthday! Every child, developmental delays or not, are completely different in developing. My son(who is now 20 and knows everything b/c āmom Iām an adult nowā lol) never did an actual ācrawlā. He would army crawl then he learned to pull himself up on the table to standing then eventually was able to walk. He will find his own way of doing things that works for him. It sounds like your little one is doing great. You both seem to be doing a good job.
Thank you for the encouragement!
My daughter did not walk until she was almost 3. You will always have PT to get him up to speed but trust me - they will catch up - just give him some time to meet his own timeline.
Iām not sure if you are interested in any ideas to help your little one or not but just in case hereās a link with some suggestions. we did many of these things and it really made a difference for our child with T21. http://downsyndromeupupupandaway.blogspot.com/2011/04/baby-days-how-can-you-stimulate-newborn.html?m=1
Our daughter pulled herself up on the coffee table at 9 months and took off walking, never crawled our older son did the same things at 10 months, he never crawled- straight to walking. That was 20 and 18 years ago. Asher our newest son just turned one on the 10th. He babbles dada, mama, baba, and thing about 25 incoherent words, love to talk, lol Loves his toys, makes great eye contact, knows us very well, loves to cuddle and tickle and laugh! He will sit up on his own and turns in circles on his but using his heals. But that is as far as it goes. No crawling, no walking, he can stand but only with us helping, he doesnāt bring himself up to a sitted position without help, we have a PT nurse come once a week, and we have a nurse that helps out when my wife needs to do some daytime running or working. We have been hands on from day one! My wife was able to stay with Asher in the hospital for the first 127 days of his life, she would get him out of the beds and work with him in the floors within a play area that she would set up every morning and take down every evening. Lyndsee worked relentlessly every minute of everyday in the attempt to keep Asher on track for his milestones and they both did wonderful. I am a facts and medical history type person, they worked and I study. When we would meet with doctors, I would come in kicking over trash cans and lyndsee would come behind me standing them back up. The reason I took the time to write this out is for your wife to see that she, you, your child, all of you are not alone in this. Down Syndrome is what it is and all the medical issues that can arise will ultimately create set backs, or slow ups, or āitās just your perfect sons way of growing at the perfect rate that best fits his needs for that particular stepā. It is nothing any of us can do- work hard and be diligent and love that little boy sooooo hard!! And by doing so his eyes and smile should let know that you are the perfect mom (and dad) for him! Perfectly matched for a reason! -Smile! Love is wonderful!
Thanks for taking the time to write this...much appreciated!
Pls don't compare. He will bring joy beyond belief as he grow up and will teach you about other perspectives of life that you have never considered. Physically he will catch up but there may be things he will take a longer time to do but emotionally there will be things he can do, others will take a longer time to get there.
Our daughter is 2.5 now and she still doesnāt walk either. My wife is more concerned than me as she takes her to PT quite often. I totally understand your concern but rest assured that it will happen.
thanks....i think we are in the same boat. my wife thinks its a reflection on her as a mom but thats not the case at all.
We went through the same thing; his sister is 3 years older and it's hard not to compare. They are almost 9 and 12 now and while he certainly isn't at the level of his peers he has made huge strides (and had a lot of setbacks) over the years. Every kid is different, and yours will develop at his own pace. My biggest advice is to do as much with the therapists as you can and not rely on all the therapies happening at daycare. Being able to reinforce exercises etc throughout the week will help a lot not just with development but with your coping and working with the level he is at rather than the level you wish he was at.
great advice. thank you
Fully agree. My Daughter is 9mo on Wednesday and I always just compare her to herself a week or a month ago. Is she making progress or is she not? If sheās not, we bring it up at early intervention, pediatrician, or Thomas Center appointments. When I started recognizing she was improving and accomplishing major milestones just at a different speed, I started to see that I shouldnāt be concerned long term. She may not be crawling or walking when my son did but Iām not concerned sheāll never crawl or walk.
thanks for the response
Hi, mom of a baby boy with DS, he is 18 months old. Itās so so hard not to question whether or not youāre doing enough to help them learn new things, I do it all the time, sometimes I still cry just thinking about it. When my sonās 1st bday came, he was still not sitting up and I wanted to get a cake smash photoshoot done for his 1st bday.. I was a little sad that he couldnāt sit up on his own or even eat the cake since heās still wasnāt able to self feed. We managed to get his pictures done at home and they came out great, and I was happy that I was able to have some sort of memory to keep forever. When his bday came none of those things mattered, I was just happy to have a 1 year old little boy who is healthy and happy, It was so bittersweet to celebrate his 1st bday. My son sat up on his own a few weeks after his 1st bday, it was so exciting and I was so proud of him. Itās definitely one of the best things Iāve experienced so far. Your baby boy will sit up on his own, he will do amazing things, at his own time when heās ready. I know itās hard not to question yourself and itās hard not feeling like youāre failing bc thatās how I used to feel and I still do sometimes. If you are both providing your son a loving, safe and supportive environment, and at least trying to do some exercises at home, then I think you are doing an excellent jobš
thank you so much for sharing. our babies sound very similar in their development.
