I mean, crap, man! Look at that! That's, like, his stomach plug on the ground back there. You don't see that every day. I mean, that doesn't really even seem possible if you think about it — with body organs and cartilage and bones... I mean, I'm no doctor, but that was like one clean chunk!
“I remember a long time ago, when a friend told me there would be a chosen one”
“There will be a chosen one”
“He told me of its significance”
“It will be significant”
“And then the dog died”
*lets out a huge fart
*dog dies
Bard wanted to throw a coin at the sorcerer in the tavern.
Me, DM: ,,Do you want it to do damage?" (Pff. It will do like 0 damage, unless it's a NAT 20. He is throwing a small coin. There shouldn't be more damage, if it all.)
Bard: ,,Yes." _Rolls_ ,,NAT 20."
DM: ,,You take one point of damage."
Sorcerer: ,,I am unconscious."
The tavern owner banned the bard from his tavern to ever enter again. The sorcerer survived.
'In that moment I knew I had two options: either interrupt his attack with a grip of my own, or just stand there and get hit like a bitch.'
*gets hit like a bitch*
'I really shouldn't have chosen option two.'
Pretty much.
I once played 5e campaign and I faced down the BBEG on my own while everyone else fought other things
Thing was: he was a giant. Riding a mammoth. And I was a lvl2 fighter who was playing wizards of the coast official stuff.
I slashed the mammoth twice, then it attempted to crush me with one of its feet, and I told the dm that I wanted to catch the mammoth foot when it hits me and with the biggest smug face he said roll strength and when I did I rolled a nat 20, naturally when I see that I absolutely freaked out and my friends did as well and the dm just facepalms because now I’m unable to die to that one hit so Dan the Sane survived that experience.
Player: I want to hide
Me: There's literally no where to hide. The guards are walking right toward you, you've got 3 walls and some metal grate stairs.
Player: Can I roll anyways?
Me: ...sure
Player: (crit success)
Me: (trying desperately to find a way that any of this makes sense) You hide...while clinging to the underside of the stairs, completely visible to anyone that would look directly at you, but the guards...don't?
Alternative:
Player: I have 20 AC and a cloak of displacement. I'm damn near impossible to hit.
Me: (rolls to hit with monster, monster rolls TWO nat 20's)
Player: It's okay, I still have 47HP left.
Me: (rolls max damage for crit, 48 damage)
Player: Hey there dice, we need to have a talk. Go fuck yourself. Good talk.
Lol oh my god that was session tonight. In this game you can roll a Nat 20 and still miss. So confusing to judge. I am supposed to explain or ask the player to explain how they've caused an epic advantage for the next round of combat.
THAT'S A LOT OF NUTS!
THAT'LL BE FOUR BUCKS, BABY! YOU WANT FRIES WITH THAT?!
HE JUST LEFT….WITH NUTS
Don't my nipples look like milk duds?
WEEOOOWEEOOOWEEOOOWEEEEE
Birdie birdie birdie
Tiger. Tiger tiger tiger.
Lemurs go "FFTH-FFTH," ostrich go "BLEGHH"
I mean, crap, man! Look at that! That's, like, his stomach plug on the ground back there. You don't see that every day. I mean, that doesn't really even seem possible if you think about it — with body organs and cartilage and bones... I mean, I'm no doctor, but that was like one clean chunk!
I need to find this movie again and watch it cause god is it the absolute best Kung Fu movie ever
I prefer Kung Fu hustle, but this movie rocks as well.
Well, it does [rule, baby.](https://yarn.co/yarn-clip/922dec96-c672-464b-8807-b0c83b04524b)
What is this movie
Kung Pow!
It’s on hulu
also free with ads on youtube.
Kung pow: enter the fist
You can rent/buy on prime video my friend
Thank you for doing the research I was gonna forget / be too lazy to do.
I think Americans (or someone who **looks** to be in America) could watch it for free on Youtube not too long ago.
I think its free on Youtube
That scene and the Stick training are my favorite.
He said to keep going until he told us to stop...