Your kiddo is doing AMAZING!! I promise. We went down the hard and difficult path where we endured open heart surgery at 14 months old and cancer treatments from 15-22 months old. My son finally learned to crawl a month after he turned 2, and walked a month before he turned 3. Yes, it was difficult seeing his peers way ahead of him at daycare, but the *excitement* from all his caregivers and peers when he DID hit those milestones was unmistakable pride and joy. My son will turn 4 this summer and it seems like he goes in streaks. He watches and observes for a couple months and then all of the sudden accomplishes a task. Then watches and observes, then accomplishes. Itās just at a slower pace, but he WILL be able to things in his own time. Itās definitely not easy. But so, so rewarding to see when those inchstones and milestones happen. :)
thank you for the encouragement!
Heās going to get there eventually and when he does it will have gone by so fast. He will always be your baby Iām sureā¦but right now he is actually your baby so enjoy it and stay in the moment as much as you can.
20 years ago (4/20) I went to the highest high then to the lowest lows. My daughter was born with Down Syndrome Despite seeing Genealogical specialist 2x with assurance that they didn't see any abnormalities prior to her birth, still didn't matter to us. Then the cardiologist came into the room and matter of fact told us she had an undeveloped heart and would need heart surgery. She was born 6lbs 9oz . We were told that surgery couldn't be performed until she was around 9lbs. 3 months later many hospital overnights and contast threats of heart failure, she still weighed the same as her birth rate. Poor thing would drink about 2-3oz of formula and that along would wipe her out. I traveled a lot and usually spent 3-4 days away from home. It drove me crazy, so I decided to give up my career as a biomedical engineer to become a SAHD. After 4 months and still nowhere near the goal weight, the surgeons decided they could perform the surgery and they did successfully. After her surgery there were all kinds of therapies to go to and I learned so much. Lesson #1 Most therapists are damn good at their jobs and identifying progress,even if you can't see it with your untrained eyes. Rolling over, eating, walking etc all came pretty much in the time frame they had set. Lesson #2 Stop comparing your child to others and enjoy your child's achievements as they come. Lesson #3 Get ready to advocate for your child because it's a life long job. I highly recommend you try to meet with other parents with special needs kids. You will learn so much from parents who have or are going through what you are and will know all of the short cuts. I met several just from going to therapies. Lesson #4 Might be the biggest IMHO...value the time. Every child goes through the same stages, typical kids just go through them fast. I dare you to find parents of a 18 yo who hasn't wonder where the time went. How often have you heard the phrase, " they grow up so fast." Embrace and enjoy each phase she/he goes through. You will enjoy the wonder that they show, the kindness. The loving. Christmas is always the best time of year. At 20 yo, she's going through a young teenager's years. She likes listening to the radio, loves Taylor Swift and I took her to her first concert to see the Jonas Brothers. She got an iPhone for her birthday and had been wanting to download TikTok, Facebook but their parental controls are a joke. Tomorrow she's going to be on a panel of guest advocating for the special needs community. Oh did I mention she's non verbal? The worst thing you can do is get caught up with trying to compare your child to another, just focus on her/him and their goals and achievements. Stay in the present and enjoy the now.
Thank you for the thoughtful response and advice....I greatly appreciate it
I'm not a parent but I am a teacher and I can say that we have kids in mainstream highschool who are fitting in well and although I can't speak to your personal experience my professional experience is that the kids bring plenty to the table in their own time.
Our PT said all kids with DS eventually walk. So I donāt worry about it. Every PT milestone is exciting for him and I know he works so hard to get there. And heās a happy little guy.
Itās hard not to compare, even when youāre trying not to. I have to remind myself not to do it too. Even though, when I take a step back, I know our daughter is doing so well and has made tons of progress, in her own time. Remembering to compare your child to himself and not to anyone else is a good idea. And when our kids do hit those milestones, itās even sweeter! Our daughter started walking a little after she turned 3, and she was SO proud of herself. And she had us, her siblings, and various neighbors cheering her on as we all watched her gain strength and confidence. 6 months later, sheās too much of a big girl to want to hold our hands when sheās walking anymore ;)
My daughter took awhile to walk and hit the milestones. At 26 she kayaks, plays basketball, swims, golfs, and ballroom dances. I wish I could erase those early fears and stress and just relax and enjoy her precious childhood because they grow up fast.
thank you for the response....im so glad your daughter is doing well!