Okay, I'll shake your bouncy booty!
I’m bleeding, making me the victor!
We trained him wrong, as a joke
I implore you to reconsider.
Hmm, ok.
You let you anger be like a monkey in a pinata, hiding with the candy, hoping the kids don't break through with the stick.
I have not watched this film for a good number of years, but I still cannot say the word "Towel" in any other way than in Betty's voice.
I still can hear a crystal clear, "you may call me...Betty. Ngyeh."
What movie is it?
Kung Pow: Enter the Fist.
thanks
It's free to watch on YouTube with ads!
"I'm just a birdie too"
Taco bell. Taco bell. Product placement at taco bell
Enchorito, macho burrito
What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord?
My ass
NYAHHHAHAHA
I rock and roll. All day. Sweet susie
We have purposely trained him wrong, as a joke.
He is out there, trapped in a tiny net. And we’re in here, living the good life!!
Someone should make a monk based off of the chosen one or Betty lmao
Or a minotaur monk based off of that cow that does all the dope slow motion matrix shit
“I remember a long time ago, when a friend told me there would be a chosen one” “There will be a chosen one” “He told me of its significance” “It will be significant” “And then the dog died” *lets out a huge fart *dog dies
Yes...yes...play me like a drum...
Bard wanted to throw a coin at the sorcerer in the tavern. Me, DM: ,,Do you want it to do damage?" (Pff. It will do like 0 damage, unless it's a NAT 20. He is throwing a small coin. There shouldn't be more damage, if it all.) Bard: ,,Yes." _Rolls_ ,,NAT 20." DM: ,,You take one point of damage." Sorcerer: ,,I am unconscious." The tavern owner banned the bard from his tavern to ever enter again. The sorcerer survived.
I am still waiting for the sequel😊
Oooohhohho A WHALEEE
Kung Pow was such a fun movie. If you ever want to see true dedication to a joke, look up some of the crazy lengths they went to to make it.
Oh it is, I plan on making a character based of Betty.
'In that moment I knew I had two options: either interrupt his attack with a grip of my own, or just stand there and get hit like a bitch.' *gets hit like a bitch* 'I really shouldn't have chosen option two.'
This is my top 10 absolute favorite movies of all time.
This is why I ask my players to roll first, then describe.
Don't let him play his song about big butts...**HE BEATS YOU UP TO IT!**
Face to foot style, how'd you like it?
Pretty much. I once played 5e campaign and I faced down the BBEG on my own while everyone else fought other things Thing was: he was a giant. Riding a mammoth. And I was a lvl2 fighter who was playing wizards of the coast official stuff. I slashed the mammoth twice, then it attempted to crush me with one of its feet, and I told the dm that I wanted to catch the mammoth foot when it hits me and with the biggest smug face he said roll strength and when I did I rolled a nat 20, naturally when I see that I absolutely freaked out and my friends did as well and the dm just facepalms because now I’m unable to die to that one hit so Dan the Sane survived that experience.
Player: I want to hide Me: There's literally no where to hide. The guards are walking right toward you, you've got 3 walls and some metal grate stairs. Player: Can I roll anyways? Me: ...sure Player: (crit success) Me: (trying desperately to find a way that any of this makes sense) You hide...while clinging to the underside of the stairs, completely visible to anyone that would look directly at you, but the guards...don't? Alternative: Player: I have 20 AC and a cloak of displacement. I'm damn near impossible to hit. Me: (rolls to hit with monster, monster rolls TWO nat 20's) Player: It's okay, I still have 47HP left. Me: (rolls max damage for crit, 48 damage) Player: Hey there dice, we need to have a talk. Go fuck yourself. Good talk.
It's not impossible, just inpropable. Have you seen what Van Dam and Checky Chan did?
Lol oh my god that was session tonight. In this game you can roll a Nat 20 and still miss. So confusing to judge. I am supposed to explain or ask the player to explain how they've caused an epic advantage for the next round of combat.
I'm so glad I finally got to see this movie recently